Gale-

I know she's been out here recently; I can tell her snares from anyone else's. She's definitely better with a bow, but her knots are getting better. I can hear her coming, any other person wouldn't have caught that it was her. She's either being careless, which means she caught enough for the day or she's out of practice since there's been months of snow. Normally I hate coming out before all of the snow is gone because we leave tracks out to the fence, but I've been checking for the past couple of weeks to see if she's been here. Even though the snow still sticks out here, it's been humid enough to come out.

It's the first time I've seen her in months. She looks nothing like the girl I used to know, she's not the thin and wiry girl that I used to come out here with. Her hips are wide, her waist is still small and her breasts are that of a woman. The hair coming out of her braid sticks to her neck and face with sweat. When she wipes her brow with the back of her hand, her shirt pulls up showing off her stomach. No ribs showing, no emancipation. She looks like a goddamn dream, a wet dream at that. I've never seen anyone so beautiful.

I've never been nervous to speak to her, then again I've never acted like such an asshole towards her before. And she's never actually taken my breath away like she is now. "Hi Catnip, you- uh, you look great." Fuck, what the fuck do I even say to her? How in the world can I tell her how sorry I am, what an idiot I was? As soon I got thrown out of Madge's party, I threw up all over the side of her house. Not just from the liquor, or Mellark's fists in my side, but what I did. To her. The one girl that I had given my heart to and I fucking destroyed her. I practically pushed her into his arms. And into his house.

The way my name leaves her lips, makes my knees shake. Even when she's angry, she's gorgeous. "Cat, listen- I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. You know that wasn't me- you know how I feel about you." Fuck, that was not the right thing to say. I should have thought this out better. She's not just some girl that I can work over. Words never worked on her. There's anger in her eyes, her fingers in my chest, backing me up into a tree. If would be so hot, but I'm not sure at this point if she's going to punch me or not. Even though I definitely deserve it.

"Please know that I'm sorry." I can barely get the words out without my voice cracking. "I didn't mean to hurt you, I was just angry and hurt that you chose him over me." Her body is firm in her stance, but her eyebrows twitch. In the smallest way, I know she at least heard me. I guess that's the most I could ask for. All I hear are the words, 'I'm Peeta's'. Crushed. It's the perfect word to describe my heart in this moment.

She goes on about not having time to take in her extra kills. I know she's lying. She doesn't need it and I'm not sure if she feels sorry for me or the situation. But there's no way that I'm going to fight her on this one. When I see her toss over a few plump squirrels and some rabbits, I can't help but feel ashamed. I can't believe that I let this happen. She's my ally. My number one, my inevitable and I let it slip away. I'm not even sure if she hears the thanks that I give her. When she turns to go, all I want is to go after her and wrap my arms around her. But I can't, and it's my fault. This is one thing that I could never forgive myself for.

I slide down the tree that was holding me up, the bark scraping through my threadbare t-shirt. I barely feel the sting that it causes on my skin. How do I fix this? How do I get back the only thing in my life that's worth anything? My eyes start to burn and the coal dust on my hands doesn't help when I try to rub the tears away. I don't show emotion like this, the last time I cried was when my father was killed. This feels similar, part of my heart is dying, just like back then.

It's then that I make up my mind, I have to do it. I have to have her, even if I'm second to Mellark. For her, I would do anything. As much as I don't want to, I have to talk to him. I head up through the meadow. I can barely see her outline as she gets closer to the bakery. Fuck. Of course he's there, waiting for her. And of course, she practically jumps into his arms. That should be me, holding her. Kissing her neck, gripping her waist. I should be the one that she gives herself to. Anger fills my fists and my teeth grit.

I can't do this. I can't see him.

Yes. I have to. For her. I won't ever have any part of her life if I don't do this.

I finish passing through the meadow and consider knocking on the back of the bakery where we used to trade, but she's probably back there. I cross by the front window a couple of times. I have to do this. For her. For my girl. Even if she isn't mine anymore. Even if she wasn't ever mine. Even if she won't ever be mine. Now's the time.

The bell jingles above my head when I walk in. Goddamn it, it smells so good in here. That fucker Rye Mellark is the only one up here. Of course it has to be more difficult than just talking to him.

