A/N: I am slow but persistent. And please go easy on Elsa and Anna. Enjoy.
Trigger warning: references to bullying (homophobia) and mention of self-harm
10/5/2015: Made some minor edits.
He's not here yet.
Anna sighed and lowered her wrist.
It was mid-afternoon and Hans was late.
Granted, there was still time until the movie began, but at the rate things were going, Anna wasn't certain if they'd be able to catch dinner. She sighed and settled back against the bench, watching other people walk into the mall with muted interest. She spied a man and woman walking close to each other and wondered if they were also on a date. Anna bit her lip. A sliver of anxiety wormed its way into her chest.
It was Saturday morning and the mall was busy so everywhere she looked, she noticed everyone going in with someone. She, on the other hand, was relegated to sitting on a bench beside the entrance, all by her lonesome.
At seventeen years old, she shouldn't have been so nervous.
But at seventeen years old, she had yet to go on her first date.
The last—and only—time she had asked anyone out had been a girl she knew in sophomore year.
It hadn't ended well. The jives and leers had actually worsened after that day.
Anna clutched her purse tighter and looked around, nibbling on her bottom lip. No one seemed to notice her. She inhaled deeply and fingered a braid.
C'mon Anna, no need to be such a sad clown about everything. He probably just got caught up in traffic.
Anna twisted her purse strap and checked her messages. The last one had been ten minutes ago and Hans had reassured her that he'd be there soon.
She rummaged through her bag and pulled out a mirror. Her face looked a bit pale, but that could have been her makeup. She'd tried to make her freckles less obvious.
A horn suddenly blared and Anna jumped. She whirled around to see a white sports car race by. A few seconds later, her phone buzzed.
"Parking."
Delight exploded in Anna's chest and she hurried to respond.
"I'll be in front of the entrance!"
Anna sprung off the bench after hitting send, heading to the glass doors. She bounced in place as people passed her by, eyes searching for—
"God, I hate parking!"
Her heart skipped a beat. Dressed in a sleek white blazer and slacks, topped with a gold tie, Hans looked even handsomer than usual.
"Hans!" Anna rushed forward as Hans dashed across the street. Without missing a beat he caught her in his arms as she jumped into them. She buried her face in his shoulder, cheeks glowing pink. "You made it!"
Hans laughed and squeezed her waist. "Sorry about the tardiness. My dad wanted to talk to me before I left." Anna pulled back to see him roll his eyes. "He loves to go on and on."
Anna giggled and patted his arm. "Well, don't worry about it. We still have like twenty minutes before the movie starts."
Hans's expression softened. He pulled Anna closer and kissed her cheek. Anna's face grew scarlet and her heart beat faster.
"Thank you for being patient with me," he said.
Anna brushed her hair back, averting her gaze. "Y-you're the one who asked me out, so it's the least I could."
"And it seems I made the right choice," Hans replied with a wink.
Anna giggled and tugged on his arm. "C'mon you flatterer, let's go get some snacks and seats. I don't want to miss the previews!"
Hans gave her a toothy, white smile. Anna ducked her head shyly, her cheek brushing against the fabric of his sleeve. She could smell his cologne and wondered if it was something expensive. It probably was, everything about Hans spelled "class."
As they walked into the mall together, Anna slowly relaxed, a tender smile curling on her lips.
He's here.
He's here.
Anna held on tight to the slender hand in her grip, knowing that her own shook like a leaf. The hair on the nape of her neck prickled. Her chest hurt, a tightness squeezing just below her sternum. Behind her, the crowd was picking up in volume again now that the intermission was ending. But the roar and cheer faded to a buzz as she and Elsa stepped down the cold hallway. Goosebumps rose up her arms and it felt as if every voice fell to a hush.
She knew no one was looking at her, no one except Elsa. She knew the tension rising in her gut was irrational, provoked only by ill-buried memories. There weren't a dozen eyes trained on her—watching her, scrutinizing her. She was safe with Elsa.
The sweat rolling down the back of her neck felt like the wine dripping down her arm, splashing onto the plush red carpet. The narrow white walls widened, turning beige-gold and stretching up, a chandelier replacing fluorescent lights. Her heart thudded against her chest, racing with her thoughts.
Don't freak out. Come on Anna, there's nothing wrong. Elsa's with you and you're going to be fine. Hans probably didn't even seeyou.
But what if he had and he wasn't alone?
Anna stiffened and her heartbeat came to a stop. A cold flash swept through her body and nausea roiled in her stomach. She swore she heard laughter.
Now's not the time to freak out Anna. Elsa needs you to listen. So buck up and—
"Anna?"
Anna blinked, eyes refocusing on the gray floor before her. The cold of the stadium rushed back, traveling down her arms and pulling her away from the warmth and shine of lush rooms. She suddenly realized she had stopped sometime during their walk, still holding Elsa's hand. Anna swallowed and licked her lips. Her throat was dry. How long had she been standing there?
Anna turned to see Elsa watching her, her brow creased with worry. Her blue eyes were wide and her lips parted, as if she wanted to say something more. Anna's knees wobbled at the look of concern, but she forced a smile and squeezed Elsa's hand.
"It's okay Elsa. I'm fine, I was just—" Her breath caught and something flashed in Elsa's eyes. "Distracted," she finished uselessly.
Elsa ran her free hand through her hair, eyes glancing away. Anna's stomach flipped and with a start, she noticed Elsa was wearing gloves. She frowned. Had Elsa ever worn gloves before?
Maybe she's just cold.
But the black silk stood out like a stain upon Elsa's fingers.
Yeah, she's probably just cold.
They were in a hockey stadium and the weather had been dreadful. The rain had been relentless and Elsa looked terrible. Anna regarded her girlfriend out of the corner of her eye. Elsa's skin was a sickly hue and her hair, normally well-kept and silky, was disheveled. The bags under her eyes made Anna's chest ache. Elsa wore her coat as well, but underneath the dark garment, Anna could tell she was shivering.
But still, her mind argued, Elsa didn't get cold.
Anna pushed down the uneasiness in her gut. There was nothing wrong, she told herself.
"Anna?"
Anna blinked again. Elsa stared at her with apprehension, clutching her braid with her free hand. Anna winced when she realized Elsa's other hand was shaking in her grip. She needed to focus.
"I'm here," she assured. She tugged on Elsa's hand once and her girlfriend leaned against her. Anna buried her nose in Elsa's hair, letting out a long, heavy exhale. "I'm sorry I'm being so weird right now."
"That's okay," Elsa said. She squeezed her hand. "What, um—" she cleared her throat, "what now?"
Anna drew back, frowning at the catch in Elsa's voice. The trembling in Elsa's fingers hadn't stopped.
Anna glanced up and down the hallway, and was glad to find it absent.
"Did you want to talk?" she asked. She frowned when Elsa flinched and pulled her in closer. "Elsa, I'm not—" she licked her lips and shook her head, "I'm not mad at you. Honest."
"How can you not be?"
The crack in Elsa's voice made Anna's heart drop. Elsa bowed her head and tucked her bottom lip between her teeth, biting down hard. The calm, collected demeanor her girlfriend normally exhibited was absent, snuffed out from the past few days.
Anna stared. She wasn't used to seeing Elsa look so vulnerable.
"I thought I did something wrong..."
Elsa glanced up at her in alarm. She gripped the front of Anna's jacket. "What? No, Anna, no! You didn't do anything wrong at all." Her lips quivered and Elsa's blue eyes turned glassy. "Why would you think that?"
It wouldn't be the first time I screwed up.
Anna shoved the thought away as soon as it came and shrugged, averting her gaze to the floor. "Well, you got upset after you gave me your anniversary gift. When I reacted," she winced, "badly." Anna lifted her eyes and her shoulders dropped. "I'm sorry. I really do love your gift."
She reached under her shirt and pulled out the simple chain. "See?"
Elsa froze. She stared at the heart-shaped necklace, as if she couldn't believe it was hanging right in front of her. Anna didn't blame her. At first, she hadn't considered taking it with her. But the look on Elsa's face, the hopeful glimmer in her eyes when she had said:
"I have something for you."
—had made Anna snatch the necklace from its case. The cool metal pressed against her sternum felt both heavy and light. Anna's insides squirmed from having it, but she didn't want to let it go.
Gloved fingers reached up and caressed the silver chain.
Elsa's eyes seemed to be permanently misty. Anna's mouth went dry and she found it difficult to swallow. Elsa lips quivered into a smile.
"It suits you."
Anna's heart hammered in her chest.
"Wear it for me?"
Elsa's bright blue eyes kept her grounded. She threaded her fingers through the ones holding her necklace. "Do you want to talk now?" she asked, keeping the urgency out of her voice. The last thing she wanted was to push Elsa like last time, outside her bathroom door.
Elsa nodded, exhaling shakily. "I owe you an explanation." Her whole body sagged.
Anna squeezed her hand and gestured to the wall. "Want to sit down?"
Elsa frowned. "It would be best. It's going to be a long talk…"
Worry gnawed at Anna's gut. She looked away so Elsa wouldn't see the expression on her face and led them to a spot that was relatively clean. Elsa slumped against the wall, her knees buckling from under her. Anna frowned and slid down next to her, placing her bag beside her. She wrapped an arm around her girlfriend's shoulders and pulled her in.
"You okay?" she whispered.
Elsa fiddled with her gloves. "I'm fine," she mumbled. "I just don't know where to start."
Anna's expression softened. She gently nudged the side of Elsa's face with her nose. "Hey," she breathed, cupping her chin and lifting her face. "You don't need to tell me now if you're not feeling up to it. Elsa, I'll..." Anna sucked in a breath, drawing up all the emotion she'd built up these past few days, "I'll wait for you. I'll wait however long it takes until you're ready to talk. Or be with me again or whatever."
Tears gathered at the corners of Elsa's eyes. Anna's heart twisted at the sight. She was about to reach over and brush the droplets away when gloved fingertips cupped her cheeks.
Huh?
Gently, cold hands pulled her forward and into a soft kiss.
Anna's mind short circuited. Her eyes fluttered shut. Touch took over. Full lips moved against hers, capturing her bottom lip and caressing plush skin. A thumb stroked just along her cheek. Anna shivered and moaned. Elsa pulled away and Anna blinked, dazed.
"How did I get so lucky?" Elsa breathed.
Anna laughed, taken aback by the kiss. A blush crept onto her cheeks and she tucked her hair behind her ear. "I'd say I'm the lucky one."
Her girlfriend sniffed. "You have no idea how wrong you are," she said, and her voice cracked.
Anna slid her hands to Elsa's cold cheeks and pressed their foreheads together. "Don't sell yourself short," she whispered, then brushed her lips against the ones trembling before hers.
They spent a few moments like that before Elsa pulled away and inhaled deeply.
"I guess I should start at the beginning."
Anna gave a half-grin. "Couldn't hurt," she tried to joke.
Her words wrangled a smile out of Elsa before the blonde stared down at her fingers and began to speak. "I...you know I'm wealthy right?"
Anna nodded, leaning her cheek against Elsa's shoulder and watching something play across Elsa's face.
