I am a very overly critical person when it comes to myself. With that being said, I had a really hard time writing this chapter. I just wasn't happy with the way things were flowing and I kept re-writing things. So I apologize for the quality of this chapter. Hopefully, I'm just being cryptic and it doesn't suck as much as I think it does, lol. Also, I just wanted to point something out-Nathan's biggest problem in this story isn't Damien, it's himself. Damien does cause a lot of problems, but ultimately, it's Nathan's own demons that he has to overcome. I don't want to say Damien is harmless, because he's definitely not, but he doesn't carry as much weight as you think. Hopefully, that makes sense to all of you. My mind can be...rather complex.
P.S. I have something to ask you guys. In the beginning of this story, I did give the warning that I was going to include things of the sexual nature, a lot more than I did in previous stories. Obviously, the topic of sex did come up in the last chapter. Now, couples (for the most part) work up to sex by doing other things. That can safely be implied/assumed. My question to you guys is do you want me to include their sexual journey (for lack of a better word) in this story or just leave implications of it? I included the warning because I planned on including those moments, but I wanted your opinions. It wouldn't serve a lot of purpose in terms of the plot, but it would also provide more smutty/hot Naley scenes, besides the first time they have sex. I have no problem writing them, but I don't want to include them if no one interested. Please let me know in your reviews!
Haley's eyes trailed slowly over Nathan's face. She'd been up for the last twenty minutes but didn't have it in her to disturb Nathan. He was still sleeping, his arm lazily banded around her waist, holding her close even in his sleep. She could see the slight movements of his eyes underneath his pale eyelids and long eyelashes. She found herself mesmerized by the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest. He looked so peaceful, the usual worry lines on his forehead were smooth and the usually dark bags under his eyes were nothing but faint shadows now.
He was exquisite, there was no other way to describe him. Haley felt her heart begin to hammer in her chest.
Last night was the best night of sleep she had ever had. She thought for sure that she would have been up most of the night worrying about her mom, but in his arms, she felt serene. It was like with him, the outside world didn't exist. However, when she glanced over at the alarm clock besides Nathan's bed, she realized that the outside world did still exist. They had to be at school in a little over an hour. For the first time in her academic career, going to school was the last thing she wanted to do.
"I can feel you staring," Nathan murmured hoarsely, his voice thick with sleep. She could see the hint of a lazy smirk on his face, but his eyes remained closed.
A slow smile spread across Haley's face, her cheeks flushing. "I'm not staring," She answered innocently.
His smirk widened. "Then, what are you doing?"
"I'm gazing," Haley clarified. "There's a difference."
A short chuckle escaped Nathan's lips. "Oh yeah, how so?"
"Staring is creepy, gazing is romantic."
Nathan's eyes fluttered open as he turned to look at her. Her blonde curls were a mess against the pillows and her eyes were still glazed over with sleep. Even then, she was beautiful. His smirk had melted into a playful smile. All of the stress of yesterday was long forgotten. For once in his life, he felt well rested. Most mornings, he didn't want to leave his bed because he didn't want to live. The former was still true, but now he didn't want to leave his bed because he never wanted this moment with Haley to end.
Dusting his fingers across the exposed skin of her back where her shirt had ridden up, he narrowed his eyes playfully at her. "Okay, smart ass, why are you 'gazing' at me?"
Haley remained silent for a few moments, her eyes once again moving over his features. Her chest felt heavy with emotion as his eyes curiously watched her. "Because, you're perfect," She finally answered, her voice barely above a whisper.
Nathan furrowed his eyebrows at her, a fierce heat trickling through his body. No one had ever used that word to describe him before. Never had he believed that he was worthy of being called that word. Even hearing that word fall from her lips, he couldn't help but think how ridiculous it sounded. So, he laughed, not at her, but himself.
"I'm serious," Haley declared as she scooted up and closer to him. Propping herself up, she used her free hand to lightly trace around his eyes, his nose, his lips, and then his jaw. "Those heartbreakingly beautiful blue eyes, this sharp nose, those soft lips…every single inch of you is perfect."
"Hales." Nathan's eyes fluttered closed and his head titled back into the pillow when she began to place soft kisses on his chest, her small fingers tracing the cut of his stomach. She seemed to pay special attention to the scar on his chest and it caused a fire to race through his veins. His heart was pounding in his chest and he was trembling. Everywhere she kissed or touched him felt like a raging inferno was starting inside of him. He let her adoring words soak through his skin and it caused an unnamable feeling to bubble up in the pit of his stomach. When he felt her lips caress the juncture of his collarbone, he lost it. Titling her head up, he captured her lips in a searing kiss and flipped them over, pining her body to the soft mattress.
