Can I just say... I am having too much fun writing this! Total break from stupid school, blah. You know I'm the Ferbella girl... but, I love writing Phineas and Adyson and Buford and Baljeet and Vanessa and everyone! Whoo!

I was on a mission and this mission would be successful. Phineas was going to get a girlfriend. Yeah, if I told past Isabella that this was my mission she'd probably freak, but who cares about that? Phineas was clearly suffering from extreme loneliness. Phineas had a very small list of relationships, all of which had probably lasted as long as ours had… which meant… nothing. No romance or intimacy or crossing any kind of steps. No way had Phineas ever said, "I love you" to anyone. And now, we were getting to the age where it looked like the group was starting to pair up and get into actual serious relationships… meanwhile, Phineas was still being Phineas. I just needed to find the girl for him. I have to assume that Phineas' soulmate is some mystery girl somewhere that maybe he would've found himself if he actually dated. We found Wynne last year when looking for a girlfriend for Ferb, and we ended up finding Kyle's soulmate. Everything works out in the end.

"Alright guys, today we crack the theory of everything." Phineas declared.

Baljeet sighed. "Phineas, I've already told you, it's almost impossible for us to…"

"Nothing's impossible! Look, ok, the GUT model I have is almost perfect…"

"It's impossible!"

"YOU'RE SUCH NERDS!" Buford lost his mind and left.

"What are you talking about?" I questioned. They are nerds.

"Remember how I told you about string theory?" Ferb said. "Well, the theory of everything is somewhat of an alternate theory… it's the ultimate theory of the universe… that currently doesn't technically exist."

"And there's no way Phineas Flynn here is going to come up with it, much less prove it!" Baljeet declared angrily, as he stormed out, just like Buford.

"Jeez."

I laughed. "Buford's right. You are nerds."

"But I'm close. I almost have my grand unification theory down, and then it's only one more step." Phineas said.

"You say it like you can do it in a day…" Then I realized who I was talking to. "Ok, what, then, is a grand unification theory?"

"Ok, so… there's three interactions in particle physics, like let's say Ferb's strong interactions, you're weak interactions,"

"Hey!"

He ignored me. "And I'm electromagnetic interactions. If I have the proper GUT model, you know, grand unification, they'll merge into one force! Like us! Then all I need is my way to get gravity in there somehow, and I'll have the theory of everything!"

I smiled to myself. "All you need is your gravity…" Ferb noticed me smiling away to myself and gave me a warning look, but I shrugged it off. "Sooo… Phineas, um, is there anything else you think you NEED? Tools, plans, a girlfriend, workspace…"

"Wait, what was that third one?"

"Um," I twiddled my fingers together. "A girlfriend?"

"Huh?" Phineas turned his head towards me. "A… girlfriend? You think I need a girlfriend?"

"Didn't you think Ferb needed a girlfriend last year when he was upset? Well, he got one! Me! And it all worked out!" I said happily.

"I told you guys, I've been telling everyone, I'm fine." Phineas said. "What… do you think I'm the third wheel or something?" He asked, hurt.

"NO! No…" But I could tell he didn't believe me. "I… I just…"

Suddenly, Phineas' eyebrows furrowed. "Did you three put her up to this?" He said angrily, turning to Ferb.

"What?" I exclaimed.

"What did Buford tell you?" He exclaimed.

"Why are you getting so angry?" I asked, stunned.

"Let me get this straight…" Phineas said, frustrated. "You think I need a girlfriend… and the guys, they all think… they all think… ok, it doesn't matter what they think! I'm not upset! I'm not lonely! I'm not acting any different than I have before!"

"Yeah, that's the problem." I said, under my breath.

Phineas opened his mouth like he was about to say something, then closed it. Then he opened it, and closed it again. "You're all… just… just… mean." He finished lamely, and he stormed out too.

"Well, looks like three pissed off friends in less than ten minutes. Impressive." Ferb remarked.

"Why did he get so mad at me?" I cried. "He'll never let me set him up now! What did you guys say to him?"

