AN: Hello again! Hope you all enjoy this chapter. :) don't forget to review! Look forward to a new chapter soon - the next one will have much more dialogue between the two as they begin courting.
Marianne was in shock. She stood as close to him as possible, his chin resting on the top of her head and a hand folded around hers near her hip. She felt his finger brush against hers, once, twice, before he pulled away and looked her in the eyes, fingers still wound tightly around hers as if he felt that if he were to let go, she would disappear entirely. "Are you sure?" Three little words. She never thought that words could have such an impact on her, but she felt her heart nearly break when he murmured them. His voice, usually very strong and sure -he was an extremely quiet and humble man, but he was also a very respectable military man, and always confident and sure of himself - came out weak. Normally, such a display of...well, weakness, would make her want to turn away. Willoughby was always confident, and it was part of what originally attracted her to him. She, being a very outspoken woman herself, enjoyed seeing a man so..so like herself. If she had of been able to get a peek into her future a year ago, she would have been sure it was false - to see the Colonel, the man who had been the strongest fixture in her life, next to even Elinor, so nervous and unsure of himself, it was unimaginable. But for some reason, the lack of confidence didn't make her want to turn the other way.
It made her love him more.
"Whatever do you mean?" She inquired, her eyes meeting his own. Despite his nerves, he was able to keep the eye contact. Man up, Colonel, he thought to himself. She's a nineteen year old girl, and she's making you more nervous than any of the men in the military. He had been shot at, stabbed - and his body was littered with random scars, some small, some large, to prove it - and had certainly experienced many things in his life that should make him far more nervous than a woman. He felt pathetic, but he wanted to be sure of one thing, that Marianne was agreeing to be with him, to allow him to court her...possibly even marry her, because she cared for him, felt some sort of attraction - God, could that be true? - and maybe, just maybe, truly loved him, and not just because she felt as though she had to repay him for everything he'd done for her and her family, felt some sort of obligation. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel stuck with him. As much as he wanted to spend his life with her, as much as he loved her, he loved her far too much to lock her into an unhappy life with him just for the sake of his own happiness.
But a smile spread across her face, the shyest smile he had ever seen on Marianne, seeming so unlike her, and his confusion grew. Before he could reply, she opened her mouth to speak up once more. "Colonel Brandon, I just told you that I love you. I accepted your proposal - and even without a ring!" She smiled even larger at him, beaming, and he wanted to sigh in relief at her teasing tone. She was relaxed, happy, that much was obvious, even to him. "I am very, very sure." He felt his knees go weak. She has me feeling like a teenager! And he grinned at her. Actually grinned. She had never seen him look so happy or relieved. She had known him for a year, and she had heard him laugh only once. She had hardly seen him smile, and when she did, it was over as quickly as it happened. She saw him grin, so happy and open, and she realized that she wanted to see that happiness on his face every day more than anything.
He racked his brain, searching for something to say. Anything. But all he could think of was, "I love you." So he told her. Again, and again. He took hold of both her arms and pulled her closer to him quickly before finally releasing her completely - although he wished to hold her and to not be forced to let her go, propriety demanded that he release her. She seemed even more unwilling to part, grasping at his coat when he pulled away. "Just a moment longer." She requested, and he felt his heart - and ego, if he were to be honest with himself - swell to the point of it bursting with happiness. But the moment was short lived. Footsteps heading towards the cottage interrupted them, and he pulled away slowly and unwillingly, sad to separate from her completely.
"I love you, too." She said quietly, voice almost in a whisper. Her eyes glimmered with amusement. He could now hear the footsteps coming closer, and Margaret's excited and loud voice chimed through the open windows. She was talking to his horse, from the sound of it.
"Well, did you two have a nice meeting?" Mrs. Dashwood seemed to dance through the doorway, happy to see them standing so closely. She had even caught the tail end of their conversation and could have sworn she heard her daughter whisper an "I love you" towards the Colonel! Her excitement wasn't able to be hidden.
