Whispers

by wordsaremyescape

{PREVIOUSLY TITLED SET ME FREE WITH NEW SUMMARY} As hard as she tries to run, there's no escaping the truth. It comes in haunting whispers that make her blood run cold. But he has a way of keeping her warm, keeping her human when all she wants to do is stay numb. The truth doesn't settle in ice. It always slips right off. But his breath is warm...So warm.

5. Chapter 5

A/N: So sorry this took forever. Hopefully the lengthy update will make up for the delay :)

Disclaimer: *See Chapter 1*

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As quietly as he possibly could, Puck shuffled to his sister's room, his body humming with quiet panic when he noticed that she was fast asleep. Only after a minute of reflection, he realized it would make more sense to find his daughter with his mom. Stepping over in just a few strides, his rhythm steadied when he saw Beth propped on Ava's chest watching her intently. A sense of amusement washed over him when he considered which sight was worse; his mother fast asleep and undisturbed or his daughter pin drop silent while she waited for movement. Tickling the older woman's foot under the sheets only served to open her eyes in silent surprise. Noticing that she was now out of her sleepy state, tiny fingers poked curiously at the older woman's face, an echoing giggle bubbling up her chest and out along the bedroom walls.

"Thanks Mama," he whispered, wondering how in the world she managed to make the baby smile when only hours before she was a bundle of anxiety. The sound of her father's voice turned the little girl's head, his name slipping out of her mouth in a nearly musical manner. "Good morning," he smiled pulling her off of her grandmother's chest so she might be able to find an upright position. Beth gave no argument, happily resting her head on his shoulder with eyes wide open. "She give you any problems?"

"She was a little fussy going down for the night. We had to dig through some of Quinn's things every few hours…I hope that's okay." Puck nodded, wondering how even with awareness of her mother their night remained undisturbed. All the same he was happy to see that the substitution was enough, at least for one night.

"I told Becca she could take stuff I left out in the living room. I'm glad it worked." Ava nodded, a change of question clear in her eyes. "Still no change…She freaked out the last time I checked in. Decided to call it after that." Another small nod, the sad smile his mom wore pulling at his own heart. He still couldn't decide when it was that she started taking such an interest in Quinn's well-being but to see it now seemed even more intriguing. "She doesn't even know I came to get this one so I should probably let her know before we have another meltdown." After a short stretch, Ava quietly reached for her granddaughter, an attempt that went with no vocal argument. Instead the little girl held the grip she already had on him, every one of her tiny limbs determined to keep her exactly where she was.

"Da…" she sang quietly.

"I guess we'll see you downstairs. Thanks for keeping her happy." Ava laughed softly, the notion not near as difficult as it looked.

"I raised two boys and a stubborn little girl. This one's a dream." Puck rolled his eyes, the description nowhere near accurate the day before. "Just like her mama." He couldn't help but laugh a little harder. His Quinn and her Quinn were sometimes very different sights.

"I guess she only gives me a hard time." His mother shrugged, a knowing smirk coming across her face. "Price I pay for being in love with her," he whispered. The confession wasn't one he disclosed to a lot of people. If anything that was something meant to be incredibly private. But this was his mom. The woman who could read him just as well as she could.

"You two make beautiful babies," she whispered. Hearing the compliment, Puck raised his head, replaying the words spoken just to be sure he'd heard them correctly.

"We've only ever made her," he clarified. Ava said nothing more, quietly leaving the room and making her way back down to the kitchen. "Your nana confuses me…" At threshold of his room, he motioned for quiet, a soft sigh escaping her lips in response. Sliding back into bed, relief washed over him when he saw that Quinn stayed in relatively peaceful sleep, only clinging tightly to his pillow in his absence.

"Ma…ma." He nodded, surprised with how quietly the baby had spoken. Still, he couldn't help but hold his breath as Beth inched closer to the sleeping blonde, staring at the obstacle in confusion before he moved it out of her way. From there she found her opening between her mother's arms, resting her head as she waited for movement once more.

"Shh..." Clinging to her oversized tshirt, finding access to her breasts was frighteningly easy. Puck let out a small breath when he saw that she'd only brought her tongue gently across her chest, Quinn's eyes popping open with a soft gasp while she aimed to make her presence known. "Not sure we should be doing that just yet, Beth. She's not even…" Expecting fear, his jaw dropped further when her arms only closed around her, one hand working through her hair. Any small note of excitement was short-lived when he realized that Quinn's expression was still frighteningly blank. The contradiction of maintaining a mother's touch when she had virtually no idea where she was brought rare tears to Puck's eyes. "Babe…" he sighed.

"Baby," she barely whispered. Biting his cheek Puck nodded. "Mine…" Another nod. He wondered if Quinn even realized she now laid there exposed.

"That's your baby," he mumbled. "I'm going to take her down for a bottle in a minute. Do you want to come too or stay here?"

"She's happy." Even though he wasn't sure that was an exact description of her current mood, for the moment she was stupidly content. For that, he nodded, running a finger gently along her spine, the feeling making the little girl shiver and flail and latch off.

"You good?" Small hands grazed her mother's face, Puck clearly invisible for the time being. He watched as Quinn pressed a soft kiss to Beth's forehead, the closing satisfying enough that she finally turned her attention to him, tiny fingers tracing his chin. "Let's get you and your mom something to eat, silly girl." Quinn sat up wide-eyed as the little girl came up over his head, giggling madly while he brought her back down to centre.

"Mama," she grinned, Puck's knuckle already trapped in her mouth while she sucked on it with determination. Quietly pulling her top back up over her boob, Quinn watched him intently, flushing for all of a second when she realized what his intention was.

"Better?" Quinn nodded. Puck looked on curiously when the usual sense of embarrassment failed to cross her face like it usually did, no matter how much of her he had already seen. Where are you, baby girl? If it weren't for the warped situation, he would consider the lack of reaction some kind of improvement. Now, he was once more reminded of just how lost she had become. "Come on." Extending his hand, she gripped it tightly, so much smaller in his clothes than she usually was. "Mom's got some good breakfast going." The smell all but sailed up the stairs, making both of their stomachs sound off quietly. Despite being sleep-eyed and sour-faced, his sister mindlessly handed her niece a prepared bottle, the girls' expression hardly phasing her. "Can you hold that?" he mumbled. Handing him back his knuckle, she silently rested against his shoulder while nursing the bottle slowly. "You wanna go sit with Auntie while you work on that? I think it might help her be less grumpy." The suggestion brightened the eight year old's expression considerably, eager hands already waiting. "Go for it…" In the months leading up to it, a good portion of his time was spent preparing for heightened jealousy. Instead his sister took every single opportunity.

Even while she fell into her arms without debate, wide brown eyes followed her parents over to the kitchen table. Becca followed her line of sight, hardly rattled by the baby's fixation. Noah had always made her feel super safe. Quinn too. After learning about what the other lady did, it wasn't surprising to watch her make sure. To better the situation, she slid in beside her brother, her expression giving a little as she watched Quinn continue her blank stare from yesterday.

"Is she okay, Bubah?" Turning his eyes over, he shrugged. No matter what Beth managed to pull from her moments before, how the day would go was still such a mystery.

"I'm not sure," he said honestly. "But she will be. It just might be a little while." When she realized the teen left them a vacant chair, she wondered why Quinn chose his lap instead. Cause she needs to feel safe she thought, still wishing she could do something for her.

"Mommy made bacon," she said softly. "Maybe it'll help her feel better." Catching his mother out of the corner of his eye, the teen's brow rose. No matter how Ava felt about his girlfriend, bacon was always an unspoken secret. Today she'd cracked the hidden treasure wide open.

"We aren't completely kosher anyhow," she shrugged. "I figured it might trigger something for her…" she said cautiously. If that alone wasn't proof of how much she'd taken to Quinn, he really didn't know what would.

"Thank you…" Barely a flutter of sound but it was there. As small as it was, the acknowledgement jump-started his heart.

"What she said…" he mumbled, happier than he'd ever been to smell the forbidden food. Next to him, Becca offered a knowing smile, her eyes shining with amusement. Their daughter stayed occupied with the ends of her long hair, her fingers almost disappearing in the mess. "Gentle," he warned.

"She doesn't pull too hard," she grinned. "And this way, I'm helping so you and Quinn can eat." Was his sister really only eight? In just the last 24 hours her words were far more advanced than he ever remembered them being. Holding a strip of bacon at her lips, Quinn bit off a small piece with caution.

"I guess all she needed was a little bit of bacon to wake her up," he laughed. Ava silently rolled her eyes, even while easing out a small sigh of relief. "Is this going to have to be a frequent thing?" he teased. Even while remaining distant, hazel sparked for all of a few seconds in minor amusement. "I think we might be able to figure that out…" Pulling out her own chair, his mother nodded, only slightly saddened when the blonde ripped away from her attempt at contact. "Mama's not going to hurt you, babe," he murmured. Still she sat tightly in his lap refusing to be moved.

"In time," Ava smiled, taking her minor victories at face value. "I'm just glad to see a little bit of sparkle." Puck nodded, reminding himself to thank his mother for all of the patience she managed to find for someone she once thought to be so terrible.

"Did anybody call?" Ava nodded offering her son a small slip of paper. He had to resist rolling his eyes when he read the name across the top. Harold. That alone prepared him for the size of stick that probably sat halfway up his ass. Archer was very…lawyery.

"He said he'd call back in a little bit over an hour. I'm not sure what this means in regards to your situation but he sounded very…hopeful." Puck laughed, reading a natural scowl on Quinn's face that likely meant nothing important. Even so, he took it as a notion of mutual distaste.

"The guy's just looking for another lump of cash…" His mother shook her head.

"We spoke briefly. I went ahead and explained the…situation—"

"Mom…" he warned stiffening at the idea that a stranger knew how much of a mess they were in.

"I explained that you were both students put in a bit of a bind as a result of an unfortunate situation—"

"Which….situation?" Wrapped in his arms, Quinn was as good as a board, the familiar fear swimming in her eyes he hadn't seen all morning.

"You're still in school…Beth's foster home not working out—"

"Beth was adopted," he pointed out. No matter how carefully it was all being explained, Quinn buried her face in his chest, wishing she could hide away from everything long enough to let it all just go away.

"It's virtually the same thing."

"Ma, you can't lie about stuff like that. It's all in writing."

"I didn't exactly…lie. I was just…"

"What exactly did you tell him?" Even with such a direct question, he watched his mother's mouth fall tightly closed.

"He'll explain everything when you go in at 9." Nine? In the morning? That was in less than an hour.

"Mom! That doesn't even give us an hour." Ava eyed him pointedly. Sighing with exasperation, he groaned. This was not the time for one of her indirect "lessons".

"He's fully booked otherwise, Noah. Do you really want to wait another week?" Without so much as a thought, he shook his head. For something that wasn't even supposed to be a problem, he didn't have the patience to wait so freaking long. "Your sister and I will watch the baby while you go get ready. We'll be leaving at 8:45." Fuck.

