Chapter Thirteen
Killian makes his way over to the mailbox, his dressing gown slung over his shoulders, coffee in one hand. The grass is wet beneath his feet. He can feel it soaking through his slippers, creating an uncomfortable feeling of dampness. He tries to ignore it as he opens the mailbox with a rusty squeak and retrieves his mail. He should be used to having a mailbox out in the open by now, having lived in America for almost half his life, but it is still his bane of his existence.
He already knows what one letter is. With a jolt to the heart, he recognises the cursive swirly letters that make up his brother's handwriting. He's already ripping it open before he's even made his way back into his house. A rectangular piece of card falls into his palm, as well as another, smaller envelope entitled Killian. He turns his attention to the invitation. Written in cursive on pastel blue paper is:
You are invited to
The Wedding of
LIAM JONES AND TINK HUDSON.
Killian's heart squeezes. He has only heard from his brother a few times since that call, and their conversations were usually too quick for his liking. They were both busy; Killian, with filming commitments, and Liam with the biggest commitment of his life.
Marriage.
Jesus, Joseph and Mary.
He reads the rest of the invitation inside, safe from prying eyes. There's always a possibility that someone is watching him. He can't even collect his post without someone taking a picture of him. He can only imagine the front page news if he teared up on the porch: Kings and Queens star has a breakdown.
And he does feel like crying. His brother. A married man. He's not sure he'll ever get used to hearing that, or saying it to himself.
The rest of the letter tells him dates and times. They're to be married in the Spring. March. Killian suppresses a smile. He thought Liam had said Tink wanted a winter wedding? Maybe she had come to her senses. There was more of a chance of pigs flying than a beautiful white winter. Unless… they were to get married here.
He turns his attention to the other envelope, barely taking his eyes off it as he lowers himself down at the kitchen table and sips his coffee. There's something else in there. He uses his thumb to brush under the flap, turning the envelope upside down, shaking it. it until a small, folded piece of paper falls out. His eyes ghost over the paper.
Dear Killian,
I know we haven't had a proper time to talk on the phone. Not for long, that is, with our busy schedules and God awful phone connection. There are things I've been wanting to say and things I'm not sure how to say, so I thought it would be best to write it down.
Here's the thing. My feelings about Emma aren't any secret. I have told you how I feel about her and I've also told her what I think of her. I'm sure she has told you what I said, and I'm sure you believe that I had no right. For this, we disagree. There's something about her I don't trust. I'm sorry brother, but that's the way it is. I won't mince my words with you; you deserve better than than. She abandoned her child for goodness sake. Surely that should give you indication of her character? Not to mention the time she spent in prison, and the various other black marks against her.
I don't say this to make you change your mind. You have always been stubborn—
"So have you, mate," Killian murmurs, fingertips ghosting over the words.
— so I say this to make you understand. Surely, if you were in my position, knowing what I know, you would feel the same? I have always protected you and I always will protect you.
But I get it. Truly, I do. You love her. For the longest time, I didn't know what love meant. Then I found Tink, and honestly, I don't know what I'd do if you didn't like her. Or at least, didn't try to like her.
So here it is. My promise to you, brother. Bring Emma to the wedding. I promise I will not be hard on her. I will not throw quipping remarks her way, or make her feel like she isn't wanted. I will be on my best behaviour and I will use this chance to get to know her. We may have gotten off on the wrong foot, but it's nothing that can't be fixed. Please, bring her Killian. Nothing will make me happier than to see you happy.
I can't wait to see you again, brother.
All my love,
Liam
Killian reads and re-reads his his brother's letter, unable to believe it. Where has this come from? Perhaps Liam isn't the stubborn one after all.
Whether that is true or not, Killian doesn't care. All that matters is that Liam, the love of his life, is getting married and he is able to bring the other love of his life to be a part of that. Everything is working out for the better. Liam will meet Emma and she will charm him with her laughter and her witty remarks. Everything will be as it should be.
There is a spring in Killian's step this morning, and a soaring in his heart he's hoping will stay. It's looking to be a good day. Not only is it his day off, but the first episode of the new season airs tonight and he's hosting a little house party. Not too big— only a few favourites from the rest of the cast; Elsa, Graham, Will and Robin. And of course, Emma, but she might as well live at Killian's, the amount of time she spends there.