"I didn't say anything." Ferb stated. I glared at him. "Well, we may have implied that every single one of his friends really thinks that he needs to just… get laid."

"What? Who said that? It was Buford, wasn't it? We don't all think that!" Ferb arched an eyebrow at me. "What? I don't. Relationships aren't all about sex. When I was in love with Phineas, when I was with Phineas, I didn't even think about it."

"Was that because you didn't want to or because you knew Phineas wasn't going to?" Ferb asked dryly.

"I… I don't know." I said. "It was probably because of you." I said weakly. "I was so, so in love with you by then."

"My Bella." He kissed me gently.

"But now that you say that, I don't know! I don't know! Because now that I'm in a non-Phineas relationship, I… I would go nuts without doing it. But with Phineas?" Now I just had to contemplate this. The rest of us were all just… horndogs. If we weren't doing our partners, we were going out on dates or talking about guys or girls or relationships or having one-night-stands or being friends-with-benefits! Phineas didn't do any of that. He was a baby compared to his friends. He needed that girlfriend. He…

"Ferb… yeah, he needs to get laid."

That stupid particle physics day, that additional realization, had made the girlfriend mission all the more important. Although, as more days went by, I still hadn't found anyone. Ferb seemed less inclined to help me with this and more inclined to want to do… other things. Allegedly, the honeymoon phase, the good part, in a relationship is supposed to like, end. After a few months, heck, after a few weeks, much less a year, you aren't supposed to still be flirting and spending all of your time with each other. You're not supposed to be thinking about your partner every minute of every day. You're not supposed to jump on each other the second they step into a room. Well, I guess we're permanently honeymooning.

"Mmm, baby, remember what we're doing now?" I giggled. I slid my hands up his bare chest.

"Of course. Ladies first." He growled.

He pushed me down onto my bed and slid off my panties. Ferb gently covered my inner thigh with kisses. Oh god. I was so turned on right now. His tongue flicked, and it caused me to arch my back a little and twist my body. "Ferb!" Then, there was the irritating noise of the phone ringing. He did it again and I moaned. Of course, the goddamn phone was kind of killing me. "Don't stop!" I commanded him. I grabbed the phone. "WHAT?" I yelled at the poor unfortunate soul on the other end.

"Uh, hey, Isabella." Gretchen said timidly.

"Gretch…" I panted. Probably not the best idea to answer while I was being flicked, and licked, and suckled, and swirled, "…Ooooh." I moaned.

"Are you ok?" She asked.

"Yeah," I said weakly. "Yeah, yeah, yeah… sorry for yelling at you… oh GOD."

"Isabella, just called to remind that we're all, the girls, coming over to my place tonight."

I felt the shockwaves of pleasure hit me, and I think I might have left Earth. I was just a trembling sweaty mess. "M-kay." I could barely get it out.

Ferb crawled up next to me. "Your turn." He whispered.

"And next time… could you two just… finish first… and call me back?"

"What?" I exclaimed.

"Say hi to Ferb for me." She giggled and hung up.

"Eeep!" I squealed, putting the phone down. "That wasn't horrifically embarrassing, at all!"

"So, who was it?" He asked playfully, although he already knew.

"It was Gretchen." I said. "You know, it's my fault. I'm the dumbass who thought I could get away with being tongue-fucked on the phone. I bet you could pull it off."

He nodded. "Yup. Let's call her back and try."

I hit him, laughing. "You idiot! Anyway, I have to get dressed and go to hang out with the Fireside Girls soon."

"Alright." He sat up. "Should I leave?"

"Wait!" I grabbed his arm. "Remember? Mmm… it's my turn now."

"Gretch… you're not going to tell the girls…" I brushed some of my hair awkwardly out of my face as I helped her set up the drinks and snacks for everyone. It wasn't like I would be mortified. The thing is, even though Ferb and I weren't huge PDA people, everyone, and I mean, EVERYONE, knew exactly how bad we had it for each other, so stuff like this was never surprising. But, still, I didn't need any more Adyson torture in my life.