"Well, money comes with a lot of things." Elsa wrung her hands. "A lot of expectations, at least when it came to my family. My parents' employees and coworkers, they had a lot of respect for my father and mother. I wanted so badly to live up to their expectations." She blinked several times and Anna tightened her grip, laying a soft kiss on her coat-clad shoulder.
A few seconds passed where it was just Anna listening to Elsa breathe.
"But when I was a kid, I used to be very fidgety. I was very nervous when meeting new people. My parents thought I was just shy at first." She gulped audibly, eyes losing focus. "But then I started school."
And things got worse?
Anna frowned. She wasn't oblivious.
Elsa deliberated for a few moments, chewing on the inside of her cheek with a pensive expression. Then, running a hand through her hair, she sighed and said, "I...had difficulty speaking with other people, especially my peers. Every time I'd introduce myself, I'd become fraught with nerves." She clenched her teeth. "My parents had raised me with a very strict conscience for etiquette you see, and that's something I carried with me all the time." She inhaled and then exhaled, running a shaky hand through her hair, then pinching the bridge of her nose. "That's something they never seemed to realize, on top of this… general uneasiness I had, I suppose, that never quite went away."
Anna bit her lip. "Elsa?"
Elsa sniffed and tugged her gloves off. Anna glanced down. The black fabric slipped from Elsa's hands, revealing familiar pale skin. But then Elsa pulled down her sleeves just past her wrist and Anna stiffened. Along the inside of Elsa's wrists were patches of angry, blotched skin, as if it had been scratched and pulled.
"Elsa, what..." Anna reached down, fingertips gracing the reddened flesh. Elsa flinched and she drew back, staring up at her girlfriend in confusion.
Elsa held her hands to her chest. "Whenever I got really nervous or worried or- or anything, really, I'd pick at my hands. It was an itch I could never get rid of. Usually around here." She brushed her thumb over her veins, grimacing. "I bled once."
Anna jerked back, eyes widening as her jaw dropped in shock. "What?"
Elsa chuckled, but the sound was bitter and hollow. "Not like that. I didn't mean to. I was just so anxious I scratched my hands harder than I usually did. I honestly didn't want to do that. I started crying so hard that my mother came and found me in my room like that. She panicked and told my father what happened."
"He didn't get mad at you did he?" Anna asked.
Elsa shook her head. "No, he wasn't one to lose his temper. They took me to see a specialist." Her shoulders bunched up to her ears. "I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder at age eight."
"Oh." Her response was flat and distant.
It sounded completely inefficient to Anna's ears. But she didn't know what else to say. The reality of Elsa's situation was just starting to hit her. She blinked, eyes flicking down to Elsa's hands, glancing over the skin and wondering how often Elsa used to pick at it. A numbness spread in Anna's chest, thoughts beginning to buzz and race around in her head.
That young? And that long? How bad did things get?
Elsa shifted, drawing her knees up to her chest and staring into the distance. "At first they just had me talk to someone—a therapist. And it seemed fine for a while. I got better at communicating with others, even if I did hesitate. But we moved schools often and I—" she dug her nails into her pants, grinding her teeth, "—I hated that. I hated how often we moved. I know my mother noticed how sullen I would become, but I felt guilty whenever the topic came up that I would just tell her I was fine. I couldn't exactly say I didn't want to move again. It was part of their job."
Anna frowned and gently cupped Elsa's cheeks. She turned her face so they could see eye to eye. The watery, blue depths caused a pang in her chest. "Hey," she began softly, "you didn't have anything to feel guilty about. You were just a kid." Elsa's lips quivered and Anna brushed back a stray tear. She offered a small smile. "Wanting a stable home life isn't a crime, you know?"
Elsa chuckled weakly and leaned over, kissing the corner of Anna's mouth. "You're too sweet Anna."
Anna shrugged and shifted, motioning for Elsa to lay her head on her shoulder. "Nah, I just know these things."
Elsa groaned, covering her face with her hands. "Oh god, I'm so sorry Anna. You're an orphan. Of course you'd understand something like that. I—"
Anna pressed a finger to her lips. "Hey. Not now. We're not talking about me, okay?" She glared when Elsa opened her mouth to protest. "No, don't do that. Don't distract yourself with my troubles. You weren't finished were you?"
Elsa grimaced, but nodded. She settled back down against Anna, tucking her head under her chin. "Okay, I- okay."
Anna kissed her temple. "Do you need a moment?"
Elsa shook her head, her blonde locks tickling Anna's nose. "It's fine. I'm fine. After a couple of years of therapy, it wasn't proving to be as helpful as my parents had hoped. I had trouble sleeping at night. I'd stay awake for hours and that affected my performance in school."
"Nightmares?" Anna's voice was hazy to her own ears. A chill raced down her spine and goosebumps rose on her arms despite the warmth of her jacket. Unconsciously, she shifted closer to Elsa, wanting—no, needing, to know that she was there.
"No, just restlessness," Elsa mumbled. "But it was still...disappointing. Seemed like everything I did was one big disappointment." She grabbed Anna's jacket, knuckles turning white. "It hurt to know I wasn't living up to their expectations—anyone's expectations. They didn't say it, but I could tell how sad they were." She hiccupped. "It was my father's idea to try medication."
Anna frowned. Something nagged at her brain. A rattling drew her attention and she watched Elsa withdraw a couple of orange bottles, half-filled with differently colored and shaped pills. A memory jolted through her—the flash of Elsa putting away one of those bottles when the two had met before the vending machine.
So that was her medication?
Anna swallowed. "So, uh, I'm assuming they worked for you?" She gestured to the bottles. "Since you still have them?"
Elsa nodded, putting away her medication in her bag. "These ones I have here are ones I've been on for four years. I started some different ones when I was about...thirteen? Fourteen? I can't remember the exact year. It was rough at first." Elsa let out a bitter laugh. "A lot of people don't understand what it's like to have an anxiety disorder. The first doctor my parents went to didn't explain the side effects of taking medication well enough. It helped me function yes. I could socialize with people, the anxiety was a little quieter, and the urges not as strong. Thoughts of failure lessened, calmed. But the medication made it even harder to sleep. I gained weight. More...more weight than I wanted. I was just hungry all the time. At the same time, I would get so nauseous at the thought of eating. Everything was up and down. Sometimes I never wanted to leave my bathroom."
Anna's eyes widened with every word, horror settling in. "All that? When you were barely a teenager?"
Elsa nodded and rubbed her eyes. Her nose was turning red and sniffles escaped her. Anna's stomach twisted at the sight and she tightened her grip around Elsa's shoulders, rubbing the cloth of her coat.
"I was so tired sometimes. I'd get dizzy and every time we'd have to go to another dinner party or attend some other social event for my family's company, I'd worry about embarrassing them or something."
Anna pursed her lips, anger beginning to buzz in her veins. "Your parents couldn't have, I don't know, just let you stay at home when you were feeling terrible?'
Elsa shook her head. "I didn't want them to do that. I didn't want to go with them sometimes, but that felt like an even worse choice." She curled into a ball at Anna's side.
"Hey, hey," Anna crooned. "It's okay Elsa, you're okay. None of it was your fault alright? The weight and lack of sleep. None of it." She enveloped Elsa into a tight hug and stroked her back. A whimper reached her ears. A vice clawed and wrapped around Anna's heart.
It hurt her to see Elsa like this,her composure fallen away completely. The regal woman she thought she knew had vanished.
"My parents were so upset when I wasn't getting better," Elsa sobbed against her chest.
Anna blinked, a sharp pang starting in her sides. The chill from before resurfaced.
"My father," Elsa's voice wavered, "he was strict before. I was so scared of failing him." Her eyes glazed over. "I was his only child and I was going to take his place as company leader one day." She gulped and Anna could hear the tremble in her voice. "But then things started getting confusing when I figured out I liked girls."
A painful familiarity rose within Anna. There was a crackling sound in her ears, like static, dredging up old memories and wounds to the surface. The sound of shrill laughter echoing from far away, down a long hallway, beat against her eardrums.
"Guess who's coming this way! Vanessa watch out, she'll jump you."
And over the boisterous egging and disgusted leers, a softer voice.
"Uh, I'm sorry Anna. I can't sit with you anymore."
Anna exhaled shakily, trying to focus on Elsa in her arms. A thought nagged and nagged at her that she knew where things were headed to.
"What happened?" she whispered. Elsa trembled, clutching her shirt. Anna threaded her fingers through silky hair, trying to calm her. "Elsa?"
Elsa sniffed, eyes shut tight. "I started getting frustrated. I didn't like meeting boys who were sons of my parents' friends or business associates or whatever. Knowing I liked girls made me hate it even more." She cringed and Anna squeezed her, rubbing her back. "They noticed my disinterest. My father especially."
"Did they—" Anna's hand stilled, "—were they ever...?" She averted her gaze, eyes glued to a spot on the floor.
But when fingertips touched her jawline she found herself staring back into Elsa's despondent gaze.
Elsa frowned, puffy-red eyes darting all over Anna's face. "Anna, you're pale," she said.
Anna's stomach rolled over. The words caught in her throat, her tongue feeling as if it was thick and dry. When Elsa continued to stare at her, perplexed, she gestured uselessly and mumbled, "Did they ever take out their frustrations...on you?"
Elsa was quiet for several moments, seemingly unable to tear her gaze away from Anna's. Anna could feel the dread weighing down in her stomach, getting heavier and heavier until, when she could no longer take it, she opened her mouth.
"No."
Anna snapped her jaw shut.
Elsa's eyes were distant and she stared at something over Anna's shoulder, slowly shaking her head. "No, they were never like that with me," she mumbled, laying her cheek back against Anna's shoulder.
Anna let out a shaky breath. She settled back against the wall and glanced up at the fluorescent lights, swallowing a lump in her throat. "That's good," she mumbled, then winced and stroked Elsa's head. "Well, not good. I mean, it doesn't sound like your parents didn't have your best interests in mind, but I'm happy to hear that they didn't—" her voice cracked and her vision blurred "—react like that."
Elsa sighed and her whole body sagged. Her limbs became listless and she tucked her head underneath Anna's chin. Anna absentmindedly continued rubbing her fingers in circles on Elsa's back, slow and gentle.
"They did have my best interests in mind," Elsa whispered. Anna pursed her lips. Her thumb brushed one of Elsa's bangs back and the other woman shuddered. "But after a while, they were more upfront about how nice this boy or that boy was. I think they wanted to leave me in the care of someone they knew and trusted." She trailed off, stiff under Anna's hands.
Anna frowned and tried to peer at her girlfriend's face. Tension was etched into every line, between the crease of her brows and her pale lips. "But they weren't your choices, were they?"
The shuddering breath that Elsa released told her all she needed to know. Still, Elsa continued, voice barely reaching Anna's ears.
"Something...happened. In my last year of school, I got fed up. I couldn't stand their constant pressuring anymore. About school, about suitors, moving, anxiety." Elsa's shoulders started to shake.
"What happened?" Anna's voice was small.
A tense moment of silence.
"I came out to them one night. It was raining."
