Looking over, Miranda smiled at the brown hair that spilled across the pillow next to her. Smiling, she realized it was already late morning—they must have slept at least ten hours.
"Good morning, darling," Miranda purred, her lips inches from Andrea's ear.
"Mmmh," Andrea moaned, smiling as she pulled Miranda closer, her eyes still shut, blocking out the light.
"Did you sleep well?"
"Yeah, slept in for once," Andrea said.
"I'm sorry if I've been depriving you of your lazy mornings," Miranda said. "Actually, I'm going to take a shower, so you can stay in bed even longer if you'd like."
Andrea reached out for Miranda's wrist as she started to climb out of bed. "Can I join you?" she asked.
Miranda turned to look at her, lips pursed, eyebrow raised. "Wh-what?" she spat.
"Oh, uh, nothing," Andrea said, turning her eyes downward, "I just wanted to know what you'd like for breakfast."
"Oh," Miranda said, shaking her head as she kept walking toward the bathroom, "I'll have anything, you decide." She quickly shut the bathroom door behind her, turning the lock as she pressed her forehead against the wood surface. Yes, they were intimate yesterday, but the shower was well-lit. There were several mirrors in the bathroom, and there would be no way for her to hide her insecurities. Showering was and would remain a private experience for Miranda.
Andrea slowly got up. She saw how Miranda freaked when she suggested they shower together, but decided to let it go. Miranda needed to learn how to express her emotions, while she tried to figure out how to be suggestive and supportive without crossing a line. With Miranda safely tucked away in the bathroom, she tiptoed to the guest room, slipped on some silk pajamas and a robe, then headed downstairs to make breakfast.
In the bathroom, Miranda turned the water off, drying her body with a towel. She knew the hot water wasn't very good for her skin, but the streams of searing hot liquid were, in a sense, therapeutic for her. She applied moisturizer to her face, but decided not to put on any makeup, deciding to let her skin breathe.
When she stepped out into the bedroom, she was honestly surprised she didn't find Andrea still in bed. Over the past few months, she had come to realize that if given the opportunity, Andrea would sleep in until noon. Miranda smiled at the thought of the young woman. She slipped into her panties and a support camisole, then tied her grey robe tightly around her before heading downstairs, choosing not to get dressed just yet. Delicious aromas of coffee, bacon, and butter drifted up the staircase, and she hadn't realized how hungry she was until her stomach began growling at the delicious smells.
"To what do we owe the pleasure of this—" Miranda said, peering into the kitchen to see what Andrea was making "—carnivorous breakfast?"
"I was extra-hungry this morning," she said. "Is this okay? It's turkey bacon, whole-wheat toast, egg whites with spinach, and some cappuccino made with fresh cream."
"That sounds marvelous," Miranda said, taking her seat at the kitchen table.
Andrea plated their food, and the two women ate in relative silence, both hungry and unsure how to start conversation. Miranda's phone buzzed, and she excused herself to go retrieve it from the foyer. Andrea could tell by the smile on her face that she received some sort of good news.
"It's James. Tess is going to bring the girls over at 10 AM on Wednesday. He says they have a test on Thursday, so they can't stay past 4, but Tess will also be home all day if they need to go home earlier," Miranda said. She sat back down at the table and rested her head in her hands. "What if I can't connect with them anymore? It's been so long," she said. "And I don't even know where to begin if they ask about the cancer. How does one talk to a ten-year-old about that?"
"Miranda," Andrea said, wrapping her arm around the woman's shoulder, "First, they're eleven. Next, I'm sure that James and Tess have talked with the girls a lot. In a way, they had the hard part."
Miranda looked up and chastely kissed the young woman's lips, "What would I do without you?" she said.
"Well, Miranda, I don't think you need to worry about that. Let's decide on a menu for lunch tomorrow so Cara can pick it up from the market today. And then you have to decide what to wear…" Andrea smiled. "Everything will be fine."
Over the next two days, the two women (with the help of Cara) prepared the house for the girls' arrival. Miranda wanted the house to feel like home for the girls, not too pristine, but she also didn't want them to see any of her medications or paperwork.
"Miranda," Andrea began. They were seated upstairs in the study, Miranda on the couch and Andrea behind Miranda's desk, helping Emily send some emails. "What are you going to tell the girls about me?"
"What do you mean?" Miranda asked.
"Well, do they know I've been staying here?"
"Yes. They know you've been taking care of me."
"But," Andrea continued, "they think I'm still your assistant."
"Well, yes. You are my assistant, Andrea," Miranda said. "Or, did you forget?" she asked, smiling.
"Seriously, Miranda," Andrea pushed, "Aren't they going to think it's a little odd for your assistant to be so close with you?"
"Please," Miranda droned, "tell me how to speak to my children."