"I knew this wasn't going to be fun but damn…"

"This is parenthood…"

"I know, I know. Okay." The smallest smile came across his face when he saw that Quinn managed to clear her plate. It was nothing more than strips of bacon but considering the circumstances, he'd take it. "Let's get going. Beth's going to need a change of clothes. We're not leaving her here. She's going to make you guys want to rip your hair out. No matter how happy she was this morning."

"I'll do it!" Becca offered, jumping at the opportunity to be helpful. Without needing further instruction, she followed the pair up to their room, the baby cooing contently with a strand of long hair in her mouth. "Okay, I'll trade you Quinn for Beth for just a second." When his sister's face fell, he weaved his brow with quiet amusement. "Unless you wanna change her."

"Ummm…I'm gonna help Quinn find a dress…"

"I thought so. Nothing too crazy, okay?" Becca nodded happy to be on assignment. "Alright sweet girl, let's make this quick. Try and go potty before we put it on…" Once laid down in the unmade bed, Beth watched the back of their heads with fascination, her fingers shoved in her mouth. So focused, he only struggled with a moment of resistance, the soft glide of his finger across her belly breaking the tension. "Thank you." A short tickle session to her feet as a reward for her patience and cooperation sent her foot directly to his face, a vibrant laugh breaking any and all tension that still floated around the room. "Close one…" he mumbled sitting her up in just her diaper. From there the laughing continued, even after her source had disappeared. "I'm not even touching you anymore," he chuckled. "Or is that because you almost broke my nose?" Pulling herself toward the center of the bed, she fell face first into the sheets, a mishap that only made the little girl laugh harder. Puck shook his head helping her sit back up. "You gotta sit up, silly girl. She's not going to be able to get you dressed if you don't sit still." After an elongated sigh, she sat in a way that could only be described as "Fabray proper", a soft "Da" slipping out with a strange sense of calm. "I'll be back in a little bit, okay? Auntie's gonna find you something to wear while I go make sure your mama's still with us."

As if having heard her name, Becca poked her head in, her arrival receiving virtually no fan fair by comparison. Instead the baby's gaze was freakishly focused, a soft whimper bubbling free as he inched further and further away. His sister's face barely offered any reaction but still, he mumbled the quietest apology. Even so, Becca managed her brightest smile in hopes of giving her just enough distraction. Even though they all still shared the room, Beth practically howled, Noah's attempt at closing his eyes to dim the sound of it doing absolutely nothing.

"If you want Mom to do it…" he called in from where he stood.

"I got it," she called back, swearing up and down that she could wrangle a one year old who they all knew wasn't going to stop crying. From there he made a mental note to check her one more time before they left.

"If you don't, it's okay," he sighed. Becca had already done more than anyone expected her to, volunteering for things she could barely handle. If this was her way of proving that she "wasn't a baby" she'd already done it. Finally turning his attention to Quinn, her eyes flickered for all of a second before he realized her current state. The dress they'd selected was already part way down her thighs, her bra thrown to the floor. "Quinn…" he sighed, already brought to his knees in front of her. He knew his sister didn't mean to, but the fact that she wanted nothing to do with the outfit was nothing he didn't expect. He quietly trusted that she waited for the little girl's back was turned before throwing it away. "What are we going to do?" Her redirected gaze turned his attention, eyes intent on something in his closet. "I don't know if we can do that, baby. We're going to see that lawyer guy."

"Please….I need to feel safe…" Puck rolled his lip pulling gently at a ringlet of her hair. "It shows too much…" No more than a whisper, the words trying as they were shaped with a voice unused. Puck thought it over for a minute noting the desperation in her eyes. With a soft sigh, he nodded squeezing her fingers as he stood. Seeing as it was her first real sentence in 24 hours, if Harold had a problem with it, whatever.

"What's it going to be?" Quinn shook her head. Her lack of an answer meant she really didn't freaking care. And frankly, neither did he. Pulling down a dress shirt that no longer fit him, he paired it with her favourite jeans hoping the combination was going to be enough. "Try that. I gotta go hop in the shower. Keep an eye on them, alright?" Finally pulled into her other awareness's, Quinn's face washed over with apprehension, her daughter's cries loud enough to peel the paint off of these walls.

"She's hurting my baby," she nearly yelped, a soft hand coming over to stop any attempt to jump his little sister. "Noah, let me go. She…She needs me."

"That's Becca. B's just not happy to see her right now. They'll be okay. Just watch to make sure they don't get into any accidents." Her conflicted look was the most alive he'd seen her all day. "I promise she's okay. Maybe if you go sit with her, she'll settle a bit. Just don't take her from my sister. She's feeling all important right now," he joked. He watched her wring her hands with new nerves, nodding despite her desire to do just that. Not until after Quinn found her place beside them did he step into the bathroom next door. "Holy hell…" he mumbled.

Once dry and dressed, he found a soft smile at the sight of the two of them surrounding a now settled baby. Of course, it helped that Beth had taken her famous position laying horizontal in Quinn's lap, waiting patiently for her just reward.

"Not gonna happen, Beth." Becca blinked, clueless when it came to understanding what exactly her niece was looking for. "You'll have to wait until we get back. We're going to be leaving in a minute."

"Wait for what?" she asked her brows nearly sewn together. Looking between the two of them, he wondered how exactly he was going to word Beth's new fascination with "feeding". "What does the baby want, Bubah?" When he remained silent, the shine of frustration in her gaze made him laugh despite how serious she was trying to be. Explaining Shelby was cool. This was just…This was private. Private and…well, as normal as it was for them…

"Sometimes….You know how sometimes when you have a bad dream you get into bed with me or Mom?" Becca nodded. "Well, because of what happened, Beth does that sometimes. But it's a little different."

"Because she's scared too." Puck nodded. Though the way she fought off her nightmares wasn't exactly something most people made sense of. "She wants her mommy too. It's not different. That's normal."

"This isn't quite like that…Sometimes to feel better…she pretends." Becca just shrugged. If this was supposed to be confusing, she must be really smart. "You know how….when babies are born they asks their moms for food?"

"It comes from their boobs." Puck chuckled despite himself. She was only this blunt because he was. "So…When the baby is scared, she still thinks there's milk inside." Her brother nodded. "But there isn't." He softly shook his head. Becca softly shrugged. "I still snuggle my teddy sometimes. But only when I'm scared. "It's still okay, right?" Even if the situation were a little bit different, he nodded.

"She knows there's no food. She just likes to snuggle with her." The little girl nodded, the smile on her face growing a little. "This is between you, me, and Quinn, alright?" Again she nodded, probably happier to be keeping a secret than understanding what it actually meant.

"I can keep a secret. But Noah, can I ask one more thing?" The question was coming whether he allowed it or not, so whatever. "Can I still come snuggle when I have bad dreams?" He pulled one of the most genuine expressions he'd ever shared with his sister, realizing just how much change this meant for her.

"What do you think?" His sister shrugged. Her brother was a daddy now. And even though she was starting to feel okay about having to share him with the baby, there were things she wanted to keep them same.

"I dunno. You're a daddy now. It might be different."

"Alright kiddo, listen to me," he began turning on a serious tone he hoped would address all of her concerns, taking her hands as a way to emphasis the gravity of his answers. "Just because Quinn and the baby are back in the house, there's still you and me. You need something? I'm still right here. You wanna do some girly thing with Quinn, she's literally a holler away. All we did was have a baby. That doesn't change anything here. It just means I have to be here for the baby too. Can you handle that?" Though her nod of agreement wasn't nearly as automatic, she found it, a heavy sigh of relief coming through. "I'm still here to fight with. Don't worry too much."

"I don't like fighting…" Neither did he but spats were inevitable. "You're better at cuddling." From where she sat, Quinn smiled. She could back that claim up in a second if somebody asked.

"That's supposed to be a secret though, right?" Becca nodded enthusiastically, knowing that the people who knew that about him could be counted on one hand, two at the most.

"But you have a baby now. People aren't going to think it's weird or anything."

"Still." People had reservations that he was a dad. They had equally heavy judgements about the fact that Quinn was a mom. That wasn't going to die down until Beth was at least five; at which point she would be taught to shut them down with her combined wit. "Between us for just a little while longer, okay?" His sister nodded, too happy that she would still have time with her brother to be bothered by the rest of it. "And when the baby and I are busy, Quinn's wide open for cuddling. Between you and me though, I think she might do it even better."

"Nuh unh. You're the best. Even better than Mommy!" Whether or not Ava knew that, he wasn't sure. If his sister already said as much, their mother seemed hardly bothered.

"Have you even tried Quinn cuddles?" Becca thought for a moment, her face falling when she realized that no, she hadn't. "Well there you go. Don't knock it till you try it. I know you don't like it when we treat you like a baby—"

"Cause I'm not."

"…but remember this. You were my baby first. Before Quinn, before Beth…"

"But there's always room for more love. Like Mommy always says." Puck nodded, not needing to look up to know that their exchange had struck a nerve for Quinn.

"You're so much smarter than me…" Becca grinned with pride, her entire body singing with happiness now. She knew that he was only joking but it was still nice to hear sometimes. "Go run down and tell Mom will be there in a minute, okay? Did you wanna come or are you going to hang out with Heather?" Mention of the sitter down the street soured her expression rather quickly. "Alright. Give us five minutes. I have to make sure this tie is on right and the baby's got everything she needs while we're out." Hurrying down the stairs on her mission, Puck rolled his eyes, nowhere near as excited for this appointment.

Beth surprised them both by staying absolutely silent finding her entertainment on the ends of Quinn's hair as they waited. Quinn was another story, still on edge after the mix up with the dress, though it was nothing anybody else really noticed. For that he chose to face her while he worked his tie in the mirror. His mom and sister were already familiar with her silence. Being introduced to a completely different person would make her sentences even smaller if she decided to speak at all.

As her eyes fell to the toned muscles of his turned back, Quinn could feel a blush creeping up her neck. At the moment she was grateful that the mirror stayed between them because even if he said nothing about it, she was sure she'd be able to read the laugh in his eyes. It was nothing she hadn't seen before and yet, here she was flaming up at the sight of just his back muscles, despite the shirt covering them for quite a while now. It was a wonder she could think those things at all. But this was Puck. She knew him well enough that she was allowed to think such things as innocently as she wanted and he wouldn't press her. Turning to face her, he smiled.

"Enjoying the show?" he teased as he buttoned his dress shirt and flipped his tie. Quinn shook her head in denial earning a slight smirk from Puck. "I don't know...You're all pink," he chuckled fumbling with his tie. She shook her head hiding a face behind her hand at his observation, the denial only deepening her embarrassment. "Hate this thing," he muttered. This was even further reason as to why he never freaking wore these things. Putting Beth down gently making sure she faced them as she stepped forward, Quinn patiently worked his tie with a light smile of her own. "What? I never have to wear these things," he pointed out moving his hands to give her more room. "Thanks." Quinn nodded.