"Oh." The color drained from Anna's face. Her heart thudded painfully and she could feel her blood rushing in her ears. Her fingers were numb. "Oh, Elsa, did—"
"We were expected to attend a dinner party. I refused to go, not when I knew I'd just be forced to talk with people I had no interest in. My father lost his temper then, at last. He told me he wouldn't accept it. Not like that." Elsa's voice cracked again. "He said if I was going to keep 'acting' this way, then I should just stay in my room." She whimpered. "And so I did…"
Anna's arms trembled. She buried her face in Elsa's hair. Her throat felt dry and wet at the same time. The tears in her eyes stung. She wished she could draw Elsa closer.
"Kai Anderson, a friend of the family, came by a few hours later." Elsa shook like a leaf in the wind. "They collided with another car on the way there." She sobbed.
Anna blinked rapidly, feeling two tears trail down. "Elsa, oh gosh. I'm so sorry."
"Everything spiraled down from there," Elsa cried. Anna tightened her grip on her, rocking them back and forth. "I was meant to succeed them as CEO, but everything to do with their work or the house we currently lived in, it all just reminded me of them! I-If I hadn't gotten so angry that night—"
"No," Anna hissed. Elsa stiffened, her words trailing off into small whimpers. Anna ground her teeth, refusing to let any tears fall. She needed to concentrate on Elsa right now. "No, don't think like that. It's not your fault. You couldn't have predicted what happened." She exhaled shakily, placing a soft kiss on Elsa's head.
Elsa shook, her cries increasing. Anna whispered soothing words to her, listening to her sobs, patient as they stayed like that for several minutes. She distracted herself from certain thoughts by looking up and down the hallway or stroking Elsa's hair. She wished they were somewhere more private, but if Elsa needed her here then here was where she'd be.
At last Elsa's sobs began to die down. She rubbed her eyes, trying to stop the tears. When she spoke again however, her voice still quavered.
"And when I gave you your anniversary gift and y-you reacted like that. I remembered my father. My parents and everything. All those years of school and anxiety, taking medication, and finding out I liked girls. Getting frustrated with them because I could never live up to their expectations!" Elsa's voice cracked and she took in several shuddering breaths. "I couldn't make them happy no matter how hard I tried!"
Anna flinched. She wished she could go back in time and change her reaction. Rather than sit there stiff and being overwhelmed with memories, she wished she had been happy.
"I-I'm sorry," she stuttered. "I didn't mean to upset you Elsa, or set you off. I'm sorry."
Elsa shook her head furiously, clinging to her. "No, no. It's not your fault." She hiccuped and finally pulled back, staring up at Anna. "It was an accident. You couldn't have possibly known I'd react so terribly." Her lips quivered. "I'm sorry about our anniversary Anna. For telling you to go away and shutting you out these past several days."
Anna touched their foreheads together. "Don't worry about it. I can understand why you did that now." She tilted her chin and pressed her lips to Elsa's brow. "That's the only thing that's changed between us you know?"
"Huh?"
Anna smiled slightly. "I know better now, so I can be there for you when you need it."
Elsa trembled. "Oh, Anna." She let out a hoarse giggle, laying her cheek against Anna's jacket. "Are you sure I'm not the lucky one?"
"We both are," Anna said. She drew back, thumbs brushing away a few tears that still leaked from Elsa's eyes. She gave her a watery smile, lifting the blonde's face until their gazes met. "Feel better?"
Elsa's lips quivered into a smile, big, blue eyes glimmering with affection and lingering anxiety. She inhaled shakily, lifting her hands to grasp Anna's. "I'll be okay," she said, voice hoarse from crying.
Anna's grin widened and she leaned forward, pecking Elsa's lips. "I know you will. And I'll be right here for you every step of the way." Her expression faltered and she bit her lip, worrying it between her teeth. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to help you Elsa a-and that our anniversary dinner made you panic."
Elsa shook her head, shutting her eyes for a moment. When she reopened them, Anna recognized the stoic look. "You didn't know. Barely anyone does actually. I don't talk about my parents much and your gift triggering a panic attack?" The resolve in Elsa's eyes strengthened. "It was just an unfortunate accident, nothing more." Her expression faltered and she brushed Anna's cheek with the back of her hand. "I'm sorry I worried you. I should have told you sooner."
Anna shook her head, cupping Elsa's hand. "Hey, none of that. Like you said, it was an accident." Her eyes hardened. "And you don't have to tell me anything you don't feel comfortable talking about." Anna shrugged. "Everyone's got secrets. You're not at fault for anything. You're not, you know, obligated to tell me about personal stuff."
Elsa's smiled widened slightly and the warmth in her eyes eased the tension in Anna's shoulders. "I feel better that I did though."
Anna's heart lodged itself somewhere between her throat and her sternum. "I'm glad. Flattered. Ecstatic." She leaned forward and nuzzled their noses together until a small giggle left Elsa's lips. "Thank you for telling me."
Elsa let out a breathy sigh, lips brushing against hers with how close they were. "Thank you for listening." Her eyes burned with an emotion so strong it sent Anna's heart thundering in her ears. "And for waiting for me Anna."
Anna blushed darkly, swallowing a lump in her throat. "Technically, you were the one waiting for me tonight," she said.
Elsa laughed. Or tried to. There were still tears in her eyes and her voice was hoarse from crying. She sniffed halfway through and pressed her hand to her mouth, trying to muffle the odd, choking sound.
Anna's expression softened. She leaned down and brushed her lips against Elsa's. The shiver that ran through her when Elsa sighed into the kiss caused her to moan softly. She pulled back and grinned when a smile teased the corner of Elsa's mouth. Elsa snuggled against her and Anna leaned against the wall.
"Do you want to go back to the game?" she asked. "We don't have to, but I don't think we can stay in the hallway forever."
Elsa was about to respond when something beeped from her pocket. Anna watched her smile turn sheepish as she took out her phone and glanced it.
"My friends are wondering if we're okay," she said, sighing as she slipped it back into her pocket.
Despite herself, Anna couldn't help but feel disappointed. She still had a surprise waiting for Elsa in her bag, but it could wait. She'd surprise Elsa later, maybe with dinner and drinks. And she had wanted to wait until Elsa had felt one hundred percent okay again. But the shaky smile on her girlfriend's tear-stained cheeks gave her hope.
At last, Anna gently urged Elsa to stand, smiling her thousand-watt smile.
"Then it's about time we watched some teeth fly!"
A whistle blew sharply in the air, causing several people to scream and cheer. The scoreboard flashed with a point towards the home team and Elsa found herself torn between being anxious around so many bodies and delighted at the feel of Anna's hand in hers.
She ducked down the steps and spotted Belle and Adam just off to the wayside. She called out to them just as another wave went through the crowd. Belle spotted her and immediately pulled on Adam's shirt.
"Are you two okay?" her friend asked, clearing the two seats beside her from her bag and Adam's jacket. "You were gone for quite a bit."
Elsa grinned. "We're fine."
The undercurrent of certainty was foreign on her tongue, but she relished it. Belle grinned and a twinkle sparked in her eyes, as if she had read Elsa's mind. She gave the blonde a discreet thumbs up as the two of them sat down.
"Thank you," she mouthed.
"It was all you," Belle whispered back.
"We saved your seats," Adam said. His eyes flicked to the game, trying to keep track of the score. "It was really convenient that Anna had her seat near ours." He eyed Belle and Elsa could see the silent question in his gaze.
"You didn't have anything to do with this did you?"
Belle gave him a slight glare as if to say, "Don't look at me. I'm innocent."
Adam shrugged and sipped from his soft beverage. "Everything worked out for the better then. By the way, here," he shoved a bag of popcorn into Elsa's hands, "enjoy yourself for a change."
Elsa beamed and turned to Anna beside her. Her girlfriend's eyes were rapidly darting over the ice rink and the stands, bottom lip tucked between her teeth. Elsa frowned, a thought nagging at her mind. She shrugged it off. There would be time for a discussion like that later. And besides, after such an emotional outpouring, she was, frankly, exhausted. All she wanted to do right now was enjoy what was left of their date. She squeezed Anna's hand and those blue-green eyes darted back to her.
Elsa ducked her head down so Anna could hear her over the roar of the crowd. "You okay?"
Anna grinned crookedly at her. "I'm okay." She lifted Elsa's hand and kissed her knuckles. "Now that you're better, I'm definitely better."
Elsa's cheeks pinked and butterflies fluttered in her stomach. A giddiness overtook her and she leaned over to peck Anna's lips. The smile there widened. Anna scooted over until their hips touched and their shoulders brushed. Elsa placed the bag of popcorn on their laps and leaned her head atop Anna's as they both turned back to the game.
"Which one is your brother?"
Anna hummed and munched on a buttery kernel. "He's, uh—" several people behind them jumped up and shouted as one of the opposing players raced to the home goal. Another player followed him on his heels and snatched the puck away. "That one," Anna giggled and pointed.
Elsa tilted her head and followed the player's movement. From her point in the stands and with his body equipped with so much gear, Anna's brother looked no different from any of the other players. The most she could from this distance was that he was...big? Tall? He definitely had the build of a sports player. An elbow nudged her and she glanced at Anna.
"Relax, you'll get to meet him later," Anna said. "And don't worry, he may seem rough but he's the biggest teddy bear you'll ever meet."
The color drained a bit from Elsa's face. She squirmed and chewed on a kernel to occupy herself and gather her thoughts. The past few days had prevented her from being capable of meeting Anna's brother at the airport.
And if I'm right about him, I doubt he's happy about that at all.
There was a certain layer of protectiveness that Anna's family and her close friends seemed to have around her. Elsa frowned, her earlier suspicion wriggling about. She bit the inside of her cheek. Her anxiety was threatening to get the best of her again and after her emotional outburst, she doubted she'd be able to enjoy the rest of the game. So Elsa squeezed Anna's hand and focused her attention on the rink. What questions she had for Anna, they could wait. Her eyes darted to the side.
I doubt Anna wants to talk about whatever is on her mind right now anyway.
Anna's face was screwed up in concentration. There was a line creased onto her forehead and her jaw worked back and forth. Though her gaze was on the rink, Elsa could see some part of her mind was elsewhere. She chewed the inside of her cheek.
A sound caught her attention and she winced as a few people behind her stood up and started flailing. One of them even threw popcorn.
Elsa leaned towards Anna. "What's going on?"
Anna blinked at her and glanced over her shoulder before shrugging. "The other team scored." A grin tickled the edge of her lips and despite her nerves, Elsa was relieved to see her girlfriend smile. "Never been to a hockey game before?"
Elsa chuckled and shook her head. "I'm afraid I don't know much about hockey. Or any kind of sports really."
Anna's grin widened. "Want me to be your honorary professor on the subject of hockey?"
Elsa laughed and even though it was drowned out by the roar of the crowd as the home team sweeped across the ice to the opposite goal, she saw Anna's eyes sparkle.
"Should I call you Professor Bjorgman or Professor Corona?"
