Chapter 4

The day was awful and awkward. My revelation on camera had caused everyone in the building to become uncomfortable and silent. When Lester got back, I finally called a meeting for every one to attend in the rec room because it was the biggest room.

"Gentleman, our leader is 'in the wind' on a mission. I don't know how long he will be gone. Some of you know that I announced that I'm expecting. With Ranger gone this is going to be a difficult time for me and I would like to ask you to respect my privacy and not discuss this with anyone other than those of us in this building. Can you do this for me guys?"

God bless every one, they all nodded. "Sure Steph, No problem Bombshell, Whatever we can do for you Gorgeous, We got your back!"

"I love you guys," I said. They all kissed and hugged me and offered congratulations.

I went to my office and shuffled around papers for half the morning. Lester popped his head in before noon and said, "Let's go to Shorty's for pizza, gorgeous."

We got a table in the back. Lester sits with his back to the wall like Ranger. I think that's an Army Ranger thing, "Always be aware of your surroundings."

Lester asked, "How are you, any better?"

"I wish."

The waitress came then and took our order.

"I'm going to be sick for a while and Ranger is gone and in danger."

He looked concerned. "This is almost more than I can handle right now, Lester."

"Gorgeous, he was fucking blown away. Lester broke out in a big wolf grin. He totally loves you."

"Well, why did he leave me? Is he giving up already?"

"No, he is punishing himself. I didn't know he would do something like this. The only thing that concerns me is that he went alone. We normally take a brother or more as a team. Don't underestimate him. he's tough. I think it's great you're having a baby! I can't wait! I'm going to be an uncle!"

"Shhh, lower your voice. I'm not really planning on telling anyone else for a while. I wasn't even going to tell Ranger because, you know…"

I saw his realization of my dilemma spread across his face. "Steph, I don't really think that it's going to matter to him."

"I don't know that for sure and I'm still a little scared of seeing that other side of him again. He was a little cold when he left."

His grin changed at the reminder and he looked sad. "Steph, we have seen and been through some hell; some really bad shit. That side of Ranger that scared you has also saved many lives. It drug my ass out of the fire several times and Bob and Tank would tell you the same thing. That's what makes him so good at his job. You know I'm not condoning what he did to you, but I know how much he loves you. He knows what a dumb ass mistake he made. He really suffered for it. I have seen his version of scared for you before, but after he did that and lost you, it changed him. None of us have ever seen him in that shape, ever. He was almost broken; he was a haunted man. That's why I know that it just won't matter."

I had tears in my eyes. "I never looked at it that way, Lester. I knew he had demons. Ella and I talked about that. I'm sorry for what you guys have been through."

"It's our job gorgeous. Somebody has to do it. Might as well be a good looking super hero type like me," he beamed. I gave him a punch in the arm. Just then our food came and we enjoyed it while Lester shared his latest sexual conquests with me. He is such a horndog.

A couple of people knew that I loved Halloween parties. We decided to have a party this Saturday night in the rec room and everyone that wasn't on duty could participate. Being that the Merry Men always had so much fun at my expense, I had come up with a fun idea for Merry Men costumes and I was going to break the news at the morning meeting.

In the conference room, after Tank concluded all business related news and asked if anyone had questions or any other pertinent news. I held up my hand. "Bombshell?" "Tank, I have a fun idea for the Halloween party. I'm in charge of the costumes and all the Merry Men will draw for their costume. I want every one to meet me in the rec room today at lunchtime."

Tank raised an eyebrow. "Oh, don't be a party pooper. You're drawing too. It's just an opportunity for the guys to have some laughs and blow off some steam."

I caught Ella in the lounge and told her my idea for costumes and she laughed. I asked her if she wanted to help. Ella was a good sport and liked to have fun with her boys. We decided after the names were drawn, we would go shopping and then she was going to sew some of the costumes.

After lunch I walked into the rec room with my bowl. "Okay boys we are going to have a little fun for Halloween. You guys are going to draw for your costume. Ella and I will be making them for you. So who wants to draw first?"

As always, Lester the biggest kid of the bunch stuck his hand up.

"Reach in the bowl and draw your costume," I said.

