Murder in Mathematics
Orochimaru: Has an idea
Detective Orochimaru frowned and pushed his chair back onto two legs. "Well, if you'll allow me saying so Jiraiya, this investigation is really going tits up, isn't it?"
Jiraiya, sitting across the table, choked on his sandwich, and upon swallowing it, burst into hearty guffaws. "T-tits, tits up!" he stammered out through his laughter, tears rolling out of his eyes.
"Not my normal level of erudition, I know, but the phrase was more than apt," Orochimaru smirked back, as his counterpart's laughter died down.
They sat together in Room 12, on the Teacher's Corridor, the location of their in-school break/work room.
The investigation thus far was going nowhere. Outside of their gut feelings there was simply no evidence suggesting that any of their suspects were the murderers. Forensic evidence had revealed nothing either. Kankuro had been bludgeoned by a chair. That was it. That was all the many hours of forensic evidence had revealed.
Through their interviews and own private analyses, the two detectives had ruled out a few people. Shikamaru Nara was one. He had never left the detention room, for certain. Kakashi Hatake was deemed the most likely to have done it, but even then, on a gut level, both detectives didn't buy it. He was simply the oldest, the strongest, and an individual who had left the room on multiple occasions the evening of the murder. Besides that, there was nothing on him. There was nothing on anybody.
"We need to look at it a new way," Orochimaru said, hand on his chin.
"We need a blooming miracle is what we need, Orochimaru," Jiraiya returned, only half in jest.
"Giving up isn't an option," Orochimaru said, glancing up.
"Who's talking about giving up?" Jiraiya returned, "All I'm saying is… well I'm saying I don't see a way we figure anything out unless somebody randomly breaks and confesses."
Orochimaru shook his head and then stood, moving to pace around the table. Jiraiya watched him with amusement as he circled.
"Let's review, shall we? Starting with Kakashi Hatake."
Jiraiya shrugged and nodded, allowing Orochimaru to speak on.
"Out of our suspects, besides Asuma Sarutobi, he is the one who could have most easily murdered the boy. He also left the detention room ten times. He tells us that he did this twice for the toilet, four times to visit Asuma and Kurenai Yuhi, once to fetch a new book as he had become bored of his current one, and thrice to have a walk. Asuma and Kurenai both confirm the fact he visited them four times, all the visits being at some time past quarter past six. If we assume on those times he only went straight to visit the two of them in Kurenai's geography room, and then returned straight back, that still means he had six other chances to kill Kankuro."
"Except," Jiraiya cut through, "He couldn't have the time that he went to fetch a new book, as all of the students attest to the fact that he took only five minutes, the time it takes for one to walk from Kakashi's room on the English corridor, to the staff room on this corridor, where he had left his book."
"Indeed," Orochimaru nodded, "Now think. Motive. Think."
Orochimaru looked at Jiraiya. Jiraiya looked back then shrugged with a bemused expression. Orochimaru kicked the chair nearby.
"Why would Kakashi Hatake leave his after-school detention to go murder a boy he didn't know on the mathematics corridor, then come back and see his detention through to the end, seemingly unperturbed and acting perfectly normal, as the students tell us? Why?"
"I don't know," Jiraiya answered.
"WHY, Jiraiya?"
"I don't know!" Jiraiya answered again, louder.
Orochimaru seemed to just stand there, seething with growing frustration for a while. He then turned on his heel and started pacing again. Calmed in an instance.
"Asuma and Kurenai."
Jiraiya grinned. "Yeah, let's talk about what they were doing."
"Staying after school to shag, Jiraiya, and we're not going through all the details of that again," Orochimaru said, eyebrow raised. Jiraiya looked visibly disappointed.
"So, they stay after-school, they talk, Kakashi visits them twice, they start to make sweet, sweet, love, Kakashi disturbs them but doesn't seem to know what they were up to, he leaves and they finish up, and then they… just go murder Kankuro. Cuz they're twisted, and it was needed to complete their sexual act in proper." Jiraiya said. He let his theory hang in the air.
Orochimaru shook his head. "No. Doesn't work."
There was a pause. Orochimaru began again. "Sasuke Uchiha."
"Now, here's a disturbed kid," Jiraiya said with a nod.
"Indeed. Perfect student, but a quiet and reserved boy. Strange but popular. Even stranger but certainly less popular after school gossip reveals that he's a murder suspect."
Jiraiya shifted on his chair, "Extremely unhelpful in interviews. Won't answer straight questions, gets angry over the littlest of things, looks visibly uncomfortable when you mention the murder."
