A/N: I wanna make a few things clear to my readers and to myself. This story, time wise, started literally a week or two after the coven finale, around the beginning of February, but obviously the events are not the same. You've seen Madison, Nan, and Marie alive and well in this story. The girls have not performed the seven wonders. When Fiona proposes the idea of having a child for Cordelia, it is after the attack of the witch hunters. Cordelia did not blind herself and Axeman was attacked by the girls for attempting to murder Fiona, for her not running away with him. Fiona getting pregnant was the cure-all for her cancer. Delphine and Spaulding still run around, they just haven't been pertinent to the story. I will include elements in which the last few episodes had aired, and as a writer for me to have not said this or clarified, I feel mediocre. I rewatched coven and was reminded how much of a bitch Madison was. I wrote her so well in this story, I forgot she was so bitchy and spiteful. If I left anything out, please call me out on it. Just had to put this out for your, and my sake.

I am very much enjoying writing for this story again and here is another update!

Chapter 10: Maybe not

"Surprise!" Fiona was greeted that May morning to a short stack of pancakes with two candles, one pink and one blue, lit up stuck inside the buttery breakfast treats; and her daughter shouting 'surprise' in her face.

"What's this?" She questioned, having absolutely no clue what this was all about.

"Welcome to your second trimester mother!" Cordelia happily answered. Fiona stood in silence with a blank expression on her face. As the pregnancy went on, to Fiona it only meant one thing, her death was nearing.

"What's wrong?" This was not the reaction Cordelia was expecting from her mother. She felt a little let down.

"Well the gesture is sweet, but don't count your eggs before they're hatched, dear. Although my reproductive system is as healthy as a 25 year old's, nothing else is as young." Fiona pulled a chair from the kitchen table and sat down.

"Are you suggesting that I could jinx the baby?"

"Sweetheart, all I'm saying is pregnancy is just a waiting game. Wait for the baby to arrive, and even then don't put all your hopes and dreams in one place. I'm just trying to help you. I really appreciate this, it's sweet." Fiona looked up at her daughter. "Look, Delia, I get that you're excited about the baby, any first time mother would be, and you have every right to be excited, just be cautious. Ok?" Cordelia nodded. She managed to muster up a smile.

"Well, these are still for you." She placed the pancakes in front of her mother and passed her hand over the candles lighting them. "Make a wish." Fiona closed her eyes and sat still for a while, then blew out her candles.

I wish my baby remembers me.

...

The familiar burn of smoke in her lungs and throat kept Fiona from crashing and burning that very day. She tapped the excess ash of the end of her cigarette allowing it to fall on the manicured lawn below her.

"Hey, isn't that bad for a woman in your condition?" Kyle inquired knowingly, causing Fiona to whip her head around.

"A woman in my condition? I'm a ticking time bomb, baby, and if I need a cigarette I'm well going to goddamn have one." Fiona dropped the wrapped tobacco, stomping it out with her shiny black Jimmy Choo's.

"Hey, don't stop on my account, I just figured you don't wanna screw this whole plan, this whole pregnancy thing up."

"I don't, it's just, well, my time is up. If I hadn't got pregnant, I'd be bald and living out the end of my days in pain and weakness. At least this way I'm energized, and if I'm tired it's for good reason. Look at you." Fiona serviced the boy standing in front of her. "This was not supposed to be the way you ended up."

"Is anything supposed to be the way it ends up?"

"Don't go all Aristotle on me now. You know, in the back of that head of yours, you were supposed to be making a difference in the world. You were supposed to be someone who mattered."

"I am someone who matters. Maybe not to the world, but to someone." Fiona paused at his statement. This undead boy found meaning in his newfound life fairly quickly, while Fiona struggled an entire lifetime to find meaning in her own world.

"How did you do it?"

"Do what?" Kyle was confused.

"Find a purpose, for living, for moving on. Especially, from the life you once knew."

"I think it was hard for me at first, I couldn't stop thinking about my old life. My hopes and dreams, my dickheads of friends who died right alongside me, and even my ma. Things disturbed me, made me sad, frustrated I couldn't do anything to fix it all, to make a change, but there was always one thing that pulled me from the brink of all those thoughts. That one thing was Zoe. I think I've managed to move along, by allowing myself to follow my feelings. I wouldn't say impulse, I'm saying feelings. The savior in me stayed I guess." Kyle shrugged. No one really asked him about anything like that. Fiona pulled out another cigarette, lighting it just as she lifted it to her lips, taking a long drag.

"Well hot damn. That was quite the response."

"It's the truth. Why'd you ask?"

"I have spent a lifetime looking for meaning in this life, looking for a person to share that with, and just when I thought I had found that person he tries to murder me. I was a fool to think that relationship was going to last. He was sweet, and I was very fond of our time together but, it was never gonna work. For Christ's sake the man watched me as a little girl." Fiona shook her head in disgust.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. To pity someone like me is an act of foolishness all on it's own. I created this wreck of a life for myself. I sealed my own damn tomb. The day I tried claiming the throne before it was handed to me I set myself up for a lifetime of regret and trying to run away from my problems and pain. And just when I try to make difference, when I begin to find my purpose again, life turns the tables on me and says it's time to go. Well I'm not ready to go. Not in five months, anyway. This wasn't the life I was supposed to live." Fiona took another drag, this time with tears in her eyes. Kyle placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Maybe not, but you'll never know. You should really put that out now." Kyle left Fiona alone standing there frozen, cigarette still in hand.

"Maybe not." Fiona dropped the cigarette stomping it out.

What do you all think of that update? I'm loving writing for Jlange characters again. All feedback is appreciated. The next chapter should be here soon!