After eating their satisfyingly subpar meal at the quaint little diner, Linka and Jordan load back up in her little white car.
"Oy…" Linka groans as she assumes shotgun, "Much food. So fat," she jokes as she rubs her bloated tummy.
Jordan amusedly scoffs as she turns the keys in the ignition to start up her ride. "Yeah, you're the same Linka Loud from Royal Woods, that's for sure," she quips. Once the car is started, she does a little stretch before disrobing the red Ace Savvy jacket Linka lended her. "Here, lard-o," she teases as she carelessly drops it on her lap, all while wearing a familiarly taunting sneer.
Linka sticks her tongue out in response before the two ladies buckle their seatbelts and make their way onto the open road.
The drive through the city streets is rather quiet. Jordan concentrates on maneuvering through the hectic evening traffic, and Linka takes the opportunity to relax a little.
She checks her phone for any activity, and is surprised to see a few picture messages from her parents and brothers from Lynn's lacrosse game. Apparently, he won, which brings a smile to his only sister's face. The "we love you" messages sent from everyone help with that too. Too bad her phone is really close to being dead, or she'd make the effort to message back every single one of them.
She puts the phone away in her purse, the one responsible for her being here now, and then checks on her favoritest stuffed bunny.
"You okay, Bun Bun?" she says in her mind. "I hope so."
With that, she leans back, and just lets herself rest as Jordan focuses on driving. The brunette isn't shy about expressing her road rage with various derogatory terms directed at the various other drivers, but Linka doesn't let it bother her. Even if it should.
Maybe it's the waffles settling in her belly, or the exhaustion of a busy day catching up with her; but she just feels at ease. She's safe here with Jordan.
She sneaks a little glance at her friend, who has her eyes diligently glued to the windshield as any good driver should.
In a weird way, she hadn't changed much at all. Taller maybe. Fuller in the face, sure… But, for the first time, Linka recognizes just how attractive she is. How were boys back at Royal Woods not crazier about her? It had to be the dodgeball lodging, because this girl was gorgeous.
Girl Jordan catches Linka staring at her, breaking her of her trance long enough to look away from the road.
"What? Think you could do a better job driving through this crud?" she quips.
Linka just grins, and turns to look out the window.
"You're fine."
"Hey, uh, you awake?" Jordan promptly asks.
It's a good thing too; because Linka was falling asleep. She shakes herself, "Huh? Whuh?" she lets out.
She meets Jordan with a baffled expression for a moment as the other girl responds with incredulousness, then a familiar entertained roll of the eyes.
"Sorry if I'm not one for conversation right now," Jordan says before scrunching up her face with mock confusion. "Did I just apologize to you? Eww."
Linka chuckles. "It's okay. I'm just tired after today… And don't ever apologize to me again… Unless you want me to punch your boob, skeeter bites," she teases.
"Guffaw," Jordan responds. "Your boobs aren't much, either. And don't forget; I could totally roundhouse you."
"Would you though?" Linka asks, the smile still encroached on her face.
Jordan thoughtfully studies her for a moment. "Probably not. But you probably deserve it."
"Well, you're probably right," Linka agrees. "Just promise me it will kill me if you do."
"Ow. Cynical," Jordan jokes.
Linka looks down to her lap. It was cynical, and of course she didn't mean it. But dang, life was hard lately. And with school getting progressively more strenuous, and losing time for friends and family that would all be living their lives without her…
She realizes, this must be how Jordan felt.
At least, she selfishly sort of hoped so. It would make resenting her leaving four years ago a little harder.
"Now THAT was cynical…"
With the moment's silence, Linka directs her sight out at the world beyond the glass of the windshield. It's darkening out now, and they're on an unfamiliar backroad.
She blinks as she tries to wrap her head around the changes, and then digs into her purse for her phone with its dying ass battery.
It's rolling around 8:30 already. Dang!
"Jordan… Who turned out the lights?" she thinks aloud.
"Huh? Oh. I took the long way home. You did say you weren't in any hurry to get back," she answers with little confidence.