Haley gasped into his mouth as her fingers buried themselves in his hair. She kissed him back feverishly, the tingles spreading quickly through her body. A shiver ripped through her body when his hand slid under the shirt she was wearing, his fingers delicately stroking the hot skin of her lower stomach and back.
After a few moments, Nathan pulled away. He was breathing heavily as his eyes trailed over her. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were shining back at him. In that moment, it was like he could pretend that his life was perfect. He could almost forget that Damien existed or that he was so fucked up. He ignored that annoying voice in his head, reminding him of all the things that could and probably would go wrong. The only thing that mattered was the blessing laying in his arms.
"What?" Haley asked, breathless. She squirmed a little under his intense gaze. The way he looked at her sometimes…it felt like he could see right down to her soul.
"You're an angel," He replied heatedly. "I don't know what I ever did to deserve you. I can't…I can't believe you're all mine."
Haley flushed, her heart fluttering at his words. "I love being yours." It was then that she thought back to the previous night and everything that had transpired between them. For some reason, the recollection of that memory brought forth another one, as well, one that wasn't so happy. Her cheeks flushed further. "Can I ask you something?"
Nathan nodded. "Anything."
She gnawed on her bottom lip as she tried to find the correct way to formulate her question. "Okay, so, normally, I'm not one for listening to gossip. If I was, I probably wouldn't be lying next to you right now. I don't want you to—"
"Hales," Nathan said with a chuckle, his hand giving her waist a gentle squeeze. "Just spit it out."
She inhaled deeply before spilling out the words that were jumbled in her brain. "Brooke mentioned something a while ago about you being 'caught' with a teacher and I just wanted to know if it was true."
Nathan remained silent for a few seconds, studying the way her cheeks were a cherry red and her bottom lip was raw from how hard she was chewing on it. Then, he started to laugh.
"Nathan!" She admonished. "I don't see anything funny about this." And, she really didn't. She always figured that Nathan was much more…experienced than her, despite the fact he'd never had a girlfriend. She'd heard the rumors, not that she believed them, but she figured there was some truth to them. A part of her was scared to know just how experienced he was, while the other part of her needed to know.
Noticing the serious expression on her face, Nathan quieted his laughter. It didn't surprise him one bit that she had heard that rumor about him. Out of all the rumors that had went around about him, that one had to be the one to lasted the longest. Reaching up, he gently tucked a piece of wayward hair behind her ear. "The only thing that teacher was 'caught' for was asking me to sell her drugs."
Haley's eyebrows furrowed. "What?
Chuckling softly, he smiled at her. "When I first started hanging out with Damien, a rumor went around that I was a drug dealer. She stupidly asked me after class if I could sell her some and the principal walked in just as she was asking me. That's all."
"Were you? A drug dealer, I mean," She asked quietly. She couldn't deny the amount of relief she felt at hearing the rumor was, in fact, a bust.
Nathan swallowed hard before chuckling nervously. "No." Only working with one.
"That's crazy," Haley mumbled. "I thought they did drug tests on teachers."
Nathan only shrugged. He really didn't want to talk about this, not now. So, instead, his hand absentmindedly rubbed the curve of her waist. He smirked when she visibly shivered. For most of his life, Nathan wasn't one for affectionate human contact. He used to hate when his mom forced him to hug relatives at family gatherings or when she would constantly try to hug him. When he hooked up with a girl, he never cuddled with her or anything of that nature. He never understood why he was like that, he just was.
But like everything else in his life, it was different with Haley. He couldn't keep his hands off of her and better yet, he didn't want to. The warmth and safeness that he felt whenever she touched him or vice versa was something he had noticed right away. He tried like hell to fight it off, just like he did with everything else involving Haley. But now, he was going to relish in it.
"You said you had a rough day yesterday," Haley muttered, breaking the silence. She knew what she was about to say was a long shot, but she needed to try anyway. "Do you want to talk about it?"
Nathan sighed as he shook his head. Even the mere mention of the yesterday's events had his chest tightening. But with a simple glance in her eyes, Nathan suddenly felt the urge to tell her everything. The words were on the tip of his tongue and it scared him how easily he could've let his guard down. There was something still stopping him, though. The fear of telling her the truth, the fear of her knowing the real him…that wasn't something he wasn't willing to risk. Not yet.
"I-I had a rough run in with Damien, that's all."
Haley tensed at the mention of Damien, her eyebrows furrowing further with worry. "What happened?"
"The usual, him trying to get under my skin."
Haley didn't miss the way Nathan's eyes seemed to darken or the way his features seemed to harden. Sighing, she reached up to caress his cheek. She smiled softly when he leaned into her touch. "You know you can talk to me…about anything. I know you're new at this whole relationship thing, but we're basically each other's therapists now." Her voice was light and teasing.