"What? That your boyfriend was eating you out?"

"Gretchen!" We both started laughing.

"Isabella," She rolled her eyes. "Why would I tell them that?"

"I don't know." I said. "Because none of us seem to be able to keep a goddamn secret in this group."

"Well, I consider it highly unlikely that anyone will care about this information… especially since we all know he's done it a million times by now."

"Shut up!" I said laughing.

She giggled. "Ok, I'm not going to tease you. I just want to say, I have no plans on spilling any secrets you want to keep."

"Thanks Gretch. We all love you." I said.

Gretchen was the bomb. She was way more logical than Ginger and just way nicer than Adyson. She was always my perfect brainy assistant best friend, with the shiny auburn hair and sparkly sapphire eyes. I loved always having her by my side. She was just the kind of person you wanted by your side. The kind of person every girl wants as a best friend and every guy wants as a girlfriend. Ha… wait a minute…

"Gretch…" I stared at her for a while. "When's the last time you've been out on a date?"

"Well… why do you ask?" She asked suspiciously.

"No reason." I said.

It had been forever and a day since I remember Gretchen going out with anyone. And I had seen her been asked out a few times too! She just tended to turn people down. I don't know what she was looking for. Gretchen was so pretty and sweet and… grounded.

I was going set up Gretchen and Phineas. It was perfect! It couldn't be more perfect. There wasn't a single girl more together than Gretchen, and Phineas so desperately needed a girlfriend. They were total opposites and that's what they needed. I don't care if they both said they didn't want to be with anyone, I was doing it! And Ferb was helping me!

"Hey hey hey!" Holly called, as she and the girls came strolling in.

"Isabella, you look pretty." Milly complimented me.

"Oh, thanks." I glanced down. "Ha, Ferb told me to wear this dress."

"Aww." Milly said.

"Mr. and Mrs. Perfect strike again." Adyson said.

"Ooo, that means he was with you this morning." Katie crooned.

"Of course he was." Adyson rolled her eyes. "If Isabella and Ferb did not screw each other every day, the world would like, stop rotating, I am not even kidding!"

"Just… go back to texting Buford!" I declared. She violently blushed. HA! Got her!

"Ooo, Addy and Buford!" The girls all crooned.

"Fuck all of you!" She exclaimed.

I giggled. Adyson and Buford weren't like the rest of us, at all. Baljeet and Ginger… girl with desperate crush on guy since they were kids who inevitably got together. Me and Phineas… girl with desperate crush on guy since they were kids who inevitably got together. Candace and Jeremy… girl with desperate crush on guy since they were kids who inevitably got together. Ferb and Vanessa… guy with desperate crush on girl since they were kids who inevitably got together. Seeing a pattern here? But Adyson and Buford… Adyson and Buford had never had "crushes" on each other. Adyson had more boyfriends and crushes than I could remember (and, excluding Ferb, they were all losers). Buford's "type" was female, period. They practically gagged at the idea of dating each other, even though they flirted all the time. But, if you asked any member of the gang the question, which two of us will undeniably end up a couple in the future… by now, I think all of us would say Buford and Adyson.

"Um, are you ok, Ginger?" Gretchen asked. I just noticed, she hadn't said one word since she walked in.

"Me? Me? I'm fine." She said.

"Yeah… what exactly happened between you and Baljeet the other night?" I asked. "Did it end as ugly as we thought it might?"

"No!" She said, frustrated. "It ended fine. I'm not mad at him or anything. It's just… guys… fucking MISHTI is coming back? Why?"

"Oh, Ginger…" I sighed. "You've been stuck on this for years. Come on! You and Baljeet are the perfect couple, not me and Ferb."

"Yeah." Gretchen said. "Baljeet is your boyfriend. You should trust him."

"I trust him. It's just… have you seen the pictures of her online?"

"Ginger…" I gave her a look. "My boyfriend's ex-girlfriend, his first love, is Vanessa. Vanessa."

