NOTE: Surprise, surprise, here I am yet again! I just love these boys and I love writing them! So in this chapter, there is a mention of a cover of (one of my favorite songs) Heat of the Moment by Asia. Here is a link to said cover: watch?v=Z7hEye2yxiU (For some reason, it's only giving me the extension, but if you type in and add this after the slash, it should work. It not, go to youtube and look up "heat of the moment by ninja sex party"! Please give Ninja Sex Party a listening to! They're one of my favorite cover bands and they're super talented and amazing!) I will probably be able to update two more times because Christmas Eve, and, as always, any and all feedback is appreciated! (little side note: I have never had the experience of coming out, but I wanted to take this moment to say I am so super proud of everyone that has and I'm so happy for you! Keep rocking!)
The moment his homework was finished, Craig sat down and started listening to different 80's songs. He let his mind wander, a smile forming the more he thought about coming out. He couldn't wait for Friday. On the last day of school, to kick off winter break, the entire grade would end up going ice skating at Craig's place of work. Even if they didn't skate, students would sit in the bleachers and watch their friends and chat amongst themselves. Two more days. Those two days were the longest days of Craig's life. He just wanted to be out and proud already. He was so excited and it was because he wouldn't be a liar anymore. Friday finally rolled around, and before Tweek joined them for lunch, Craig leaned across the table to his friends.
"Tonight, guys." He whispered, smiling as his friend's eyes widened.
"Dude, really? At the rink?" Clyde whispered back. Craig nodded.
"Be prepared. It's gonna be pretty neat."
"Y-you c-c-could just come out a-and say it, Craig." Jimmy added, chuckling.
"But that isn't the Craig Tucker style."
"What is the Craig Tucker style?" Token laughed.
"You'll see." They all resumed a normal conversation as Tweek walked into the lunch room, all the boys across from Craig hiding their excitement. They weren't just excited to see what their friend was up to, but they were excited for him to finally be himself. They couldn't even begin to imagine what he's been feeling for these past three years, but they know they're happy for him. After school, Craig headed straight to work, his nerves starting to settle into his stomach. Four more hours. He figured he'd at least give Kenny the heads up that he was going to do something at eight o'clock. He skated over to him about a half hour into their shift.
"Hey dude." Kenny said, sipping his hot chocolate.
"Hey, listen, tonight at eight o'clock, after you Zamboni the ice, I'm gonna be doing something, so don't be so surprised." Kenny raised an eyebrow.
"What do you mean by doing something?"
"I can't tell you, but trust me, okay? I…I need this, Kenny." Kenny looked Craig's face up and down, chuckling after a minute.
"Alright, Tucker." Craig gave him a pat on the shoulder as he skated off, his mind racing. He was trying to find an answer to every possible scenario that could happen after he comes out. If someone wants to fight him, he will. If someone calls him some horrible homophobic slur, he'll fight them. If someone starts flirting with him, maybe he'll flirt back (for Craig, this one was hard to find an answer to. He really does like Tweek). Around seven o'clock, he started noticing everyone that was showing up. The feeling of fear pooling into his stomach was starting to become overwhelming. He pulled his phone out, shooting Tweek a text.
You coming to the rink tonight with the guys? He felt his phone buzz a few minutes later.
Yeah but I'm not skating.
Figured. I really want you to be here. I'm doing something special to kick off the break.
What do you mean you're doing something special? What the fuck does that mean, Craig?!
You'll see at eight, so get here soon. Craig pocketed his phone, skating up to Clyde.
"I'm going fucking crazy." He hissed through his teeth, his eyes wide. The fear was finally starting to get to him as he saw it was creeping up on seven thirty. Clyde took him by the shoulders.
"Craig, listen. I've got your back, man. Just think, after tonight…you're free, dude," Craig's cheeks flushed red. "You're still going to be Craig Tucker, the dude I've idolized since, like, third grade. You're still going to be my best friend. You're still going to have our support." Craig smiled, letting out a soft chuckle.
"Thanks Clyde…I really needed that."
