Linka didn't take much with her to Great Lakes Academy. She packed her clothes, her laptop, and a bookbag full of Ace Savvy literature. Everything else she bought in the city.
Being here with Jordan though, she thought a lot about a piece of home she wish she could have taken with her.
It was a novelty sign Rita bought at a yard sale, and it read the following: A friend is someone who will come bail you out of jail. A true friend will be there beside you saying "Man, that was fun!"
Every time she saw it, she couldn't help but think of Girl Jordan. She was just the kind of girl that didn't shrink in the face of a good time, and she was also very blunt with her words.
At least… when it came to Linka Loud.
"Wow. It's like someone robbed the great value section of Walmart and stowed it all away here," Jordan comments regarding the contents of Linka's pantry.
Linka was finally home after an excruciatingly long Monday. It could've been a lot worse, but it also could've been a lot better. Bun Bun was safe, she didn't get her purse stolen, and Jordan was here with her… She also didn't have any groceries.
"But then they let it all expire and go stale after eating fifty Nutella sandwiches," Jordan continues as she investigates the kitchen of her friend's dorm, noticing a half eaten jar of the stuff on the counter by a nearly finished loaf of bread.
That was Girl Jordan. Where so called friends would come and go, offering casual conversations about anything from movies to gossip, Jordan preferred systematically critiquing every imperfection Linka displayed like she was the woman of the hour at a roast.
Being the weirdo she was, Linka liked it that way. She also dished it out as well as she could take it when the opportunity presented itself.
Unfortunately, it was hard to find opportunity when Jordan was on a roll. Like she is now.
"Wow. I suddenly know what to get you for your birthday. A shoe rack," she starts. "Not because you leave your freakishly big shoes all over the place like some barn animal, but so your guests can have somewhere to sit besides the pitiful excuse that is your couch."
Linka was also getting a little hungry. She may have had a big dinner, but a Nutella sandwich did sound good right now.
"Seriously, where did you get that thing? Silent Hill?" Jordan jokes.
And she had to make sure she had everything in her purse. She'd checked a few times already, but after today, she was still a little neurotic.
"I feel like if I sit down on it; it will literally swallow me whole, and then regurgitate me."
Bun Bun was okay, that was a relief.
"The best case scenario is that it kills me. Then I won't have to see anymore of your crap dorm."
Linka was getting a little sleepy too.
"What's that smell?"
And tired of Jordan's snark…
"Jordan," Linka finally says, showing that she's unamused with and grimace at the other girl.
Said other girl meets her with brief incredulousness. Maybe she's running out of steam.
"It stinks in here!" she belatedly adds, imitating Rocky Balboa.
Or not.
Linka groans as she falls back on the floor she's seated on.
"What are you doing?" Jordan asks with a chuckle.
"Maybe if I just lay here and pretend to be dead, your tiny brain will be tricked, and you'll leave," Linka answers.
Jordan rolls her eyes. "Oh come on. You know I'm just messing around."
"I know…" Linka pitifully moans. "I'm just tired. And hungry…"
Jordan takes a melodramatic deep breath as she trudges over to the couch she said such lovely things about, and plops herself down on it. She finds the broken off clip of a mechanical pencil, and tosses it at Linka, who doesn't even respond.
"Well, I know you have white hair, but I'm not letting you go to bed early like some grandma," Jordan tells her. She then fixes her posture to sit up straight, and leans her elbows on her lap so she can look at her friend. "I can enable your eating disorder I guess, though."
"Pfffft. What eating disorder? Stomaching your crap?" Linka ripostes.
"No. The one where you stuff literally anything else in your face," Jordan answers.
"Insert obvious joke here," Linka utters.
"Come on," Jordan tells Linka, leaving over to coerce Linka into getting off the floor.
"Let me die in peace," Linka whines, trying to resist.
"Linka, I'm not gonna let you be a lame-o and sit around here all night acting like Lars," Jordan tells her. "We're going back to my dorm."
Linka puts aside her pseudo-petulance to get serious. "Really?" she asks.
"Yes!" Jordan responds, almost baffled. "At least there we can find something better to do than smell... whatever that is," she quips with a complementing gesture.