Killian makes his way into the kitchen just as the phone rings, a towel clinging to his waist, He throws the towel he was using to dry his hair across the kitchen table, and makes a swipe for the phone. "Hello?"
"Killian, you're up!" Emma says.
Killian smiles, an automatic response to the sound of her voice, soft and gentle in his ear. He leans against the kitchen counter, resting his elbows on the worktop. "Swan. I was just thinking about you."
"You were?" He can hear the skepticism in her voice.
"Of course. You always consume my thoughts."
"You are so cheesy." He can almost hear her roll her eyes, but he's sure she's smiling, like it's some kind of joke. If only that were true, but the majority of his mind— and heart— is consumed by Emma these days. "I rang earlier but you didn't pick up."
"I was in the shower." He lowers his voice to a purr. "Just got out of it, actually…"
"No flirting!" she warns. "I actually rang you for a reason."
"Not just to hear my voice, surely?"
"Sorry, Killian." She laughs. "But I actually kind of have a request for tonight."
"A request? You know that whatever you want, you shall have it." He really doesn't mean his voice to lower into that purr again, but it's like it has a mind of its own.
"I was just wondering if I could bring a plus one? Maybe August?"
"Ah."
Anything but that, he thinks.
"Look, I know it's last minute and everything but we were texting this morning and he asked me my plans and I kind of just let it slip. He didn't ask to come but I feel a bit bad, and since everyone's going to be here…"
Killian tries to ignore the set of alarm bells that go off in his head at the words "texting" and "this morning". Emma is allowed to text whoever she wants, even if their intentions might not so so honourable. She can take care of herself and it's not like doesn't trust her. She wouldn't betray him.
"Sure," he says, forcing a smile. "Of course he's welcome."
"Thanks. He'll love it. I guess it's just because he's the new guy. I don't wanna leave him out."
"I know, love. Are you still bringing Henry?" he asks, desperate to move onto something that isn't August Booth.
"If that's okay?"
"Of course. You know how much I adore your lad."
"I know." There's a smile in her voice. "But anyway, he's staying at Regina's tonight. She'll probably pick him up from here before things get too late for him. So I was thinking that maybe, after everyone's left…" She trails off.
He raises an eyebrow. "Oh aye? Is this you asking for a sleepover?"
"Maybe it is."
"Don't forget your toothbrush and pyjamas."
"I was kinda gonna forget the pyjamas, actually." Her voice lowers, just like his did. It's softer, like she doesn't want to be overheard. Henry must be in the house. It's a Saturday— he can't have school.
"I thought we weren't meant to be flirting, darling?"
"Who's flirting? I was stating fact."
"In that case, if we're just 'stating fact', I feel it best to inform you that I happen to be in nothing but a towel…"
"Nothing but a towel?" Her voice is still soft. He can hear her shift closer to the phone, adjusting it on her ear.
"Yes."
"So you're essentially naked."
Their voices become softer with every word, in their own little bubble of electricity.
"That I am." He pauses. "And you could be too."
"And… wet?"
"Aye." He pauses again. She swallows. "And you could be too."
She yelps. At first he thinks it's because of what he's said— they've never been into the whole "phone sex" thing, but then when she hears another voice in the background, it all becomes blindingly obvious.
"Henry!" she says, her voice a little breathless. "How long have you been there?"
"I've been waiting for you to get off the phone for ages," Killian hears him say. "If you wanna start your pyjama party early…"
"No!" Her voice is still breathless. This time, with embarrassment. "Anyway, Killian, I'm gonna have to go. So I'll, uh, see you tonight, yeah?"
"Yes." He tries not to chuckle.
"And I can definitely bring August?" Her words are rushed, like she wants to get off the phone as soon as possible. He shakes his head, still suppressing a chuckle.
"Of course."
"Then I'll see you later. Okay, goodbye."
"Goodbye," he says, but he might as well have not bothered. She's already hung up in her haste. With one last chuckle and a shake of his head, he returns it to the hook.
Killian opens the door to a chorus of 'Whaaaay' and he knows at once who it is before he lays eyes on them. Robin and Will stand at the door, dressed casually in jeans and T-shirts. Robin holds a bottle of red wine, and Will holds a bottle of rum. They hold them up into the light.
"We come bearing gifts," Will says and Robin chuckles beside him.
"Then by all means, come on in." He steps back and they clambour in.
