The Fourth Letter

The third letter had arrived just like the first and the second, it also contained new information about Jessica Horowitz but Jessica herself had finished that letter by saying third year was the least important year for her. Now Ron found himself waiting for the post to arrive. He remembered fourth year better than any other year, he had spent more time with her that year than any other. He and Harry had been in a fight and at the time Hermione had taken Harry's side so he wasn't speaking to her as much either but Jess was there.

Hermione had watched Ron walk past the front door at least four time that morning and she was beginning to worry about him usually he was barely awake until eleven on a Saturday morning. "It might not come you know." She said matter-of-factly. Ron looked at her slightly startled. "What? I mean I know," he shrugged "I don't care." Hermione knew he was lying, he cared and he cared a lot. Not long passed before the all too familiar clanging sound of the letter box occurred. Ron slowly rose from the chair he was sitting on the edge of, he walked to the door and starred down at the envelope that lay on the welcome mat. He half-smiled at Hermione before picking it up and heading towards the kitchen.

Dear Ronald Weasley,

I hope you are well, Ron. I hope you are happy and that these letters have not hurt you or upset in any way. I wish it were easier to explain things to you, I wish I had just told you the truth in the first place. I feel sometimes that you know me the best even though truthfully you know so very little.

"If Harry said he didn't do it, then don't you think you should believe him?" I asked, you'd been moaning all morning about how he was your best friend but hadn't told you he put his name in the goblet of fire. "You're supposed to be on my side!" You replied, your voice rising slightly. A moment of silence passed before you looked up at me "Sorry." You said and I shrugged, it didn't matter if you shouted at me, if it stopped you being so upset about everything then it was fine. Another slice occurred though this one was more comfortable than the last. "Tell me more about the dragons, Ron?" I said bringing my feet up onto the bench we sat on. "They're big and scaly, what's more to tell?" I laughed and leant against your side, stretching my legs along the bench. Your face reddened slightly but you didn't move away. "Are they as beautiful as the pictures in the books in the library?" I asked and you shrugged but smiled "I guess so, if you find terrifying to be beautiful."

We spent most of lunch time on that bench down that empty corridor. "We should probably leave soon, lunch is almost over and empty corridors won't stay empty for long." I said but made no attempt to actually move, you sighed. In unison, we both stood as if pulled apart by some magical force. "At least tell Harry about the dragons, Ron?" I pleaded looking up at your eyes, you were over a head taller than me but so was most of our year now, I was short and petite in everyway. "See you later, Jess." You acted as if you'd not even heard me. You tucked a stray piece of hair behind my ear and left without another word. I'd stood there motionless for only a few seconds but it felt like hours. I was brought to my senses by someone barging into me. "Get out of the way, you stupid waste of air!" I guess they could have said worse but even the little insults hurt like a thousand knives. I didn't see who said it, just a flash of blonde hair and green tie.

You made up with Harry not long after that so our meetings became less frequent but it was okay. I'd made friends with a few of the French girls that were visiting Hogwarts and for the first time in months I felt truly happy. The Yule ball was the next thing to cause a stir in the hallways of Hogwarts. I'd hoped you would ask me but I knew you wouldn't. On the day the ball was to be held I came across the Hufflepuff champion Diggory, he was sat alone in the library staring at the golden egg. "Why don't you open it?" I asked as I replaced my books in the right places on the shelf. He looked up at me curiously "Because, it only makes a terrible noise. It doesn't really help." I thought for a moment before replying "Have you tried opening it in different things, like um… Fire maybe or water." He looked at me like at wasn't very sane, a look I often got from my fellow class mates. "Just a suggestion." I shrugged before leaving past Professor Moody and Madame Pince.

My ball gown wasn't eccentric, it was simple and plain. It was floor length in lilac with a floral pattern leading from the shoulder round the waist, in fake diamonds. I hadn't originally planned on going to the ball, I had planned on going home for Christmas but my Mother decided otherwise and so I ended up stuck at Hogwarts. The dance was boring mostly, I didn't have a date and dancing alone wasn't really an option. I noticed, as it was getting late, you arguing with Granger, she seemed distraught and you didn't seem happy either.

