Saber and I clashed blades. It didn't matter how far I've come in these past two weeks, she was still at a level could not match. She, alongside every servant I had faced, were untouchable monsters in combat, the very epitome of what it meant to be a legend. These were the kinds of foes I had to be able to face if I wanted to be a hero.

And I had no idea how to do so. I was lost and as such, did the only thing that I could think of. I asked Saber. She seemed to always be self-assured and was even a human who walked the path into legend.

And at our lunch break, an opportunity presented itself.

"Saber?"

"Yes, Shirou?"

"How do I become strong enough to match a Servant?"

The small smile Saber wore when enjoying food dried up into a disapproving frown.

"Shirou, how many times must I tell you. You cannot face a servant in your current state. Leave the fighting to me."

"Ah, Saber that's not what I'm asking. I've certainly learned my lesson after being crushed again and again. I guess the whereupon I really want to ask is: How do I become strong enough to be a hero?"

Saber's eyes narrowed and I was taken aback by the sheer anger she displayed.

"Strength is not what makes a hero Shirou."

"Of course I know that! But if I'm not strong enough to defeat opponents the how can I expect to save anyone?"

Saber closed her eyes and let out a deep sigh before heading towards the exit.

"Ah Saber? Where are you going?"

"...outside. It's a rare sight to have a clear day in winter and we should not waste it indoors."

Without another word, she walked outside and I rushed after her.

She was obviously angry with me but for the life of me, I couldn't understand why. All I did was ask a question…

I found her on the patio, sitting and staring up at the sky, acknowledging my presence by gesturing for me to sit next to her. We safe in silence for a short while, simply gazing at the vast blue sky before Saber spoke once more.

"Do not use strength as the deciding factor of what makes a hero."

"What's the point if I'm not strong enough to save anyone?"

Saber's eyes turned to me and once more, I was shocked at the sheer steel in her eyes.

"Shirou, if that was the case then Gilgamesh is the person you should strive to be. If that was the case then a peasant could never do a single thing heroic. Is this the world you see Shirou?"

"What!? No that's not what I meant. What I'm asking is-"

Saber's sigh cut me off as she stared at me for a moment longer before looming shock up into the sky.

"My apologies Shirou. I did understand what you meant, however, the subject of strength is a sore spot for me."

I was taken aback a bit. Saber usually never spoke up about her past and to openly display passion like this was something of a curiosity. Which begged the question, why? Why would she hate the idea of strength?

"Ah… Saber, why do you hate the idea of strength so much?"

Saber gazed into the sky for a moment longer, perhaps remembering something in the distant past before speaking once more.

"I despise the idea of strength is what decides a hero Shirou. While it may be true that an ant cannot protect an elephant, you have to then ask yourself, who are you stronger than?"

I was confused now. Was it not a requirement of a hero to be stronger than their opponents? For how could you save anyone if you were defeated?

"What do you mean Saber? Isn't the only thing you have to be stronger than is your opposition?

"That kind of strength is just tyranny Shirou. Someone called a hero simply for their ability to slay others is the very antithesis of the title. If you judge yourself by those standards, you will never save anyone, all you will ever do is massacre those weaker than you."

Her words froze me in my tracks. I wanted to deny it, to say that what I was doing was to protect others yet at its core, that was where the path I spoke of would lead me. Which begged the question…

"What can I do then Saber? If being stronger than my enemies is a path that will only lead to bloodshed, then what can I do?

A small smile formed on Saber's face at my question and its moments like these that reminded me that although she looked my age, she was a ruler wisened by experience.

"Compare your strength to only your former self Shirou. Become stronger not to lord that fact over others, but for the simple reason that you can be better than your former self."

"And if I'm not strong enough even then?"

"You don't seem like the type that would let yourself stagnate Shirou. Think of how much you've improved in just these past weeks alone and imagine how far you could go after months, years or even decades. But if you truly are worried Shirou, there's one more fact about you that sets you apart from those heroes who failed in their goals."

Saber's expression grew solemn once more and she turned all of her attention back to that distant blue sky.

"You're willing to ask for help and as long as you keep this current mindset, I don't think you have to worry too much about what the future will bring."

With her piece said, Saber fell silent, seeming content to just watch the clouds roll by on this rare clear day in winter. There was so much more I wanted to ask her. About her past, what she felt, and a million other questions yet our time running out. I had resigned myself to this fact so why was I feeling this doubt now?

So with a sigh, I sat down beside Saber and watched the clouds roll by. That was how we spent one of our last moments, one of us reminiscing about the past and the other dreaming about the future.

=/=

Truly, those were dreamlike days.

They might have been short moments in an era that had long since passed but I still vividly remember the two weeks we had spent together.

I had come a long way since then and even though I claimed to have no regrets, it's in the quiet moments like these where I cannot help but gaze into the sky and wonder.

"Would you be proud of me when we meet again?"