Hello there, for anyone who is still reading this fanciful story of Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, sorry for the long wait, but life (real) does get in the way sometimes.
You may need some tissues if crying is something that effects your eyes when our Jedi get hurt or even worse.
Thank you for reading and I do hope you like it. Perhaps let me know with a review either way.
000
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The healers worked quickly to stabilise Obi-Wan as he lay motionless on the gurney. Tubes were attached to his body and the healers were frantically searching for a miracle that would save this young boy's life.
His chest lay open by the healer's knife and they stitched and joined pieces together. It was an impossible task and one that they anticipated not to complete. At each beep of the machine monitoring his heart they expected a loud long beep indicating that the battle to save him was over.
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000
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Far Away in quiet solitude, Obi-Wan drifted in unconsciousness feeling at peace; with a sense of well being filling him, but a rather annoying beeping sound enticed him to open his eyes.
A bizarre image unfolded as his eyes focused.
He appeared to be floating above a scene, high in what appeared to be clouds. He didn't like climbing high and he wondered why he felt so calm.
He couldn't recall what he'd been doing, and why he was here! His mind seemed to be in a fog too, but he felt like he'd remember soon and he lifted his hand to his face; wiggling his fingers. They glowed against the misty white haze surrounding him.
A memory surfaced of a mist similar to this one. A fond memory, when he stood on the rock ledge half way up the tallest waterfall in the temple gardens.
Then the fine mist of water floated down and little bubbles settled on his arms. It was so refreshing on a hot day. He smiled remembering how much trouble he'd been in when the Crèche Master found him.
Gazing closer at his arms, realising they were dry, and when he waved his hand in the mist it swirled around forming circles. It was an incredible sensation and for some reason he knew he'd been here before.
Looking down his eyes focused on the bed below him. People were standing around it, and he stretched his arm out to see if he could touch any of them, but he was too high. He smiled because he felt so happy and he thought it was amusing that he was having this weird dream.
He'd had strange dreams before, but this one attracted his attention because the boy on the bed looked so familiar.
Concentrating on the scene he could see tubes attached to him; realising the people must be healers.
Another thought came to mind. Was this a vision that he was supposed to decipher; because if it was it was only confusing him.
He didn't want to disturb them, but he felt that if he was to figure this out he needed to know what was happening, so he spoke directly to them.
"Excuse me, but what is wrong with that boy?"
He waited, and wondered why the healers didn't answer him, or even look up at him. It was as if they didn't hear him.
So he asked again. "Excuse me, can you tell me what is wrong with that boy?"
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Frustrated at the lack of answers he sighed, ready to ask again. However, a response came from somewhere off to his side.
The voice seemed vaguely familiar, and he focused on the figure that appeared through the mist.
"He is returning to the spirit world of the Force, his time down there has ended."
Obi-Wan gazed at the tall well dressed Jedi. His arms were stretched out toward Obi-Wan in a welcoming manner.
Not understanding, Obi-Wan repeated his words. "Returning to the spirit world?"
"Yes, beyond the veil of the mist." The Jedi said half turning and pointing his arm behind him.
Obi-Wan nodded gazing around him."What happened to him?"
"Look closely at him, Obi-Wan."
Puzzlement about several things spread across Obi-Wan's face. He glanced up at the man before letting his eyes search the scene below him.
"Is that me!" he said whispering; bringing his focus back to the Jedi Master.
"Yes, it is, you can let go now, it is time to come with me." The glowing apparition said calmly.
Something felt wrong about doing that and he shook his head slowly. "You know my name, but who are you? What happened?"
"I am your guardian, and I'm here to return you to the Force."
"But, I feel I have a mission to complete?"
"The mission has failed and you are coming home; albeit long before your destined time."
He glanced down at his mortal body and then up again. "I failed?"
"No, the failure was not of your doing and soon when you have completed the transition and returned to your original form you will remember everything and understand."
"Completed the transition, and return to my original form; what do you mean?"
"Like me Obi-Wan, not the child you are now."
"Do I know you?"
"Yes my friend, you know me very well, and we've been friends for hundreds of years, over many lifetimes.
"Friends...Over many lifetimes? I don't understand! You're old!" Obi-Wan said, then put his hand over his mouth.
"I'm sorry Master; I didn't mean to be disrespectful."
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The Jedi laughed and it sounded joyous. "Only you can say what you think and make me laugh my friend, you were always the forward one and got me into trouble countless times through many millennia. Yes, your original form is just like me. Grey hair, beard and wrinkles, although distinguished ones, but wrinkles nevertheless."
"If I am like old like you why do I look like a child?"
"You and I have lived many lifetimes, sometimes together and others individually. I am André, and I was your guardian and guide in this your current lifetime."
