Once again, people think I'm funny. Weird.

String Theory is, in fact, a version of the Theory of Everything. However, it is flawed. We all know certain aspects are prone to… instability. But… have you ever heard of Superstring Theory? It implies all the particles have supersymmetrical partners… another out there… just like them. And maybe… that theory can be proven true.

"Hey baby." Isabella walked into our apartment, wearing a classic "little black dress". "Date night!" She said happily. I nodded.

"Yeah." Phineas said, swiveling around on a kitchen stool. "Date night."

"What's up with you?" She gave him a look.

"Nothing." He looked like he was going to fall off of it though. "So…" Phineas gulped a few times. "When are you guys going to be back tonight?" I glanced at him. He looked nervous. "Are you going both coming back or just Ferb or are you going to Isabella's…?"

My eyebrows rose. I had a feeling I knew what he was hoping on doing… or should I say, who.

"Why do you care?" Isabella asked quizzically.

"No reason!" He said awkwardly. I gave him a look. "Well… actually, me and some of the gang were just gonna hang out." His hand was scratching at his ear. Liar.

"You were?" She asked. "Why do you care about us then? I mean, if everyone is hanging out, we can be back early if you want."

"NO." He declared anxiously.

"What is the big deal?" Isabella asked obliviously. "Is it just the guys? What? I always hang out with you boys." I gave him another look, a look that said, "Stop lying to our faces".

"Um, no." He muttered. "It's, um, just… Mishti."

Isabella's mouth opened. "Phineas!" She exclaimed.

"Would you stop saying that every single time!?" He said grumpily. "Yes, yes, I'm hanging out with Mishti! Is that so wrong?"

I couldn't help but start laughing to myself. "What are you laughing about?" Isabella smiled at me.

"You do know what our Phinny's gotten himself into." I said. "They're friends-with-benefits."

"What?" He squinted at me. "No… no…"

"So, Mishti is a girl who is in the same social circle as you, and you two are obviously friends with one another… yet, you two have slept with each other multiple times and seem to have no plans to stop sleeping with each other… and these actions have had little to no impact on your friendship, positive or negative… umm, what does that sound like to you, Isabella?"

"Friends-with-benefits!" She crowed. "You're right!"

I was right. It started happening all the time. Like, ALL the time. A lot of the time, he would just run out, night or day, randomly calling, "Going to Mishti's." Then, the rest of the time… she was here. I guess I was finally feeling what Phineas had been feeling. Thank goodness nobody screamed or moaned quite like Isabella, so I couldn't hear anything from my bedroom, but if at any point they caught me by surprise, I would walk by and hear noises that sounded essentially like two horny kittens. Uggh… I guess I finally got the "normal" roommate I wanted.

"Hey Ferb," I noticed he was surveying the room. "Could you maybe… go to Isabella's tonight?"

I rolled my eyes. "I'm being sexiled? We're not in college, you do have your own bedroom."

"Yeah, ha, we might not stay in there tonight." He literally slapped his hand over his mouth after saying that.

My mouth dropped open. Oh my GOD. So not only did he want to sleep with Mishti, he wanted to do… other things… as well. "What is going on with you?"

He wrung his hands together. "I… please don't tell Isabella this. Mishti and I are JUST FRIENDS. But even if we wanted to be more we… we can't be like you and Isabella, this can't end up like you and Isabella, we can't be 'a thing', we can't be 'together', this can't go anywhere, I mean, we live on different sides of the planet. But, she and I just… we like to… we still kind of want to… so um, we decided to make the most of the time we have now, you know, make the most of every day."

I covered my eyes. Fuuu-

"So… uh… we made a list!" He said brightly. "You know, of everything we've ever wanted to do, ever! You know, um… with each other."

I shook my head. "You're sick. You're a sick individual."

Just then, there was knocking at the door. "I got it!" Phineas said eagerly.

"Hi." Mishti strutted in, wearing those strappy sandals and flipping her hair. Wow, she really is gorgeous. Why is it that Phineas gets all the gorgeous girls; the Isabellas and Mishtis, without even trying? "Hmm… so…" She said suggestively, leaning back against the couch.

"Ha, yeah…" Phineas ran his hand through his hair nervously. "FERB."

Mishti turned to me. "How are you, Mr. Fletcher?"

"I'm fine." I said, narrowing my eyes at Phineas.

"Yeah, actually, he was just leaving." He narrowed his eyes back at me. "GET OUT." He hissed.