The blonde was hardly back in position before the baby crawled into her mother's lap, taking one more shot at her reward. "Soon," he mumbled, part of him hoping she might be able to forget after enough time had passed. Expecting a full-blown argument, Beth visibly pouted, instead burying her head in Quinn's breasts and moaning as her tongue left its familiar trail across her skin. "I hear you," he chuckled pulling her free, a change that received visible frustration. "You want her to do it?" The suggestion clouded her eyes with a sense of fear he hadn't seen yet. This wouldn't be the first time and yet she wasted no time in shaking her head. Probably because you're still lost in your own he thought. As a small consolation, Quinn offered her decorated hand after removing rings so that it could be shoved into her mouth. The familiar distraction kept her quiet long enough, her legs only tensing when he came close to her healing bruises, earning him a soft whimper. "Shh…" he murmured brushing a thumb down the length of her extended legs. "They'll be gone soon…" he sighed. Once free, she rolled back into Quinn's side tugging lightly at her sleeve to get her attention. When she did nothing, the events that lead them here flowing through her mind, Beth worked her way into her mother's lap herself.

"I think Mommy needs a minute, B. Why don't you and I hang out until she's ready? Unlike previous attempts to keep her close when he tried to take her away, Quinn stayed frozen, further down the abyss.

"Mmmm…."

"I know," he whispered, equally confused. Taking her hand he noticed that her gate was nearly robotic as she fell in line beside him, a sudden frantic search for exposed skin untucking his shirt while she looked for the small of his back.

She suddenly groaned in frustration with herself. If she had just stuck it out...If she had listened to herself they wouldn't even have this problem. If it weren't for her she wouldn't have all these added problems, period. If she had just been good...Warm tears pricked her eyes then as she eyed the man beside her, suddenly sharing her daughter's fear. One day soon Puck would realize what a mess she really was. The shock of it all was suddenly too much. As her breath picked up she sank to the floor bringing her knees up and rocking herself as the fist of terror gripped her heart.

"Hey...Shh...What is it?" She only shook her head in reply; face still buried in her knees as she trembled. "I need to see your eyes. Can you use your words?" he asked gently.

"I'll be good..." she said desperately. Puck silently cursed himself as he moved in closer wondering what he had said or done to bring her back to this.

"I know you will," he offered quietly. Whether or not they were ready for it, they would both be good. They would both be the parents they were once too afraid to be. For Beth.

"I know I was bad but I promise to be good. I'll do better."

Quickly removing his dress shirt and tie (they would have to rework it later because he had a feeling things were going to get ugly fast) he brought her into his lap where she promptly found a space to shrink in against him. Thankfully, Beth managed to wiggle free, sitting close to them on the floor while the tears pouring down her face mirrored her mothers.

"Mama." Her name came through in a whimper that would normally gain the older woman's attention. When it was received with silence, she ambled into her father's lap, watching as he tried to fix her. Quickly drying her eyes he tipped her chin to look him straight on.

"I think you're doing an awesome job." As if she didn't hear him, Quinn went on, seemingly oblivious to his reassurances.

"I'm sorry...Was a mistake...A big mistake," she mumbled, tears still running down her face as she spoke. He brought his lips against her sleek skin offering her the most honest answer he could. Puck still had no idea what the hell she was talking about but she'd already used them once. He wasn't even sure she was talking to him anymore. Or maybe she was and still fighting something else alongside him.

"We'll fix it," he said. Quinn shook her head frantically at his words, highly doubting he could do anything about this. If she couldn't fix her own problems, why should he have to?

"Can't fix it...My fault...I was bad." Resting his chin lightly on her head, his fingers played against her warm skin still hidden by the shirt he let her borrow. He felt her flinch at his touch and quickly pulled back eliciting a sob from her throat.

"Relax," he murmured. "I'm sorry I touched." Quinn only burrowed further into him, the absence of his gentle hands too much to bear.

"You said you wouldn't go..." she whimpered.

"I didn't go anywhere," he pointed out, his brow knit in further confusion than he already was.

"Hands..." she mumbled.

"What about them?" he asked.

"Don't go..." Puck thought for a minute trying to piece together what he was hearing. He knew better than to ask her for complete thoughts. It was enough that she was verbalizing at all.

"Use your words," he coaxed quietly. It wasn't like Puck had dealt with any of this first-hand. He only knew as much as his mom shared with her medical knowledge. For once he was glad he'd sat through one of her-at the time-boring lectures about whatever Quinn was going through. He'd forgotten the name of it or didn't care to remember it.

"Hands..."

"What about my hands?"

"Safe..." she mumbled.

"You didn't want me to move my hands?" Quinn nodded silently watching his face for any sudden expression changes. Here she was being the mess he was almost guaranteed to run from. She doubted she made any sense, her own thoughts a complete tangle in her head. Puck shrugged bringing his hand back to rest along her spine. "Better?" Again she nodded, not even sure how she could stomach let alone crave his touch when anyone else made her skin crawl.

"Safe..."

"Glad you think so," he smiled. It was almost as though his touch was her off switch. Quinn was now completely silent and unmoving except for the claw-like grip she seemed to take on him. If she could think these things 'round the clock like she seemed to, Puck was even more determined to keep them exactly where they were. "Let me know when we can move." Quinn nodded mutely soaking in his protection for another couple of minutes before allowing herself to pull back and take hold of his pillow instead. "Let's go take care of business," he suggested carefully prying her fingers from the near death grip she had on the pillow. "They're waiting for us."

"Dada." Pressing a soft kiss to the crown of her head, he got to his feet, pivoting to help Quinn do the same. Despite her eyes being full to the brim with questions, she clutched his hand in near desperation, keeping impossibly close as they made their way back down. Padding quietly down to the kitchen, Ava greeted them at the stove. Puck could feel Quinn go stiff as soon as they entered easing her with a light squeeze of her hand. The older woman smiled softly as they entered, her face falling slightly at the cowering fear she saw in Quinn's face.

"Are we ready?" she asked warmly. Puck offered no more than a quiet nod in response. Ava frowned as he watched the girl keeping a respectful distance. Her mood only worsened when Beth refused to meet her eyes keeping her face buried in Puck's shoulder.

"It comes and goes," he said by way of explanation. The woman nodded rattling her keys in preparation. Despite being more than ready for all of this to be over, Puck now joined Quinn in being a bundle of nerves. "Can Nana hold you for the ride? I'm going to have to drive." Out of the corner of his eye he saw his mother scowl. "I know it's your car. I'm trying to free my hands for this one," he mumbled nodding in the blonde's general direction.

"I can do it…" The offering was more hesitant than earlier, obviously remembering the endless crying that only a combination of her parents' genes brought to the surface. "I mean…If that's okay…" Puck nodded his permission, silently hoping she wouldn't put up too much of a fight. Grunting with only a moments' resistance, her eyes finding their faces seemed to be enough to calm her.

"Just until we get there. I'll take her in a few minutes." Becca nodded, holding her breath only a little as they made their way to the car. "On that note, I'm all yours," he mumbled. Once out of the driveway, Ava eyed her son through the rear view mirror.

"Are you out of clean shirts?" Without a word he held it up, his head directing her attention to the hold Quinn had on him.

"I swear it's clean. I'll sneak into a bathroom and put it back on." He only hoped Quinn would be willing to let go of him by then. "We're gonna be okay," he promised. He had no idea who this guy was but seeing as he survived a conversation with his mother, he had to be relatively decent. Recalling her unfinished comments from earlier that morning left him wondering what exactly the two had discussed. "I don't know where the hell I'm going to find the money for this but we're going to be okay."

---

Sitting in the attorney's office put Puck slightly on edge. He'd only ever dressed up on one other occasion. A period of time he would much rather forget. Even if this reason was different, sitting face to face with a suited man wasn't exactly comforting, especially when they remembered why they were here at all.

"Hello, my name is Harold Archer and we spoke to one of you on the phone earlier about the case of Elizabeth Puckerman Fabray. I understand you'd like to reverse an adoption?" He had to fight the natural want to correct him. Her name was Beth. Just Beth. Still, he managed to hold his tongue. People like him were the reason only three people in his life were allowed to call him by his real name. And really, no matter how proper it was, her names were in the wrong order. The cops had probably gotten it wrong too but whatever. People were lazy.

Puck was the first to greet him with a firm handshake which the other two quietly followed. As he introduced himself, his name felt foreign in his mouth. Still, Puck stayed cordial and waited as the man explained what could be done about their situation. "Under what terms did you sign this agreement?" he began. Puck wrung his hands nervously before speaking, his eyes shifting to Beth who sat quietly in her mother's lap. They had probably made the change while he was in the restroom. To keep her hands busy.

"We were both young," he began. "Quinn spent the whole time going back and forth on whether she'd actually want to keep the baby. Eventually, she settled on giving her up. We just...Well, she didn't feel we were ready to take on parenting and all the extra work."

"And you did?" he asked, his face free of judgment as he prompted the young man to continue.

"Well, I knew it would be hard. Probably the hardest thing either of us would have to do. I knew there'd be sacrifices but...I was ready to give it a shot. Told her that from the beginning."

"So you simply went along with Ms. Fabray's wishes." Puck nodded taking Quinn's hand quietly. "Did you see that as fair?"

"I wasn't the one carrying a baby. She's the one who had her and everything. There was all this extra stress on her and adding a baby to the mix was just going to make it worse." Well not worse but at the time Quinn made it sound like the worst thing in the world an idea that made his stomach twist, no matter how much he loved her. Next to him, the young mother stiffened, clearly very present for the words that spilled from the stranger's mouth.

"But you wanted to keep your daughter, yes? Despite all that you would have to give up to raise this child."

"More than anything, sir. My dad was never really there for us when I was a kid. I know what we did was...reckless and kind of wrong but...I was going to take responsibility. I was going to be there for my kid and her mom. But that's not what Quinn wanted." God, even saying the words made him feel like shit. Quinn was by no means a mistake. They'd made Quinn out of love, even if neither of them really knew it at the time. For him, being with her brought on a feeling he'd never felt before. He just didn't have a name for it. It had taken her quite a bit longer but they were hear now, ready to do what they should have been able to do sixteen months ago.

"Do you feel as though you signed away your rights by force?" Puck thought for a moment meeting Quinn's eyes as he thought about how to word his response.

"She didn't force me if that's what you're getting at. I signed out of respect for Quinn and what she thought was best for our baby. Sure I was dead tired and not really paying attention to much but I understood what I was doing."

"But you still feel wronged," he said.

"Not wronged. More like sick," he said. "We gave her to someone we thought we could trust. We were wrong. We made a mistake. I'm not handing my traumatized daughter over to CPS. I've made that mistake once already and she's a disaster."

"Mom finally sees the error in her ways." Next to him, Quinn paled. Just the combination of words made him want to reach across this table and… To his surprise, his little sister's small voice was one of the only things that stopped him.

"They're both really sad," she said simply. Even if that was nowhere near enough of a reason, his heart began to hammer when he realized she was trying to come to their defense. It wasn't going ot do anything but at least until he cooled down, she would keep the guy talking. Even more surprising was the fact that Harold actually looked like he gave a damn about what she had to say. If Becca got through to him, maybe they wouldn't be read the riot act for being teen parents. For a minute he considered if that was the reason he'd been chosen to represent them.

"Can you tell me why they're sad?" Once she nodded, the four adults waited in anticipation for her reflection.

