AN: Warning: Questionable Word. Thanks for the reviews, here is the next chapter.

Chapter 4: Changed his mind?

When Kevin reached the door to the break room, he stopped and observed Lizzie, who was still looking at a particular open file, and he also noticed her holding the necklace she wore, her most prized one, which was something she did a lot, especially when she was anxious, worried or nervous about something, and he couldn't help but think back to the first time he saw her so nervous she was doing that.

Flashback

12 years ago

(5 months earlier)

19 year olds Kevin and Lizzie was in her dorm room studying while her best friend Jennifer was out with a few other friends, and ever so often they would look up from their work and smile at one another shyly before they would look back down. They were just friends at the moment, but they liked one another, they just hadn't gotten around to confessing it yet.

After the third time of looking up, Kevin saw that she had her hand wrapped around her necklace, and was moving it side to side a little, so he asked with a smile. "Is there a reason you're doing that?"

She looked up from her work with a raised eyebrow and asked. "What?"

He nodded toward her hand that was around her necklace. "Playing with your necklace."

"Oh." She smiled as she removed her hand from it. "I wasn't aware I was actually doing it, it's a thing I do when I'm anxious, nervous, or upset about something."

When he raised an eyebrow at that, she realized she said too much, so she looks back down at her books with a worried look, making him get up from the desk chair he had been sitting on and walked towards the bed before sitting down next to her and whispered. "And what has you so nervous?"

She shook her head, trying to regain her composure while he was this close to her. "No-nothing." She then looked at him as she continued to try to steady her voice. "How do you know it's nerves?"

He gives her that smile that makes her heart race even more before he spoke softly. "I don't see how you would be anxious or upset about something, unless I did something, and if I had, I'm..."

She cuts him off as she shook her head. "You did nothing to upset me, I promise."

She went back to her books once again, her hand instinctively going to her necklace again as he spoke. "So, you're anxious and nervous, now the answer is why?"

She took a breath before looking at him once again. "Kevin, can we just for..."

He cuts he off this time as he placed his hand on top of other hand. "I'm nervous too."

Her eyes get a little wide as she asked. "You are, about what?"

He smiled as he squeezed her hand. "I think you know why. The feelings between us are becoming more than friendship, and wanting to transition that relationship can be
nerve-wracking, especially if you are unsure if the other person feels the same."

Knowing he was giving her an in, she replied with honesty as she moved her other hand from her necklace and placed it on top of his. "I feel it too." He smiled bigger, just as she spoke again after a sigh. "But are you sure you want to..."

He places his finger on her lips to stop her before cupping her cheek, making both hearts race as he whispered while moving closer to her. "I want to see what happens, do you?"

He stopped before his lips could touch hers so it would give her a chance to back away, and despite the reservations she had about changing their friendship into a relationship, she knew she couldn't go the rest of her life wondering 'what if' when it came to him, so for now she went with her heart and closed the gap between them, kissing him with everything she had, and he wasn't exactly holding back either, because despite on how he still felt about Nicole, he knew he couldn't spend the rest of his life pushing away new feelings he had for someone else.

When they finally pulled back, they placed their foreheads together while trying to catch their breaths, then once he had his back, he whispered. "May I?"

With the kisses still flowing through her and the confusion about his question, she asked breathlessly. "May you what?"

"Look at your necklace."

She smiled as she pulled back and held the end of her necklace toward him. "Of course."

He smiled in return and held up the end of it, seeing it was half a heart before looking at her with a raised eyebrow. "Should I be concerned on who has the other half of your heart?"

She chuckled before replying. "Only if you don't turn it around."

When he did, he realized it was a best friend heart, and she had the 'BE' and 'FRI' part of it, then he smiled as he removed his hand from the necklace. "Jennifer, I should have known."

She smiled as she slipped her fingers through his before asking in a serious tone. "I hope you're not too jealous about our friendship, we've been close since we were five years old, and she's always going to be my..."

Kevin cuts her off with a nod and smile. "I get it, I would never want to come between you two." He stopped and cleared his throat before finishing. "I just hope we get a little time to ourselves sometimes."

She nodded in understanding a she cupped his cheek. "We will, I promise. And I know she'll understand, she's the best friend anybody could ask for."

"Then I want to get to know her too."

That made Lizzie happy, nothing would be better in her eyes if her best friend and boyfriend became friends, so she smiled brighter. "Really?"

"Yeah." He placed his hand on top of hers and took it off his cheek before kissing it, then looked into her brown eyes and whispered. "She's important to you, so it's important to me."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

They kissed softly on the lips before they release one another so he could go back to the desk, then once he sat down they go back to studying, but once again they kept looking at one another, only this time their smiles and looks were more loving and a lot longer, like they couldn't wait to explore this turn of a new relationship a little more.