"You okay?" I asked as I caught up with you as you left the hall. The corridors were mostly deserted as everyone was either in the hall or in their common rooms. "Yeah." You sighed and stopped walking "It's just ridiculous!" You cried, your voice rising slightly. "Hermione shouldn't be with Krum, he's an idiot!" I took your hand and squeezed it for comfort. The music from the hall could be heard quite clearly from here. Without really thinking about it I took your other hand too and began to pull you around, you seemed to get the idea that we were dancing after a few moments.

"This is our song, remember?" I asked, you looked at me blankly "The song we danced to in the library back in first year." A look of recognition crossed your face and you smiled "Oh yeah!" You said "I remember now." I laughed as we danced in the corridor "Do you remember the look on Madame Pince's face?" I asked, you looked at me with a cheeky grin "Not really, but I do remember your face being as red as a tomato." I cringed and laughed at the same time. We talked and danced until the song ended then we stopped and looked at each other. "How do you always know how to cheer me up?" You asked and I didn't know how to answer you. "I guess I just follow my instincts?" I said "I just do what comes naturally to me." We talked for a while longer before parting to go to bed.

I guess you know how the rest of the year played out. It was tragic, scary and the worst part is I never actually Saw any of it coming. Professor Trelawney had been teaching me how not to See things when I slept and so far I had been very good at it. I guess if I hadn't been taking lessons I may have been able to See what would happen to me that summer.

I never did tell you how I came to be on your doorstep that summer. In fact it was quite by accident.

My mother had seemed strangely happy that summer though it wasn't impossible to know why. After Harry's ordeal everyone knew why she was happy. My mother was a death eater. She was all too happy to tell Him about my abilities and it wasn't long before he sought out my help. I didn't want to help him, couldn't help him. My mother would hear none of it, I would do as I was told or face the consequences. I hadn't thought the consequences would be as bad as they were. I think I remember your mother saying I was lucky to be alive. He wanted a prophecy; though I'm not really sure what good a prophecy would have done him. I can't begin to describe the affects of the cruciatus curse. It was my father that saved me I guess. He was the one who set up the port key and got me out of the house. I was too weak to run on my own, my body shook when I tried to move. My father was a great man, who fell in love with a woman that didn't deserve him. He was killed by my own mother as we attempted to make our escape.

The port key took me to a field. I had no idea where I was and assumed the destination of the port key had been chosen at random. I wanted to curl up and die right there in that field, under the starry sky but I could see lights not too far away and the thought of my father dying to save me spurred me on. I pushed myself up onto unsteady feet and stumbled and crawled my way to the strange looking house. I knocked on the door so gently I was certain no one could have heard me but the door opened. I was shocked to see your face looking at me with the same amount of shock. I managed to say an astonished "Ron." Before collapsing right there on your doorstep.

I don't know what happened after that but I woke up a while later, laying on your sofa with you staring down at me.

"Ron." I said again and you smiled at me. "Thank Merlin, you're awake." You said and stopped me as I attempted to sit up. "Mum says you've got to stay laid down." You looked at me with eyes so full of worry that I didn't even object. "What happened to you?" You asked "Dumbledore turned about just after you did and explained everything to my parents but no one will tell me anything." I sighed and closed my eyes. "I'm fine Ron." I whispered "don't worry about me." I fell asleep and when I woke up again it was early morning, you were snoring lightly and I snuggled into your side, you felt so warm and safe, it was like coming home. I just lay there for the next few hours until you woke up. I barely left that sofa for the next week. We played games and talked and I got to know your family. Your mother is an exceptional woman, she took me in as if I were her own daughter, even though she barely knew me. Your brothers, Fred and George made me laugh and your sister Ginny was very curious about how we knew each other, though I didn't explain a lot to her she seemed satisfied just knowing a little more than the others. Granger arrived at the burrow about half way through the holidays.

She was polite when we met though I had a feeling she didn't like me all that much. I couldn't really blame her though, the Slytherins treated her badly and I had just shown up out of no where claiming we were friends. "I had always wondered where you snuck off to on a Thursday evening." She had said.