"You know, just forget it," Andrea said, standing up from the desk and walking towards the door.
"Wait—don't go," Miranda said, her voice quivering. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. Please, come talk to me."
Andrea paused and turned around to sit on the sofa next to Miranda. "I'm sorry, too," she said, "I said I wouldn't push you, but I did."
"No, I get that you want something more, I just…" Miranda's voice trailed off as she began crying. "I love you, I do. I just don't know how things are going to go with the girls, and I don't want to overwhelm them with anything."
Andrea pulled Miranda into an embrace, allowing the woman to cry on her shoulder while she soothingly traced circles on her upper arm. "Okay, it's okay," she whispered. "You probably won't have to tell the girls anything if they already know I've been here helping you. If they ask, maybe you can say something obvious, like we've gotten to be friends because we were spending 24/7 together."
Miranda nodded. "But," she sniffled, "you want something more, I can tell."
"Yes, to be honest, I am a little anxious about what's going to happen in a few weeks when your treatment is over. I'm still on Runway's payroll, but I don't think I can officially be your assistant anymore. Will I need to find a new job? How long will I have to look? What if I can't find anything here?"
"Whoa, whoa," Miranda said, pulling away and looking Andrea closely in the eye. "Whatever happens, we'll figure it out together, okay?" Miranda softly brushed Andrea's cheek, adding, "One thing I've learned from this whole experience is not to plan too far into the future."
"Miranda, you're going to be fine. You heard what the doctor said," Andrea said, concerned.
"I know, I know. Let's just take this one day at a time, okay?" She leaned in, pulling Andrea into a deep, passionate kiss.
The next morning when Andrea woke up, Miranda's hand was securely tucked inside the waistband of her pants, resting comfortably against her lower abdomen. Andrea woke Miranda, and they each went to shower, Miranda mentally preparing for seeing her daughters again, while Andrea thought of excuses to give Miranda time alone with the girls.
The doorbell rang, and Miranda walked over to answer it while Andrea sat on the stairs. Miranda looked stunning today, Andrea noted. She wore a heavy wool Ralph Lauren sweater dress with tights, both hiding her bony frame and accentuating her curves. Miranda had intended to wear her heels, but even her lower Tory Burch heels were proving difficult to walk in. Andrea reassured her that she simply wasn't used to heels, and convinced her to wear her Chanel quilted black bowtie flats.
When Miranda opened the door, both girls quietly walked in, turning to Miranda and saying "Hi Mom" before they stepped past her and into the foyer. Andrea quickly pulled the girls aside and helped to take their jackets while Miranda spoke with Tess.
"Miranda," Tess said, pulling her into an awkward embrace. Miranda never imagined she would be hugging her ex-husband's wife. "I've been praying for you, lighting candles at church faithfully every week. It's so good to see you looking so bright and healthy," she said. "I've really grown to love your daughters, but I want you to know that I never intend to replace you or to keep them from you—they've been asking about you every single day."
Miranda nodded, fighting back tears. "Thank you, Tess, I don't know what I would have done," she said, stopped by Tess's upraised hand. "I will bring them home by 4pm tonight," she said, smiling as Tess stepped out and shut the door.
Miranda turned around, taking a deep breath, trying not to read into the way the girls walked past her when they arrived. Andrea was talking with them in the den. "So is she really okay?" Caroline asked.
"Can I hug her?" Cassidy said.
"Yes, yes, my gosh," Andrea said. "Your mom is doing really well, and you're not going to hurt her. If I know her, I think she's missed your big bear hugs the most."
Both girls looked, wide-eyed at Andrea as Miranda entered the den. "My darling daughters," she said, tears filling her eyes as her twin girls came running towards her, practically knocking her over with their giant, strong hugs. Miranda smothered her girls with kisses, and Andrea slowly crept upstairs, grabbing her computer and heading to the guest bedroom. Miranda ushered the girls to the couch, realizing Andrea was no longer sitting there.
"What does it feel like?" Cassidy asked, snuggling up alongside her mother.
"Does it hurt?" Caroline also asked.
Miranda took a deep breath, knowing she would have to explain the details to her ever-curious daughters before anything else. "The surgery was the worst pain of my life," she said, "and then chemo made me sick, and I wasn't hungry, but then I was getting sicker because I couldn't eat or drink, but" she paused and kissed each daughter on the forehead, "that's all over, and I'm feeling a lot better now."
"So do you still have cancer?" Caroline asked.
"No," Miranda said, exhaling a deep sigh. "No, I am cancer-free. But the doctor wants me to take a little more medicine to make sure I stay that way." The girls met her with quizzical looks. "You know how if the doctor gives you antibiotics for something, he says to make sure you take it for the full ten days, even if you're feeling better? This is similar. Even though I'm feeling better, I have to keep taking medicine to make sure that cancer doesn't develop in any remaining tissue."
