Disclaimer: I do not own Prince of Tennis.

Lady Monozuki: Thank you to everyone who read and reviewed this story! It means a lot to me to receive them, and I enjoy reading each one. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Some glimmers of hope in here that will either make you like the story or hate it. I'm not sure. This chapter was kind of an emotional one.

With all of that being said, I am going to say that I am finding it extremely difficult to keep up with the number of stories I have going. Between them, plus work, and everything life seems to be dumping down on me, it's been hard to find time to write. So, in order to figure out which stories you are most interested in, I am asking you to review. I want you to review your favorite story of mine so I can determine an update schedule. The story/stories with the most reviews will be updated first, followed by the ones with the least amount of updates. I'm hoping to run a bi-weekly schedule. Popular stories the first week, less popular the second week. So, if this is your favorite story, please review!

Chapter Six: Confusion

Syuusuke trembled in Gen's warm embrace. It wasn't forceful or bruising, like the one he had experienced earlier, but the well-toned muscles were defined and powerful. They weren't unlike Tezuka's. The memory of being forced down surfaced, robbing him of rationality for a moment. But he didn't pull away. He kept telling himself that it was just Gen and that Gen wouldn't hurt him. Gen had saved him.

That thought alone broke away at the chains that tried to tie him down. This wasn't someone who wanted to hurt him, but help him. He buried his head in Gen's chest, inhaling deeply and letting the strong arms embrace him, protect him from his thoughts. His shaking quelled slowly allowing him to relax fully after a stretch of time. His former lover didn't do anything except hold him.

Syuusuke knew that he was being unfair by asking Gen to take on so much more responsibility. He knew just how emotionally taxing it was to have to deal with the situation, on top of Ryoma.

And now me.

He hadn't planned on relying on someone else, but it just happened. And seeing Ryoma open up to Sanada like that only made him feel better about asking Gen to help. No matter how hard he tried, he knew that he couldn't do this alone. Not with everything that had just happened.

"Thank you," he whispered into Gen's chest. "Thank you for being there."

He pulled away and looked up at Gen. He had always prided himself on being able to read past the masks that both him and Tezuka wore. Neither one of them could hide their emotions in his presence. But sometimes, he wished that he couldn't read the emotions and feelings. Because then he wouldn't see the pain and sadness inflicted upon the other. His heart clenched tight at the sight of the pain in Gen's eyes.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," Gen answered quickly. He could tell that the other had just given him a default answer, one that meant there was more to what the other was feeling.

"You don't have to lie."

There was brief silence. He could see Gen contemplating how to respond to his earlier question. He waited patiently, something that he also had to learn how to do with individuals that weren't very articulate.

"It hurts to be this close to you and still know that there is a barrier between us."

The words felt like they had punched him in the heart. He hadn't thought that this simple action could cause so much agony to the other person.

"What scares me most," Sanada continued in a whisper. "Is that the barrier might be there forever."

-Stand-

Ryoma wandered the streets nearby Syuusuke's apartment. He ignored the whispers and looks pointed in his direction as he did so. Everything was in a haze. Nothing made sense anymore. At least, not from his standpoint. All of this time, he had envisioned his former lovers as cold, heartless, and uncaring. After all, why else would they ignore him for so long without so much as batting an eye in his direction?

Why would they care now? They had plenty of time to see him, talk to him, love him, and even take care of him. What had changed in that short amount of time? He glanced at the direction of his wrists. They were covered so others couldn't see, but the dark cloth of his shirt was transparent to him. Underneath the fabric, he could see the lines that raked across his flesh.

It's because I tried to kill myself.

It was the only reason that they had put forth any effort into trying to help him. They were trying to pretend that they still cared. They were just trying to suck him back in, hoping that he would buy into every word that they said. What for?

So they can hurt me again.

He clenched his fists, angry at the thoughts. How could they think that he was going to believe that they had any good intention? How could he let himself get sucked back into hell? Hadn't he suffered enough by their hands? Or did they just want to see him succeed in his effort of killing himself? Ryoma stopped in his tracks.