Linka rolls her eyes, and considers what sort of derogatory thing to call Jordan. Maybe she'd attack her secret mole…
"Besides. You gotta eat something besides Nutella. We'll order a prizza or something," Jordan tells her as she stands back up to get ready.
Linka decides her mole isn't as important as food. "Alright. Prizza does sound good," she concedes.
A few halls down from Linka's room is Jordan's. The two girls walk together there, actually keeping their smart-aleck comments to themselves for once.
Normally, Linka liked to keep a comfortable distance between the people she walked with. She didn't even really appreciate Claudia or her brothers getting so close to her personal bubble.
But she didn't realize until she was halfway through the corridor that she and Jordan were walking side by side, a lot like they used to do when walking home from school.
They walked home from school a lot. And, bittersweetly, it was so long ago, but didn't really feel like it. At least not now, anyway.
They finally arrive to a door reading 127, and Jordan stops before it. She digs into her purse to grab a set of keys, and ruffles through them with squinted eyes.
"Uh… Let's see…"
Linka grins. It's always fun to see Jordan like this. For as much confidence as she projected, she was still capable of flaws just like everyone else. Such as taking forever to do menial tasks.
Linka lets out a mockingly loud yawn while doing a sardonic stretch, earning her a brief scowl from Jordan.
"Shut up. I have a lot of keys," she curtly tells her.
"For what?" Linka teasingly asks.
"Well, my car. My door… If I could ever find the ding dang thing," Jordan answers.
Linka feels a warm feeling come over her. "You said 'ding dang,'" she says with a smile.
"Yeah, I've always said ding dang. So?"
"Dad always says ding dang," Linka explains.
An unsure expression comes to Jordan's face as she momentarily pauses, and then she cops half a smirk before continuing. "Yeah. That was OG Lynn's thing, huh?"
The two fall into silence for a moment, and Linka just enjoys the warm, nostalgic feeling to herself. Jordan still said "ding dang…"
"I'll have to come see the Big Bald Head sometime," Jordan adds before proudly displaying the key she fought tooth and nail to find with a smile.
Linka just smiles back before the other girl turns around to unlock her door and open it for the two of them to step inside.
She does so, and swings it open to reveal the contents of her dorm with a sarcastically excited expression. "Tada!"
Linka just smiles at her silliness, and her unintentional display of respect for OG Lynn. "Yeah, you will," she tells her to respond to her previous statement.
Linka is first to make her way inside. She takes a second to look around at her surroundings and take them in. Much like her own dorm, it isn't the homiest place. Jordan likely had about as much time as she did to get settled in this semester with work, school, and trying to cram Fletnix and "prizza" in as much as possible. And in Jordan's case, cringey VoM fanfiction… Gross…
Still, Jordan had two things Linka did not have. One: a designated place to put shoes. Two: food.
"Mi casa es su casa," Jordan tells her guest before kicking her shoes off beside the door.
"Heh, I guess Ronaldo rubbed off on you too? Do you have any original material?" Linka quips while looking back to her.
"Nope. Steal everything from people on the internet," Jordan happily answers.
Linka giggles, and then takes it upon herself to take her own shoes off. She has to actually untie the ding dang things though, so she takes a seat on the floor and gets to it.
"Those really are some sick kicks," Jordan compliments while stepping over Linka, brushing her leg against her forehead on purpose like a fat stinky jerk. That was just Jordan though. Even the compliments had to have some sort of ribbing to them, verbal or physical.
Linka just blows to fix her hair, and focusing on untying her Ace Savvy chucks. "Thank you, Jirl Gordan."
"My pleasure Linka Loud," Jordan responds as she steps into the kitchen to plug her phone into the charger. She then starts scrolling through it, leaning herself over the counter as she does.
"So what do you wanna do for dinner? I'm kind of in the mood for Chinese, actually," Jordan asks.
"Bluck! You know I hate Chinese!" Linka complains.
"Oh, okay. You'll eat peanut butter sauerkraut sandwiches, but not Chinese?" Jordan guffaws.
"No way! I'm not eating cat and dog," Linka jokes.
"First off, that's ethnocentrism. Get with the times you bigot. Secondly, what's wrong with eating a little pussy?" Jordan says with a cringey smile.
