Intense pain woke Miranda from her sleep. "Andrea," she whispered, softly brushing the young woman's arm that was draped across her body. Andrea opened her eyes, surprised how restful her sleep was, draped across Miranda's body.
"Andrea, please," Miranda whispered, her tone increasingly desperate.
The young woman quickly sat up, "What's wrong?"
"I can't—breathe—so much—pain," she muttered, her eyes closed tightly shut.
"Okay, Miranda," she said, quickly getting off the bed to grab her pain pills and some water. "Here's your Norco. I think we should set an alarm so you take it exactly every 4 hours."
Miranda took the medication, but Andrea could still see her struggling to breathe. "Miranda," she said, taking the glass of water and putting it on the nightstand. "I realize you are in pain, but you need to relax. Hyperventilating will only make the pain worse."
"I can't," Miranda said.
"Let me try and help," Andrea said, "okay?" Miranda nodded, and Andrea stepped closer, placing her hands on Miranda's shoulders, softly kneading. "Just try to relax," she said.
After several minutes, Miranda's breathing returned to normal. There was something about Andrea's hands on her skin that was calming—almost soothing. "Thank you," she said. Andrea slowly drew her hands back and took a few steps from the bed.
"Dr Barry should be here shortly," she said. "Would you like to relax for a while, or do you think you want to try sitting in the study?"
"Yes, I think a change of scenery might be nice," Miranda said. Andrea held out her arm and the older woman reached out and pulled herself up. The surgeons had to cut deep into her muscle tissue underneath her armpit, and because of that, it was very painful for her to move her upper arms.
Miranda stepped into the bathroom while Andrea brought a few pillows into the study to make her chair more comfortable. Miranda walked into the study, and it warmed her heart to see how the young woman had taken care to make her more comfortable.
"Can I bring you something to eat or drink?" Andrea asked.
"Not right now."
"You do need to eat, you know. Your body can't heal without nutrients."
Miranda rolled her eyes, "I know. After Dr Barry leaves, I will have some soup and tea."
Andrea nodded and helped Miranda into the chair. "Would you like the television or radio on?"
"No." Miranda paused a few minutes, "Can you bring me my cell phone?"
"Miranda, you promised you wouldn't think about work this week," Andrea cautioned.
"I need to call my girls and let them know I'm okay," she said.
Andrea pulled Miranda's phone out of her pocket and handed it to her. "I am going to go downstairs and put some tea on."
As Andrea was busy in the kitchen, Dr Barry rang the doorbell. "Hi, please, come in," Andrea said.
"How is Miranda doing?" she asked, handing Andrea her coat.
"Well, okay, but she's in a lot of pain."
"That is to be expected. Maybe I can give her something stronger," she suggested.
"That would be wonderful. Come, she's upstairs," Andrea said, leading the way to the study.
"Hello, Miranda, how are you doing?" she said.
"Elizabeth."
"How has your pain been?"
"Moderate."
"Does it get worse and then better?"
"Yes."
"Miranda, I need something other than one-word answers. When is it worst?"
Miranda turned and looked away. "It's waking me up. My chest is so tight, I can't take a deep breath. The pain medication helps, but makes me nauseous, so I try not to take it."
"You need to take pain medication. If this one doesn't agree with you, we have plenty of other options we can explore," she said. "Now, how have your incisions been? Any redness or unusual drainage? What does the drainage look like?"
"I haven't really looked."
"Miranda, I need to examine you. Is it okay if we do it here?"
"Uhm, I will just go straighten up the bedroom," Andrea said, stepping out of the room and closing the door.
Miranda looked up. "Yes, yes, it's fine. And please see about a different medication."
Dr Barry nodded. "I'm going to unzip your top, okay? It might feel uncomfortable for a little bit," she said as she reached closer to Miranda and unzipped her jacket, and then her bra top. "Miranda, this looks really good. While I'm here, I'm going to change your bandages. You'll need someone to change them every few days."
"Andrea can do it."
"Would you like me to show her how to do it now?" Elizabeth asked. Miranda nodded and Elizabeth stepped out to find Andrea.
When they returned, Andrea couldn't help but gasp. Miranda's breasts, despite the bruises, stitches, and drains, were absolutely beautiful. She didn't expect anything less, but something about seeing them in person took her breath away.
Andrea watched as Dr Barry showed her how to remove the old dressing and tape on a new one, making sure the wound was clean. Andrea's eyes avoided Miranda's, not wanting to make the woman any more uncomfortable than she already was. Once her dressing was changed, Dr Barry gently put Miranda's sports bra top back on her before pulling out her prescription pad and writing Miranda some additional drugs.