Killian peers out into the rapidly darkening sky. The air is cool, a breeze lifting his hair. There isn't any sign of anyone else. He wonders if Emma will arrive with August, or whether she'll just give him Killian's address.
He doesn't have to wait too long to find out because August is the next person to turn up, on his own. Killian opens the door, a smile on his face. His smile begins to rapidly fall when he realises who it is. He has to fight to keep the remains of the smile on his face.
"Ah, August," he says, hoping his voice sounds smooth and friendly. "Come on in."
"Thanks Killian," he says.
He holds a bottle of wine in one hand and a huge bunch of flowers in the other. They fall out of his arm, colours of white, red, blue, yellow. They're the most beautiful flowers he's ever seen. They must have cost a fortune.
"Mate, they're beautiful," Killian says. "But you shouldn't have."
August laughs. "Oh, they're not for you. They're for Emma." He pushes his way inside when Killian doesn't step back.
"For… Emma?" He asks weakly, closing the door. "Why?"
August turns to face him, his eyes sparkling up in amusement. And for one insane moment, Killian wants to punch that smirk off his face. But August is his house guest and that wouldn't be proper. Instead, he remains quiet and listens to August's explanation.
"Emma's been so kind to me recently, so I feel like she deserves them. I mean, all the tours she's been giving me around set, and all the pointers I've gotten from her. I mean, she even invited me here, and she didn't have to. It's not like anyone else did." He laughs and Killian manages a weak smile. "She's really gone out of her way to be kind to me when no-one else has, y'know what I mean?" His eyes soften. "She deserves so much more than these flowers, but they're all I could get on last minute notice. They cost me an arm and a leg but God, she deserves them."
Killian swallows, scratching the back of his head. He doesn't know why he feels so embarrassed or… ashamed, but he can feel the blush creeping up the back of his neck. "I didn't think Emma was a flower person."
"Really? She was only saying last week how no-one ever buys her flowers."
"Right." He swallows again, his mouth oddly dry.
"Is there anywhere I can put these?" He holds the flowers up. "They're kind of heavy."
"Yes, of course. Just put them on the kitchen counter. Emma will be along in a minute, I'm sure." He forces another one of those smiles, but it's like his face isn't working properly. His eyes remain hard and cold, no matter how much warmth he tries to put in them.
"Thanks."
Killian watches as August disappears into the kitchen and a loud chorus of 'Whaaaay!' is heard. He stands for a moment, confused why wondering why he feels so cold.
Elsa is the next to arrive, which gives Killian some distraction. She greets him with a wide, amber-lipped smile. But she takes one look at his face and her expression drops. She asks him what's wrong in hushed whispers on the porch, but he shakes his head and tries another smile. He can tell she doesn't believe him but she goes on into the living room.
Emma and Henry arrive next, and Killian has never been more relieved to see her in his whole life. She moves into kiss him at once, despite her boy being there, and he returns it.
"You're cold," he says, as he takes her face in his hands and presses another chaste kiss to her lips. "God, Emma, you're freezing."
Her smile doesn't falter. "It's autumn, y'know. The nights are cold."
"Go on in. Warm up."
"Thanks."
She ushers Henry forward and he runs inside, murmuring his hellos to Killian. As soon as he's out of sight, Emma grabs Killian by his shirt and pulls him in for a proper kiss. He's surprised but the feeling of her lips on his is comforting and despite her cold skin, her body is warm. He pulls her close.
"Okay, wow," he murmurs as she pulls back.
"Guess what?" Her lips whisper against his.
"What?"
"I didn't bring my pyjamas." She releases him and then, like she didn't just make a comment that sent him reeling, she says. "Is everyone here?"
"We appear to be waiting on Graham." He steps back to let her inside and she walks past him, the smell of her flowery perfume following her.
"Typical," she says.
Killian is just about to close the door when he hears a "Wait!" He looks up to see Graham running up the garden path, his coat flapping behind him, a bottle of wine in each hand, a dark purple box under his arm, but Killian can't make out what it is.
The sight of him makes Killian's face break out into a smile almost at once. It shocks him to find it's genuine. It seems that the days where he fantasised about burying something into Graham's neck are long gone.
"Hurry up," he calls, laughter escaping his lips.
Graham runs up the garden path and comes to a stop in front of the door. "Hey," he breathes out, his breaths coming in pants. He whizzes by Killian into the house. Under the lights, Killian can see him properly. His crazy mess of curls stick up in all directions, and his cheeks are flushed. He starts to speak but all that comes out is wheezing.