"Good. Now go take some laps, kid." Craig jumped a bit as Clyde smacked his ass, turning around to shoot his friend a look, but Clyde was giving him two big thumbs up with a cheeky grin. Craig let out a laugh and started skating, his mind going blank for the first time all day. At seven forty-five, Craig got everyone off the ice so Kenny could Zamboni it. His heart was pounding. His ears were ringing. He felt like he could barely breathe. The fifteen minutes it took for Kenny to Zamboni the ice felt like they went too fast. He let out a shaky breath. You can do this, Tucker. He skated over to where everyone was sitting after hooking his phone up to the speaker system.
"Hey! Let's get fucking excited for the fact it's winter break!" Everyone started cheering, some being dramatic and collapsing against their friends to signify they were "dead", some simply clapping. "Now…I know you all want to get back to skating…but I have a little something I want to do before hand," he shrugged his jacket off, trying not to blush as some girls cheered and whistled at him. He handed it to Clyde, who gave him another thumbs up. "Senior year has kicked our asses so far, and I thought I'd give you all a little Christmas present…if you want to call it that." He swallowed hard and gave a nod, skating over and quickly pressing play on his phone. He went to the center of the rink, scanning for Tweek as fast as he could. With no avail, he closed his eyes, letting himself get lost in the sound of Heat of the Moment, but it was a cover he found online that he really liked. Here goes nothing.
Tweek got out of his car in time to hear Craig's voice, followed by some cheering. He furrowed his brows in confusion, beginning to make his way over. He squeezed in behind some students, hearing the last bit of Craig's speech.
"…if you want to call it that." He watched Craig skate over to the speaker and then to the middle of the rink, his eyebrows still furrowed. He nearly fainted as he heard the song.
I never meant to be so bad to you.
One thing I said that I would never do.
He watched as Craig started attempting to do part of his routine, blushing as he listened to the girls go crazy. Weirdos. He glanced back out at Craig, pushing his way forward to the edge of the rink as the chorus came on.
It was the heat of the moment
Telling you what your heart meant
Tweek couldn't help but notice as Craig flew past him how happy he looked, how happy everyone looked to be watching someone so talented on the ice. Tweek couldn't help but smile. His eyes continued to follow Craig, a laugh escaping his lips as he saw how into it Craig was. He looked so natural. So…relaxed. Tweek blushed as he caught his gaze, waving as he started skating towards him. He grinned as Craig winked, taking the sharp curve of the rink with ease. Pull it together, Tweek, you probably look like a puddle on the floor.
The minute Craig laid his eyes on Tweek, he had this feeling that everything was going to be alright. He felt his hands shaking, however, as he heard the song beginning to wrap up. He took in a deep breath as he finished his little routine, his heart hammering from skating and his nerves. He listened to everyone cheering and clapping, finally releasing the breath he didn't realize he had been holding. Do it!
"Happy Holidays! I'm bisexual!" he yelled as they finished their clapping, everyone's eyes going wide. Craig looked at everyone's faces, his hands shaking against his sides. He smirked a bit as Clyde and Token cheered at the top of their lungs, letting out a sigh of relief before resting his hands on his knees as he hunched over. Holy FUCK you DID IT!
"Happy Holidays! I'm bisexual!" Tweek's heart stopped in his chest. His eyes widened, his hands grabbing onto one another as he stopped his clapping. WHAT?! He felt like he couldn't breathe. He couldn't even hear Token and Clyde's excessive cheering for their friend. He's your friend too! Be supportive! Nothing came to mind. No one could say anything. Finally, Craig skated over and opened the gates so everyone could come back on, but then he walked into the Zamboni tent, Token and Clyde rushing in to see him. Tweek was frozen in place, his hands shaking. He doesn't know why he's so surprised, so taken aback. He jumped as a hand was placed on his shoulder, whipping around to see Wendy.
"You okay?" She whispered, rubbing her hands up and town his biceps as if she was trying to warm him up. Tweek wasn't sure why, but he had tears on his cheeks. He went to speak, but found he couldn't. "Come on, let's go talk in your car." He nodded, giving her hand a squeeze as they walked to the parking lot.
