Friday: November 22nd 2013

Time – 8:36 PM

Point of View: Zelda

I hop out of the car and wave. Saria and her mother dropped me off at my house after we hung out. Although I would have liked to sit on her bed forever, I really need to figure a few things out. I mean, realizing you've been attracted to women for your entire life is kind of shocking. I'm going through all of my memories and realizing how much sense it all makes. I can track things all the way back to being four years old… My sexuality has been screaming in my face for over a decade and I've blissfully ignored it until now for one reason or another. I walk inside and call for Link. He's not home. This is a rare occasion where I'm happy he's gone. I walk over to the house phone and pick it up.

Wait… Who do I even call? Fi is in no position to help me with something like this. Not that she wouldn't, I just don't want to put any more weight on her shoulders right now. Once everything's figured out I'm sure I'll tell her. Besides, it would be kind of awkward to call her up and randomly say I'm attracted to women. Who then!? Ah! I'm pretty sure Midna has pointed out hot girls once or twice. She even said that if she could she would screw that one singer… What was her name?

Unimportant! I dial her number and wait for her voice on the other end.

"Hey Zelda. When are you gonna get a cellphone like the rest of the planet?" She laughs.

"Midna, can you walk over? It's not dark yet and Link can drive you home. That or you can just spend the night."

She laughs.

"Yeah? I guess. Everything okay?"

"Totally, just need to talk to you about a few things."

Around fifteen minutes later Midna knocks on my door. I let her in and sit down in the living room. She's just looking at me in that way she always does. I swear, she's way smarter than she lets on… She always struggles with assignments, but she has that expression of someone who's looking into your soul and reading it perfectly. We both sit there for a moment waiting for the other to speak up. Finally when I realize she's going to let me begin for once, I speak up.

"I think I might like girls." I blurt out.

Her eyes widen and a small smile comes to her lips. She clears her throat.

"Fi?" She chuckles.

Now it's my turn to have widened eyes.

"Huh? No." I shake my head. "The new girl, Saria. We kissed on her bed for like an hour today."

She sits up like something very wrong just happened. Just a moment later she nods.

"Oh, Saria. Of course. I've seen her around. She's really cute…" She laughs, getting her phone out.

"Well at first I didn't know what was happening. I just really wanted her to think I was cool. Next thing I knew she was kissing me and I wasn't pushing her away… I think we're dating." I blush.

She laughs.

"Dating? That's awesome Zel! I didn't think you had it in ya, much less with a girl."

I wrinkle my nose, giggling.

"And what's that supposed to mean? I could get any boy I wanted." I cross my arms, faking offense.

"If you wanted." She adds, causing us both to laugh.

"So yeah. You've talked about wanting to bang chicks before… I just thought you'd be the person to call."

She nods a few times in thought.

"Does Fi know?" She finally asks.

I sigh.

"There it is again. Why do you keep bringing Fi up? Is there something I should know?" I question, seriously confused.

I've known for a while now that Midna and Malon's jokes about Fi and I are slightly more than poking fun. I never really brought it up because I just assumed we were both straight. Now I know that I'm attracted to girls and that complicates things…. Am I… Do I like Fi? I shake my head. No. The odds of us both being attracted to girls are way too slim. The realism of that barely matches that of a bad romance novel aimed for young teens. And even if she were gay, I'm dating a cute girl with plenty of similar interests… No, Fi is too special. I wouldn't chance our relationship on something as fickle as romantic attraction. That can fade at any time…

"I've only brought her up twice." Midna defends herself.

"Is she into girls?" I ask, seriously conflicted.

Midna stops.

"I dunno." She admits, looking away.

"Don't think I'm some oblivious blonde Midna. You ship us so damn hard. It needs to stop. It's always so embarrassing."

She nods.

"That's fair. Now that I know you're into girls it's all become…" She searches for the right words. "A lot less funny."

"If it means anything, I never thought it was funny." I sigh, holding my face in my hands.

"So… Saria? Tell me about her." She smiles.

I giggle a bit, blushing as I remember tonight.

"We walked home from school. Her mom is super nice… Then we sat on her bed for a while… She told me about her life."

"And then she took you to smooch town?" She laughs.

"Shut up! I would hardly call it 'smooch town'. Anyway, after we were done kissing she told me about some story concepts." I explain, still blushing.

"Story concepts? She's a writer?"

"Yeah. She has this one story that's really developed and interesting… I can tell it has a lot of time put into it. I'd tell you about it but she asked me to keep it private. You know how easy stealing things can be."

Midna crosses her legs, clicking her tongue.

"Already telling you her secrets and desires huh?"

"Shut up! I called you to help me think, not harass me."

"What'd her lips taste like?" She raises a brow, grinning.

I go completely red now.

"N-Nothing! I dunno! I wasn't paying attention…" I lie, looking away.

"You said that she kissed you for like an hour. C'mon!"

I sigh in defeat.

"Her lips tasted like apple cider and mint… I really liked it."

She bursts out laughing. Now I'm really confused.

"You're so gay!" She laughs, getting ahold of herself.

"That's kinda the idea." I laugh, mildly annoyed.

"No, I mean, anyone can be attracted to the same sex. But some people just act gay. It's not a bad thing, it's just how you are."

I laugh along with her. I guess I can understand that. It's not the first time I've heard the word used in that way. I sit back in my chair and smile. Life is crazy. This morning I woke up single and straight. And now? Now I'm in a relationship with a girl that I made out with for an hour. But isn't that exciting? You never know what life's gonna throw at you next. And of course sometimes it's bad. Believe me, I know that bad can come unexpectedly. But I guess good things can come out of the dark too. I'm really looking forward to Monday now. I hardly ever look forward to school. Knowing Saria will be there in Literature suddenly makes the entire day seem more tolerable.

