"What's going on here?" Ben said in a low voice, his breath at a steady pace.
"Well I don't know about you but I sense a bit of déjà vu," Abi gave her cheating boyfriend a devilish stare with her lips in a straight and firm line with her eyebrow arched. Her hand was rested on her hip.
Jay looked over at Abi in disbelief. The Abi that he once dated would never say anything like this. She would never make such harsh and witty comments towards other people, but she was growing up and things would have bound to have changed. Jay's lips pulled up into a small smirk. He kind of liked this side of Abi- he found it rather hot.
Ben released a calm and longing breath. He was trying to maintain his anger. How dare she stand there in that red lacy underwear with Jay standing beside her in his boxers. How dare them both, how dare they both do that!
"I'll ask you again, what's going on here?" Ben asked, firmly.
"Do we have to spell it out to you?" Abi scoffed, sarcastically. "You must know about the birds and the bees. You know especially being with me...and Paul." Abi let out a small breath as she had begun to feel slightly hurt as she thought about her revelation about Ben the night before.
"But why?" Ben demanded, "I thought you two were past all that now, I thought you two were in the past?"
For a moment, there was an awkward pause.
"What are you doing here anyway?" Jay asked suspiciously, scratching the back of his neck. "It's a Saturday, we aint open on weekends."
"I left something here and I came to pick it up," Ben said bluntly. "I didn't expect to find you two here. I was starting to get worried about you, Abs."
"Yeah well you've found me now," Abi snarled. "I think you should go now."
"What and leave you two here?" Ben scoffed, "Don't you think I deserve an explanation?"
"Don't you think I deserve one?" Abi exclaimed.
Ben let out an angry sigh. "Alright, if you want to have this out, I'll see you back at the house- just the three of us." He spoke harshly "I'll see you there in 5."
Ben sent over a dark glare before picking up some documents that he left on the desk the day before and evacuating the garage. Abi let out a sigh as she turned to Jay, "I really don't want to talk to him." She moaned as she picked up her playsuit and climbed into it.
"You have to talk to him at some point," Jay told her softly as he put on his jeans. "To finalise things y'know."
Abi let out a small sigh as she sat herself down on the chair and started to put on her socks and boots. "I guess so, there's definitely no going back for me and him." She shook her head in disgust, adamant with her decision.
"I don't blame you," Jay commented as he put his shirt back on. "It was wrong what he did, stringing you a long like that."
Abi looked up at Jay sadly, "Do you think he ever loved me Jay?"
Jay sighed as he locked his eyes with those chocolate pools, "Who knows eh? He claimed that he did but I guess we'll never know the truth."
Abi nodded in understanding as she bit down on her bottom lip in concentration. She suddenly looked back up at Jay, "Do you think it's wrong what we did?" She swallowed a gulp.
Jay looked back up at Abi as he finished buttoning up his shirt and was putting on his socks whilst leaning up against the bonnet of the car in order to maintain his balance. His lips curved up into a small smile, "Do you?"
Abi shook her head whilst giving him a small smile, "I guess not."
Jay smirked, "Me neither."
Abi stood up to grab her leather jacket when she started giggling whilst putting it on, "I'm surprised we remembered it as we were drunk," Abi stated, as she ran her hand through her wavy blonde hair awkwardly. However, she soon cursed herself once she had said it, wondering whether she had just offended Jay.
"I certainly remembered it," Jay smiled. "Otherwise I wouldn't have done it if I weren't in the right frame of mind."
Abi gave him a small smile. At least she wasn't some drunken mistake as some people like to call to it, she thought. "So, you don't regret it?" Abi enquired, dragging out her words.
Jay shook his head, smiling reassuring at her. Abi suddenly felt the insides of her stomach do back flips. That was the feeling that she hadn't felt in a while. Yes, Ben sent her those feelings once in a while but not as strong as how Jay use to. Abi looked away as her mind began to explode into flashbacks:
It was Valentine's Day 2013 and her and Jay were letting off a few mini fireworks in the living room.
"This is it, the dragon tornado," Jay announced. "Boom!"
They watched the small flame.
"More like a dragon's poop," Abi teased.
"You cheeky little mare," Jay spoke in disbelief before he went to tickle Abi. Abi began to laugh hysterically whilst Jay was mocking what she was going to say to stop him from tickling her. He knew her inside and out. Abi's giggling was drawn to a close as Jay and Abi just gazed into each other's eyes, not moving or saying a word. All of a sudden, the smoke alarm went off.