They don't want you dead.

The gentle voice in his head broke through all of the anger and bitterness that he was feeding off of. It was a simple thought, one that seemed ridiculous, but also rang true. Why would they put forth any effort to be nice to him? They could have just left him in the hospital and mocked him in his consciousness until he finally gave in to their torment and killed himself in the end. But they were trying to be nice.

They were saying everything that he had wanted to hear what seemed so long ago, and gave him the attention that he needed. They were caring for his wounds, tending to his heart, paying attention to his needs.

They're good at this game.

The bitter voice was back. It cautioned him against the lies that they were feeding him, their fake personalities that they hid behind—everything.

You're being sucked in again. If they had really loved you, they wouldn't have treated you like they did.

Ryoma knew that the voice was right. He didn't deserve any of the treatment that he had received in a relationship. No one should ever have to endure what he did for the sake of love. It didn't make sense for people who claimed that they loved him to treat him in such a fashion. Which is why he found it hard to believe that they were treating him properly now because they actually cared about him

It was all a ploy to get him back to them so they could hurt him all over again. And no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't escape from them. No matter what he did, he was powerless against them. He couldn't stand up for himself or even tell them how he really felt about their disgusting actions.

Why?

Because I love them.

-Stand-

Atobe stared out the window of the library. Oshitari had long-since left, leaving him in his thoughts. He hadn't moved from his spot. He kept thinking of the different ways to try and win back everyone that he had lost. Every plan that he had formulated quickly crumbled. Everything was so unpredictable right now. The different emotional states that everyone was in threw a wrench in every plan that he had managed to come up with so far.

If this were business, it'd be a simple manner. But it isn't business. It's human lives that he would be messing with. He had already seen the result of what could be done when you drive someone to the breaking point. Now, he needed to opposite to happen. He needed to bring them to a place of healing, rest, comfort—things that weren't easy to accomplish.

Especially when they know how I've treated them before.

Targeting them as a group wouldn't do him any good. There wasn't enough personal time, enough communication, or enough contact to make a dent on all of the evil he had done to them. He would have to sway them one at a time. That was going to be the challenge of his lifetime. But if it meant that he could have them back, then he would gladly endure anything.

Ryoma and Syuusuke are going to be the most difficult.

But if he could convince Ryoma that he had changed and get Ryoma to fall in love with him, then maybe Syuusuke would soften to him and allow him inside once again. At least, that's what he hoped. It was never as simple as it sounded.

Atobe chuckled. Nothing about his former lovers had ever been simple. They were all so unique and different that it made their lives together so beautiful. If only he hadn't destroyed that picture.

With that thought, he stood. He was going to accomplish this task and make it happen. He was going to start with Ryoma. Atobe knew how he was going to get his youngest ex to talk to him too. He still needed to hear the rest of the story about what had happened in America.

-Stand-

Syuusuke felt his heart tug at the last words that Gen had spoken. He tried to think of some way to respond, to reassure his ex that it was not the case, but he couldn't. The future, for all of them, was unpredictable at this point. Even if he wanted to say the words, they wouldn't come out.

He tightened his grip on Sanada. If only he could promise that they would end up together at the end of the road. But he had promised Ryoma. He had made Ryoma his sole priority. And he was even failing at doing that, especially now. His heart was betraying him. He had sworn to himself that he wasn't going to even look at anyone other than Ryoma.

But Gen had been there for him when he couldn't even help himself. And now, he was at the mercy of his conflicting emotions. He looked up again, staring into Gen's eyes. They were hurt, but they were also clouded with tenderness and care. He raised his heels, standing on the tips of his toes as he had always done to kiss the taller man.

"Don't," Gen said in a strained voice. He stopped. "Don't kiss me if you're going to regret it later."

Realization of what he had been about to do washed over him. He pulled away quickly, freeing himself from Gen's hold.

"I'm sorry," he stammered. He saw the hurt return to Gen's eyes once again. A deeper hurt at his apology. He knew what he had done was terrible, but Sanada was right. He would have regretted the action. The silence between them was heavy. He didn't know what else to say or do.