"Bloody hell," Killian laughs. "You okay, mate?"
"There's my exercise for the week," Graham says, still struggling to speak. He thrusts the wine bottles into Killian's hand. "For you. They were out of rum."
"What about those," he said, nodding to the box under Graham's arm.
When he swipes them from under his arm, Killian gets a good look at them. It's a box of chocolates, a variety of them displayed on the front. There's every chocolate he can think of: caramel, toffee, honeycomb.
"Let me guess, for Emma?" Killian says, grimly.
"No." Graham frowns, holding the box out for him. "For you."
"Oh. Right."
He takes the box from Graham's hands. It's big. It must have about three layers of chocolates in there. Belgian chocolates, he realises, with a twitch of his lips.
"I figured that everyone would be bringing wine or rum or something, so I thought I'd bring something different."
"I'm not complaining." He shakes the box and the chocolates rattle. "They're all my favourites."
"Mine too, if you're willing to share one." He chuckles and Killian finds himself smiling back. "But seriously, thanks for inviting me. You didn't have to be so… nice to me after our… differences, so I really appreciate it."
"Don't worry about it."
"Hang on—" Graham frowns. "Why did you think these were for Emma? You're the host, right?"
"Ah." He sighs, casts a glance towards the kitchen and then lowers his voice. "August bought Emma a bunch of flowers."
"Flowers? How come?"
"To thank her for being so nice to him."
He expects Graham to tell him that that's nice, or laugh, or smile. At the very least, he expects him to brush it off and continue on into the kitchen. But his frown becomes deeper. He scratches his cheek in thought.
"I'll be honest with you. I'm not sure I trust him, Killian."
Thank God, Killian thinks. He bites back a sigh of relief.
"You're not?"
"No, I'm not."
He opens his mouth to continue and Killian finds himself inching closer, wanting to hear everything, all his suspicions about August. Hearing that someone else doesn't trust him makes him feel like he might not be going mad, that he might not be just a jealous boyfriend. But anything that he might have confessed is cut off when an explosion of laughter comes from the kitchen.
Killian and Graham follow the noise with their eyes.
"I bet that's August's fault," Graham says. "He's funny, y'know." He doesn't say it with the conviction of someone who believes it. He says it like that's the most suspicious thing in the whole world. "We best go in there."
"You're right."
Killian follows Graham into the kitchen. Everyone is huddled around the island in the middle of the room, grinning. They all have drinks in their hands, having helped themselves to Killian's cupboards. It doesn't bother him, not when he's told them to do that before. Or it wouldn't bother him if it isn't for August, who holds a glass in one hand, the flowers in the other. He holds them out to Emma, who's grinning from ear-to-ear.
"For me?" She takes them, her face falling into a mix of awe and shock. "Why?"
August shrugs. "What can I say? You've been so good to me these last few weeks. Honestly, I didn't think I was going to fit in. Everyone knows each other. But you— you've made this experience something I'll never be able to be able to replace."
She brings the flowers up to her nose. "They're beautiful."
"They pale in comparison to your beauty."
They pale in comparison to your beauty. He says it almost as a throwaway line, and no-one else seems to notice that he has just said a very romantic line to Killian's girlfriend. He has to clench his jaw to stop himself from saying anything as the wave of rage washes over him. But one look at Graham's somber face and sorrowful eyes tell him that he's not entirely out of line.
"Thank you," Emma says, still breathing in the scent. "No-one ever buys me flowers, so it's a nice surprise."
That seems to be a throwaway line too, but it makes Killian's heart squeeze. He wants to groan, to bury his head in his hands because he should be buying her flowers. Instead, this frankly awful copy is doing it for him. He should grab August by the hair and throw him out of his house.
But instead, he takes a deep breath. In and out. Calm.
Calm.
And then:
"Who's ready for the episode? I think it starts in ten." He says it with such ease that he's fairly sure no-one will notice the storm building inside him.
Everyone assumes their places, spreading themselves out on the long corner sofa in Killian's living room. Killian takes the end of the sofa where he can get up easily to refill everyone's drinks, with Emma sat next to him. To Killian's complete annoyance, August sits the other side of Emma. Killian tries not to scowl at that.