Anna giggled and leaned her head on her shoulder. They settled into a comfortable, low-key conversation, the redhead pointing out who was who, or who did what, and what the rules and intents of the game were. Elsa's eyes shifted from the arena to Anna whenever she would point out a particular triumph for the home team. As the game went on she noticed Anna's energy increase. Though she kept their hands linked, Anna would clench her other hand into a tiny fist and shake it excitedly. She even bounced in her seat a few times, tracing Kristoff's figure several times throughout the match.
In truth, Elsa wasn't exactly into the spirit of hockey, but holding Anna's hand throughout the match lifted her own.
By the time the last quarter of the hockey game had rolled around, Elsa was squirming in her seat. Her eyes darted around, following the players and trying to keep up. To her surprise, she found herself perking up every time Kristoff and his teammates scored a goal. A smile was etched across her face even with her anxiety about being surrounded by so many people. Anna was on her feet next to her, jumping up and down and cheering for the home team. Elsa shot her girlfriend an adoring look.
I guess we've both calmed down.
Her brow furrowed when she glanced at the timer. In about ten minutes she would be meeting Kristoff. Her stomach twisted and she sipped her drink to calm her nerves.
She wanted to make a good first impression. After essentially bailing on Anna on Sunday, she wasn't sure how to approach her girlfriend's family. Though she knew Anna didn't fault her in the slightest and would object to calling her sudden, depressive episode "bailing," Elsa was adamant on showing she was an equal partner to Anna.
Especially if—
"SCORE!"
Elsa jumped in her seat as Adam stood up and roared. Her eyes widened when Anna mimicked him and began bouncing up and down as one of the home players surged across the rink. The crowd screeched into a loud chorus as the clock winded down.
Elsa bit back a smile as Anna whooped besides her, face flushed and arms in the air. She glanced at Belle and they exchanged amused expressions.
"Happy?" Belle mouthed to her.
Elsa couldn't refrain from grinning. She was about to respond when the announcer boomed over the arena.
"Mountain Stars win!"
Anna shrieked and pulled Elsa into a crushing hug. Elsa let out a strangled noise of surprise and hugged her girlfriend back, hands clumsily rubbing her shoulders.
"They did it! They did it!" Anna squealed in her ear. Elsa's grin returned when she felt a button nose nuzzle her cheek. "Oh gosh, I can just imagine the look on Mama's face when he tells her."
A warm glow spread up from Elsa's chest to her cheeks. She brushed her lips on the nearest bit of freckled skin and murmured, "I'm sure she'll be ecstatic."
And maybe the excitement over winning will allow Kristoff to go easy on me.
Anna pulled back and pecked her lips. Elsa flushed and tapped her fingers on the back of Anna's jacket, her stomach twisting and fluttering. "I'm guessing I'll be meeting your brother now?" She couldn't stop the little catch in her voice.
Anna's expression softened. She cupped Elsa's cheek and gave her a crooked grin. "Hey, come on now. I know he looks like a bear, but he's a real teddy underneath." Her thumb brushed just beneath Elsa's eye and the gentle action eased her nerves. "He'll love you, I'm sure of it," Anna quipped.
Elsa blinked and tried to catch her breath. "Okay," she mumbled.
Things felt so different in such a short amount of time. Her mind had trouble keeping up.
"And if he doesn't—"
Elsa blinked as Anna straightened and scowled.
"—he'll have to deal with one really annoyed and really protective little sister."
Anna's cheeks puffed up as she smacked her fist into her palm. Elsa let out an unladylike snort and the redhead beamed. Anna settled back down beside her and together they watched the last few minutes of the match. Elsa grinned as the timer ticked down, several voices cheering on the home town. Cries rose into a hum as the announcer joined with the crowd in counting down the seconds.
"5!"
"4!"
"3!"
"2!"
"1!"
She felt Anna's hands tremble in her grasp just as he said:
"And the Mountain Stars win!"
Again, the people behind Elsa jumped up and cheered. She twitched and glanced over her shoulder at them, an awkward, half-smile on her lips. She guessed she was in the vicinity of several hardcore fans and tried to push down the instinctual anxiety that arose from the noise and atmosphere. Anna's thumb rubbed circles into her skin and she redirected her attention to her.
Anna's eyes were soft. Her eyes flicked to the group behind them and understanding flashed across her face. She leaned in close and Elsa's smiled widened a bit. "Let's go?" Anna asked, breath brushing the blonde's ear.
Elsa swallowed and nodded. She glanced at her friends and Belle met her gaze.
"Are you two leaving to meet Anna's brother?" she shouted over the crowd.
Elsa blinked, slightly disoriented from Belle's question. Then it occurred to her that Anna must have told them some things after they ran into her. Anna nodded and said, "We are. Do you two want to come with?"
Adam nudged Belle. "Her brother's on the team." There was a note of excitement in his voice.
Belle shot him a smirk before saying, "Yeah, we'll go." Adam let out a silent yes and began to push past them, clearing the way. As Belle moved to follow, she whispered to Elsa, "I figured it would be great if you had some moral support."
Elsa frowned and turned to walk down the row. "For?"
"You're the one who has to deal with being introduced to the family for once." Elsa gulped. Belle chuckled and pushed her forward. "You'll do fine."
"That's easy for you to say," Elsa grumbled. Belle laughed and Elsa shot her a glare before hurrying to catch up with Anna. Her girlfriend jumped a bit when she reached out and clasped her hand, but a quick look at her face and Anna smiled again.
"Don't worry, I'm on your side," she said. Elsa's heart fluttered a little.
They had to squeeze through excited or disgruntled attendees, but Anna's hand wrapped tightly around hers alleviated the pinch and vice of anxiety around Elsa's chest.
The night air was clear of rain, but the scent of the recent downpour still clung to the asphalt. Other people were already leaving the stadium and heading towards the parking lot, but several people still remained behind. Anna refrained from eyeing everyone too closely. Beside her, Elsa was staring up at the night sky. Belle and Adam trailed a bit behind, conversing in low tones. The petite woman was currently trying to rein in her boyfriend's excitement, her hands trying to catch his as they made wide, animated gestures. From what she could make out of their conversation, Adam was more than thrilled about meeting one of the players on the home team. Anna tuned herself out of their dialogue, pushing down her dismay that she couldn't share in his enthusiasm.
He's probably left by now.
The hand cupped in hers suddenly squeezed and pulled back her attention.
Elsa's face was pale. Anna wondered if it was a residue from their emotional conversation or from her nervousness about meeting Kristoff.
But then again, she does have anxiety.
Anna frowned. She squeezed the blonde's hand and was rewarded with a shaky smile. "Do you need anything? You don't look so good." Elsa shook her head. Anna's frown deepened. "You're sure? Your, uh, pills won't help in this case?"
Elsa let out a dry chuckle. For a second, Anna worried she had overstepped her boundaries, but her girlfriend just scooted closer and pressed her head into her shoulder. "No, I'm only supposed to take them at set times."
Anna relaxed a bit. Elsa didn't seem offended at her utter lack of knowledge on this subject. "You don't have anything that could help you?"
Elsa's brow furrowed. Her eyes stared into the streets and parking lot, gaze not focused on anything in particular. "I have some medication that's meant to offer quicker relief, but I'd rather not use it right now." Anna wanted to persist, but the tight lines on Elsa's forehead convinced her not to.
Instead, she asked, "Is there anything I can do?"
Elsa smiled at her and laid her head on her shoulder. "Hold my hand when we meet your brother so I don't jump out of my skin like a cat on Halloween?"
Anna perked up, a grin stretching her cheeks. She lifted their intertwined fingers and kissed the back of Elsa's knuckles. "Way ahead of you."
Elsa giggled and Anna stood still to enjoy the sound of it. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Belle shoot them an amused and slightly teasing smirk. Anna's cheeks turned pink.
I wonder if Elsa's friends all have a bet on how much they can get away with teasing us. Or just me...
She looked away and a jolt of delight shot through her when she recognized a mop of dirty-blonde hair making its way through the crowd. Anna grinned as Kristoff sidled through the crowd of excited fans as discreetly as he could, face flushed and sweating. His eyes lit up when he spotted her.
"Anna! There you are!"
Elsa stiffened beside her. Her grip on Anna's hand tightened to the point she swore one of her bones cracked. Anna cringed and flexed her fingers. Elsa jumped and shot her an apologetic look.
"Sorry," she mouthed.
Anna flashed her a smile just as Kristoff came within breathing distance of them. Her nose curled in disgust as a familiar odor bypassed the scent of rain on cement and rushed up her nostrils.
"Oh god." Anna clamped her hand over her nose. Her eyes were already starting to water. "I forgot how much you stink after a game."
Kristoff halted and frowned. "I don't—"
"Yes you do!" she hissed. She gestured and he lifted his arm up to sniff at it. A mild look of disgust flashed across his face before he tried to cover it up and Anna crossed her arms over her chest with a satisfied look. "See? You're not getting near my girlfriend while you smell like wet dog."
Kristoff rolled his eyes. "I smell like sweat, not wet dog."
"Same difference."
He scoffed before shifting to glance over her shoulder. Anna forced a smile on her face as his expression hardened.
"I'm guessing this is…?"
Anna turned her head, giving the hand in hers a reassuring squeeze and said, "Yeah, this is—"
Elsa stepped forward and Anna blinked in surprise as she let go of their intertwined fingers and raised her hand in greeting. She only had a moment to mull over the empty feeling in her palm before her girlfriend spoke, voice clear and controlled.
"It's a pleasure to finally meet you in person Kristoff." Elsa smiled, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. "I'm Elsa. Elsa Arendelle."
She's back to being Miss Prim and Proper.
Anna bit the inside of her cheek. She glared over Elsa's shoulder at Kristoff, trying to convey how much trouble she would give him if he decided to be his usual self. He took one look at her before crossing his arms.
I swear, Kristoff if you—
"The one who I was supposed to meet at the airport? The girl I talked to on the phone before?"
Anna clenched her jaw. She recognized that tone in Kristoff's voice. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed Belle glance between them all worriedly. Anna moved closer to Elsa and placed a hand on her arm.
"Kris—"
Gloved fingers rested on hers before Elsa's voice cut in.
"Yes—" Elsa straightened to her full height, blue eyes flashing with determination, "—and I'd like to apologize for not being there to meet you at the airport."
Anna frowned. Elsa's tone held the professionalism she expected her girlfriend to use in class. Soft, but laced with a steel lining. Her brow was knit together and she regarded Kristoff with an almost challenging gleam.
But underneath Anna's fingers, she felt Elsa shaking.
Kristoff's eyes narrowed. Anna could practically hear the gears turning in his head. She rolled her eyes and faced Elsa, squeezing her arm.
"Hey, don't beat yourself up over it," she said. Elsa glanced at her and her brow furrowed, the smallest crack in her facade. Anna smiled and kissed her cheek. "You didn't have to come. It wasn't mandatory. And besides," she shot her brother a stern look, "she had a pretty good reason for not coming."
Elsa gave her a strained smile. "Anna you don't have to defend me." She placed her free hand atop Anna's and gently squeezed her fingers, a fondness in her eyes. "I did tell you I would be there for you."