Nathan smiled. It was one of those smiles that was strictly reserved for her. "I know, Hales, I know. But there really isn't much to tell."
She stared at him for a few seconds. She wasn't sure if she fully believed him, but she decided to let it go. She promised him that she would be patient and she didn't take promises lightly. "You never did tell me how I'm miraculously not tutoring Damien anymore."
"I told you I would take care of it and I did."
"How did you even manage that? Sell your soul to the devil?"
In a way, yes. "I just talked to Damien and got him to back off. I can be pretty intimidating when I want to be."
Haley giggled. "I'm sure you can be."
"Well, what about you?" Nathan quickly changed the subject. "You mentioned something about your mom leaving?"
She'd forgotten all about that and the reminder felt like a bullet in her heart. Her anger and sorrow quickly resurfaced as she replayed the argument in her mind. The hand that was resting on his cheek fell to his shoulder. "She, um, has some work to take care of in New York and Chicago."
"How long is she going to be gone?"
"Two weeks."
Nathan's eyes widened in disbelief. "She's leaving you alone for two weeks?"
Haley nodded solemnly. Before she realized it, she was spilling all of her feelings out to him. "I'm not really surprised, though. Her work always comes first. It just kind of sucks because she'll be gone for Thanksgiving. That was always my dad's favorite holiday and we always do something special for it. The part that hurts the most is that she didn't seem to care. Except, I know she does. She buries all of her feelings and hides everything from me like I can't handle it. Now, I have to spend the holiday alone."
Nathan could clearly see the pain in her eyes and his heart ached in response. Haley always seemed so put together and to see her in pain…he realized that he didn't like it. He wanted, no, he needed, to find a way to take her pain away. Reaching up, he tucked a piece of wayward hair behind her ear. "Maybe you don't have to."
"What do you mean?"
"For Thanksgiving, Lucas and I go over his mom's. Come with us."
Haley's first reaction was to shake her head. "I couldn't. I wouldn't want to impose."
"You wouldn't be. No one should spend the holiday alone, especially if that holiday means a lot to you. Besides, Keith and Karen have been on our asses about bringing a girl 'home' for awhile now. They'll be thrilled to have you," Nathan explained, trying his best to coax her into it. He surprised even himself with that offer.
"Keith?" Haley pondered.
"Karen's husband and my uncle."
Haley couldn't deny the fringe of excitement she felt at the possibility of meeting someone from Nathan's family. But, she also felt nervous. "Are you sure they won't mind?"
"Positive."
"Well, if you're asking, then I guess I'm coming." She smiled brightly but her euphoria didn't last long when she noticed the time. "Shoot, Nathan, we have to be at school in twenty minutes!"
Nathan laughed at the way Haley scrambled out of his bed and out of his embrace. "School's overrated. I say we just don't go." But when Haley glared at him, he knew there was no way that was an option.
~x~
Tonight. 8 pm. Pool house. Prove your loyalty.
Nathan scowled as he slammed his phone shut. Now that he was no longer in a Haley induced bubble, the reality of his life had come crashing down on him…hard. He had forgotten how demanding Damien could be. It was party after party and plan after plan.
As much as he hated this situation that he was in and as much as he dreaded the things he knew he was going to have to do, he couldn't bring himself to back down. It would've been easy to tell Damien to fuck off. It would've given him free reign to do whatever he wanted to Nathan. A few months, Nathan wouldn't have cared.
Right now, he felt like he was on the brink of two different versions of himself. Both sides of him were at war with each other, at least, that's what it felt like. One version of himself didn't care…about anything. He already lost everything he ever 'cared' about, everything else was just collateral damage. Damien could hurt him in any way he thought fitting and it would feel like a slap on the wrist. All that side needed was booze and pain. That was the side of him that scared him.
The other side, the side that was becoming stronger with every passing day, cared….and it cared immensely. He wanted to fight to get his life back. He wanted to numb the pain and move on. He wanted to live and to be happy. It was also the side of him that was terrified—terrified of losing anything else. That was who he was before Damien. He knew he had Haley to thank for resurfacing that side of him.
There was only one question that remained—which version of himself would end up on top?
"Tell me, did my eyes deceive me this morning or was Haley James actually in your bed?" Lucas joked as he slapped on a hand on Nathan's shoulder. Nathan was just turning away from his locker, heading towards the courtyard for lunch.
"Damn, that was fast…even for you," Jake muttered from the other side of Lucas.
Nathan's scowl became more prominent as his eyes narrowed. "Nothing happened," He barked.
"Woah, dude," Jake's eyes widened at the icy tone in Nathan's voice. "I was just joking."
"I'm not in the mood for jokes," Nathan said gruffly, tightening the straps on his backpack.
"Nate, what's going on?" In a way, Lucas found this situation kind of comical. He had just gotten used to Nathan being in a good mood and now he was back to being moody.
