Recap: Hiei stormed the auction and, along with Kuwabara, an unsure Yusuke and an unwilling Kurama, he set free the ice maidens. The group were then forced to steal a military vehicle in order to make their escape: but unfortunately Hiei was having a few problems remembering how to drive.

Chapter 12: Politics and Polonecks

"You're driving us straight into the fence!" Yusuke yelled.

"Change gear and steer it over this way!" Kuwabara yelled.

"Are you deliberately doing this badly?" Yusuke asked.

"Could you do any better?" Hiei snapped.

"No, he's never driven before!" Kuwabara answered.

"Yeah, and I bet even I wouldn't be this bad!" Yusuke said.

Yusuke and Kuwabara both cried out in alarm as they were sent flying across the cabin. Apparently mastering gear usage was not Hiei's only short-coming as a driver, as he began making sharp and exaggerated turns of the steering wheel.

"We're going to die before we even get back to Puu," Kuwabara groaned.

Yusuke grabbed the back of Hiei's chair and pulled himself to his feet. He looked out the windscreen and saw that they were at least heading towards the open gate.

"The middle pedal is the brake, by the way," he said sarcastically.

"I knew that!" Hiei snapped back.

Yusuke moved over to the navigation screen, pressing a few buttons experimentally.

"Maybe this thing can help us find a safe place to hide once we get out of the city," he said.

"Would it kill you to change gears, Hiei?" Kuwabara asked as he dragged himself up again.

"Yeah, and quit steering so hard that we fall on our asses!" Yusuke added, grabbing at the console to steady himself as Hiei turned the vehicle sharply again. "I know you think it's funny hurting Kuwabara, but you're hurting me too, tiny!"

"And use the clutch when your changing gears!" Kuwabara yelled as Hiei began crunching the gears again.

"How many times do I need to do that, anyway?" Hiei snapped, stamping on the clutch and filling the cabin with the sound of the engine revving freely.

"As many times as you need to!" Kuwabara replied.

"I knew that!"

Hiei finally managed to get the vehicle into second gear, returning his hand to the steering wheel and tightening his grip as he tried to aim through the gate.

"Right, as soon as we get Puu, we get the hell out of this city, right?" Yusuke asked.

"Uh, right," Kuwabara replied, leaning his head to the right.

"We need to figure out which way we go after that though," Yusuke said.

"Right," Kuwabara said, leaning his entire body to the right and wincing slightly.

"What are you – ah!"

Yusuke and Kuwabara were once more left staggering about as the left side of the vehicle hit one of the gateposts, the deafening shriek of metal scraping against metal radiating along the whole left side of the vehicle. Once they had finally passed through the gate and steadied onto the road ahead, Yusuke turned to Kuwabara, arching his eyebrows sarcastically.

"This way we'll be able to find it real easy when we park at the grocery store," he said flatly. "It'll be the one with the enormous dent all along one side."

Kuwabara groaned and rolled his eyes.

"That's assuming we even make it back to the market in one piece," Yusuke added. "We turned left here!" he snapped at Hiei.

Hiei stamped at the brake and began steering left.

"We turned left on the way here, turn right to take us back!" Yusuke cried.

Hiei quickly spun the steering wheel to the right, mounting the sidewalk and flattening a street sign but managing to make it onto the correct road. The vehicle chugged along sluggishly in second gear as Hiei merely pressed the accelerator harder in an attempt to pick up speed again.

"Hiei, when this is all over, we fight," Yusuke growled. "No holds barred."

Hiei cast him a dark glance before shifting up another gear, managing the action more smoothly than his previous attempts. Kuwabara sighed and moved over to one side of the cabin, sitting down with his back against the door. Yusuke put one hand on the back of Hiei's chair and the other on the navigation unit, leaning forwards over Hiei and watching out the window ahead.

"Do you need directions to get back to the auction?" he asked.

"That would be nice," Hiei replied, his eyes fixed onto the road ahead.

"I'm so glad I got cured of the virus before it made me as sick as you," Yusuke grumbled.

Hiei stole several nervous glances at him, his eyebrows knitted together in curious confusion.

"You-you were cured?" he asked.

"That's what Koenma told me," Yusuke replied. "He said only healing magic stops the virus turning deadly. Lucky for me, Kuwabara and Kurama we had Botan to help us out."

"What?" Hiei echoed.