Elsa sits at the other end of the sofa, next to Henry. They chat away about something that Killian can't quite make out, but if the grin on the boy's face is anything to go by, Killian can assume its adequate conversation.
Graham sits on the other side of August in conversation with Will and Robin. Robin says something Killian can't make out and the group of three erupt into laughter. Killian turns to Emma to inquire what must be so funny, but she's talking to August about the episode.
So Killian sits there, his hand clasped around his glass, staring into the dark liquid. Never has he felt so alone in his own house.
He's relieved when the clock above the television tells him it's five to nine. Everyone calls out for Killian to turn the TV on and he does, with a grin. There's a flutter of nerves in her stomach, as there always is with the beginning episode to a new season. He never knows what the reaction of the fans is going to be.
"You know what we should do?" August tells everyone while they wait for the show to come on, absently watching an advertisement for toothpaste. "We should take a photo!"
"Killian should do it," Graham says at once. When everyone turns to look at him, he shrugs. "He's the host."
So that's how Killian finds himself perched on the arm of the sofa, his own arm outstretched, trying to hold his phone as high as he can. Everyone crowds around him, Henry included. He watches them adjust themselves in the camera; their hair, their clothes.
"Alright, everyone ready?" Killian asks.
They confirm they are and he presses the button, a flash omitting light throughout the room. Killian's eyes ghost over the photo and he smiles. Everyone looks so happy, grinning with their teeth, their eyes sparkling, but the person he can't take his eyes off is Emma. She's so beautiful, and she looks especially gorgeous in this photo. He's so distracted by her, he hardly notices the twinge of annoyance at how close August moves to her, his arm thrown casually around her.
He passes the phone around, listening to everyone's comments.
"God's sake, is that how big my nose is?" Will complains.
"Why did no-one tell me to brush my hair?" Graham laughs.
When it reaches Killian again, he posts it to twitter with the caption, Good wine. Good friends. Good TV. His mentions explode at once as everyone retweets and likes. People are immediately panicking, tweeting each other. He scrolls down some of the comments, chuckling to himself.
Omg look at them they're together
MY BABIES ARE ALL UNITED
So does this mean august is a series regular?
Below that someone had replied with:
Yes. it was confirmed a few weeks ago that he's a regular. he's a prince but I guess we'll find out more tonight
The tweets keep pouring in.
KILLIAN IS SAT NEXT TO EMMA. THIS IS NOT A DRILL
#CAPTAINSWANISREAL
Killian looks sooooo good
That makes him chuckle. He replies a quick, Yes I do ;), which results in a major freak out on the girls' part. At least he assumes she's a girl. Her name is MrsKillianJones, which makes him chuckle even more. He replies to his own tweet: Also I prefer a summer wedding, Mrs. Jones ;)
"You are such a flirt," Emma says. He hadn't realised she was looking over his shoulder.
"If you're gonna make their hearts race, you might as well do it thoroughly." He chuckles. "You know, they're still convinced we're together."
"I kinda wish we didn't know you were together," Will calls. "Maybe then we wouldn't hear you having sex in your trailer."
Everyone explodes in laughter.
"Emma's lad's in the room!" Killian chokes out.
His eyes immediately fly to Henry who looks over at Will. He expects to see his face drop into one of horror, but instead, he just looks bored. He just shrugs and looks over at his mortified mother. "I heard your phone conversation this morning, so… y'know."
Emma buries her head in her hands. "You're kidding, right?"
"I'm not a kid anymore, mom."
"Hang on—" Will begins. "What phone conversation is this?"
But before Henry reveals any of their secrets, the theme tune for Kings and Queens starts and everyone casts their attention to the screen. Killian breathes out a sigh of relief and reaches for his phone.
About to watch Kings and Queens, he tweets. Who's with me?
Again, he mentions explode and he forced to tweet out:
Hey! Eyes on the screen, loves. The TV screen, that is.
The episode is good, in Killian's opinion. It's still Belle's writing, which means it hasn't all gone wrong quite yet. It's an odd thing watching himself on screen. He'd never seen himself, not truly, until the first time he watched something he was in. Now, in HD, he can see all his imperfections, even that pesky scar on his cheek. It's funny to see himself reflected, to see the way his mouth moves, how it quirks up when he speaks. The voice coming from his lips is his but at the same time, it isn't. It's like watching a strange, warped version of himself, and he fears he'll never get used to it. If he and the cast didn't have the tradition of watching the episodes together, he'd probably never watch it.
