[Winter Soldier and Mantis recreationally plan to ambush Santa if he tries to break into Widow's house. Natasha thinks it's too cute and ridiculous to stop.]
Natasha Romanoff had never really celebrated Christmas. Never had a reason to - but this year was different. This year she had a family. They were a highly dysfunctional family - but a family nonetheless. She planned on doing all those stupid things an adult with children hates doing, but somehow gets roped into doing anyway. The turkey was defrosting in the sink and the smell of baking was wafting throughout the apartment. Pretty soon, she'd drag Florence away to decorate cookies in an effort to keep her amused and distracted. She'd also planned for the inevitable and purchased a lot of red icing and aprons.
This was their first real Christmas - for all three. Mantis had never even heard of Christmas, or Santa until they'd explained it to her and even then, they'd probably mangled it so badly she only got the general gist of the idea. Bucky had last celebrated Christmas aged 16 or 17 with Steve in the 1940s and Natasha knew what it was - of course - and had been invited to Barton's house on more than one occasion to celebrate with Laura and the kids but had never become too involved in the frivolity. This Christmas Natasha was determined to give her family the full package at least once. She had made it absolutely clear that Florence should have as normal a childhood as they could give her, which meant celebrating Christmas.
She was dusting her hands of flour and walking past the kitchen door when she caught Bucky's voice from the living room. 'We need more tripwires.'
'But the hardware shop is shut.' Florence whined. 'It's Christmas Eve - there's not a whole lot of time.'
She'd asked Bucky to keep her entertained until they were ready but the tripwire comment had caught her off-guard. What exactly were they doing? When Natasha had asked him, she'd had visions of board games and charades but tripwires?
She peeked her head out of the kitchen for the first time in an hour to chaos in her sparsely furnished living room. Wires had been strung from every conceivable point.
'What the hell?!'
Both turned to look at her guilt and surprise on their faces. After spending all morning baking in a hot kitchen, Natasha was seriously questioning whether or not this was worth the explanation - at least until she spotted the firework pointed at the fireplace.
'What,' She demanded coldly. 'Is going on?'
Winter Soldier was, obviously, the chosen sacrifice. 'We're setting a trap for Santa?' He replied warily. Florence nodded her head.
'A trap. For Santa.' Natasha deadpanned as she glanced around and groaned 'I'm not going to have any furniture left at this rate. Whose idea was it?'
'It seems dangerous that people would knowingly allow an intruder into their homes on the premise that he deliver presents.' Florence replied. 'And I have heard that he punishes those who are naughty. There is an awful lot of nasty things that can be hidden in an unassuming box with a bow on it.' She added darkly.
They hadn't explained it properly at all.
If Natasha had been any kind of normal parent she would have laughed and hugged her daughter and told her not to be so worried about whether she was nice or naughty. However, Natasha was not a normal parent and Florence was not your normal child. 'So you decided ... to set a trap.'
'Yes.' The child replied sullenly.
'And what were you going to do when you'd caught this intruder? Tie him to one of my dining chairs on the roof - again?' She didn't miss the way Bucky winced. 'I've only got three left.'
'We were going to interrogate him on the nature of naughty and nice - and torture the location of the presents out of him.' Florence replied to another wince from her father.
'I see.' Natasha mused with a blank look on her face. She knew Bucky and Florence both feared that blank look. Neither could read her reactions or, indeed, what she was thinking/plotting when wearing it and not being able to read someone made an assassin nervous. 'Well the cookies are done. Do you want to start decorating?'
'But we haven't finished setting the trap!' Florence whined.
'I'm sure this is more than sufficient.' Natasha replied. 'Get an apron on, please.' She warned as the little red-head sulked past her and into the kitchen. 'Red icing can stain.'
'Natalia - I -' Bucky began in some kind of belated defense.
'I'm not the one who has to slog through all that to put the presents under the tree, James. Without setting it off.' She replied with a brutal little smile.
Bucky's face froze. 'Shit.' He agreed.
She whispered 'Good luck with that.' as she turned back to the kitchen and left him staring forlornly at the mess of wires he'd have to maneuver a whole bag of presents through.
She could sit back with a glass of wine later and watch him attempt Mission Impossible. Who said Christmas wasn't fun?
A/N: Next Christmas, I may actually put a concluding chapter to this one. But yes, family dysfunction rears it's head again and this time they manage to mangle Christmas. Lets just hope Bucky doesn't eat the mince pie that his loving daughter has laced with sedatives (the thought that Mantis had not done something to the food for Santa and Rudolph is absurd. It's absolutely been tampered with) and doesn't set off the firework.
Merry Christmas! See you guys in the new year!
Guest: I'm glad you're enjoying them! Bucky and Natasha getting married would be fun to explore. I'll definitely add it to the new year list!