"See Hiei, you always act like you're too good to be friends with Botan, but she can be useful too," Kuwabara said.

"What?" Hiei said, his head snapping around to look down at Kuwabara.

"Keep your damn eyes on the road!" Yusuke yelped.

Hiei turned back again, but his jaw was clenched tightly and his eyes thinned angrily. Yusuke continued directing him towards the market square and Hiei duly followed the instructions he was given, though he lost none of the tension in his jaw and shoulders as he did so. The remainder of the journey passed without too many mishaps until Hiei braked far too abruptly as they turned onto the road leading onto the market square, which was still crammed with bodies. Yusuke and Kuwabara cursed and complained respectively at Hiei's unnecessarily abrupt response, but Hiei ignored them, struggling a little with changing to a lower gear before slowly continuing.

Yusuke and Kuwabara moved to stand on either side of Hiei, leaning towards the windscreen to watch the crowds reluctantly part to allow their vehicle passage. The desperate sick around them looked quite pitiful, and Yusuke again found himself wondering how right Kurama had been about leaving the ice maidens behind to cure the sick, by any means necessary. As they neared the end of the road, Puu came into their line of vision, still hovering barely out of grabbing reach of the crowds. He was labouring to keep himself airborne, and the relief was almost obvious in his eyes as he noticed their approach. He opened his mouth, presumably calling out – though the sound did not reach Yusuke, Kuwabara and Hiei inside the vehicle – and started towards them.

"As soon as you hear him land, back up," Yusuke said to Hiei.

Hiei nodded, bringing the vehicle to a halt just inside the limits of the square to allow the spirit beast room to land. Kuwabara straightened away from the windscreen as the hoards turned to follow Puu's movements. Hiei looked down at the gearstick curiously as Puu's shadow fell over them. A moment later Puu's feet hit the roof with a resounding thud and a series of clattering sounds as his claws gripped on, and almost immediately afterwards desperate demons began scrambling up over the wheel-arches towards the windscreen.

"Get us out of here, Hiei!" Yusuke yelled desperately.

"I can't just drive into all those people," Hiei said, his tone far too calm for Yusuke's liking.

"Put it in reverse and put your foot down, Hiei!" Kuwabara cried.

"Reverse…?" Hiei muttered, peering over at the gearstick.

"R!" Kuwabara said. "R is for reverse! Put it into R!"

"I thought R was for Retard…" Yusuke muttered.

"So that makes the vehicle move backwards?" Hiei asked. "But I can't see what's behind the vehicle, I might hurt someone."

"And we might die if you don't get us out of here!" Kuwabara yelled.

Hiei sighed and moved the gearstick into reverse before stamping down onto the accelerator. Yusuke and Kuwabara barely missed smacking their heads against the windscreen as the vehicle shot backwards.

"Turn at the next crossroads and get us out of the city!" Yusuke said.

Hiei immediately spun the steering wheel, turning the vehicle sharply and crashing the rear-end into the corner of one of the jagged buildings.

"I hate you so much…" Kuwabara muttered as Hiei glanced at him.

"Just get us out of here," Yusuke said as Hiei glanced at him.

Hiei nodded and shifted gear again, driving across the street and mounting the opposite kerb, pulling desperately on the steering wheel in at attempt to turn fully around. The right side of the vehicle clipped the corner of another building, and again the sickening scraping of metal against metal filled the cabin.

"Hiei's a closet motor racing fan," Yusuke said to Kuwabara once the noise had stopped. "He just had to add racing stripes to both sides of this thing."

Kuwabara chuckled but Hiei merely looked confused.

"It's a human thing," Yusuke said, patting him on the shoulder.

"I don't understand," Hiei quietly replied.

"I know you don't," Yusuke said with a smile. "That's part of what makes it so funny."

To Yusuke's surprise, Hiei simply nodded and turned his full attention back to the road ahead. Their view of the city had became slightly tinted as Puu had apparently extended his protective barrier to enshroud not just himself but also the entire vehicle beneath him: which was just as well, as several of the less sick and more agile demons from the auction were running alongside them trying to find a way to board and take back the ice maidens.

"Go back and see if Kurama needs help," Yusuke said.

"Why me?" Kuwabara asked.

"Because that little girl thought you were a woman," Yusuke replied. "They're more likely to trust you than me."

"What?" Hiei grunted.