"My brother made a mistake. But not a normal mistake. He just had a baby," she shrugged. That was only making it worse somehow and still Puck managed a smile. "He made a baby with somebody special." Hearing the compliment, Quinn's breath nearly caught in her chest. "He made a baby with a person he loves. And when you love somebody, sometimes you do things you don't want to. Because it makes them happy. When you love someone like Noah loves Quinn, you gotta make sacrifices. Because their smile's your favourite thing ever." If she had her words, Quinn would counter that giving up her baby didn't make her smile at all. But Becca was making the most mature argument she'd ever heard. "They didn't smile. They didn't smile because nobody wants to give up someone they love. But they did it 'cause they wanted to give their baby a better life. They wanted to finish school. They wanted to get better jobs so that maybe one day they would have more babies together. Every time I saw my brother get sad, my mom would say that he wanted his baby to be proud of him. But he's wrong. He's wrong because she already is."

"What makes you think she's proud of them already? She's just a baby." This time even Ava put on a face of distaste.

"She might be but I'm not. See, I don't remember the guy who got my mommy pregnant with us." Christ Bex….He doesn't need to know that much…."But I remember my brother. He does everything my daddy was supposed to do. He holds me when I'm scared. He picks me up from school. He even lets me watch TV shows I'm not supposed to sometimes." From where he sat, he waited for a warning from his mother, shocked as ever when she only smiled. "Today, when I asked him if being a daddy to Beth meant he'd forget about me, he told me it wasn't true. Because Mom taught us that more people means more love. Look sir, I know I'm just a stupid kid. And I know that what I just said doesn't mean a whole lot to you. It's not going to change whether or not they get their baby back. But I just had to say something. Because even though he's older, he doesn't talk a whole bunch. Mom's not going to say anything because it's not her baby. Quinn isn't feeling good, so it's up to me. And if you ask me, Noah and Quinn deserve to have their baby back. Because I know he'll do a really good job. I know because I was his baby first." Damn… Even Harold looked shell shocked. So much so he almost didn't notice the tears flowing both mothers' faces. Even Harold looked to be holding his surprise in check. He'd probably never been kicked in the ass by a kid before.

"Well, I'll tell you what. When you're all done with school, you give me a call." The look of confusion that crossed her face broke the adults into steady laughter.

"I don't know what that means…"

"He's saying you'll be a really good lawyer one day," Puck mumbled. After a performance like that, so did he.

"Oh…I don't wanna do that. At least I don't think so. I just want my brother to have his baby back." If that didn't win him over, absolutely nothing would and everyone in the room seemed to know it too.

"I think she answered almost all of the questions I had…"

"She has a way of doing that," he smiled, his face almost cracking under the pressure of inflated pride. I just had a couple more, just to make sure we're all on the same page." Was he kidding? His sister had practically given her first presidential speech. What more did the guy want to hear?

"And why weren't you paying attention, Mr. Puckerman?" Seriously?

"I was stressed from losing our show choir competition and getting like no sleep that night so I was a bit foggy on the whole thing. We still had a month to figure out what we were going to do about Beth but...well that didn't work out," he muttered.

"She was born premature," he said matter of factly. Puck resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the guy. For a person who was supposed to help them figure something out, he wasn't exactly as attentive as he would have hoped.

"Yeah. I was under a lot of pressure to see if Quinn would change her mind at the last minute or something. Would have done anything I could to keep her but it wasn't my choice. I did what I did because I care more about how the mother of my child feels than I do." Even while knowing as much, hearing him say so put a knot in Quinn's chest. "I would get over it. If the shoe was on the other foot, she would never be happy. She would hate me. All we would do is fight about how hard everything is. I didn't want my daughter to grow up like that. My sister and I already did."

"You understand that both parents must sign to make this a legally binding contract, right?"

"Yes and I signed it. I don't remember much from that day but I do remember that."

"Mr. Puckerman from what you're telling me, it sounds like you signed her over under duress."

"Under what?"

"Duress. It means that you were essentially forced or coerced into signing over your rights. If Ms. Fabray hadn't asked you to, would you have offered up your daughter for adoption?"

"If it was up to me, of course not," he said, his lip forming a tight line.

"It was up to you," Harold pointed out. "To make such a life-changing decision, both parents must be in agreement on its outcome."

"I did what she asked me to," he said.

"But had you the time, the proper sleep, and not the added stress of other activities, you would have tried to sway her choices."

"I only did what she wanted."

"But the end result was not what youwanted."

"No sir."

"Mr. Puckerman, as you and your sister so eloquently laid out to me, this is not something you wanted. It is simply something you felt you had to do out of care and concern for the well-being of your child's mother." Somehow, he appreciated Becca's word for it so much more. "Now, that essentially makes this contract incomplete. That's not to say that you've always obtained your rights as a father. It simply means that we go ahead and set this aside." Really, he just wanted to burn the damn thing but he knew that wasn't going to go over well.

"So that means..."

"It means you have obtained full, legal rights to your child." The smile across Puck's face couldn't have spread any wider if he tried. Seeing the boy's expression, Harold brought his hand up. "I need to run a few more things by you. As a specialist in domestic violence-as is stated in the child's file-I must be sure that you have complete understanding of not only your rights but your responsibilities as a caretaker." Wasn't that the whole point of this meeting they were having? If his little sister could lay it out so good, what the hell else did he really need to know?

"I do," he said simply, though sarcasm and wit coated his mouth thickly.

"Do you have a proper and reliable form of income?"

"Yes and my mom has agreed to help out where she can until we can get ourselves figured out." The suited man looked over at the woman in question who offered her agreement. It wasn't exactly anything anybody talked about but considering what she'd learned about the situation, it was safely implied.

"Does anyone in your home take to any form of illegal substances?"

"No," he said, his answer riding on a breath as he kept his cringe as discreet as possible.

"Do you believe that anyone in the home is an immediate danger to the child in question?"

"Of course not," he said, his voice beginning to ride on the edge of frustration earning him a warning glance from his mom.

"Standard procedure," he said.

"With all due respect, Mr. Archer, we're not a danger to our kid. Especially if it's anything compared to what she just got out of. Nothing is worse than that," he said biting his lip.

"I understand your concern. We just have some of our own."

"Well you don't need to have them. I'm a good dad," he said somewhat defensively.

"I do not doubt your abilities, Mr. Puckerman. We have a witness in this room that took it upon herself to plead your case. What she gave me has tremendous weight on my decision." Wasn't this already decided? The contract was incomplete. What more did he have to give them? A limb? A pint of blod?" Puck nodded silently somehow not quite believing the man behind the desk. Then again, at their age, everyone had something to say.

"In cases like these we make sure to be extra cautious."

"I get that but you really don't have to be. I would never..." he trailed feeling sick at the very idea of laying a hand on Beth. He couldn't help the tone he'd fallen into as he spoke now. First Quinn (who had eventually figured out otherwise), and then Shelby who was so clearly in the wrong he couldn't even see straight. And now this guy. He understood the worry but couldn't keep from being slightly offended. He'd spent his whole life being judged and criticized and being enough a man for his daughter...enough man for Quinn was the only place where he felt he did something right for a change.

"From what you've shown me of your determination today, I highly doubt you would," he said in consolation.

"So does that mean we get our kid back now?" He cringed as Quinn kicked him discreetly. Even though she hadn't said a word, her eyes said enough, the glare in them a clear indication that his attitude left a lot to be desired. "Sorry," he mumbled. Harold only offered a curt nod.

"Not so fast. I'm only building up your case. By providing your statement, you're giving us enough to show a judge, who will essentially make the final ruling."

"How long before we can do that?"

"Well, all we really need is a judge willing to review your case so that they can make the final decision. According to what I've read in the file and what you've shared with me today, the next phase should be a breeze. I'll be sure to give you a call when we find one."

"Is there any way we could speed up the process at all?" Ava asked. Howard Archer raised his brow in contemplation.

"We've been dancing this dance for a while," Puck sighed. "The sooner I know that she's home for good, the better we'll sleep. It's already enough of a challenge with the nightmares she has because of what's been done to her." He could feel his jaw tighten at the very thought of Shelby cursing her and her actions. He wanted to do much more to her but seeing as that would land him right along-side the number one problem, he fought the urge.

"I understand. I actually have a few officials in mind. I considered them as I looked all of this over earlier this morning." Puck sighed, quietly taking Beth closer to him to calm his nerves. With her hands now free, Quinn settled one along his leg as they waited.

"Almost done," he whispered, the wind of his whisper bringing Beth's eyes to meet his. A gentle poke of her nose produced a light giggle. Just a few seconds of that washed all expenses from his mind. Besides Ava being incredibly secretive, the man hadn't given them any numbers to work with. Looking up across the desk, he brought himself back to a relatively neutral expression. "Sorry but, I was just wondering how much something like this is going to cost us. Quinn and I are still doing the whole school thing and my mom works a ton of doubles just to…" Confusion sharpened as the older man shook his head.

"This was done free of charge." Free? Nothing in life was free, especially something like the law. "Ms. Rachel Berry discussed the situation with me at length. I've worked alongside her fathers for the last 30 years—"

"Look Harold, you can stop right there. I know what she's trying to do but no. A lot of what our mother taught us went in one ear and out the other with me but honest money was never one of them. Whatever the cost is for a normal consultation, we'll pay it. Please."

"That won't be necessary Mr. Puckerman. All I've done is review your information and reverse a couple of signatures. We won't even be standing up in court. Consider it my free read for the day," he joked. "The Berries are wonderful people. A friend of their daughter's is welcome to my advice at any time." Well damn. Now he owed Berry for the rest of his freaking life. They both did but in her usually eloquent fashion, Quinn would at least try to take it in stride. "Every penny counts," he mumbled, the baby in question too fascinated by the crevices in her father's face to even acknowledge the lawyer at all.

"Thank you," Ava smiled graciously. "Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to help my son.' Harold only nodded, watching his silent client for even a single reaction. Even after five minutes of waiting, she remained wordless, her face completely blank.

"I don't mean to step on any toes but are you absolutely positive in Ms. Fabray's…erm….emotional standing?" Ava Puckerman blanched. For a woman who spent a good portion of her life properly composed, Puck noticed her eyes set small fires.

"Quinn Fabray is an exceptional mother. She's had a couple of bad days but so have the rest of us. I stand by my gratitude, Mr. Archer but if you choose to question my family—"

"Couldn't even wait for us to leave before you started judging," Puck muttered. "You know what, Mom? I think we want somebody else. Rachel has a whole notebook of people who can do a little bit of magic."

"Don't be silly. I was only asking a simple question. A question for the well-being of your daughter." Puck steeled almost instantly, pulling both of his girls in a little bit tighter.

"Insult the mother of my child again and I swear to god you'll wish you hadn't," he muttered through gritted teeth.

"It's not an insult, Mr. Puckerman. I only want to prevent history from repeating itself." Even while holding his gaze steadily, Ava kept her flustered daughter close to her own chest.

"I'll have you know I raised three children virtually on my very own. Two boys for the first eight years." Harold grimaced, though based on his "assessment" none of them were sure if it was out of judgement or being properly impressed.