Anna frowned at her, clutching her arm tighter. "But you were—"
Her words were cut off by Elsa leaning over and pressing her forehead against Anna's. Heat rushed to Anna's cheeks and she clamped her mouth shut. Her eyes darted to the side to see Kristoff watching them closely and Anna's neck burned with embarrassment when she guessed that Belle and Adam were looking too. But she pushed down her issue with people staring and concentrated on what Elsa was saying.
"Remember when I said you just needed to hold my hand when I was scared?"
Anna nodded, blinking slowly as Elsa drew back, a sheepish glint in her eyes. Her cheeks were pink too which put Anna slightly more at ease. She reached up and cupped Elsa's face, a shy grin curling on her lips.
"You know, you're making this unnecessarily hard for you," Anna said. She tried to keep her tone light in spite of the discomfort pressing against her chest. Elsa's smile relaxed and Anna relaxed with it. She glanced down at their hands and added quietly, "I'm starting to think you're just the teensiest bit stubborn."
"I'm going to stop you two before I vomit."
Kristoff's words cut straight through Anna's brain and centered her back in reality. She flushed, noticed Elsa flush too, and faced her brother. He still had his arms crossed and his eyes narrowed, but the distrust in them had lessened. He cleared his throat and held out his hand again. "Well, it's nice to finally meet you Elsa."
The tension in Elsa's muscles relaxed. Anna stood to attention as Elsa extended a hand and took Kristoff's. Elsa smiled and a single shake passed between them.
"Likewise."
Miss prim and proper Elsa indeed.
They released each other's hands and shared a small smile. Anna inwardly sighed in relief, loosening her grip on her girlfriend's arm.
Behind her, she heard Adam mumble to Belle, "I think we just missed something." She let out a quiet giggle and turned to beckon them forward. They had been hanging in the background throughout the conversation and Anna guessed they felt awkward.
Belle shuffled forward with more confidence than Adam, whose large, burly appearance stiffened with each step. Kristoff glanced at them and the standoffish edge to his body disappeared. He moved to Anna's side and leaned down to whisper in her ear.
"Friends of yours?" he asked.
Anna shook her head, grinning. "Friends of Elsa." She winked. "And fans of yours."
Kristoff straightened and frowned. There was a question in his eyes, but he didn't pry as Belle held out her hand and politely introduced herself. The three exchanged pleasantries and Anna watched with a hint of concealed glee as Adam mentioned he was a recently converted fan of the Mountain Stars. Elsa covered up her giggles as the two men descended into an awkward back and forth between fan and hockey player. The conversation faded from Anna's mind as she stared up at her girlfriend with a mix of adoration and relief.
This night is getting better bit by bit.
Kristoff cleared his throat and Anna refocused on him.
"Hey, so, some of the other players were going to have a little get together at this pizza parlor." He rubbed the back of his neck. "I was going to just invite Anna, but if you're all friends of hers, then I'm sure the guys wouldn't mind some new faces."
Woah.
Anna blinked several times. She had a hard time recalling when was the last time Kristoff had pushed himself to spend time with strangers. He liked being by himself, with the sole exceptions being his hockey team, family, or Sven.
Kristoff's eyes darted to her and then to her left. Realization dawned on her. She smiled gratefully at him and mouthed, "Thank you." He returned the gesture with a small smile of his own and shrugged.
He's trying, Anna thought. Even if he still has reservations, he's trying. Considering the way he acted the first few months after Hans, this is definitely better than nothing.
She nudged Elsa's side, aware that the blonde had been standing stiffly in silence. Elsa glanced at her and Anna grinned up at her before looking over her shoulder at Belle and Adam. "I think it's a great idea. Pizza sounds like the perfect way to end the night." When Elsa and her friends exchanged looks, Anna added in a singsong voice, "And I'm sure Adam would love to meet some of the other Stars."
The look the large, gruff man gave Belle almost made Anna laugh as much as Kristoff's disgruntled bashfulness. He rolled his eyes and turned around.
"Alright, let's go then. They're all by Pete's van."
While Kristoff led them down the damp parking lot, Anna took the time to entangle her arm with Elsa's and huddled close. Elsa's rigid posture relaxed completely and she shifted until their shoulders touched.
"See?" Anna made sure to keep her voice low so none of the others could hear. "That went fine."
Elsa let out a disgruntled noise. "Hardly," she said. She bit her lip, eyes darting to Kristoff. "I don't think your brother is very fond of me."
Anna kissed her cheek, a soft smile replacing her grin. "He'll come around." She glanced at Kristoff and was relieved to see him and Adam had picked up a conversation again. "Like I said, he's a teddy bear underneath everything."
Elsa nodded, gazing back ahead. "I'll try my best to win him over."
Anna frowned and traced Elsa's cheek with one finger. "You don't have to try," she stressed. Elsa grimaced. Anna's expression hardened and she said, "You are more than enough Elsa. Really. This whole thing has been wonderful. And knowing what I do now, I can easily say you've been wonderful too."
The beaming smile Elsa gave her sent Anna's heart racing. She buried her face in her girlfriend's shoulder to hide her blush. Elsa giggled and leaned her cheek atop Anna's head. They walked the rest of the way listening to Kristoff and Adam's conversation. Occasionally, Belle looked over at them and gave Anna such a knowing smirk that her blush refused to lessen.
As they were passing, Anna lifted her cheek away from the softness of Elsa's peacoat to see Kristoff's teammates hanging around Pete's silver van. She was about to call out to them and wave, but the grin curling on her lips froze and her heart dropped to subzero temperature. The hairs on the back of her neck rose. She smelled rainwater and tasted panic on her tongue. The urge to flee shot up her legs and her grip on Elsa's arm tightened like a vice.
"If you change your mind, here's my card. You're welcome to call me at any hour or just send me an email and we can arrange a time and place to discuss things further."
Even if they didn't sport the exact same sideburns as him, she would recognize one of the Westerguard brothers no matter what.
Max hadn't changed the last time she saw him at the dinner party anyway. He was currently speaking with one of Kristoff's teammates, a slender platinum-blonde known for his agility on the rink. Closer to the van were a few other players, fidgeting next to the car and looking uncomfortable with the exchange. Oscar stood by his brother, but what caught her breath was the figure just off to his side, hands tucked into his coat and a bored expression on his face.
Until his hazel eyes met hers.
Everything slowed to a crawl. The night air grew colder, like ice, and her chest tightened to the point where it felt almost suffocating. She was vaguely aware of Elsa stopping beside her and saying something, but the ringing in her ears drowned out her words.
Hans frowned, surprise flashing across his face before it was quickly replaced by annoyance. "I was hoping I wouldn't see you here today."
Anna let out a quiet, strangled noise. Her fingertips felt numb. "Hans—"
Kristoff strode forward faster than she could ever recall him doing so. His hands clenched into fists and his shoulders rose up. "What the hell are you doing here?" he growled.
"Kristoff—" Anna rushed after him and reached to grab his arm, "—don't, please." She heard someone move behind and startled when a hand clasped her shoulder. Anna jerked around to see Elsa staring at her, her brow creased into a worried frown.
"What's going on?" She glanced between Anna and Hans. "Do you two know each other?" Her voice sounded a little odd, a strange catch in it, but Anna couldn't pinpoint why.
She opened her mouth to speak, but the words died on her tongue. Her breathing came out in a small, white wisp and she watched it fade out, mouth moving uselessly. Elsa's frown deepened and she cupped her face. Anna blocked out the rest of the world, capable only of focusing on Elsa's pale blue eyes.
"Anna, you're shaking," she whispered.
Anna's eyes widened.
No, no, no.
Belle appeared at her side and the swiftness of her movements broke Anna's stupor. She glanced between the two of them, brow furrowing. "Elsa's right," she said. "You don't look too well Anna."
"I'm fine," Anna gasped. Relief flowed through her like water when she found her voice again. She placed her hands atop Elsa and smiled shakily. "There's nothing to worry about."
"She's right."
Oscar stepped forward, lips pursed. "We were just leaving." He half-turned to his brothers, a meaningful look in his eyes. "Weren't we Max?"
The older Westergard faltered, glancing at Kristoff with a wary look. "Uh…Yeah, we—"
"Need to get out of my sight," Kristoff interrupted. Anna winced at the sharp tone and felt a stone drop into her stomach. He wasn't going to let them off easy, she realized.
Belle looked around, apprehensiveness coloring her face. She turned to Elsa and tugged on her arm. "Are we missing something?" she asked.
Elsa blinked, the lines of her face drawn with confusion. "I don't know." She edged closer to Anna and Anna felt a shiver crawl up her spine when she saw Hans squint at the action. Elsa grabbed her hand and Anna felt herself being tugged back to her. "Anna, what's going on?"
Anna swallowed thickly. Her throat was dry and a painful lump formed halfway. She licked her lips, trying to find the right words, but a strange haze hung over her. It felt as if she were being pulled away from the scene and watching everything with a sense of detachment. Her head swam with scattered thoughts—several once under lock and key now scattering from the crevices of her mind.
Everyone was staring.
She was sure of it.
Their eyes bore into her back, burning and incessant. The ringing in her ears turned to laughter. Jeering. Taunts and teases. Her hands were so cold. A crash sounded in her ears and she heard a gasp echo through the dining room.
Her chest seized. Anna tightened her grip on the hand in hers until her knuckles turned white.
"Anna!"
Elsa's voice cut through the fog in her mind. Anna jerked her head up to see her hovering over, blue eyes wide with fright. Her legs wobbled, as if her bones were made of jelly. Elsa's arms around her waist were the only thing keeping her up. Behind her, Belle and Adam hovered, looking self-conscious and uncomfortable.
Kristoff was at her side in a flash, steadying her back with his large hands. "Anna, are you okay?"
Elsa slipped her arm up and around Anna's shoulder, tugging her close until Anna could smell her perfume. She tightened her grip around Anna's waist and pursed her lips. "I've got her."
The protective timbre in her voice brought a weak smile to Anna's face.
"Wait..."
Hans stared at them, realization dawning in his eyes. Next to him, Oscar's eyebrows rose up to his hairline. From the way his lips parted and mouthed a silent "Oh," Anna knew both brothers had come to the same conclusion.
"Her?"
The sole word echoed in the night.
Hans stared at Elsa as if she'd grown a second head. Anna grimaced at the mixed look of disgust and shock on his face. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Kristoff clench his hand into fists again. Kristoff's team and Elsa's friends hung in the background and she could feel their stares on her back. Max squirmed besides Hans, his discomfort with the situation growing by the second. He grabbed Hans's shoulder and pulled him back, hissing, "Hey, Hans, come on. Drop it and let's go."
Hans shrugged off his brother's hand and glared at him. "I don't need you telling me what to do." His eyes snapped back to Elsa and Anna bristled at the contempt darkening in them. "What do you see in her?" he asked.
A hot flash of anger surged through Anna's veins. Her head swam and the urge to sink her knuckles into Hans's face gripped her. Of all the things he could have said.
"What does he see in her?"
The anger left as soon as it came. Disgust coiled in her stomach. She shuddered. It was the cold. She was certain of that. Her palms tingled and she flexed her fingers to rid them of the numbness traveling through her.