Noticing that they were almost to the girls, Nathan shook his head. "I'll tell you later."
"You said that yesterday," Jake pointed out.
"Well, this time, I mean it."
"Good, I'm glad you guys are finally here!" Brooke beamed, clapping her hands together. She waited until the boys sat down before she began to speak again. "I have an announcement to make."
"Another party? Really, Brooke? You just had one not too long ago," Peyton mumbled without looking up for the Rolling Stone magazine she was ready.
Brooke rolled her eyes. "It's not a party…per say, just a social gathering, between all of us."
"Wait, is this about that 'friendsgiving' thing that you brought up the other day?" Haley asked as she leaned more into Nathan. He was straddling the bench beside her, his chest facing her. She smiled when she felt his hand on her lower back.
Brooke nodded. "I've decided to have it the Friday after Thanksgiving. Obviously, since we're going to be seeing a lot of each other, we should use this as an opportunity to get to know each other better."
"But, I already know you, Brooke Davis," Jake teased. "You're captain of the cheer-leading squad, student council president, all around social butterfly, fashion queen…shall I go on?"
"Oh, you know what I mean!" Brooke huffed out, crossing her arms over her chest.
Haley laughed, shaking her head. "I think it'll be fun."
"I agree," Lucas spoke up.
"Good," Brooke said with a smile. "Then, it's settled. Friday, 7:30. My house."
Jake smirked as he brought his hands out in front him, cracking his knuckles. "Looks like this is the perfect occasion for me to break out all of the embarrassing stories I have about Brookie here."
Haley turned to Nathan and mouthed "Brookie?" He just shrugged.
Brooke glared. "Don't forget that I have some embarrassing stories about you, too, Jakey."
It was in that moment when Lucas' face lit up. It was like a brilliant realization had come over him. He whipped around to face Jake. "W-wait a minute! Is Brooke..?" He then turned to look at Nathan.
Nathan smirked back at Lucas. He knew exactly where he was going with this. "I think she might be."
Brooke furrowed her eyebrows. "I might be what?"
"Nate, Luke…I swear to God," Jake gritted out, shaking his head as a warning.
"Oh, this is about to be good," Peyton snickered as she closed her magazine.
"All through elementary school and even some of middle school," Nathan began, ignoring the way Jake was motioning for him to cut it out. This was payback for all of the shit Jake had given him about Haley over the past few days. "Jake had a huge crush on this girl, but he never told us who she was."
"He would always sneak away during lunch or recess to see said girl," Lucas picked up where Nathan left off. He smirked when he saw Brooke's cheeks start to turn red. "I think we just figured out who that girl was. He used to call her 'Brookie' and I can't believe I never put it together until now!"
Haley and Peyton both turned to Brooke. They busted out laughing when they saw how red her face was and the way she was avoiding looking at everyone.
"I can't believe I was right," Peyton said through her laughs. "I always knew there was something fishy between the two of you."
Jake jumped up from the table, shooting an apologetic look in Brooke's direction. "I, uh, completely forget that I was supposed to meet with Mr. Harrison about a missing assignment." And with that, he was gone.
"Boys," Haley said with a laugh.
~x~
"Haley, wait up!"
Haley slowed her walking and glanced over her shoulder to see Lucas running towards her. School had let out a few minutes ago and she was almost off campus when she heard Lucas call after her. She smiled when he reached her. "Hey, Luke."
"I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment," Lucas said warily as he stuffed his hands in the pockets of his jeans.
Haley's eyebrows furrowed at the obvious nervous edge to Lucas' voice. He stomach flipped anxiously. "Yeah, of course. What's up?"
"It's about my brother," Lucas rushed on and judging by the look Haley's face, she already figured that's what he wanted to talk about. "How are you guys?"
Haley laughed awkwardly, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. "We're as good as a couple whose only been together a few days can be, I guess."
Lucas chuckled at that. "I swear it feels like you guys have been together for years, not a few days."
"It does feel like that sometimes," Haley said lowly. She studied Lucas' face for a few minutes to see if she could garner why exactly he was talking to her. She didn't really mind. She liked Lucas and she felt like they had a lot in common, it was just weird for him to be talking to her out of the blue like this.
"Nathan told me that he invited you over to my mom's for Thanksgiving."
Haley chewed on the inside of her cheek as her fingers began to nervously wring together. If he was talking to her about this, maybe he didn't want her there. "Y-yeah, he did. My mom's going to be out of town and he felt bad about me being all alone. I don't have to go if you don't want me there."
"Oh, no, that's not it all!" Lucas quickly reassured her. "I would love to have you there. Besides, I'm sure my mom and Keith will be thrilled. I have to warn you though, my mom will probably fall in love with you."
