Neither of them found much luck falling back to sleep. Especially not after what'd just happened. They'd force their eyes closed, turn a little bit, and find themselves wide-eyed and awake. The cycle would repeat a few times before they felt like they were going crazy.
The physical tiredness was enough to keep them in bed, though. It wasn't like they could just get up and do whatever. They were completely exhausted emotionally and mentally, so the willpower to get out of bed just wasn't there. So they did the next best thing, and just talked. Chatted and conversed about life. Trying to dig up more about each other outside of everything that they already knew. There wasn't much. They already knew almost everything there was to know about each other. But they tried anyway.
For what, though? Nothing better to do at the time? They could argue that, of course. But deep down…they knew that after their impending journey, and by the time the sun would set in 16 hours from then, complete change was in the cards. They knew that nothing could be same by the time everything was set and done.
Mitsuha squeezed Taki as hard as she could, and pressed herself against him with all her might. "Taki-kun…"
"Yeah…"
"I'm…I'm scared…"
The old 'everything's gonna be okay' like wasn't going to work this time. He just didn't know. He would've been a liar to say he knew how to fix everything, and keep everything in check. It also would've been cruel of him to assure something to her, only to have everything fall apart. That's the situation they were in.
They were dreams, though. Visions and apparitions of that which you don't believe can be real. Dreams aren't supposed to come true, at least if you don't make them happen yourself. But all the evidence to prove otherwise was smack dab in the middle of their memories. There was no way to prove to anyone that they switched bodies for two weeks, but it happened anyway. They only had each other to validate so. That being said, the same miracle that brought them together, and fostered all of this joy and happiness, could very easily tear them apart.
That's why it scared them so terribly. There's no other reason they would be together. But they loved each other. Dearly. There wasn't really anybody to thank for this predicament. Dear God, they were gonna milk every last minute of it they could. Neither of them would really know what to do without the other.
"Mitsuha…you know I'd fight to my dying breath to be with you…I have no idea what lies ahead of us. I'm just as scared as you are. But rest assured, I would push all of my capabilities to the extreme to stay by your side…"
The lump in Mitsuha's throat wasn't going to let her say anything, as if she had anything in mind to respond with anyway. It shouldn't be a surprise that such a quiet girl like her would be one to let actions speak for her. So she leaned into Taki and kissed him.
No one ever makes anything out of getting dressed in the morning. It's a basic routine that everyone does just to do it. There wasn't anything about it that would make it special.
Maybe that's why it meant so much to Taki and Mitsuha, then.
The train station was close to empty this early in the morning. The coffee could only do so much to keep them awake. Taki had been on this journey before. Mitsuha went on one herself, only in the reverse direction. Plenty of sentiments to be had here, but it wasn't quite the time and place for them. Despite being 5 years ago, Taki could retrace every single step he took on his first time vividly. Pretty much like it happened yesterday. So he couldn't help but draw parallels. And yes, there was some nostalgia and some common points between today and 5 years ago. But the clear and obvious difference this time around gave him mixed feelings about this whole trip.
He spent most of the commute urging Mitsuha to get as much sleep as she could. She would try, but at the end of the day, there was just too much anxiety to relax at all, let alone fall asleep. Part of them wanted the train rides to last forever, but they knew there had to be a bottom to this. And the pressure to get to it was mounting.
But if you were to ask them, they probably wouldn't even have a definite idea of why they were traveling to Itomori at the crack of dawn. The real reason would just sound crazy, but they themselves weren't even sure if it was why altogether. Perhaps the fear of being separated scared them enough to go out, and see if there's anything that would relieve them at all.
Sure. Let's go with that…
They got awfully lucky finding a cab driver that would take them out to the wasteland that was formerly Itomori. Getting out of the car felt all too familiar to Taki, but Mitsuha wouldn't have known, really. The two perspectives of which Taki and Mitsuha saw the scene before them for the first time contrasted to a fair level of fascination, actually. Taki seeing it from the top of the perch against Mitsuha being right in the middle of it. Memories of their respective fateful days replayed instantly, and both were awestruck with the magnitude of what had happened. Taki got a little choked up, because it was in that spot where he slowly felt his first memories of Mitsuha disappear. Her memos on his phone began to vanish, and he struggled to even remember her name eventually. For Mitsuha, seeing her home town destroyed wasn't easy. Remembering it just brought back unpleasant feelings.
