Chapter 17 - Return to Naboo
When morning comes, I don't really feel it. But it must be morning, because the majority of the other refugees in this rust bucket are getting up, Anakin included. I don't imagine he slept, at all. He's in the same meditative position he was in before, and there's no way he sleeps like that.
I stretch and yawn, and Anakin grins at me as I wipe my eyes.
"Did you sleep well," he asks.
"It was okay. The floor was rather uncomfortable. I imagine you didn't sleep at all."
"No," he laughs under his breath. "I didn't."
I shake my head at him, disapprovingly. "You know, even with those nightmares, you have to sleep sometimes."
He nods, ashamed. "I just don't want to see her suffering."
It doesn't feel good to be telling him off, especially because he has a good reason not to sleep. But still, he is a child. Or rather, a teenager.
He looks up at me once more. Ugly purple bruise-like bags circle his eyes, and the whites of his eyes are bloodshot, like he'd been crying. But still, he captures my gaze with those baby blues of his.
I sigh, trying to shake it off, and stand up.
"I'm going to get some breakfast," I tell him.
"Take R2 with you," Anakin replies, and the droid chirps.
I nod, and he falls in line behind me. As we turn the corner of the hall, I take one last glance at Anakin. He's crouched over, his head resting on his thumbs. My heart sinks to see him like this.
R2 beeps, annoyed.
"Coming," I tell him, and chase after the astromech.
oOo
We finally end our journey in the early afternoon. The ship lands in a large shipping yard, and the refugees are unloaded first. Anakin carries my bags again, and I feel bad for letting him. But he doesn't make a fuss, and we walk in silence to the transit speeder, which will take us to the capital. I stay quiet as we fly, and Anakin watches me, silently.
When we get to Theed, he takes my things and smiles.
"Ready?"
"Always," I reply, leading him to the palace.
"So, even though it's only been two days, you must be glad to be back."
I nod. "It's wonderful here. The colors, the city, the art."
"I suppose that's why you wanted to be queen?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well," he shifts uncomfortably, "This place is the picture of beauty, and you must have wanted to make sure that that beauty never dies, that it's perfection through all the years. You must have seen that as part of the reason you even campaigned for Legislation."
"I suppose," I shrug, "but really, it was because I want to protect, and to make a change, in any way I can. And when I really thought about it, the best way to make change is government. So I joined the junior legislature when I was eight years old, and it just took over my life. didn't ever intend to become queen, I only cared about the refugee placement programs, but when the time came, it turned out to be all I've ever wanted. And more."
We make our way through the central square, past the fountain, and up the stairs.
"I wasn't the youngest Queen ever elected, but now that I look back on it I'm not sure I was old enough. Not sure I was ready."
"The people you served thought you did a good job. I heard they even tried to amend the constitution so you could stay in office."
"I was relieved when my two terms were up. But when the queen asked me to serve as senator, I couldn't refuse her."
"I agree with her," he says. "I think the republic needs you. I'm glad that you chose to serve."
I smile to myself. It's nice to know that he thinks that. I didn't think anyone really cared, but I guess I've been proven wrong.
"Thank you," I say after a long pause. He smiles at me, and we make our way to the throne room.
oOo
"Senator Amidala," exclaims the governor, Sio Bibble, as I pass through the doors of the throne room. Anakin ducks behind me, trying to stay inconspicuous. "We're glad you've arrived safely!"
"Welcome, senator," Queen Jamilia says. She doesn't try to mask who she was before she took on the scar. Her voice is just as it was before when she was elected. The face paint does little to mask her sun-kissed skin, and she leaves her hands exposed so that anyone in the room can see her identity. She doesn't hide her people behind her mask.
"It is wonderful to back," I smile, speaking as eloquently as I do in senate. I take a seat in the chair to the right of the Queen, and she smiles at me.
"So, senator," Governor Bibble begins, "tell us of the recent events at the senate."
"The senate is discussing the Military Creation Act. They intend to create an army for the republic, to combat the threats from the trade federation. At the same time, several members of the senate are leaving, and creating a new governing body, the Confederacy of Independent Systems, or as we call them, the Separatists."
"But surely the senate is not supporting this," Governor Bibble asks.
"There must be no true threat here," continues Queen Jamilia.
"It's a very real threat!" I look up at the queen, my nerves almost present on my voice. "If the senate votes to create an army I'm sure it's going to push us into a civil war."
Governor Bibble stammers in disbelief. "It's unthinkable," he objects. "There hasn't been a full-scale war since the formation of the republic."