Haley looked down at that, her cheeks heating up. "What makes you say that?"
"Because you make Nathan smile," Lucas admitted sheepishly. "I know it doesn't really seem like it, but my mom is really protective of Nathan. She just gives him his spance. She and Deb were extremely close and I think she feels like she owes it to Deb to watch over Nathan. I don't know if you know this or not, but legally, my mom has custody of Nathan."
Haley's head shot up, her eyes wide with shock. "No, I, uh, didn't know that."
Lucas nodded. "My mom and Deb made each other legal guardians of us kids in case something happened to either of them."
"That's sweet," Haley mumbled. "But, if that's the case, why don't you boys live with her?"
"Nathan lived with us for about a year," Lucas explained. "But, I think living with my mom and Keith was hard on him, even if he hasn't admitted it. I think it hurt for him to see all of us together when he used to have something similar with his parents. That's probably the reason he avoided my mom's café at all costs, too. He won't ever admit that because that's just how Nathan is, but I could tell."
Haley felt her heart ache at Lucas' story. It never seized to amaze her, in a completely terrible way, of how much Nathan had been through. "So, he decided to move out?"
Lucas nodded. "I think my mom knew that he wasn't happy there, because when he sat her down and Keith down, she didn't seem shocked or hurt. She was ready to give him whatever he needed to help him recover. And as much as it killed her to see me go, she knew that Nathan needed me. She didn't even put up a fight when I told her Nathan wanted me to move in with him."
"Your mom sounds like a good woman," Haley complimented.
"She's the best," Lucas agreed. "So, like I said, she'll probably fall in love with you. She sees Nathan as her second son and all she's ever wanted was for him to be happy again."
Haley blushed even harder at the weight of his words. Her heart was hammering in her chest and she couldn't keep the smile off her face, even if she tried. "You've really got me nervous now. I feel like I have some high expectations to live up to now."
"You'll be fine," Lucas said with a chuckle. "But, listen, I also wanted to talk to you because I wanted to thank you."
Haley's eyebrows shot up. "Thank me?"
"For not giving up on Nathan," Lucas asserted. "I know he's not easy to deal with. He's got a lot issues and his mood swings give you whiplash, sometimes. But, I haven't seen him even slightly happy in a long time, but with you…I can see him changing. I was worried that he was never going to recover and he's still not hundred percent the Nathan that he used to be, but I'm starting to see glimpses of him."
"Oh, I can't take credit for that," Haley dismissed. She had to admit that it felt like her heart was soaring. The things that Lucas was saying were rather…heady. "He's changing because he wants to."
"Maybe so, but he never tried to change until you came around," Lucas pointed out. "You gave him a reason to change. So, again, thank you for not giving up on him."
Haley smiled softly at him. Lucas' sincerity shook something deep inside of her. "I couldn't give up on him, even if I wanted to."
~x~
"Come on, Nate, you can drink more than that," Tim said with a snicker as he shoved another shot of Fireball in his face.
Nathan coughed harshly. His eyes were watery and bloodshot. His throat and his stomach were burning with a sharp intensity. He hadn't planned on drinking tonight and he didn't want to either. But when Damien placed the fifth of Fireball and a shot glass in front of him, Nathan knew the topic of not drinking wasn't up for discussion. It didn't seem to matter that Nathan hated Fireball.
Surprisingly enough, drinking made it easier for Nathan to be in that pool house. It dulled all of his senses…it made him numb. The anxiety and dread that he was feeling when he first arrived was slowly melting away. He hated the fact that he needed to depend on alcohol to relax. It was paradoxical situation.
God, he needed to get out of there. And fast.
Every few minutes, he would glance at the clock. It was only eleven. It felt like he had been there for days and he was desperately trying to come up with an excuse to leave. He knew that Lucas was probably wondering where he was. His brain felt like mush and he already knew that trying to come up with an excuse to tell Lucas was going to be futile.
"I see you still aren't a fan of Fireball," Damien said through a series of coughs. He blew the smoke from the blunt he was smoking right in Nathan's fast and he had to resist the urge to cough.
"Fruity drinks really aren't my thing," Nathan choked out, blinking hard to get rid of the fog that had clouded his senses. He didn't know what was more disappointing—the fact that it had taken a good eight shots to feel anything or that fact that it had taken a good eight shots to feel anything.
Damien laughed wholeheartedly and Nathan instantly recognized that laugh. He was high. "I remember the first time I dragged you to a party. Your scrawny ass had one shot of raspberry vodka and puked."
Nathan grimaced at the memory. "I was barely fourteen."
"What a lightweight," Tim goaded Nathan, giving him a shove. "By time I was fourteen, I had the tolerance of a sixty year old alcoholic."
