Sanji essentially becomes Zoro's personal shadow and one of the rest of Zoro's "friends" becomes his. No one trusts anyone. His so called friends don't trust Sanji around Zoro alone, Sanji doesn't trust them around Zoro alone and Zoro doesn't trust them around him.
Needless to say that breakfast the next morning has everyone sitting around the breakfast table watching each other, or more accurately everyone else is watching him and Zoro. Zoro is holding himself stiffly and trying not to pay attention to it, but even with his back to the group and spreading something on two plates worth of toast Sanji can see that he's tense.
"I can't believe Kuina made us clean all that stuff last night, my hands hurt." Luffy whines, flexing his fingers unhappily.
"Well it's called permanent marker for a reason." Franky explains.
Sanji watches with interest the way a strand of muscle in Zoro's arm stands out as he grips the blunt knife harder, his face is neutral but he is actually angry.
"It was your mess, you should have to clean it." Sanji says tartly.
"We had every right to-" Usopp starts to protests but is cut off by a loud metallic clang. Sanji's head whips around to see that Zoro has thrown the blunt butter knife into the sink with some speed and force and it's lodged itself in the drain cover and is now vibrating with a twangy hum.
Zoro turns around, two plates of toast in hand and sets them in front of Sanji and the empty place that Zoro will take.
"Try them both, pick whichever you like more. I don't mind either. Do you want coffee?" Zoro asks tensely.
"Ah… only if you were already going to make some. I don't want to put you out of your way." Sanji answers gently.
"I was. Black?" Zoro guesses and Sanji nods.
"I'll have a coffee as well Zoro if you're making it." Robin calls from her place at the table. Sanji watches Zoro take down just two mugs and suspects that he's not making coffee for just Sanji and Robin.
"Where's Kaya?" Zoro asks, not looking up from the mugs at all.
"At work, she's mad at me because I can't tell her who he is or why he's here. It also makes explaining why any of this is happening impossible." Usopp grumbles and glares at Sanji.
"My heart bleeds for you." Sanji snorts. The kettle clicks and Zoro pours the boiling water into two mugs and then sets them on the table. Zoro settles down in his seat around the corner from Sanji, his knees are brushing the demon's on one side and Brook's long boney knees are taking up most of the other side. At least on this end of the table Sanji is surrounded by people not trying to kill him.
Sanji picks up the coffee cup and drinks immediately. Zoro gasps in alarm and then relaxes. Sanji looks at him skeptically as he drinks half of the mug of boiling coffee. He sets it down and looks at Zoro.
"Did you just try to warn me that was hot? You know where I live, Zoro." Sanji teases.
"Shut up, I haven't had my coffee yet either." Zoro grumbles and bites into his toast, there's the slightest hint of a blush high on his cheeks.
"Luffy, what's the plan for today?" Nami asks brightly.
"I'm not going to school, I'm not leaving Sanji alone with any of you." Zoro interrupts, though he doesn't look up from his food.
"I figured that you might say that. But I've got all of our schedules here so if we set up a teleportation spell in Robin's office we should all be able to cover the house in our free periods." Nami says, unfolding a piece of paper and setting it on the table.
"I can also just bring my books here and work from here, if I need to go back to the library for anything I can. Other than that I can stay here whenever." Robin offers.
"Excellent." Nami nods.
Zoro is still not saying anything. He picks up his toast and takes a bite.
"What about the actual… plan?" Luffy says with some emphasis, shooting a look at Sanji.
"That's more Chopper's area of expertise." Nami answers.
"I have a lot in mind for Zoro, but I don't know about Sanji." Chopper says brightly.
"If you think I'm letting you touch me again you're out of your goddamn mind." Zoro says coldly and Chopper stares at Zoro with wide startled eyes.
"Well, before we get into that horrifying conversation I have a question." Sanji pipes up and the whole table looks at him.
"I'm not telling you anything!" Usopp declares loudly.
"Fabulous, a way to shut you up. No, my question was for Robin and Franky." Sanji explains and he can see the light bulb of understanding go off above Zoro's head.
"So were you deliberately trying to make me hungry last night in the hope that I'd snap and turn on Zoro and you could then kill me or were you just being stupid? Because using Zoro as bait is a whole new low in your already deep pit of poor choices." Sanji asks.
The thought had been churning around in his mind since last night, did they know? Didn't they? Did they figure that it was like blood in the water for him and he could just override Zoro's consent, which he couldn't and even if he could he wouldn't.
"What are you… oh." Franky says, his eyes going wide as he realises. Accident then. What idiots.
"You were watching?" Robin demands in a horrified shriek.
"Watching what?" Usopp questions, looking at the pair.
"I hardly had a choice, the two of you may as well have been in the same room. You may as well have been in the same bed." Sanji snorts.
"Oh." Nami gasps as she catches up to what happened.
"You creep!" Robin snarls, her face red with either embarrassment or anger. She raises her hand and runes coil up and down her arm as she formulates a spell to throw at him.
Half of the table yells 'no!' at her and Franky pulls her arm up and away from Sanji's direction as Sanji smiles on smugly. That wouldn't have hurt him but boy would it have set him free.
"Don't bait them." Zoro says quietly to him.
"It wasn't my intention, it's still funny though." Sanji grins.
"I want my bag back too, with my wand and my sword in it as well." Zoro adds, finally looking up from his food to the rest of the group.
"Zoro, no. Letting you do magic in your current state is-" Robin begins to explain but Zoro stands up suddenly, knocking his chair behind him and slamming his hands on the table.
"I'm not listening to this. It was one thing when you were all startled and scared, it was horrible but I could at least… panic is tough. But this is something I can't deal with. I don't want to hear anything from any of you that isn't begging for forgiveness from me and Sanji both." Zoro snarls.
"Zoro, we're just trying to help you because we love you." Usopp insists.
"Wow, do you mean the time you fucked up on an assignment and nearly tortured me to death, saved only by Sanji healing me at the last moment. Or do you mean the time you broke my trust, kidnapped me and tried to murder my boyfriend? I can't keep all the times you've been helpful straight, seeing as they usually end with me on the verge of death. God, I'd hate to see what you do to people that you don't like!" Zoro shouts at him. Sanji stares and vaguely wishes that he had popcorn. Usopp looks like he might cry, Sanji couldn't be more pleased about that.
"Hey, leave Usopp alone!" Luffy shouts, also getting to his feet.
"I'm not doing this. Just tell me when Kuina gets here with my stuff." Zoro groans and walks off.
"OI!" Luffy yells, leaping the table and running after Zoro. He grabs him by the shoulder and jerks him back. Sanji is already half out of his seat when Zoro turns to face him.
"That's starting to hurt." Zoro hisses and Sanji feels the ring in his left horn hum warningly as the deal wavers, edging them all closer to all bets being off. Luffy's ring evidently does the same, his is banded around one bicep. The kid is smart enough to know what Zoro means and lets go of him immediately.
"You know, I should be thanking you. Without you I'd never have met Sanji at all." Zoro says lowly, advancing on Luffy.
"What're you talking about?" Luffy says, backing up.
"Oh, none of you geniuses thought to wonder how Sanji and I met in the first place? I sure as shit didn't summon an incubus unprompted on my own. Why would I? No, I got him thanks to you." Zoro says, jabbing his finger in Luffy's chest.
"I didn't summon him!" Luffy argues, still backing up.
"No, your deranged stalker did. The girl who won't take no for an answer and threatened any of us who tried to keep you two apart. I knew that if I left her alone she'd either force you into something terrible or go full yandere on us. I tried to keep her away from you and she tried to murder me by siccing Sanji on me. Only it didn't work." Zoro hisses at him.
