Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no. John intended the words as a scream, but all that came out were raspy breaths.
"Heydrich has made heroic plans to carry the Nazi project to its next stage of development. He believes he is alone among the senior generation of Nazis in having the vision and will to make it happen. And he has honored me by revealing his secrets to me. He says he believes I have a bright future in the Party. He says he sees something of himself in me. I have 'that special something.'"
No, Thomas! He's lying! I know what Heydrich is like! He gets impressionable young men to do his dirty work and betray the Fürher, and then he lures them to his castle and disposes of them.
"He said he was afraid you do not have that same something."
Thomas, can't you see? He's using you!
"I told him I was sure you were as fine a Nazi as any man, second only to the Fürher himself. See, Father: I defended you. No matter what you think, I've been loyal to you—loyal to a fault.
You've betrayed me!
"So I proposed a test to Herr Heydrich. He's a fair man; he agreed to help me. He commended me for my plan, in fact—he said it showed remarkable initiative."
Flattery! You can't trust that snake!
"I swapped my medical records with those of Uncle George. Heydrich gave me the name of someone at the hospital who could help me with that. I wanted to see how you would react when Dr. Adler told you of my disease: would you do your duty, or let sentiment get in your way?"
Oh Thomas—what have you done?
"I was so glad when you asked me on this hunting trip. See? I wanted you to succeed." THomas frowned and his voice faltered. "I had so wanted you to be the kind of father I could be proud of. I could have gone to Heydrich with proof of your worth. You and I, with Heydrich, all of us together, could have been the ones to lead the Reich into its next phase."
Thomas!
"I wasn't stupid, of course. I was watching you. I replaced all your shotgun shells with blanks, and when I found where you had hid Dr. Adler's syringe, I poured out the poison and replaced it with harmless water. I replaced the other poisons you bought as well."
Heydrich has turned you into a traitor!
"Then, I waited for you to act. It was torture, waiting all day for you to turn your gun on me, trying to stay close enough for you to take a shot, but not so close the blast of the blank might burn me.
"And then, last night, laying in bed, expecting the jab of a needle at any moment. And all the while, coming to terms with the growing possibility that you might prove to be too weak to do it. Telling myself not to lose faith in you, believing to the last in my own father."
I was thinking only of what was best for you! And you were setting a trap for me!
Thomas' face twisted with bitterness. "You never acted. You sat there like a sheep." Thomas stepped back to regard John in full as he lay slumped before his chair. "When I woke up this morning and found you sitting there, asleep—asleep! With the proof of your guilt, the syringe, lying in your lap! How—" Thomas' jaw was fairly chattering with rage, and he struggled to spit out the poisonous words. "How pathetic. Can't you do anything right? You're a failure. You are not my father. Reinhard Heydrich is my father now. He is my Fürher and teacher. I take my place by his side. You, though…"
Thomas paused. As John lay helpless, unable to wipe away the trickle of drool dripping down his chin, Thomas turned away to hide the sobs that silently shook his lean, youthful form.