Everyone around them hollered at that and it made Nathan sick to his stomach that they were proud of something like that. He felt even sicker when the voice in the back of his head reminded him that he used to be just like them.
"How did you even get this pussy to join you?" Daunte jumped in. "You never did tell us that story."
Damien laughed before taking another long hit of his blunt. "I was so fucking high the night that I met him. The only thing I remember was some slut was blowing me behind a tree at the court by the river when I heard someone playing basketball. The chick I was with ended up passing out and I was bored, so I went up to him."
Nathan felt his heart begin to hammer in his chest as Damien rehashed how they originally met. He remembered that night vividly. He was only a kid, a stupid and naïve kid. He remembered his initial reaction to Damien's presence was fear. He had heard all of the rumors about him. He was that one senior that you didn't want to mess with. And as an innocent freshman, Nathan let Damien intimidate him and pressure him.
That was one mistake he would be paying for the rest of his life.
"I remember asking Nate if I could join his game." Another cough followed by an unnecessary laugh. "The kid looked at me with such wide eyes. I thought for sure he was going to shit his pants."
Everyone laughed at that and Nathan's fists clenched in his lap. Hearing this story from Damien's point of view made his blood boil. The worst part of it all was that he couldn't blame Damien for what had happened. It was Nathan's choice to go to that damn party. It was Nathan's choice to take the first hit of whatever drug they shoved in his face.
"We played basketball for a while," Damien continued on. "He was damn good. He beat my ass in like ten minutes. It was then I figured he was cool enough to hang out with us. So, I invited him to a few parties. Before I knew it, he became a regular."
Nathan's stomach churned. His throat felt like it was on fire as he fought to keep himself calm. All the memories—the ones that he wished he could erase from existence—hit him at once. He wished to God he could go back in time and take his younger self by the throat. He would scream at him to walk away. How could he have been so stupid?
He wished that he knew why he decided to hang out with Damien, but the fact of the matter was, he didn't have a solid clue. It wasn't some act of defiance. He wasn't trying to prove anything to anyone. He should have walked away the second Damien forced him to take a shot of that cheap raspberry vodka that lasted a whole ten minutes in his system. It was a classic case of a young kid getting mixed it with the wrong crowd and being too prideful to do anything about it.
He really was a selfish bastard.
If things couldn't have gotten any worse, Rachel slid into the seat next to him. He was surprised it had taken her this long to show up. The scent of her cheap perfume made his eyes water and he gritted his teeth when her arm snuck around his neck. "He was the best regular, if you ask me," She purred into his ear.
Nathan gripped her hand and removed it from around his neck. He scooted away from her, but that did little to deter her. In the past, he allowed her to flirt with him. Hell, sometimes he'd even flirt back. Right now, he was hating his past self for that. "Rachel, stop."
"Oh, come on, Nate!" Bear teased with a laugh. "You two have been playing this cat and mouse shit forever. Just fuck and get it over with already. It would be a hell of a way to celebrate. She's crazy in bed."
A smirk spread across Rachel's face and he grimaced when she winked back at Bear. She was the definition of spineless slut. His skin began to crawl when she began to run her fingers up and down his arm. How the hell had he put up with this before? He was two seconds away from jumping out of his own skin.
"N-not gonna happen," He forced out, subconsciously looking around the quickest way out of there. He rolled his eyes when Rachel pouted at him.
"You're the only one in this pool house that hasn't fucked her," Tim roared with laughter. "It's practically initiation at this point."
Nathan's chest felt heavy. He really didn't like where this conversation was going. "Well, it's going to stay that way."
"Boys, boys," Damien chortled. "Nathan's a-one-conquest-at-a-time kind of guy. I can't imagine that life being enjoyable, but to each's own."
"Who's the chick?" Daunte asked.
The mention of Haley was both a good thing and a bad thing. It was a good thing because apparently the only thing that did deter Rachel was the mention of another girl. He relaxed slightly when she finally backed away from him. It was a bad thing because he didn't want anyone else knowing about her. Damien was bad enough.
"Haley James," Damien purred. "She's a real beauty. Nice legs, firm ass, hell of a rack. She's innocent as all hell. So, you know, just my type. Scott's lucky he got to her first."
He was going to snap. He could feel it. This was exactly why he didn't want them talking about Haley. The things they were inevitably going to say about her…there was no way in handle he could handle that.
"Shit, Scott," Tim laughed. "I need to meet this dime piece. Care to make this a competition? I bet I could get her into bed before you."
Without warning, Nathan jumped up from the couch. He needed to get out of there before he did something that would really land him in some deep shit. Mumbling something about going to the bathroom, Nathan made his way away from them. Reaching the bathroom, he slammed the door shut and immediately headed towards the sink. He turned the water to the coldest setting before cupping his hands under the stream, splashing his face.