"That's none of your business."
Elsa.
The arms around her tightened, bringing her close until she could feel her cheek pressing into Elsa's chest. Anna tilted her head up to behold blue eyes flashing like ice. Elsa's usual courteous manner was nowhere in sight.
"And," Elsa reached down and gripped Anna's hand, "I would appreciate if if you didn't speak to her like that."
Hans spluttered and his eyes widened in surprise. His composure broke as he glanced between her and Elsa, mouth open. Then his face hardened, his jaw clamped shut, and he rolled his eyes.
"Despite what you may think Elsa, Anna and I are well-acquainted with each other."
A red light flared in the back of Anna's mind. Hans and Elsa knew each other?
How?
Elsa tensed and Anna felt the stone in her stomach drop to the soles of her feet. She tugged on Elsa's hand, looking at her with wide eyes. "Don't listen to him," she said weakly.
Elsa blinked in confusion. "So you do know each other," she murmured.
Anna's chest clenched. "Yeah, but—"
"But it was a mistake on my part."
Elsa snapped her gaze to Hans and her eyes narrowed into chips of ice. Hans glared back, ignoring the shocked expressions around him. Oscar, however, glared at his brother, soft hazel eyes now bright with anger. Max's face creased into a look of disgust and exasperation.
Hans ignored them both.
"And if you want my advice Elsa, I'm preventing you from doing the same." He turned to stare at Anna and for a moment, her mind warped back to the time when those hazel eyes looked down at her with fondness. Then Hans scoffed and turned halfway. "Break up with her before she embarrasses you."
The ground vanished beneath Anna's feet.
She thought she heard someone gasp, but she wasn't certain. She thought it was Elsa, but she couldn't differentiate between now and then. Her ears were filled with the sound of a table crashing to the floor, glass shattering, and an entire room going silent.
"Get off the floor Anna. You're embarrassing me."
A flash flew by her and Anna barely had time to collect herself before two of Kristoff's teammates were holding him back.
"You ungrateful piece of shit, I'm gonna—!"
"Kristoff!"
Anna pushed herself out of Elsa's embrace, ignoring the cry of her name as she marched toward him. His teammates glanced at her worriedly, but she shook her head and gripped Kristoff's arm. "Kristoff, we're leaving."
Kristoff stared at her, halting in mid-struggle. His brown eyes widened and he opened his mouth, looking like he wanted to protest. She could hear the gears turning in his mind. She knew he wanted nothing more to hurt Hans like how Hans had hurt her, but Anna wanted out.
"But Anna—"
Something in her snapped. She clutched his arm tighter, feeling her blood boil beneath the surface of her skin. "We're leaving." The hairs on the back of her neck rose when she heard heels clack behind her. Anna pushed down the urge to turn around. She didn't want Elsa to see her so desperate and angry.
"We should go," Elsa said behind her. Her voice was soft. The night wind carried it like a hush.
Anna cringed at the dispassionate tone. It sucked the anger from her bones and left shame burning inside.
Max grabbed Hans's arm and jerked him back, spitting, "And it's about time we left too you brat."
Hans glared darkly at him and tried to shove him off. "I told you! I don't need you bossing me around."
"Too bad half-pint," Max growled. He pulled Hans roughly down the parking lost, ignoring his younger brother's comments.
Oscar made a move after them, then faltered. He'd been silent throughout the entire time, watching the scene unfold like a hawk. Anna met his gaze and shivered. But, perhaps out of mercy, he just nodded once and said, "I'm sorry."
He turned to follow his brothers and Anna felt relief surge through her veins as they disappeared.
"Please," Anna tried again, staring up at Kristoff with watering eyes. "Let's just go…"
At last the fight left his eyes. Kristoff's shoulders dropped and he sighed. He ran a hand through his hair before nodding. "Yeah, okay. Let's get out of here. Your truck's here right?"
She nodded.
"Guys, can one of you get it?"
Anna felt everything blur around her as one of the guys quietly agreed and took her keys. She distantly heard Kristoff talking to his teammates, giving directions on where they'd all be meeting up. She felt hands push her gently in the direction of Pete's van. No one said a word as they settled inside. She plopped herself into the backseat, pushing herself up against the window and looking out into the night as the engine revved up. Without being prompted, Kristoff turned on the stereo. Music hummed and filled the car. Anna refused to meet anyone's gaze as they began to drive out. She wrapped her arms around herself and pushed back the tears gathering behind her eyes.
"Anna?"
Elsa's timid voice brought her back to reality.
Anna bit her lip. A hand hesitantly touched her knee and she flinched at the sight of gloved fingers. Elsa pulled back her hand and Anna heard her take a breath. The seat creaked as Elsa shifted closer to her. Anna tensed again when an arm wrapped around her shoulders.
When she spoke again, Elsa's voice could barely be heard over the music.
"Are you...okay?"
Anna stayed quiet, staring out the window.
Elsa brushed her hair from her face and it made Anna want to cry. It stung. It stung to be held so tenderly because a part of her—in spite of all that had happened—still believed Hans's words.
What does she see in me?
"Anna?"
She kicked herself for not being able to meet Elsa's gaze. "Please Elsa," Anna whispered. Her voice cracked. "I don't want to talk about it right now."
There was a long second of silence and Anna hated the stares boring into her. Then lips touched her cheek briefly and Anna found one of her hands being gently pulled until fingers intertwined with her own. For her part, she didn't flinch when Elsa laid her head on her shoulder.
She just let her hold her hand.
A chorus of cheers, grunts, and slaps on the back echoed through the crowded pizzeria. Despite the abundance of noise and the large gathering of people, Elsa couldn't find it in herself to join in the cheer. Tucked in a corner seat at a table of rowdy hockey players, she was distracted by the downturn thoughts running through her head. The one thing that would have made it better was a happy girlfriend at her side.
Elsa pursed her lips and glanced over her shoulder. Anna had stowed away to the restroom as soon as she could, with Kristoff hot on her heels. Elsa had meant to follow, but a quick look from Kristoff had dissuaded her from doing so.
She's probably still upset.
Elsa frowned. She gripped her beverage tighter and ground her teeth together. The earlier rage from before returned swiftly. A childish, vindictive part of her wondered if she could convince Meg to key Hans's car, but the diplomat in her pointed out that no matter his actions, Hans would be the legitimate victim in such an act.
Her frown deepened.
Hans's remarks about Anna "embarrassing" him and that she would only do the same for Elsa sent a fire kindling in her gut.
Her suspicions—as out of place and paranoid as they had been—were confirmed. She had put two and two together after witnessing the spectacle between Anna and Hans. If Anna wasn't the ex-girlfriend Hans had told her about, then she was at least an ex of his.
And the way he talked about his ex...
Elsa turned back to glare at the table. She doubted Anna would be keen to talk about her ex-relationship so soon after that ordeal.
If she even wants to tell me about it.
Elsa sighed. The discussion with her therapist came flooding back. Specifically, Dr. Dahler's questioning about whether Anna was as new to this as Elsa was. Evidently, she wasn't, but given the animosity Hans had displayed, she doubted the relationship had been a good one for Anna, all of Hans's one-sided tales of his ex aside.
Anna had froze.
The sudden shift in her demeanor hadn't gone unnoticed by Elsa. She'd gone from being warm and happy with Elsa to stumbling on unsteady legs in seconds. The way her eyes had dilated when she'd seen the Westergards had sent alarm bells blaring in Elsa's mind. She'd gone pale and distant too. It was as if she hadn't even been present.
Elsa pressed her forehead against her knuckles, clutching her drink tighter. An ache pulsed in her temple and behind her eyelids. God, she was getting a headache from everything. The best thing to do would be to talk to Anna directly.
I told her about my problems. The least I can do is offer her support in return.
Elsa looked up when she heard footsteps. Anna and Kristoff walked back with stiff movements and from the way there was a space between them, she could only guess that the two had argued outside the restroom.
Elsa forced a cheerful look on her face as the two of them sat down, Anna sliding into the seat right next to her. "Welcome back," she said softly.
Anna shot her a smile, but it failed to reach her eyes. Elsa faltered, the edge of her mouth falling. She inched one hand down under the table and touched Anna's knee. The redhead twitched and Elsa drew her hand back, a pang hitting her chest. She was about to mutter an apology when she felt fingers grasp hers tightly. Elsa stiffened. She glanced at Anna's face.
Anna stared at the table, expression blank and lips thin. She squeezed Elsa's hand and Elsa felt her heart clench. Elsa scooched her chair closer and gave Anna's hand a gentle, reassuring pat before letting go.
Two paper plates plopped down in front of them, making them both jump.
"Eat your fill you two trolls!" one of the defensemen—Jeremy, if she recalled—said, pushing two plates with large pizza slices stacked on them towards the girls. He turned to Kristoff and shoved a pizza slice in his face. "You too, Reindeer King. Comfort food will turn that frown upside down."
Kristoff snorted before grabbing a slice and digging right in.
Anna bit her lip and looked around the table. In the light of the parlor, her freckles stood out on her pale cheeks. "How much did you guys order?"
"Enough for leftovers," Adam said, "and then some."
Kristoff grumbled around his food before swallowing. "Eat. You haven't eaten since breakfast."
Anna mumbled something under her breath and poked her plate. Elsa smiled awkwardly and picked up a breadstick, holding it up to her girlfriend's face. "Come on Anna, this is a time for celebration. Your brother's team just won."
She wanted to kick herself for ignoring the elephant in the room.
Nevertheless, Anna's lips lifted into a smile and she bit the end off, munching slowly. Relieved, Elsa turned back to her pizza. She hadn't thought the trick would've worked. She felt at a loss on how to comfort Anna. It wasn't everyday someone ran into their ex.
So she said nothing.
Instead, Elsa shifted in her chair until her arm brushed against Anna's. She pushed down her nerves and reached under the table again. Her fingers searched and fumbled until her hand met Anna's, clutching the fabric of her jeans tightly. Without a word, Elsa gently unhooked the tensed digits and threaded their fingers together.
Anna glanced at her with gratitude and tenderness in her eyes. Despite her earlier nervousness, Elsa found herself smiling back.
"So, Anna," Pete piped up, a grin stretching across his stocky features, "I see you managed to snag someone while we were away."
Heat rushed to Elsa's cheeks. Everyone's gazes landed on them and Elsa straightened in her seat. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Anna's face blank. Elsa's eyes roamed to the ceiling and she wondered why today was Relationship Day. Anna's fingers tensed in her grip and anxiety spiked in Elsa's stomach. She rubbed a small circle into Anna's hand, hoping to soothe her and Anna's shoulders slowly relaxed. Anna threw her a half-smile. Elsa smiled back.
Sweet relief.
"Yeah," Anna said, ducking her head, "I did. It's been about a month now." She turned to Elsa and Elsa felt giddy at the warmth in Anna's expression. "It's been wonderful."
"Cheers!" Pete raised his cup and the rest of table hollered in agreement.
