B.O.W. Payback & Cavern of Hell
Our survivor in blue clothing was done with the Residence and stepped outside once more. Every time Jill ventured outdoor her radio would beep and send the annoying voice of Brad saying the same damn thing 'This is Bread!', as if we didn't know his name already. That alone sufficed to make her not rejoice so much at the prospect of getting outside; she knew she would be assaulted yet again by his redundant message. As she was making her way through the passage with poisonous snakes falling from above, Vickers made his presence known yet again.
«This is Bread! Come in! ».
She sighed heavily and grabbed her radio, «This is Jill. Do you hear me, Bread? Over. »
«It's Bread! If yo—give me a s- peanut butter here-»
«Bread? This is Jill. Over. »
«I'm Bread. I've been- can you- me? I repe-been worried sick, -more sick than worried though-. Can anyon- stiff buttocks-? »
«This is still Jill. Bread? Bread! »
They kept repeating their names for two hours. Even Barry ran past her during that time period, looking at her as if she was highly deranged but the woman didn't even notice. Until Jill became angry, finally, and leveled her voice, «DAMN IT BREAD you can't even say your name right! I'm the one formulating all names wrong so don't copy my style! And stop disregarding communication protocols! Over. »
«…..This is Bre—»
She promptly cut him off before throwing the radio on the floor; it split in half puking its circuit out. «Shit, it's definitely broken now. »
The S.T.A.R.S.'s self-proclaimed Annihilator got back into the shed and found another note on the wall signed by Barry. ''Use this thing to protect us from that bullet-proof freak in chains. I went ahead and ran.'' Valentine looked around except she found nothing but a shovel. She frowned, «…Is this what Burry want me to use?... See what I did there? », unfortunately for her the walls aren't endowed with brains cells so they didn't smirk.
When Valentine entered the mansion again she realized, and rather painfully as her left arm got chopped off, that the whole place had been invaded by the fast Hunters. She blew her attacker's brains out by shoving the shotgun inside its mouth as it shrieked, then as it clawed the floor dying she brusquely jammed an Aid Spray nozzle right up her bleeding stump. «Right, after clearing this funfair of putrid humans I now have to rid it of a super-reptilian army, plus they perforate my ear drums with their war cry. »
Could have been worse, like having to rescue a certain medic on the second floor as she was being useless yet again; or yet hearing her repeat ''Billy HELP!'' over as she just wouldn't fall from that damn hole, even after twenty minutes of waiting for her to just let go already.
I know; heartless.
For Billy.
But that'll teach him to have ridiculous upper-lip facial hair despite having a somewhat cool tattoo.
Further inside, our non-permanent amputee stumbled upon the corpse of Rebecca; Jill recognized the uniform as it was impossible to identify the Bravo by her face since her entire upper body had exploded. That and she was the only other woman on their team so it was literally an evident deduction. Still, the way she had been obliterated, only one weapon could have done such a remarkable job and only one man was equipped with it in the manor. Well if Barry had to unload his frustration into someone, better Chambers than her.
Valentine looked around the young recruit's pockets for ammo but didn't find any. She had not known the girl for long but didn't expect her to be that cheap. «Kids, so ungrateful these days. »
The woman went down a long corridor that was filled with suits of armors holding shields with deadly spikes on them. In the middle of the way was a small pedestal with a key fixed in it, the veins-throbbing woman shot the damn thing then kept walking. After forcing the door at the end of the passage, she got reunited with an old friend again, no not Barry; I wrote a friend.
She was walking beside tons of books when a window crashed behind her, quickly aiming back she saw that familiar green face with the tiny yellow eyes. Its black tongue lashed out with all of its attention focused on the human, it was similar for her as she lit a bottle before throwing the object its way. Yawn hissed, surely it felt the heat; the books definitely were doomed though, well so much for art and knowledge.