"That little girl you were babysitting thinks everyone is really a woman," Yusuke said. "Except me. She knows I'm a man. Must be my manly pheromones."

"Do you know what pheromones actually are?" Hiei asked.

"Yeah, and I bet I've got more of the little bastards than you do, Hime!"

"I think you're confusing pheromones with bacteria."

Yusuke twitched in irritation.

"Go check on Kurama, Kuwabara!" he barked, pointing towards the back of the cabin.

As Kuwabara left in search of Kurama, Yusuke turned to Hiei and began pulling faces and making offensive hand gestures behind his back.

"I can see you," Hiei said after a short silence.

"I guess it pays sometimes to have an extra eye…" Yusuke muttered.

"I can see your reflection in the glass," Hiei pointed out, nodding at the windscreen. "And I could hear you gesticulating."

"What?" Yusuke yelped.

"He said gesticulate, Yusuke," Kurama said as he joined them in the cabin.

"Right," Yusuke said. "But is that any better than him saying masturba–"

"Yes, it's not in the least offensive," Kurama cut him off.

"Okay… So did you get those chicks off the roof?"

"Eventually, yes. They won't come down out of the upper deck, but I've closed the hatch and they're sealed in here with us now."

"Do you think they'd like some tea?" Kuwabara asked.

"Great idea, Kuwabara," Yusuke groaned. "I'll just boil the kettle and prepare the teapot… Idiot!"

"Ice maidens don't drink tea."

Yusuke, Kurama and Kuwabara all turned to Hiei curiously.

"Shut-up, Hiei!" Kuwabara said. "Yukina makes tea every time I visit her!"

"Have you ever seen her drink any herself?" Hiei asked.

Kurama and Yusuke turned to Kuwabara expectantly, finding him looking almost painfully pensive.

"Yes!" he suddenly blurted out, making both Kurama and Yusuke flinch. "She always makes a bowl for herself too!"

"But does she drink it?" Hiei asked.

"Well, that's a stupid question!" Kuwabara snorted. "Why would she make it if she wasn't going to drink it!"

"Maybe she just did it so you wouldn't feel stupid being the only one drinking tea," Yusuke suggested.

"Why would she do that?" Kuwabara asked.

"Maybe she was too frightened to disagree with you," Kurama said. "Perhaps she was worried you would be offended or feel that you could no longer drink tea in her presence if she expressed her own dislike for it."

"That can't be true!" Kuwabara said.

"Of course it can't," Hiei said. "After all, wouldn't that require some degree of sensitivity on Yukina's part? And isn't she just another emotionally retarded ice maiden?"

"Hey, don't talk about Yukina that way!" Kuwabara snapped.

"I suppose it's not really a problem," Hiei continued. "Since Kuwabara has twice the emotional capacity of an average man, surely he can compensate for Yukina's shortcomings."

"I'll have you know I consider my high capacity for emotion to be a strength, not a weakness!"

"Huh."

Kuwabara scrunched up his face and took a step forwards towards Hiei, but Kurama put out a hand to stop him.

"Today has been a very difficult day for Hiei, and he is still sick, remember?" he said quietly when Kuwabara turned questioning eyes to him.

Kuwabara made a non-committal grunt and stepped back, and, taking this as his agreement not to escalate his bickering with Hiei into a full-blown battle, Kurama approached the console, stopping beside where Hiei was sat.

"I'll check on here to see if there are any underground hive networks we could escape through once we leave the city," he said, pushing some buttons on the navigation device.

Hiei glanced at him briefly before doing a distinct double-take and inadvertently jerking the steering wheel slightly, causing the others to stagger about and Yusuke to curse again.

"Try to keep us on a steady course for now," Kurama advised.

"What happened to you?" Hiei asked, his eyes enormous. "I don't remember you getting hurt so during our struggle back at that auction."

"I fell off the ladder when I was trying to reach the hatch," Kurama quietly replied. "Twice."

"Oh no!" Hiei said. "But why?"

Kurama grabbed the steering wheel and held it in place as Hiei almost jerked it around again, his hands instinctively following his eyes every time he stole a worried glance up at Kurama.

"I think we experienced a few uneven stops, starts and turns," he said patiently. "But if you can make sure that doesn't happen again, hopefully no-one else will get hurt."

"It's my fault?" Hiei yelped.