The first thing Craig did when he went into the Zamboni tent was vomit. He didn't realize how nervous he actually was until it was over and he felt sick. Clyde and Token ran in as he tossed a paper towel into the trash can with a grimace.
"Dude…you weren't kidding when you said Craig Tucker style!" Token laughed, punching his arm. Craig laughed softly, plopping down into a chair. Kenny walked in slowly, a smile on his face.
"Man…you must feel…so good right now," He gave Craig a pat on the back. The only response Craig could give was a nod. He blinked as Kenny tugged him into a hug. "I'm proud of you, man." He whispered by his ear. Craig could feel the smile on Kenny's face. He let himself relax, his eyes closing.
"Thanks, Ken," his eyes shot open. "Wait!" he pulled away, looking at Clyde and Token. "Where's Tweek?"
"Talk to me." Wendy sat with him in the backseat of Tweek's car, a blanket on their lap. Tweek swallowed hard, looking at his hands.
"I…don't know why…I'm sad…because I'm not. I'm-I'm really happy for Craig." Wendy nodded slowly, humming.
"Maybe…you're just in shock. I mean, just yesterday you were one hundred percent convinced he was straight, but now here we are today and he's coming out to us." Tweek nodded, tugging the blanket up to his chin as he curled up under it.
"Yeah…I don't know, it…I just-"
"Feel like you got the short end of the stick?" Tweek's head shot up, looking at Wendy. "Think about it, you were so young when you came out to the school. You were thirteen. We all hadn't matured yet. Cartman punched you…" Tweek let out a sigh.
"Well…yeah. But…when he came out I just…reflected on when I came out…it just…threw me for a surprise." Wendy took his hand, giving it a squeeze.
"Everyone is still proud of you, Tweek. Don't think just because you simply said it at lunch one day versus how Craig just did it doesn't mean we don't think what you did was brave. Don't compare yourself to him, okay? I know you do that. I hate it when you do." Tweek let out a chuckle.
"I know Wendy, I-" a knock on the window interrupted them, both looking up to see Craig. Wendy smiled at Tweek.
"You two should talk," Tweek blushed but nodded, Wendy opening her side of the car door and stepped out. She threw her arms around Craig, Tweek watching as his arms wrapped around her. "Congrats, Craig…I'm-I'm really happy for you. And proud of you." She whispered into his ear. Craig smiled softly.
"Thanks, Wendy." He blushed as she kissed his cheek before rushing back to the rink, Craig sliding into the back seat and shutting the door. He swallowed hard as he pulled the blanket onto this lap.
"Hey." He practically whispered. Tweek's bottom lip quivered slightly.
"H-hey…," He swallowed hard, looking at his hands. "You…looked incredible out there." Craig laughed softly.
"Well…I was partly inspired by you." Tweek looked up at him, his cheeks turning a light pink.
"What?"
"Watching you…come out back then…and skate…I was so moved by you. Back in seventh grade when I was simply toying with the notion of my sexuality…it made me feel better knowing I wasn't literally the only guy who liked guys…well, in my case, both. But…you were so fucking brave that day and-and I promised myself that day that if I were to be gay, in any way, shape, or form…I'd want to do something bold and-and brave…just like you," Tweek sniffled and wiped a few tears that fell from his eyes. "And…watching you skate these past few weeks…knowing that I'm literally the only person besides your parents to know about this…it's been so special to me. I wanted…I wanted to make you proud, Tweek." Tweek opened his mouth to say something, but all that came out was a sob. He collapsed into Craig's arms, gripping at his shirt as he cried into his neck. Craig blushed, wrapping his arms around Tweek and rubbing small circles into his back. When Tweek pulled away, Craig cried out in pain as he slapped him across the cheek.
"You're such an a-asshole!" Tweek said through an angry laugh.
"What?! What did I do?!"