The snake executed a vicious thrust her way, biting her plus pushing her off the ledge, she managed not to break her neck on the first floor… too bad for her left wrist though. And to think it had just grown back, too. The reptile slid down the length of the wall with ease, hissing with elation, making its way around the other set of shelves in the library. Jill applied spray in her face and- «Shit that burns!I», palms covering her eyes, she was now enemy made no sound while moving but its hissing would have to do, cursing again she readied the shotgun, listening attentively.
Now that was sport, she licked her lips and quickly aimed at her right when she sensed it being there; the only sound she got was the cartridge exploding a portion of the floor. She analyzed, I must have aimed a little too high and it flew over its body, she felt her rival revolving around her now like it did in the attic. Instinctively, she rolled on the side colliding into its body, her assailant made a sound as she stuck the barrel straight on it and fired, then it spat with anger. Valentine knew the chance of it attacking instantaneously after she did was high thus she already was out of the way when Yawn lunged right where she had been.
She quickly calculated, means its head is now right there, so she fired again, opening her eyes, saw blurred forms and started unloading the weapon into the bigger stain of the two. One of its eye got blown, the snake attacked back with renewed vehemence but its sight was less precise now so only her arm got stuck inside its mouth up to her shoulder. She fell on her knees but kept firing, the barrel of the shotgun was deep inside so the blow ripped through the soft fragile tissue. It screamed, she got released and groaned between clenched teeth as fangs cut through her skin while the reptile quickly pulled away. The snake hurled its head backward, spit spilled forth, now its massive body hitting the nearby shelf before falling inanimate on the floor with a loud noise. Jill got up while blinking rapidly, put the barrel on its head and pulled the trigger again; she would not wait for it to flinch back to life.
Biggest trophy so far.
Her arm was bleeding but she slapped a plant on it before moving closer to the Yawn's body, putting her ear against the skin, «Richard? You still alive in there? » It was stupid but she just had to try, no way would he have survived the gastric juice of this monster, more so because it was a giant snake with even stronger toxic bodily fluids. But if he did survive think about the stories that would make! Her breathing was slowing down; she waited a couple more seconds and then said, «Well, at least you're not hurting anymore, huh Richard. »…. had asked 'does it never not hurt?', well be careful what you wish for.
Well now visiting the last areas in the mansion, Valentine almost got splattered between two walls as they closed in on her, another one of OsNotWell Spacer's idea of a good time. She ventured into humid passage occupied by more spiders and decomposing buddies. As hours went by the zombies became more and more damaged, dark black fluid came out of them as they were literally falling apart. None of that helped to improve the overall stench, you can never get used to that.
Eventually our reptilian-annihilator went back to fetch Forest, it was time to leave this place in hopes to find an exit that would really be a way out this time. When she entered the room the man tried to hug her, «Hey, didn't think you'd miss me that much. We got t-», he kept trying to embrace her, «Listen you can always thank me later once we're out of here. How about we eat cake toget-» what was left of his upper jaw touched her neck and that's when she really pushed him, «Down Forest!», his weak leg didn't support the Bravo so he fell backward hitting his head on the bed frame. Jill heard something crack, afterwards he managed to turn on his front, «I didn't mean to give you brain damage but what is wrong with you? I warn you if you keep this up I'll get physical. »
Yet he anxiously moaned as he was now trying to get up despite his two limbs missing, «I can't understand you when you talk like that. » Speyer's sole response was to complain again, his empty sockets staring at her. Poor zombie missing his lower jaw couldn't even accomplish the only thing he really wanted to; now that's pure unfairness. Forest finally just dragged his decomposed self to her legs, its one valid hand trying to get a grip on the floor, all his nails being torn off, pushing himself with his remaining leg. «Okay, I guess you are listening to me about the 'down' part…. »
At least he was faster than a tortoise, and soon his head was close to her leg but Jill didn't let him do anything else. She kicked his skull subsequently breaking his neck, gurgling sounds were heard and dark liquid spilled out. Speyer still tried to get a taste of her boots even though his head was twisted at an inhumane angle. She rammed her heel down; breaking the spinal column completely this time so he stopped moving.