The cool water felt amazing against his heated skin. His heart was racing and it was taking everything in him to not bolt out of that bathroom and plummet the guys who were talking about Haley so inappropriately. The urge to protect someone as much as he wanted to protect Haley was so new to him that it felt impossible to deal with. Jealousy was also a new feat for him.
Nathan leaned against the bathroom wall, closed his eyes, and took a few deep breaths. Once he felt control over his own body again, he reopened them. It was then that he noticed something lying next to the trash can. It was a white paper wrapper. It reminded him of something that meat from a fancy meat market would be packaged in or…drugs.
Bending down to pick it up, his heart leapt in his throat when he saw what was on the back of packaging. It was Damien's logo. The exact same one that was on that piece of metal Nathan had found. Without wasting another second, he folded the wrapped and stuffed it in his pocket.
All of the agony he had just experienced was made worth it by that little piece of paper.
~x~
It was one in the morning by time Nathan finally arrived home. He was absolutely exhausted, mentally and physically. The alcohol was still coursing through his veins, leaving him with an unwarranted buzz. He felt almost sober and almost back to the safest reality, though. As quietly as he could, he shut the front door and shrugged his jacket off. He froze when the kitchen light clicked on.
"Well, it's about time you came home," Lucas muttered as he leaned against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest.
"I was beginning to think he'd never show," Jake joked dryly and Nathan inwardly groaned. Of course, Lucas had to be awake and Jake just had to be staying over.
"Sorry, I didn't know I had a curfew. Won't happen again, Mom and Dad," Nathan joked lightly as he tried to make his way back to his room.
"Where were you?" Lucas asked shakily. "I tried calling you, but I kept going straight to voicemail."
"Yeah, my phone died," Nathan mumbled. He was starting to get irritated. Lucas never cared when he went out before, why was he suddenly so interested?
"You're avoiding the 'where were you' question," Jake said icily.
Nathan had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach. They were both looking at him with hard eyes and he could see the anger written all over their faces. "I was just out," He said lamely.
Lucas surveyed Nathan and he felt the anger he was feeling increase. His eyes honed in on his red rimmed eyes and flushed face. "You're drunk."
"No, I'm not," Nathan quickly denied.
"Please," Jake scoffed. "I can practically smell the alcohol on your breath."
Nathan clenched his fists. "Okay, so, I had a few drinks. What's the big deal?"
Lucas snapped in that moment. "The big deal is that you went out and had a few drinks, with Damien!"
It suddenly felt like someone had dumped a giant bucket of cold water over him. His heart had stopped beating and he was sure that his skin had turned ghostly white. "I-I don't know what you're talking about," Nathan lamely tried to excuse.
"Drop the fucking act. We saw you," Lucas barked. He was seeing red. The only thing he could feel and focus on was the anger coursing through his veins. He almost died of shock when he saw Nathan turn into Damien's driveway. He couldn't believe what he was seeing.
"What? Were you fucking following me?" Nathan bit back. That was low, even for them.
"Actually, no, we weren't," Jake intervened. "We were heading out to my grandparents' house to pick up the good china for my parents' for Thanksgiving when we happened to see you. Imagine our surprise when you pulled into the driveway of Damien's house."
"I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt," Lucas spat. "I really did. But, then hour after hour passed and you weren't home yet. And now that you're home, you're also drunk." Lucas said that last part with a disdainful laugh.
"Luke, it's not—"
Lucas didn't want to hear it. He continued on anyway. "You know, I thought we were finally moving forward. You've actually been happy. You've actually let someone in. But come to find out, it's the exact opposite."
"No, it's not," Nathan defended. With every word that Lucas spoke, it felt like another knife in his heart. The disappointment and the pain in his eyes made he want to die. "Luke, please."
"I can't believe you would do something like this," Lucas yelled, stepping closer to Nathan. "After everything Damien put you through, you're still going to run back to him? He's the reason that your parents are dead! He's the reason that my father is dead! Have you suddenly forgotten that? God, I bet they're rolling around in their graves right about now."
Angry tears stung in Nathan's eyes. He felt absolutely sick. He'd never felt so many conflicting moments at one time. "It's not what you think, Luke."
"God, I can't even look at you," Lucas ranted on. "I'm ashamed to call you my brother. You can rot in hell for all I care."
"God damn it! Lucas!" Nathan snapped, shoving Lucas away from him and out of his face. "Would you just listen to me for a fucking second, please?"
"Why should I?" Lucas was in his face again. "What kind of low life excuse are you going to give me? Are you back on drugs again? Is that why you've been so happy lately? Is Damien the one getting you your fix?"
Nathan gritted his teeth as his fists clenched at his sides. He knew that Lucas wasn't going to be happy once he found out about this, but he thought that Lucas would at least give him a chance to explain. "How stupid do you think I am, huh?"