"I…I'm sorry. I never meant to impose. I just want to be sure that this appropriate arrangement for everyone involved. I hold no reservations for young mothers and fathers. If your daughter is any reflection of this family, you have raised incredibly well-mannered children." Letting the last of his words fade, Puck smirked as he shuffled back his chair in what he could only hope was honest embarrassment for his slew of comments. Ava scowled, trying to fight a dry laugh when she noted how white his knuckles were while he gripped the receiver.

"Yes, thank you." Quietly hanging up, Harold nodded over to the small family in his office. "I requested a rush on your behalf. Judge Garland has a moment after his lunch hour at two. The court house is over on 12th and Main. I'll meet you there as legal support." What support?

"So we just...tell them what we told you? Or is there another hoop we have to jump through?" Any trace of former gratitude had been washed out of his tone completely. Instead Puck was hoping to get the hell out of here as fast as fucking possible. He wanted to be home curled up with his baby and his girlfriend in relative peace, this disaster far behind them.

"No more hoops," he laughed nervously. "The rest is really quite simple. You just need these statements properly authorized and she'll be yours before the ink dries."

"You hear that, Beth? You get to come home. For good," he grinned. Puck's happiness quickly turned to a grimace as she tugged at his ear. "Owwww, that's my ear," he chuckled pulling it away gently. Beth seemed not to mind as his reaction only made her laugh. Hell, could he get used to the sound of that. As angry as the older man made him, her untouched joy was dosed with perfect timing. He rolled his eyes and sighed as they rose to thank Harold for his patience and going the extra mile in the favor. Because up until moments before, he really had done them a solid.

Thankfully the last step didn't take as much work as the first. After briefing and reviewing prior information (and Puck once again having to repeat his stance on the wrongful signing and proper care-all of which made him wish he had the whole conversation recorded), the five were on their way home. As they finally pulled into the driveway, Puck could feel a weight being lifted.

"One less stress," he breathed. "Now there's just about a dozen more to worry about."

"Like finding a job," Ava provided.

"Yeah...that. But I will. I swear I will. She's home and for right now, that's all I'm gonna let myself think about." His mother nodded making her way back into the house, the small family following close behind. Falling back in against the couch, his tie came off in one swift move. "Thatthing's a choking hazard," he mumbled popping his first couple of buttons relieved that he was finally able to breathe. Quinn smiled gently resting her head at his shoulder. "Welcome home, baby," he smiled. "Now who wants lunch?" He laughed quietly at the groan Quinn produced easing her up into standing position. "C'mon. It won't be so bad." Right... "Let's go see if there's anymore waffles. Maybe you'll try one before I put them all in my tummy." The lack of space between bodies worked to the little girl's advantage as she pulled herself toward her mother's chest resting her head in waiting on the pillow of her breasts. "You go on ahead. I'll bring something up."

Once in their room, she all but tore at his shirt, if for no other reason than to hold her daughter as close as humanly possible. Her name fell to an echo against her skin, the eagerness of her grip invited more openly than ever before. While Beth was taking a well-deserved breath, she gently pulled the dress up over her head leaving the little girl in no more than her diaper, the shadows of earlier fabrics still rubbing against her own skin. So my daddy can't hurt you she thought. The happy sigh she managed was likely a preference she took from him, the wiggling of her toes and fingers spreading a small smile across Quinn's face. So much like him.

"Daddy will fix that when he comes back," she whispered. Beth on her part seemed relieved, sticking to her in all the right places while she tugged affectionately. Despite her best effort, Quinn could feel her eyes growing heavy, the steady flow of the baby's breath lulling her to sleep she'd long forgotten. Or at least she would have if Puck's emerging figure wasn't always enough to keep her conscious.

"Hey. You two look much happier. Try not to tell Becca it's because the dress is gone. She sounded really proud of that." Quinn softly rolled her eyes, her nose partially buried in sheets that smelled so much like him. "Are we taking a nap?" Again she nodded. Even after giving up her latest "feed", the blonde let her nipple rest loosely in the baby's mouth, an awareness of each other seemingly enough to keep them both calmer.

"Da…" It sounded slightly jumbled but still he smiled, fingers pressed gently into her stomach. While it first started as a way to calm her nerves, it seemed to have a calming effect that now helped ease her excitement. Moments later, he watched her eyes begin to close, though she clung to Quinn blindly.

"Not sure you wanna be like that the whole time," he chuckled gently pulling her fingers loose. Even while she found her sleep, Quinn's hand rested quietly on the little girl's belly, her eyes swimming with emotion that didn't quite come down her face.

"I'm not crazy…" He blinked, Harold's voice a quiet accusatory tone that made his blood simmer. "I'm scared…" As short as they were, phrases like that hadn't left her mouth in days. Despite hesitating her way through them, he dared to check her eyes for life, every muscle in his body throbbing at the sight of it.

"Welcome back." Coming from anyone else, she would look on in confusion, panicked with the thought that she'd made a mess of herself while quietly being judged for it. Puck just seemed glad to see her, his tone reminding her yet again of his patience and warmth.

"Hi…."

"Of course you're not," he mumbled. Sliding in a body length away from her, he carefully brought her shirt back up. "That guy didn't know what the hell he was talking about. He was just looking for something to say. You're going to be amazing. You already are. Look." Redirecting her attention, she smiled. "I don't know about you but I'm pretty sure this is the best looking baby in Ohio." Despite herself, Quinn blushed.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say that's some kind of pat on the back," she laughed. "She looks nothing like me." Still, she knew what he meant. Her contribution would likely come through in personality.

"You know what that means though, right? She's going to make my life a living hell." Quinn grimaced, realizing how true a statement that really was. "Did I say it was a bad thing? This just means we're going to have to try again," he teased. That set her skin on fire. It was no secret that he wanted another baby one day. What almost always caught her off guard was his use of "we". When the time came, he wanted her baby.

"Ten months wasn't enough punishment for you?" she joked. Puck softly shook his head.

"We did that…" he said wistfully. "We made that. You and me. No way am I changing anything. Unless you have a problem with it." The sudden thought put at least a dozen variations of hesitation in him.

"I'm a mess, Noah…An absolute disaster. Not just when I'm pregnant. How many days have I been…?"

"Just a day." Comparatively that was virtually nothing. They both knew that she'd done much worse in the past. "And you know what? I know it's not easy. I know it frustrates the hell out of you. But this thing you do? I can handle it. We can handle it. If you checking out is the only real reason you won't have a baby with me, I got this." Almost the entire time he spoke, Quinn's heart practically jumped from her chest. He clearly wasn't going to take no for an answer. At least not without circling the topic until she got dizzy enough.

"We can't now but…since we're here. Since I'm…me. Maybe we can…what we talked about yesterday."

"I would have to go give the baby to my mom. I don't think she wants to be around for that."

"Puck, I just want you to touch me," she clarified. "This isn't….Not yet."

"I know. I'll be back in a few minutes. Hopefully she stays out. Did you want me to bring you anything?"

"Anything." All she really cared about was the fact that she was being eaten from the inside out. One of many reasons she hated this setback every damn time it happened. Food went beyond an afterthought. Winding up even tighter once he left, she sighed, slowly inching his tshirt up over her head, daring to brush her own skin while she waited. He deserves to come back to something special. Upon his return Puuck looked on curiously, his eyes flickering between the forgotten shirt on his bedroom floor and the implication beyond his sheets.

"Hey," he murmured, the sound of such a simple word making her throat dry with anticipation. Gently rolling her onto her stomach, he worked to set her loose before settling into a soft hover. With more life in her eyes than he had probably ever seen before, he let her look him over, tensing on her gaze alone. "What can I do for you, babe?" Biting her lip, her tongue running over her lip as she considered such a question. There was absolutely nothing about him she could bring herself to keep hating or disliking at all.

"I…I want everything," she whispered hoarsely, surprising even herself with how foreign they felt in her mouth. "I want to feel pretty. I wanna be able to feed my baby. I need to know I'm going to be a good mom…" Before she could think up anything more, his lips found hers. They could start working on at least two of those right now. Quinn met him with an urgency he didn't quite expect, nearly as frantic as Puck himself usually was. Nibbling on her lower lip with a gentle pull, his mouth inched the length of her neck, her voice box vibrating just enough to bring a knowing smile across his face. Stopping at her collarbone, his breath was warm against her skin, just enough to make her shiver. "Noah…" she gasped, goosebumps rising along every inch of her body.

"Yeah baby?" he whispered, shaping butterflies along her chest with fleeting kisses. Incapable of viable words, her hands found his shaved head, the feeling of skin leaving her to wish for just a moment that he had something to sink them into.

"Twist hard," she breathed, fully convinced that the harder she shook, the more like herself she would hopefully feel. The fact that it would prove just how much he wanted her was an equally viable reason. Down at her hips, he almost bellowed with laughter. What an invitation. Tugging lightly at her navel, he let his tongue work the remaining distance to her breasts where he set himself in preparation. "Okay…" Gripping her nipple, he grinned, his attempt to nearly turn it over rattling almost every one of her nerves. "Oh my god…."

"Feels good, right?" She wasn't exactly sure yet. What she did know was that she wanted more of that feeling. The only one that seemed to take her out of her own body long enough to feel free. "Again?" he asked softly. The soft nod brought her fingers deep into his shoulder blades in preparation.

"Again…" Brushing her stomach with the back of his fingers, he nipped at the edge of her breast, trapping it with his lips. "Okay…" she sighed, her breath sharp as she sailed up and out of her skin. One last draw of breath laid her out in exhausted exhilaration. Resting his head lightly on her chest, he grinned, every inch of him realizing just how much he still needed her.

"I missed you so much, babe." Quinn nodded, tears gathering in her own eyes with the amount of time that had really passed without his touch. Soft kisses did what they could to dry her eyes,. "Too much?" Before she could even process an entire thought, she shook her head frantically.

"I miss you…." she admitted, the heat between her thighs making her blush. If either of them had any sense, they both knew sex was out of the question. At least for the time being. But there was so much she needed him to understand….

"I miss you too," he sighed inching his sweats off of her hips.

"We shouldn't…" she warned, though she wasn't about to tell him to cover anything back up.

"We really shouldn't…I mean, I could put one on but that…."

"No more lies," she mumbled.

"It's not so much a lie as…making sure we do this thing one kid at a time." Quinn nodded, disappointment clear in her expression. If he knew her at all, none of it had anything to do with him. "Q, it's okay to want sex. That's supposed to be normal." She nodded. As right as he was, the voices still found time to ring in her head.

"H-How much do you love me?" she asked pathetically. If he wasn't already so used to answering it, the question would've made him laugh.

"You want me to show you?" No matter how she'd asked for it, his response buried her head in his shoulder in a weak attempt to hide. "Because I can do that. Whenever you need to hear it." Puck was easily the only one capable of keeping such a promise, the dedication shown to her in every possible way.