"And you know what, even after that I still had your goddamn back because she wasn't backing down. I had to blackmail her with her failed murder attempt to get her to back down because I thought we were friends." Zoro says and at least here Sanji can hear the hurt in Zoro's voice, even though he's trying to keep it contained.
"Zoro, we are friends." Luffy insists desperately.
"No we're not." Zoro mumbles and walks off. This time no one stops him.
Sanji runs his tongue across his sharp teeth and sighs, he's pretty sure that Zoro wants to be alone right now. He's being followed everywhere in this house when he's with Sanji so he likely just wants to sit and be angry.
"Just the monsters left at the table then." Sanji says airily and drinks the last of his coffee.
"We're not monsters, you are." Usopp snaps, glaring at Sanji from across the table.
"Sure, I'm a monster because I kill people." Sanji sighs, leaning his head back.
"But I gotta eat, if I don't do my job I die. Hardly a choice. And it's not like we're just running amok up here, humans summon us of their own free will. So fine, I'm a monster but at least I don't make it personal." Sanji says, looking at them all.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Robin demands, frowning disapprovingly at Sanji.
"Well I kill people because I have to in order to live. But civilised people like you just befriend a guy, make him love you and then when he does something you don't approve of you fuck his brain. Sirens used to use that power of yours to mind control people to their deaths so that they could eat, but not you. You do the far more humane thing and keep him captive, rummage around in his brain without his consent, make him tell you things he doesn't want to tell you. That's so much better." Sanji says silkily.
"And then doctor violates goodness knows how many oaths to drug him without his consent. You know, the only difference between torture and medical practice is that the patient agrees to it. See, even monsters like me know that. I can whip someone all night but only if they ask me to, otherwise I can't. Consent. It's like… real fuckin simple." Sanji snorts.
"But see, my theory is that you're all monsters. I don't just mean for what you've done, though there is that. No you're monsters for the non human halves of you. Humans used to tell horror stories about your kinds but now you're in the light insisting that you're not that bad. That just because you're part harpy doesn't mean you're a real monster, not like a demon. You've gotta have someone who's still evil down to the bones, someone to claim you're better than." Sanji laughs.
"You are worse than me, I've never killed anyone." Nami says furiously.
"But you want to, don't you? I mean you leapt at trying to kill me and I'd never met you. So I'm just trying to imagine what you feel about the other students who pick on you. Don't you feel like sinking your claws into them and showing them just what you really are?" Sanji purrs. He can physically feel Nami's anger rising and he can see her arms shifting from human to wings and if he's not much mistaken that's claws he can hear scraping the floor.
"Nami! Don't give him the satisfaction!" Robin chides her.
"You're not better than me, but you all just tortured Zoro to try to prove that you are and you have the gall to keep saying that you were right to do it, straight to his face." Sanji sneers and stands up. He picks up Zoro's full coffee cup and walks out of the room, leaving the rest of them to deal with that bombshell.
Sanji hopes that they apologise to Zoro. Not because he wants them to be friends again, because goodness knows he doesn't. He just thinks that it might make Zoro feel a little better.
Sanji walks along the hallway with a smile on his face, this isn't the burning of mortals that he's used to but he'll take it. Sanji doesn't know why demons get such a bad rap, for the most part they just punish bad people or those greedy enough to want something for nothing. Sanji's in the latter department, no one gets his talented body into bed without paying for it. Oh, people try to make wards or talismans that'll keep their souls safe but Sanji has never lost to those and he always gets his prize. In fact the only time he was ever summoned by a human and not collected a soul was Zoro.
Zoro's so much more than a job now, though. Sanji wants to make him happy in any way we can, but right now all Sanji can bring him is his coffee.
Although, perhaps he can do more.
He pauses in the hallway, well out of sight of the others. This will take a little magic and he should probably conserve what he has as he doesn't know how long it'll be until he's released from this deal and is allowed to eat again. But finding Zoro's bag with his wand and sword in it will make him happy and Sanji would risk a little hunger just to see Zoro smile.
He holds up the coffee mug before him and shifts his grip on it so that he's holding it by the top. Sanji then quietly whispers an incantation, focusing on how Zoro held the mug when he delivered it to him. The rest of the world around of him fades into black and white as the handle of the mug lights up in a brilliant lime green. Sanji can even see Zoro's distinct thumbprint, excellent.
Sanji looks up and sees a green mist winding through the air and green footprints on the hallway carpet and up the stairs. Now all Sanji has to do is to look around the house and find the neon green backpack and he's a winner. He starts with the door nearest him but pauses with his hand on the handle. His skin is green all over. Here and there the green has breaks in it enough to see the green shadows of Zoro's fingers. Sanji lifts up his shirt to see a few distinct arm shaped smears of green and fingers tight on Sanji's hip. Zoro must have cuddled him in the night when they were both sleeping, he could practically scream with joy but he won't as he doesn't want to be caught snooping.
The first room is a small library and a quick inspection reveals no backpack. The next is storage, still no backpack. Under the stairs is suitcases and no backpack. The next floor up is a plethora of bedrooms. Like Zoro's these have a few nick-knacks still in them but by and large the rooms are sparse from where their occupants moved out some time ago. He makes a guess that the room with a machine oil smell is Franky's room, but there's no bag there. The next three rooms turn up nothing and Sanji is starting to lose hope until he finds the room where all of the furniture is smaller. There's a smaller bed, a lower desk and chair and there's fur on the floor. Chopper lives here. Most damning of all is Zoro's bag tucked casually under the desk, radioactively green. Sanji reaches under and grabs it, he shuts the door behind him and hightails it up to Zoro's room. He drops the spell before he gets there, looking at Zoro would be eye searing with that spell and he doesn't feel like getting a migraine for no reason.
"It's me." Sanji announces himself as he shoulders the door open carefully. He doesn't want Zoro to think that he's one of the others and then just slam it on it and spill all this coffee. Sanji also is wary of getting coffee inside Zoro's bag. Seeing as the man has got a whole sword in there as well as a bunch of other shit Sanji knows that he's enchanted it to be bigger on the inside than the outside and sometimes those spells don't play nice with liquids.
"Hi me." Zoro replies flatly. He's got his back to Sanji and is leaning out of his big circular window again, perhaps keeping an eye out for his sister. Zoro didn't even turn around when he came in.
Sanji shuts the door behind him and walks over to Zoro. He reaches around him and holds the coffee cup out.
"Brought you a few things." Sanji says quietly.
"Hey, thanks." Zoro smiles softly and takes the mug. He then nearly drops it when he turns around and sees his bag hanging from Sanji's hand.
"Where did you find that?" He gasps, taking it back from Sanji.
"In Chopper's room. I know you wanted your stuff back and it creeps me out to think of them all pawing through it." Sanji says.
"Agreed." Zoro nods and places his coffee cup on the chest of drawers and kneels down and rifles through his bag, pulling out all kinds of things. Books, papers, pens, his sword, his wand and also his broomstick. Sanji is pretty sure that Zoro's still got more crap in there that he's probably forgotten about but he's hardly going to encourage Zoro to clutter up their small shared room more than he already has.
"It feels so good to have this back." Zoro sighs happily, his sword in one hand and his wand in the other.
"Which one?" Sanji asks curiously.
"I meant the wand but I hate not knowing where my sword is, it's a family heirloom. I don't know what I'd do if I lost it for good." Zoro tells him, his mouth pulling down in a small frown at the mere thought.
"Well hopefully that won't happen." Sanji says.
Zoro looks at his wand thoughtfully and then at the door to his room.
"Are you trying to lock everyone else out?" Sanji guesses.