"That's fine, I guess," Linka belatedly says with a little chagrin.
"I'm sorry," Jordan sincerely apologizes. "I just hated driving through that traffic. We'll be back at the dorms in like, twenty minutes," she assures her.
Linka takes a calming breath. "It's fine. Seriously. I really don't have much going on tonight," she explains, almost shamefully. "I'll probably just curl up with a comic and go to bed. I'd say I'd eat dessert, but…"
Jordan meets her with a sympathetic gaze as she lets those words linger.
"Sorry again about those two jerks. And about your groceries," she tells Linka.
Linka brushes her off with a careless wave. "It's fine," she says once more. "It could have happened to anybody."
Jordan carefully considers her rebuttal. "Well, I guess so. But you should be more careful."
"What do you mean?" Linka inquires.
"I mean, no offense, because I know you're new to the city and all; but stuff like this happens a lot. Especially to girls like you," Jordan answers.
Linka furrows her brow. "What are you saying? Like, I instigated it?"
"No, but you're just… delicate," Jordan tells her. "Like, I dunno. You carry around that big purse and wear those nice clothes, and people think they can take advantage of you."
She waits a moment before adding, "I'm just saying I don't think you should go out on your own anymore."
Linka can feel her heart starting to race with the sudden attack, but she tries to keep cool. "She has a point," she tells herself. Even so…
"Well… It's not like I have anyone. My brothers are miles away, I don't have a boyfriend, and I don't even have friends here," she tells Jordan.
"Well… I mean… What am I? Chopped liver?" Jordan cautiously responds.
It all catches up with Linka. Jordan was actually suggesting that she could be the person Linka could rely on. She could be the one to go the market with her, and be her friend, and be depended upon like the way things used to be.
Could she though? Sure, she was being nice now, and she did buy her that so-bad-it-was-good dinner… But… this was all moving too fast. The last four years happened. Jordan wasn't there. And now she just was again.
Finally, Linka breaks her silence. "No, you're not. But we also haven't seen each other in a long time."
Jordan just takes a moment to let the words sink in before responding.
"Yeah, it has been a long time… But, that doesn't mean we're not still friends?"
Linka sighs. "We are friends. But…"
She pauses. She can feel herself growing more anxious, almost like she has to build a birdhouse for Mrs. Johnson again.
"But what?" Jordan eggs on, all of the playfulness having escaped her now.
Finally, Linka just says it. "Things change, Jordan. We're different people now," she begins. "Over the last four years, you hardly made any effort to call or text. And when you did, it was just… weird. It didn't feel right."
Jordan narrows her eyes as she tries to wrap her head around what's being said to her.
"Okay?" she scoffs. "Uhm, you didn't exactly put your best foot forward either? You could've tried harder to stay in touch with me too, ya know?"
Linka weighs Jordan's argument. It makes her feel guilty, perhaps rightfully so.
"You're right, it was just... hard… You have to understand, one moment I had my best friend, and the next, I didn't," Linka defends. "And you just seemed like you were fine without me. I don't know. I guess I gave up trying at some point…"
Jordan says nothing for a moment. Eventually, she's able to muster something out, though.
"Hey, I didn't have to stop everything I was doing to help you out back there with Shrek one and two, but I did. And hey, I'm sorry that I couldn't just decide to not move with my parents, okay?" she excitedly retorts before hunching in her driver's seat, almost pathetically. "I guess this is a crummy way of trying to repay you for the last four years… But dang it, I'm trying…"
The words cut like a knife. "Nice going, Linka," she scolds herself. "Way to just totally kill the mood."
She sighs. Maybe there was still a little hope. Maybe this conversation just needed to happen so they could move past it.
"Jordan, I'm sorry," Linka begins. "I'm sorry for everything. For the way things happened, for always being a crappy friend, for not being there-"
"Linka," Jordan cuts in with a deflated tone of voice. "It's okay. I get it… I was angry too. I still kind of am, actually," she admits. "I hated leaving Royal Woods. I hated leaving you…"
She focuses solely on the task of driving now as she continues.