"Miranda, I'm giving you a few new pain pills, some Zofran for nausea, and some Valium to help you relax when the pain is intense."
"Thank you, Elizabeth," Miranda said.
"Anytime. Now, Andrea, please call me directly if anything comes up," she said handing her her card.
"Thank you," she said, "let me walk you out."
"Andrea," she said once they were out of Miranda's earshot, "Try and get Miranda up and about. Make sure she eats. She is healing well from the surgery, but I'm worried about her. Something is bothering her."
"I will talk to her. She's opened up a little more to me."
"You're very special to her, I can see that."
"Oh, no," Andrea said, blushing, "I just work for her. I'm her assistant."
"Well, whatever you call it. I've known Miranda for years and she would never have even allowed any of her husbands to see her like this."
"I guess that's why she lets me—I'm just an employee," Andrea said.
"I'm not so sure of that. But, you're doing a fine job with her. Please, call if you need anything," Dr Barry said before she stepped out and shut the door behind her.
"Miranda?" Andrea called as she climbed back upstairs. "Are you ready for some dinner?"
"Yes, I suppose," she said. "Do you think we can eat downstairs?"
"Of course," she said as Miranda stood from the chair.
Miranda swayed as she stood, her hand reaching out to lean against the chair. Andrea rushed over and wrapped her arm around Miranda's waist, holding her upright. She didn't say a word, and neither did Miranda, likely not wanting to admit her own weakness.
When they reached the bottom of the stairs, Andrea quickly led her into the kitchen and into a chair. Andrea poured a cup of tea and set it in front of her, then poured a bowl of chicken soup.
Afterwards, Andrea helped Miranda upstairs, where she went to lay down in bed. Andrea made sure Miranda had her cell phone next to her, and then stepped out to the pharmacy to fill Miranda's prescriptions. That evening, once the new pain pill had a chance to start working, Miranda appeared to be feeling much better. Andrea helped to empty her drains before Miranda settled for bed.
"Goodnight, Miranda," she said. "I will be just down the hall if you need anything. Or you can call me," she said, gesturing to the phone on the bedside.
"Thank you," she said, watching Andrea walk out of the room. Andrea changed into a tank top and shorts, taking a very quick shower before climbing into bed, making sure her phone was charged and next to her pillow. She tossed and turned, trying to sleep. No luck. All she could do was lay on her back and stare up at the ceiling. It was interesting to listen to the sounds of the townhouse. While it was much quieter than her own apartment, the high ceilings and architecture of the place seemed to make little sounds echo even more. Just then, she heard a muffled sound she hadn't heard before. She picked up her cell phone, waiting for a text from Miranda.
After several minutes, she decided to go check on the older woman. "Oh my god, what's wrong?" Andrea said as she approached Miranda's bedside. She was in tears. "Miranda, are you okay?" she asked again.
"Andrea," she said, "I tried…the phone fell…I couldn't reach it."
"Shhh, it's okay, I'm here now," Andrea said, trying to calm her. "Do you need more pain medication?"
"Yes," Miranda said, nodding. Andrea rushed to the dresser and grabbed another pill and a bottle of water.
"Thank you," she said, handing the water back to Andrea.
"Miranda, I am so sorry. I should have—"
"Stop it. It's not your fault," Miranda said. "I overreacted. I was…nervous." Andrea gently picked up Miranda's hand, and Miranda squeezed it back. "Will you stay in here with me?"
"Of course," Andrea said as she walked around to the other side of the bed.
"You can come closer. I don't bite," Miranda said.
Andrea smiled and moved closer to the middle of the bed. "Is this better?" she asked.
"Closer," Miranda said, reaching down for the young woman's hand. Andrea moved farther over and laced her fingers with Miranda's.
"Sleep well, Miranda," she said.
The next few weeks went by quickly, Miranda growing stronger each day. Two weeks after the procedure, Dr Barry wanted Miranda to come to her office to have her drains removed. While she was willing to do it in her home, she preferred the antiseptic environment of her operating room. Andrea agreed that it would be good for Miranda to get out and get some fresh air, so they scheduled the appointment and Roy drove them. Andrea stood outside the door while Dr Barry removed Miranda's drains.
"Aaaah!" she heard Miranda scream. Her body tightened in fear as she felt the woman's screams resonate in her own body.
"Andrea?" Dr Barry called out, sticking her head out of the room, "Please," she said, gesturing towards the room.