"You're sick." I mouthed again, as I walked out. I wrapped my knuckles on Isabella's door.

"Hey baby," She opened it. "What's up?"

"He's sick!" I declared.

"What?" She asked.

I decided not to tell Isabella about Phineas' "seize the day" ideas with Mishti, since he had asked me not to. "Someone is playing with someone else tonight."

"Wow." She said. "Be honest… Is something, wrong, with me?"

"What?" I asked, confused.

"Not even just me. Like, we all thought Phineas had no sex drive. But, maybe it was just the girls." She sighed. "Maybe it isn't me, or Adyson, or Gretchen, or any other pretty girl who has liked Phineas. It's… Mishti. I mean, is she even human? She can't be human." We both laughed a little.

"Oh, and she likes to walk around in his T-shirts with that crazy sex hair, and he gets mad if I see her." I grumbled.

"Uh-huh. It's not like you and the guys STARE at Mishti's hot bod or anything, Mr. 'Vanessa was pretty'." Isabella commented.

I shook my head. "You're never going to let that go, are you?"

"Nope!" She giggled.

"I guess I know how he felt before." I grumbled. "Urgh, it's never-ending."

"My poor baby." Isabella smiled. "Well… Phineas and Mishti don't get to have all the fun, huh?" She swiftly pulled her T-shirt over her head.

"Oh, what would I do without you, Isabella?" I replied.

"Mmmm…" She was tying up her hair as she strolled towards me. Somehow she looked so delicate and fragile, yet so intense and dangerous at the same time. No one was as attractive as Isabella. Despite Mishti's fancy negligee and lingerie sets, I would pick Isabella's cotton bras every time. "More whining, I guess."

"Shut up." I dragged my mouth down her neck, and pushed down a bra strap. She was kissing me almost instantly. Our tongues slid together frantically. "Sofa." She mumbled.

"Can't… make it to the bedroom?" I asked. I realized she was pushing me. We fell back onto the couch.

"No." She straddled me. "No! Gah. Too many clothes."

Yeah. We had enough layers that I could barely feel anything. She struggled to take off her leggings while I took off my jeans and shirt. She undid the bra and threw it to the ground. I grasped at her ponytail and pulled it back a little.

"Ohhh."

I sucked at her neck again, but then moved to her breasts. "I want you." I murmured.

"SHIT." She cried. "Ferb!" I slid everything down and pushed into her, taking her hard, her loud cries and moans filling the room, with her legs wrapped around me and her hands gripping at my hair. I felt the rush and Isabella screamed very loudly.

"Aren't… aren't you grateful that you have a girlfriend?" She gasped.

"I'm grateful for two things." I panted. "That my girlfriend is just… so good in bed."

"Mmm." She purred.

"And that Mishti Patel does not scream like her."

She hit me.

I guess Isabella and I finally understood what it was like for everybody last year, finding out about the whole "friends-with-benefits" thing, because once everybody learned about Mishti and Phineas, it was all anyone could talk about. The problem was no one wanted to be mean to Mishti, since she was so sweet and we just didn't know her well enough to insult her. And we definitely didn't want to talk about this with Baljeet. He would probably kill all of us. Phineas had clearly tried his best in the beginning to stay away from Mishti as he was told, but, he was just drawn to her like a magnet and he couldn't stop now. Plus, Isabella insisted we stay mum around Phineas since it had been embarrassing for her when they talked about us in front of us. So, somehow, the group had to get together excluding these three and without them knowing about it. Which was hard when Phineas lived in the same house. It would have been impossible except for the fact that… he was always in Mishti's hotel room now.

"Milly, girl, you are magic!" Holly laughed. "That's twice this has happened!"

"I didn't think she would do it!" Milly exclaimed, laughing too. "I mean, it was Phineas, I was joking!"

"It's so… unnatural." Adyson said.

"No, him never doing anyone was unnatural." Buford said. "Uggh, and she's soooo hot! How did she end up with Dinnerbell, of all people?"

"Well, Buford, it's quite clear at this point they are attracted to each other." I remarked.

"Yeah, otherwise they never would've hooked up at the wedding, no matter how drunk they were, much less over and over and over again." Katie said.

"Yeah, everyone in the world is attracted to Mishti. But… why Dinnerbell?"

"Well, how many other single guys are running around here?" Wynne remarked.

"ME." Buford stated.