"Thinking about it. The problem is that I'm not smarter at that than all of them put together and they'd just leap to the conclusion that you'd made me do it so you could... I don't know, murder me and suck the marrow from my bones or something." Zoro says with a sad sigh.
"I don't think that's what they're worried about me sucking, Zoro." Sanji smirks.
"Ugh, thanks for that." Zoro says, trying to act annoyed but Sanji knows him well enough by now to see the small quirk in his lips of a suppressed smile.
"You're so welcome." Sanji says in his best formal voice and that makes Zoro laugh, Sanji knew he was just pretending!
"I was thinking about casting a spell that'd hurt me if they broke it and letting them know about it, that way they couldn't get in without voiding the deal. But I don't think that's a good idea." Zoro sighs, his mirth falling away from him.
"It sounds like setting up an ambush to me, especially when it's a group of people who want to try to kill me." Sanji agrees with a sigh.
Zoro sits down on his bed and idly moves his wand through the air, tracing green swirls of light and fractal patterns that look like radioactive snowflakes.
"What even is our plan here?" Zoro asks, looking up at Sanji.
"My plan was to keep you alive, I didn't think too much further. I mean, I made a deal that favoured me and not them but I didn't think too much on the specifics aside from leaving me room to enact revenge if you died." Sanji admits a little sheepishly.
"Well I'm not dead. And I can't let this deal break until I'm convinced that they won't just summon you back and try and kill you again afterwards, but I can't keep you here forever because you'll starve. Can you apply to some higher demon authority to change your name or something?" Zoro asks hopefully.
"I think you know the answer to that." Sanji tells him gently.
"I know, I know. Your name is your soul manifested as a word, but maybe you could argue that you're a different person than you were when you were born and just get, I don't know, a slight spelling change. Enough for their summoning spell not to work." Zoro says.
"Zoro, my soul is the unchangeable part of me. That part that survives when nothing else does." Sanji tells him, getting closer to Zoro and running his hands through the green hair there.
"Yeah, but..." Zoro tries again.
"Say my name Zoro, really say it." Sanji orders him.
Zoro hesitates but he eventually does speak Sanji's name. Not in the mere human reproduction of sound that he usually does, but with all the emphasis that he uses to summon him. Sanji feels it like a thousand hands smoothing over his skin and dragging him to Zoro, it feels like Zoro has perfectly prised his ribcage apart and kissed his very heart, it feels both like being owned entirely by him and being freer than he ever has been.
He opens his eyes, feeling a little dazed and stupidly happy. It's so much stronger with Zoro now than it used to be.
"Do you think I can change that name?" Sanji asks quietly and Zoro shakes his head softly.
"So... from what I see, I have two choices. I either get them to accept us and agree to not hurt you or..." Zoro trails off and rubs at his temples, looking incredibly stressed.
"Or?" Sanji prompts.
"Or I work out a memory erasing charm that will make them forget both of us, but is strong enough that it'll stick to all of them despite their range of species. Of course the school would notice the charm, it's illegal to do, so I'd be arrested. The only way to avoid that is to charm all of them and disappear, drop out of school and run away. I don't know if I'd have to take my sister or not, it depends if she might trigger their memories. I know I couldn't bring myself to erase her memory of me." Zoro says, his voice deadly serious.
"You'd be a criminal on the run for the rest of your life. What about your future? You've worked so hard to be as good a witch as you are, you can't just throw all that away." Sanji protests.
"For your life I can." Zoro answers firmly.
"I can't let you do that Zoro." Sanji says. He's already diverted Zoro off of his demon hunter career path, which Sanji isn't exactly sorry about but it certainly was a big upheaval in the course of Zoro's life.
"Then we have to get them to like you. We have to get them to want to protect your life like they do mine." Zoro says seriously, he looks over at Sanji as the demon feels himself cringe.
"Hey, they like you and I've seen how bad for your health that is. I'm not exactly keen to be on that level with them." Sanji grimaces.
"Well if you want them to not get you killed then that's what you need. And face it, you've got a captive audience here. I don't know how long you can go without food and we need to start putting our efforts into one plan or the other." Zoro insists.
Sanji's tail flicks anxiously, only stopping when Zoro reaches out to cautiously touch it. At that point it snares its way around Zoro's fingers and up his wrist, the damn thing pretty much has a mind of its own. He hardly wants to be friends with these people, Brook was ironically spineless at breakfast, he didn't stand up for Zoro this morning but he didn't agree with the others either. That said Brook is still the least awful of the others and Sanji doesn't want to be friends with any of them.
He's also not happy with Zoro pushing the nuclear button on his life to save Sanji. He tries to imagine what that life will be like for him and Zoro. Forever wondering if the others are going to remember him and summon him, moving from place to place so that Zoro can avoid magical law enforcement for his crimes. It's not the life that Sanji wants for the man that he loves. Zoro's not going to live long so his short human years shouldn't be filled with hardship.
"Do I have to genuinely like them or just fake it?" Sanji asks unhappily.
"I don't know. I keep wondering the same thing." Zoro says with a sigh.
"I keep having these moments where I see them or hear them talking and I forget what they did, it's like the idea of it is too big to keep in my head. I don't like being angry at them, I don't like feeling like crap all of the time because of it." Zoro mutters and glares at the floor hard.
"But also they don't deserve your forgiveness?" Sanji guesses. He sure as shit hopes that's what Zoro means.
"Not without at least apologising." Zoro says with a nod.
Sanji leans back against the wall, his horns just scraping the paint. They're getting longer as his glamour fades and his body's natural ability to fake human gets more and more tired out without food. He has to make nice with Zoro's friends and get them to like him.
"You know I have no idea how to make people like me." Sanji says quietly.
"Isn't that part of your job?" Zoro asks him and laughs quietly. Sanji tightens his tail around Zoro's wrist for that smart remark, not enough to hurt of course. He wouldn't want to do that even without the deal getting in the way.
"I know how to make them want to fuck me, it's not the same." Sanji says snippily.
"Well, you made me like you pretty quickly." Zoro tells him, leaning back against the wall as well and pressing himself against Sanji's side.
"Yeah but I didn't hate you to start with like I do with them." Sanji sneers in distaste. He definitely didn't have anywhere near the kind of loathing for Zoro that he does for them.
"You figured it was my fault you'd be stuck on Earth, though I'm pretty sure your old man would have summoned you back and you kind of overreacted a little at first." Zoro points out.
"Hey, the previous time before that when I was stuck up here was when I nearly died from starvation. I wasn't thinking straight, and Zeff showing up on Earth could spark the end of the world, I didn't know if he'd be able to come at all. Plus people can't just summon me when I'm at work unless they have the clearance for that and- look it's more complicated than you're making out, fuck you very much!" Sanji snarls and Zoro laughs sweetly.
"Maybe we can hang out with Brook, he's a good guy I promise. He's a big fan of puns and he plays the violin. And maybe if the others see you being yourself around Brook then they'll see what I see in you." Zoro says softly. Sanji looks sidelong and him and sees the gentle way that Zoro is watching him. Zoro really does love him, Sanji isn't sure what he did to deserve such a thing but it's the strongest feature of Zoro's species. It's almost overwhelming to feel.
"Well, I hope they don't see exactly what you see. I don't want to date the rest of them." Sanji teases.
"Good. I don't want to share." Zoro laughs.
"Okay, fine, I'll go talk to your lich friend. You study or something, I'll let you know if your cool sister shows up." Sanji declares, untangling himself from Zoro and hopping up off of the bed.
"You're going to go right now?" Zoro asks, clearly surprised.
"Things you don't want to do don't get any more appealing by putting them off." Sanji says wisely, as if it's not just the kind of thing that Zeff routinely lectures him on when Sanji is procrastinating with chores that he doesn't want to do.