"So is this why you want us to come home?"
"Bobbsey, I've missed you so much," she said, "but it's not fair to you to see me so sick or to know that I'm home, but upstairs in my room resting. Yes, I would love for you to come back now that the tough part is over, but I know that you have school and sports and friends—I wouldn't make you disrupt that."
"We talked to Dad," Cassidy said. "He said it was up to us—and that we shouldn't let you guilt us into coming home." She and her sister both giggled at that while Miranda rolled her eyes, thinking how typical it was for her ex-husband to say that. "So," she continued, "can we move back home in June as soon as school is over?"
Miranda quickly did the math in her head—eight months! "Yes, of course, Bobbsey," Miranda said, hugging her daughter as she held back her own tears. "Hopefully we can see each other a little in-between?"
"Yes!" they both shouted. "We have lots of time on the weekends, then there's Thanksgiving, Christmas break, spring break…oh, and we can text you every day, Mom."
"Excuse me? You have cell phones?"
"Yeah, Dad got us one to share so we could be safe afterschool or if we're at a friend's house."
Miranda nodded and kicked her feet up on the coffee table as the girls continued to fill her in on every last detail that she missed.
Shortly before one o'clock, Andrea came downstairs. "Is everyone ready for lunch?" she asked as she walked towards the kitchen. The three Priestly women nodded enthusiastically as Andrea made four grilled goat cheese, beet, and arugula sandwiches, and heated up the potato leek soup. At the table, Andrea set three glasses and silverware. She poured the water, then returned to the kitchen to plate their sandwiches and ladle out the soup.
Miranda and the girls took their seats at the table while Andrea wandered back into the corner of the kitchen, eating alone as she stood at the counter.
"Andrea, are you joining us?" Miranda called.
"No, I'm, uh, just finishing up in here," she said. Miranda knew the young woman was lying, but wasn't sure why. Didn't they decide she would tell the girls she had become friends with her assistant if it came up?
Andrea wasn't very hungry and decided to wash some of the dishes and clean up.
"Mom," Cassidy asked, "does Cara still come around?"
"Yes, but only three times a week to cook and clean."
"So why is Andy here?" she asked, confused. "You're not doing Runway stuff, are you?"
"She's here because I need her," Miranda said, setting her utensils down. "I was very sick, and sometimes it was scary because I couldn't get myself out of bed, or I was too sick to walk to the bathroom, or I didn't want to take my medicine."
"So, she was, like, a nurse?"
"Well, yes, but she was so much more. She is so much more," Miranda said. "She kept me company, she kept me out of my moods when I was getting depressed."
"I thought you despised your staff, Mom," Caroline said, "except of course Uncle Nigel."
Miranda took a deep breath, silently wishing Andrea was sitting with her, holding her hand. "This is different," she said. "Andrea is more like a very good friend to me now, kind of like Uncle Nigel. She came with me to my very first doctor appointment, and she held my hand." Miranda paused as she reflected on that first touch of the young girl's hand on hers. "And she has been here ever since," Miranda added.
"So, why don't you eat together?"
"We usually do, I think she's getting dessert ready right now," Miranda said, hearing the young woman pull the mixing bowls from the cabinet.
"Is she going to stay here forever?" Caroline asked.
"Do you want her to?" Miranda quickly replied.
"No. I mean, I don't want her to have to take care of you forever," she clarified. "I don't care if she's here. She's cool."
Miranda sighed. "You know, I would very much like for her to move in permanently. We have the space and she doesn't have family nearby, but it would have to be her choice."
"You love each other," Cassidy said, sounding very much like her mother in her blunt statement.
Miranda knew that was not a question. "How do you feel about me loving Andrea?" Miranda asked quietly.
"It would be nice to have her around," Cassidy said. Caroline nodded in agreement.
"You know I love you two more than anything, right? Now let's go make something for dessert, huh?" she said.
The girls eagerly followed Miranda into the kitchen where Andrea had mixing bowls, dry ingredients, and a mixer set out on the counter. Miranda locked eyes with Andrea before the young woman quickly slipped out of the kitchen with her grilled cheese sandwich.
"She still acts like your assistant," Cassidy observed.
"Technically, she still is," Miranda said. "I think she is just trying to give me time alone with you two love bugs, though."
The girls giggled as they began making triple-chocolate fudge cookies. Miranda wasn't even sure where they found all the chocolate to put into the cookies, but they seemed to be enjoying themselves, so she didn't complain. They put two trays into the oven and set the timer, eager to taste the concoction they made.