"Anyway, I'm really happy for you Zelda. Finding someone is tough, especially for gay teens. You're really lucky."

I nod my head.

"You don't…" I stop myself.

Should I even ask this? What does it matter? Even if Fi is the biggest lesbian on the planet, I'm still dating someone. I shouldn't be wondering who's gay and who's straight when I'm already really gay for Saria. Despite all of those logical reasons not to ask, I still clear my throat and do it.

"You don't think Fi's gay… Do you?"

Midna thinks for a minute before shaking her head.

"Nah… She dated Ghirahim for a month. Told me she got to second base with him… Don't worry about it." She smiles.

I nod my head.

"Thanks Midna… You're always there for me."

She smiles, nodding as well as she fidgets with her phone.

"Just texting my Mom. She's wondering where I am."

Friday: November 22nd 2013

Time – 9:00 PM

Point of View: Fi

My heart stops after reading Midna's text. I sit down as my entire body is overcome with a chilling sensation that I can't identify. Everything slows down, and I feel my eyes slowly getting more and more damp. I put the phone down and shake my head. On the screen, clear as day, I can still see her message.

"Zelda is dating a girl."

This was easily my worst fear. Zelda being straight was bad enough, but I had already come to terms with it being the most likely possibility. The only other possibility in my mind was she had a secret crush on me and we're both just shy losers. Now I know that's not the case. It's all so clear to me now. Zelda Harkinian is attracted to girls alright, just not to me. My head falls back onto the couch and I quietly cry in the empty house.

What girl? As conceded as it sounds I really thought there was no way she wouldn't like me if she were gay. I thought that was the one thing standing in our way. And now I find that there's someone better than me out there? Now I find that Zelda is feeling butterflies in her stomach about some stranger… Why am I being so dramatic? Four months ago I didn't know Zelda. If I had gone to a different high school her dating this girl wouldn't mean anything to me. So why am I treating it like my entire life is getting effected? I can get past this… I should be able to very easily. You know what? I'm smart, cute, and a few other things I'm sure… I don't need to hang around waiting for Zelda… I shouldn't hang around waiting for Zelda.

I sit down at my desk and shuffle the computer's mouse for a few seconds to wake it up. Facebook is open… I should just message someone… Anyone who's attractive… I scroll through my friends list and see who has added me throughout the school year. Whenever I get a request I just accept it and move on. A surprisingly large amount of people have actually sent requests… I sift through them as well as requests that I haven't accepted and find someone who seems perfect.

"Ruto…" I say out loud, enjoying the sound.

She added me thirty-seven days ago… I could easily come up with some excuse as to why I'm messaging her now.

"Accept." I click, adding her to my list.

I walk into the kitchen and grab a drink. Upon my return I'm greeted with a notification ringing throughout the room. I smile. It seems Ruto has messaged me. I sit down and take a sip, reading her message.

"Hi Fi! I forgot that I even sent that request."

I smile. I should mention that I added her specifically because her sexuality is listed as 'pan' and her relationship status is 'single.' We have no mutual classes and very few mutual friends. It's very likely that she has a crush on me. Unfortunately for her I have nothing public about myself that would hint towards my sexuality. I understand the feeling of yearning for someone and not knowing if there's even a point. I respond.

"Yeah, sorry. I was going through and deleting requests and finally came upon yours."

That should sow the seeds of curiosity. She'll wonder why I didn't purge her request along with all the others. She'll likely come to the conclusion that there's something immediately noticeable about herself that I appreciated. The optimistic side of her will hope that it was attraction, and then I'm in. It's easy to keep a conversation going with someone who's pining over you. You can talk about anything, everything, or nothing and they'll still be just as interested.

"Oh yeah? Why'd you accept mine then? lol"

A smile comes to my lips. Exactly as planned. A small part of me is already regretting what I'm doing. Manipulating someone is wrong… I'm only doing this because Zelda found someone… But at the same time I don't exactly care. I believe that Ruto likes me. If that's the case there's no harm in attempting a relationship with her. If anything it'll benefit her more than me. I keep telling myself this as I type on.

"Honestly? You look really cute in your profile picture." I reply.

What are you doing, Fi?

Saturday: November 23rd 2013

Time – 11:30 AM

Point of View: Zelda

I wake up to the soft sound of Midna breathing. We're both lying on the couch wrapped in a warm pile of blankets. I struggle to free my upper half from the comfy confinements and eventually succeed without waking sleeping beauty. My laptop is currently sitting on the coffee table so it's just barley within reach of my short arms. When I open it, one of my tabs is flashing 'Fi Paladin has messag…' I smile and click the Facebook tab. I freeze when I read the message. What…?

"Zelda, I've been hiding something for a while… I'm dating Ruto Sapphire. She's a sophomore. I just couldn't bear to come out at a time like this. Everything's so stressful and I didn't want to risk word getting out. Seeing as we'll be spending the better part of this week together I finally decided to get it off my chest. I'm sorry for keeping this from you."

"Fi's dating a girl?" I question out loud.

Midna wakes up to this, stretching.

"W-What? No she's not…" She assures me.

After I show her the message the Twili is speechless. I actually have to wave my hand in front of her face to get a reaction.

"Fi… What are you doing?" She whispers to herself.

"Dating a girl. Fi is into girls." I say in disbelief.

Midna gets up and walks to the outlet on the far end of the room. She unplugs her phone and begins typing. Is she messaging Fi…?

I have a very bad feeling about this…