They both stared at the wall in front of them, while the silence between them stretched to an uncomfortable length. Despite the seeming comfort that would have looked obvious from the outside, with Kakashi's body still wrapped around Gai's, his head still resting on the bare, muscular chest, both men were deep in their thoughts. Each recognized that they could potentially be at an impasse in their relationship, that one wrong thing said could make or break this new potential that had been introduced to their friendship.
Gai took a deep breath, preparing to speak. He knew Kakashi wouldn't speak first. The man was, after all, an emotional train wreck, and much too smart for his own good. He had probably already imagined the million ways this conversation could go wrong, and knowing his friend's pessimism the way Gai did, he was sure Kakashi hadn't bothered to think about the ways it could go right. That was why Gai had always known Kakashi needed him: they balanced each other out. Kakashi helped him see reason when he got too far into his own idealistic world, and he brought Kakashi out of the darkness and into the realm of possibility.
"Well," Gai started. "The only way this can go is for us to be honest with each other, and ourselves. After all, you wanted that as much as I did. Right, rival?" The hopeful desperation in Gai's voice was enough to break your heart.
Kakashi was silent for a long time, making Gai nervous. He was just about to speak when he heard Kakashi sigh. "As much as I would like to deny it, yes," he said, so quietly Gai thought he had imagined it at first. Gai's heart twinged a little at the reluctance of his friend's admission, but when the silver-haired jonin kept speaking, siting up and shifting so his legs hung over the edge of the bed, he forced himself to listen intently to Kakashi's words. Gai followed him, more to make the conversation seem less one-sided than anything. "As much as I would love to make some excuse about how this is just us experimenting because when we were teens and should have been experimenting like this, we were on the battlefield taking the lives of other teens like ourselves, I can't. Because you're right, we need to be honest with ourselves if we're ever going to figure out what the hell this is. So, I need to accept that whatever this is, I wanted it. I wanted you," he added quietly.
Gai tried not to dwell too much on the warmth in his chest that bloomed at hearing Kakashi say that. Instead, he schooled his features so as not to scare off the flighty jonin. "So, what do we do now?" He used his best shinobi voice, relieved when Kakashi's tense shoulders relaxed at the thought of treating this like a mission.
Kakashi nodded, thinking. "Well, I think that we need to define to each other what this is. I mean, it's not like this is just a one-night stand or anything. We've been best friends for years, and we don't want to lose that just because we got stupid drunk one night and fell into bed together and realized that we really like fucking each other. So, I guess the point that matters here is what we want out of all this. So… would you want to do this again?" he asked, gesturing between them and the bed.
"Yes," Gai answered, quietly but with no hesitation. When minutes had dragged on with no response from Kakashi, he ventured a glance over to the private ninja. "Do you?" he asked, the fear and nervousness obvious in his voice.
Kakashi laughed lightly, and Gai's heart pounded. "You know, Gai, if it were anyone other than you, and I do mean anyone, I would say no. But I have entirely too much respect for you to lie to you. So… yes, I do. I want to do this again."
Gai couldn't contain the smile that spread across his features. "So… does that mean we're in a relationship then?" he asked hopefully, turning his head toward the Copy Ninja, who stared at his lap.
"No," Kakashi said, shaking his head. Gai realized his hands were trembling in his lap. "No, I can't…" he whispered.
"Okay, okay" Gai said reassuringly, putting a comforting hand on Kakashi's shoulder. He had waited a long time for Kakashi to come around before, he could be patient again. And this time, Kakashi's passion for him would be expressed whether he could say it or not in the form of their carnal pleasure, so he was sure it would be even easier to wait this time. "We'll… figure it out as we go. We just need to be open with each other, communicate. Right?"
Kakashi looked at Gai, took in the hopeful expression and optimism that his friend had always contributed to their relationship, and smiled. "That sounds good."
Gai's shoulders relaxed, and after a minute, he let out a huge yawn. "Wow, I didn't realize how tired I was…" he said, and Kakashi chuckled a little.
"Yeah, me too. So, skip the shower and just go to sleep?"