"Right now?" she mumbled. Shuffling through his nightstand, he eased a kiss to the corner of her mouth while pressing the package into her hand. Shuffling out of his dress pants, lightly painted nails worked through his boxers, the idea suddenly coming to light deepening a red that somehow managed to stay in her skin. "Take your time…" Finally revealing their final obstacle, Quinn pressed a soft kiss to his tip. Falling back into the bed, Puck carefully eased between her legs, pulling them apart just enough that they both managed to line up against each other. "Please love me, Noah…"

---

Quinn shuffled out into the living room, blearing-eyed. From where she stood on the staircase, she could smell her mom's cooking as it wafted from the kitchen. She had to wonder if what she smelled was made with the woman's own two hands or something premade, like it always seemed to be. She opted for the second most logical explanation trying not to be as disappointed as she secretly felt. Pulling her housecoat closer to her body, she quietly descended. As she made her way into the kitchen, taking her place at the table, a well-practiced smile made its way across her face.

"Good morning Mom," she said brightly. Judy turned, now aware that she wasn't alone.

"Morning, Quinnie," she replied. Now that her eyes were well-adjusted, she realized she had been wrong. On one of her rare occasions, her mother would take meals into her own hands. She figured she might as well drink this all in. It would probably be another month before she saw her standing at the stove again. Unlike every other instance Judy looked content to be there. To say this was surprising to Quinn would be an understatement. Trying her best to suppress a yawn, she let her eyes close more tightly than they would naturally. If by the time they opened and she was presented with an overly extravagant meal prepped with all the trimmings, then this was real enough. She almost hoped that it would. There was a comfort in the familiar. No matter how disappointing it initially was. At least then she'd know she was in the right house.

"Smells good," she smiled. Judy grinned brightly obviously pleased with herself. She had to commend her on the effort, the extra mile, no matter what her reasons for taking it might actually be. Maybe for just a moment she could pretend they were your typical Lima family. It was a bit of a stretch and Quinn knew it. But the scene before her looked too good not to let her imagination go on a bit of a run.

"I hope you don't mind a bit of bacon. I think I made a bit too much," she smiled. Quinn raised her brow curiously. Judy was either playing with her or genuinely unaware. Either way, she'd take it. She decided that a nod was sufficient enough an answer.

"Can I help with anything?" she asked. Her mother turned back toward the stove before she spoke.

"There's a selection of fresh fruit that can be sliced and served up if you don't mind," she said pleasantly. She nodded, already pulling out a knife and taking it to a quarter of fresh watermelon. "This is nice. I'm not sure I remember the last time we did something like this." I was nine she thought. The grin in Judy's voice was palpable.

"I don't know. A while I think," she shrugged. There was no point in getting technical about it. She would just deny the timeline anyway, like they avoided just about everything else.

"We should certainly do this more often," she decided taking out a serving plate and sliding a set of pancakes on it.

"That would be nice," she supplied. There was nothing if very little more she could add to the topic. Her mother would forget even mentioning it by next week, making some good and valid excuse about lack of time and a busy schedule. The subject was just as easily as easily closed as it had been opened.

"I've missed you, Quinnie," Judy admitted. Quinn froze, not even sure where this was going. She hadn't exactly gone anywhere. She'd been here. This was just one of those rare occasions where her mother was aware of the things coming out of her mouth. Or maybe she wasn't. No matter what the truth of it was to say that she was once again surprised by the woman's confession was a little bit more than obvious, though she refused to show it.

"I've missed you too, Mom," she said tentatively. For a minute, she almost hated this version of her mom. Everything she said and did was such a put on that there was really no way around it. Her sober self was in want of so many things that she'd later forget even wanting in the first place. "What's the occasion?" she asked. The sound of her half-hearted laugh made Quinn turn around, knife still bin hand.

"Well you see, I was a bit of a goof and Mother's Day just flew right over my head." Quinn could feel her stomach begin to twist. If there was one day of the year she'd never soon forget it was that one.

"It's fine, Mom. We don't usually do much for it anyway," she reasoned.

"And that's becoming more and more of a problem," she sighed. "We hardly do very much together anymore as it is. You're getting older and I'm sure the last thing you want is to be seen with your old mom," she said sadly. Quinn had to bite down on the words that begged to spill out of her mouth. If her mom was suggesting that she learn how to drink, that was out of the question.

"We're just busy, Mom, it's fine," she said.

"My baby's growing up," she smiled. Yeah…

"Have to at some point, right?" Judy just nodded. As she came toward her daughter, the woman's arms came to rest around her hip. Eyeing her skeptically, Quinn leaned stiffly into her mother's touch. She frowned when she took note of her body language.

"I know I've upset you, Quinnie. That was not my intention. I'm sorry, honey."

"I know. It's okay. It's over. All we can do now is move on, right?"

"I suppose you're right about that," she said quietly. It didn't take long for her o notice the layered meaning in the older woman's words.

"I'm going to change, Quinnie. He's long gone and it's time I…"

Got it together?

"I know," she said. Judy provided her daughter one last smile and a kiss to her forehead before turning back to her pancakes. Swallowing hard, Quinn turned to her own cutting board slicing a handful of strawberries, taking one in her mouth as she worked. "These are good," she said.

"Aren't they?" she said proudly. Again she just nodded. "They're the freshest ones the store had on hand." Quinn readily ignored her mom's little tangent, her mind turning elsewhere, as much as she wished it wouldn't. Beth's small and angelic face filled her eyes and it took everything in her not to shower the fruit she was cutting with her salty tears. She wasn't going to do this. Not today. There was no place for things like this. She was going to have a nice quiet brunch with her mom and that would be it. She would drink this in for all that it was, no matter the circumstance or motive. She'd take it in and enjoy it, fully aware that by sundown she'd already be long gone. As ready as she was for a few seconds of normalcy, there was no closing the gaping hole that settled in her heart.

Her body seemed to betray her then as her vision blurred. She wasn't even aware of how badly until the knife's blade ran a short line along her knuckle. The sight of it quickened the flow, forcing her to use the counter to keep her balance. Judy must have heard, as she was quick to run over with a few napkins and a band aid.

"What in the world…."

"I'm sorry," she whispered. Her mother met her saddened expression with rare concern.

"That's not what I'm talking about, dear. Cuts are cuts. Knives can be nasty little things. The tears….This was supposed to make you happy…" she said disappointedly.

"I am. I'm really happy, Mom," she said quickly whipping at her eyes.

"Then why don't I believe it?" she mumbled. Quinn took a breath trying to ready herself for the words that seemed to demand release from her mouth.

"I miss her…" All at once it seemed to click, as Judy's face grew hard.

"Oh Quinnie…You're such a pretty girl. One day…One day you'll find a man who loves you, just as much as I do. There's no need to rush any of it. It all comes with time."

"But it happened…."

"Yes and you've solved the problem. It's time you push forward with your life. There will be more to come."

"Beth isn't a problem," she said quietly.

"A blip in judgment. Quite poor if I do say so myself. But you're young. You learn."

"She's not a blip. She's a little girl. My little girl and I miss her," she whispered through silent tears.

"No sweetie. That's what adoption means. You love her enough to let her go to someone who can give all the things that you can't. It's commendable."

"Just because I did doesn't mean I forgot. It's Mother's Day…I'm a mom. He says I'll always…"

"Noah doesn't know what he's saying, honey. Men hardly do. Come now, the pancakes are getting cold." It was only as her mother turned her back that Quinn realized how much had made its way to the floor. Small puddles surrounded her as she used her strength not to be physically sick. She had to close her eyes to keep from staring at the puddles before her. As some of it kissed the tip of her robe, she let out a shattering scream that turned Judy's attention immutably. "What in the world are going on about now?" she sighed. "Oh my Lord. Give me the knife Quinn. You've already cut yourself once," she said gently, tenderly removing the utensil from her daughter's hold. "So disappointing….You can't even sit down with your own mother, so consumed with that which you can't change….Breaks my heart."

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I made a mistake….A beautiful mistake…."

"Yes you did, dear. She's beautiful…Just like you."

"A mistake…" Judy just sighed shaking her head.

"And to think I taught you better. But there's no changing anything now. All we can do is handle the world and our lives with what it's become. Step away from the counter, honey. You're going to be covered in blood…" Swallowing hard, she nodded stepping over the pool in front of her. She had to wait only a minute after sitting at the table for the blade that was taken from her to find its way in front of her. "These strawberries aren't quite small enough…"

"I'm sorry…" Those two words seemed to be the only ones left in her throat.

"No matter, you just have to fix it," she said sliding the bowl over to her daughter. Quinn slowly nodded wasting no time to do as she was told. All it took was one before her finger was sliced once more, this time the gash deeper than the one left on her knuckle.

"So disappointed….disappointed...disappointed."

---

Quinn sat bolt upright, her heart hammering in her throat. The same dream in various ways for the last two weeks. As much as she tried to rein it in, the scream that spilled from her lips rang through the room. In only an instant the bedside lamp was turned on and she was met with Puck's crazy eyes. It took him only a second to remember that Beth rested against him, as she had done without change for the last two weeks. Hearing her daughter's cry, Quinn's head spun in her direction, reaching frantically for her.

"Hang on, Q, you're shaking. Give yourself a minute," he whispered bringing himself closer to her. He was only met with an immediate shake of her head, just as determined to take her baby close. Puck sighed running his fingers through Beth's hair as he settled Quinn's hand on her stomach. Seeing the little girl visibly relax, likely from having them both there made her sigh with relief. "There….Much better. You still wanna take her?" She was just as quick to shake her head now. She'd just make everything worse. She always made everything worse. "She's good now. You're calmer….She'd like that," he said softly. As tempting as it sounded, as much as she wanted to, there was no telling what her hands would do to Beth. They were already covered in blood. Her daughter was nice and clean as per her father's patience. She wasn't going to mess that up. She'd already done her share.

"Wet," she whispered.

"Yeah, she probably needs a fresh diaper, you're right," he said sliding quietly out of bed. He didn't have to look back to know that Quinn's eyes were watching his every move eagerly. Even as she followed his leaving, she couldn't help but swell with only a shadow of pride. Even if that wasn't entirely what she meant. When she clarified or he found out, there was no telling how upset he'd be. As neutral as the dream was, there was something eerie about it, even terrifying as Judy closed in on her. The blood. Always the blood. As much as she tried to shuffle out of bed, she sat frozen, afraid to look at the floor below. She would probably be stepping in more of it if she wasn't careful and that would just make everything all the more real. Even as she let herself be grateful for it, her throat turned to sandpaper as she watched him with their daughter.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly. Turning to her, he shrugged.

"I wouldn't have figured it out as quickly if you didn't point it out," he said. She knew he wasn't serious. A wet diaper wasn't rocket science. What would be though was finding a way to the laundry room on legs that refused to work. He didn't need to add her to his plate. She was the adult here.

"Big girl," she mumbled, her eyes pooling with fresh tears.

"Huh?" It didn't take him long to turn and face her seeing what sat in front of him.

"Accident….I'm sorry," she barely managed before tears could spill over. Her mother wasn't the only one disappointed in her. As if Quinn couldn't hate herself anymore than she already did. She had to. She really, really had to. No blood. She didn't want blood. The fear that sent every part of her body over the edge left her there to stir in her own…The realization pulled a sob from the pit of her stomach. Judy was right. There was no room for a child. Not like this. Hearing her distress, Puck rushed over.