But the most difficult thing to watch doesn't come until halfway through the episode when Killian watches himself close the chamber door and cross the take Emma in his arms. He knows what scene this is— he filmed it a few weeks ago— and as they kiss, he's starting to remember every embarrassing detail of the sex scene.
Henry seems to grasp what's happened a moment after the first kiss and he groans, burying his head in his hands. "Really?"
"Don't watch!" Elsa says, then laughs.
"I didn't think this was going in the first episode," Emma says. "Y'know, since we filmed it late." Only the slight tapping of her foot indicates that she's nervous. "Sorry, Henry."
"It's okay," Henry says, voice muffled by his hands. "Just tell me when it's over."
But it's a long one— the longest yet— and Killian becomes very aware of the wet sounds of kissing, the sighs and the gasps. The sound of fabric rubbing against fabric. And then he starts to moan and he finds himself covering his own eyes with his hand, trying to ignore the red blush creeping up his neck.
Robin coughs awkwardly and Will has to stop himself from snorting. It's almost like watching a sex scene with his parents but it's worse because it's them. It's him. And it seems to go on a lot longer than he remembers, like time has been stretched thin. When the scene ends and the episode continues as normal, Killian's hands slowly start to unclench, his body beginning to relax. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Henry emerge from his hands.
He glances over at Emma. She doesn't seem too bothered by it. There isn't any blush creeping up her neck, and apart from the foot tapping, no signs of worry. Maybe she's just become a truly amazing actress.
When August comes on, he has to stop himself from scoffing, since the man himself is in the same room with him.
When the episode ends, everyone cheers and applauds. They all start to congratulate each other and immediately turn to Henry to ask him what he thought of the episode, as a fan. Henry reels off something about it being amazing, blushing under Elsa's gaze, and Killian zones out. He turns to Emma and throws an arm around her.
"Post-show selfie?"
She laughs. "Sure."
He pulls her close and she rests her cheek against his, her head practically on his shoulder. He can feel her hair tickling his chin and neck as he moves his arm, holding the phone out. He snaps a quick picture of the two of them and brings his phone back, his arm still thrown around Emma.
"You look heaven sent," he says and he can feel her smiling next to him.
He posts the picture with the caption: We loved it! What did you think?
Again, his phone blows up with tweets from all around the world. There are many generic tweets, the ones he'd expect, such as:
AMAZING, I loved it
I loved it it was brilliant!
You guys look great! Amazing episode 3
And also ones about himself and Emma, as he knew there would be:
They look so married
They are together. #captainswan I ship it
Okay but has anyone else realised that theY JUST WATCHED THEMSELVES MAKING OUT ON SCREEN
Everyone stays for another hour and Killian continues to top up the drinks, watching as everyone slowly starts to get more red-faced and merry. The laughter becomes louder and the conversation becomes slowly more animated.
At half ten Regina picks Henry up from the house. Judging by Henry's sombre frown and the way he drags his feet, Killian is willing to bet that the lad doesn't want to leave, but his mother is a stern woman. Well, both his mothers. His mood soon improves when Elsa gives him a kiss on the cheek goodbye, and he blushes from his head to his toe. He's still blushing when he leaves with Regina.
Though Killian struggles to remember most of the night, at some point Isaac is mentioned, as he knew he would be. He's relieved to find out that the majority of people hate Isaac just as much as Killian. He knew he could count on his friends.
"I mean, slowly cutting Belle out of everything," Will says, pointing his glass as he speaks, glaring at nothing in particular. "What a dick!"
"And I don't like these changes he's making," Robin says. "First Alexander and Rose— what next? They're the it couple. If you guys have been on social media in the past hour, you'll see the love everyone has for them." He sways on the spot, sloshing half his drink over the glass. Killian feels a sick sort of pleasure at his defense of Alexander and Rose in front of August. He almost wants to shout ha! Take that!
"And Grumpy said some of us would have to be cut," Emma says, frowning.
"Thank God no-one's been cut yet," says Elsa. "I know it's the nature of the job, but I don't think I can stomach the thought of anyone leaving."
"Speak for yourself," Graham says. "I was almost cut last year, remember? If those scripts hadn't been leaked, I probably wouldn't be standing here with you right now."
They all murmur in agreement.