"Well, okay then." Zoro nods and goes to pick up one of his books that he unpacked. He settles on the bed to read, he's stretched out on his front and his shirt is riding up a little in the back. Sanji's hands itch to rub the exposed skin. He's given plenty of sensual massages in his time and he's damn good at it. Would Zoro like that or would it be too sexual for him? Surely the sexual part of it is in the intent and the amount of clothes kept on, right? Damnit, all he wants is to make Zoro feel good and make him relax, he deserves that.
Sanji resists that particular temptation and leaves the relative safety of Zoro's room. Out in the hallway he can hear people talking downstairs, but none of the voices are Brook's. With that in mind Sanji goes past the stairs and instead goes to the room that he suspects is Brook's from what the man said the night before. Sanji knocks uneasily on the door twice and waits, after a moment it opens and he looks up into the bare skull of the occupant.
"Sanji, I didn't expect to see you." Brook remarks with some surprise in his tone.
"Well, if it makes you feel better, I didn't expect to be at your door either." Sanji admits.
"Is Zoro okay?" Brook asks.
"He's fine, he's studying and waiting for Kuina to get here." Sanji replies. Look at him, holding a whole conversation with Brook all by himself. Does the man like him yet? Can Sanji call it a job done and leave? Please?
"I see." Brook nods thoughtfully, his afro wobbling slightly with the movement. Sanji wonders how it's still attached to his skull but Sanji vaguely remembers that liches can choose to retain certain parts of themselves. Or that might have been an explanation Sanji made up when he was a kid bored out of his mind in class and confronted with pictures of lich who still had breasts despite being skeletal elsewhere.
"Please, come in." Brook offers, stepping aside and holding open his door for Sanji.
Sanji hesitates but eventually goes inside. If Brook tries to hurt him then the deal is off and Sanji knows that he can take down one lich solo if he has to. Not to mention that Zoro is just down the hall and would clearly come to his aid.
Brook's room is very sparsely decorated and the few ways in which it is decorated is mainly with photographs. Around his full length mirror there are tonnes of photos tucked into the frame of the mirror. Pictures of Brook and his friends together over the years, Zoro looks noticeably younger in some of them. They all look so happy.
"I have a good memory, but the more you remember something the more you alter it. Photographs are proof that something happened, they make you remember things as they really were." Brook explains soberly and walks to his window. He has a small shelf under his with a kettle and a few mugs and copious amounts of boxes.
"Tea?" Brook offers.
"Sure." Sanji says with a nod.
He looks at the photographs again. Brook is old. Not as old as Sanji, but he used to be human, he must feel incredibly ancient. Likely all of the people that he knew when he was younger are dead and nothing more than the memories of which Brook spoke. Someday everyone in these pictures but Brook will be dead. Before Zoro fell in love with him Sanji was facing the same fate with Zoro.
"Is it hard being older than them?" Sanji asks on impulse and Brook flicks the kettle on.
"Is it hard being older than Zoro?" Brook asks back and Sanji shakes his head.
"No, demons don't really age the same way humans do. We don't think of it the same. We have children, adults and really old demons. It's basically a huge middle category and everyone else a small sliver on either side. Zoro's an adult, I'm an adult, it's about the same. There's a few things but I mostly don't notice. But you… you used to be human, you must think of age like humans do, right?" Sanji presses and Brook nods.
"It is hard sometimes, knowing that I will outlive all of them. Well, not that I'm alive now but, ho ho, you know what I mean." Brook laughs, though there is little mirth in it.
"Well, if it wasn't for the fact that it'd make Zoro hate me I'd be perfectly happy with you outliving all of them today." Sanji mutters angrily.
"They're good people." Brook says and picks up several boxes of tea and holds them out to Sanji, he picks one at random.
"They don't seem like it." Sanji says and peers at a photo of Zoro and Usopp playing in a pool. Or Sanji assumes that it's Usopp, he doesn't suppose that you get many seals in backyard pools. Zoro is frozen laughing brightly in the photo as the seal splashes him.
"They're young, I'm afraid. When I was young and human schools like ours never let in anyone who wasn't human, or at least who couldn't pass for it. Things are different now of course but still the same, I am back at the same school still working to graduate and I think I'll have taken the longest of anyone ever! People like to think that there's no more problems anymore, no one else who should be there is being kept out. Like you said, there's always monsters." Brook says sadly and pours the boiling water into two cups.
"They don't like to think that they're like the people who kept them out. That they finally climbed up the ladder only to pull it up after them. I don't think any of them have killed a demon but they've trained to and if you're just a person then what does that make them?" Brook asks with a sigh and sits down onto a small stool. Sanji notices that Brook has pulled another out for him, he walks over and sits down.
"Monsters, I guess." Sanji says and wraps his hands around the fine teacup. His is different from Brook's and all of the stacked cups seem mismatched, it's charming in its own way. The one that Sanji has is a fine green with gold around the rim.
"Zoro bought me that one." Brook says pleasantly and Sanji holds it up and smiles.
"It's a sweet gift." Sanji remarks.
"He's a sweet man, deep down at least. But I think you know that, don't you?" Brook asks with a hint of amusement in his tone. Sanji reddens and nods his head.
"Franky is too, he's caring and observant. Chopper worries terribly about people and Usopp is always trying to be as good as he can for his friends in case they decide that he's not worth their time, not that we ever would think that of course. They're all good people. They're just scared and they love Zoro and they're frightened that they did something terrible, and that's okay if you're a monster but if you're not then they have to face that. They're young." Brook says sadly.
"That's a bullshit excuse." Sanji says firmly and drinks a swig of his tea in anger.
"It is but it's the truth." the lich nods and Sanji scowls at the tea.
"Well that does me no good. I'm supposed to be making friends with these jackasses so that we can end the deal and I can go home and they won't summon me back and we don't end up with rampant murder happening on one side or the other." Sanji exclaims in frustration.
"That would be ideal." Brook agrees and leans back and looks as thoughtful as it is possible to for someone with no eyes.
"The problem, I think is that they see you as an outsider." Brook says tapping the rim of his china cup thoughtfully. Sanji is sure there's a joke about bone china in there but he's not the type to make it, who even would?
"I am an outsider to them. They're all part human and I'm zero parts human. I've had a lot human parts in me but that doesn't seem to be better." Sanji snorts and Brook laughs loudly.
"Yes, I think not somehow. But I have an idea, leave it with me." Brook declares and downs his tea in one gulp. Sanji is not sure where that tea goes and from his experience with skeletal demon or demons with no conceivable way to hold liquids he's learnt never to ask.
"Well, uh, okay then. Thank you for the tea." Sanji says and drinks the last of his and awkwardly leaves as Brook tidies up and sets a laptop down on the table.
Zoro is far happier when Kuina arrives and brings him plenty more of his things. Clean clothes to wear, books to continue studying, even some food. It's all going well until they start to argue over the state of his apartment, which Zoro argues is from his friends fault for trashing the place. Kuina argues that his friends likely did not make a metric tonne of dirty laundry and cram it into several laundry baskets with the logic that if it's not flowing onto the floor then he doesn't need to do laundry.
Sanji excuses himself from the sibling bickering. He even attempts to help Kuina bring things in by levitating heavy boxes, only his magic cuts out on him from being so low that the things fall to the floor. Nami makes a mean joke about Sanji not being able to 'get it up' and in revenge the next day he melts all of the springs in her mattress, hides all of her shoelaces and removes the bristles from her toothbrush. It's not the hardcore smiting the demons specialise in but he consoles himself with the thought that giving her the anger equivalent of death of a thousand cuts is probably going to be decently satisfying.