"Wonderful." Marianne said, gliding towards her eldest sister as soon as she walked through the door. She hooked an arm around hers and whispered to her for a moment before Elinor suddenly went to her mother and Margaret and requested their assistance in another room. Marianne and the Colonel were alone once more, although this time, they had a very small window of opportunity. And it was getting dark. He knew he would have to take his leave soon.
"I asked Elinor to escort my mother and sister upstairs for a moment. I know you'll be needing to go soon and..and I wanted to be able to say goodbye properly."
"Properly?" His mouth was still, but his eyes were twinkling. "Would you walk me outside?" She asked, taking his elbow and leading the way without waiting for his response. He imagined a scenario, one that still seemed impossible and too much like a dream than reality - one where she led him outside of the cottage and allowed him to hold her again..his mind continued to think on, imagining what it would be like to put his mouth on hers, to kiss her. They were, in his (and her) opinion all but engaged, he just had to give her the ring to make it truly official, so surely, a kiss wouldn't be so very improper or presumptuous of him. But even still, he would wait patiently to be sure of what she desired. He would only ask for things that he knew she was eager to give.
Once they were outside, safe from the eyes of her family, she pulled him to the gate, where his horse was safely tied and happily grazing, and removed her hand from his elbow in order to move it to his neck. Her hand touched the soft strands of hair at the back of it and he felt her nails lightly graze the skin there, he held back a delighted shiver. How long had it been since he'd been embraced? Touched lovingly? Memories of Eliza came swimming back, days of his youth. He remembered feeling such joy when she was near to him, but nothing compared to his feelings as Marianne came closer and closer, her body gravitated towards his. Complete. He felt complete.
When he looked down at her, she couldn't seem to meet his eyes. He was unaware of this, but she felt far too exposed. She didn't want him to see her eyes fill with tears (happy ones, of course.) and make the poor man uncomfortable. She, instead, put her head on his chest again, the height difference making itself known. Although she was not a very petite woman, she was so much smaller than him. He allowed her to tuck her head into his coat again, his arms wrapping around her as he dropped a hesitant kiss to her hair. How things had changed in the course of a few hours. He hadn't allowed himself to even dream of her accepting his offer of a courtship, let alone picture such a sweet time with her.
"Miss Marianne?" Using miss made him uneasy. With her folded into his arms in such a way, feeling so content and close, it felt incredibly unnatural to be so uptight and polite.
"Yes?" Her voice was muffled by the material of his coat.
"I'm quite unused to this...to courting someone, being with someone. You will have to be patient with me as I learn." He had been with women, of course. Eliza, and various women that he'd come across and, sadly, been with for nights. He regretted those nights, those times of loneliness. But it had been years since Eliza, and that was short lived. He wanted to do things right, for her to enjoy their days together. "It's a good thing I'm not picky then. Simply being with you, that's plenty enough." She assured him. "The way we've been spending time together has been wonderful."
"In that case, perhaps you'd like to join me for a ride tomorrow?" Not the most obvious choice for the typical woman, at least not the ones that he had known, but she had enjoyed riding before and he had already begun to come up with plans, mind churning on ways to make the ride special for her.
"I'd love that." She was eager to have a chance to talk with him - she had been so full of emotions today, too full of them to really carry on a conversation. She found that she longed for tomorrow, to see him again. She missed him already, dreading his goodbye. "I don't want you to leave." She said with a laugh. "How on earth will I last when you are gone for days, weeks at a time?"
"The same way I will, I suppose. I'll write every day when business takes me away. I'll stay in touch as I always have."
They talked for a few more minutes about anything and everything, but the sun had begun it's journey down, and he was soon forced to mount his horse and take his leave. She walked closer to the horse and watched him as he seemed to float up, appreciating his strength in a new way. Not only did she love him, she saw how..how handsome she found him.
Before he rode off, he held his hand out and she took it in hers. He squeezed it before releasing it, already looking forward to tomorrow.
"I'll see you tomorrow then - bright and early."
"I look forward to it." He galloped his horse away, turning it from the gate quickly before dashing off through the trails past the cottage. She found her way back inside and hardly had time to shut the door before she was bombarded with questions from Margaret, Elinor and her mother. But she didn't mind at all.