For about two days after Sasuke's departure to the US, Naruto's bags under his eyes were appearing again. Not only couldn't he sleep at night, he also had to battle his emotions of seeing Sai struggling for his cancer. It pained Naruto seeing Sai while he battled the pain he felt the leukemia had caused. Naruto had to inject the man to sleep and he would be awake only in the morning and at night.

"It's… getting closer…" Sai croaked from where he laid.

It was already night time and was about time for him to take some rest.

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

Sai looked up and sent Naruto a weak smile. "My exhibition. I need to… call Hana to take care of something…"

"Oh… do you want me to call her now?"

Sai shook his head. "I will car her after I arranged few things. Do you think I could be out from here tomorrow? Just for a day… I want you to… be my model. Maybe for the last time…"

"Don't say that…"

"Well?"

"I am willing to be your model but… Do you think you have the energy to go out? I can't seriously recommend you to go out when you could barely manage to hold on to… ugh." Fuck his eyes stung. He couldn't finish that sentence seeing Sai's weak smile.

"Pretty please, Naruto? I don't have much time left for the exhibition, and I want a painting of you will be displayed at there."

"Umm…"

"Come on, dickless…"

Naruto was hesitant but he couldn't say no to people, especially Sai.

"When are we going?"

Sai smiled.

~o0o~

"Tell me if you can't hold back the pain or something." Naruto told the pale guy that was sitting on the wheel chair he was pushing. He already packed the necessary things on his backpack just in case. He had talked to Tsunade about this. She had warned at him first about it being risky, but she was the only one who had battled with her own reasons, thinking that Sai's leukemia was on the final stage. He could pass away at any moment, and things along the way that made Naruto breaking down. Tsunade eventually agreed on doing so, and trusted Naruto about it.

Naruto received a nod. They were still on the hospital, going their way down to the parking lot. Sai could still walk but it'd drain his energy down pretty fast. To save it, Naruto chose to put him on the wheel chair.

The two left the place with a cab, since neither of them brought their car.

~o0o~

"I will paint you and put my work in the exhibition." Sai announced when they had finally made it inside Sai's studio.

"Huh? Don't you think it's too much?" Naruto replied absent-mindedly as he put down the backpack he was carrying and began preparing necessary things for his patient.

Sai shook his head.

Naruto nodded his head, more likely to the necessary things he had prepared for Sai if something were to happen on the table nearby. The doctor smiled in satisfaction before he looked at Sai. "Where do you want to be?" Naruto said, referring to which position Sai wanted him to put his wheelchair on.

"Here is fine."

Naruto nodded again. "What about me? Where do you want me to…?"

"You can sit there on the sofa. But, I think I might need you in certain position in certain wardrobe if you are willing? I won't force you…" Sai trailed off. He wasn't sure if Naruto would agree to this but might as well try?

"I can manage." Naruto flashed a reassuring smile.

Sai nodded. "There is a white sheet on that cabinet," Sai said as he pointed at the location of the cabinet that was standing on the far end of the room.

Naruto nodded and went to retrieve the sheet before he came back standing in front of Sai, giving the material to him. "And?"

Sai asked Naruto certain things like grabbing the cover that was covered on the white sofa, the canvas, and the necessary things for the artist.

When everything was set, Sai continued. "You might not be agreeing to this but… I need you sprawling on that sofa, naked, with only that white sheet covering your crotch area."

Naruto shrugged and began undressing. He found that there was no harm on it as he stripped his clothes off in front of his boyfriend. He positioned himself on the white sofa, sprawling –as he was told- and put the white sheet to his crotch area.

"Do you want me to pose for certain style?" Naruto asked the artist who was getting ready to paint.

"Hang your left leg and left arm on the floor, and rest your right hand on your head, make it like you were resting without no problem in the world. Think yourself as a carefree person. But don't put too much pressure on your leg that was on the floor."

"Like this?"

Sai nodded with a smile, satisfied seeing Naruto did as he was told. "Exactly. Now you can close your eyes and rest. It'll take a while."

Through closed eyes, Naruto hummed. "Just tell me if you need anything." He informed the artist and in an instant he drifted off to sleep.

~o0o~

"I have found him."

"Huh?"

"Sakura… I need you to help me."

Sakura worried her bottom lip, staring at the man in front of him, unsure of what to say next. "It's not possible." That was what she could think of. It wasn't possible for someone to disappear for about seven years and just out of the blue, he reappeared again.

"You are kidding me."

"That's the same response of me when someone told me that they saw him."

"Why would he? Of all time, why now?"

"He is amnesia."

"He what?"

"It's a long story and I don't need to explain it to you."