"You weren't a crappy friend. Far from it actually… Don't get me wrong; I was never one for these mushy kinds of talks. But… We had a lot of fun. You were one person in my life who always made me smile."
She actually looks to Linka now, who can only watch with a degree of apprehension as the other girls lays it on thicker.
"I guess I should've realized it wouldn't last forever…" she says, the somber air around her weighting the entire car.
She goes back to just driving, and Linka considers everything that was just said to her. No jokes, no teasing. Just a level of truth and sincerity that was foreign to the one she called Girl Jordan.
In a way, it was weird. It was strange. This kind of behavior would have made her cringe as an eleven year old Linka Loud.
But, today… right now… It feels right. It feels good. Sure, she could spoil it by saying something stupid about her knee high socks or the bow in her hair, but she decides to just… let this happen...
"I guess I should have, too," Linka admits. "I don't know. Things were just so much easier as kids. We didn't have so much…" she says, trying to find the best way to phrase herself.
Jordan cops half a smirk. "Existential dread and a feeling of never ending restlessness?"
Linka nods an almost impressed little nod. "Cynical."
"Thank you, I try my best," Jordan jokes before getting serious again. "Linka…"
The two girls share a mutual gaze now, and the somber air changes into something else. Something a little more clean, a little more intimate. Whatever it was, it was exciting for Linka.
"I'm glad I found you. I really am," Jordan finishes with a warm smile.
Linka smiles back. "Me too," she simply says.
The gaze lasts a little while longer, and it would seem Jordan tries to draw it out and savor as she slowly pulls herself away from it to return her eyes to the road. And even then, she has to look out the corner of her eye back to the white haired passenger, the same warm smile radiating on her face.
Linka finally looked away too as she wandered her eyes anywhere else. Things were different, sure. And they'd probably never be the same as when they were eleven or fourteen.
That didn't mean they couldn't be better though.
9:00 PM is looming as the two girls arrive at the girls' dormitory of Great Lakes Academy. The night has nearly fallen as the moon begins to shine brightly in the blackening starlit sky.
It's Monday night, so unsurprisingly, everyone else is inside, likely staring at computer screens and hoping their projects and assignments would just do themselves. Sadly, they won't.
Jordan locks up her pimpmobile, and leads the way for Linka to follow her with her notorious purse and fluffy bunny in tow. It's quiet, and it's quite warm for this time of night. No need for that Ace Savvy jacket in Jordan's possession.
Still, she'll need to ask for it back eventually, or simply hope that she'll offer to return it. The latter is optimal for a less awkweird experience.
Because, where was this all going? Was Jordan just going to act like they were the bestest of pals again and hold on to her jacket for a week? Did she think Linka wouldn't mind? Did Linka mind? Why was she worrying so much about a stupid jacket?!
"Hey," Jordan says to break the silence, as well as Linka's doubt induced trance.
She looks to the other girl, who is taking the jacket off now. Of course she is…
"Here, you probably want this back," she says.
Yes, it's convenient. Linka wouldn't have to worry (even more) about how and when she'd get her Ace Savvy jacket back, or what it would mean for their friendship. But, in a weird way, she was sort of disappointed. She'd still have to wait and see just what was happening here; what was going through Jordan's head, where tonight was going, where everything was going!
Why though? Why was she so worried in the first place?
"Uhm, thanks," she says as she accepts her jacket back, and she ties it around her waist for safekeeping. She was suddenly feeling hotter. Definitely no need to wear it now.
When she looks back up to Jordan, she sees her making her way over to a nearby picnic table to have a seat. She… wasn't going inside?
Linka stands there for a moment, baffled and beside herself. For something as simple as coming home from a car ride, she's awfully flabbergasted right now.
Even so, what is she supposed to do? Come out and say how she's feeling? As if.
Instead, she somewhat nervously stands there, kicking up an untainted spot of grass beneath her sneaker and trying to think of maybe using her mouth words to engage in some conversation with her companion.
