Chapter Six | Bestest Friends Who Kissed Once

Emma finds herself walking into her bedroom at ten o'clock feeling airy and just the tiniest bit giggly after all of the laughter and gossip Girl's Night allowed. It's nice, being home, and getting to see everyone again. Even if it means perpetuating a lie.

Her stomach clenches to almost a nauseating level as she thinks about it all again- the endless lying, the plan-making that will never be followed through, the pictures and the wedding plans. It's all so much and she's terribly selfish for keeping this going.

She was selfish dragging Killian into this to begin with. They're friends, not lovers, and it's far outside of his wheelhouse having to be in a castle surrounded by royalty.

With her eyes squeezed tight, Emma stands silently at her bedroom door and wishes, almost childishly, that they could go back to the diner where she decided on a desperate whim that this was the way to solve her problems.

Nobody will look at her the same again, of this she's sure. Especially her family. Maybe even Killian himself.

But then a little voice at the back of her head speaks up, reminding her of why she'd done it to begin with. Her parents said years and years ago, that if she wasn't married by the time she turned twenty-five, they had someone they'd set her up with.

Knowing Mary Margaret, the minute Emma walked through the doors upon arriving solo to the castle, she'd basically already be married to this mystery guy.

While both options for the way this could have gone taste awful in her mouth, so much so she can hardly stomach any of it, this is probably the lesser of the two evils.

At least her family will have a happy Christmas, and she can manage one too. Killian is incredibly patient, and an amazing friend. They've spent every Christmas together since they met, so she'd miss him if she came here without him anyway.

Taking a deep breath, Emma turns the knob and once she steps into the mini apartment, she toes out of her shoes at the door and finds the light on for her as well as a covered plate with a sandwich and chips waiting for her.

"I was hoping you'd be back sooner. There was a Pixar marathon that just finished."

With wide eyes, she looks up to find Killian leaning against the door leading into her bedroom.

He looks absolutely sinful, with mussed hair and sweats hanging low on his hips. He's wearing a tight tee shirt that leaves not much to the imagination, practically begging her to stare at the flex of his arm muscles where they're folded against his chest.

On top of it all, he's smirking slightly, that devilish eyebrow lifted as if they haven't spent the entire day playing fake fiancé.

"Damn," Emma shakes her head. She grabs a chip and has a bite. "Sorry I abandoned you to dinner alone with my family."

Killian waves her off as he steps toward her. "We had a grand time without you."

Emma laughs once. "Yeah?"

His smile spreads playfully. "Aye. It was quite enjoyable. Had a proper steak dinner, too."

Having been apart for a while, she finds herself wondering how he'd behaved. She knows he wouldn't be nasty around anyone, nor would he spoil this thing for her, but she still wonders.

Seeing him so happy has her conflicted, because she keeps imagining that he must hate her for the choice she made to drag him along to Misthaven. Quiet settles between them as she considers this.

Killian's expression fades ever so slightly. She thinks he might have something he wants to say- actually, she knows he does, because he has this longing look in his eyes that he's had since early this morning.

"What'd you talk about?" she asks to deter whatever brutally honest thing he may have said.

Killian shrugs. "This and that. Mostly about you. There may have been a few stories about baby Princess Emma that I found immensely enjoyable."

Emma's eyes widen. "What did they tell you?"

Her best friend keeps his lips pressed together and his eyebrows wiggle. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

She glares at him and hits him in the chest. "What'd they tell you?"

Killian laughs, a big booming laugh that bounces off the ceiling. "Just about silly baby stories. Your mum told me you were keen on steaking through important meetings without your diaper on and you also liked smearing chocolate on the walls. That's a rather expensive hobby, love."

Emma rolls her eyes. She retreats back toward her food. Briefly, she wonders if it was him who prepared the plate for her, or if it was her mother. It could have easily been either of them.

"How was Leo?" she asks as she has another bite of a chip. "You went on a hike, right?"

"Yeah," he nods. "We had loads of fun. We had a good chat too."

Emma lifts an eyebrow. "Oh?" He hums, but won't crack. She tosses the meal into the fridge, thinking she might want it later, and then moves toward her best friend. She folds her arms. "What'd you talk about with him?"

Killian chuckles. "I think you've got a good idea on that, love."

She hums. "Well, I'm glad you're getting along."

They stare at one another for a few moments and Emma finds herself twisting the ring wrapped around her finger.

She gets to thinking about the day's events, from the start at brunch, to the kiss that still sends a chill up her spine, to the photo session and the lingering touches- she didn't hate it. In fact, she enjoyed it.

She's not sure what it means, not yet. But at least she has her head on straight for the most part.

"Hey, do you want to see something?" Emma asks.

Killian lifts a curious eyebrow. "If it's your baby photos I'm afraid your mum already took me on that journey, love."

