Yuko's ponytail bobbed as she shook her head at you. Her understanding eyes make your guilt cling tighter to your chest. You'd tried to apologize to her as you wait for class to start by the school foot lockers. You haven't seen Katsuki since it happened, and you're not sure you deserve to, considering.
"It's not your fault, Nishi," she promises. "Sure, I was surprised you reacted that way, but it's understandable. And nothing happened. You didn't bite him. You're both safe. We just have to be a little more careful when the two of you are around each other for a little while."
'It would have been better to have her condescension,' you think. You nearly DID bite Katsuki, and her gentle handling only makes you feel worse. Not that you don't think the little fatso, no, the little Omega won't forgive you. He's too soft, too nice and innocent for his own good. His smell traces through your brain, and you shutter at the memory.
"It's only natural that an Alpha would react like that," she adds to your shame.
It's only natural that you'd lose control with a presenting Omega? You had no choice? Does anything you did matter? Was it all just reduced down to basic instinct?
"I just want to say sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you," you add, trying to at lease have her recognize your sincerity.
She smiles a sad smile and nods instead of saying anything for a moment, seeming to finally get it.
"I was scared," she quietly admits, gazing down at her entwined hands. "I was scared you'd bite him or hurt me." She looks away from you, seeing the violent display behind her closed eyelids. "I could smell something was off, but then you pushed me to the floor and were on top of him before I could do anything. I tried to get you to stop, but" she takes a breath trying to sooth the delayed fear, "but then I was. You're a lot bigger than me, Nishi, and a lot stronger. I may be a Beta, but even though you were lost, you let me pull you away."
You snort in disagreement, and she giggles, relieving the tension between you two.
"OK, not all the way off, but you let me stop you. You did," she assures you. "You heard me cry out, and you whined and let me pull you far enough away from Yuuri to keep from biting him." She turns to meet your eyes, "and I'm grateful for that." She leans in and gives you a small kiss on your cheek before leaving you to reconsider your control.
Maybe it's time to take Jii-san up on his offer to teach you 'an Alpha's control,' whatever that means. It'd be worth it to see the light and care in her eyes look at you with approval again, even just once.
Now all you have to do is talk to Katsuki.