So many years had passed by, but everything looked exactly the same. At least how it did after the meteor. Perhaps the former town's own anonymity was what preserved its aesthetic qualities more than anything. What reason would anyone have to come out here, and who other than its former citizens and those who witnessed it firsthand would have even known about Itomori at all? Maybe it was for the better. Because it made it that much easier for Taki and Mitsuha to remember where to go.
Thankful for their journey up Mount Takao, they traversed the rocky path rather easily. The two had a lot to say, and a lot on their mind, but anxiety more than anything muffled them and withheld whatever thoughts they had to themselves. Taki wanted to say something, then Mitsuha wanted to say something, the whole trip to the center of the crater was a miscommunicated mess. Understandably so, though. Neither of them had any reason to be mentally 100%.
Eventually, the trek was over. And before them was the cave. Yes, that cave. The cave where Mitsuha had laid down the key for Taki to tremendously alter reality, shift timelines into a more gratuitous fate. Taki remembered how confused he was at himself for coming all the way out here. In fact, he remembered being a little frustrated at how much time he must've wasted. It didn't take long for a change of heart to take place, though. Looking over at Mitsuha, he would've easily done all of it again for her.
And it overwhelmed him a little bit, so he grabbed her and held her tight. Whatever premonition told her why he was doing so, she didn't care. She knew, and comforted him accordingly. She again took a moment to soak in this vulnerability that Taki was showing. He'd never been this emotional, for any reason, ever. She understood his pride, and knew there would be very, very few more moments where he would just be putty in her arms like this. Perhaps this one even being the last one, who knows?
After he regained his composure, Taki took her over to the small creek that surrounded the cave. The one they had each crossed enough times to know how to conquer it. He hunched over, hands on his knees and turned back to Mitsuha.
"Come on, now. Get on."
"What?"
"I'm not letting you walk in the water. Hop on my back, I'll take you across."
Mitsuha was ready to cry from Taki's sweetness. But she didn't want to keep him waiting, so she piggybacked him, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his body. Out of all the times she'd ever hugged Taki, this was brand new. Why wouldn't she let it sink in a little bit?
She could've practically fallen asleep on Taki's back, that's how relaxed she was. But getting closer to the cave inspired new alertness, and she didn't want to miss what could be coming. Their hearts pounded faster and faster with every step they took towards the cave. For what? They probably didn't even know either. And as a matter of fact, every step towards the cave generated a greater confusion and uncertainty. At the climax of the journey, why were they all of the sudden so obscured as to what their entire motive was to come out here? Searching for answers? To see if anything was in there that would give answers?
How about all of the above…sure.
The cave was pretty deep, so it felt like forever by the time they got to the end. And everything was pretty much the same. The little shrine, and the one left bottle of kuchikamisake belonging the Yotsuha. Everything seemed pretty normal. Except…another bottle of saliva sake. And just like the other bottle, the writing on it was slightly worn by collecting dirt of the years. But thankfully it hadn't completely worn away the writing, as it did with Yotsuha's. So Mitsuha picked it up, and rubbed away the dirt with her thumb, only to read:
Taki
A third bottle of kuchikamisake. One unopened, one consumed, and one unaccounted for until now. Left by the only other person who had been in here since that day. Taki.
"T-…Taki-kun?"
At a complete loss for words, Taki just stared at this mysterious vial. With his name inscribed on it. Having no recollection of ever producing this. Of course there wasn't anything that the contents would reveal. Or would it…
If anyone were to ask Taki what went through his head over the next few seconds, he would never have an answer. But he put the bottle with his name on it down, reached over and picked up Yotsuha's, uncapped it and drank it.
"Taki?! Why would you do that?"
And momentarily, Taki's eyes opened wide…and then he passed out. Normally, Mitsuha would've began to freak out and panic beyond all hope of recovery. But…the reason they came on this journey tied into what inspired them in the first place. Strange things happen. Some for the better, some for worse, and being the cave mysteriously helped her understand that right away. She didn't know why, but she was eerily calm. And not worried about his well-being at all. There wasn't any way she could know what exactly was happening to him, but the overwhelming feeling of him undergoing a dream made too much sense in her head for her to dismiss. So she sat back down. And patiently waited for him to return to the real world.
Which didn't take long. A few seconds later, Taki woke up in a panicked gasp. His head darted around, as he reoriented himself, and when his eyes landed on a confused Mitsuha, he quickly reached over to his kuchikamisake bottle, and frantically gave it to Mitsuha.