"But he just doesn't seem to have had the capabilities, besides the one time he left the classroom for a toilet break. Everybody else tells us that he was but five minutes out of the classroom. He would have had to be speedy to run across school, smash Kankuro across the head with a chair, then run back."
"Orochimaru," Jiraiya said disapprovingly, in order to scold his fellow detective's lack of tact.
"Sorry," Orochimaru smirked. He carried on, looking put-out, "And the others… the Yamanaka girl. Young Sakura Haruno. The frightened Inuzuka boy. Naruto Uzumaki. That fat one. They either have had less capability time-wise to commit murder or simply seem even less likely judging by their behaviour."
Jiraiya sighed and slumped at the table. A bell rang for lunch somewhere in the corridor outside. The detectives shared glances.
"Buy me lunch?" Jiraiya tried.
Orochimaru smiled wryly and turned to leave, wagging his finger as he moved to the door, "This is the third time this week, Jiraiya. You'll be racking up a debt as large as Tsunade's if you're not careful."
"Ooh, don't make jokes like that in front of her, Oro. Not in her school!"
Orochimaru left the room smiling and made haste out of the corridor and in the direction of the cafeteria. He seemed to have a polar sort of magnetism to him. That is, children fled and the crowds spread as he walked through the corridor. He quite liked the power and respect. As he walked and considered what he wanted for lunch, a shout caught his attention.
"Orochimaru! Hey! Oro!"
Anko Mitarashi, PE teacher, caught up to him. Orochimaru smiled. "Hello, dear."
"Where you going then? Lunch, huh? Mind if I join?"
"Anko, it would be my pleasure."
They walked in silence for a while, then Anko spoke again.
"So, how's the investigation going boss man? Any big leads?"
Orochimaru cocked his head her way. They had reached the cafeteria and joined the back of the line to queue for food. There was a meeping sound. Orochimaru turned to see Kiba sitting on the closest possible table, along with Shikamaru and some other teenagers he didn't know. "Hello Kiba. Hello Shikamaru. Hello children."
The table all quietly said hello back, except for Kiba, who in fear ducked his head and meeped again.
Orochimaru grinned and turned back to Anko, behind him. "No updates on the investigation I'm afraid Anko. And of course, I couldn't tell you even if there were."
"I know that!" Anko said with a punch of Orochimaru's arm, "I was just having a punt is all. You never had a problem with telling me police stuff before, mind."
Orochimaru shook his head as the queue moved up, "I'm quite sure I don't know what you're talking about."
"No?" Anko grinned, "How about that time I was eighteen and you had me in the back of the car because you thought I had shoplifted some clothes shop an hour before?"
"You were in the back of my police car a lot, Anko," Orochimaru returned mischievously.
Anko smirked. "Except this time, you had nicked me unfairly. I hadn't done anything. I was just there in the shop at the time and was the most likely candidate. In truth, there were some kids in the store at the same time who most definitely did not look the part. Some posh twats. They had actually done the shoplifting, and you had ignored them. I only know all that because we listened to all the police updates about it from your radio. You let me listen in to the chase and arrest reports when you should have sent me packing hours before. It was quite exciting."
Orochimaru bristled. Anko looked at him in confusion, thinking she had perhaps done something wrong.
"What, am I not meant to talk about you breaking police protocol out loud or something?"
The detective turned, flashed her an uncertain smile, and then hurried out of the cafeteria.
She had given him an idea.
He arrived back in room twelve to find Jiraiya holding Kabuto in a headlock, reciting some kind of arrest tale to Izumo and Kotetsu.
"Jiraiya!" Orochimaru said as he pushed through the door.
Jiraiya jumped and Kabuto took the opportunity to weasel his way out of the lock.
"Detective Orochimaru," he said, out of breath, "Thank you for-"
"Not about you," Orochimaru said absentmindedly, and instead moved to push Jiraiya into his seat, before taking the seat opposite.
"What, what's happening?" Jiraiya questioned, glancing about in confusion.
"I have a new way of thinking about the investigation."
Jiraiya shared looks with Izumo and Kotetsu. "I have no idea what you mean by that, Oro," he said with a laugh.
"What we were discussing not fifteen minutes ago, you fool," Orochimaru hissed in annoyance, "I said we need a new way to look at it all, remember?"
Jiraiya nodded, though he was obviously lying.
"Obtuse," Orochimaru muttered to himself, but then spoke on, "Students that we haven't anticipated being there. That's who we need to look for."
Jiraiya stared blankly forward.