Zoro has been awake for three days and is doing fine when Brook gathers them all in the living room of Kaya's mansion, she has turned out to be a surprisingly pleasant girl given her choice of company. Zoro for his part has been giving flat or no responses to his friends whenever they interact with him, aside from Brook.
"I know that things have not been great lately." Brook announces to all of them, who are sat on sofas and chairs around the lich who stands on the coffee table.
"That's an understatement." Sanji says, leaning across Zoro's shoulders from his perch on the arm of the armchair that Zoro is sat in.
"Get off the coffee table, man." Usopp whines from his place in loser central on the sofa.
"But I have just the plan that we need to turn things around!" Brook declares, taking no notice of Usopp's request.
"What is it?" Luffy asks excitedly.
"It's… a job! Just think of it, all of us together, fighting evil!" Brook says cheerfully.
"Brook, we're trying to fight evil right here." Franky says pointedly, looking at Sanji.
"Suck my dick." Sanji snaps back angrily.
"There are so many reasons that won't happen." Robin interjects and then looks up at Brook.
"Brook, I don't think that an outside job is the kind of thing that we should be doing." Robin says to Brook, a little more calmly than she had been speaking to Sanji.
"And I don't want to do anything with you people. And I'd agree to you, me and Sanji if just three people on a job wasn't a really bad idea, Brook." Zoro states.
"Why are you so much nicer to Brook than us, huh?" Luffy demands angrily, getting up off of the sofa.
"Because he apologised and admitted he was wrong, if the deal could be broken piecemeal Sanji would have let him out of it already. The rest of you are still being assholes so I still don't want to have anything to do with you." Zoro retorts.
"Zoro, trust me, I think this will be a good idea." Brook insists and Sanji looks at Zoro as he sighs deeply and slides a little lower down in his chair.
"Fine." Zoro says grudgingly and Brook claps his bony hands together in excitement.
"I also think that this is going to be a good idea." Usopp says thoughtfully.
"What? Why?" Nami asks in alarm.
"Zoro has a bodyguard who has to protect him, he's safer than ever. And if he fails to do so then the deal is off and we can throw him back in that circle again." Usopp grins.
"Your badly written deal doesn't work that way." Zoro sighs.
"Unfortunately I have to agree with Zoro. Sanji is entirely allowed to allow us or even Zoro to come to harm as long as it can't be argued that he arranged that harm to happen and even that's shakey. And as Zoro pointed out before the penalty for breaking the deal is… the deal isn't on anymore. It really was badly worded, but I panicked." Nami says morosely.
Sanji wishes that he could be more smug about it but as long as Zoro has any feelings for these people their wellbeing is too much of a risk for Sanji to gamble with. If he allows a werewolf or whatever they're going off to fight to tear them apart and Zoro resents or blames him for it then it may well kill their bond and also Sanji. He has to be Zoro's bodyguard and theirs if he wants to live, it's just not Nami's poorly thought out deal compelling him.
"I'll come and I'll protect Zoro if I need to, not that I think he needs me much. But I make no promises to be helpful on your mission." Sanji says, well aware that pettiness is about the level of evil that he's able to inflict on these fuckers.
"Great. Brook, what kind of job is this anyway?" Luffy asks and Brook turns to look at him.
"A small village a few hours flight from here has had people going missing, apparently a lot of the other residents are also acting really weird about it. Refusing to talk about the missing people, acting like nothing is wrong. Eight people are missing already and the police haven't turned up any mundane reason for it." Brook explains.
"It sounds like they need our help, demon or not we should go." Franky says seriously.
"It could be anything, though." Luffy grumbles.
"You mean it could be something like cursed items and not someone you get to punch in the face." Chopper laughs and Luffy pouts, that'd be a yes then.
"Yeah. But, sure, we'll go." Luffy nods.
"Alright, everyone gather your things and meet back down here in fifteen minutes." Nami declares and everyone splits up, heading to their own rooms. Brook of course follows Sanji and Zoro up to their floor cheerfully.
"I think this will give them a chance to see you in a new light and realise their misconceptions of you on their own. Me telling them that I think you're not a bad person is not going to change their minds, that old adage about 'you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink' applies here I think. But this could make them change independently." Brook says.
"I hope so." Zoro says, and he sounds so tired.
Sanji lingers in the hallway as Zoro and Brook go off to gather their things in their rooms, books or supplies that they may need. He hates that every time Zoro thinks of how his friends are treating them both it seems to hurt him all over again. Zoro doesn't seem like the kind of man to take small things personally but this is so huge that it seems to keep opening that wound again and again. He loves his friends and right now the strength of that connection is wounding him. Sanji supposes that this kind of thing is humanity all over, love their biggest strength and greatest downfall.
Sanji has family and he has some work buddies but nothing like Zoro has with these people. He's not totally sure that he can relate. He's also pretty sure that there's not much he can do to fix this. They either have to apologise to him and try to heal their bond or Zoro has to let time pass so his connection to them can die. Neither of those are especially helpful right now.
Before too long Zoro comes out of his room with his backpack on and his broom over one shoulder. He looks at Sanji curiously and so Sanji bounces to his feet and flashes Zoro a smile. He doesn't need to make the man worry on top of everything else that he has going on.
"Are you planning on cleaning your room with that? I should message your sister and let her know, she will be pleased." Sanji teases him and Zoro rolls his eyes.
"Shut up and follow me." Zoro groans as he moves past Sanji and heads down the stairs.
As Zoro walks past him Sanji can smell, well, Zoro. That mix of his shower gel, whatever he washes his clothes with and the few magical ingredients that he keeps in his bag like dried mint. It's a certain constellation of scents that blend together and get labelled as 'Zoro' in Sanji's mind. In the same way that cooking oil, pepper and horse hair are Zeff and home to him.
With Zoro still in the air, as clear as the magical green trail from a few days ago, and watching him walk down the stairs Sanji feels… hungry. Not the kind that can be resolved with the food in the kitchen downstairs or even the demonic food from Zeff's kitchen. No, this is a more… incubus specific hunger. It's inaccurate to say that incubi and succubi have sex drives in the same way that humans do, no they have sex drives in the same way that humans have a drive to eat. Which is to say that his desire for sex doesn't define him but if he goes long enough without it then it'll start to stick in his mind. And besides Zoro is very, very, attractive. Sanji has never been so repulsed by someone physically to be unable to do his job but he certainly is aware that he'd prefer Zoro to most people that he's slept with.
Zoro pauses at the bottom of the stairs and talks to Brook, saying something about something. Sanji isn't listening, he's just looking at Zoro's mouth wishfully. He wants…
Sanji shakes himself out of it. Damnit, no, sure he's hungry and that's not his fault but he cannot have sex with Zoro. Reason number one being that Zoro doesn't want to and reason two being that even if he did it would kill them both, making it very short term gratification followed by certain death. Fuck, he needs to eat and soon because he cannot be following Zoro around looking at him like he's lunch.
"Hey, are you coming with or not?" Zoro shouts up the stairs to him.
"I'm not able to stay here alone anyway so I don't have a choice. Don't pitch a fit." Sanji shouts back and jogs down the stairs.
"You're not worried about me, are you?" Zoro asks as Sanji comes to a stop by him.
"What? No. Although I have heard stories. But I'm sure you'll be fine and if not I'm here to help, we're a team." Sanji assures him.
"Aww!" Brook says teasingly and Zoro punches him in his boney shoulder and clearly immediately regrets it.
"I like these jobs, we get to earn money and help people out. They all met and rescued me on one of these jobs. We've rehabilitated werewolves and vampires and all sorts, relocated magical creatures and even exorcised a few ghosts." Brook says cheerfully as they head down the next flight of stairs.
"Killed any demons?" Sanji asks warily.