Linka feels her cheeks redden. "I walked into that one…" she admits.
"I take pride in my wordplay," Jordan says before returning to her phone. "Seriously though. What are we gonna eat?"
"I thought you said we were getting prizza?" Linka reminds her.
"Yeah. but if we do, I'm getting all the stuff I like on it. And there won't be a single pineapple on it, I tell ya h'what," Jordan says, slipping into a silly hillbilly accent.
Linka rolls her eyes. "Okay, no pineapple. But get it without cheese, and throw everything else you can on it. Like normal people do," Linka says, going for the kill.
Jordan just sourly purses her lips as Linka looks back to her with amusement on her face.
"At least I don't dip mine in barbeque sauce like some foolish knaves," she rebuts.
"Do you have barbeque sauce?," Linka tells her, finally standing up after getting both of her shoes off.
"Got you, babe," Jordan says with a little kiss before ringing up the local pizza joint.
Linka just smiles to herself as she goes into the living area to make herself comfortable. The fact that Jordan was calling her cutesy names again too only helped her mood.
Much like her own dorm, there wasn't much space for wild partying, or even mild partying, really. There was a bedroom, a bathroom, and this decently diminutive living room that bled into the kitchen.
She had a TV that was connected to a laptop, which was probably almost dead (Jordan was notoriously inconsiderate of her technology), and a little couch with a little end table.
The best part was… the couch was almost exactly the same as her own.
"Oh! Oh!" Linka hollers with excitement, causing Jordan to rush into the room.
"What?" she anxiously asks with a phone against her ear, placing her hand on the speaker to block the cacophony.
"Look at this ridiculously crappy couch," Linka begins, pointing out the furniture.
Jordan just scowls at her before going back to her business, but Linka decides she hasn't had enough fun.
"This looks like the couch you buy at the beginning of a new Sims game when you only have 200 dollars! I feel like if I dropped crumbs on it, a million rats would come out and start flocking towards them!" she shouts to Jordan.
"Very funny, Linka," Jordan simply responds from the other room.
Linka laughs a little to herself before inviting herself to have a seat on the quip worthy couch. Despite her witticisms, she has to admit to herself that it feels really nice to sit back and unwind after a Monday like this.
She rests her eyes for a moment, allowing images of her family and loved ones to come to her mind's eye. Usually around this time of night, she'd get on her webcam or her phone and begin to message them. Some nights she would put off homework to make sure she talked to all ten of her brothers, both her parents, Pop Pop on a good day, and maybe even find time for Claudia and Ronaldo.
But never Jordan. At least, not recently…
The first few weeks after she and her family had to leave for the city, she would call, she would text, she would do what she could. Heck, she'd even check on those dumb fanart and fanfiction accounts to comment on her comments. Just because it showed she cared.
But, it slowly stopped. More time spent hanging out with Claudia, going to family events, starting jobs, worrying about cars… boys…
In the midst of beating herself up, Jordan interrupts her to come in with a little plastic bowl. She plops herself down on the couch beside her, and lets out a hardy yawn as she stretches. She is so graceful.
Linka cringes, and scoots over a bit for her. "Jeez, tubby."
"Bite my braid," Jordan quips before taking a lemon wedge out of her bowl, and taking a bite of it. She doesn't squint, she doesn't flinch, she just stoically gnaws into the citrus like some sort of freak, and Linka twinges all the while.
Jordan looks at her with evident confusion. "What?" she asks with a cheek full of lemon wedge.
"What do you mean 'What?'" Linka retorts. "Who eats just a plain lemon wedge?"
"I put sugar on it," Jordan reasons. "Who are you to judge anyway, Ms. plain ketchup is good with everything?"
Linka takes the pillow she's resting by, and carefully smacks Jordan in the knee with it before hugging it in her arms. "You suck," she simply states.
"Well, I think the pillow would agree lemons go great with white stuff," Jordan cleverly tells her friend.
They share a little laugh, but then it gets quiet. Both girls lean their heads back, and happen to yawn at the same time.
"Dang," Jordan comments.
"We're getting old," Linka adds.
"Speak for yourself, grandma," Jordan ripostes.