"What?" She'd said all of that before. She'd repeated it for two weeks straight. No matter how often he tried to reassure her, the words and pain in her tone never changed.

"All over…Blood….Was bad…Not good," she whimpered clinging to his sleeve.

"What's all over?" he mumbled pulling matted hair behind her ear.

"Mess…He's gonna be mad….Please don't be mad. Was an accident…I'll do better. Promise. Don't be mad…" Puck bit his lip as he put two and two together surrounding Beth before turning his attention to her mother.

"Shh, we got this," he said softly, wondering for the hundredth time in days just what could put her in such a frazzled place in her head. "Can you stand for me?" That request alone shrunk her back further. Didn't he know the floor was covered in blood? Why would she want to step in it? "Alright, come here," he sighed letting her arms wrap tightly around his neck. "Sit here for a minute and try to relax. I'm going to go get the—"

"Baby…." Puck nodded brushing his lips along her forehead. Even as he left, Quinn tried everything she could to melt the ice between her bones. When nothing seemed to happen, no matter how often and how harshly she tried to free her muscles, the tears came faster. Her mom had never been so right. She couldn't do anything for herself. When he returned, she watched him with a surge of panic. He'd come back without their daughter. "My baby…."

"Sissy's got her for a little bit. I promise she's okay." Even while being reassured, she couldn't stop her hands from shaking. "Want help?" Quinn could only nod as the tears spilled over her cheeks. As he slipped the socks off her feet, he saw them go stiff as she attempted to bring them closer to her body. "Just a minute," he said helping her stand. Even as she stood, leaning all of her weight onto him, there was no telling how much smaller she would allow herself to become. Only now was she aware of the slight breeze that only bare skin would allow her to feel. Where were all of her clothes? He was supposed to keep her safe.

"No," she whined burying her face further in his shoulder.

"You're okay. There's no clothes." It was at times like these that Puck was more than grateful for his mother's profession. He'd learned to practice patience with his sister but this demanded a completely different frame of mind. What she'd woken from was not the first of her nightmares, each scare making her wet the bed more often than not. "Just hang out here for a minute and I'll go put on some new sheets. If we're lucky, they're still warm."

"No," she choked, her nails clawing at him desperately. Every time he touched anywhere it hurt like nothing else. Consciously she knew that Puck would never….At the same time, he had no idea where hands had been and she wasn't going to scream bloody murder for him. She'd already done it once, probably making him feel like the worst person ever. He wasn't anything like that. If there was one person who never made her feel like less than she was, it was Puck. She hadn't said a word to him and he still behaved as if he understood everything she wanted to say and equally never said at all.

"I'll go ahead and start the shower so you can hop right in. I'll be back in just a minute, alright? Do you have to go?" he asked carefully. Might as well get that out of the way. Not anymore she thought, remembering what she left in the room, the thought coloring her cheeks a harsh red.

"No," she mumbled, a light shiver traveling her spine.

"Your legs working now?" he mumbled. That much she wasn't sure of but she found herself nodding anyway. Even if she had to stagger her way over. Puck's arm wrapped around her waist as he helped her step inside. "Shower?" Again she nodded. Quinn wasn't sure how the standing part of it would work out but it was better than sitting in a pool of more blood. "It's going to start cold," he warned. Better than too hot. Just before he let the curtain fall closed, her hand wrapped tightly around his wrist.

"Don't go," she whispered meekly. The last thing she needed was to be left alone while all her own crimson circled the drain. As the water cascaded down her body, she had to keep her eyes closed to keep her head straight. Knowing where her memory tended to wander, she would likely see things that would just make the whole thing worse. Even as she tried to still her shaking legs, the water hitting her skin spilled quiet cries from her mouth. She hated how petty this whole situation made her. Puck didn't need to put up with two of them; small incapable children who couldn't do a single thing on their own. Beth had every excuse in the world. Quinn was just stupid. Stupid to let something like this get to her.

It wasn't like he hit her deliberately. She'd always earned them. He'd hide them well and keep them small so at least she wasn't reminded. But the truth of the matter was that every inch of her was coated in ghost and as hard as she tried, there would be no getting rid of them. With Puck waiting for her outside, patient as he'd always been with her, no matter how much bitch she served him, he wouldn't come. He'd never think to cross Puck, no matter how much younger he was. Touching him in any way would just disgust her father. For that shallow thought alone, for the moment, she was more than grateful.

"He always comes," she whimpered, month old gashes along her calves dancing their evil. Puck frowned slipping in behind her as quietly and carefully as possible so as not to scare her more.

"He won't come," he whispered squeezing the hand she took, which he couldn't help but notice was rather immediate. Despite how conflicted she was about his words, she nodded. If she had to believe anyone, it might as well have been him. Even if she really didn't.

"He'll see….He's gonna yell….Things break…"

"I'll take care of it before he sees," he said. He knew by that afternoon out in the rain that most of this was just playing along. The only way to go was to follow her frame of mind until she was done. "He won't touch you, Quinn, I swear."

"He does it…a lot." Puck only had to wait a beat before she continued. "Bad words….Bad words for a bad girl."

"You're not bad."

"He always smells funny. Like fire. Sometimes he smells like old grapes. And his hands…They're big….Really big." Puck could feel his own fire building as he tried to keep from throwing up in his mouth. If she said what she said next the way she was going to say it… "He's hard…His hands…They're hard." He let out a visible sigh as she trailed to something minutely safer. "They're all over….'Cause Quinnie's bad….Quinnie made lots of mistakes. Quinnie made a big one…Had a baby. Those aren't allowed. Not yet…Not like how I did."

"I know," he mumbled. For only a moment, he scolded himself for what he'd done to her but was quick shut that part of himself down to focus on what was saying.

"Told him to go. That he shouldn't be there. He shouldn't have to watch." Puck knew he had to tie the pronouns to get her from one thought to the next. He still hadn't properly thanked his friend for the saving he'd done. "While he was in the bathroom, Daddy made me take everything and go. His hands….everywhere. Lots of yelling too….I was a mistake. Val's good. Val doesn't make messes. She's a big girl. Allowed to have babies 'cause she's good." Puck found himself struggling with the question he wanted so badly to ask. Had the bastard hurt his daughter? How much did he do to compromise her fragile life?

"The wall…It hurt. He's strong. He smelled like old grapes again. He tried to…the baby." By now he's been listening to her through the shower long enough to make out every word, the last few sending him into a frenzy. "But he didn't. I hugged my belly….She was safe. Promise she was safe." Puck found he could swallow again, that little confession enough to keep his head from turning nightmarish thoughts. "Daddy didn't take her. He wanted to but he didn't." Puck felt her let go of his hand now, the finally sinking into the empty tub. Quietly he came up behind her, the mist of the shower head soaking him further on his way down. "I did good….Made a mistake but I did good," she mumbled as he shuffled her back against him.

"You did good, sweetheart. So good," he whispered wishing he could give her the appreciation she clearly never got for her strength. It took everything in him to keep the knot in his throat from exploding. When it's not one, it might as well be both he thought, quiet tears toying at the edge of his eyes. The water continued running as Quinn finally dissolved in his arms, her entire body quaking as she clung to Puck for dear life. "Shh," he murmured holding her to him as tightly as she could without hurting her.

"I like when you touch…It makes me smile. They don't hurt. They make it better," she mumbled. As much as he fought with himself on the topic, the question came tumbling out as quietly as he would allow it. It was likely a no but the way she described all of it, any of it, made him wonder and he had to be sure.

"Did he ever touch what I touched?" Quinn had to stop and think for a minute. Puck had touched a lot of things, everything really. But the way he asked it, he sounded so scared. The Puck she knew was hardly afraid of anything. And then it hit her, the idea making her heave as she tried not to gag. In no realm of possibility was that even an option.

"With Mama," she whispered. Alright well, if that was all the answer he was going to get, he'd have to be okay with it. "They do what we did," she said carefully. "Just you get to touch there. Daddy's not allowed there. It's wrong." Puck himself could barely nod, trying not to feel a sense of pride at her confirmation. "Was an accident….I didn't mean to."

"I know," he said softly, not entirely sure how much of an umbrella term that was. She'd confessed to a lot of things today already, as well as over the last few days.

"He can't come. Please don't let him come…."

"He won't, I promise," he mumbled pressing a kiss to her forehead. The simple brush along her skin seemed to be her unraveling as one touch brought the pain back full force as it tumbled from her lips. All Puck could do was hold her as the shower soaked them both clear through.

When her breathing finally evened out, his fingers found and traced lightly along the lining of her stomach. As he made his rounds, he had to wonder just where Russell thought to execute his twisted plan. She flinched for only a moment as he circled, her muscles tightening as he came to rest just below.

"That….He touched that. He touched it lots."

"Can I make it better?" Quinn nodded slowly, not entirely sure how he planned to do that but trusting him enough to know that it probably would. A hand rested at her stomach as his lips lightly grazed her underbelly with his lips making her shiver. He smiled broadly as her skin surfaced with gooseflesh.

"He left. I don't know when he's coming back but he left."

"Good. If he comes back, he won't be there for long," he promised. He felt Quinn go stiff again, immediately regretting his choice of words. "On your skin," he clarified.

"Oh…Good. Don't go. I know I did some bad but I'll do better. I won't have accidents anymore…Or try…There's just so much blood. Everywhere."

"Well, good news is, you won't find any here," he said.

"It's in the bed…On the floor."

"We'll fix it," he said. At his words, watery eyes met his gaze, fueled with hope that he was right. He had to be. He somehow always was. Puck was the safest of places she'd ever known. As long as she stayed here, she could almost believe that nothing would touch her.

"Water's getting cold," he pointed out reaching up and over to turn it off. The silence that fell when the water stopped made her all too aware of where she was. Who held her was too much a comfort to be an issue. He'd seen her like this countless times before. Alright well, at least three and done absolutely nothing to her in the last two. As much as she wished to thank him for his tolerance, the words just wouldn't come. It was almost as though the running water provided a necessary barrier between her reality and anything that stood outside of it, even if that one thing was Puck.

"Back to bed?" Quinn just nodded ice cold now. Watching her shiver, he slid the curtain back and wrapped the towel tightly around her. "Better?" he mumbled. Again she shook her head yes as his lips found her shoulder. Stepping out first, he was relieved to see that Beth was still out. "Apocalypse couldn't wake that kid," he muttered. "Can you stand?" Quinn slowly nodded, inching out of the shower. When she hit dry land, she could feel her legs turn to jelly. She'd been sitting too long. Thankfully he caught her as she fell forward. "Good?" His only reply was a set of small arms wrapping around him as she inched forward. After a moment, she released him, finally able to hold her own. The moment she did, there was emptiness that consumed her and she couldn't help but make a beeline for the room.