"It's your fault, Sasuke, not mine. You caused this. You-"

"I know... I am suffering from the knowledge of that and I don't need you to remind me."

"And why, of all time, you choose now to meet me?"

"As I said before, that I need you to help me."

"To help you with what? I was suffering for the past few years as well, thinking that I was also the cause of him disappearing… because of your stupidity, Sasuke… I lost both of my best friends…"

"I'm sorry…"

Sakura took a deep breath. She couldn't bring herself to remember of when was the last time she thought of herself to be in this kind of situation, or she could have never thought about it? "After that night, I tried to call him but he never picking up his phone. It only last for a few hours and then his phone went out of reach. I tried to send him texts to say that it was a misunderstanding. Not only that, the first week I kept calling him but his phone was no longer reachable. I tried emailing him, but no response. I was so frustrated by it, I also tried to look for him. But when I got nothing, I decided to move out of Japan, just so I could start a new life. Sasuke, you have no idea what I went through every day, wondering where he could be, what he was doing, what could have happened if that night never happened… What could go right when-"

"Enough, Sakura."

"You have no idea how I want to slap you right now so bad you'd go coma for days, hell, maybe months, just to express myself of that night just how messed up you made our lives be."

"If it could make you satisfied, then do it."

Sakura shook her head. "You are too stupid… That's why Itachi calls you foolish, doesn't he?" Sakura whispered, pitied their lives for what had become. "It can't be helped. It was done."

The two fell into a pregnant pause before Sakura spoke up. "So… how is he?"

Sasuke talked to her what had happened and it left Sakura a few gasps. The information was too much for her to handle.

"So, do I have to… explain? I think I can't go back again… I feel too ashamed to see him directly after what had happened."

"I know what we have to do…"

"Not gonna happen…"

Sasuke raised his eyebrow in confusion.

"You haven't answered my question."

"What question?"

"Why do you want me to explain the reason to this problem to him? It'd happened, it's done. All you can do now is start all over again."

"That's what I thought at first. But Sakura, he's bound to get his memories back. I just want to be prepared, that's all… I don't want to lose him again…"

"Oh…" Sakura had no idea anymore on how to think. Sasuke was smart or fool, she didn't know anymore.

~o0o~

"It's coming…" Sai whispered and carefully he set his brush aside and rest the back of his neck on the wheelchair he was sitting on. The burning sensation he felt on his nostrils sent pain down his spine, he literally shivered.

Naruto, who understood what Sai had meant, stood up immediately from his position on the sofa and went to retrieve tissue papers on the table he had set before and put an amount of them under the artist's nostrils. Naruto was calmed and collected while holding the tissue papers, blocking the oncoming red warm liquid from staining anything. On the inside, however, his heart was racing, twisted in a painful way. He knew that Sai was having so much pain but the artist just knew how to hide it. It was too much.

"How do you feel?" Naruto asked calmly, watching the pale man who was closing his eyes shut, probably biting back the burning feeling on his nostrils.

"Ugh." Sai could only hiss. He found there was no energy to speak. Could it be more bearable than doing chemotherapy? He wasn't so sure anymore. But remembering his late brother and how he had said to him made him believe that not taking the chemo was better than taking it.

"Sai, please tell mom and dad that I don't want to prolong the torture anymore… The chemotherapy is killing me, slowly… I'd rather die than taking it. It's like I was being tortured to death."

That was what his brother had said the night before he stopped doing his chemo and eventually died.

Sai remembered after their parents' airplane crashed, Sai had to hide the news from his brother. Just a week later, Shin followed his parents.

He bit his tongue. Thinking about it wasn't even useful.

"I think we are done for today. We can continue this later." Naruto whispered, not wanting to witness the scene before his eyes any longer. It was too heartbreaking.

"I don't have tomorrow, Naruto… Beside, I've already finished…" Sai whispered back as he smiled through half-lidded eyes.

"Huh? What do you…" Naruto asked as he spun his body to see the painting behind him, because he unconsciously hadn't bat an eye on the canvas ever since he stood up from the sofa. He hadn't finished his sentence and gasped instead when his eyes landed on the painting before him.

To say that he was surprised was an understatement. The painting literally took his breath away for a moment. There on the canvas, a painting of him laying carelessly on the white sofa. It was surreal, breathtakingly beautiful.

"Do I really look like this? Because I believe that this is a god." Naruto deadpanned. Was Sai being exaggerating when he was painting him?

"I want this to be displayed in my upcoming show."

"Huh? Do you think it's-"

"Can you call Hana? I need to speak to her."

