What in the world was he doing here? Perhaps he came back to double check Miss Bennet's accounts?

"Mr. Darcy, ma'am"

Darcy looked flustered, so perhaps he was reconsidering the amount of fortune he required. I wondered why he needed so much money. Perhaps Pemberley was not as prosperous as everyone surmised, or perhaps those habits of expense took more money than I thought. Maybe he was a gambler, which might explain much. Or, perhaps money was not enough, and he wanted a title? Either way, he should have known Elizabeth did not have £50,000 without even asking. I only had the £30,000 our family usually provided, the same as Georgiana.

It was all so vexing. I liked Miss Elizabeth very much, even though we had only one proper conversation, with half of that had been spent in my abject mortification, and the other half spent in her teasing. I was loathe to let my cousin toy with her… although come to think of it, she looked much more amused than aggrieved. This was most peculiar! Did she even want to marry the loggerhead? She had asserted quite clearly that she did not just five minutes prior, so I must take her at her word.

I stood up with Elizabeth and made my greeting, although her curtsy admittedly looked better than mine. Mother always insisted mine was absolutely perfect and needed no improvement, and as usual it was easier to agree than to challenge her.

Elizabeth replied in the usual way, "Mr. Darcy", sounding like she had left out part of what she intended to say, such as perhaps, 'did you get lost on the way to Rosings' or maybe, 'I am still nearly £50,000 short the same as this morning'… well, I could not think of what else she might say.

My own greeting was barely civil, "Darcy"

I did my best not to curl my lip in disgust at the man, although I doubt my best was very good; and he looked at me in nervous confusion. The only thing I could think of to explain his apprehension was that he probably had no idea that I had worked out his intention to propose. He would have no way to know Elizabeth had told me about his conversation that morning, or his habits of expense. I was tempted to ask him about those, but that seemed like breaking a confidence, so I would have to wait at least five minutes.

He exerted himself to minimal politeness, still wondering why I looked at him with little more favor than I would a piece of dog… well, dog business on my shoe.

"Miss Bennet, I hope you are feeling better. I came by to check on you."

Elizabeth just looked at him in confusion, apparently wondering why he had to check on her after having such a thorough discussion only that morning. Her condition could not have changed all that much in a few hours, and she had asserted their parting was quite amicable.

"It is only a headache, Mr. Darcy. I am fine."

She seemed to be debating having him sit or throwing him out on his ear, but he reacted before she did.

"I beg your pardon ladies. I can see you were engaged in discussion. I have no wish to invade your privacy. I shall go."

Elizabeth seemed content with that answer, but I was not. I wanted to rattle him, and then I wanted an answer to why he had suddenly decided to jilt my best friend. Of course, having a single conversation with Miss Bennet probably did not qualify her for best friend status, but I was frightfully short on friends. Of course, since he had never actually proposed marriage, and Elizabeth neither expected nor apparently desired it, perhaps 'jilted' might have been a stronger word than was strictly required, but I would stand by it.

It was time to disconcert him, so I said, "Sit down, Darcy. Elizabeth and I are quite finished exchanging confidences for the moment, and we could use something new to talk about."

Elizabeth looked at me either in censure or appreciation over my preemptive use of her given name, but I imagined she would have a teasing payback soon. Darcy looked startled as if he could neither imagine me having confidence with anyone, or me preemptively ordering him to sit.

Elizabeth had apparently decided that it was time for me to pay the price for my impertinence immediately.

"Yes, Mr. Darcy, Anne and I were discussing which of my sisters I would lend her for lessons in teasing. Perhaps you could make a recommendation? I was thinking of Jane, but of course as you know she is heartbroken so might not be that merry. Therefore, I imagine it must be Lydia and Kitty. What is your opinion, sir? Would they bring a bit of levity to Rosings?"

Darcy stared her in astonishment, while she simply sat there as if she had asked his opinion on the relative merits of blue ribbons versus pink. Darcy, on the other hand started sweating, and not just figuratively. I actually saw sweat form on his forehead and start trickling down his cheek before he wiped it with his handkerchief.

Elizabeth appeared to be enjoying his discomfiture, so perhaps she was not as indifferent about his lack of affection or need for fortune as she had previously asserted, and what was that about a heartbroken sister?

I opened my mouth to ask a question, but she stopped me momentarily with a glance, and said, "Or perhaps Mary might be better? Anyone can always profit from Fordyce. What think you, Mr. Darcy?"

The way he was squirming, she was apparently not so happy about being cast aside over mere money. Hah! I was enjoying my cousin's squirming immensely, and even if Elizabeth was squeamish, I was not and I would understand these habits of expense if it killed me… or more likely Darcy.

He finally, let out a gulp that sounded like he swallowed a hedgehog whole, and said, "All of your sisters are quite lovely, Miss Bennet. I am certain any of them would do."

Elizabeth just smiled that enigmatic smile and said, "Thank you, Mr. Darcy. That was most helpful."

She stared at him until he started squirming again, then abruptly released him as if he were entirely forgotten and said, "Anne, you must decide. Oh, and do you care for them at the parsonage, or do you intend them to stay at Rosings with your mother?"

Wicked, Wicked woman. She was no longer my best friend… or was she?

I thought it was about time for her to see that I had learned my lessons well, despite the brevity of instruction. She would see I had learned to tease with the best of them. She was to be hoisted by her own impertinence.

"Lizzy, you know full well I have been a selfish being all my life. I truly cannot be satisfied with only two sisters. I really must have the lot and you of course as well."

Now she looked truly shocked, as if she thought she may well have gone too far.

I just smirked at her and said, "Of course, you know for a fact that Mother would never approve the scheme at Rosings, so I am afraid we are all for Pemberley. Could we start Saturday week?"