"Mellark- Could you let Peeta know I'd like to speak with him?" I guess I could have asked a little nicer, but at least I don't sound like a dick. He squints and gives a curt nod, then turns towards the back.

I take the chance to look around at all the cakes and cookies, just like we used to do when we were little. Before Mrs. Mellark would come in, waiving a broom at us. Since I'll probably never be allowed in here again, I might as well enjoy it.

He comes around the corner; why does he have to look like such a fucking nice guy. "Mellark – ah, Peeta, can you just hear me out for a second." He gives me a smirk, like he did at Madge's party and I already know what's going to happen. I deserve it.

"Sure, I'll hear you out… but first…" His knuckles crack against my jaw and I can taste the blood filling my mouth. "Now, Gale- what can I do for you today?"

I wipe my lip with the back of my hand and smooth over my beard. One thing he has, is a damn hard right cross. While Cat gained weight, he seems bigger and stronger than before. Shacking up with my girl definitely suits him. He looks calm and confident. Bastard. What I wouldn't give to have a go with him again without liquor running through me. No. I have to do this. For her.

"Peeta. I wanted to come talk with you, about what happened." His eyes squint and his head turns just a bit in question. "I came to apologize." Fuck! Why did I think I could do this? I'm sure he knows I don't mean this shit.

"Spit it out Hawthorne. And I know you were out there. I didn't lie when I said I would kill you if I had to." Well, at least one of us has the balls enough to be honest. I can't help but give a little chuckle and nod in agreeance.

"Fuck, Mellark. I loved her first. I tried to get her to stay away from you, but we both know she does what she wants." He smiled at that, so I know he knows that about her. "What happened was a huge mistake. I was fucked up and I was pissed that she chose you. She was meant to be mine but I love her enough to know that you're the one she wants."

"Yeah, you really fucked that up. But, she'd shoot me with her bow if I didn't at least accept the apology." He's right about that, and I'm thankful for it. "I know you didn't want to hurt her. I know how much she means to you because I feel the same way. I can't fault you for that. If she forgives you, which I don't know if or when that will happen…then ill forgive you. I wouldn't keep her from her family, and I know that's what you mean to her."

I bob my head. There really isn't much more to say. I stick my hand out, hoping he accepts it. Thankfully he does. I don't want to muddy the water with too many words. We've both said our piece. When I turn to leave, I hear the most beautiful sound. My name, from her lips.

"Gale, thank you for coming by." When I turn, she looks even more beautiful. She's changed out of her hunting clothes into a house dress, something simple and plain. It's tied around her waist, showing off her voluptuous figure. Her hair is down and brushed and her feet are bare. She holds out a bag to me. "Here, take this home." She takes a second to pause and looks me straight in the face when I reach out to take it from her hand, "I don't forgive you, but I'll get there." That's my girl.

My lips tighten when Mellark wraps his arm around her back and his hand appears low on her hip. She leans over and kisses him on the cheek and turns to go back where she came from. "Send the kids in soon to get a cookie, and be sure to keep an eye on Rory and Prim." And just like that, she's in the back. I give one last nod to Peeta and head out.

Walking back to the Seam, I decide to keep the squirrels and rabbit for home. With the bread that Cat gave us, it should last until I can get out into the woods. That went better than expected but I still hate myself that it had to happen. It makes me even more mad that she looks so goddamn good, so I know he's taking care of her. Things would be so much easier for me if he was a dick to her, but clearly he isn't. I want to fuck him up and thank him at the same time. She deserves the best and if he gives it to her, then so be it. But no one would ever be able to convince me that I wouldn't do a better job. I could give her what she needed, I would do everything in my power to make it happen. I would take care of her family. Shit, I've been doing it for years. I'd work every shift possible to buy her the things she needs. I'd fuck her like I'm sure he can't. I haven't seen him at the slag heap, so he can't possible have any good experience in bed. It, at the very least, makes me feel better to know that I could give her what he couldn't.

But, if she's happy and she truly looks like she is, then I'm happy. Or at least I can fake that I'm happy for her. If she ever needs me, I'll be here. That's all that matters. And as long as she knows that, then my bullshit apology was worth it.

let me know what you think about the Gale POV! plus, id like to know how many of us everlark-ers are still out there reading! happy labor day weekend!