"It's fine, just concentrate on getting us out of the city," Kurama assured him.

"But I had no idea, I would never have said all those things about…"

Hiei slumped forwards slightly, but as he kept the vehicle moving, Kurama did not question him any further, instead concentrating on checking the navigation computer for any nearby entries into the underground network. The underground had once been a popular way for demons to traverse long distances in demon world – mostly because it avoided the issues of passing between any of the three territories demon world was once divided into – but even before Kurama had left demon world and taken up residence in living world as Shuichi Minamino the underground had become less frequently used. It was an unofficial network of tunnels dug many centuries before by a tribe of demons who lived in a hive network beneath the ground, exempt from the rule of Raizen, Yomi or Mukuro, and they had originally opened up their tunnels and charged others to pass through; but more powerful demons had quickly battled them into extinction, turning their lair into a hollow web of roads. But, without the original residents there to maintain the network, it had fallen into disrepair over time, some tunnels collapsing and others flooding. Going back into the underground network after so long was a gamble, but Kurama knew that the link from Illyria to the capital cities of Raizen's territory and Yomi's territory had been reasonably well looked after by the thieves like himself who had taken an interest in keeping it open.

After several failed attempts, Kurama eventually managed to find the dark spot on the map that indicated the hollow in the ground. It was a double-edged sword: going underground meant the demons currently running after them would stop following out of fear, but it also meant potentially meeting many more desperate souls who were far stronger and more violent. He looked down at Hiei, finding him still looking weakened, fretful and exhausted.

"We're going to have to go underground," he said, touching a hand to the back of Hiei's chair.

Hiei peered down at the gearstick.

"Which one does that?" he asked.

"What?" Kurama echoed.

"Well, R makes the vehicle move backwards, and one, two, three and four make it move forwards," Hiei replied. "Does five make it dig underground?"

The look of genuine curiosity on Hiei's face almost made Kurama think that he might not be as safe from the virus as he had thought, because he seemed to be going mad: surely he had just misheard Hiei?

"Underground," he said carefully, tapping at the screen of the navigation device. "We have to get to the entrance of the underground network, and take it to Gandara."

"Underground network?" Hiei asked.

"You… Never used the underground network?"

"No. I didn't know there was one."

Kurama began to try to remember exactly when the underground had started having structural issues, Hiei's comment about him being very old suddenly feeling sickeningly true as he realised that, by the time Hiei had been born, the majority of minor thieves – like those who raised Hiei – had probably already stopped using it.

"I suppose it was a little before your time," he eventually concluded.

As he looked down at Hiei again, he saw him looking a little flustered and anxious.

"It's an underground road system, basically," Kurama continued.

"Will we be safe there?" Hiei asked.

"In this vehicle, with Puu creating a barrier around us, we probably ought to be," Kurama replied.

"You don't sound very sure," Hiei pointed out.

"I'm not."

Hiei frowned up at him briefly.

"But we've started this now, there's no going back," Kurama said.

Hiei nodded, and they continued on in silence.

Yusuke, Kuwabara and Kurama all stumbled slightly as the vehicle halted a little abruptly. Hiei was staring out of the window in a state of wonder, and, as the others followed the direction he was looking, they all shortly took on a look of amazement themselves.

"Well I guess going undercover isn't gonna be an issue down here," Yusuke said, his eyes roaming over the seven other vehicles identical to their own already parked along one wall of the cave.

"This was what I had hoped for," Kurama said. "Move us in a little closer Hiei, then turn the engine off."

Hiei drove forwards a little further before stopping directly behind one of the other military vehicles. He turned off the engine as Kurama had asked, removing the key from the ignition.

"We should gather supplies before we go any further," Kurama advised. "And unfortunately I'm the only one who knows where to go and how to deal with the people down here."

"Why is that unfortunate?" Kuwabara asked, his lip curling as he watched a fanged lizard demon chase a cat demon past the side of the vehicle.

"Because the ice maidens trust me the most, and one of us will have to stay here," Kurama replied. "Puu's too big to fit inside this vehicle, and he is making us a little conspicuous, not to mention the fact that those women we have on board are doubly valuable down here, both as a cure to sell off to the sick and as jewel producers."

"I could stay behind," Hiei offered.

"No," Kurama said.

"You didn't even hesitate," Hiei said. "Don't you trust me?"