"No." Zoro says firmly.
"We can always hope." Robin says as they come to the bottom of the stairs. Sanji glares at the siren and gets similar glares back from the rest of the group, it seems like everyone was there ahead of them.
"Oh good, we're all here!" Brook says with forced cheerfulness and walks over to the table and unfolds a map.
"This is where we're going, our contact there is a Ms Greaves. I tried to contact her just now to let her know that we're on the way but I couldn't get through to her. Hopefully she'll call me back in the air or we'll just meet her there." Brook explains and they all look over the map.
"How is Sanji getting there?" Luffy asks, looking Sanji up and down.
"I'm guessing that it's too far to do what you did before?" Zoro asks quietly and Sanji nods. Even if he did have enough magic left to pull that off it would be a really inefficient way of getting there.
"Well, you can ride with me." Zoro offers.
"I might stop you getting lost." Sanji teases and Zoro's expression sours.
"No way are you riding with Zoro, I don't trust you together." Usopp pipes up, getting between them. Sanji growls but he doesn't seem deterred, it doesn't help that the threat is pretty toothless given their deal.
"Funny, I don't trust any of you with him." Zoro responds.
"As fun as hearing this argument over and over is, would everyone be happy if Sanji was to ride on my broom with me?" Brook suggests loudly. Everyone seems to look back and forth at each other, trying to gauge everyone's reaction to that idea.
"Sanji?" Zoro prompts.
"Yeah, I'm happy with Brook. The dead guy's cool." Sanji agrees with a nod.
"Yo ho ho! That's because I have no blood to keep me warm!" Brook trills with laughter and several of the group groan.
"Great, then let's go. Lead the way Brook." Zoro says and the lich brightens, sweeping his own broom up over his shoulder and leading them all outside.
Once outdoors in the clean air outside the house Brook holds his broom at hip height and climbs on. Sanji does the same, resting one hand on the broom itself and one on Brook's skeletal hip. The lich kicks them up into the air with a burst of magic from the broom and they're soaring right away.
The others take to the sky behind them and Sanji's tail curls around the bristles of the broom as he cautiously looks down at the ground below. They're pretty high up and the fall wouldn't kill him but it would still hurt a whole lot. He watches as roads and houses spiral out in organic patterns, becoming organised and gridlike as they get more dense around towns. It's not the same way that Sanji's home is laid out, everything here is on the same level, even if the elevation changes. Multi-floor buildings are the closest humans get to the truly three dimensional makeup of Sanji's home.
He can see people walking here and there, cars and busses shipping people to their destinations. Restaurants, schools and office buildings are laid out. It's strange seeing humans just living en masse, without interacting with them sexually they're still pretty alien to Sanji.
After a while the novelty of even that passes and craning his neck to see Zoro is difficult, besides Zoro can't hear him over the wind anyway. The trip becomes… boring.
"This is the least fun I've ever had riding anyone's anything." Sanji bemoans. He wasn't expecting Brook to be able to hear him but the man bursts into uproarious laughter and nearly loses control of the broom and plummets them a good twenty feet through the air before he gets a hold of himself enough to fly right again.
Zoro made a valiant effort to dive after them but by the time he got there Brook was flying fine.
"WHAT HAPPENED?" Zoro yells over the wind but Brook shakes his head, still laughing.
Zoro rolls his eyes a little bit and falls back on his broom to reassuringly stroke Sanji's hair before he falls back into formation with the others. It takes another hour after that for them to get there.
The village of whatever this place is (Sanji hadn't been paying that much attention before) is set in the middle of fucking nowhere, surrounded by approximately far too many shitty trees which entirely impede Brook's ability to land and let Sanji get the hell off.
He scrambles off as soon as he can and settles himself at Zoro's side as the others go over the details of the case again and where their contact is. Sanji is not paying attention at all, instead he is focusing on casually and calmly sliding his arms around Zoro's waist and getting as close to him as he can. He never used to be physically affectionate with people outside of sex and even that was very different, but dating Zoro has got him hooked on casual affection. Really, Zoro is the one doing the seducing in their relationship. With his casual arm around Sanji's shoulder when they watch movies or holding his hand, not to mention when Zoro kisses him. He's totally ruined Sanji.
"Are you even listening?" Zoro asks quietly.
"I'm your bodyguard, I'm guarding your body. I didn't agree to be helpful." Sanji says into the back of Zoro's shirt.
"But you could be." Zoro points out and reaches back to tug on one of Sanji's horns.
"Nothing in it for me." Sanji replies and nuzzles the back of Zoro's neck. He's good right here, thanks.
"We could get out of here faster." Zoro says persuasively and Sanji gives that a little thought.
"I'm so eager to get back on Brook's death broom of simultaneous terror and boredom. Pass." Sanji says flatly.
"So you're not going to help?" Luffy asks and Sanji lets go of Zoro to look at the straw hat wearing human.
"Do you want me to help?" Sanji asks.
"Well, yeah." Luffy says with a slight frown.
"Oh, that's good to know. I'm absolutely not helping you ever, go drown." Sanji chirps and turns his back on the man.
"Weren't you mean to be building bridges?" Zoro whispers, giving Sanji a pointed look.
"But burning them is so much more satisfying." Sanji whines. Zoro shakes his head and pulls his bag off of his back and takes out a woolen hat and puts it on Sanji's head, taking care to cover his horns entirely.
"Keep this on, it'll keep anyone else from trying to trap you in a circle and destroy you again." Zoro tells him and Sanji winds his tail around his waist and tugs his sweater a little lower to cover it, that's good enough to pass for human-ish.
"Now come on, let's get this over with." Zoro says and hefts his backpack once more and walks off.
"Zoro, it's the other way." Brook calls. Distantly Zoro swears and walks back past Sanji and their whole group sets off into the villiage proper to start their detective work on whatever local magical thing is causing all these troubles. Sanji just follows Zoro and tries not to feel too hungry.
Sanji leans over, resting his head on Zoro's shoulder as Nami talks to the terrified local man who is insisting that there is nothing wrong here, no ma'am you can all go now please. This conversation is boring and these people are boring.
A prickle of being watched runs over Sanji's skin and he turns his head and looks at the nearby woodland. Up until now Sanji has sensed jack shit in the way of the supernatural. He squints at the trees, there's nothing there but there's a conspicuous nothing there, like his eyes are skipping over what is. He focuses and he sees the figure. Ah, so that's what this is. He makes eye contact with it, with him in fact, and wraps his arm around Zoro's tightly. He flashes a polite smile but the figure does not return it.
Hmm.
Curiously he hums a good few bars of an old childhood song, one he remembers Zeff humming in the kitchen. Greensleeves. The figure smiles and Sanji stops with a polite little nod, the creature returns it and Sanji stops looking and focuses back on the group who are now debating amongst themselves about what to do. Zoro is mostly refusing to participate.
"So, not that I care about your mystery or feel like helping but I just want to clarify something. If whatever is causing this trouble tries to harm Zoro I can kill it, but I can eat it first, right?" Sanji says and they all stare at him.
"As in have sex with it?" Zoro asks in surprise.
"I could but I meant far more literally. Not that I have any beef with this creature, not unless it harms you of course. I'd just hate to see something that I can actually eat go to waste." Sanji sighs wistfully.
"I don't think we can actually stop him if it's not human." Usopp whispers too loudly.
"It's the circle of life! Sanji, do you know what is going on here?" Brook asks congenially and Sanji nods.
"Care to share?" Zoro prompts and Sanji shakes his head.
"I would be happier with you giving up and going home so that you're not in danger at all. I have no intention of helping unless you're in mortal danger." Sanji informs him and Zoro frowns.
