Emotion Prompt: Nauseous

Character: Regulus Black, Bellatrix Lestrange

Summary: Regulus gets much more than he had bargained for on his first outing as a death eater.

I don't even know why I came.

No other garb had felt so oppressive to Regulus as his black hooded cloak and silver mask did. It felt as if the dark cloak was weighing him down with all the expectations of his family and the burden of the deal he had accepted. The mask covered all of his face except the eyes. It made him claustrophobic. And the Dark Mark... it had been branded onto his forearm two days ago, but it still seemed to be burning.

"Are we there yet?" he asked nervously.

"Eager, are we?" his companion laughed. "Be pleased, Reg darling. We are indeed here."

Bella's words did nothing to increase Regulus' peace of mind. Instead, his stomach churned in a most unpleasant way.

I don't want to do this.

He looked at the solitary cottage nestled in the dark countryside. It looked so quiet, so peaceful. But not for long...

Standing alone and cold, fingering his wand, Regulus couldn't help long for Sirius' warm company. His mind went back to the days spent in laughter and joy with his older brother, the happy days of childhood. But they were gone; Sirius was gone too. Now he had only Bella, who had taken him along to teach him 'how to show the muggles their place'. He did not have the courage to refuse, especially after signing up to the Dark Lord's service, but he wasn't really eager to do this. They are people too, a part of his mind whispered, only to be hurriedly suppressed by the rest of him.

The house was small and very homely in appearance, its little garden well-kept. Bella walked up to the door. She was too sure of herself; she had not donned her mask, only the black hooded cloak.

"Knock, knock." She winked at Regulus, and with a flick of her wand, the door blasted back.

"Come on," she urged impatiently as she strode forward. Regulus followed her quickly.

They had hardly walked five steps when an old man ran from inside.

"Who are you? What do you want?" he demanded.

Bellatrix said nothing, just smiled wickedly.

"Watch and learn, little cousin," she whispered to Regulus. Her eyes glittered with malice as her lips curled in disdain. "Crucio," she purred.

The effect was immediate. The man screamed and was lifted off the floor. He writhed in mid-air, screaming in pain, before his body crashed to the floor. Bella smiled in satisfaction.

"This is how you do it, Reg," she said, as if she were teaching him a delicate art. "Watch him writhe. Hear him scream. Isn't that so delightful?"

Regulus couldn't find anything about it delightful in the least. He felt ill. He just wanted to go home and shut his eyes and wipe the image of what was happening before his eyes from his mind.

"John!" A shout came from within. Whoever you are, don't come, Regulus prayed in vain. Seconds later, a tiny lady with gray hair tied up in a bun ran into the room. She froze as she saw Bella standing over (what Regulus assumed was) her husband, Regulus' form beside her and her husband's twisting, screaming figure.

"Wh-what?" she whispered, looking like she was about to faint.

"Another plaything!" Bella cackled. "You can practice on this one, Regulus. Petrificus totalus!"

The woman fell to the floor, frozen, her eyes wide and terrified.

"This one's yours," Bella told him. "But for now, watch and learn."

Regulus watched with growing horror as Bella stepped closer to the man.

"Filth," she whispered, "you are of no use you the world, but you can be made use of." She lowered her wand. The man stopped jerking, but lay gasping on the floor, too weak to move. And then with elaborate slowness, she began tracing her wand in the air over the man. And with every move, the man's skin and muscle split open, and blood gushed out freely.

"Can you see his filthy blood, Regulus?" Bellatrix murmured. "This is where it belongs — at our feet."

If Regulus had been younger, he would have clapped his ears over his hands to block out the man's screams. But now, he only clenched his eyes shut and felt bile rise in his throat as he heard the horrible screams of pain.

"Rodolphus likes to kill straight away, but I like this better," he heard Bella say. "Where's the fun if you can't hear your victim scream?"

Regulus wondered how long he could stand it. The screaming and the ripping seemed to go on and on for eternity.

And then it all stopped. There was a ghastly flash of light which fell on his retina, crossing his shut eyelids, a light moan, and then silence. Regulus opened his eyes. There on the floor was a grizzly mess lying in the pool of blood, which could barely be recognised as the owner of the house. He looked at Bella.

"Your turn, little king," she grinned at him. Regulus looked at the frozen woman on the floor. Her eyes were filled with tears, beseeching.

I'm sorry, Regulus thought. But there was no way he could back out of this now. Not even when he wanted to. He raised his wand, his hand shaking badly.

"Do it," Bella ordered impatiently. She lifted the body-bind from the woman the same instant Regulus whispered Crucio.

The woman was thrown off her feet. She hovered in the air for a few moments, and then landed back on the floor with a thump, a small tremor running through her body.

"Tsk, tsk, that won't do at all!" Bellatrix cried. "You have to mean it, silly boy! You have to enjoy the pain, relish the terror!" Her voice grew increasingly maniacal as she spoke, and Regulus stumbled back, more terrified of her than ever.

"Here, let me show you."

Regulus knew he would never forget the screams of the old man and his wife. They would haunt him throughout his life, in sleep and in waking. With every scream that the woman uttered, he felt his nausea heighten, until it became unbearable.

"Stop!" he cried. "Stop it!"

To his surprise, Bella actually stopped. The woman crashed to the floor with the moan, and sunk down, unconscious.

"Is my baby cousin scared?" Bella mocked. "Can't handle it all, Reggie?"

"Stop it, please," was all Regulus could say.

Bella laughed. "Very well, then. You get a D for today's lesson."

As they left, Bellatrix turned and casually muttered, "Avada Kedavra." The body of the woman lifted centimetres from the ground, and then fell back limbly. Regulus just turned away and tried to believe that he hadn't seen it happen.

Regulus didn't bother to say a word of parting to Bella. With a curt nod that was hardly noticeable, he quickly disapparated from the spot.

Moments later, he appeared by his home at 12, Grimmauld Place. Barely managing to keep himself from hurling his dinner over on the ground, he leaned against the wall. He could not suppress the horror that clutched him as the events of the night flashed across his mind. They had been innocent people. They had committed no crime. They had a family, maybe, children and grandchildren perhaps. And now they were dead. And the worst of all — Regulus had seen it with his own eyes — contradicting all the teachings that had been drilled into his head since his childhood, the man's, the muggle's blood had been just as red as his own. Even redder, maybe.

His eyes strayed to his forearm. The Dark Mark branded on it seemed to leer at him. Regulus closed his eyes in revulsion, and only opened them when they were looking at the sky. The brightest star twinkled from amidst a frame of clouds.

"Oh Merlin," he murmured, hating himself and the path that he had chosen. "What have I done?"