Luckily, Jordan speaks up first. "This is weird," she states as she coolly leans back against the table.
"Uhm… What's weird?" Linka timidly asks, internally praying for the best.
"There's no one else out here," Jordan answers, still facing forward.
"Oh," Linka simply rebuts, still feeling… awkweird…
Jordan finally looks to her again, and suspiciously squints her eyes to study her. "Well by all means, Girl Linka. Stand there by yourself all evening. No places to sit out here. Nope. No flat surfaces for your flat butt anywhere to be seen."
"Heh, sarcasm noted," Linka somewhat nervously says, but she puts her big girl panties on to go take a seat on the table by her friend… who just referred to her as "Girl Linka."
Jordan softly smiles as she does, and Linka can't help but feel a little flustered. They used to get this close all the time, and it was no big deal. But right now, it felt a little odd.
"Maybe I'm just overthinking things like I always do," Linka tells herself.
For a moment, the two girls are quiet. They simply look out to the night around them, taking in its serene splendor.
Maybe Jordan was tired. She didn't get to sleep in the car after all. Then again, maybe she had things or her mind. Maybe the same things as Linka.
But she still wasn't going to ask.
Even so, she could only handle the silence for so long. Maybe living with so many siblings in a place called the Loud house indoctrinated her to appreciate noise.
Or maybe she just felt insecure about not being a good conversationalist.
"Or maybe I really am just overthinking everything."
She clears her throat, and begins to speak. "So…"
The ultimate icebreaker. They were certain to discuss all sorts of grand and interesting topics now.
"I was thinking," Jordan begins, almost disregarding Linka's 'So.' "What were things like after I left R-Dubs?" she asks, the soft smile she had waning from her face.
It wasn't the change of pace Linka was expecting, but she decides to roll with it. Anything to drown out the sound of crickets chirping.
She thinks over how to respond. Where did she begin? A lot of things happened. Luke hooked up with Carl Pingrey of all people. Zoey, Riley, and Lia all managed to get prom dates with girls they weren't related to. Leif had to have surgery for a cholesteatoma, and Loki had to have surgery for… his "bean toots" problem.
But would Jordan really care about those things? What if she was just asking for the sake of showing she actually cared? What if she didn't care? But then, why would she bother asking? What if she-
"Are you there, Linka? It's me, Margaret," Jordan quips.
"Huh?" Linka mumbles. "Oh… Uhm… I don't know…"
"Wow Linka. You used people words. Congrats. You've earned a nice cry in the shower later," she thinks.
Jordan is thoughtfully quiet again, but not for long.
"Did people talk about me?" she asks.
"Huh," Linka blurts out. She realizes all too late that it sounded a little rude, like she couldn't believe Jordan would try and ask a legitimate question about something besides VoM. But Jordan doesn't say anything, so she doesn't make a big deal of it either.
She finally composes a somewhat decent answer.
"Well, the girls asked about you sometimes. Steve did every now and then," Linka answers.
"That Otto kid always joked with Alex about 'shipping' us," Jordan recalls with some amusement.
"Yeah he did," Linka simply says, feeling her lips curve into a small smile.
"I probably should've given him a chance. He was cute," Jordan wistfully adds.
"You and everyone else thought so," Linka guffaws, earning an inquisitive look from Jordan.
Great. What did she say wrong now?
"Really? Did everyone include you, Linka Loud?" Jordan teasingly asks.
Linka feels herself blush a bit. Steve was a cute boy. A few years ago, she'd never admit that to Jordan, but it wouldn't hurt anyone now.
"It did," she answers, preening a hair behind her ear with a little fluttering in her heart.
Jordan just smiles at her for a moment, and then looks forward again. Deciding she's nice and comfortable, she lets herself lay back on the table to face skyward.
"Well. That's good to know. I was half convinced you're gay," she tells her.
Linka playfully scoffs. "Excuse you? If anyone's gay, it's you Ms. 'Look at all my Delinquent Art favorites of Griselda fan art.'"