"Well I would like it if you just told us and we could deal with whatever this is and go back to the house." Zoro says with a frown.
"And letting you tangle with this is getting awfully close to putting you in harm's way, my hands are tied." Sanji replies easily.
"That is a very charitable interpretation of that very loose command." Zoro tells him flatly and Sanji shrugs, not sorry at all.
"Well, I say we keep knocking on doors and asking questions." Franky suggests and the others nod.
The village is small, he can see from one end of it to the other more or less in one go. Luffy knocks sharply on a door and a thin, shaking woman opens it and looks at everyone in fear.
"Hello?" She says after a false start or two. She's careful with her words.
"Hello, we're from the university. Ms Greaves called us here but we can't find her house, she said that there had been disappearances lately and we're here to help. Do you know where she lives or could you tell us anything?" Robin asks with a smile.
"I- no I can't. There's nothing here and everything is good. You- Ms Greaves doesn't live in the village anymore." the woman says shakily. Sanji smiles, he bets she doesn't live here anymore.
"Mmm, Zoro, you brought your sword didn't you?" Sanji asks quietly.
"Of course I did." Zoro answers.
"Great, great. Uh, remind me what that sword of yours is made of again please?" Sanji whispers, tugging on Zoro's arm.
"Iron. Why?" Zoro asks with a frown.
"Couldn't remember." Sanji answers.
"Is that import- oh. OH. Miss, tell me about the forest." Zoro says quickly. The woman's eyes go wide and the door slams shut.
Zoro stares at the door and then backs away, turning to look at the other houses.
"What is it?" Brook asks curiously.
"That house is deserted and that one there is where our contact lived, or that's the address we have for her. What is the difference between those two houses and this one?" Zoro says as he pulls his sword out of his bag.
"They're newer?" Nami guesses.
"She didn't ask us our names or give us hers, she didn't invite us in and there are iron nails in her door and in that house over that way, that one has iron gates but those empty houses have plastic doors. Also, Sanji just asked me what my sword was made of." Zoro growls angrily and looks around, peering at the woodland accusingly.
"You don't mean…" Robin pauses and looks around uneasily "fair folk?"
"Yes I do." Zoro mutters and then looks right at Sanji.
"You didn't tell me? You know how I feel about them." Zoro says accusingly.
"I basically told you, don't give me that. Besides, you know I'd rather you were far away from here and I know you well enough to know that my chances of getting you out of here willingly are slim to none now. But whatever, if you wanna stay and fight these things then like I said just let me eat." Sanji says with a shrug and Zoro mutters unhappily.
"Oh, we… we should go." Usopp whispers.
"We can't leave these people at their mercy." Zoro snaps.
"Zoro's right, we need to stop this." Luffy agrees.
"We know nothing about how many there are though, or how we can find them." Robin says grimly.
"But, we do have a metal man, a guy with an iron sword and a demon contractually bound to protect at least Zoro, and the rest of us if he wants to keep Zoro happy. This is probably the best chance we'll have here." Nami points out with a sly smile.
"You really do know how to spoil a man's appetite." Sanji mutters, he doesn't like being her weapon.
"Chopper, do you think that you can track them? Woodland is kind of your thing." Luffy asks, looking at the little reindeer.
"Or he can tell us." Nami says, looking right at Sanji.
"I never said I would help." Sanji sneers at her and she bares her teeth at him.
"Please?" Zoro asks softly, touching Sanji's shoulder and that's it, he's done for. He steps out of their group a little ways and looks into the woodland, he does more than that, he sees. But there's nothing there to see which is weird. Perhaps he scared it off?
"Huh. It was there earlier, watching us. But it's not there now." Sanji muses as he looks back to Zoro with a shrug.
"Damnit." Zoro sighs and runs his hands through his hair before turning back to his ex-friends with a frown.
"Everyone knows the rules for the fair folk, right?" He asks and Sanji sighs, he's still too nice to them. But then again Sanji has no choice but to protect them so it doesn't make much difference, but Zoro needn't care so much after what they did.
"Don't eat anything." Luffy says, making a face and Sanji gets the feeling that one is hard for him.
"Don't enter their space if you can help it and never without asking. Don't apologise or say thank you." Nami adds.
"Don't give any full names, in fact no names at all would be best." Brook chips in.
"Don't stare, don't follow them." Robin says as well.
Sanji waits but the list does not continue, evidently humans don't know all of the rules.
"We need to find them and kill them. Iron kills them." Zoro states and Franky grins.
"Oh good." The man says and Sanji stares in fascinated horror as the man peels the skin off of his hands to reveal gleaming metal underneath, Sanji sniffs and he can tell that a good deal of it is iron wrought into there.
"I'm going to go set up some spells to track them, some protection things now that I know what we're up against. Let me know if you see anything, okay? Don't wander off." Zoro warns him and crouches down to start pulling things out of his bag. Sanji sits down next to him and stretches his legs out.
"Love, I have nothing to fear in these woods. Half starved or not I can take care of myself out here." Sanji boasts and Zoro nods absently and shoves his wand between his teeth as he pulls out a pen. He starts to draw on his arm and after a few moments seems satisfied and replaces the pen in his bag.
"Good, I'd just hate to lose you." Zoro says quietly and rummages in his bag for something else. Sanji feels his face colouring and that intangible connection between them gains another thread of strength. His heart flutters and his breath catches at the physical sensation of Zoro's affection for him, he feels… unworthy.
Sanji sits up and wraps his arms around his knees. The rest of Zoro's friends are making their own wards and spells right on this woman's front lawn. Nami is even writing some on Luffy's knuckles. Sanji wonders what this would look like if he could see platonic love as he can this golden thread between him and Zoro, would Zoro be bound to these people still even though he is angry at them? He clearly still cares if they live or not.
"Come on." Zoro says, snapping Sanji out of his thoughts. He's standing before Sanji and holding his hand out to pull Sanji to his feet. Sanji takes his hand and Zoro pulls him up sharply, their bodies gently colliding. Sanji's hand rests on Zoro's hip and unease curls inside of his chest. Fae are dangerous and Zoro has first hand experience of just how risky they are, Sanji's instinct is to just get Zoro the hell away from here because he doesn't care about what's happening to the people here. But Zoro cares and so Sanji is left playing defence. He can't fail him, he just can't. But inside is the small gnawing fear that there might be too many fae for Sanji to fend off, or he might be more weakened than he thought, or something else could go wrong.
"Be careful." Sanji whispers and curls his arm around Zoro's waist.
"Hey! Cut that out." Usopp barks and Sanji glares at the selkie.
"Come on." Zoro says and moves ahead.
Luffy starts to lead their troupe through the village and Sanji can't help but note that Nami and Robin look notably less human than usual and far more ready for a fight. All of them have their wands at the ready except for Chopper who has transformed into a full deer and is scenting the air for any sign of the fair folk. Silver charms with small baubles of herbs are strung through his antlers and it looks almost beautiful in its own way.
They walk from door to door for a good hour but no one will answer to them. It becomes increasingly evident that all of the old houses and buildings in this small village are unusually protected by iron and the modified or newer ones without it are mostly empty. If Sanji had to guess he would say that the fae used to be here, either at the time of the village being founded or very early on and then for whatever reason they either left or slept. And then people started to forget, they abandoned their charms and their iron. So when the fae returned people began to vanish.
"Anything?" Zoro whispers to Sanji as they walk.
"This isn't really my thing. I can tell you that they're around but not close enough for me to help. You forget, my kind don't exactly have to hunt for their meals. It's not a skill I really have." Sanji whispers back.
"Yeah, we know what your skills are." Nami sneers and Sanji looks over his shoulder to glare at her yellow avian eyes. He freezes when he feels a thrum of magic run through him, making his marrow shudder in his bones.