Before leaving, the Alpha picked up the bed sheet and covered his body, «Go back to sleep.», no more Faux-Rest for Forest.
Well Burton will definitely never get those twenty cents back now. Life is so cruel.
++++++++++++++R.E.++++++++++++++++
Wesker had been pursuing Enrico into the humid tunnels; it was really like hunting down an animal except that it was equipped with a handgun and wearing a mustache. Albert had the advantage though, and not only because he wore sunglasses, but for the fact that he knew these tunnels and Marini did not. Don't ask how it is that he does. Goddamn it I said don't!
It didn't take long for the Captain of Bravo team to seal his doom by running into a dead end. He turned around, listening to the calm footsteps of his pursuer echoing everywhere, until the Alpha appeared around the corner. His white face wasn't as emotionless as it usually was and the scenario felt even more eerie in this place.
Enrico leveled his weapon, «You wanna play you fucking pathetic piece of shit!? Take this! », a resonating 'clic' was heard then his finger twitched, producing yet another 'clic'.
His nemesis had been standing near the exit, staring, but when the second empty noise was heard a grin formed at the corner of his mouth. «You always were such an unlucky man...», he started advancing, clearly delighted by the turn of events and having the other man at his complete mercy. «Or is it due to your sole stupidity? You do know you have to reload from time to time? »
Marini's face turned red with anger, «Fucking sociopath…yeah you can say you're lucky I ran out of ammo but now you can taste my fists, and I'm glad I can finally break your damn shades along with that stupid face of yours! » The man stepped forward to meet the blond and flung his fist rapidly. Although experienced in Close Quarter Combat techniques, Albert was younger than the Bravo subsequently healthier than a somewhat overweight and older man who was in the bad habit of smoking. Plus Wesker's sunglasses gave him super powers, so Enrico was clearly at a disadvantage.
Albert dodged the couple of punches the other sent his way, letting the brown-haired man humor him for a while, then executed a spin kick sending Marini flying to the side right into the stone wall. The man groaned, Wesker's face had returned to its unreadable mask as he quickly closed in, blocked another incoming attack before grabbing the man's neck. He squeezed with unprecedented anger, his fingers digging into the skin and letting out a grunt as he leveled Enrico off the floor.
His head already feeling like it could explode, Marini sent his knuckles into the Alpha's stomach but all it did was anger Wesker more, which was hinted by the way his jawbones were visibly tensed under his skin. Albert's mouth was as firmly closed as his grip on the man's neck, fingers tried to pry the hand open again but Enrico was this close from passing out when the attacker unexpectedly let go.
Bravo's leader dropped to the floor, holding his neck and coughing violently, breathing air in by spasms. His persecutor towered him, voice filled with disgust, «You're the one who's pathetic, a sorry piece of shit such as you deserve to die like one.», he pulled his handgun out and aimed at the man's forehead, «Don't worry, I'll let your wife know how dead you are by sending her a picture.» Albert made the mistake to savor the moment again, allowing Burton to walk on them.
«…Captain? »
The one concerned half turned around, «…do you mind? Your chum's not feeling so well, I'm doing him a favor. As for you, leave. »
Barry stared and the Captain's voice became colder, «That's an order, Burton. »
«Yeah, okay, but I'm only doing this for my family. », and he left running.
Albert's face turned to Enrico again, who was now holding a grenade, smiling fiercely. However Wesker's visage remained as unresponsive which greatly annoyed Marini, «For fuck's sakes, what kind of robotic freak are you? I'm holding a fucking grenade plus I tied your boot laces to mine when you got busy chatting. That means you're as good as dead. »
The Alpha diverted his attention, «Look at you poor fool, you can't even handle one simple gun let alone a grenade; the pin is still in. » Enrico glanced at the object but it was quickly removed from his grasp and tossed aside before he got hit in the face. «Easy prey. », Wesker was about shooting when he got interrupted again, he heard someone hit the floor hard followed by painful curses.