They both looked up. Abi looked away as she started to feel her body heat up, "Saved by the bell, open a window."
Jay lifted himself off the ground but was crouched down to Abi's side as he touched her shoulder, "Abi, there's a fire, we gotta get you out of here," Jay said in a serious and hushed tone.
"What?" Abi began to panic.
"Abi, come on quick, there's a fire- run, run, run!" Jay started to act alarmed as he lifted Abi off her feet and led her out into the hallway, listening to the sound of her laugh as they hurried into the hallway and towards the front door.
...
"I can't believe I fell asleep, what time is it?" Abi started to panic as she rushed through the Square Gardens in the middle of the night as Jay tried to keep up with her.
"Like 3 'o' clock," Jay informed her.
Abi's head flicked round to face Jay. "My mum's gonna kill me!" Abi shrieked. She carried on pacing towards her house before Jay grabbed her by the arm and spun her round to face him. He was smiling at her.
"It's magic isn't it," Jay grinned.
"It was all magic," Abi grinned back, swaying from side to side.
"I love you," Jay spoke softly.
"I love you too," Abi responded.
Then, the demons awakened as they slowly crept up into her brain as she thought of when everything fell apart. Yes, her and Jay were happy once upon a time, really happy in fact, but something had changed that. That something was Lola Pearce, even though Jay told her last night that the main reason why they split up was because she was going up in the world and Jay didn't want to ruin that for her by clinging to her like some puppy. She didn't know what to think. She knew she still had feelings for Jay, but she just didn't know what to do. Not anymore.
"Abi."
Abi got pulled away from her thoughts as Jay called her name. Abi looked at him and a fake smile was pulled across her lips.
"You alright?" Jay asked, concerned. He was now fully dressed and ready to go. "What are you thinking about?"
"Just Ben," Abi lied through her teeth. She found it quite surprising how Jay still knew how she was even though they hadn't been together for over a year. He could still read her like a book and at that moment in time, she didn't know whether it was a good or a bad thing. She actually found it rather annoying because a) they're not together anymore and b) she didn't want to tell him what she was really thinking about.
Jay nodded as he looked at her unsure, like he knew that she was lying, "Everything will be fine. To be honest, Ben's stupid for doing that to you."
"Really?" Abi frowned as she raised her eyebrow at Jay.
"Yeah, you're amazing," Jay complimented with a soft tone to his voice.
Abi pulled a petite smile. They gazed at each other for a moment before Abi quickly looked away and began to run her hand through her hair, "We should probably start heading back," Abi stated, awkwardly as she grabbed her handbag, "Might as well get this over and done with."
"Yeah, alright," Jay said, casually. "Let's go."
Abi smiled nervously at Jay as she walked out of the Arches and absorbed the morning atmosphere, with a chilly mist in the air and hearing the sound of birds singing and babies crying. It sounded like a busy morning in Albert Square. Jay stood behind her.
"Shall we get going then?" He asked.
Abi quickly looked at Jay and gave him a small smile, "Yeah...can we go the long way though?"
"Yeah course," Jay nodded.
They started walking down the back passage of the Arches. They didn't speak but it was a comfortable silence. Abi was contemplating on her life and what she was going to do next. She couldn't stay with the Mitchells after she had broken up with Ben, even if Jay offered to sleep on the couch whereas she slept in his bed. She considered whether it would now be awkward after what had happened between them the night before. She didn't really have any family around here anymore. Her father is in prison, her mum and Oscar are living in Exeter, Lauren is living in New Zealand with Peter and their new son Louie and her grandmother, Cora, well she hasn't been around for her lately. She's in a mess at the moment and wouldn't let anyone help her. She was scared of her own shadow at the moment. Her aunt Carol had jetted off on her granddad Jim's motorbike to some place where no one knows, she didn't think Carol did either, which left Sonia, Tina and Rebecca just living at number 45 now.
However, there was Dot. She would always welcome Abi into her home and give her the time of day. She was always there for her family, no matter what they did- she always found a way of forgiving them. Plus, Cora was staying there too and perhaps she could rekindle a relationship with her grandmother and try to help her and get her back to her normal self.
Right now, she wasn't focused on relationships. For once, she wanted to think about herself instead of other people. Abi wanted to get her life back on track and sort herself out. Good on ya girl! Her subconscious triumphed with pride.
Abi and Jay started to walk through the market when she noticed Paul helping set up the flower stall in Pam's absence along with all the other market traders who were setting up their stalls. Abi's eyes suddenly turned dark.