"The ice maidens fear you the most, and I want to keep you where I can see you."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't mind staying behind," Kuwabara offered. "It's dark and creepy out there, and unlike Urameshi and Hiei, I know the right way to treat a lady."

"Alright, thank you," Kurama said. "Yusuke, Hiei, stay close to me, try not to talk to anyone and try not to start any fights."

"Don't worry about me," Yusuke replied. "It's Hime you need to worry about. If he sees something sparkly, we might lose him."

"Leave the key with Kuwabara," Kurama said to Hiei.

Hiei, who was still glowering at Yusuke for his last remark, thrust his hand out towards Kuwabara, who cautiously plucked the key from between his fingers. Kurama opened the door, allowing Yusuke and Hiei to leave ahead of him.

"Don't harry the ice maidens while we're gone," he said to Kuwabara.

"Okay…" Kuwabara said slowly. "I won't Fred them either…"

Kurama waited for Kuwabara to give some indication that he had intended his last remark as a joke, and when he did not, Kurama stepped out of the door, positioning his feet onto the top rung of the ladder.

"Don't badger the ice maidens," he said.

"…There are badgers in demon world?" Kuwabara asked.

"Don't nettle the ice maidens," Kurama tried.

"Plants are your thing Kurama, not mine," Kuwabara replied.

"Don't needle the ice maidens."

"Like syringes or knitting needles?"

Kurama sighed.

"Don't pester them," he said.

"I'm not gonna pester them!" Kuwabara complained.

"Alright then," Kurama said, starting down the ladder.

"You know, if you just wanted to tell me to leave them alone, why didn't you just say so in the first place?" Kuwabara asked, leaning out of the doorway to watch Kurama climb down. "What was the point of all that stuff about Harry, badgers, nettles and needles?"

"Get back inside and shut the door!" Yusuke shouted up to him.

Kuwabara grumbled an insult against Yusuke and slammed the door shut, and Yusuke yelled his retort at the closed door.

"He can't hear you, you know," Hiei said.

"He can lip-read!" Yusuke replied, pointing at Kuwabara's face by the side windscreen.

"Let's just keep moving," Kurama suggested.

He began walking away from the vehicle and Hiei fell into step at his side, with Yusuke hurrying after them a few more mimed insults later. The area they had parked in was a large, almost circular opening they had reached after driving along a long tunnel that had been littered with rubble in a few places, making it barely passable for even one vehicle. Puu had flattened himself to the roof of the vehicle and he was still there, his beak tucked under one wing feigning sleep, despite his eyes being open and watching Yusuke, Kurama and Hiei as they moved away from him. As they walked, Yusuke and Hiei looked about themselves curiously at the ragged rocky walls, the other vehicles parked around the periphery of the cave, any particularly bizarre passers-by and the various small stalls in the middle of the opening, only stopping their actions when Kurama quietly warned them against making it too obvious that they had never been there before.

Kurama led them to a produce stall, where he began bargaining with the vendor, whilst Yusuke set about arranging various fruits and vegetables into rude positions, nudging Hiei and pointing at his efforts every so often, earning himself a indifferent look every time.

"Are you alright Sir?" a young woman asked as she began refilling a basket of oranges.

"I'm fine thank you," Kurama answered her.

"You look like you've been in a fight," she commented, her eyes running over the bruise forming on one side of his face, his cut lip and his burnt palms. "Are you running away from something?"

"I appreciate your concern, but it's unnecessary," Kurama replied.

"Yeah, you think he looks bad?" Yusuke cut in. "You should see how bad the other guy looks."

The girl's eyes started to sparkle and she smiled up at Kurama in a way that made Hiei's lip curl in disgust.

"You don't look like a powerful fighter," she said. "Are you a powerful fighter? I like powerful fighters."

"Excuse us," Kurama said, nodding politely.

He quickly picked up the bags and handed them to Yusuke before paying the vendor and ushering Yusuke and Hiei away from the stand again.

"I think you scored," Yusuke whispered loudly as they walked on.

"Nobody who works down here is to be trusted," Kurama darkly replied.

"She was pretty hot," Yusuke said.

"She's also deceptively dangerous and probably a lure," Kurama said.

"What's a lure?" Hiei asked.

"A seemingly innocent, pretty young female who joins a gang of powerful demons, who use her solely to draw in gullible fools they can rob," Kurama replied.