End of Flashback

Kevin mentally shook away his thoughts from the past before he cleared his throat while walking further in the room, noticing Malcolm wasn't in the room, but at the moment not really caring where he was at.

"Hey, my supervisor wanted me to give you this."

She removed her hand from her necklace and sat up straighter in her seat as she gave him a small smile while holding out her hand for the file, and once she had it, he asked with a concern look on his face. "You ok?"

She sets the file down on the table, and stands up, taking the empty coffee mug with her while clearing her throat before speaking softly as she headed towards the sink. "Yeah, I'm fine."

He turned around and walked up to her speaking softly. "I know you're not, and it's more than the case that's bothering you."

With her back still toward him, she shook her head, trying to control her emotions as she spoke again. "It's nothing. Besides I don't want to talk about it, and we shouldn't be talking about it."

"Why."

She felt a crack in her exterior and sniffled as she shook her head again. "Kevin, I..."

She gets cut of as he turns her around before asking with a frown. "Why did you leave?"

She sniffled again as she replied softly. "You know why, I couldn't han..."

He cuts her off again. "It's because you blame me, didn't you? You couldn't look at me anymore because you held me responsible for what happened to Jennifer."

She shook her head, and a tear finally rolled down her cheek as she whispered in return. "No, I never blamed you, I blamed myself. I was her best friend and all I wanted to do that night was being alone with you. I should have insisted harder that we take her back to the dorm room, or made sure she made it to any of our other friend's place, but I..."

She stops, a little shocked that his hand cupped her cheek as he finished with tears in his eyes. "We. We should have made sure she would really be ok, I blamed myself too, Lizzie."

She shook her head. "But..."

He cuts her off once again. "She was your best friend, and you were my girlfriend. I was suppose to make sure that nothing hurts you, but I failed you in the worst possible way, so I'm so sorry I let you down."

Seeing him with so much pain his in eyes made her heart break even more, so she cupped his cheek and wiped a tear off as she started to speak. "Kevin..."

But then she was cut off by another voice at the doorway, also making them immediately aware that maybe they shouldn't have been discussing this in the lab.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'll uh...I have to go."

Nicole then turned around and walked out of the room, and Lizzie removed her hand and stepped back, letting his hand fall from her cheek as she spoke. "Go after her, Kevin." She could see he was torn, but she didn't want him to regret not going after her, so she continued with a little more force. "Go."

He nodded with the look of concern still on his face before rushing out of the room while Lizzie closed her eyes as she tired to regain her composure, she was stronger than this, she had been trained to be stronger than this, but she always knew the only person who could break down those walls she tired to build up, was Kevin.

(Five Minutes earlier)

Not long after Kevin had left her office, there was knock on her door, so Sara smiled as she placed the photo back on her desk. "Come in."

The door opened a second later, and her smile widened when she saw her husband walk in, he smiled back before asking after clearing his throat. "You done for the day?"

Knowing there wasn't much she could do now, she nodded with a sigh as she closed a couple of the files she had opened before standing up. "Yeah, I can work on these tomorrow." He nodded in understanding, then she asked with the smile back on her face. "So, what do you have planned, Mr. Grissom?"

Wanting to touch her, but knowing he couldn't, he kept his hands to his sides before answering. "Oh, I don't know, Mrs. Grissom, maybe resting for a bit, then dinner out on the balcony before a nice calm boat ride."

Also wanting to touch him, but knowing she couldn't, she replied after a pause. "Or we can just relax and enjoy dinner on the boat before the ride."

He nodded with his eyes sparkling. "Alright, that works too. I'll meet you there."

"Ok, I'll bring the...Chinese?"

"That's fine, I'll see you later."

While both of their eyes continued to sparkle, she whispered. "Yeah you will."

They share one more loving look before he finally turned and walked out of the room while she sighed with content before she turned to her desk, moved the files to the side so there wasn't a clutter on her desk, then after grabbing her shoulder bag and coat, she turned the lights out of her office, walked out of it, and locked it before walking down the hall so she could leave, and spend time with her wonderful husband.

After finding Nicole in the locker room, Kevin walked up to her and sat down on the bench next to her and started to speak as he moved his hand towards hers. "Nicole I..."

But stopped his hand movement and words the minute he heard Devon, Mariah, and Tim talking as they walked into the room.

When the three of them saw Nicole and Kevin, their faces showed a little sadness as Mariah asked softly, hoping the rumors weren't true. "So is it true, Detective Wilson's daughter..."

She trailed off as Kevin nodded with a sigh. "I'm afraid so."

They all sighed this time and shook their heads, then after a pause, Tim smiled slightly as he opened his locker. "Although I'm sad that the FBI had to show up in the first place, I did see the woman agent in the break room, and all I have to say is, nice."

Mariah looked at Tim with a raised eyebrow before smirking. "Should I be informing Lindsey about her boyfriend?"