The Queen looks to me, in despair. "Do you see any way through negotiations to bring the separatists back into the republic?"
I almost sigh. "Not if they feel threatened." Their eyes follow me, their eyebrows turned up in concern, hoping for my next words to be good news. But they aren't. "My guess is they'll turn to the Trade Federation or the Commerce Guilds for help."
Governor Bibble almost jumps up from his chair. "It's outrageous," he exclaims, "but after four trials in the Supreme Court, Nute Gunray is still the viceroy of the Trade Federation. I fear the senate is powerless to resolve this crisis."
The Queen looks to me, and then back to the governor, and back again, nervously. She's silent for a moment, and we must look to her for an answer. Finally, she speaks.
"We must keep our faith in the republic."
I nod, and so does the governor. We rise, and the Queen's handmaidens fall into formation behind her. She walks with me, smiling gently.
'The day we stop believing democracy can work," she laments, "is the day we lose it."
"Let's pray that day never comes," I agree.
"In the meantime you must consider your own safety." Queen Jamilia turns to look at Anakin, and I can see in her eyes that she finds him just as attractive as I do.
"What is your suggestion, master Jedi," asks the governor, as if speaking to a friend.
I cut Anakin off before he even speaks. "Oh Anakin's not a Jedi yet. He's still a padawan learner. But I was thinking-"
"Hold up a minute," Anakin protests.
I dismiss him. "Excuse me. I was thinking I would stay in the lake country. There's some places up there that are very isolated."
"Excuse me," Anakin protests again, more firmly this time. "I'm in charge of security here, M'Lady."
"And this is my home, I know it very well, that is why we're here." He looks back at me, defiant, but his hard exterior almost seems to chip. "I think it would be wise if you took advantage of my knowledge in this instance."
He blushes, and looks away, embarrassed. "I'm sorry, M'Lady," he mumbles,
Jamilia graciously fills the awkward silence. "Perfect. It's settled then."
oOo
The sun begins to set in the distance as we leave the palace. Anakin and I walk at the same pace, our shoes clicking on the hard cobblestones of the square. Well, circle really. The main square is round, with a large greenery and water display in the center. We're heading to the trains, so we can stay with my parents before going to the lake country. I didn't get to see them last time I was here, so now seems like a good time to visit.
Sabé, my old decoy, still works at the palace, as a senior handmaiden. She walks with us now, wearing the widest grin I've ever seen her wear, which, on a normal person might equate to a smirk.
"It's been too long, M'Lady," Sabé gushes, the excitement which runs through her, though not plain to anyone else, is plain to me.
"Sabé. You're not my maiden anymore. My name is Padme!"
She laughs. "I'm sorry, Padmé, I just... Relapsed back in time."
"How is your injury?"
She shakes her head. "You don't need to worry about that, Padmé. I'm doing alright."
"I want to know."
Sabé bites her lip, nervously.
"Well," she begins, "it's nice not to have a time of the month anymore."
Anakin sputters. "What!?"
I turn to him, and he looks back at me, his mouth agape. "Sabé was stabbed on a mission, and now she is unable to have children."
His eyes practically bulge out of his head, and I smile, realizing I will have to explain.
"About two years after the liberation, I was evacuated to O'hma-D'un, our largest moon. There's a settlement of Gungans there, mostly farmers and unskilled labourers. While I was there, we were attacked, and Sabé was being my decoy that day."
"It was a freak attack, really," Sabé explains. "Some sicko with a kitchen knife."
"But somehow, he broke through our ranks, and got his blade into Sabé. There was so much blood..." I trail off, the memories, the images of Crimson syrup dripping onto the ground, sabe's face growing pale as the blood drained from her body. "We could have lost her that day."
Sabé smiles. "You didn't lose me. And we didn't lose you. That's what counts!"
"You sacrificed yourself to protect me. And I am grateful. Which is why I want to know how you're doing. I want to repay you for what you did for me."
"The best way you can repay me," Sabé says, turning so that she's walking backwards now, "is to have your own children, for me."
She shoots a glance to Anakin, who, luckily, happens to looking away. I shake my head at her, and she almost giggles.
"Ready to go, M'Lady," Anakin asks as we near the train station.
"As I'll ever be."
"Be safe, Padmé," Sabé says, taking me in her arms.
"I will. I'll miss you," I tell her.
Anakin and I board the train, and I watch as Sabé disappears into the distance. I don't even notice when the tear drips over the edge of my eyelid. It's only when I taste the salt of my own tears that I notice that I'm crying.
I wish I could make it up to her.