Gen recomposed himself. "It's okay. I don't want any false hopes. It's hard enough being without you. I don't need to be strung along as well."

The words came out bitter. They cut at his heart.

"Please get some rest, Syuusuke. I'll see you tomorrow."

With those words, Gen left. Syuusuke slumped to the ground and sat there numbly. He had almost broken his promise. Tears began to fall.

-Stand-

Yukimura had glanced at the clock for the hundredth time that day. He knew that he had no control over how long Gen could stay out, but that didn't keep him from worrying. What if everything had gone wrong and they were just hurting each other even more? Sanada didn't deserve that. He had spent several years watching his friend suffer in silence, trying to mask the pain that they were feeling. But now that everything was out in the open, his friend had been left devastated.

It was painful to watch. There had been so much hurt, but always with a promise to love at the end. Once Sanada and his lovers parted ways, there was only sadness, bitterness, and hurt left from the relationship. There was no more promises. There was no one to clean up the mess. Not even he, who had known Sanada for longer his lovers, could do anything to quell the pain in his stoic friend's heart.

And to be honest, he never thought that he would see the day that Sanada would be so broken. He returned his attention to the food he was cooking, careful not to let it burn. He had made an extra portion, even though he didn't know if or when Gen would be arriving home. Yukimura took the pan off the heat and plated the dish.

He heard the door open. He smiled softly. It looked like Gen came home after all. Yukimura calmed himself and turned to see the stoic man stumble in. He was soaking wet from the rain outside—something that he had failed to notice. Sanada closed the door behind him. He walked over to Gen.

"How did it go?" he asked in neutral voice, hoping to conceal his overzealous curiosity.

He had barely reached the taller man when Sanada slumped down. He caught the other person, not minding getting wet in the process. Sanada lifted his face to meet his. Yukimura could see the pain and the sadness written on the expression. And desperation, longing, and desire. But those other feelings weren't for him—they were for one of his exes.

Even though he knew that, he felt his heart break. His best friend, the person that he had been in love with for a long time, would never return his feelings.

"I'm sorry," Yukimura whispered gently. He pulled the other man into a hug. Instantly, he felt Gen's arms wrap around him, holding on to him tight. He let Gen hold him for as long as he needed to. He wasn't going to let go.

-Stand-

Ryoma didn't know when the sun had turned into dark clouds, nor when the warm rays had turned to freezing droplets of rain. They were almost numb on his skin though. His thoughts had consumed him as he had stood still in the middle of a street. He only became aware of his surroundings when a man had bumped into him. In the blurred movement, he caught glimpse long brown strands of hair. A long, dark jacket, and a face with a jagged scar on the side.

His heart froze in fear. There was no way. He couldn't breathe in that moment. His mind brought forth the image of the lanky man who had kidnapped him in America. He blinked. The person didn't have a scar. And it was a woman. She apologized to him. He still stood there though, trying to separate reality from his past.

She reached out toward him and he panicked. He took a couple of steps backwards, trying to get away from the hand that wanted to grab him. He wouldn't let it. He didn't want to go back with that man. That man was in prison! How had he made it to Japan? Ryoma stumbled off the curb. His mind was still consumed with the nightmare from his past. All he could think about was getting away. He had to get away!

He didn't hear the honking of the horn, the screaming, or register the lights coming his direction. All he could hear was the voice saying that if he ran, they would kill him. It paralyzed him. He didn't want to die. Not yet anyway. He still had people who loved him.

Or did he?

What day was it? Where was he? How long had he been under their watch?

Something jerked him back to reality. He heard the screams and the blaring horn this time. Something heavy tugged him toward the sidewalk again. Ryoma's mind slowly began to reconnect with reality. His golden eyes searched for the person who had pulled him from the street. He saw a person with blue hair and glasses staring at him.

"I have already been to the hospital once today," the voice drawled. "I don't want to make a second trip."

He knew the voice from somewhere. The face was familiar too.

"Oshitari," Ryoma breathed out. Yes, that was the name.

"Good to see you, Echizen."

To be continued…