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Sorry it took me a while to update. Hope you like the chapter!
It's been a week since Hank's death anniversary. Not much has changed. I've been talking to Kim more often but that's about it. And, even though I hate to admit it, I've been thinking about Jay a couple times. Yes he gave me a hard time in the beginning, although he had absolutely no right to do that, but we got along pretty well after. And I guess that's what I've been missing this past week.
Work has been ok. I mean I basically take care of children and women that are suffering so it's not necessarily uplifting most of the time. But just the hug I got from that little girl yesterday, for taking her and her mother in, for giving them food and a warm place to stay, that hug and her little smile after makes all the heartbreak I'm feeling day in and day out worth it. Just that little glint of hope in their eyes gets me out of bed in the morning.
My alarm rings the 3rd time. I really need to get my shit together in the mornings. My eyes flutter open and I turn off the alarm. When I pull back the blanket to get out of bed, there's suddenly a warm arm wrapped around my waist that pulls me back into bed.
"David!" I giggle as he pulls me on top of him "I have to get ready for work." I demonstrate slapping his naked chest playfully. I can't move away because he has his arms wrapped around me, resting on my back and holding me tight. He knows I usually can't resist him like that.
"5 more minutes babe." He whispers against my lips and kisses me.
I'm trying to pull away but he won't let me quiet yet, knowing that he'll have me convinced in the next 3 seconds anyways. His hands travel down my back and I'm about to lose every willpower I have left.
"I have to...I have work" I mumble against his lips and finally manage to peel myself off of him a few seconds after. I can finally sit up on top of him, both of us breathing heavily.
"Good one." I chuckle breathless, pointing my finger at him and he just smirks at me.
It takes me about 20 minutes to get ready and I can finally make my way to our front door. On my way I stop in the kitchen to say 'bye' to David. He's so lucky, he usually starts around 10am. Life must be so good like that. Although I don't really think working late is much fun either. At least I am home earlier with going in early. He never really knows how long he has to stay at work.
"Bye babe, see you later." I say in a hurry and lean down to peck his lips before running out of the door.
"I love you!" He yells after me and chuckles at me being late like every morning.
"I love you, too!" I shout over my shoulder as I run out of our apartment.
The day has been going slow. My morning was great of course. There's this little girl I'm taking to school every day. I always look forward to work because I start my day with her. She reminds me of myself in a way the only difference is that she was brave enough to leave her toxic parents. I admire this little girl. She's nine years old and turns away from this life. It breaks my heart that she has no one to rely on accept herself so I promised myself that I'd make sure that she has someone to rely on.
I'm finally on my way home when I remember that we need groceries. I stop at the store using my last bills to buy what we need. 'Dammit. You need to get a new bank card'. I lost my card sometime around last week and couldn't find it ever since.
When I get home I immediately start to prepare dinner. Or attempt preparing dinner. David usually cooks because I suck at it. Just like Jay used to. I can't help but think about him lately.
It takes me a while and 3 beers but I manage to get dinner ready by the time David gets home and it's the perfect surprise.
"Wow! Do I smell food? Did my fiancé, the Erin Lindsay seriously cook for once?" He says when he makes his way into the kitchen and I can't help but laugh.
"Yes she did." I say and smile widely when he pulls me into a hug. He pulls back and kisses me gently, his hand resting on my cheek.
"I'm proud of you. There wasn't even a fire involved this time." He starts laughing but was cut off the second I slap his chest.
"Hey! That was one time okay!" I protest but can't help laughing too "Let's just eat ok? I made lasagna." He smirks because it's his favorite dish and we make our way over to the dinner table.
While having dinner we had time to catch up with how our days went. Although I notice that I'm getting tipsy after another glass of wine. And obviously David does, too.
"How are you drunk after one glass of wine?" He chuckles and I lift my finger to correct him.
"Okay first of all, I am tipsy not drunk. Second of all one glass of wine and three beers mister. I couldn't get through cooking dinner while being sober." I say and we both laugh at the fact that I hate cooking this much. All of the sudden David just stares at me intensely with a wide smile.
"I love you, you know that?"
"Of course," I smile back "and I hope you realize that I don't cook for everybody so you better know that there's love involved, too." Suddenly his smile disappears and it feels like my stomach drops right this second, wondering what's wrong.
"You've come so far, Er." He says softly and I flinch at him using the nickname that only one other man ever used for me. "I remember a time where you told me that love doesn't exist."
