Did I really just say that? Alex thought with horror, his cheeks going red. Oh my God, you idiot, snapped the disapproving voice in his head, You're gonna freak him out, and then he's gonna hate you and never talk to you again, and you're never gonna find another friend- STOP! The rational part of him screamed. He was getting better at overriding his Angry Voice, but he still needed work. It's gonna be fine, you're okay, you're alive, look around, look around.

"Yeah, it is, you big dork," John said easily, and Alex let out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding. See? It's all cool. No biggie. Alex turned his attention back to the sketch that John was still working on.

It was really hard to not be visibly thrilled that John was drawing him. Being totally in love with his best friend was hard enough to cover up on a daily basis, so whenever he did something especially cute, Alex had to bite his tongue to keep from reacting audibly.

He died a little inside every time John scrunched up his nose when he sketched or when his cosmos of freckles was especially adorable, or when he flashed his brilliant smile.

The only problem with this whole ordeal was that there was no way that Alex was going to jeopardize their friendship because of some unreciprocated feelings. Not a chance.

Of course, spending the rest of who-knows-how-long pining after his best friend didn't sound so great either, but it was better than being left alone and heartbroken.

Besides, maybe if he ignored his feelings, they'd eventually go away. He could control this, right? Right?

"Hey," said John suddenly. "Alex. Aaaaalex. Earth to Alex," John said, waving a hand in front of his friend's face.

"Huh-what?" John gave Alex his stunning smile.

"Lost up there again, huh?" he said, tapping Alex's forehead. Alex couldn't help returning John's grin.

"Come on, let's go climb Whomper," Alex said, standing up and tugging at John's arm. Whomper was the giant tree out in front of their apartment complex that Alex had named after the Whomping Willow when he was going through his Harry Potter phase. Except, it wasn't really a phase. It was more like a lifestyle.

The boys climbed through John's bedroom window, tromped through his apartment, and raced down the five flights of stairs. When they reached the ground floor, John took one look at who was sitting behind the desk in the lobby and threw out an arm, catching Alex before he could go hurtling past him.

"Old King Georgie is back!" John whispered.

"No way!" Alex hissed back.

"You owe me ten bucks!"

was a decrepit old man who still worked in the apartment's lobby even though he was beyond the help of hearing aids. He had a cane that he often forgot he needed, so he injured himself frequently by trying to go somewhere without it. He stayed in the hospital for weeks at a time, and every time Alex and John bet money on whether he would come back.

"I thought for sure he was dead this time!" Alex whined under his breath.

"Old dude's immortal," John whispered in Alex's ear, sending shivers down his spine. If he only knew what that did to me, he thought. But he can never know. It would ruin everything.