He sighed, grabbed Marini's legs and savagely broke them so he wouldn't escape. Not having time to undo the knots he just somehow removed his boots then hid into a dark alcove. Seven seconds later, someone walked passed him so he listened.
See what I did there….? Stereotype dark corner mentioned earlier in the Residence by Jill and Wesker, plus seven as in a wink to RE 5's seven minutes?….yup. Just making sure you're paying attention else that might have been another humor-thing lost in the void like ones I didn't underline.
No cookies this time, I ran out…. stuffed my face, to be more precise.
++++++++++++++R.E.++++++++++++++++
Valentine got back outside where that nice waterfall was; she walked through it seeing that the only thing preventing her doing so was harmless water, and discovered another hidden passage. She was descending the ladder when her wet boot slipped followed by her grip on the bar. The contact with the ground below was not painless more so because she landed on a pointy rock, cursing she shut her eyes tight and pushed her face forward during the motion which granted her forehead to be rammed into the lower bar.
She shoved a leaf back there in her underwear and continued, two doors later she was making her way through a shadowy passage as a voice came to her, « Jill, is that you? Somehow I recognized your footsteps…. »
«Is that stupid's voice Martinis'? »
He rolled his eyes, «It's 'Marini'. »
The woman turned the corner and saw the team leader seated there, she wondered if he'd just been dozing off while freezing his ass on the cold rock, until she noticed his legs being at an awkward angle plus someone's boots were attached to his for some reason. She tried to get closer but he leveled his hand, «Stop! Are you with anybody, Jill? »
«….weird set up for asking me if I'm single... »
«wha—no, are you alone? »
«Yes, definitely; as far as I know everyone else is dead. »
«Well here's what might explain it; Umbrella set us up! »
«UmBurial? »
«No, Umbrella. »
«Yes, UmBurial. »
«…..damn it Valentine, S.T.A.R.S.'s got a mole….! Some infiltrator, secret agent, a spy, someone's a traitor-» A pair of light-blue socks with gray sharks on them appeared at the corner behind Jill as Marini kept talking, «… a blond piece of-», he suddenly got shot in the gut.
Valentine looked back, no one was in sight, «Well what do you know, evil tunnels and they're armed, too. Hmm, but what was that about a blond spy? The only fair haired man that is still alive is Wesker; and he is not dressed in red so it can't be him…» This was a deduction far too complicated for her so she just dismissed the information. Maybe Marini had too many martinis and was speaking nonsense. Nodding over her superior powers of inference, she abandoned the corpse there.
Jill then got introduced to Angry Boulders, just another pleasant way of being entertained around here. An additional tunnel had three in them so she had to dodge-roll, hold-breath-leap, knee-hurt and wrist-break her way around all that as they abnormally triggered one after another. As the last evil boulder demolished a stone wall, she removed tiny rocks from her bleeding palms and stood up, «…..well that was sport. I wonder though, when did I switch from a RE game to a Tomb Raider….? »
The cave had more surprises in store for her, next she had to fight the mother of all giant spiders. The hairy matriarch lifted both its front legs up enthusiastically, «I'll fEaSt oN yOur deLIcioUs FleSH! »
«We'll see who'll devour who! », she lit a Molotov and threw it, setting the oversized creature plus the smaller ones ablaze but also the rest of the room which was covered in webs. Valentine exited, waited for the agonizing gurgling to end, opened the door to let the smoke out and then went back in. The only door available was still barred by five strings of webs though, Jill hold her head in dismay, «Ah shit! Now how am I going to cross this door if it's covered in indestructible webbings? »
In a normal environment, anyone would have just tossed these aside with one arm and moved on. But this is Residential Evilness, THE survival horror world and SHE is Jill Not-Average Valentine; she had to use a combat knife and chop them to pieces like the dreadful obstacle they were. Done, she crossed the door and a Hunter popped out the corner again, one second later a knife flew into its forehead, killing it.