Jordan laughs at Linka's razzing. if there was one thing about Jordan she didn't have to worry about, it was her taking a joke.
The casual conversation helps ease the girl's troubled mind. Maybe there isn't so much to worry about and overthink after all.
With that, she makes herself comfortable too, and decides to lie back and enjoy the night sky with Jordan.
Linka rests her head on her hands, then glances at Jordan- who glances back, before doing just that.
The sky… it's beautiful.
"So… Let me ask you something else," Jordan begins, still looking to the sky just as Linka does.
"Sure," the white haired girl belatedly replies.
There is a pause on Jordan's behalf as well. "Did you have any boyfriends?"
It catches Linka off guard, so much so that she has to look back to the other girl again. Jordan looks back too, almost anxiously with her demeanor.
"Boyfriends?" Linka slowly utters out, carefully.
"Yeah. Boyfriends," Jordan repeats. "Not like, you know; just crushes or whatever. But like, someone special?"
"Well… Truthfully…" Linka starts, but before she can even muster any more words, Jordan cuts her off.
"I knew it. Canon lesbian confirmed," the pretty little girl with the bow in her hair ripostes.
She smiles a charming smile, the kind that lets Linka know she just wants to have fun.
So she just smiles too. "More like canon socially awkward," she admits, eyeing her feet so she doesn't have to look at Jordan anymore.
Jordan just looks at her for a moment before looking back to the stars.
"You'll find someone. You just need to give yourself a little more credit," she tells Linka.
She isn't even sure how to respond. Sure, Jordan was probably right, but that also meant she would have to make an effort to give a guy a chance.
It wasn't happening anytime soon. She'd thought about it enough to know she was content reading comic books and messing around on fandom pages during her free time.
Well… most of the time, anyway.
She wasn't so weird that she'd kill this conversation though. She was more tactful than she… gave herself credit for…
"What about you?" she chooses to respond with. "Any knight in shining Under Armour come your way?"
Jordan stays silent. She doesn't even offer the girl a glance.
Which, makes Linka nervous again. What did she say wrong? Did she not make it obvious this was all in good fun?
Finally, Jordan takes a deep breath, then begins.
"I just wish things would've been different, Linka. I thought about you every day. Heck… I was thinking about you this morning," she says with a little smirk.
It didn't answer Linka's question. In fact, it just added more.
But, it was fine. An effort was being made to open up. Linka wouldn't forsake that with everything today had thrown at her.
Especially considering she had thought of her just the same.
"Uhm… What were you thinking about?" she timidly asks.
Jordan takes another deep breath, and then spritely sits up. The way she jolts up so quickly startles Linka, and it's even weirder how Jordan just stares at her now.
She looks back to her with confused, concerned eyes. "Are you high?" she bluntly asks.
Jordan just smiles. It's a wicked smile though. The troublemaking one she'd don before a game of dodgeball, or before starting a food fight, or before… before…
"Don't look at me."
No way… She wasn't. Not now…
"What?!" Linka retorts.
"Don't look at me, Linka. Don't look at me," Jordan repeats, gluing her brazen brown eyes on her freckled pale face.
Yup. It was happening. A good ol' fashioned game of Don't Look at Me. Their last game was four years ago during a nativity scene reenactment of all things; one that saw Linka doing her best as Mother Mary not to look at bearded wiseman in Jordan. It was easily the hardest time she ever had not laughing in church.
It was a game where the rules didn't change, and they were simple. You don't look at the other person, and they make you look like an idiot all the while.
And while Linka invented the game that afternoon after detention, it was Jordan who became the champion of it.
WIth hawk eyes, she leans in close to Linka, mere inches to her face, boring a hole into her with her gaze.
Linka has to laugh. Jordan… was such an idiot.
"Are you really doing this?" she replies with a little grin, trying to look to her lap and not Jordan's buggy brown eyes.
"It's not up to me, Linka. It's up to you," she tells her. "Are you gonna look at me?"