She gasps. "Not my baby pictures, but that's good to know."

He chuckles. "All right. Show me something, Nolan."

Emma grins at the familiar nickname and turns around to take him out of her bedroom apartment and into the hall. She looks at him.

"When I was growing up, I always wanted a secret space where I could just go and not have to deal with royal business. So, my parents had this whole space designed for me and they promised me they'd never come bother me when I was up there."

"Well, color me intrigued."

/

Emma takes him to the rooftop, where the lantern lights are still glowing beneath the shine of the moon and stars above. The stars are one of Killian's very favorite things and she knows he misses seeing them from the city where they live.

She smiles wryly and turns to Killian. "Well, what do you think of my hideaway?"

Killian hums as he look all around the space. His head tilts backward, so he can look up at the sky, and a slow grin spreads on his face.

"Bloody hell," he breathes, a white cloud puffing past his lips. He looks down at her and gestures upward happily. "I forgot what it's like to see stars."

She brushes her hair behind her ear as she moves toward the outdoor bar with intentions of grabbing the rum. With the bottle in her grasp, she turns back to her best friend.

"Think of it as an apology?" she asks on a shrug. "For leaving you all afternoon?"

Killian eyes the rum and his tongue darts between his lips briefly as he reaches up to scratch behind his ear. "Well, I can't say no to a glass of rum under the stars, even if I tell you I didn't mind spending the afternoon with your family."

Emma grabs them glasses and carries them with her toward the bench swing that her father had given her for her birthday one year. He'd built the thing himself, which was a monumental feat in and of itself. It's cushioned by pillows and she finds blankets tucked in a box beside it.

They sit together on the swing. Emma draws her legs up to fold them and pours Killian some rum. When she offers it to him, he grins wryly and their fingers brush just enough to make her shiver.

Emma has a hard sip of her rum as soon as she pours some for herself and then busies herself with draping a thick blanket over their laps. After she's satisfied, she turns her gaze skyward. Anything to avoid the feelings rising up in her.

"Beautiful night," Killian says lowly.

Emma hums in agreement. She looks over at him.

He's handsome under the warm glow of the lights, with his dark stubble and hair she wants to run her fingers through. He stares up at the night sky with such adoration in his gaze that she wonders if he's about to say something completely profound. He usually surprises her in quiet moments with the things he has to say.

Her thoughts start wandering as she considers the scar in his cheek and how she loves the way his lips curl while he's smiling peacefully like he is now. He has another sip of his drink and Emma averts her gaze because she starts to think about their kiss again, how gentle but at the same time completely desirous it had been.

"Maybe I should move to the country." Killian says suddenly.

She looks at him again and hikes an eyebrow. "What? Why?"

His grin spreads slowly. He sets his empty glass on the table next to him and adjusts his position so he faces her more, shaking the swing ever so slightly as he does.

"To see the stars."

Emma searches his eyes and laughs under her breath. "You wouldn't leave me in the city by myself."

"Oh? You think so, do you?"

Emma nods. She presses her glass to her lips but doesn't sip just yet. "You need me nearby."

"Really?" he asks, those eyebrows of his edging his hairline.

She hums in the affirmative as she drinks the last of her rum. "Who else are you going to complain to at the end of the day?"

Her best friend narrows his eyes slightly. "I think you mean you need me nearby for that reason, love."

They stare at each other in a companionable silence. Both of them smile slightly. Her heart flutters at the way he stares at her.

"Fine," she concedes. "I'd miss you if you left me all alone."

Killian nods. "I'd miss you too. If either of us moved away." He pauses, smiling wryly at her. "You're the best part of my day anyday, Nolan. Liam thinks we're honest-to-God soulmates."

She snorts. "Soulmates?" With a slightly lifted eyebrow, she continues, "Don't you have to be in love to be soulmates?"

He shrugs. "I don't know. Perhaps we're not soulmates then. Perhaps we're… something else altogether."

"Like what?" she asks.

"Like…" he puffs out a breath and glances up at the sky. For a moment, he considers it, as if it means anything at all. "We're best friends. No, better than best. Bestest friends."

Emma laughs. He meets her eyes, proud of himself. "You're good at English."

"I'm very good at English. It was my best subject in school, I'll have you know."

Emma hums. She presses her lips together and takes a deep breath through her nose. Thoughtfully, she says, "Bestest friends who kissed once."

Killian's face immediately warms, his smile and jovial spirit fading just as fast. He averts his eyes and reaches behind his ear to scratch.

"It was… acting."

"Right." Emma agrees quickly. "We had no choice."

Suddenly, the earnest nature of this conversation becomes too much so she looks away, instead staring at the flowers nearby.

It seems that it was too much for him too, because for a few minutes they just sit with this awkward silence heavy over them.