Gai nodded. He lay back down on the bed, and his heart nearly burst with joy when Kakashi resumed his earlier position, curling tightly around his body and nuzzling his unmasked face in Gai's neck. He couldn't resist kissing the top of Kakashi's head, and smiling when he heard a soft sigh of contentment. Curled together, they easily drifted off into a content sleep.
xXx
Gai jerked awake in the early hours of the morning to the sound of the door opening, and his eyes shot open as he scanned the hotel room. It took him a moment to remember the events of last night, but he smiled when the agreement he and Kakashi had come to came to mind. However, his happiness was short lived when he realized that said man seemed to be nowhere to be found. He called out cautiously, hoping Kakashi had snuck into the bathroom to brush away his morning breath like the new… whatever… that they were, but his heart sank when he got no response. He flopped back down to the mattress in disappointment, but found that he couldn't go back to sleep when his normally morning-hating lover had taken off with no indication as to where he had gone.
Gai heaved a sigh, opting to take a shower and wash off the sweat and mess of last night before his lover returned, not wanting to further embarrass his friend by reminding him of their time together, which he clearly regretted, despite their talk afterwards. He cursed himself for allowing them to have such an important conversation while they were still in their post-coital glow. He fought his urge to cry while he showered, knowing that he would not be able to contain his emotion through the end of this mission if he let it go now. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't hear the room door open.
He stepped out of the shower, preoccupied as he toweled himself dry and wrapped the towel snugly around his waist. He took one last quick glance in the mirror as he smoothed his hair, sighed, and stepped out of the bathroom.
Only to find what could only be described as a romantic and exquisite breakfast feast scattered around the room. Every surface was covered in every sort of breakfast food, from rice to fruit to waffles. His eyes widened at the sight, and when they landed on Kakashi standing in the middle of it, smiling with his one visible eye crinkled into a smile as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, tears welled in his eyes. "I didn't know what you were hungry for, but…"
Kakashi's words were cut off with a groan as his new lover tackled him into a bear hug that knocked them to the bed, Gai's weight heavy on top of the smaller man, and he could feel tears soaking the fabric covering his shoulders. He grinned sheepishly as he gently patted Gai's back comfortingly. "Maa… Gai, it's really not that big of a deal…" he said, trying to calm the now blubbering mass of muscled man that was pressed against him, and he could feel his dick twitch interestedly as he allowed his fingers to trail over the still-damp, bare skin of Gai's back.
"No big deal, rival? This… this is the most thoughtful thing you've ever done… and for me… And here I thought you regretted last night…" the larger man blubbered.
At that, Kakashi's fingers paused in their trailing and he looked down at his lover, a frown forming under his mask. "Regretted it? Gai, why would I agree to do it again if I regretted it?" he asked.
Gai pulled back to look at his face, and he blushed. "I don't know, I just… I woke up and you were gone, and I know you have some issues with intimacy…"
Kakashi forced back mild irritation at Gai's lack of faith in him, knowing that - to an extent, at least - he deserved it, and allowed a half-forced chuckle instead. "Gai, I meant what I said last night. I… I know that I'm not exactly Mr. Monogamous, and I don't want you to expect that of me right now, but… I'm not going to say things I don't mean, no matter what the situation. If I say I'm down, I'm down. And if I find myself no longer interested in continuing this, I'll tell you."
His expression was so earnest that Gai burst into tears again, and Kakashi sighed as he pushed against heavy shoulders. "Maa… Gai, the food is getting cold…"
With that, Gai sat up, wiping his eyes and the two of them dug into the hearty breakfast. They were surprised by how hungry they actually found themselves, and Gai couldn't help but blush when he thought of how they had exerted all of their strength. By the time they were both full to bursting, there was little of the feast remaining, and of what they hadn't eaten, most of it was non-perishable, and they packed it away to eat on the rest of their journey.
"So…" Kakashi said, after the last plate had been cleared and they were both showered and packed.
Gai gave the room a final glance, making sure that they hadn't left something behind. He turned to Kakashi. "So, I guess we should get going…" he replied.
"Yeah," Kakashi said, nodding as he stared into the room. After a minute of standing there, silent, he added, "Or…"
Gai turned an interested face towards him, and he looked nonchalant as he continued. "I mean, we did wake up much earlier than anticipated… We don't technically have to be on the road for another two hours…"
Gai raised an eyebrow at his rival. "Oh, really? So, what do you suggest we do?" he asked teasingly. The two stared meaningfully at each other for a moment before dropping their bags and meeting in the middle, lips crashing heatedly against the others as they tugged at clothes and stumbled towards the bed.
When they finally stepped out of the shower two hours later, they were both so tired and sore that they contemplated staying another night, but unwilling to face Tsunade's wrath at arriving at their destination a solid day late, they reluctantly left the haven of their hotel room, sighing sadly as they stepped out the door for the last time.