"How many times has that happened to you?" Yusuke asked.

"What makes you think I've ever fallen for the lure of one of those girls before?" Kurama asked.

Yusuke shrugged.

"Because if you hadn't told me what she was, I probably would have fallen for her tricks," he said.

"Kurama's too sensible to fall for something like that," Hiei said.

"Twice," Kurama said.

"Ha, I knew it!" Yusuke said.

"The first time it was through genuine ignorance that girls like her existed, and the second time was because I thought she was genuinely a lost innocent who had been taken prisoner."

Yusuke laughed until he noticed something, his cheer quickly fading.

"Hey!" he said. "Why am I the only one carrying any bags?"

"I need to keep my hands free to pay the vendors," Kurama replied. "And Hiei will be carrying the bags we get from the next stop we make."

"We already have food, what else do we need?" Hiei asked.

"Water," Yusuke suggested.

"No, there is a reserve of drinking water onboard the vehicle already," Kurama replied. "We need clothes."

Yusuke and Hiei both stopped walking, each looking as surprised and confused as the other. Kurama continued on without them, approaching a row of three stands selling various items of everyday casual clothing. Yusuke glanced over at the nearby stands selling armour and Hiei eyed the stands selling battle dress; but Kurama had willingly walked beyond both, and chosen the stands selling clothing more suited to relaxing at home than working out or fighting. Kurama walked up and down the length of the three stands before turning around and approaching Yusuke.

"Call Botan," he said.

"Why?" Hiei immediately asked.

"I need some advice, and I want to make sure she has returned to spirit world, where she will be safe from anyone hunting her for her healing powers," Kurama replied.

Hiei nodded, though he still looked a little sceptical. Yusuke fished his communicator out of his pocket with his free hand and passed it to Kurama, who proceeded to call Botan. There was a short delay before she answered, her confusion at seeing Kurama's face greet her obvious in her tone when she did.

"I can see you're back in spirit world, which is a relief," Kurama said.

"Yes, Lord Koenma made me return here, and he's confining all ferry girls to their rooms," Botan replied. "It's incredibly boring, we're stuck up here with ogres patrolling the doors to keep us in. I hope you boys fix that problem in demon world soon, I can't stand being locked up like this!"

"Well, that's a little bit of a grey area, Botan," Kurama replied, glancing at Hiei.

"I thought the ice maidens were curing people?" she responded.

"No," Hiei said. "They were taken against their will and forced to use their powers! The conditions they're being held in are far worse than yours: I'm sure they would be glad to be restricted only to their own homes rather than being contained in cages too small for them to lie down in!"

Kurama narrowed his eyes at Hiei, but Hiei maintained his stern and determined look.

"Don't they want to help the sick?" Botan asked.

"No, they just want to return to their village," Kurama answered her.

"Which is their right," Hiei pointed out.

"But they can't let everyone else fall ill and die," Botan said. "And if they don't help the sick, we ferry girls will never be safe outside of spirit world! Don't they realise what they're doing? How are we supposed to continue our duties in living world when we can't even leave our rooms?"

"Don't worry Botan, we're going to convince them to help," Kurama assured her. "I promise you'll be free to fly around the skies of living world before you know it."

"You're siding with those who enslaved my people just because doing so means making Botan happy?" Hiei asked quietly.

"This is a far more complicated matter than that and you know it," Kurama quietly answered him.

"Oh dear, it's become quite a political conundrum between our two worlds, hasn't it?" Botan said.

"Yes, but the most important thing for now is that you are safe, Botan," Kurama said.

"Yes, that's absolutely the most important thing," Hiei growled. "Never mind that ninety percent of the population of the ice village are being sold like bags of corn…"

Hiei turned his head from the others, his jaw squared again and his eyes thinned in displeasure.

"You were right Botan," Kurama said. "It is becoming quite the political conundrum. But there is another reason I called you. You are an expert of disguise, and I need your advice."

"What?" Hiei muttered, turning back to look directly at Kurama.

"I need to visually disguise a group of women," Kurama continued. "On sight alone, their clothing gives away their identities, and I need to change that. I don't want to dress them in anything that suggests they are fighters, because obviously they are not, but I do need them to look as inconspicuous as possible. Do you have any suggestions?"

"…You want to dress up a group of women…?" Botan asked.

"It's a long story," Kurama replied, smiling slightly. "I'll explain it to you when I return to living world. Perhaps over dinner?"