Jill moved around another corner only to collide into a wall, leveling her eyes she saw a sweaty double-chin, «Blurry! Thank Samael you're alive! »
«Um, yeah, you too. I think. », he pushed her aside.
«Are you alright? Your eyes are kind of moving horribly fast in their sockets. »
He hugged his cold silver partner, «Never been better, Jelly, never in my whole entire shitty existence, being a father of two annoying kids and my damn wife that just doesn't approve of me sleeping with my firearms-, never mind. I heard strange noises and came down here, but I only found Albe—I mean, I'll bet I found an elevator back there. Didn't expect to discover a place like this, and I certainly didn't imagine finding you here knowing you've been dragging Forest around.», then he acted even more bizarre, «Let's go together since it's dark and we can't see very well.»
She moved away while eyeing him apprehensively, surely this was Director's Crap coming back to haunt her for throwing the CD away, «….are you sure you're alright? You didn't smoke any of the blue plants that are growing around here, did you…? »
«Never mind if I'm losing it let's just investigate that lift, at least there's no unspecified red liquid near it. », he turned around and she followed him. The elevator was larger than the ones outside, meant to move bigger piece of equipment so that implies she could board it with Barry no problem. He approached the handrail and looked down, «Any ideas what we might find at the bottom? Aside from a possibly awful unbearable death? »
She eyed him as he was standing too close to the edge, «…there's just one way to find out…..», fighting the urge to push him overboard, she finally pressed the button since the delusional man was busy striking his handgun tenderly. The platform moved downward and they found themselves surrounded by the same uninteresting tunnels. Noises came to them, like someone who was trying to vomit and shit at the same time.
Burton, with his eternal Magnum ready, eyed the surroundings, «…what the hell was that sound….? Could be, a person? »
«Are you implying at the possibility of these rocks producing such a noise? Anyway it sounded like when my father being sick after our Halloween parties. »
«Halloween? Why not Christmas? »
She looked at him as if he was mad, «Because X-MasShit sucks. »
He needed to get rid of her and fast, knowing that their deranged leader was around here somewhere was more than he could bear so he turned to her, «You go check it out, I'll stay here and secure my escape route in order to leave you here. You know, just in case something happens… And if you're unlucky enough to run into the Captain, tell him I left the tunnels a long time ago. »
«Got it. BurpOn, you're always looking after the team, your family would be proud. »
He spaced out, «Only if they were still alive…»
«Why would they be dead? »
He mumbled, «…accidents happen…»
Then he snapped into that strange repetitive state again so she started leaving, when he suddenly activated the lift. Jill turned around and watched him ascend as he stared at her; both wearing a vacant expression. The sound of the motor echoed then the machine stopped, she heard him fall and a shot was fired accidentally, he groaned, got up and left, then silence. The lonely figure glanced around at the black and gray surfaces, a terrible theory dawning in her mind, that maybe, of all people, somehow, that perhaps Barry possibly wanted her dead.
But still merely a hypothesis.
Proceeding onward, Jill had to find her way within many small tunnels, that's when she got reunited with that woman in chains and no matter where Valentine went, the creature would magically appear across her path. Several times the Alpha nearly fell in the saliva the monster left everywhere, but she eventually found a door thus once more avoided being beheaded as Lisa swung her mad hands about, this time her arms got stuck on the flamethrower mechanism. The hooks descended, unlocking the door consequently allowing the prey to slip unharmed, and equally safe from more spitting.