Miranda closed her eyes for a moment, resting against the counter. She felt her legs twitching, suddenly overcome with exhaustion. "Girls, I'm going to go lie down for a few minutes while that bakes, okay?" The girls looked concerned, so Miranda continued, "I just need ten minutes. Why don't you see if there are any good movies on right now?" she said, gesturing towards the TV.
They nodded and Miranda slowly made her way upstairs, leaning heavily on the railing as she climbed step after step, slowly stumbling towards her bed. Andrea heard Miranda coming upstairs and set her laptop and plate on the dresser, stepping out of the guest room just in time to see Miranda collapse against the bed, but a little short, causing her to slide to her knees on the carpet. Andrea was immediately behind her, helping her up and onto the bed.
"Hey, what's wrong? Are you okay?" she asked.
Miranda took a deep breath, her eyes closed partly out of fatigue, partly from embarrassment. "I'm just really tired," she said as she sunk into the pillows.
"Okay," she said, softly squeezing Miranda's hand. "Just rest." Andrea walked over to the armoire across from the bed and opened the top doors, revealing a large television that Miranda rarely used. Andrea took the remote and turned on Ellen, leaving the remote at the foot of the bed before she went downstairs.
"Where's Mom?" Cassidy asked as soon as Andrea set foot on the first floor.
"She was really tired and needs a little rest. She's been busy in the past few days, more than what she's used to. The buzzer went off on the oven, so Andrea took the cookies out and set them on the baking rack to cool. "While these cool," she said, "why don't you go upstairs and watch TV with your mom?" They nodded and ran up to Miranda's bedroom while Andrea cleaned up the kitchen again. When the cookies were cooled, Andrea packed a treat bag for each of them in a small container, topping one with a Betsey Johnson bracelet and another with a BCBG bracelet. Knowing they needed to be home in about thirty minutes, Andrea headed back upstairs, pausing in the doorway as she watched the three Priestlys cuddled up, all three sleeping soundly.
Andrea texted Roy, then gently knocked on the bedroom door. Miranda's eyes opened first, and darting to look at the brunette, she smiled and mouthed 'thank you.' Andrea nodded, and Miranda woke the girls from their afternoon nap. "It's time to go, my darlings," she said, climbing out of bed.
"I can take them," Andrea offered, suddenly making her presence known. Miranda looked to the girls, but they just shrugged.
"That would be wonderful, Andrea, thank you," Miranda said. "Girls, I hope to see you very soon!"
"You will! Bye Mom, love you," they said. Andrea walked downstairs with them, handing them their coats as they examined their cookies and new bracelets.
The ride in the towncar over to James & Tess's house was relatively silent. Tess met them outside, ushering the girls in to start their homework. Just as Andrea was about to get back into the car, Tess took her hand. "I can see that you love her," she said. "Use this time to get closer. James and I will make sure the girls are okay with everything…and of course, we'll be very discreet."
Andrea was shocked, but realized even in the few moments Tess was in the townhouse, she must have been able to sense their connection. Thanking her, Andrea headed back to the townhouse, eager to wrap her arms around Miranda.
Sprinting up the stairs, Andrea practically ran into Miranda's room.
"Why didn't you eat lunch with us?!" Miranda shouted. Andrea froze where she was in the middle of the room. In all the time she's known Miranda, she never knew the woman to raise her voice.
"I'm sorry," Andrea choked out. "I wanted you to have time with them," she said, slowly walking over to her side of the bed.
"Just—get out of my bedroom!" Miranda shouted.
Andrea's jaw dropped, but she slowly stepped away, heading downstairs. While sitting by herself on the sofa in the den, Andrea realized Miranda needs to speak with a therapist. She clearly still has some issues to deal with, but Andrea couldn't begin to figure it out. Instead, Andrea just pulls further and further away, when that's probably the last thing Miranda needed.
A few hours later, Andrea made a cup of tea and carried it upstairs to Miranda. "Hi," she said, setting the teacup on the night stand. "Do you feel like coming down for dinner?" Andrea asked.
Miranda turned and buried her face in the pillow. "I don't understand what's going on," she said, her voice muffled. "I'm sorry, darling, you know I wouldn't push you away, I just, I don't know."
Andrea sat on the edge of the bed and rest her hand on Miranda's shoulder. "It's okay. I think—and don't take this the wrong way—but I think that we could both benefit from a therapist."
Miranda turned and looked at Andrea for a long time. "I think you're right," she said. "Together?"
Andrea hadn't actually thought about joint counseling, but the more she tossed the idea around, the better it sounded. Andrea smiled and leaned in to kiss Miranda.
"I love you, you know," Miranda said.
"I know. And I love you, too."
TBC… one or two more chapters, as I've said before, I don't have the attention span to keep writing a long story. thank you for reading! please r/r!