"I've been driving myself crazy d-day and night trying to figure out if you liked me! I-I had finally convinced myself that there was no way! You were soooo straight! You f-fucking hurt me bad yesterday, saying that that kiss meant nothing to you! 'Oh, it was all alcohol! Yup! Nothing else! C-Cause who'd ever like Tweek Tweak?!' That's what you practically s-said to me! You-fuck! You're so mean! Y-you know, I hate you sometimes! Y-your stupid smug face! You-you think you know everything, don't you?! You just think you're so smart!"
"Tweek."
"You think you're j-just so fucking cool! Mister Cool Guy over here!"
"Tweek!"
"No! L-let me fucking talk, dammit!"
"Tweek, listen!"
"No! Because you know what?! I-I had a fucking panic attack yesterday because I-I couldn't fucking stop thinking about you! I haven't had a panic attack all year! You wanna know what I figured out yesterday?! I like you! Okay?! I-I fucking like you! And-and even if you don't like me back, I got news for you, asshole! I fucking like-" Tweek yelled in surprise as Craig grabbed his face, forcing him to look at him. He locked eyes with him, his breathing rapid. Craig spoke after a minute of silence.
"Are you done?" Tweek growled, ripping his face away.
"Fuck you! That's your response?! I fucking pour my heart out and that is how you respond?!"
"Oh. Sorry. Let me try again." He grabbed Tweek's face again, ignoring Tweek's cry of frustration as he pressed his lips to his. He felt Tweek tense under his fingers, his thumb running over Tweek's cheek in an effort to relax him. After a moment or two, Tweek finally relaxed under his fingers, placing his hands on top of Craig's as they pulled apart. Craig couldn't help but notice how flustered Tweek now was, a small smile spreading on his lips.
"You feel better, buddy?" Tweek nodded, looking down.
"…sorry for getting so mad." He whispered, gasping as Craig tilted his chin up.
"Tweek…I'm sorry. I…I kinda have been leading you on…being flirty and-and purposefully trying to spend time with you…Tweek, I really…really like you. I-I have since, like, seventh grade, but didn't really realize it until this year. It just…it took some time to adjust to these feelings and I'm sorry I made you doubt yourself…you should do that less often." Tweek laughed softly, looking at his lap.
"I know…hey Craig?"
"Yes Tweek?"
"I'm so fucking proud of you."
The rest of the evening was slow due to the volume of kids who all left at once around nine. Craig said goodbye to his friends, shooting a quick wink to Tweek as he walked away with Token, Clyde, and Jimmy. Kenny and him quickly closed up so they could get home, the next few days being the first vacation they had in weeks (they both have off through the twenty sixth). Once they closed up and said goodbye, Craig started driving home, listening to the radio. What's Up? By 4-Non Blondes came on the radio, Craig letting himself really listening to the lyrics.
And so I cry sometimes
When I'm lying in bed just to get it all out
What's in my head
And I, I am feeling a little peculiar
And so I wake in the morning
And I step outside
And I take a deep breath and I get real high
And I scream from the top of my lungs
What's going on?
Craig didn't realize it until he pulled into the driveway, but he was crying. He was crying because he was happy. He could finally be himself, he could be Craig Tucker, the bisexual ice hockey player who was so smitten with his best friend. It just felt…so good. He got out of his car as the song ended and he practically ran into his house, grinning at his parents as they looked up at him from the couch.
"Craig, sweetie, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" his mother stood, grabbing his cheeks out of concern after he hung his coat up. Craig just grinned even wider, if that was even possible.
"M-mom I…I-I did it…I came out." He sobbed, grabbing his mother's hands. Laura Tucker immediately grinned, letting out a sob as she stroked her son's hair.
"Oh…Craig!" she tugged him into a hug, sobbing into his shoulder. Thomas tugged them both into a big hug, resting his cheek on Craig's open shoulder (Craig was much taller than his father) as he sniffled.
"Son…I'm so proud of you." He whispered, wanting only the two people in his arms to hear those words. Craig couldn't stop smiling. He was so happy. Tonight, Craig Tucker had admitted his feelings to his long-time crush. Tonight, Craig Tucker had come out of the closet. Tonight, Craig Tucker started a new, happier, lie free life.