"Abs, leave it," Jay said, warily as he noticed Abi look over at Paul.
However, Abi ignored Jay's comment and strided over to Paul determinedly and with her blood boiling.
"Abi..." Paul began with a calm and shaky tone, as he noticed her coming towards him with Jay following behind.
"Don't worry, I'm not stopping for a chat," Abi spoke bitterly and with her voice slightly raised, just when Pam came out of the café with two cups of hot tea in takeaway polystyrene cups, clasped in both of her hands. "I've just come to thank you for helping me realise that my boyfriend was actually gay and just to let you know that he is now all yours. You two are welcome to each other!"
"Abs, come on, let's go," Jay begged her in a hushed tone as he took hold of her arm gently. "Trust me, it's not worth it."
"Erm, what's going on?" Pam asked suspiciously as she came over.
"Do you want to know what your precious grandson has been doing?" Abi laughed, spitefully.
"Abi," Jay warned, looking directly at her.
"He's been sleeping with my boyfriend behind my back," Abi snarled. "Just can't keep his hands to himself." Abi gave Paul an evil look as Pam's jaw dropped as she looked at Paul in horror and disbelief. Yes, she knew that Paul was gay but didn't know that he was one to sleep with other people's men.
"Abi, move," Jay ordered as he dragged his former girlfriend gently by the arm, dragging her down the rest of the market. The rest of the market was looking at each other and whispering about Abi's sudden announcement.
"Paul, please tell me this isn't true," Pam said in a hushed tone. "Ben Mitchell?!"
Paul nodded timidly, causing Pam to look away and sigh with disbelief, "And I thought this family had dropped enough bombshells!"
"I never intended to hurt Abi, Nan," Paul tried to reason. "It's just Ben has fallen for me and I have fallen for him. I didn't want to be secret but he felt like he had to be because of Abi and his dad would kill him if he found out! Ben's scared to come out, Nan. Please, you cannot tell anyone, I'm begging you!"
Pam looked at Paul as her facial expression had begun to soften. She gave her grandson a small smile as she handed him his tea. Pam knew that Paul had a heart of gold and would never intend to hurt anyone or be mean and spiteful. "Alright, I won't say anything. I just don't want to see you get hurt, pet. I mean, you're the only one that's keeping my spirits up since your granddad left. It's not fair what that Ben's doing to you and Abi, stringing you both along like that. Just be careful."
Paul gave his grandmother a genuine smile. He loved the relationship that the two of them shared- they were always there for each other and looking out for one another, no matter what.
"Why did you drag me away like that?" Abi hissed as they were nearing the Mitchell house. "It's like you're on their side and you're trying to protect Ben. Well, that wasn't the view you were giving me last night!"
"I'll put my hands up to it, I do feel sorry for Ben in a way as I know what Phil can get like but it doesn't make it right what he did to you. I can guarantee you that I am not on their side." Jay tried to explain.
"Then why did you stop me?" Abi demanded, irritation leaking out of her tone.
Jay rolled his eyes. He stopped in his tracks whilst grabbing hold of Abi's arm to stop her from walking. Abi was looking at Jay coldly. Jay let out a sigh before putting both of his hands firmly on Abi's shoulders, "I understand that you're angry for what they did to you but I was just trying to save your dignity a bit yeah? I mean if I was you, I wouldn't really want to go around blabbing about it."
Abi let out a sigh. She knew that he was right and that annoyed her. He did have a point. "I guess you're right," Abi admitted. "We better go inside."
"Yeah, let's face the fireworks!"
Jay pushed the gate open as they entered the back yard. Abi opened the back door to find Ben leaning up against the kitchen worktop, looking directly at them, giving them a dark and cold stare which sent shivers up both of their spines.
"Alright," Jay mumbled as he closed the back door behind them.
"Don't talk to me like I'm your mate," Ben scoffed at Jay. "Y'know acting like I'm your brother. Give me a break- not after what you just did."
"Well I don't know why you're having a go at us," Abi complained. "I mean compared to you. Y'know, you and Paul? How long has that been going on for behind my back?"
"About 6 months or so," Ben shrugged it off.
"You disgust me,"" Abi spat. "How could you do this to me? After everything that me and you have been through?!"
"Yeah well it's not about me and what I've done right now," Ben raised his voice, holding his hand out in front of him in a stop sign. "Let's talk about you and lover boy here shall we? I mean, what the hell were you two thinking? Going behind my back and having it off in the Arches- oh how very romantic!" He added sarcastically.