Linka thoughtfully nods her head, and takes a breath. Defiantly, she turns her head opposite to Jordan, facing off into the night at nothing in particular.
Jordan playfully furrows her brow before lip syncing the words "It's on."
She jumps off the table, and hurries her way into Linka's line of sight. Linka looks away again, and Jordan just keeps putting her face into hers, all while repeating, "Don't look at me. Don't look at me, Linka!"
"Will you stop being a doofus!" Linka ribs as she tries looking away, but Jordan keeps finding her way into her bubble.
Finally, Linka decides to get off the table. Maybe she could escape her gaze by walking away.
Nope. Jordan just keeps coming after her, flashing her complexion as much as she can, to Linka's chagrin. The poor white haired youth finds herself spinning around like a weathervane. Everywhere she looks, Jordan's there, saying those same taunting four words.
"Don't look at me."
Yeah, it was ridiculous. But, she couldn't stop laughing. It was easily the most amusement she'd gotten since moving to Great Lakes City, and it was all because of stupid Jordan and stupid Don't Look at Me.
"I'd look at you if you weren't so ugly," Linka tries to quip, but it was moot. Jordan had her in the palm of her hand.
"That's not stopping me, though. So don't look at me," Jordan rebuts.
"That makes no sense?" Linka guffaws.
"What makes no sense is how you wanna look at me. Don't," Jordan keeps going.
"Oh my gosh," Linka laughs, burying her flushed face in her hand as she continues trying to avert Jordan's gaze.
Unfortunately, all the laughter makes it hard for her to concentrate on activities of daily living, such as walking normally. She staggers, and ends up tripping over her own feet and falling into the grass.
"Woah!" she hollers.
"Linka!" Jordan worriedly cries, hurrying to her aid. She kneels beside her, and Linka picks her head up to rattle off some of the blow.
"I'm okay. Just… some annoying loser made me fall," she jokes while rubbing her head.
Jordan just sneers at her for a moment before extending her hand to help her friend up.
Linka accepts it, but Jordan doesn't pull. She just keeps staring.
Linka deflates. She knows what's coming…
"Don't look at me," Jordan says again with a shiitake eating grin on her face.
Linka concedes. She already had grass stains on her butt, what more did she have to lose?
"No you," she simply states, and it's enough for Jordan to take the hint. She had won. She could carve a mark of victory on her imaginary carving wall.
With that, she helps Linka to her feet, and Linka dusts herself off before fixing her posture and looking at Jordan.
She stands there with an endearing smile on her face, her glossy lips and irises now iridescent with the moonlight. Her hair looks golden, her teeth look pearly white. Her skin is flawlessly fair, and those brown eyes of hers look back to her in the most charming way. It all made it so easy to remember what she loved about her to begin with; she was just damn good company.
And it's like this for a short while. They had outgrown the laughter, but it didn't stop Linka from feeling this warmth inside of her. For the first time in a long time, she didn't feel alone. And for the first time in years, she didn't feel like Jordan was missing.
If anything, she felt like they were kids again. Laughing, playing, just enjoying each other's company.
But she also feels… like things were better. They had grown up. They could still do all the great things they did back then, but they could do more. They could talk about things, they could trust each other, they could just… look at each other the way they were now.
It's a new and exciting feeling Linka isn't sure she's ever felt, but she doesn't want it to go away either.
Eventually though, Jordan deeply inhales, then slowly exhales. She chuckles a little chuckle afterwards, and so does Linka, who also nervously rubs the back of her neck.
"So…" Jordan now says. Linka finds it somewhat funny, but she also isn't sure what to say back besides…
"So?..."
"We should probably get inside, huh?" Jordan suggests, still smiling.
While she was still uncertain about a great many things going on in her life right now, Linka was sure of one thing.
She could get used to seeing a lot more of Girl Jordan's smile.
"Sure. Lead the way," she answers.
No needlessly sardonic author's notes today. Just thanks for reading, and please stay tuned for more.