"You do seem familiar Master André ... Is it your voice I hear sometimes when I meditate to the Force!"
André bowed. "Yes it is."
Obi-Wan gazed thoughtfully at Master André. "It doesn't feel right that I should come with you now. I'm sure I have something to do... don't I?"
"Not anymore."
Obi-Wan looked back down, "I don't seem to remember why, but I was supposed to help someone."
"You can't my friend, it's too late."
"No, it can't be too late!"
André could sense Obi-Wan's panic and moved to stand next to him placing a hand on the small shoulder.
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000
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André, during his lifetimes was a Master Jedi, who through acts of valour had been granted the title of custodian of the living by the power of the Force.
Obi-Wan in his adult form was also a custodian of the living residing in the flow of the spirit world until needed.
However, unforseen events caused a shift in the motion, and this was the first time that his friend Obi-Wan, would return to the flow as a child.
Their connection spanned a thousand generations of life and death, and as Jedi brothers they'd fought and died together in several wars including the great hyperspace war.
Both of them had lived full lives through the generations and their selfless actions had assured them a place in the flow to serve the Force as it saw fit.
André gazed deep into his friend's eyes, but they were still full of innocence and despair of a child.
"You are troubled my friend."
"I am Master André! I sense the truth in what you are telling me, but I find that I cannot accept that truth. I cannot leave. We have to try harder, or I sense there will be dire consequences if we don't!"
"You are still thinking as a child Obi-Wan; you're consumed by a child's grief and perceived failings. You are blaming yourself for not succeeding and I know your memories are returning to you." He said.
"But as that child, your grief and dejection overwhelmed you causing you to close your link to the force; as a result you didn't heed my warnings."
"I'm sorry, I was confused and I couldn't focus, and then I felt that I had to save Master Kain, because it wasn't his time to die. I thought I had my sabre and I was going to deflect the blaster fire. I reached for it, but I didn't have it, now I remember I left it at the temple."
"You're right about Master Kain, but he would have survived you know."
"I know now, but at the time I wanted to do something right before I became a farmer. I remember Master Jinn said that was all I was good for and I couldn't stop thinking about him saying I would turn."
Obi-Wan looked down at his body below him. Healers were agitated and were hurriedly passing instruments to one another. He could feel intense anxiety from them and he turned back to André.
"Will they save me? I have to change Master Jinn's mind about me!"
"No Obi-Wan, they cannot save you, Master Jinn has made his choices and has set in motion a shift in the future."
"No please! His future doesn't bode well for the Jedi, I won't complete the transition, send me back! I will change his mind."
"It is too late Obi-Wan, please don't fight it come with me."
Obi-Wan sighed; as he sensed Andre was right. "What did I do that made him dislike me so much?"
"It wasn't your doing Obi-Wan, Master Jinn's perceived failures of his past, and the anger he held close to his heart prevented him from listening to the wisdom that the Force tried to instil in him; instead he listened to those voices that wanted to drag him into the darkness."
"I've failed to save him and I've failed the Force too."
"Obi-Wan you mustn't dwell on Master Jinn, you were just a child and you were provoked beyond your comprehension. Influences outside your control conspired against the union between you two. The Force spoke to him on many occasions, but he refused to listen. He used his power to hurt you when he should have used it to see you. There is goodness in the galaxy and he only had to centre himself and look beyond his own perceived misery to see it. It was there in front of him all the time."
Obi-Wan looked down, but the mist was blocking his view.
"He must find his own way to enlightenment Obi-Wan, you did all you could to show him the way."
André rested his hand on Obi-Wan's head as the mist surrounded them.
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000
.
The Force was agitated and in the murky midst of it all Qui-Gon battled his demons, and he didn't like what he'd done.
His words had driven Obi-Wan to doubt himself and it had left him in a state of uncertainty and now he was dying.
His thoughts raced from one biting conversation to the next and each one had pressed Obi-Wan closer to this point.
Qui-Gon's movements seemed sluggish as he ran down the ramp, he felt like the weight of the galaxy was on his shoulders.
His com-link continually buzzing sent him into a spiral of depression, as in his mind if he answered it, the end would have come.
He wouldn't accept that Obi-Wan had died. He needed to see him and he would 'will' him to live.
If anyone was in the corridors he didn't see them as he rushed down to the waiting room. His eyes were focussed on the form of a Jedi Master standing with his back to Qui-Gon and he presumed it was Master Kain.
"Master Kain!" he called out.
Qui-Gon drew in a halting breath when Kain turned, and he recognised the red stain clinging to the master's robes. A chill filled Qui-Gon with shame and disgust in him-self.