"Mitsuha! Drink this! Please drink this, you have to see what I saw!"
The tone in his voice made her very hesitant. It was morbid, and uninspiring to say the least. Needless to say she was absolutely terrified at what Taki could've seen. Why else would he be in this state of mind? But not doing so would defeat the whole purpose of coming out here. So she unceremoniously opened the bottle of saliva sake, only 3 years less spoiled than the one he'd just drank. And quickly gulped it down. Before she could even register the taste in her brain, she got very dizzy, and her vision started to become impaired, and the feeling of hallucination enveloped her as colors and light obfuscated her visual perception further and further. The last thing she felt before drifting into wherever was Taki wrapping his arms around her. After that she was gone.
Taki noticed that not a whole lot of time had passed during his dream. Or any time, for that matter, it'd only been a few seconds. So he didn't even bother to sit and get comfortable because he knew Mitsuha would be right back in a matter of time.
And what do you know, she did. Part of him was expecting her to be bawling, but deep down, the reaction he got from her didn't surprise him at all. He pushed her away slightly, so he could look in her eyes. And contrary to what he might've imagined, he was met with a look of acceptance. Sadness, yes. Grief, yes. But above all, contention and acceptance. Mitsuha looked away, knowing there wasn't much to say between her and Taki. So she just leaned forward, allowing herself to fall into Taki's arms. She knew there would be plenty of time to cry very soon.
They came through the mouth of the cave rather inconspicuously, almost tentative to even come outside. Probably a little shaken from what'd just happened. Just over yonder was the rim of the crater they were standing in. And somewhere along its circumference was the very spot they met for the first time. A moment of very mixed feelings. The jubilation of meeting each other was, for lack of a better word, awesome. They'd grown so fond of each other without having ever met, so meeting for the first time proved to be a very emotional moment for both. And their friendship hardened in an instant. Laughing and teasing each other like childhood friends, mere minutes after seeing each other in person for the first time.
Part of them wished they had more time with each other. Really, all they were afforded as far as time went was pleasantries and a dire warning from Taki that the meteor was going to destroy Itomori. That was it. Oh, but then there was something else too. Perhaps the most horribly botched exchange of names ever. The intention was to mark each other with their names, so that they wouldn't forget. It didn't exactly work out that way.
So much emotion tied to this one spot. So much of their relationship, so much of what made them happy in the present time. It would've been foolish to come all the way out here, and not hold each other at the top of the crater the way they never got to 5 years ago. Of course, it would've been impossible to recreate the same moment, with the same implications and circumstances, and the same emotional atmosphere. Neither of them had any intention to try, though.
Taki helped Mitsuha up to the top, and the view they were met with was both familiar and somewhat obscure. It was quite nice, actually. The second crater had turned into a rather lively pocket of fauna and plants and stuff. Like a wide open pasture or meadow of sorts. Much like the one where the Miyamizu shrine sat. Very little indications of civilization here, apparent only to those who knew so already.
Mitsuha wasn't here to dwell in the past, though. She turned to Taki, and turned him toward her.
"Taki-kun…we've…never really had a proper introduction…have we?"
"Well, we didn't exactly meet in a proper way, either! But…I know. We've never shaken hands, even formally introduced ourselves…"
"I'm fine with the way we did greet each other when we met in the end, though. Wouldn't trade that moment for anything. But…you're right. We never…you know…"
"Then…" Taki cleared his throat quickly. "Hi! I'm Tachibana Taki. Pleased to meet you!"
She didn't think he would take that seriously at all. But appreciated the gesture nonetheless.
"I'm…hehe…Tachibana Mitsuha…pleased to meet you as well…"
She fell into his arms, allowing his presence to wrap around her and take her away. In the same spot she met the love of her life for the first time, she rested easy, unable to think of a place she'd rather be.
All in all, getting up early in the morning to take the trip paid off, because by the time they got back to the train station, it was still pretty much early afternoon. Not too much of the day had been sacrificed. Well, 'sacrificed' probably wouldn't be the right word. Maybe 'spent'.
And the train back to Tokyo felt quick, and they got back before they even realized it, almost missing the stop to get off. Still, it was a nice time to just hold each other, as they snuggled close on the train, again afforded the privacy of a near empty train. Despite their affection and how close to each other they were, neither of them could actually read each other's minds. That would be strange. But close to nothing was said verbally the entire ride back. What was there to talk about, honestly? Their minds were in different places, and either of them could've been accused of being a bit curious as to what the other was thinking.