"But…"

"Vanessa! And it drives me crazy ok, because she is goddamn beautiful, and talented, and rich, and he is still close to her in a lot of ways. But, Ginger, when Ferb walks in a room, it doesn't matter how many Vanessas are in there, he can only see one girl; me. And we can all tell… Baljeet only has eyes for Ginger." I finished.

"Aw, Izzy!" She hugged me.

I had given a beautiful speech, but in the pit of my stomach I still remembered what Phineas had said. In this scenario, Ginger wasn't Isabella, she was Vanessa. Maybe Baljeet all this time had secretly only had eyes for Mishti the way Ferb had for me.

"Hey, Isabella…" Adyson nudged me towards the kitchen. We both snuck away from the group into it. "Could I ask you something?"

"What, Addy?" I asked.

"Hmm," She said. "Maybe I shouldn't say anything."

"What?" I could tell I sounded too eager now. She had peaked my interest.

"Well," She looked at her fingernails casually. "I was going to ask you… Do you think Phineas would go for me?"

My mouth literally dropped open. "What!" I exclaimed. "You can't like Phineas!"

She gave me a look. "I thought you were over him? Because, you know, you're fucking his brother."

"No, it's just…" I stammered. "YOU can't like Phineas!"

Adyson likes Phineas? What? He's so not her type. Adyson has always gone for guys on the "bad boy" spectrum. Every single one of the guys she's ever liked has been "bad". They've all been the kind to wear all black or play in a punk band or ride motorcycles or have nasty piercings and tattoos. I mean, I literally just described Toby. Even Buford, who she's been flirting with since forever, ditched class, swears, and is the definition of a bully. Heck, even Ferb, who she had a crush on last year, is pretty sarcastic and cynical sometimes. But PHINEAS? The boy who always has a smile on his face and can see the bright side in anything, the definition of nerd and goody-two-shoes?

I mean, if she likes him… NO! I cannot set up Phineas with Adyson Sweetwater! Uggh! The thought made me shudder. Phineas was such an innocent boy and she was so… insane! She would probably turn him into her lapdog and make him do all sorts of stuff for her, build all sorts of stuff for her. And, after being Phineas' girlfriend, it's safe to say that, he is not a sexy guy. He's really cute, but I don't know, I'm pretty sure Adyson is into some crazy sex games. Oh my god, it would be so bad! No, no, he's better off with Gretchen.

"When did this start?" I exclaimed.

"I dunno…" She said. "He's just such a cutie!"

"I know, but… Adyson, he's Phineas!"

She gave me another look. "Isabella, you can't keep hogging Phineas and Ferb, ok, you only get one."

"That's not what I meant!" I said, exasperated. "He's… Phineas. He's not your type of guy. I mean… do you really think Phineas is going to… pin you down and tie you up when you want him to?" I whispered. I shuddered. "I'm sorry, I have to go throw up now, because of that sentence."

"I'll just have to change him then." Adyson said.

"What?" I exclaimed. "That's not going to happen."

"Is that a… challenge?"

"NO!"

"Challenge accepted!" She stated, as she left the kitchen.

"NO! Adyson, no! I said no! FUCK."

LOLZ. So there's the physics metaphor guys... the theory is actually Phineas, Ferb, and Isabella. And gravity is ... ? I'm guessing you know what the guys' subplots are now. Buford has a "thing" with Adyson, Baljeet's stuck between Ginger and Mishti, and Phineas is the Bachelor. Who will get a rose, lol? If it were up to him, probably no one. Ha ha... again... if you've read Catch 21... BUT... if you know my Adyson... BUT BUT BUT... if you know ME... LOLZ. As for Ferbella, ah, we'll get there. Right now... they're still honeymooning.

But, honestly, I have no idea where this might go. Suggestions? I'm serious... if you've ever wanted me to write something (NOT PHINABELLA! Ok... um, I'm not gonna lie... there could be some Phinabella in this story. AAAAAHHHHHH! KILL ME!), go ahead, this could go ANYWHERE at this point. Review please!