"Yes; Master Jinn. The Council said to expect you, I've been trying to contact you." he said showing Qui-Gon his com-link.
"Where is Obi-Wan?"
"The healers took him to surgery through that door. No one has come out to tell me anything about his condition, but he's still alive."
Qui-Gon glared at the door and said. "And he will stay that way!"
He stepped past Kain and stretched out. Obi-Wan's force signature was there, but it was very faint.
He had to see Obi-Wan and he wasn't going to wait. He pushed the doors harder than he'd expected and they flew open thudding against the wall.
A long grey corridor beckoned to him and he moved quietly forward, only stopping when he reached the surgery doors.
He could sense that the healers were working frantically, and no matter how much he wanted to see and speak to Obi-Wan, he would have to wait.
His intense frustration sent him circling like a caged nexu, and in the end he returned to the waiting room and sat heavily on a seat, ignoring a worried look from Master Kain.
He closed his eyes and demanded that the Force grant him his request to speak to Obi-Wan. (Obi-Wan please hear my words? I'm sorry for the way I treated you – I do want you to be my apprentice, please answer me.)
He waited in anticipation, but there was no response, and his culpability rose knowing that he didn't have much time to tell Obi-Wan he was sorry. He continued to press the force to let Obi-Wan answer him.
A whisper of a sound in his head stopped his self-pity and he listened. However it wasn't the voice that he wanted or expected to hear.
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/Why do you call so keenly, for the one who you refused to acknowledge in life?\\
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Qui-Gon's face reddened and he glared at Kain who he presumed had said that to him. However the other Jedi was talking to someone on his com-link. He glanced around, but no-one else was there.
/Still determined to believe that you have all the answers to all the questions and you are the only one who has been hurt. \\
/Who are you, where are you?\\ he thought.
/You don't know? You of all people, so convinced that the Force is eternal, here, there, and everywhere and waiting for you to command.\\
The voice was definitely inside his head and that revelation made him feel small and shook him to his core. He sensed that whoever was speaking to him was not of this realm. He'd always thought of the Force as an entity that could interact with the Jedi and now he knew it to be true.
/Then I command the Force to give Obi-Wan back to me so I may train him and raise him to knighthood.\\
/Yes I know that of you, all your life you've concerned yourself with your own personal needs and wishes, never have you cared of what became of others who did not fit into your plans and now you command the Force to bow to your will as though it is greater than the will of the Force.\\
/Please, I have wronged him and I am guilty, do what you want to me, but I don't want him to die thinking I didn't want him.\\
/But you didn't want him, you made that quite clear! You want to change your mind and apologise, now that it's too late.\\
/I wanted him to know that he was worthy to be a Jedi. He was more deserving of the title than I, and I would give my life freely if you give him the chance to be what I know that he should have been.\\
/Obi-Wan is in the hands of the Force now.\\
/No! Don't take him, take me instead.\\
Qui-Gon waited for an answer, but none came and he closed his eyes trying to draw an answer from the Force. Waves of despair flowed through Qui-Gon and his anger engulfed him. He couldn't release his fears and darkness surrounded him. He felt like he would explode any minute.
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000
.
Master Kain was disturbed by the dark fluctuations and ripples in the force that were bouncing around Master Jinn. The flow was agitated and it seemed that the man might be on the verge of a breakdown or worse kill someone.
He felt that Jinn wasn't controlling his emotions, or coping. He'd retreated into a meditation pose and Kain presumed he was searching the Force for Obi-Wan's force presence. He was hesitant to disturb the master, but he felt that he should talk to him. However, the doors to the corridor opened and a healer came through and spoke.
"Master Kain, I'm Healer Dalek, are you Obi-Wan's guardian?"
He was about to answer when Qui-Gon rose to his feet and in a second he was towering threateningly in front of him. "I am Qui-Gon Jinn, Obi-Wan is my apprentice and I want to see him!"
Kain felt Dalek's unease rise as Qui-Gon seemed to intimidate him by his mere stance.
"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't realise the boy had a master; you weren't here when Master Kain brought him in. He's in critical condition and is on life support, but if you follow me I will take you to him."
"Thank you Healer Dalek, lead the way." Kain said as he motioned for Qui-Gon to follow the healer.
The walk down the corridor seemed to take forever, and Master Kain wished that the council members were here to handle Master Jinn instead of him.
He didn't know Jinn well enough to offer him any condolences and he was certain that Jinn wasn't in the mood to be told that there is no death only the force.
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000
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Qui-Gon took a deep breath and stepped into the sterile room. He knew Kain was right behind him and although he sought to be alone with Obi-Wan he knew that was out of the question. Master Kain had every right to be there; probably, more so than him.