They spent their time on the train recounting. In different ways, but in many others, similarly as well. Taki tried his best to remember everything that he saw in Mitsuha's body. The results were…interesting. Although the tangible perception of his time in Itomori was foggy, hazy, and overall clouded by the time and experiences that had passed, the impact of every single moment still sat fresh in his brain. After all, a lot of what he went through as Mitsuha shaped how he goes about doing things in his present. Of course something that impactful wouldn't be hard to remember. Slowly be surely, he remembered the exact moment he fell in love with Mitsuha. He wasn't honest with it. In fact, he vehemently denied it, but there was nothing to hide. A lot of happy memories, yes. None more impactful than the one where he and Mitsuha reunited at the staircase. But. Because of what he saw in the cave not too long ago, he only felt worse. Like he could've done more. Like he was responsible and the culprit for all this sadness.
Mitsuha's own comeuppance replayed like a movie in her head. Growing up in a rural town with such a limited population. Feudal and traditional lifestyles held onto by the neck. Having a happy family, and watching it dissolve after her mother passed away. And the subsequent years, and how her family shaped up to be from there on out. And then Taki. Her own flesh and blood. Blood is thicker than water, yes, but she had more than enough reason to consider Taki her own family. After all, it wouldn't be too long (hopefully, that is) until they were husband and wife. And starting a family of their own. But it was because of all of that, because of everything that's happened with Taki that she felt even guiltier over everything that happened with her real family. Like she didn't do enough. Because nothing was going to be the same anymore.
When they got to what was now considered Yotsuha's house, the mood was…strange. Somber, morbid, and just sad overall. But maybe unsurprisingly, there was a lot of relief in there. A lot of acceptance.
"Would you believe us if we said we got to talk to her one last time before she passed?"
"Honestly? I…I think I would. What did she say to you?"
"It was…really touching, actually. I guess long story short, she just wished us a happy life going forward, and granted us her blessing. But I guess the most important thing was that she was at peace. And could rest easy knowing we all turned out pretty okay."
"Yeah…you guys'll take care of me, right?"
"Absolutely…"
"So how did…you guys, I guess, talk to her?"
"Well…it's honestly a really long story. We'd…probably have to start from the very beginning, wouldn't we, Taki-kun?"
"Yeah. Nothing would make sense without the entire context. I mean, I still have trouble wrapping my head around it to this day."
As curious as Yotsuha was, she wasn't about to get into storytime for an hour. Especially not with what just happened. But still, she wanted to know how both of them were possibly able to contact her in her last moments. In some odd sense, everything going on was crazy to the point where…it almost made sense. Nothing about any of their lives were normal, so why would they take exception to something like this? For all they knew, Hitoha could still be alive spiritually. None of them were going to pretend they knew how any of that worked, but there was, honestly, literally no other explanation for such a phenomenon. Or any of the previous ones, for that matter. You're not supposed to be able to talk to the dead. Yet they did.
"So. Here's what happened. Yotsuha. Are you ready?"
"The fact that you ask me that makes me not so ready anymore…"
"Well…we actually went back to Itomori this morning."
"Really? How early did you have to get up?"
"Pretty early, but that's not really the point. You see, Taki and I have been having these…nightmares. These brutal, horrible nightmares. So horrific that there wasn't any possible way we could have these dreams coincidentally or naturally. Well…actually, they weren't really that bad. But they were trippy. And they were very strange. And we seemed to have almost identical dreams in the same night. So…we went out the Itomori, thinking we could find some sort of answer."
"What made you think you would find one out there? Like, what would Itomori have to do with you guys having these dreams?"
"Now that we think about it…we don't know. We honestly have no idea what we were thinking going all the way out there, and why we thought somehow there'd be a way to stop these dreams from happening out there. But…it worked out. We found out why…"
"Well, then…what is it? And what does this have to do with Obaa-san?"
"Before I say anything…just know that everything I'm about to say is 100% true. It's gonna sound really stupid, to be honest."
"Nothing up to this point has sounded very reasonable anyway. Let's be clear."
"So then it shouldn't be a whole big surprise when I say that…Obaa-san's dementia…wasn't a coincidence. And it wasn't a totally natural occurrence, like she didn't develop that from old age. So…over time, Obaa-san had gradually melded her mind and body with the spiritual realm. As more and more of her consciousness shifted into this other world…she lost touch with her body in this world. Over time, she became increasingly out of touch with her corporeal body. What came off as Alzheimer's disease and dementia and all that actually turned out to be her spirit leaving her body. So eventually, when her presence in the spiritual realm became strong enough, she became able to oversee those closest to her. And as such…influence our dreams."