"Do you think you'll ever come back here?" he asks quietly.

She sighs and leans her head back against the cushion, looking up at the stars for a long time. Her chest feels tight with the internal fight she's having over that very question.

"I… don't know," she admits in a whisper. She turns her head to look at him again. He's staring at her, patient and quiet. He nods at her reply. "After this whole… engagement blows over, I have a hard time picturing life here. But…" Emma falls quiet. She shrugs a shoulder. "I kind of miss it."

Killian takes her hand and runs his fingers against her palm for a second before flipping it over. He stares down at his lap where her hand is and then back up at her.

"If you found love, would you move back?" he asks.

Her heart skips a beat, especially with the gentle way his thumb caresses her knuckles. Emma's breath hitches.

"Maybe."

Killian gives her a small smile. "I see."

They continue staring at each other for a few seconds. Emma shifts on the swing so she bumps her knee against his thigh and she stares up at the sky.

"Do you know any constellations?"

He releases her hand and clears his throat.

"Do I know any constellations?" he asks in a teasing tone. "Come on, Emma. Do you know me at all?"

Emma laughs. "Well, then prove it."

She meets his eyes and finds his mischievous grin with a flip of her stomach.

"Alright. As you wish."

/

She sets a late alarm for their second morning in the castle.

They don't have any plans, which is nice, and she assumes her parents will want a lunch, so the pressure is almost completely off for sake of preserving the lie.

Emma wakes up earlier than the alarm is set to go off by a full hour, but it turns out that Killian's awake already. He places his hands on his face and sighs deeply through his nose.

"G'morning."

Emma turns onto her side to face him after checking the time. He removes his hands and mirrors her position.

"What do you want to do today, fiancée?" he asks with a thicker accent than usual, laced with sleep.

Her heart rate quickens at the teasing nickname. She clears her throat before she speaks, "Want to go on a tour of the countryside?"

Killian's eyes brighten. "That sounds interesting."

"Yeah," Emma smiles.

She cracks a yawn and stretches out her legs beneath the covers. She accidentally bumps Killian's leg in the process, making him tease her with a pinch to her side. She laughs and jerks back.

"Stop," she breathes, laughing. "I know you're ticklish too. Don't make me fight back."

Killian wiggles his eyebrows, but thankfully removes his hand. "Very well, Your Highness."

Emma rolls her eyes. "Do you want to go on a tour? Where'd we land on that?"

"I would love to."

She stares at him for a moment silently, smiling at the way the sunlight streams in past the white curtains on the window behind him. He looks good in the mornings, with his bedhead and his sleepy eyes.

"Okay. Do you want breakfast in the castle or do you want to check out my old favorite diner?"

Killian's eyes widen. "There's a diner nearby? And you didn't tell me sooner?" He turns onto his back and puts his hand over his face as she shakes his head slowly. "To think, I thought we were friends."

Emma laughs. She pinches his side so he twitches and flinches his whole body away from her, laughing loudly and abruptly.

"Bloody hell!"

"You deserved it," Emma replies. "For getting me in the first place."

Killian smiles at her as he takes quick breaths in recovery. "Then I suppose I owe you breakfast at your old favorite diner, hm?"

"I'll go get dressed."

Emma stares at him for a few more seconds before she climbs out of bed and steps into her closet. She thinks about what she wants to wear and ultimately decides on a thick sweater and jeans. Something cozy because it's going to be a laid back day, assuming her mother doesn't flip her lid.

When she steps out of her closet wearing her clothes for the day, she finds Killian sitting up in bed, staring at her like he had the morning before when he thought she wasn't looking.

Her face feels just a little bit hotter as she stares at him. "What are you looking at?"

"You," he replies, grinning from ear-to-ear. "You're awfully pretty in the morning."

Emma's heart skips a beat. "Killian…"

Her best friend has called her pretty twice over the course of two days and this time, he doesn't have an audience for her to blame it on.

"It's a compliment," he tells her. "Friends give each other compliments, don't they?"

Something about the compliment doesn't feel friendly, despite his assurance that it was.

"Yeah," she shakes it off. Emma brushes hair behind her ear. "Thanks."

They stand for too long in quiet, it turns out, because there's a knock at the door. With a furrowed brow, Emma moves swiftly away from Killian to the door.

When she pulls it open, she's not even the slightest bit surprised to find her mother waiting.

"Good morning!" She sings.

"Hey, Mom. What's going on? Killian and I were about to go for a tour of the countryside."

Mary Margaret grins as she glances past Emma at Killian. "Well… do you think it could wait an hour or so?"

Emma's mouth falls open as she contemplates her response, but before she can start telling her mother that she'd really just wanted today to be with her friend, a familiar man and woman move into her line of vision, both chatting animatedly.