Then, they all descended into conversation again. A few of the hockey players indulged Adam's questions, talking about past games, strategies, unusual injuries, and upcoming events. Elsa hid her smile. Belle's boyfriend was usually quiet so the display of awkward excitement was endearing. Belle herself was even indulging Anna's slight interest in France. The brunette was more than happy to tell her about her childhood in the country and Anna listened with rapt attention, commenting here and there about her club member moving there after her graduation.
Elsa listened and waited. The hand in hers eventually relaxed and the underlying nervousness trickling in her veins slowly receded as the night went on. But she couldn't help noticing one thing.
Kristoff wouldn't stop staring at them.
He watched the two of them over his drink, stuck between Adam and another large hockey player. Elsa quirked an eyebrow at him and he ducked his head. She bit her lip and clutched the her dress under the table. Although she could understand his behavior, Elsa hoped the rest of Anna's family wasn't as protective. She knew how to make good impressions. She knew how to be courteous. She didn't know how to deal with an overprotective brother or an array of siblings who might have a less than appealing impression of her based on said older brother's opinion.
Come on Elsa, stop it. You're getting ahead of yourself. It's unlikely Kristoff is going to spout unprecedented things about to his family just because of a first impression. When you meet the rest of Anna's family, then you can start worrying about what they think of you.
She blushed when she realized the path her mind was going down. She ran a hand through her hair and tried to calm the sudden spike in her pulse.
She was really getting ahead of herself.
"Are you okay Elsa?"
Elsa twitched and turned to face Anna, a strained smile curling on her lips. Anna frowned, worry darkening her eyes.
"I'm fine." She racked her brain for a change of topic. "What were you and Kristoff speaking about?"
Anna's frown deepened and irritation flashed in her eyes. Anxiety gripped Elsa's stomach and she hurried to apologize, but the redhead shifted in her seat and grumbled quietly, "He's frustrated about the job offer Mike got. We got into a bit of an argument over it."
Elsa guessed she meant more than a bit. Anna shifted closer to her and dropped her voice as low as it could go while Elsa could still hear.
"I told him that's not a job offer Mike can ignore. And Kristoff was frustrated because he knows it's a good deal, but he really hates the idea of him working with anyone associated with Westerguard." Anna pursed her lips and worked her jaw back and forth. "He knows it's stupid and it is."
Elsa frowned thoughtfully and leaned closer. "You told him your friend should take it, didn't you?" Anna's expression darkened, but she nodded.
"Max has a good eye for talent," she mumbled. "It's a great chance for his career."
Elsa squeezed her hand and searched her face, eyes flicking over the tension lining Anna's brow and neck. "There's something else bothering you, isn't there?" she whispered.
Anna shook her head, a small smile gracing her lips. "It's nothing, don't worry about it. I'm just—" she gestured weakly with her hand, "—tired from today is all."
Elsa tucked her bottom lip between her teeth and glanced around the table. Everyone else was either engaged in conversation or scarfing down pizza slice after pizza slice. Her eyes passed over Anna's plate. It remained untouched for the most part. Elsa dug the nails of her free hand into her thigh. She glanced up and saw Belle giving her a worried look. Elsa's eyes flicked to Anna and the brunette cocked her head to the window.
Elsa inhaled sharply and turned to Anna. The redhead fiddled with her drink and although she was still smiling, Elsa noticed it still didn't reach her eyes. She glanced back at Belle and her friend gestured to the side again. Elsa swallowed thickly.
Okay Elsa, be brave.
She tugged on Anna's hand, heart rate picking up when Anna finally met her gaze. Elsa faltered at the immediate worry that appeared in Anna's eyes.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
Elsa bit her lip. "Can we talk outside?"
Anna stiffened before nodding quickly. "Sure."
The lack of wind and rain was the first thing Elsa noticed as the two of them stepped out of the parlor. The second—and more important thing—was the way Anna's shoulders immediately loosened as they exited. The music from inside dimmed when she shut the door. Elsa's breath came out in a wisp of white and she watched, with a twinge in her gut, as Anna's face fell. Her girlfriend stood there with a hand on the doorknob, brow furrowed in contemplation.
Elsa squirmed. A wind rustled past them and she wrapped her arms around herself. She didn't feel cold though, just out of her element. Was she supposed to broach the topic of Anna's ex with her? Did Anna even want to talk about it? Elsa chewed on her lip. She'd chosen to lay out the subject of her anxiety, but similarly, Anna had kept her situation under lock and key.
But she wanted Anna to know she could come to her.
She inhaled and tried to steady her nerves.
"At least the rain's stopped?"
Anna jumped and Elsa wondered what thoughts had been circling in her mind during the moment. She glanced up at the sky and frowned. "Yeah, that's something." A smile ghosted on her lips. "Especially since you hate the—" Anna coughed and rubbed the back of her neck, "—well, no more sucky, drippy weather. For now."
Elsa's shoulders hunched to her ears and she shifted her weight. The somber reminder wiped the hopefulness from her face. "Yeah…"
Anna grimaced. "Sorry, I don't mean to be such a party pooper." Her shoulders drooped and she shrugged. "I know I haven't been exactly...cheerful. I just need some—"
"Space?" Elsa asked. Anna paused, a pleading look in her eyes, but she smiled faintly. Elsa looked down and fingered a button on her peacoat, mumbling, "You said you don't want to talk about it, so I won't push you."
Elsa heard the rush of footsteps on cement before arms were thrown around her neck. She gasped and her hands instinctively pressed against a shivering backside. Anna hiccuped in her ear, burying her nose into Elsa's shoulder.
"You—" Anna's voice cracked, "—are more wonderful than you think you are."
Elsa's eyes burned and she hugged Anna tighter to her, turning her head to press a firm kiss against Anna's temple. Anna gripped her neck tighter and sniffed. Elsa rubbed her back with circles, taking in the crisp scent of rainwater and hint of green-apple shampoo from her hair. They stayed like that for several moments, the cold night air curling around them like a gentle hand.
With a sigh, Elsa lifted her face from Anna's hair and peered around. They were still standing in front of the pizza parlor and although the street was deserted, she couldn't help feeling uneasy.
"My truck's at the corner." Anna didn't look up from her shoulder. "If you're getting nervous again, we can go there."
Elsa chuckled weakly. "Am I that obvious?"
Anna finally pulled back, staring up at her with a small, amused smile. Even with the way her brow was still creased, there was a familiar sparkle in her eyes. "No, I'm just starting to notice little things more clearly now."
Elsa's bottom lip quivered and she couldn't stop herself from delivering a swift peck to Anna's mouth. Wordlessly, she grabbed Anna's hand and tugged her down the sidewalk. A fog had started to settle over the city and Elsa felt the usual somberness that came with gloomy skies and heavy clouds weigh down on her shoulders. A sideways glance confirmed that Anna was still feeling down with the way she dragged her feet. Elsa was relieved when the worn, red truck came into view and Anna fished out her keys to pull the back door open.
They clambered in and when the door shut, Elsa noticed the tension drain from Anna. The blonde reached down and unlaced her boots, tucking them under the seat of Anna's truck when she was done.
Anna blinked at her. "What are you doing?"
Elsa squirmed and crossed her legs underneath her. "I was hoping we could," she coughed and fingered her braid, a blush rising to her cheeks, "spend a while in here." A sigh escaped her lips and she slumped forward. "I'm not really up for any more partying, sorry."
Anna groaned in relief and sank against the cushion of her seat, "Thank god." She gave an expression somewhere between a smile and a grimace. "I kind of—actually, nevermind."
Elsa wrung her hands in her lap. Her eyes took in Anna's creased brow and the curve of her mouth. An ache made her chest feel stifled. She hesitated for a moment before leaning against Anna's shoulder. She felt Anna tense, then her girlfriend relaxed.
"You know," Elsa began softly, eyes trained on the leather of the front seat, "when I was first diagnosed—"
Anna glanced at her, eyes flashing with worry. "Elsa, wait—"
Without looking, Elsa placed a finger on her lips. "Shh, it's okay. I have a point here, just trust me."
She felt Anna shift beside her, but otherwise her girlfriend remained silent. Elsa tucked a loose strand behind her ear, biting her lip. For a moment, she mulled over Anna's distant behavior earlier before trudging on.
"There's two people in this relationship."
Anna blinked. "Uh, okay. I got that part Elsa."
Despite the nerves beginning to buzz under her skin, Elsa still chuckled.
"As I was saying, when I was first diagnosed, my parents were shocked." She grimaced, recalling the way her mother's face had paled. "Things were awkward afterwards."
"How long?" Anna asked. Her words were gentle. Elsa pressed closer into her.
"For longer than a bit," she laughed dryly. "To them, it was new. I didn't have the heart to tell them about the times I was so anxious I couldn't leave my room."
"Elsa—" Anna cupped her face. Elsa cursed herself when she felt her eyes start to water again. A firm kiss to her mouth kept them at bay for a little while longer.
Elsa drew back and inhaled slowly. "I didn't tell them for a while. Not until my first therapist sat us all down. He told me no one's a mind reader. My parents wouldn't completely understand what was going through my head unless I let them know." She smiled bitterly at her lap, at the silver watch on her wrist and the hem of her expensive pea coat. "Thinking back on it," she blinked and felt a tear slide down her cheek, "I wish I had told them so many things sooner."
Anna brushed the tear away. Elsa looked up and her smile softened. "I understand if you don't want to talk about what happened earlier so soon, but—" realization began to dawn on Anna, the worry in her eyes slowly giving way to apprehension, "—you know how I said I just wanted you to hold my hand when my anxiety got bad?"
Anna swallowed and nodded, eyes trained on Elsa as if she were the only thing in the world right now.
Elsa cleared her throat, then looked down, grip excruciating on Anna's hand. "I just wanted you to know that...that there's two people in this relationship Anna." She raised her head, eyes wet. Anna stared down at her, eyes darting back and forth across her face. Elsa held her gaze, her own eyes unmoving, and said, "I care about you Anna. A lot."
Anna's lips parted and the breathless "Oh," that left her had Elsa buzzing. The blonde swallowed and looked down at their hands. Their knuckles were strained white, fingers interlaced.
"We're together in this," she whispered.
Unable to refrain any longer, Elsa let go of their hands and wiped her eyes. Anna pulled away and shifted in her seat, turning to stare at the dashboard. She stared at it with such an intensity Elsa couldn't discern her expression. She sniffed and reached for Anna's hand. Anna upturned her palm and interlaced their fingers. Elsa pushed down the lump in her throat. She pressed her face into Anna's shoulder.
"I'm here for you too..."
Slowly, arms wrapped around her and pulled her close. A kiss pressed against the top of her head.
"Oh Elsa, I know that." Anna ducked her head and kissed her cheek. Elsa slipped her arms around Anna's neck and buried her face in her girlfriend's shoulder as Anna said, "I'm not perfect, but even a dolt like me gets what you're saying." She pressed quick, butterfly kisses to Elsa's face, over her cheeks again, her forehead, nose, chin, everywhere she could reach.
Elsa laughed and wrapped her arms around Anna's waist. Anna caught her lips and they shared a soft kiss. Then Anna moved away, her lips nearing Elsa's ear.
"I care about you a lot too," Anna whispered, breath ghosting over the shell of her ear.
