Chapter Five

Martin wasn't sure if wanted to hear what she had to tell him. The tone of her voice told him he wouldn't like it. Had she decided to go out with Jack this past month? He thought he would have at least heard that through the grape vine, unless they decided to keep it quiet until she could figure out a way to tell him.

He followed her out to the front of the school building, dreading whatever it was she was about to tell him. Somehow knowing it would break his heart even more.

Ruthie stopped by the curve. Kevin would be there soon to pick her up. She still couldn't believe that today was the last day of school and she would be leaving tomorrow. It's now or never, she thought.

"Martin," she said, her nerves starting to become even stronger, "I need you to understand that this is hard for me to tell you, but you deserve to hear it from me." She paused, trying to push down the nerves threatening to overcome her. She couldn't look at him, not when she knew she was about to hurt him. Not as much as he hurt me, though. "I'm leaving. I'm going to stay with Mary for a while."

"Why?" Martin managed to say. It felt like he had just been punched in the gut. Ruthie was leaving town, leaving the state, and it was his fault.

"I've tried to move on here. You know I have. But everywhere I go, I'm reminded of you and I can't do this. I can't move on here." I can't move on anywhere.

"Why do you have to? Why can't we make us work? I love you, Ruthie. Why can't we just get past this?"

"Because you have a son to worry about. You're a new father, Martin. And I can't deal with that. I'm not ready to. Please understand, I have to do what is best for me." She had finally looked up at him. She pleaded with him with her eyes. Hoping he wouldn't fight her on this.

Martin couldn't think. He knew he couldn't fight her on this, not when she felt it was best for her to leave. But that didn't mean it didn't break his heart to know that she was leaving so she could get over him.

"When?" he asked, not sure he wanted to hear the answer. Ruthie just looked away. Kevin was just about to pull into the parking lot. She would be leaving soon. "When do you leave for Chicago?"

Ruthie looked back at him, her eyes soft and sad. She knew he was hoping to have at least another month with her, another month to try to convince her they could make it work. She hated to have to disappoint him.

"My plane leaves in the morning," she told him as Kevin pulled up beside him. "This is goodbye, Martin." Then she got into the car and they drove away.

Martin stood there frozen, watching as the women he loved left his life and he didn't know if he would ever see her again.