"There's blood." Apparently, that's what they were calling it now. Puck nodded easily peeling the soiled sheets off the bed. As she watched him work, guilt and embarrassment consumed her once more. Puck was kind enough a person not to speak about it but that almost made it worse. "I'm sorry…"

"It's an easy fix. These need to be thrown in anyway, no matter what happened." He wondered if she remembered having had sex just moments before. To his surprise it had become quite frequent, each sharing of bodies beginning with an attempt to stimulate her enough to keep a happy baby.

Quinn could feel an obvious catch in her throat at how easily he took to her mistakes. He wasn't angry, even when he had all the right to be. Best of all, no matter what she did, his hands were never hard. As fresh sheets came across the bed, she approached them carefully, making sure that it was free of any blood that could have carried over. "It's gone," he said. Quinn returned with a smile of thanks. When he presented her with a set of his own clothes, fresh from the drier, she barely cared as the toel pooled at her feet. "You doin' it?" She answered by way of taking the clothes quickly from his hands. She had to work fast if they were going to stay warm. "You can sit, it's okay. Don't want your legs giving out." When she was finally fully dressed she scampered into the bed, quick to pull the blanket around her. It always seemed to smell like him and that was a comfort all its own. Shuffling out long enough to relieve his sister, he smiled when he saw how cocooned she was.

When he didn't seem to follow her enthusiasm, she frowned, all the question in her eyes. "We're coming," he promised, sliding Beth between them before taking his own space. Cooing softly, the little girl curled up tightly against her mother, her lips wrapped loosely around her breast, the determined tug taking some effort.

"Still looking for the good stuff, huh?" Despite knowing that the baby only did so in search of comfort, her heart gave out with a new wave of guilt. "Hopefully soon. We can't give you a baby brother just yet. That would be a lot faster…" Resting the tips of his fingers against her belly, he rode the soft rise and fall of her breath, a soft song slipping out of her mouth on occasion. "I'm going to have to cut you off in a minute so Mama can sleep."

"Safe…."

"Yeah, you're safe," he confirmed, a quiet kiss brought to the tips of her fingers. Gently rolling her daughter over, she carefully laid her on her father's chest, tiny nails finding their places along his skin.

"Dada," she breathed. The fact that she knew any difference while drifting through states of sleep would never stop throwing him off. At seventeen months she should not already be this aware of…anything.

"You really are your mama's baby," he smiled. Quinn tiredly rolled her eyes. It didn't take a high IQ to realize when you were safe and protected. The average little girl could sense her daddy for miles.

"Safe," she mumbled as she rested her head on his shoulder, shaping his other arm around her.

"Yeah, I can do both," he said.

"Both," she mumbled.

"You did so good, sweet girl. So good." Puck knew he owed his daughter's life to her mother but tonight gave him a dozen new reasons to do so. He still had no idea what the true implication of her mantra was but he'd discovered things that were just as valuable, just as important. He wondered if the running water had anything to do with it and just how much of it they would need to free of her such a burden. If he thought her brave before, this just made her a genuine hero in his eyes. She just smiled tiredly, curling herself up to him as close as she possibly could before finally letting her eyes close. As her breathing even out, Puck watched for a moment in absolute silence trailing light kisses along her jaw before letting his eyes close, allowing them to flow with tears that would never see the light of day, so long as he could help it. How she was still standing he would never really know. "Mama's made of steel," he whispered watching Beth's eyes grow heavy as she joined her mother in sleep.

If Puck felt responsible then, the duty to be sure that nothing so much as breathed their names had just inflated ten times over.

---

His eyes opened wide hours later when he noticed Beth perched on his chest, clapping a hand over it to get his full attention. Recalling the exact same position days before with his mother, he wondered if her wake up routine was some kind of Puckerman practice.

"Please tell me you just woke up," he grumbled, the thought of being watched creeping him out a bit.

"Dada up," she grinned. Yes, Daddy was just waking up. Beth's mood gave him a very different answer in regard to her consciousness. "Up, up, up…." Puck rolled his eyes. The word hadn't left her mouth until now and still he knew they would probably be hearing it all day.

"Alright, alright…" he sighed sliding out just enough to send her into the comforter, the little girl giggling on impact. "You're a morning person, aren't you?" Though his words were completely lost on her, the smile stayed put, a brush of his finger along her belly bringing out the familiar sound. "I'm definitely not going to need an alarm clock anymore," he chuckled, her bright smile being all the motivation he needed. Kissing her collarbone softly, he smirked when her eyes fluttered open, relieved when he found Quinn looking through them. "Morning princess."

"So tired…." she whined. "You go, I'll sleep." Puck softly shook his head. As much as he would like to let her, Ava liked to see them all at breakfast before they all parted ways for the day. A tradition that sometimes annoyed him but after everything, he found himself embracing it more often.

"You know she wants to see you," he mumbled pulling at the ends of her hair.

"Mama up!" Pulling herself into sitting positon, the blonde rolled her eyes.

"Why does that one have to be next?" she groaned, despite the smile that nearly broke her face in half.

"She's a Puckerman," he said proudly. "Kid knows how to be a pain in your butt." The comment sent a pillow sailing right for his head. "Okay, okay we get it. Let's head down before my sister starts jumping on the bed."

"Sometimes I feel like your mom is the most respectful of our sleep…" Puck nodded, though they both knew that any "respect" existed because the nurse hardly got any of her own. "Where's my sweater?"

"You mean mine?" he teased shaking it out and tossing it in her direction.

"And what the hell happened to my pants?"

"Those are right…here," he smirked his expression telling her everything she never asked. "No sex….Just boobs," he added quickly.

"Puck if you're just playing with my breasts, I should still be wearing my pants…." she said with frustration.

"I'm not the one who took them off," he pointed out. The reminder worked to bring almost everything back from the night before, her face on fire.

"In front of the baby?! God Puck."

"Are you kidding me? Beth hung out with my mom for that part. Once you'd had a few minutes I went back for her. And then you woke up again so I left her with Becca for a few minutes. I woke up to her staring into my soul. She probably brought her in before she went down. I wouldn't do anything in front of my kid. I'm stupid, not stupid." Noting the tone changes she immediately felt guilty. She'd said that about him so many times it seemed to be the one thing he ever used to prove his competence anymore.

"I didn't say it like that," she mumbled. "I just…God…I never thought I would like sex that much." Puck visibly brightened, both of them knowing that he would ever be the only one. Not necessarily his call so much as hers. Not that he was complaining at all. "I just…I'm terrible….Absolutely awful."

"Ummm…I really don't think so but…" Again she flushed, frustrated to be interpreted like that, even if they had done it almost daily for nearly a week.

"Can you focus for like a minute?" she growled. "Your mother is just starting to like me. The last thing I want her to think is that I'm addicted to sex…"

"She already knows that I am," he teased. "If she can still look at me at the end of the day, I don't think you have to worry about Mom liking you. Hell, she lets us share a bed. About a week ago she even implied that there's going to be more babies…"

"Oh my god…" she whined. "She knows…."

"Quinn, she knows I love you," he corrected. "She knows I'm in love with you," he whispered in a rare moment of vulnerability. The blonde whipped her head back, knowing she had yet to hear such words come out of his mouth.

"What?" As much as they both knew it about one another, the words still hadn't been said on either side.

"You heard me. I'm in love with you, Quinn Fabray." As surprising as they were to hear, she couldn't bring herself to ask for a repeat, just to be sure her mind wasn't in fact playing the cruelest of jokes at her expense. "I have been for years…" This was new. Not even his glances gave that much away. "Remember that tree smack in the middle of the park down the street?" Quinn thought for a minute, the memory completely lost on her. "I uh….I left you something in it when we were like…ten."

"I was nine," she corrected, trying hard to think if she had ever noticed anything of significance about one of hundreds of trees. When it finally dawned on her, it took every nerve not to cover her face as if she'd been slapped. "You….You carved into it…"

"Our initials," he clarified, blushing despite all of his usual bravado. "It was…It was really dumb. But that's where I saw you for the first time…It's actually the first time you ever said anything nice to me," he mumbled. Quinn wasn't sure which part of his confession left her more amazed. The fact that he clamed to be in love with her for almost seven years or the idea that he was willing to share any of this with anyone, especially her.

"And then I ruined it…" she sighed. "Noah I…I don't know what to say…"

"There's nothing to say," he shrugged. "You showed me. You gave me a beautiful little girl when I hardly deserved a cookie out of your lunchbox," he mused. "I…Quinn I've missed you….The real you. The girl who makes me so happy I want to jump off the roof of my house screaming it. And I know we can't do this all the time. Really, we only get to try anything when she's down for a good two hours. But when we do…When it's actually just you and me…I remember why did all of this…It was a year from the ninth circle of Hell but I remember why I put my name on that stupid piece of paper."

"Can we not talk about that?" she asked nervously. When Beth was placed gently in her lap, her arms came around her in the most natural flow of motions.

"Mama up!" she sang, the demand almost taking out her right ear while she smacked at her chest for emphasis.

"I'm up, I'm up," she laughed. "Daddy's talking," she whispered. "Can we be quiet?

"Up!" she repeated impatiently.

"The lady wants what the lady wants," he mused. "Oh yeah, that grown up thing we do? For some reason it keeps you in your head. Don't ask me how but if it works, it works…"

"Of course you think it's the…." Puck shook his head. This time it had absolutely nothing to do with what he thought. This was proven over and over again. Unintentionally of course but still backed up with sufficient evidence.

"I'll show you next time." Quinn grimaced. The fact that he even knew there would be any number of next times still had a way of making her feel uncomfortable. It was one thing for his family to be completely okay with the fact that they were very…active. It was another to think that anyone had heard them.

"You're so confident I'll keep…putting out for you," she laughed. Puck on his part scowled. She had to know by now that he wanted none of it.

"Well, making a baby is kind of like the Olympics, right? You work it until eventually, something gives and boom, we got a baby." Hazel eyes rolled hard. "I'm just trying to explain something."

"Oh and you're doing a great job. Keep going," she smirked.

"I'm just saying…training is…."

"Fun? I gathered as much over the last few years. Let's go make an appearance before this one starts dragging us out into the hall by herself. And then you can tell us how that job hunt is going." Mention of his success, or lack thereof in the department drew a look of what could only be described as horror. "Not good?"

"Job hunting is crap…"

"You can tell your mom all about it. Maybe she has some ideas." Puck shook his head, almost afraid of what his mother's "suggestions" really were.

"I'm starting to miss your pessimism just a bit…."

"This is your fault, Mr. Puckerman." Nodding slowly, everyone knew that on some level. Even being in the house brought out her lighter side. Add the occasional play and well, training was good for anybody's nerves. But this was Quinn Fabray. Knowing he was the only one to make her happy in such a way was something he would always take with him. Add Beth into the equation and well...

"I take full responsability," he grinned. "Now, while she's this happy, let's go find out if you'll work through some of those waffles we've been talking about."

"She'll try themm when she's ready..." she sighed. "I'm gonna focus on the fact that she's happy and talking. Three words in two weeks isn't bad considering." She kept to herself that she almost hoped she would be producing for at least a little while before she did away with it entirely; even though they all knew that she should be already.

"Are you a happy girl?" The lazy smile she wore was answer enough. "Good. Maybe you can help me fill out a few applications. I'm gonna need a lot of that positivity."