...
"Hey beautiful." I suddenly hear someone say next to me. I turn around to see a handsome man leaning over the bar. He is tall with brown hair and a beard and all I want to do is punch in his beautiful face.
"Excuse me?" I say with an annoyed voice. I don't really need another handsome man giving me compliments to try to get me into his bed.
"What do you mean? I just gave you a compliment." He looks at me confused. So I try to make it clear.
"Listen, I'm not looking for a hookup or something alright? I'm just having some drinks trying to process and get over some stuff. So I'm not interested." I give him a fake smile and turn my head away again.
"Wow...you're pretty judgmental. What makes you think I'm looking for a hookup and not for love? Or maybe even a friend?" He asks with raised eyebrows and I can't help but laugh sarcastically.
"Well let's see..." I start, narrowing my eyes at him. "First of all, you called me 'beautiful' so I doubt that you just want to be friends. And second of all, love doesn't exist which means if you're not looking for a friend you're looking for a hookup so...no, thank you."
...
"You were so sad back then, look at you now." David pulls me back out of the memory. I smile at him.
"What can I say, I guess you made me believe in love again" I tell him and get up to make my way over to him and he gets up looking at me, eyes filled with pure love. I wrap my arms around and look up at him.
"You healed my heart." Is all I can whisper before he crashes his lips on mine in a slightly forceful but incredibly hot way.
"You can't believe how sexy it is when you talk like that." He mumbles against my lips and I can't help but giggle against his and pull away.
"Sexy?" I chuckle again with raised eyebrows.
"Oh yeah. So. Fucking. Sexy." His voice is filled with lust and he grabs me by my thighs and picks me up right there to place me on top of our dining table. He starts placing kisses all over my neck when I grab the rim of his shirt to pull it over his head.
David starts kissing me again while picking me up and carrying me in direction of our bedroom. We're halfway through the living room when the doorbell rings. He immediately stops and pulls away, still holding me, my heels digging into his lower back.
We're both breathing heavily, looking at our apartment door.
"Let's just ignore it." I whisper breathlessly and kiss him again. He continues walking when the knock on the door sounds again. He pulls away again, throwing his head back in annoyance. "Ugh. You go." He drops me. "I, uh ... I need a minute." He says and nods down.
I just laugh and make my way over to the door as the person knocks again.
"This better be important or..." I laugh while pulling the door open. It is when I see the familiar green eyes that I immediately lose the smile on my face.
"Or what?" Jay chuckles with a raised eyebrow, his voice as cocky as it's always been.
And suddenly I can't even form a sentence. I just stare at him, heat rising in my face. I awkwardly fix my shirt and cross my arms in front of my chest and finally think of a response.
"How do you know where I live?" I ask in confusion. My question must've caught him of guard because he suddenly starts to stutter.
"I, uh...I asked Kim actually." He says and smiles awkwardly. 'Why would he ask Kim for my address?'
"Okay. Is everything alright?" I'm still confused.
"Yeah! Yes! I...I just found, well actually you forgot-"
"Hey babe!" He was cut off by David's approaching voice. "Who's at the-" he stops talking right next to me when he sees Jay. "Jay? Hey." He says just as confused as I did a couple of moments ago.
I immediately feel uncomfortable as Jay looks back and forth between David and I. My whole body feels like it is on fire and I pull on my cardigan to cover my bare shoulder. I guess that's when Jay finally realizes what he interrupted because David is still shirtless with messy hair.
He coughs and continues to talk, trying to avoid my eyes "I just...you forgot your card at Molly's the other day." He gives me the card but still avoids looking at me or David. "I'm sorry for interrupting whatever was going on...in there." He mumbles and turns around to leave.
I know this upsets him and I still care about him. Especially after the fun night out we had together. I can't let him leave like this so I run after him. I'm able to catch up with him when he reaches the stairs that lead down to the lobby.
"Jay! Wait!" I shout after him and he stops to turn around and face me.
Hey people! I'm so sorry that it took me so long to update. I've been busy during the holidays and had a hard time writing with the new PD being so different...it's kind of demotivating I think. But I'm determined to continue this story! It's what my soul needs since I don't actually have Linstead anymore lol. As always I would love to know your thoughts so please leave some reviews I truly appreciate them. I'll definitely try to update more often. Thanks!