"You are such a hypocrite!" Abi exclaimed in disbelief. "You have such a cheek having a go at Jay and I for sleeping together when you're the one that's been sleeping with a bloke behind my back for the past six months or so!"
"Like I said, this isn't about me," Ben growled, his teeth clenched.
"Well if you must know, you could say that I was claiming what was rightfully mine," Jay said smugly, with his arms folded across his chest. Abi turned to Jay mortified, arching her eyebrow.
"Oh shut up!" Ben shrieked. "You're the one that left her for Lola, leaving heartbroken! Do you remember Lola, Jay?" He asked, with a patronising tone of voice.
"Yeah well she really wanted you didn't she," Ben snarled. "Ended up leaving you for your best mate. You had a good girl in Abi there mate- was it really all worth it?"
Jay came towards Ben. "Why don't you shut your mouth?" Jay growled.
"Ouch, did I hit a nerve there, Jay?" Ben tormented.
Jay was going to lunge for him until Abi pulled him back by the arm. "Leave it Jay, he's not worth it."
"Yeah Jay, listen to the girl," Ben goaded him, smirking slyly as he stood up against the worktop with his arms folded across his chest.
Jay took one look at Abi who was clinging to his arm and begun to relax. She always knew how to tame him. He let out an exasperated sigh as he went to stand by the sink.
"I'm actually hurt Abi," Ben stated which caused Jay to roll his eyes flamboyantly. "I'm hurt that you would do this to me. You could have slept with anyone, but Jay, the person I see as a brother."
"You are such a hypocrite!" Abi bellowed, anger rising to an extreme level in her system. "I can't believe you're acting like the victim, claiming that I am in the wrong when for the past six months or whatever you have been sleeping with Paul behind my back!"
"So that makes us equal then does it?" Ben started to be manipulative. "Or do you just like to go round dropping your knickers for the Mitchell brothers?"
Jay's jaw dropped in horror and his eyes widened like saucers. Abi gasped with shock and hurt as she heard the words that had slipped out of Ben's mouth. No one was expecting it when Abi's hand lifted into the air and slapped Ben so hard across his left cheek and scraping her long fingernails across his cheek that it even made the palm of Abi's hand tingle. It seemed like it was all going in slow motion. Abi stared at Ben taking deep, angry breathes as her face flushed red as her body was literally bursting with anger. Ben's head slowly turned to the front with visible red scratch marks across his cheek which was bleeding slightly. Jay smacked his hand across his mouth in shock but was covering up a smirk as he couldn't believe that Abi just did that to him- however, he did deserve it.
"How dare you say that?!" Abi shouted. "Who the hell do you think you are? You think you're so perfect right now don't you Ben Mitchell, when surprise, surprise- you're not! How can you have the cheek to imply that I am the one in the wrong when take a look at your track record! You just want everyone to pity you don't you? Thinking I'm the cheat, when I'm not. You are. For the record, I'm most likely more hurt than you are as it sounds like I have been used just to hide your sexuality! How dare you use me in that way after everything I have done for you Ben? I have been there for you through thick and thin no matter what and this is how you repay me huh?! You're a disgrace!"
Ben's facial expression softened. "Look Abs, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I'm sorry about what happened with Paul, I wasn't thinking straight. I love you, you're everything to me- please don't leave me!"
"Oh save it Ben," Abi spat. "I don't want to hear it. All you've done is proved who you really are and there is definitely no going back between us so just save your breath because I am not interested."
"Please Abs, this can't be over. You're the one for me. We can make this work. I will cut all ties with Paul- please Abi, I love you!" Ben cried in desperation as he tried to reach for Abi's hand in which she just jolted away.
Abi shook her head. "No Ben. It's over. I'm going to pack my stuff."
Abi turned on her heel and headed towards the hallway.
"Please Abi, don't do this!" Ben begged her. "I love you!"
Abi paused in the doorframe. She took a deep breath as she turned to look at Ben. "Do you know what the sad thing is Ben? You didn't only destroy a relationship and a future between us- you've also destroyed a friendship that we've had for the past nine years!"
Abi was about to make her way upstairs when Kathy came bursting through the back door.
"Sorry I didn't knock, I just wanted to come and see you." Kathy said in a breathless voice as she looked at Ben. She looked around at the tense scene. "Is everything alright?" She frowned.
"Oh don't worry Kathy, your little prince is fine," Abi snapped as she marched across the hallway and up the stairs.
Kathy walked over to Ben and caressed his injured cheek, "What's happened love? And what happened to your cheek?"