He grinned and stuck his hand in and opened the piece of paper. His brow furrowed, "Nuh Uh! I'm not wearing this." Bobby snatched it out of his hand and started laughing. I grabbed his hand and looked at it.

"I wouldn't laugh if I were you, because you're next. Draw one." Bobby stuck his hand in and pulled a paper out and his eyes got big. I looked at his. "Oh, you're going to have a partner," and I giggled.

"Draw one Tank." He drew and I looked at it and laughed. "That's perfect for you Tank." He didn't look very happy.

Then Hal drew and turned red, Ram snorted, Cal grinned, Junior chuckled, and Hector cursed in Spanish. Woody walked in. "Draw from the bowl," I said. Woody pulled out his hand and looked and grinned. I peeked at his paper and said, "Yo Bob! Here's your partner right here."

All the guys had grimaces on their faces like they just stepped in Jake poo. "Oh come on guys, trust me. It'll be even more fun if you don't tell anyone your costume. Well, see you later. Ella and I have some work to do."

Ella and I went to a Halloween store and picked up what we could and then went to a fabric store to get some stuff for her to sew the rest of the costumes. We had decided to stop at a diner for some lunch and when I walked in, the barrage of food smells hit me and I put my hand to my mouth and ran for the restroom.

Ella had followed me in and waited at the stall door. She helped me to clean up and we went back into the diner and took a booth. The waitress came and we placed our order.

I looked at her. "You knew already didn't you?" She nodded.

"I had suspected."

"I'm still a little scared of him Ella. This baby could be Nash's."

"I don't think it will matter Stephanie. I think that Ranger would raise the child as his own if there is a promise of a life with you."

"So you, Lester, and Bob agree on that note." She smiled.

"Stephanie, this is not bad news. You loved Nash for a short time and if he gave you a special part of him then that would not be a bad thing and if the baby is Carlos's it will change both your lives for the better. This situation will work itself out and you have the love and support of many friends. You are like my daughter and I will be there for you. I love you child."

"I love you too Ella," I said.

We ate and talked about the costumes and went back to Rangeman.

Today was Friday and I couldn't put it off any longer. I had to go to the "Burg." I selfishly wished Ranger were here to go with me so that I didn't have to listen to more of my mother's diatribe. I missed him already.

I called home and told them I would be there. Grandma Mazur's radar was on and she was at the door. "Hi Stephie girl. Where's Ranger?"

"He is on a mission right now."

"That's too bad. I told the girls at the Clip and Curl that tonight was the night. I was going to check out his package good."

I grinned at the picture and thought stupid Ranger. If he wanted atonement all he had to do was come to dinner with me tonight.

My Dad was in his usual place in the recliner. "Hey pumpkin, how's my girl?"

"Good Dad, Val and the kids coming?"

"Should be here in a couple minutes."

With that we heard a car door and a commotion outside. In came Valerie, Albert, and the girls and mom called us to dinner.

We began passing the pot roast and the sides. Valerie was filling the girls' dishes. My Dad wanted to know how the partnership at Rangeman was going and I told him fine.

Dad said, "Proud of you pumpkin."

Grandma said, "Me too Stephie. Us independent girls can do anything we want."

Dad muttered, "Independent my ass."

My mother said, "Well Stephanie, doesn't this take up too much of your time? What will happen when you get married and have children? You can't run a business and be a mother, too. Where is Ranger, did you ruin that relationship too? No man appreciates a loose woman. Didn't I raise you better? It's not proper and all those strange men and just you and the cleaning woman." This struck such a painful chord in me right now. Before I knew it I was standing with hands on the table glaring at her.

"I'm Super Fucking Wonder Woman Mom! I'm better than the average Burg slave and I can do it all! Those strange men as you call them are mostly war heroes and I love every single one of them like brothers! Don't you ever bring this up to me again! EVER!"

Everyone was stunned. My sister and Kloughn had clapped hands over the girls' ears but they were still pointing at me and giggling. My mother's mouth was hanging open and she cut her eyes to the cabinet where she kept her liquor.

"Val, I am so sorry I dropped the F-bomb in front of your girls."

Tears started falling then. "I..I think I need to go." I got up and grabbed my purse and jacket and headed to the door.

TBC