A shudder traveled down Elsa's spine. She frowned and pulled back, the smallest downward curve tugging at her mouth. Elsa cupped her cheek. "But?" she asked softly.
Anna tucked her lip between her teeth, eyes darting to the side. "But I don't know if I'm ready to talk about what happened." Her eyes darkened and Elsa felt her grip tighten on their hands. "I'm beat. Exhausted. Today's been long, especially for you, and right now I kind of don't really want to talk about school, or exes, or anything like that. I just want to cuddle with my girlfriend and sleep."
Elsa pulled Anna into a hard kiss. "You don't have to tell me anything," she whispered fiercely when they parted. Her blue eyes flared when she saw guilt flash across Anna's face. She cupped her face and touched their foreheads together. "I just need to know if you're going to be okay."
This close, Elsa felt—more than saw—Anna's grin.
"Thanks," she whispered, and Elsa indulged herself in stroking the pads of her thumbs over her girlfriend's cheekbones. She stared into those blue-green eyes, feeling a strange wave of remorse that she hadn't seen Anna's eyes in several days.
She smiled, eyes half-lidded. "I missed you."
Anna raised a hand and placed it over one of Elsa's, returning her smile. "I missed you too." Then her eyes widened slightly and she straightened, gasping softly, "Oh, hey, I've got something for you..."
Elsa blinked. Anna wiggled and twisted until she could reach under the seat. Elsa had a second to recall Anna had left her backpack in her truck after they arrived at the parlor before it came into view.
Anna huffed and unzipped it, rummaging through its contents. "I planned to give it to you earlier, but, well, you know. Stuff came up. And I didn't want anything to happen to it and I know it's late and we can't exactly make up for it, but—" she withdrew a carefully wrapped package and placed it in Elsa's hands. "Happy Anniversary Elsa."
"Oh." Elsa straightened, wide awake now. "Anna, you didn't have to."
Anna snorted and kissed her cheek. "I wanted to though." She settled back down again and wrapped her arms around Elsa. "Go on, open it."
A shy smile spread across Elsa's face and she delicately tore off the paper. Inside were two gifts: a thin, black case and a small photo. She gasped, holding up the frame to study it in the low light. "Oh Anna! Where did you find this?"
Anna pulled her closer and nuzzled her cheek. "I got it at a small shop somewhere downtown." The bashfulness in her voice did nothing to hide the pride at Elsa's reaction. "Eugene and a few friends of mine took me around the city the day before our anniversary and helped me pick out a gift for you. But I didn't want to stop there so I got something extra before the game."
Elsa turned to her, frowning. "Is that why you were late?"
Anna blushed. "Guilty."
Elsa lowered her gaze, but failed to hide her smile. She mumbled something under her breath.
"I'm sorry, what? I didn't catch that Elsa."
Elsa's shoulders bunched up to her ears. "I know I shouldn't be...surprised." Her lips switched to a half-grimace. "But I am. I mean, we've only been dating for about a month and I dumped this big thing on you and so much has happened, yet you're still—"
"Hey, hey, hey!' Anna pressed a finger to Elsa's lips, cutting her off. "Okay first of all, rambling is my thing and second, it's not a big thing."
Elsa's grimace twisted further and Anna frowned. "Bad way to phrase that, I'm sorry, but you having an anxiety disorder doesn't mean our relationship is going to end or something."
Elsa found it hard to breathe.
"It's just so strange to have someone," she blinked and looked away quickly, "so readily accepting of me." Elsa rubbed her eyes tiredly. "It's never been like that before," she said, sniffling.
Anna stroked her hair, murmuring, "But this isn't like that. This is different." Her voice cracked a little. "And I know I can't tell you about Hans yet, but I can promise you that I'll be here for you."
Elsa searched her face. "This is different?" she asked, soft and whisper-shy.
Anna grinned and pressed their foreheads, eyes twinkling when the blush returned to Elsa's features. "Yeah, good different. Like I told those guys, wonderful different. Elsa, you're like—" she laughed and Elsa heard the truth in her voice, "—wow."
Elsa's expression softened and she looked down shyly, fiddling with the collar of Anna's jacket.
"Uh, Elsa?"
"Hm?"
"You still have Present #2 to open."
"Oh!"
Elsa started and glanced over the edge of their seat. It lay forgotten with the rest of the wrapping paper. She blinked and reached for the box, eyes flicking from it to Anna, quirking an eyebrow. The younger woman tapped her knuckles together, looking more excited than she had all day. Elsa chuckled and snuggled into Anna as she opened the box. Metal clinked together and flickered in the darkness. Elsa's eyes widened.
"Because of your necklace, I thought of you when I saw it."
A simple chain dangled in Elsa's fingers. It was closely reminiscent to Anna's own, except the heart was substituted by a six-pointed snowflake. Elsa gasped softly and brought it closer to her face, eyes roaming over the small crystal-blue gem, dead center in the geometric shape.
"Oh Anna," Elsa breathed, "you didn't have to..."
Anna giggled and pecked her cheek. "You say that a lot."
Elsa blushed and clutched the necklace to her chest. "Well it's true this time."
Anna stroked Elsa's cheek with the back of her index finger, her gaze tender and warm. "Think of this as a make-up gift. For how our anniversary turned out."
"We didn't really fight," Elsa pointed out. She was captivated by the glow in her girlfriend's eyes.
Anna snorted. "Okay, a thank you gift then." She leaned in for a quick kiss and Elsa met her halfway. "For talking to me again."
Elsa melted. Her eyes shone with a fresh wave of tears and she angled her head to brush their lips together, craving a deeper kiss. "I missed talking with you. Hearing your voice up close and personal. Just being with you. I missed it. I missed you."
Anna shivered and pulled back. "Do me a favor then?"
Elsa's brow furrowed. "What?"
Hands ran up her back, light at first, then clutching the back of her coat. A sigh brushed her ear and Anna buried her face into the crook of Elsa's neck. "Dry those tears and give me a few more kisses?"
Elsa shivered. From the cold, worry, or Anna's voice, she wasn't sure. She turned her head and met the lips waiting her.
"I can do that," Elsa said, soft and low.
Anna let out a noise, low and husky and tinged with heat. She pressed into the kiss and Elsa felt her urgency beneath soft skin. A shiver traveled down Elsa's spine and alighted a tingling in her belly. Anna tilted her head and caught Elsa's bottom lip between hers. Elsa heard a breathy utterance of her name, small and needy, coupled with a brush of the tip of a tongue. She moaned, then shuddered as her neck flushed. Her toes curled. Elsa sighed through her nose and slipped her hands down to cradle Anna's neck. Her fingers played with the soft strands at Anna's nape.
"Anna."
Anna moaned before shivering and detaching. Elsa's eyes fluttered open and that's when she realized she'd closed them without realizing. "What's wrong?" she asked, dazed.
Anna shifted back and fiddled with Elsa's hands. "Cold," she mumbled. Elsa barely had a moment to get a word in edgewise before her gloves were being prodded off her fingers. She blinked, a tremble running through her as Anna gently slid her glove off the last finger.
"I need to feel these now more than ever," Anna said, lifting Elsa's hands and kissing her fingertips.
Elsa laughed, giddy and light. She wiggled closer and pressed butterfly kisses against Anna's mouth, her smile widening when Anna giggled.
"If it means hearing that," Elsa tilted her head and glided plush, red lips along along freckled cheeks and a smooth jawline, "then I'll do anything."
Anna's shoulders shook as she giggled. She turned her head and captured Elsa for one more long, sweet kiss. Elsa buried one hand in Anna's bright red hair and held her cheek with her other. She let herself fall into the warm, shivery embrace of pliant lips and slender arms. Gravity slowly pushed her down as Anna slid back on the seat and Elsa found herself resting on top. She pulled back with a moan and Anna's face lit up. The dark interior of the truck almost obscured her darkened eyes, but it failed to hide the beaming smile.
Elsa's eyes softened and a glow spread from the crown of her head all the way down to her toes. "You look beautiful," she whispered.
Anna's smile dropped and she blinked several times. "Me?" Elsa nodded and grinned when she felt Anna blush beneath her fingertips. "T-thank you," she said.
The blonde giggled and snuggled into the crook of Anna's neck. Her eyes fluttered shut and she hummed contentedly when Anna wrapped her arms around her waist. She traced circles on Anna's chest and time passed with the beat of her heart.
Dimly, Elsa swore she heard a faint pitter-patter on the truck's roof.
"Anna?"
Anna turned her head, crinkling her nose. "Hm?"
Her eyes were still closed and Elsa wondered how far into a sleepy trance she was. She smiled tenderly and nuzzled her nose deeper into Anna's shoulder and sighed. "Thank you."
"For what?" Anna asked, voice sluggish and soft.
"For the picture and the necklace," Elsa murmured. Her fingers drifted down and she laid her hand atop Anna's shirt, at the spot where her heart was. Her eyes watered and she bit her lip, tightening her grasp on Anna. "And for...for holding me."
Anna shifted. Elsa looked up as lips grazed her forehead.
"You liked the picture?"
"Yes?"
"Even though it wasn't some really famous architectural achievement like the Empire State Building?"
Elsa laughed and even though it sounded garbled and strange because there were tears pricking at the corner of her eyes, she felt...content? Happy? Free.
Anna's cheeks bunched up and the sleepy grin on her face made Elsa's heart flutter. "And you liked the necklace?"
Elsa cradled it gently by her chest. A blush coated her cheeks and she leaned up to place a chaste peck on Anna's lips.
"Love it," she whispered.
Anna bit her lip and Elsa was certain the redhead would have tucked her hair behind her ear if her hands weren't preoccupied. Then she frowned and her expression darkened.
"Did you—" Elsa frowned at the insecurity that flashed in blue-green eyes, "—enjoy today?" She heard Anna's breath hitch and her frown deepened. "Even with all the stuff that happened...you were happy right?"
Elsa's face softened. She shifted onto her elbows so she could place her hand against Anna's cheek. "I was happy just holding your hand," she whispered. Her throat tightened and she sniffed. "I was happy you were still there even after I told you about everything."
Anna's hand immediately reached up to cup her cheek, a thumb brushing away the tear at her eye before it could escape. Elsa blinked away the wetness blurring her vision to see a tentative smile on her girlfriend's face.
"I'm not going anywhere," Anna said. Her eyes crinkled at the corners. "And it's going to take a lot more than our anniversary fallout for you to get rid of me. Sorry but you're stuck with me."
Elsa giggled and leaned down to nuzzle her nose against Anna's. Anna tugged her down and the blonde settled back against her shoulder, sighing in content. So close to Anna and in the sanctity of her old pick-up truck, Elsa felt the day's events finally wearing down on her. Her eyes fluttered shut and a slow, steady pulse thudded in her ears. Warmth surrounded her and a sweet heaviness draped itself over her.
"Elsa?"
Anna's voice, hesitant and shy, slipped through the fog in Elsa's mind.
"Hm?"
A finger traced the curve of her cheek, lingering slightly before a hand played with the end of her braid.
"How do you feel about spending winter vacation with me?"