"You must be pretty fucked up if you're willing to go back to him."
"Maybe…we should listen to what he has to say," Jake said quietly. He wasn't happy about this new development either, but he didn't believe for a second that Nathan would do this without a solid reason. Jake knew that Nathan's biggest vice was anger, especially when it came to covering things up. The fact that he was trying his hardest to keep his anger under control said a lot more than Lucas probably realized in his own anger induced haze.
Lucas whipped around to stare at him in shock. "You're kidding me, right?"
Jake shook his head. "No, I'm not. It's Nathan, Lucas. Do you honestly believe that he would do something like this without a rhyme or a reason?"
Lucas's lips pressed into a hardline as he looked between Nathan and Jake. After a few moments, he sneered. "You have five minutes."
Nathan nodded as he swallowed thickly. "I'm not really in Damien's group again, he just thinks I am."
"I'm going to need a little more than that."
Nathan took a shaky breath as he made his way over to the couch. Plopping down, he rested his arms on his knees and looked over at them. "He was supposed to come back to school. He had his dad force the school board into allowing him to reenroll. Haley was supposed to be his tutor."
Lucas' features softened very slightly at that. "How the fuck did he manage that?"
"I don't know. It's Damien. He can get anything just by his dad writing a check," Nathan grumbled. "I didn't want him going anywhere near Haley and I knew that he was up to something, so I confronted him about it. He told me that if I agreed to join him again, he would leave Haley alone."
"So, all of this is to keep Haley safe?" Jake asked with wide eyes.
"That's part of it," Nathan admitted. "You don't know how Damien works. If you're with him, he won't go after something that's yours. It's his way of showing respect or some shit like that. I wasn't going to say yes at first. As much as I need to keep Haley safe, I knew there was no way I could go back to him. I was determined to find another way. I would have died if it really came down to it. That was until I found something."
"What'd you find?" Lucas asked.
Nathan stood up and rushed back to his room. Opening his dresser drawer, he grabbed the piece of metal hidden there and headed back. "I found this." He handed the piece of metal over to Lucas.
Lucas ran his fingers over it, his eyes scanning over the symbol. "What is this?"
"It's Damien's business logo, or his signature," Nathan stated. "I found it when I was going through Dad's things."
Jake furrowed his eyebrows as he, too, looked it over. "What does it mean?"
"It's what links Damien to the fire," Nathan declared. "Whatever Damien started the fire with came from that piece of metal. I just have to find a way to connect that symbol to Damien and that piece of metal to the source of the fire. Once I do, I'll go to the police and there's no way he won't be thrown in jail."
"How the hell are you going to do that?" Lucas asked with wide eyes. As Nathan's explanation went on, he could feel the anger slowly dissipating. It was still very much prevalent, but it wasn't controlling him.
"By snooping," Nathan muttered as he reached into his pocket at pulled out the packaging he found earlier. He placed that object in Lucas' hand. "This symbol is everywhere in Damien's office. It's even on the drugs he sends out. No one knows this unless you're someone that Damien trusts, but he keeps a log of every single thing that has that symbol on it. He's anal about. I just need to find that log."
"Do you realize how risky this is?" Jake said with incredulity. "What if Damien catches you going through his things? What if he finds up what you're up to? He might be dense, but he's not that stupid."
"I'll just have to be careful," Nathan murmured. "I know this sounds crazy. I know that it's risky. But, if this is my chance to finally be free, then I'm going to take it."
"You could always pay him the damn money that you owe him," Lucas mumbled icily. As much as Nathan's reasoning made sense, Lucas still had a bad feeling about this. Nothing good ever came from Damien West.
Nathan shook his head. "Even if I did pay him the money, he's not going to go away. I'm not going to let him get away with what he's done. If this works out, then he won't see the light of day again."
"And if doesn't?" Jake said carefully.
"Then, at least I know I tried."
"I don't know about this," Lucas said quietly. "What if you become—"
"I will never be that person again," Nathan cut him off. "I won't make that stupid mistake twice."
"Why didn't you say something sooner?" Lucas asked next.
"I wanted to, I just didn't know how to tell you," Nathan admitted. "I knew you both were going to be pissed."
"Pissed is an understatement," Jake remarked.
"I have to do this," Nathan insisted. "I just have to. Either you're with me or you're against me. Either way, I'm doing this.
Lucas looked at Jake and swallowed hard. He was still beyond pissed. He didn't trust Damien and he didn't think that would ever change. But he did trust Nathan. He could see the determination and the fear in Nathan's eyes. He wasn't backing down, but he was also looking for help. He hated this, he really did. But he couldn't turn his back on Nathan. Neither of them could.
"I guess…we're with you."