"Ask her on a date some other time, fox boy," Yusuke complained. "These bags are starting to rip, so let's make this quick."

"Okay, well, I suppose you want to dress them in neutral colours?" Botan suggested.

"Right…" Kurama said. "What does that mean, exactly?"

"It means neutral colours," Hiei snapped. "Like grey, beige and brown."

"Figures you would know, Hime," Yusuke muttered under his breath.

"Alright, we'll try that," Kurama said to Botan.

"And if you're trying to blend in, you should probably choose something that's currently fashionable," she added. "What's currently fashionable in demon world?"

Kurama glanced at Hiei and Yusuke, who both shrugged.

"We can ask the merchants here," Kurama concluded. "Thank you Botan. And please don't force your way out. I know it's hard to be confined as you are, but Koenma had your best interests at heart when he gave the order to have you contained in your quarters."

"But it's not fair," Botan moaned. "You boys get to go out there and have all the fun, and I get left behind without even knowing what's really going on!"

"I'll fill you in when we get back, I promise," Kurama assured her. "Good bye, Botan."

"Bye Kurama."

Kurama closed the communicator and found Hiei glaring at him and Yusuke smirking at him.

"I bet you'll "fill her in" when we get back!" Yusuke said, his smirk turning into a grin.

"Don't be puerile," Hiei scolded him.

"What's your problem, Hime?" Yusuke asked him. "Are you jealous?"

Hiei glanced at Kurama, his anger vanishing for long enough to show a genuinely conflicted and slightly guilty expression on his face before he once more managed to hide his true feelings behind an angered scowl.

"Huh, you're an idiot!" he said to Yusuke.

"Let's continue, shall we?" Kurama suggested, hoping to prevent an argument breaking out. "Botan said we need neutral colours."

"For what?" Hiei asked, hurrying after Kurama as he approached the clothing stalls again. "To dress up those women in outfits they don't understand or feel safe in?"

"Nobody in demon world wears hand-stitched silk kimonos and crystal hairpins," Kurama pointed out. "On sight alone, they stand out. If we disguise them visually, then they can move freely about the vehicle without fear of being spotted through the front windscreen by someone who would do them harm."

Hiei twitched but said nothing, which Kurama took to mean that the fire demon accepted his reasoning.

"Botan said we should pick neutral colours, so let's just find four medium-sized outfits in neutral colours, one small and something that looks like it would fit the little girl," Kurama said to Yusuke and Hiei.

"And you trust Botan's opinion explicitly?" Hiei asked, picking up a woolly grey sweater.

"Of course," Kurama replied. "She's very sensible about these matters."

"Not so sensible about political matters though…" Hiei muttered.

"She's not an idiot, no matter what you might think," Kurama said sternly.

"I dunno Kurama," Yusuke said, poking experimentally at a pointed felt hat. "Botan can be a bit of a ditz at times."

"Exactly," Hiei said, picking up another sweater and holding it up against himself. "Can we trust the opinion of a woman who probably doesn't even know her politics from her polonecks?" he asked Kurama.

"Yes we can trust her," Kurama replied, snatching the sweater from Hiei.

Hiei turned to Yusuke who shrugged indifferently.

"Buying the clothes is fine, but getting those women to wear them is whole different ball game," he said.

"Yes, exactly!" Hiei said, nodding in agreement.

"We'll take these," Kurama said to the salesman, pointing to the pile of clothing he had gathered.

"And this," Yusuke added, throwing over the pointed hat.

"What for?" Hiei asked, eying it over incredulously.

"Fun?" Yusuke replied.

"Fun?" Hiei echoed.

"Yeah, it's that word that describes what happy people like to do with their spare time."

"I know how to have fun."

"Sure you do. Except, for most people, fun is messing around and relaxing and playing games. Not, you know, cutting things open to see how much they bleed, practising witty one-liners in front of a mirror and using a rack to try to grow a few damn inches."

"I rarely use a mirror for anything."

"No shit."

Yusuke grinned as Hiei glowered at him and Kurama collected up the bags of clothing he had just bought.

"Here," he said, passing the bags to Hiei.

Hiei took the first few, but hesitated when Kurama handed him the remaining bags too.

"I would carry some myself, but someone burnt the skin off the palms of my hands, and they're still a little sensitive," Kurama replied, holding up one hand to indicate his point.