And for a little while afterwards, the two sit in absolute silence. Not an awkward silence, but a tired silence. One for the sake of recharging batteries, and resting their arsenal of snappy comebacks.
But for Linka, there's also this looming guilt. Maybe it was just her fault that things didn't work out so well. She could have tried harder to stay in touch. Why didn't she?
"Hey, creepy," Jordan says to break the silence. Linka looks over to meet the brunette's tired eyes. "You uh… You gonna bounce after you eat all my pizza?" she asks.
This wasn't usual Jordan sarcasm. This was advanced Jordan sarcasm. The kind that said, are you leaving or staying? I won't just outright ask you, because then I'd have to show my… *shivers* true feelings!
For some reason, all Linka can do is stare and say nothing. It's the same childish fear she felt outside the dormitory, the same fear she felt during the silences of their car ride, the same fear she felt… trying to talk to Jordan after she left.
…
Finally, she has to say something.
"Do you want me to stay?" she asks.
"I mean… You can…" Jordan answers with a hint of her usual persona.
Linka fixes her posture so that her whole body is now facing Jordan, and she sits up straight. Jordan just looks to her with some apprehension. It was about to get real.
"No, seriously. Do you want me to stay?" Linka repeats. "Like, no jokes or anything. What are we doing?"
Jordan raises a confused brow. "Uhm… Waiting for pizza?"
Linka groans. "Ugh… No, you don't get what I'm asking."
"You're right. I don't," Jordan says, and she puts her bowl of lemon wedges on the coffee table before positioning herself to face Linka now too.
Linka leans back, defeated. "Jordan… I suck, okay?" she starts. "I'm sorry I was such a crappy friend to you after you left. I should've tried harder. I should've gotten over myself and just made the effort to try and stay in touch."
Jordan just waits for a moment, before responding with a quirky, "That was really sudden…"
Linka sits back up, and looks into her eyes again. Jordan looks back, seeing the timidness in the white haired girls' demeanor.
"Jordan, please. For once, no jokes, no crud. I know you hate talking about feelings-"
"I never said I hate talking about feelings," Jordan softly says to interrupt, leaning her elbow against the couch and resting her face in her hand.
Linka sighs. "You seem like it."
For a moment, she says nothing so she collect her thoughts. She knew what she needed to say, but she wasn't sure how. Maybe she was overthinking it, though. Maybe she just needed… to say.
"I was scared. I don't know why. But I was scared to talk to you, so I didn't. It was different when I could just see you at school or ride my bike to your house. I knew you'd be there… But after you left, it was different. It was like, I felt forced. I felt like what we had wasn't the same, and it never could be again. It made me feel bad, so… I just stopped trying. For my own sake…"
She gets it all out, and she leans back against the couch to avoid Jordan's amber eyes. She can feel her eyes slightly tearing up, and her ears burning up. Years of frustration built up had all just been spilled out the floodgates, in a matter of mere seconds.
And the worst part? Now she just felt stupid for trying at all.
Finally, Jordan says something back.
"I… I get it," she begins. Linka looks back to hear after hearing these words, and now Jordan looks away as she folds her arms and deflatedly faces forward.
"I was scared too. Of everything. My new school, my new house… Thinking of how I needed to stay in touch with my old life. After a while though, I guess it just made me feel worse than anything. I felt like I was hanging onto something just- better left to fray. I don't know if I'm saying it right."
She stops for a moment to catch her breath, and she sneaks a little look at Linka before allowing herself to sink deeper into the couch before continuing.
"I feel like, people expect so much from me. And I guess that's why I don't do this, mushy Full House stuff. I know when I let someone in, that they'll feel like they have to see more from me. I don't think I'm capable of giving it back…"
She pauses again, then fixes her eyes on Linka. She sits up again, and looks deep into her eyes with her same posture as before.
"You were different though. You were like… my favorite person for the longest time. I mean, I know Claudia was your best friend… but I always felt like I was a strong number 2…"
Linka smirks the faintest smirk. She hated herself, but she had to say it: "You are a number two."
"Shut up," Jordan simply responds with a small smile coming to her face. She then leans her head back for a moment before saying more. "I guess I was more afraid of getting closer than I was growing apart."