"Uh, sure." Naruto said through knitted eyebrows. Sai was ignoring him. He knew that Sai was a great artist, but every time the man painted, the outcome would leave him gasping out of surprise on how beautiful each painting could be. He shook his head finding that it was not a big deal and began searching for Sai's phone. When he found it, he dialed Hana's number. When it connected, he put the device against the pale man's ear.

"Hana. Do you think you could come to the studio tomorrow? I need you to retrieve the last piece of my painting to be displayed for the upcoming show. Great. I will be putting the painting on top of the white sofa. Okay. Thanks."

Naruto retrieve the phone after Sai raised his hand in the air signaling that the phone call had been over, and put the device on top of the table. "I have to drive you back to the hospital. It's almost dark outside."

"Naruto, can I have one last request?"

"Huh? Sure. What is it?" Naruto asked absent-mindedly.

Sai finally opened his eyes and carefully set the stained tissue paper aside. "I want to spend the night in my room with you. Not that we are going to do anything. I just want to sleep next to you this night."

Naruto shrugged, finding that there's no harm in it, since he had prepared everything if Sai needed anything. "Alright." Naruto announced as he clasped his hands together and started packing again. The two eventually left the studio and again hailed a cab to Sai's house.

Little did Naruto know that that night would be his last night with Sai…

~o0o~

Juugo was Sasuke's right hand, and he always stood in the shadow. Whatever and whenever Sasuke asked him to do something, he would never disobey. He had worked with Sasuke when the man entered the office world. He was originally working with Sasuke's brother, Itachi. But one time, Itachi ordered him to work with Sasuke, saying that he trusted Juugo to protect his little brother if needed.

Right now, for the past few days, he had been in the shadow, watching over Naruto from afar, because Sasuke had ordered him to do so. Sasuke had asked him to watch Naruto over for him, so he did as he was told. Right now, he was standing near Sai's apartment building. They were from Sai's studio before and now they had moved here. Juugo had watched Naruto since this morning with his man sitting on a wheelchair, probably the cancer was getting worse. His thought was right when an ambulance came to the apartment building and put on a slow siren, signing that whoever the person could be inside was already dead.

"Sasuke," Juugo said after the other line picked up. He was on a first name basis with Sasuke since his boss had told him so. "Sai has passed away. Yes. I will inform you any information up ahead." He ended the line after hearing that Sasuke had said that he had finished his business in the states and would be coming back as soon as possible.

~o0o~

Sai had stated obvious things about him dying, saying things that that would be his last time asking something from Naruto. Naruto knew it, but he tried to ignore it like a plague, by acting indifference on any of the artist' remark.

There was one remark by the artist, how it would be his last time asking, like the one from the hospital and the one from the studio. When they arrived in Sai's apartment, Sai had asked him to sit on the sofa, reasoning that it would be his last time of him cuddling on the sofa with the oncologist. He didn't response to those "last" remarks either, as he didn't want to provoke any feeling inside of him. He wouldn't want to breakdown in front of the dying artist. Instead, he acted happy as he could, and most of the time, acted as if it was all nothing strange. Just so he could make a memory of him displaying happiness for the artist to enjoy for the last time.

Eventually, the pale man died on his shoulder. Naruto had spent an hour mourning before he managed to call Tsunade to get him an ambulance, with a pathetic voice.

"Have I ever told you that I wanted to be cremated?"

"Don't Japanese funerals are like that?"

Sai shrugged. "Just reminding you… It's different with the funeral in German, you know…"

"Hmm…"

"I want my ashes to be thrown away in the nature. Preferably in the running river."

"Hey… Isn't it disrespectful?"

"I hadn't had the chance to burry my parents as they couldn't be found. My brother had asked me to scattered his ashes in the river in Yoyogi Park, as we didn't have family graves. I think it's good. Maybe in the afterlife, I could meet my family? Think of it this way. Would you rather be locked in somewhere dark or in the nature?"

"Well, I-"

"I choose to go back to the mother nature. You can throw my ashes later in the Yoyogi Park. I want to meet my brother there…"

"Babe, honestly it's-"

"Cool, huh? Also, I want you to sell all of the stuffs here after I die, and donated the money to the cancer research."

"You are bubbly today, aren't you?" Naruto mocked, even though he could barely even holding-on to the conversation.

"I wish I could have more time to spend with you…" Now the artist's voice had gone several octaves down into a whisper.

"Carpe diem…"

"I love you…"

"Sai…"

"…"

There was a silent and Naruto closed his eyes. He waited for about a minute when the guy had not giving any sign of breathing did he break down.

Sai had passed away.

Who was gonna lend him a shoulder to cry on when the one he always depended on, was there no more?

TBC

Published: Friday, December 15th 2017 12.07 PM (JST)