Her eyes widen. "What the hell is going on, Mom?"

Her mother winces just slightly. "Didn't you get my messages this morning? We made the engagement announcement just a few hours ago. Ariel and Eric are here to film a quick interview."

Emma's heart rams hard against her ribcage. Her jaw falls open. "What?"

"What's going on?" Killian asks curiously from somewhere behind her. Emma whirls around in time to find him standing nearly toe-to-toe with her. He smiles with his teeth at her and then at her mother. "Morning, Mrs. Nolan."

"Good morning," her mother replies. "Can you spare an hour for a quick interview?"

Emma grimaces. The idea of an interview is the least appealing thing in the whole world, and not only that- the whole world knows they're engaged.

This was not what she wanted to happen, especially only after one full day here. Now the truth will come out and Christmas will be ruined, and she really should've known this would happen.

"An interview," Killian repeats slowly. "Is it customary for Emma's suitors to be interviewed?"

Mary Margaret laughs. "No, no. It's an engagement interview. Emma's a public figure. It's just to introduce you and your engagement to the public."

Killian meets Emma's eyes and he frantically lifts his eyebrows at her before clearing his throat. "Ah…"

Emma turns to her mother and holds up her finger. "Give us a minute?"

The queen pulls on a grin and nods. "Of course."

After closing the door behind her, Emma turns to Killian again and holds both hands up. "Okay, so… they posted an engagement announcement."

His eyes grow wide. "What?" She can see the horror spreading to his extremities, as his feet begin to take him away from her before he moves back again. "Bloody hell, Emma! The entire bloody world is in on our charade now."

She knows she has no shot at a simple apology, so she doesn't try.

Her heart begins to race and her stomach ties up in knots. This is the absolute worst day of her life all of a sudden, and it had such promise for being normal.

He runs a hand over his face and takes a nervous step away from her before coming in close again. He points his hand outward, gesturing to the door behind her.

"We've got to come clean. That's the only way we can get out of it now before matters get too much worse than they already are. I'm sure my entire contact list has seen it by now-" He shakes his head and grimaces as he curses. "I did not agree to this when I said I'd come here with you."

"I know," she finally says. "I didn't agree to them sharing our news with the world, but that's what happened anyway."

Killian's eyes are wide. He blinks at her. "As if that helps us right now in any way. Great. Yeah, we'll just explain it away on the Misthaven social media accounts as a mistake because your mum didn't ask permission first. We should've known it was going to happen- we posed-"

He's getting louder with each syllable, his stress level making the veins pop in his forehead. He stares at her intensely and scrubs his hand over his head.

"Shit, Emma. Shit." He tosses his hand at her. "I don't know why I ever thought this would be easy because it's never easy with you."

This is all her fault. Her best friend and the only person she really trusts is angry with her, and it's all because she had to prove herself to her parents.

Suddenly, she feels completely overwhelmed. Tears find her eyes and her lip trembles as she averts her gaze from him.

"Emma, hey," Killian murmurs, worried. He immediately wraps his arms around her and she easily folds into him, her arms sliding up against his back as she's shaken by a gasp for air. "Shh. It's alright."

She feels him press his lips against the side of her head and his gentle voice murmurs in her ear, promising her it'll be okay. She feels safe when he holds her.

"I'm sorry," he murmurs. "I overreacted. It's already done and can't be fixed. I just… don't entirely long for another few weeks when we return home of pretending."

Emma nods in agreement. She's still clinging to him like a lifeline. "I know. I'm sorry."

Slowly, she moves away from him and when she meets his eyes, he reaches out to cup her cheek. She leans into his palm as his thumb swipes at her tears.

"What did you mean, it's never easy with me?" she asks lowly.

The life drains from his face and he glances downward for a second as he tries to recover. He shakes his head as his eyes return to her.

"I… was just angry, in the moment," he says. "I shouldn't have-"

"But what did you mean?" she presses.

Killian stares at her for a few seconds. Slowly, his posture slackens, as if he's been defeated, and he drops his gaze to the floor as he nervously reaches up behind his ear to scratch.

Her heart stops for a beat when he meets her eyes again. His lips part, words just on the tip of his tongue, but he's interrupted- to the slightly confusing relief Emma feels in waves- when her mother taps on the door.

"Emma? Killian? Everything okay?"

Emma searches Killian's eyes, having realized they never came to any sort of conclusion about this. He sighs and nods as he gestures outward to the door in a slightly frustrated motion.

"It's fine. We've hardly any voice in the matter anyway, I reckon."

She'd like to argue that they do, but she knows her mother better than that. So, she turns back around and opens the door, a smile finding its way to her lips.

"Sorry about that." Emma says quickly, immediately finding her best princess face. "Yeah, why not? Let's get it over with."