"Well I for one," Killian begins, holding his glass up. It shines in the light. "Am thrilled that you are still among us, Graham. It wouldn't be the same without you." And he means it.
One by one everyone starts to leave, disappearing out of his house and into the night, thanking him for a great evening. Elsa is the first to leave, with hugs for everyone, and then Robin and Will. Eventually it's only Graham and August left, sat on the sofa, chatting about work with Emma.
Killian's eyes fly to the clock. It's pushing eleven and all Killian can think about is a long night with Emma. A long night that will soon be very short if they don't leave soon. He doesn't know the best way to broach the subject, but he thinks Emma might be of some help if her yearning looks are anything to go by. She confirms his suspicions when they're in the kitchen together, topping up their drinks.
"Is it bad that I kinda want you alone?" she whispers, as quiet as her drunk-self will let her and he chuckles, shaking his head.
"I believe a pyjama party was promised. Without the pyjamas." He raises an eyebrow.
"How do we get rid of them?"
"Follow my lead."
They return to the living room, fresh drinks in hand. Killian is very aware of Emma behind him, her body brushing his as they come to stand side by side in the living room. He longs to sweep her upstairs or, in the very least, to kiss her here, but that would not appropriate with guests. So instead he gives a very loud yawn, stretching one arm above his head.
"Is that how late it's gotten?" He gestures to the clock with his head. "Bloody hell. How time flies."
Graham immediately jumps up. "Whoops. I guess that means I should be off then!" he says. Killian sighs relief, especially as Graham looks over to August and says, "You coming?"
"Actually, I think I'm gonna stay here for a little bit, if that's okay?" He directs a look at Killian.
"Of course. Stay as long as you wish," he says, hating himself, wishing he'd throw the man out the door.
They bid Graham farewell with hugs and a pat on the back. Graham thanks Killian for a great night and gives him a meaningful look Killian doesn't quite understand. But he stares back, trying to make it look like he understands a great deal. Then he's gone, out into the cold and darkness, and there's only August to get rid of.
But getting rid of him proves nearly impossible.
Regardless of how many times Killian makes a comment about the time, or how Emma yawns, August doesn't seem to get the hint. He drinks his wine slow, hardly taking in mouthfuls when he sips, chatting to Emma. They talk about their upcoming scenes, and about jokes Killian isn't aware of. Though Emma usually laughs easily around August, Killian starts to notice that her laughter is strained. Her smile, forced.
And eventually she says, "I'm actually really tired," throwing a pointed look in Killian's direction.
"Me too," Killian says, rubbing his eyes. "Bloody hell, I'm exhausted. I think I might call it a night."
"I think that's my cue," August says, eyes sparkling.
Thank God.
But then he looks directly at Emma and says, "Do you wanna share a cab?"
"Oh." She glances over at Killian. "That's really thoughtful of you August but I'm kind of… staying here."
"You are?"
"Yeah."
"Overnight?"
She frowns. "Yeah."
What else could she have meant? Killian wants to scream. What next, is he going to ask her if she's going to sleep in his bed, if she's going to stay the morning. The man needs to leave. It's exhausting to just look at him.
"Then I really best be off then," August laughs. Emma laughs too.
Killian tries to join in the laugher. "Yes, you best leave."
By the time he's gone— which takes him an extra ten minutes— Killian is starting to feel tired. No, not tired. Exhausted. He struggles to keep his eyes open and one look at Emma tells him that she feels the same.
"So uh," he says, scratching the back of his head. "I take it you'll want to borrow a pair of my pyjamas?"
She nods. "Yeah. I think I'm actually too tired to…"
"Understandable." He gives her a smile.
But as it turns out, they end up sleepily making love to one another. It's the most gentle experience he's ever had, especially where Emma is concerned. They cover each other with clumsy kisses and their touches are less than careful, but there's something in it that makes it incredible so special. Something that makes his heart want to burst from his chest as he holds her or, embarrassingly, something that makes his eyes wet with tears. Tears, he doesn't let her see.
It's the softest, most tender way he has ever loved a woman and with every kiss, there is feeling. With every touch, there is longing. When it's over and he holds her in the darkness, he waits for it. The I love you, that he knows will inevitably fall from her lips. Because after this, after everything, how can she still be afraid to say it? How can she doubt it?
But it doesn't come.
Thanks for reading! I'm really loving all your comments - they're so fun to read! XD Let me know your theories!