"So you're telling me Obaa-san created those dreams for you two."
"Sounds crazy, right? I mean honestly, that just sounds so ridiculous, right? But…I believe in what I saw…and so do you, Taki-kun, right?"
"I do. So then she told us that she created those dreams…kinda as a test. A message, in a sense. I don't know what she told Mitsuha…but witnessing something that felt so real…and so close to home…the fear of losing each other was the strongest forge of bravery and responsibility for one another. But only if we had a strong enough relationship…"
Taki looked over at Mitsuha, who nodded her head in concurrence. Hitoha's words to him hit deep. Now all of the sudden he gained a feeling of responsibility for Mitsuha's well-being much, much stronger than the one he had before, if it was even possible. She was his absolute blood and soul, anything that would happen to her would devastate him. And he knew she felt the same way about him, too.
"What she said to me was very heartwarming. That she couldn't be happier that I was the one who ended up with Mitsuha. She didn't think there was anyone in the world who would love her more than I do, and I believe that to be absolutely true."
"So with that being said…Yotsuha…we can stay with you…for however long you need. In fact, we want to be here with you, so that you won't be alone."
Yotsuha wasn't used to this kind of emotion. She tried so hard to uphold this veil of composure and cool, but given the magnitude of the situation, it was pretty much impossible. She pulled Mitsuha and Taki in for a big group hug. The kind that happy families do. Yotsuha would've been a hypocrite to say that having emotions for her family wasn't cool. The relief of having her sister, and honestly her brother in spirit by her side eased a lot of the pain. Despite everything her personality and body language would suggest, she loved her grandmother beyond what she could describe. But every time she was with Mitsuha and Taki, she was exceptionally happy. Every second she'd spent with them had been a cherished memory. All that in spite of the realistically little time she'd spent with Taki. But as the old saying goes, it's quality over quantity. Every time. There were no two other people in the universe she'd rather be taken care of by.
"Everything's gonna be okay, Yotsuha…"
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A/N: So that's how I chose to have Hitoha go out. And honestly, I'm at peace with it. I wasn't quite happy with how I portrayed her in earlier chapters, so hopefully this one did her some justice. I realize my take on spiritual connections with the overworld and the limitations of spirits in their ability to communicate with the ethereal realm is probably farfetched, even for a fantasy SoL fic, and I realize this sentence is extremely long. Lemme know any of this didn't make sense so I know for the future.
Speaking of which, YES IT'S BEEN TWO MONTHS I KNOW AND I'M SORRY! Seriously, I am very very sorry. Gonna tickle my ego a little bit here, but I openly acknowledge that there are some of you who look forward to these chapters and give it a lot of love and support, and I do feel pretty bad that I don't uphold my end of the bargain. But the past two months have been pretty busy, and there just wasn't a whole lot I could do about it. So with that being said, the regular schedule should resume as of the posting of this chapter. Oh, who am I kidding, there was no regular schedule. But there definitely won't be a two month gap between chapters anymore, that's for sure.
So the end of the fic should probably give a pretty good idea of where this story is headed. Their lives are changing, and now our beloved couple has a new challenge ahead of them. But that doesn't mean what happens from here on out should be predictable by any means. There's still gonna be surprises around every corner. I think that, if anything, has been the one thing that's made my fic any good.
So that's it from me this time. And now here is the section where I try to extend my thanks and appreciation to you, my incredible audience, in a way that doesn't sound forced. Frankly, that's just a limitation of text that I've come to accept. But the very idea of someone taking the time to read my story keeps me going.
Also, a huge welcome to anyone new to the story. I see that there's quite a few new readers since the last time I uploaded a chapter, so again, welcome, everyone! I promise two months is not how long it normally takes for me to write a chapter, it's just Thanksgiving and Christmas came along and school and AUGH! Also, a huge thank you to everyone that helped get this fic to a crazy milestone (crazy to me) of 80 favorites and 90 follows. I can't even believe that's how far this fic as come. I mean, honestly, I got excited when I had 8 favorites and 9 follows. Unreal.
Shoutout of you're still reading. I'm a much less interesting individual in comparison to the story, so the rambling has probably gotten out of hand at this point. Until next time, y'all. Cheers.