Orochimaru waited for a response.
Jiraiya narrowed his eyes and looked at the others.
"You don't get what I mean?" Orochimaru checked.
"No," Jiraiya said happily, sending a finger gun Orochimaru's way.
"Look at it this way," Orochimaru began, "So far we've been obsessed with the after-school detention people and Asuma and Kurenai, under the assumption that they were the only people in school at the time, besides Kankuro himself. Right?"
"Seems like a fair thing to do to me," Izumo said from his standing position behind Jiraiya.
"Completely fair," Orochimaru nodded, "But nothing is working. Not many of our suspects had much of an opportunity to murder, and none of them had motive. So what if we look to people who we haven't anticipated being there at the school that evening. What if our murderer was somebody who stayed after-school but failed to alert anybody to this fact?"
Jiraiya nodded, seeming to cotton onto Orochimaru's thinking. "You're saying what if a student hung around school a bit longer, in order to kill Kankuro?"
"I don't know if anybody waited about to do exactly that, but it's an avenue we need to look down."
There was a pause as the other detectives considered this.
"Considering our current crop of suspects aren't giving us much to work with, and our investigations have found no proof that somebody came from the outside to murder Kankuro, it seems like a solid idea," Kotetsu nodded slowly.
"But, if they didn't let anybody know that they were there in the after-school hours, how on earth do we find them?" Kabuto questioned.
This lowered the brewing excitement in the room. Orochimaru considered this, then spoke. "Worst comes to worst we just interview everybody in school, starting with staff first then moving down the school years. It's unlikely that any of the younger year students had anything to do with this, so it wouldn't take as long as one might have thought."
"Well, hey, tell you what," Jiraiya said with a click of his fingers, "We could find out who had after-school classes that night, as well. Kakashi's after-school detention certainly lasted longer than any other after-school activity, but there was surely some after-hours tutoring and stuff like that on, right? One of the students involved in one of those activities would have only had to have spent an extra hour or so in school in order to kill Kankuro."
"Good thinking, detective," Orochimaru nodded, "That will be a great place to start. I'll contact Tsunade right away and get a list of after-school activities that occurred that afternoon."
And so the plan was set. After lunch, Orochimaru visited Tsunade, explained their new theory, and was given a list of after-school activities that had occurred the night of the murder. One name and time stood out.
"Suigetsu Hozuki." Jiraiya read. "He had an afterschool detention himself with Zabuza Momochi, which ended at twenty past four. That's just under two before Kakashi's detention ended, and when we suspect round about the murder took place."
"All of the other afterschool activities ended at four," Orochimaru said, also peering down at the piece of paper. "And so, we have our new suspect."
"Erm. John F. Kennedy?"
Yamato frowned at Suigetsu, who was standing by his desk and had given the incorrect answer. "John F. Kennedy was most certainly not the Prime Minister of Great Britain in 1985," he informed.
Suigetsu nodded and smiled, "Well, I tried." And he sat down. Karin made a scoffing sound at him.
Yamato turned to Sakon, who stood a row ahead and to the side of Suigetsu, his competition in the little history pop-quiz game Yamato had devised for his students. "Erm… Umm… Err." Sakon was sweating profusely, panicked.
"Churchill. Winston Churchill!" His twin, seated next to him, hissed desperately.
Sakon glared down at Ukon, "It's not him. Shut up!"
Ukon pinched Sakon's thigh, hard, and they soon started fighting. Yamato sighed and the class quickly descended into chatter, as whenever this occurred – and it occurred often – they knew it granted them five to ten minutes of no teacher supervision. Suigetsu turned, eager to talk to Ino, but Shizune walked into the classroom, stopping the conversations immediately.
Yamato looked up from prying the twins apart, then jumped up. "Oh, Miss Shizune. Hi. I was just-"
"I need Suigetsu for a moment, is that okay?"
Suigetsu glanced up. He spared a look to Ino, who, to his eye, deliberately avoided it, and then raised himself slowly. "What's this about?" he asked, unable to veil his annoyance.
"The… The detectives want to see you." Shizune informed him.
Tension flooded the room.
Something was afoot.
"Oh, shit." Said Suigetsu.
"Lol." Said Karin.
A/N - Two years later and suddenly... an update! Yes, another differently paced chapter here. Not filled with humour either, but this chapter was always coming in order to move the plot along. Suigetsu joins the murder suspects!? And will anybody else? Well, find out two years from now when I update! Anyway, hope you enjoyed, please do leave me a review. They're always appreciated (and who knows, they could convince me to update sooner than later!).