"Wait." He says quickly but Luffy is already walking around the corner and right into a man who he knocks to the ground. The red haired man's bag of groceries goes flying, a bottle of milk shattering on the cobbles.
"Oh, crap. I'm s-" Luffy starts to say but Sanji lunges, grabbing Luffy and jamming his hand in Luffy's mouth. Don't apologize to the fair folk, it's as good as stating that you've wronged them and being in their debt is as bad as being in a deal with a demon. For fuck's sake, they just went over this.
"Don't say it." Sanji hisses in his ear.
The man on the floor is staring right at Sanji and he gets to his feet slowly, clearly unharmed. His eyes are inhumanly green, inhuman being the key word. Sanji stares back at him, unblinking. He carefully removes his hand from Luffy's mouth and shoves him behind and towards the rest of them.
Sanji doesn't dare break eye contact but he sees Zoro raise his sword and he quickly holds up his hand to halt him.
"The groceries disappeared." Robin whispers behind him but Sanji keeps staring.
"What are you?" The man finally asks in a quietly musical voice.
"More than you can handle." Sanji replies and the fae laughs, his eyes mirthless.
"A pack of hunters in my town, I hope people will miss you and more will come." the fae says slyly and Sanji feels the push of magic over his skin, the aura meant to terrify him and freeze him with fear. Behind him he hears the others react to it but from what he can tell Zoro is fine.
"You can't handle me, much less what would come looking for me in the unlikely event that you did manage to." Sanji sneers and the fae shakes his head.
Sanji reaches up and pulls his hat off, his horns showing and he lets his tail uncurl from under his sweater. The fae jerks back and hisses at him like a cat, a gesture Sanji returns only he knows that he sounds more intimidating.
"You should be below, filthy demon." The fae snarls, his features are becoming sharper and sharper as his pretty glamour drops.
"How about you leave this place and I don't drag you down there with me." He threatens.
"I…" the fae hesitates and finally his eyes break from Sanji's, his unnaturally green eyes scan the group and freeze when they hit Zoro. Sanji steps between them with a feral snarl.
"This green one, he's ours… oh you got away, didn't you? Escaped the hunt. How rare." the fae purrs, leaning around him to look at Zoro.
"Yeah I came back to even the score a little." Zoro says and points his sword at the fae.
"You're not going anywhere near him, I will kill you if you try." Sanji promises and the fae's eyes flick between Sanji and Zoro. The fae smiles and Sanji notes that he has too many teeth to be human.
"Oh, clever, clever, boy. You caught yourself a pet demon, didn't you? I must have you, I must." the bastard simpers.
"I am no one's pet and you are not getting him!" Sanji snaps and shoves the fae backwards with a push of his hand and a burst of fire from his palm. Not that it singes the man, just propels him ever so slightly.
Sanji watches as the fae's already sharp and less than human features warp even more with anger. He pulls his hand back to strike Sanji and the demon reaches for a nasty spell that will put this fucking fae's insides on his outsides only… only it doesn't catch. If Sanji was a car the key would be turning in the ignition with absolutely no life in the engine at all. He doesn't have the magic for this, he's too hungry.
He has a half second of 'well, fuck' before the fae's hand smacks into him and claws through the perma glamour that all incubi and succubi wear as skin. Sanji crashes into the ground with a bang and sees stars. He rolls onto his side and shakes his head, his horns are far weightier and bigger now and as he focuses his eyes he sees his long clawed hands pressed into the dirt and his fingers ashy at the ends.
"Fuck." Sanji groans and lava drips from his lips onto the ground with a sizzle.
He stands up awkwardly and sees that he is not in the village where he was before, he's on a pavestone guided path through a forest and it feels like summer here. Or more accurately, it feels like Summer, with a capital S. The fae appears before him, laughing smugly. Sanji hears the distant sound of hounds barking and shudders. Also out of nowhere comes Zoro and the rest of the semi humans, Sanji closes his eyes with a groan. Don't follow the fair folk, are these people incapable of following basic rules?
"Whoa." Luffy gasps, seeing Sanji. Zoro skids to a halt and stares.
"See what he really is now?" Nami says and Zoro nods. Sanji cringes at first but it takes a moment for him to realise that the look on Zoro's face is not negative but wondrous.
"I thought you sex demons were supposed to be pretty." the fae man giggles, circling Sanji.
"Hey, I'd still do me." Sanji replies lazily and spits a stream of lava at the fae who dodges. A tree catches fire and then transforms into a swarm of butterflies.
"I've never killed a demon before, it's going to be fun." he sighs wistfully.
"I've never eaten a fae before, I wonder how you taste." Sanji replies calmly. He rotates his wrist a little and draws a spell to himself, yeah he has less energy than he would like but now that he's in as true a form as he can be he's a hell of a lot more efficient.
"You think you can win against me? This is my turf!" he snaps angrily and Sanji smiles as he stamps a foot into the ground. Fire bursts out from his foot, scorching and splitting the earth below him. A little of hell spreading out from where he stands, the magically aided greenery around him shrivels and wilts with famine magic that he picked up from simply being around Zeff for so long.
"Your turf?" Sanji asks, looking around at the spreading hellscape, "It doesn't look that way."
The fae splutters in outrage at what Sanji has done with his ethereal place. Sanji just paces, waiting for him to attack again. No matter how much he's terraformed this part it is still the fae's land and there is far more magical shit that his opponent can pull here that Sanji doesn't have the energy to disarm. No, this is going to be a bloody and brutal fight.
He sees Luffy spinning a charm around his wrist, the letters glowing in the light and all of them are putting something in their ears. He watches Zoro shift his sword from hand to hand to guide something into his ears. Robin is the only one not putting something into her ears and Sanji smiles as he realises what is about to happen.
Robin opens her mouth and begins to sing. It's a strange haunting tune and it makes the pinfeather spines sticking out of Sanji's back prickle with it. The lure of it doesn't affect his mind like it does other species, he has the wrong kind of brain. But it's enough to distract the fae, even if it doesn't actually work on him fully.
Sanji barrels across the gap between them and kicks fire into the fae's ribs, slamming him into the ground. The fae bounces back upright and hisses out a curse of transmutation, turning Sanji's blood to stone. A poor choice, Sanji is from hell and heat is what he is made of at his core. He can have lava for blood, he already has lava for spit right now so it doesn't slow him down one bit.
Luffy's fist flies out of nowhere, clocking the fae right in the jaw and Sanji laughs in delight to see how it stretches from where Luffy is. That's some charm alright, he didn't know human bodies could warp like that. Sanji slams into the startled fae and gores him in the shoulder with his demonic horns, they pierce right through his skin and do a good deal of damage if the cursing is any guide. The fae claws at Sanji's ribs and the two of them spring apart once more, circling each other again and again.
He lunges in and kicks the fae again, but the fae fires off a slow spell hamstringing him in the most literal way. He grabs Sanji's leg with one hand and Sanji catches a look at the hex that is forming around his other hand, he's not intimately familiar with their language but he's pretty goddamn sure that the spell is going to lose him that leg.
Or at least it would have if it landed.
Zoro's sword slices through the air and it turns out that iron really does cut through fae like butter as Zoro does his level best to make sure that this motherfucker can only count up to five from now on. The fae screams in agony and drops Sanji's leg. Sanji pounces, bowling him onto his back. He reaches back his hand and plunges it straight into the fae's ribcage. His hand closes around the pulsing, throbbing heart and Sanji grips it and pulls. He rips the still beating thing from the man's chest and stares at is as he sees the life energy just oozing from it. Sanji opens his mouth and bites into the still twitching heart, he has never tasted anything better in his entire life.