The room felt cold and lifeless and almost hidden by tubes and a sheet was Obi-Wan's pale and motionless body on the bed, surrounded by machines that were whirring and beeping continuously.
He felt his legs stiffen as he came closer to the only part of Obi-Wan he could see, his face. Such and innocent expression marred only by the grey colouring.
"Oh Obi-Wan, I wish it was me lying there instead of you. I don't deserve to be a Jedi and I'll never forgive myself for what I did to you. If I could give my life in return for yours, I would do it in an instant." He whispered close into Obi-Wan's ear.
He moved the sheet and picked up Obi-Wan's ice cold hand and wrapped his warm one around it gently rubbing the back of the small limp hand trying to stir up some warmth.
If he didn't know Obi-Wan's condition with certainty, he could imagine that Obi-Wan was only asleep and if he called to him he would wake up.
"Obi-Wan, Padawan can you hear me, can you wake up for me?" He whispered.
Qui-Gon waited, hoping for a response, but knowing deep down that it was too late.
He gazed at the innocent child before him, and wondered when his judgement had become so clouded and his Jedi ideals had given way to the cruel and selfish manner that he'd used to push Obi-Wan away. When did he turn his back on his values and his dedication to the Force, when did he lose faith?
Abruptly, the lights in the room flickered and then seemed to glow brighter; the sound of air pumping through the machine vibrated through Qui-Gon's ears and with each pump the sound grew louder, until it slowed to a deafening silence and a gut-wrenching beeping noise filled the room.
Healer Dalek, the nurse and Master Kain knew that this was the moment they'd all been dreading, but none of them expected or could explain the phenomena that occurred before their eyes.
Qui-Gon voice seemed to bounce off the walls as he cried out "No!"
The hand he was holding tingled and he looked at Obi-Wan's face. His entire body began to glow and shards of brilliant white light leapt out from within him. Wispy white ribbons of luminosity curled around his whole body hiding him from view and then the encompassing white spectra rose slowly off the bed.
Everyone in the room including Qui-Gon could not take their eyes off the surprising spectacle as the glowing orb rose toward the ceiling.
Qui-Gon glanced back at the bed, but it was empty. His face contorted in agony and he screamed out for the galaxy to hear.
"No… don't take him from me; please don't go…" A wave of despair and anguish crashed across the flow of the Force causing ripples and Qui-Gon felt his insides burning as he stretched out trying to grasp the glowing orb as it vanished through the ceiling, causing the room they were in to be enveloped in darkness.
It was beyond his grasp and he felt lost and shattered. His shoulders slumped and he lowered his head as his knees gave way bringing him to the cold floor. Closing his eyes and cursing the day he'd been born; his rage at his stupidity rose within him.
Obi-Wan was gone and he could never say he was sorry to the youngling.
" No…No…No!
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000
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Dark storm clouds gathered behind Qui-Gon's closed eyes; rage filling every molecule of his body. He couldn't bear the thought of seeing Master Kain's accusing glare.
An innocent child who asked for nothing more than he deserved was gone. How could he face anyone, he had to flee this place, but where to go, certainly not back to the Jedi temple. They did this; they sent that poor child here to this force forsaken place.
.
000
Chills ran up his spine, it was so cold here. His fists clenched and his back stiffened. He didn't care, nothing mattered anymore. Not life, not the Jedi order; not him. He would not speak to Kain and if Kain knew what was best for him he better not speak either.
He rose stiffly to his feet, opening his eyes as he did. Disorientation overrode the anger simmering under his skin.
Darkness, complete and consuming greeted him and he spun around.
Dizziness sent him off balance and he reached out to steady himself. Adjusting his eyes to the dim light his hand touched cold rock. Expecting to see Kain and the healers glaring at him; surprise and a blossoming headache made him blink at the absence of anything familiar around him.
All gone, the bed and life support machines, the healers too. He couldn't sense Master Kain's aura either.
Fear leads to anger and that leads to hate and hate led to suffering and he was suffering badly, and now he was tormented by his inability to control his surroundings.
His thoughts were in turmoil; irrational fear and anger overpowered his senses and that was an emotion he abhorred.
He tried drawing on the Force; it was around him in abundance, however, in his current state it was blocked by torrents of self incrimination, allusive like sand seeping through the pores in his skin.
North, South, East, and West, he turned to each direction, but everywhere he looked was nowhere he'd been before. The walls began shimmering, soft glowing crystals jutted out of the walls surrounding him.
Light and dark filled this cold place. It was unlike any crystal cave he'd ever been in. Fear gripped him in its clutches and he dropped to the ground unable to prevent the scream that left his throat.
Tbc...
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