"Abi and I have just had a massive argument, hormones," Ben chuckled sadly. "She's just dumped me."
"Oh sweetheart," Kathy embraced her youngest son in her arms. "It'll be alright. I know all about hormones. Abi will come round, I promise."
"Let's hope so," Ben gave a sad smile on his mum's shoulder. He looked up at Jay to find him shaking his head at him with anger and disbelief. Jay stormed off upstairs.
Meanwhile up in Ben's room, a large suitcase had been chucked onto the double bed whilst Abi was throwing clothes into the suitcase with angry tears swimming down her cheeks. Abi was normally more organised but she didn't care at this time, she just wanted to get out of there, away from Ben.
She heard a faint knock on the door.
"Abs, it's me," Jay said on the other side of the door.
"Oh come in," Abi responded almost immediately. She quickly wiped away her tears as Jay opened the door.
"Are you alright?" Jay asked as he walked over to her.
"Yeah, I'm fine," Abi gave him a watery smile.
Jay raised his eyebrow at her before pulling her into a hug, allowing Abi to whimper on his shoulder for a bit. "It's okay to be hurt y'know, you don't need to hide it," he reassured her.
Abi pulled away from Jay as she wiped away the remaining tears, "I'm not crying because I'm hurt. I'm just angry, I'm so angry at Ben." She continued to chuck clothes into the case.
"That's understandable," Jay agreed as he sat down on the end of the bed. "Do you want any help?" He offered.
"Could you get my stuff from the bathroom please?" She suggested.
"Yeah course," Jay gave her a small smile before making his way into the bathroom to grab Abi's stuff whilst Abi continued to throw clothes and now shoes into the large case until her drawers and her half of the wardrobe was clear.
Eventually, Jay came back with Abi's bathroom stuff and laid them out neatly on the bed.
"Thank you Jay," Abi smiled gratefully.
Jay responded with a wink, which made Abi's heart flutter. He really did know how to make her legs turn into jelly. For some reason, he always had that effect on her.
She started to arrange her bathroom stuff into the case and started to tidy the case up a bit to ensure that she would be able to close it.
"You don't have to move out y'know," Jay commented as he looked up at Abi.
"Well, what do you suggest?" Abi raised her eyebrow.
"You can sleep in my bed," Jay suggested. "And I'll sleep on the sofa."
Abi shook her head, "It wouldn't be fair on you, Jay." She grabbed hold of her makeup bag, her hairbrush, her curling tongs and her hair strengtheners along with her laptop and charger and phone charger and placed them into the suitcase. "Plus, it would be awkward considering that Ben and I have just broken up and no offence, but I'd rather not still live under the same roof as him."
Jay nodded, understandingly. "Where will you go?"
"I'll stay round grandma Dot's," Abi replied. "I know she'll take me in, she's never let us down."
Jay nodded. At least she's certain that she will have somewhere to stay, he thought with a shrug.
"We'll still see each other won't we?" Jay suddenly asked.
"What do you mean?" Abi frowned.
"I dunno," Jay shrugged. "Maybe we could meet up some time?"
Abi felt her heart skip a beat. Was Jay asking her out on a date? Or was he just implying to meet up as just friends? She was contemplating what she was going to do with her life next. She wasn't sure whether she was ready to jump back into a relationship. She just wanted to get her life back on track at the moment. Right now, it was all about moving forward.
"Maybe," she answered in a playful manner which made Jay smirk. She started to zip up her case.
"Is that everything?" Jay asked.
"Yeah, I think so," Abi ran her hand through her hair.
"Do you want help bringing the case down?" He offered.
"It's like you can't wait to get rid of me," Abi teased.
"Well you can stay if you want," Jay suggested, playfully.
Abi giggled as she shook her head, "No, no. However, I will take up your offer on having a hand with the case." She grinned cheekily.
Jay tutted teasingly as he lifted the case from the bed and carried it down the stairs, parking it by the front door.
"Well, I guess I'll see you later then," Jay said softly, not taking his eyes off of Abi and she couldn't take her eyes off him either.
"Yeah, see you later," Abi gave him a small smile before Jay opened the door wide open for her.
Abi lifted up the handle of the suitcase and started to wheel it out of the door and along the pavement. Jay watched her back smiling, admiring her blonde hair swaying in the breeze. Abi looked over her shoulder to notice Jay looking at her. She flashed him a wide smile before she was out of sight, but not out of mind.
A/N: Longest chapter to date!
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