Hiei's eyes widened slightly at the sight of the wounds on Kurama's palm, and he numbly accepted the remainder of the bags. All three started back towards their vehicle in silence until Kurama had to again quietly remind Yusuke and Hiei to stop looking around as though they were amazed by their surroundings – which of course they were, but by making their true feelings known, they highlighted themselves as newcomers and put themselves at risk of being targeted by muggers.

Once they arrived back at the vehicle Kurama climbed up to the door first, waving at Kuwabara who was standing by the window to let him know he was about to open the door. Yusuke moved his bags into one hand and followed after Kurama with Hiei climbing up last, struggling to keep his balance as he hoisted the bags up with him. Once he had eventually made it through the door he gladly dropped the bags and pressed the back of one hand to his hairline to soak up the sweat gathering there.

"What's up with you?" Yusuke asked.

Hiei and Kurama turned to see what he was talking about and found Kuwabara standing with one hand clamped under his armpit.

"I weaseled the ice maidens," he reluctantly confessed.

"After I specifically told you not to?" Kurama asked.

"I thought maybe they wanted to come down from the roof space," Kuwabara explained. "I put my hand up to help them and this happened."

He took out his hand, revealing that his skin was deathly pale and surrounded by a small cloud of steam.

"Run it under a hot tap, idiot!" Yusuke said.

"No, it's too badly frozen for that," Kurama said. "You need to warm it gradually. You may have suffered lasting damage though. That looks like severe frost-bite."

"What?" Kuwabara yelped. "If it's that badly frozen, shouldn't I just put it in hot water?"

"No!" Kurama and Hiei said in unison.

"But…"

"I'm going to negotiate with our guests, Yusuke, Hiei make sure he doesn't put his hand in hot water."

Kurama picked up one of the bags of food and left the cabin, heading back towards the access ladder to the roof storage area the ice maidens were still concealed in. Yusuke watched him go before turning to Hiei.

"Where's the toilet?" he asked.

"Excuse me?" Hiei echoed.

"I need to use the little boys' room, where is it?" Yusuke asked.

"In the back, on the right," Kuwabara replied.

"There's a toilet in this vehicle?" Hiei asked.

"Well, I think it's a toilet…" Kuwabara said slowly. "I mean, I hope it's a toilet…"

"Ah, good enough for me," Yusuke said. "Hiei, make sure Kuwabara doesn't put his hand in cold water."

"Hot water," Hiei corrected him.

"Right…" Yusuke said. "I was just testing you, making sure you were paying attention and knew what to do."

Yusuke clawed through the bags he had been carrying, eventually selecting an apple and leaving with it. Hiei turned to Kuwabara, who flinched as their eyes met.

"Is he going to eat at the same time as using the toilet?" Hiei asked.

"…What is it with you and your obsession with other people's bathroom habits?" Kuwabara asked.

Hiei's eyes moved to Kuwabara's hand.

"It doesn't hurt," Kuwabara lied, trying to keep his face straight as he looked at his hand. "I just can't really move my fingers."

"I can fix it for you," Hiei said, moving towards him.

"You're not gonna set me on fire, are you?" Kuwabara asked cautiously.

"No, heat really isn't the best way to treat an ice burn," Hiei replied, grabbing Kuwabara's wrist and pulling his hand down to better inspect the damage.

"Ice is cold, it doesn't burn!"

"When referring to a wound, the word "burn" describes the effect, not the cause."

"What the hell does that mean?"

Hiei did not answer Kuwabara, but Kuwabara shortly forgot what he had asked as Hiei turned his hand over and placed both of his bandaged hands over it. His touch was surprisingly light, but that only made Kuwabara all the more suspicious about his true motives: after all, Hiei had never exactly been his best friend. Hiei had never actually been his friend. Hiei had often almost killed him and shown no remorse afterwards. And yet now he appeared to be doing something helpful for him, because Kuwabara could feel a tingling in his hand as the effects of having it frozen began to wear off.

"Why are you doing this?" he asked.

He had to know – it made no sense, after all. Hiei sighed and gave an answer that shocked them both.

"I don't know, Kazuma."

Next Chapter: The ice maidens are being very uncooperative, and when the gang reach a roadblock and one of the ice maidens dares to leave her hiding place things only get worse. Chapter 13 – Tense Negotiations