I was feeling much better by the time we were told we were leaving the burrow. Grimmauld Place would have been quite beautiful if it hadn't been so run down and there hadn't been that horrible portrait of that beastly woman that shrieked at every little noise. It was strange but I never felt quite as at home here as I did back at the burrow. There was always people coming and going and we were often told to stay upstairs. I didn't mind that at all. In fact one of my favourite memories was made in one of the rooms upstairs.

"Jess?" You called and I looked to the door of the room and called back "In here." You entered the room and smiled at me "I've been looking for you for ages." I just nodded and looked back at the wall. The room was empty and bare but the walls were beautifully decorated with a family tree. I think I found all the Slytherins I knew on that tree but I was scared to look for myself. I was certain I was on it but the idea of seeing it written down scared me. I didn't want to be connected to the people who made my life a misery. I didn't want to be connected to any of those monsters.

"Hey, what's wrong?" You asked the smile falling from your face. I just shook my head holding in tears that should have been let out years ago. You gathered me in you arms and held me tight. We stood like that for minutes but it seemed longer. When we finally let go, you still held my hand. "Jess-" You began but I didn't want you to finish. I kissed you. I pulled away almost instantly and the moment of warmth that filled my body was quickly replaced with a chill. We stared at each other, I was unsure of what to say. Slowly, you reached for me and this time the kiss was deeper and longer and it felt like I was flying which was insane really.

When it was over it was just that, over. We didn't talk about it; I don't think you even thought about it. I did. We just acted like it never happened and that was okay for a while but by the time Harry arrived, it had started to kill me, I needed to know what was going on inside your head.

We had to explain who I was to Harry, twice. The first time he was angry you hadn't written to him and though he was the one asking questions, he wasn't really listening to our answers so we explained again once he'd calmed down a bit. He seemed to accept it and just move on. He was polite to me and though we weren't friends he didn't act like I wasn't there or exclude me from conversations. It was nice.

I was upstairs in the library reading when we were next on our own. It wasn't often that I could go in the library since Granger had seemed to adopt it as her second bedroom and she was still being a little cold to me, but she was getting warmer. Harry had dragged her out into the rest of the house, telling her she needed to see a new set of walls. I sat with my back to the door in a soft armchair reading a book on magical creatures that I had found on the one of the many shelves of the small library.

"Hey," you said making me jump slightly, you chuckled to yourself "What're you reading?" You asked and I shrugged, I hadn't actually looked at the title but I did now. "Magical Creatures You've Never Heard Of by Alexander D'Combier, who ever he is." I laughed. "What are you doing in here; I thought you were allergic to books?" I joked and your ears reddened slightly.

"I was looking for you, actually…" You replied and I looked at you curiously and slowly you reached for me, it was like we were stuck in slow motion, the kiss was so full of need and want; I dropped the book on the floor and, it being quite heavy, probably made quite a loud bang but I never heard it. There was only me and you and us. You often hear adults telling children at our age, fifteen, that it's impossible for us to know what love is, they're wrong. I could feel love in that room, it was pouring out of me like a waterfall and maybe I should have told you how I felt but I was scared, what if you didn't feel that way? What if I was just a game to pass the time till someone better came along? I pushed the thoughts to the back of my mind.

We sat for hours, squished into that armchair, unable to move without the other moving with us. We read bits out of books and talked about going back to Hogwarts soon and what was going to happen when we got there. We agreed that we'd still meet on Thursdays but I told you that I didn't want to impose on you and your friends, you told me not to be stupid but even so I decided to keep my distance.

We left for our fifth year not long after that.

Well that's enough I think. Until next time dear.

All My Love,

Jessica Olivia Horowitz.

Ron rubbed his tired eyes, how could he not have seen any of it? Why did he not press to know what had happened to her that summer? And why did he not tell her back then how much he loved her? So many questions floated through his mind and none of them seemed to have any answers. The letters seemed to fill in all the details that he hadn't had at the time but even so Ron felt that there was still things that had not been covered, things that Jessica still wasn't telling him, but what?

Sorry It took so long for this chapter to be uploaded, I've recently had zero inspiration for writing anything and have found it very hard to write. I apologize if this chapter is not up to expected standards. Thank you to everyone who reviewed the previous chapters and please continue to review as every review gives me that little extra boost to write more. Thanks for reading :) ~ WeWereJustChildren