The scenery then changed completely, the floor was filled with candles and the old furnishings lined with creepy dolls. Some of them were black as if they had been lit on fire, a few were headless or missing all four limbs, others were smiling. «Someone must have been using this dump as a hideout. », her thought trailed off when she noticed something peculiar occupying the center of the table. A bunch of chairs lay topped on one another like an unstable tower reaching to the ceiling. She just pulled wildly on the first one thus toppling it all over consequently making the objects assault her face. She kicked them away furiously, «Fuck I am definitely starting to despise art! », then shot some of them to pieces.
She then bathed her ass in cold filthy waters with snakes biting her butt cheeks until she ended in a small bedroom. Jill found a happy family photo which was even creepier; then looking down she stopped blinking, couldn't believe her eyes. There near a shitty desk stood an item that many people would kill to possess… «How in the FUCK is it possible!? PS4 isn't even out yet in stores! », she promptly grabbed the console and shoved it under her beret, speedily went up a ladder and soon realized it was connected to that old house in the woods.
She made her way under the trees again, avoiding the puke of a zombie; poor thing must be really lonely out there. With sympathy, Valentine threw him a piece of wood, «Catch! », but it perforated his rotting stomach, the man didn't bother and moaned as he tried to reach her still. «At least I tried to entertain you… minus the one thing that would actually entertain you. » The pitiable guy complained in approval, a decapitated hand and stump stretched towards his disappearing meal.
In any case he still had one hand to feed on.
++++++++++++++R.E.++++++++++++++++
Valentine re-entered the manor, wondering where to go now until she heard the screams again. That madwoman seemed to be emptying her lungs only because she could; or possibly she noticed her PS4 had been stolen. Perfectly understandable. Jill followed the sound that led her to a secret door right under the grand stairway. The double metal gates required some object so that they could be unlocked. The Alpha was fed up with these devices so her anger sufficed to destroy the obstacle; she blew the door open with a kick, exploding the gates from their hinges and watched them roll down the stairs below, making one hell of a ruckus.
She descended the 999 stairs, in a narrow passageway she ran across weak and moldy planks of wood, the only thing separating her from a dark bottomless pit and a very lonely painful death. Then she got down another ladder and found Barry who was apparently busy probing some skeleton. He heard something come his way but by the time the man turned around he got shoved against the coffin he was facing, then his head got repeatedly slammed on it.
He tried to explain himself during the treatment, each time his head was pulled upward that's when he had time to utter some words. «Thought I'd, go up, make sure, way was, clear…! »
She kicked him in the balls from behind and used that time to steal his precious friend Colt Python, which ought to make him feel docile and minuscule. «Believe me I don't enjoy kicking men in the jingle-hairy-sack but you fucking asked for it! »
That's when the invincible woman walked in, sent her hands flying into some statues completely obliterating the solid material; Jill figured that was her way of saying she'd do the same to them. Seems like she's strong enough to destroy concrete but not the decaying wooden shackles around her wrists; too bad, can't scratch her butt that way, who knows how long it's been itching.
Burton's strangled voice came from below, «Give weapon. Wanna, help. »
Valentine was still frowning as she aggressively rammed her heel on his hand, «Don't lie to me! You only want to help yourself get out of here in order to stuff your face with steaks!», then she aimed at the monster, «Maybe you can't die but such firepower will slow you down; at least giving me enough seconds to escape.» Jill pulled the trigger at the same time that Lisa was preparing to jump. She was in mid-air when the round hit her leg, the momentum of her movement disputing control over the powerful force of the blow; subsequently her upper body went forward as the lower portion was sent backward, abruptly making her land face-first.
Beret-badass quickly made her way around Trevor as Barry was getting on his feet, now receiving spit all over him. The monster was already getting up when the man called for help, «Jill! ».
She turned around, «You shouldn't have played me, Burton, it'll be your last mistake. », on that she watched him get mercilessly tossed over the edge. She was already leaving as his scream echoed throughout the stone room.
A family picture had flown out of his pocket and was now resting on the ground; on the back it read 'I had to do it.'