Andrea quickly followed her, rushing inside. Miranda was buttoning up her blouse when Andrea stepped in. "Miranda, are you okay?"
"Yes," she sighed. "Much more painful than I expected, but it's over. Andrea," she said, pausing, "Would you like to go somewhere for lunch?"
"Are you feeling up to it?" she asked.
"Yes. I am. And I'm hungry."
Andrea smiled. "Pastis?"
"Yes, that sounds good."
Andrea quickly called to make a reservation and texted Roy. It was the first time she had gone out in public with the real Miranda, not the editor.
Miranda ate a steak sandwich, while Andrea chose a salad. "Miranda," she said, interrupting their silence. "Do you miss it?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Do you miss working, Runway, hectic schedules, all of it?"
"I never thought I would say this, but no. I really don't."
"Are you going back?"
"Not for a while. Chemo starts next week, and well, it might be a good time for me to step away."
"You can't be serious?! Miranda, you are still so young and talented and gorgeous. Will you start another magazine or something?"
"Andrea, I can't really think about that right now. And while I'm flattered at your compliments, I am old, and I am unhealthy. It's not exactly the time to be planning my future."
"Miranda, I didn't mean to push you. I just think, when the time is right and when you're ready, you should think about it. You just have so much more to give to the the world."
"Perhaps," she said. "What was it you told me weeks ago? Take one day at a time?" Miranda said with a smirk.
"Yes, I guess I did."
"Well, today I just want to enjoy being out of the townhouse right now."
Andrea smiled and they finished their lunch in relative silence. On the way back to the townhouse, Roy drove by Elias-Clarke. Andrea said nothing, but she could feel the woman grow tense next to her.
Miranda continued speaking, looking out the window. "They are doing fine without me. I don't know if that's good or bad," she said.
"Miranda, I'm sure they miss you," she said.
"If they needed me, they would ask me for help. I guess I should be proud."
Andrea nodded. "No one can do what you do, Miranda," she said bringing her hand up to cover a giant yawn.
"Andrea, you need to take some time off. It's not fair that you're locked up in that townhouse twenty-four hours a day. You're young, you have your own life. You deserve better than this, Andrea."
The young woman was surprised at Miranda's words. "Please I'm fine. I want to be here. Miranda, I don't see this as a job. I care about you. A lot. More than I probably should," she said. Sighing, she added, "Don't push me away because of a yawn."
The towncar pulled up at Miranda's home and Roy stepped out to open the door for the two women. "Andrea," Miranda said, grabbing her wrist tightly, "we will continue this conversation in the house." Andrea nodded, and Miranda stepped out of the car and into the house.
When Andrea stepped inside and shut the door, Miranda was already upstairs. Andrea stopped and sat at the bottom of the stairs. She was exhausted, overtired from her disrupted sleep patterns, and now Miranda was trying to send her home. For the last month, the townhouse felt like her home.
"Andrea," Miranda called from the top of the stairs, "I'm going to lie down for a while. You're welcome to join me."
"Oh, I'm welcome to join you? Gee, thanks. I guess now would be the time to pack my things."
"Andrea, don't do this. I am not in the mood to play games. I want you to come lie down with me. I sleep better next to you."
Andrea sat and thought for a second, realizing how much it must have taken for Miranda to say those words. She had grown so close to Miranda lately, she sometimes forgot how sharp and biting her tongue typically was. Andrea immediately turned around, and began climbing the stairs, following Miranda into her bedroom. Miranda had changed into a soft sweatshirt and lounge pants, and was already climbing into bed as Andrea approached. She took her blazer off and tossed it on the chair, kicking her shoes off before climbing onto the other side of the bed.
"Andrea," Miranda said, "I meant what I said. I don't want to push you away. I like having you here. And honestly, it surprises me how much I…how comfortable I am with you."
"Really?" Andrea asked. She couldn't believe what she was hearing from the silver-haired editor.
"Yes," Miranda said, turning slightly to her side to reach over and take Andrea's hand. "I like who I am when I'm with you. I can't really explain it any further, and I know it doesn't make sense, but I don't have the strength to figure it out. I just know I can't afford to lose you."
"Miranda, I feel like I hardly do anything for you anymore. You have a housekeeper, and I just, I don't know, keep you company."
"You do a lot for me. And even if it's just keeping me company, your support is more than I could have hoped for," Miranda said.
"Miranda, I would do anything for you. I hope you know that."
"I think I do, Andrea. I still don't know if I believe it, but I hear you," Miranda said, bringing her hand up to her lips and softly kissing it. "Now, let's get some rest."
TBC... please r/r!