He chuckled while shaking his head. "Hey, nothing in the rulebook that says you can't look, it's touching that's frowned upon." Then he spoke in a more serious tone. "And I would never, she knows where my loyalties are."

They could see the truth in his eyes, but Mariah couldn't help but smirk one more time as she pushed a finger to his chest. "And it better stay that way, or I won't hesitate telling on you, you got that mister."

He raised his hands up in surrender with a nod and smile. "Yes, ma'am."

She nodded in satisfaction, and as they were finishing up on getting their things, Devon spoke. "I know after the case you guys had you might not be up to it, but how about a drink on me."
Then he smiled as he finished while looking at his girlfriend. "Because I mean after all, there is something to celebrate, my girl did get a promotion today."

She smiled in return while Kevin and Nicole both cleared their throats before Kevin replied first. "I'm sorry man, but how about a rain check." Then he looked at Mariah. "I hope you understand."

Mariah nodded. "Of course, whenever you want."

He stood up and walked up to her before giving her a hug and whispering in her ear. "Congratulations though, you earned it."

She ran her hand up and down his back as she replied. "Thank you."

When they stepped back, Nicole personally congratulated her too, then after Tim, Devon, and Mariah closed their lockers, they said goodbye/goodnight to Nicole and Kevin before walking out of the room.

Once it was just the two of them again, they looked at one another before he started to speak. "Nicole I..."

But was once again cut off when Grissom had walked in the room, and after a short pause, feeling the tension between them, he headed towards his locker to get his things without much delay, then after he closed the door, he gave them a nod before walking back out.

When they were alone again, she spoke this time. "We shouldn't be talking about this in the lab anyways. You remember what Sara said."

He nodded then asked. "Where?"

"My house." Before Kevin could respond, she continued. "Carson's with his grandmother tonight."

"OK, I'll meet you at your place."

After she nodded in return, they grabbed their items from their lockers before walking out of the room one after the other, both a little nervous on how this conversation was going to go.

At Nicole's House

"You want something to drink?"

Kevin replied as he shook his head while stepping inside the house. "No thank you, I'm good."

Nicole nodded in return before walking towards the couch, which he followed her and they both sat down in silence for a few seconds, then she spoke softly after clearing her throat. "Have you changed your mind about us?"

Kevin immediately shook his head and placed his hand on top of hers. "It's always been you, and it always will be."

She looked at him with confusion before shaking her head. "But I saw the look you two shared, Kevin, you loved her."

He nodded. "You're right, I can't lie and tell you that there has never been any one else other than you that I ever loved in my life." He paused before he sighed as he continued. "But despite how much I felt about her, deep down I always knew she wouldn't be my 'one and only', but what else was I suppose to do? pine away for you forever without ever knowing how love feels like? She may have never been the true one, but she was a great one."

Then she started to ask without even thinking. "But how can you love two..."

She trails off when she realized what she was going to stay, and he removed his hand while speaking with a sad look on his face. "If you don't know that answer to that, then what am I doing here?" She was about to speak, but he continued with emotion. "Like I said before, I get it. Jason is the love of your life, I would never, could never, take his place in your heart, but if there is no room for you to love me in that way, then what are we doing? Do you just want me around so you don't have to feel lonely, because if that's the case, I rather just be your friend for that."

He stood up and walked to the window as Nicole spoke with tears in her eyes. "That's not true, I do feel something for you."

He closed his eyes for a second and turned around to look at her with pain them before asking. "I know you do, but you're still hesitating on telling me what exactly that is, why?"

She looked into his eye. "I don't..." She trials off and shook her as she looked down at her hands. "I don't know."

He sighed as he walked up to her again, then after sitting down on the coffee table, he leans forward and places his hands on top of hers again before whispering. "I think you do, and until you're honest with yourself and me, we are still going to be in the same place as we are now, and as much as I love you and want to be with you, I...we can't stay like this forever, we either need to more forward together or let go and go our different directions."

It broke his heart telling her that, but he couldn't stay in limbo forever.

Nicole sniffled as she looked up into his eyes before whispering with emotion. "I don't want to lose you again."

He gave her a smile and cupped her cheek with one hand before replying. "You'll never lose me, especially as a friend." He then removed his hand from her cheek as he finished. "But you need to decide what you want, if I'm the man that you really see in your future, at least in that way." He stands up, taking his hand away from her before kissing her on the top of her head and whispering with his eyes closed, feeling the pain in his heart. "I love you Nicole, and I always will, remember that."

He pulled back and she looked up him, seeing the pain and truth in his eyes, then after a pause he gives her a small smile as he continued. "I'll see you tomorrow." All she did was nod while her heart was screaming at her as she watched him walk towards the front door and out of the house.

As the door clicked shut, she placed her head in her hands and shouted. "Dammit." Before crying in them, she really knew why she was hesitating, she was just too afraid to admit it out loud.

AN: More coming soon. Please Review.