For a moment, there's another silence. It gives Linka time to breathe, time to relax her fluttering heart and wipe the sweat from her clammy palms.
Was this what breakthroughs felt like? It was kind of suckish. Weird.
But it felt really good, too.
"I think- I think I feel the same way. I think so, anyway," Linka says before looking back to Jordan. Their eyes meet, and… they refuse to look away. Now that they've reached this new science of understanding, this new foundation of trust… they didn't have to.
"You weren't some consolation prize to Claudia though. You were my best friend too. I cared a lot about you, Jordan. I still do.
They focus on each other's eyes, conveying the same angst and pain, the same fear and anxiety, the same comfort and understanding. It was really weird, but it was a good weird. It felt like they could try this forever, maybe, knowing full well they couldn't, knowing it would have to end one day; but also wanting to try regardless.
But then, it becomes too much for Linka, comparable to everything she said before. Every rose had its thorns, and she'd just pricked herself with one. She had to turn away.
"Even if I do a crummy job of showing it," she adds to her prior statement, sinking deep into the couch like the pathetic piece of waste she is.
Jordan waits, then scoots just an inch closer to Linka. "Hey, come on. You've already got ten brothers to guilt trip you about stuff. Go easy," she jokes. She looks out the corner of her eye, then allows herself to look to Linka once again, this time with sincerity.
"And, I'm here. I'm here for you, Linka."
Linka looks back to her, and again, she loses herself just gazing at her. She doesn't remember ever seeing this side of Jordan; one where she's openly remorseful, conspicuously considerate, here for her.
If she didn't stop looking at her the way she is now…
But, in what should have been forsooth, Jordan shuts her eyes, tilts her head back, and starts flippin' singing.
"Is it oooooooverrrr… Is it over? Cause it's drivin' me insane!"
Linka has to laugh. "You're so stupid," she tells her in the most affectionate way imaginable.
Jordan just keeps singing though, freeing her inner Disney princess. Or maybe Deadpool. Something in between.
"Take a walk outside your mi-i-i-i-i-ind... And tell me how it feels to be, the one who turns the knife inside of me!Come on Linka I know you know the words!" she teases, standing up from the couch and taking the other girl by the hands.
Linka says nothing. She can't. She just smiles like an idiot as she lets Jordan lift her into this dancing embrace, letting these strange, weird gushy feelings permeate the air like pollen.
She lets Jordan take the lead, still singing (and butchering) her best Steven Tyler. With her hands in Jordan's, she feels at peace, she feels like nothing else matters. She has her best friend back, and she doesn't have to worry about anything else, at least not tonight.
So she decides to sing along, and dance along, and laugh along too.
And it feels good. Great. Better than maybe anything she's felt since arriving in Great Lakes City.
Eventually though, the sound of a doorbell buzzing cuts through their commotion, and they stop. One thing they both certainly agreed upon: food comes first.
So they freeze, still holding hands, and look into one another's eyes as the annoying sound of the doorbell buzzing repeats.
It may as well be muted though. Jordan was looking at Linka that same way again, and she was already feeling giddy and mirthful enough to make a fool of herself. But this exchange, this brought and even stronger feeling of excitement to her heart, one she isn't sure just what will make her do.
But then, Jordan frees one hand to preen her hair, all while looking at Linka and laughing the smallest, sweetest laugh, and then she frees the other.
"Alright loser. Go see if my laptop is charged and maybe we'll watch something while we stuff our fat faces," Jordan tells Linka before going for the door, looking back at Linka here and there with the same endearing smile glued on her face.
Linka smiles back, standing beside herself with this wonderfully saccharine feeling lingering in her chest. Savoring it. Clinging to it. Hoping it would never leave.
"Sure thing."
So, I guess I should've said that this chapter would have… LEMONS :D
(If you already don't hate me, you really should now.)
The song referenced was "Hole in My Soul" by Aerosmith. YEEEEEAAAAAH!
Anyway, I had intended for this thing to be four chapters long, but I'm guessing there will be one or two more. It depends on how I feel about maybe stretching past what I anticipated to be the ending. But, I digress.
I hope you're having fun reading, and I hope you'll stay tuned for more. Thank you very much, and see ya next time, true believers.