"That's a good one." Adyson laughed. We all secretly exchanged glances. "Anyway, it was a one-night stand, remember? We asked her about it, she didn't even seem to give a crap about him."

"And Baljeet told him to stay the fuck away from her." Buford remarked.

"So how did this happen?" Gretchen asked.

"He couldn't do it!" Isabella said. "He tried really hard to stay away from her, but he broke."

"Face it, they have it really bad for each other. Like, worse than Ferb and Isabella!" Milly giggled.

"Oh, the king and queen have been toppled." Kyle declared.

"Yeah, Mr. and Mrs. Perfect have been beaten by the Odd Couple." Adyson said.

Isabella sighed. "I know none of you will believe me, and it seems weird, but Phineas and Mishti are a really good match for each other."

"Why? Because they're both completely oblivious to everything?" Ginger snapped. Ginger couldn't believe that somehow Mishti had ruined her relationship with Baljeet and still not realize she had done anything. Which she hadn't really. It was Baljeet's jealousy and Ginger's jealousy that had led to their breakup. Of course, none of us actually knew whether Baljeet really loved Mishti or not. Ginger also considered Phineas the catalyst in this all. I don't see how Phineas and Mishti being together had anything to do with Baljeet and Ginger really, but it did.

"No, she's just, she's his other half, guys!" Isabella said. "She might be sexiest girl we know and he's most innocent… but, guys, if you see them, they have a lot in common."

"Come on, Isabella!" Buford exclaimed.

"Well, what do we like about Phineas, girls? What's attractive about Phineas?" Isabella asked.

"He's cute." Adyson said.

"He's super smart. And fun. And exciting." Katie said.

"And innocent and sweet." Gretchen said.

"Who does that sound like?" Isabella asked.

"…Kind of like Mishti," Wynne said.

"Right!" Isabella said. "They're, they're both so… completely clueless. They're both so smart and sweet and great at everything! She's the one girl in the world who can match Phineas. And they have so much fun together."

"Yup. We know exactly what kind of fun they have." Kyle said. Everyone started laughing again.

We get teased when we're single. We get teased when we're together. We teased about whom we like. We get teased that we don't have "enough" sex. We get teased when we have "too much" sex. We're all horrible people.

"Bye guys!" Isabella called, as the last of the group trailed out, late at night. "Are you going home?" She asked me.

"I don't know." I responded. "I'm not sure if Phinegan's Wake is going on in there or not."

Isabella started giggling. "You can stay with me, baby."

"I always stay with you." I said.

"I know." She said. "Just about all the time now. You're lucky."

"Yeah, I am." I wrapped my arms around her.

"Ha, I mean, Phineas didn't have a girlfriend's house to hide in." She giggled. "We covered this. If you two lived alone, this wouldn't be a problem."

"Or," I gently brushed some hair out of her face. "If I lived with you."

"If… ha…" She glanced up and smiled. "If, we like, moved in together?" I smiled and shrugged. "I… I…"

"Let's go to sleep, love."

THEY WERE DRIVING ME CRAZY. How could Phineas have lived with Isabella and I for a whole year? I had to go apologize to him. Or, I would, if he didn't have his own fluffy pink vixen in his bed all the time now. How did he find… another Isabella? Every day it was… something.

I stormed into Phineas' room. "Bro," He looked up from his laptop. "What's wrong?"

I held it up for him. When you dangled it like that, it looked even lacier, and see-through. I tapped my foot.

"Oh my god!" He sat up quickly. "Where… where did you get that?"

"It was in my room." I growled. "Any explanation?"

"No?" He said weakly.

I glared. "What if ISABELLA had found it?" I hissed.

"I'm sorry! It's all her fault! Blame her, not me!" He exclaimed. "It was a dare! She dared me to, Ferb!"

Gross. I had to steam clean my room now. "When?"

"Um… remember that other night when we were all watching that horror movie…" He said sheepishly, trailing off.

What the FUCK? They had snuck off to have sex, in MY room, while the gang and I were hanging out right in the living room?

He could clearly tell I was disturbed by this. "Oh, come on. You've never done that?" Well, I did kind of do that, at my birthday party, with way more people, last year. I could blame Isabella for that one. "And, you've never kind of wanted to do it somewhere you definitely weren't supposed to? Like, ha, someone else's room?" He barely laughed to himself. "We're just…" He ran his hand though his hair. "Going down the list." He said quietly.

"Phineas… uh… what else is on this list of yours?" I asked, somewhat curiously, somewhat critically. Ha, "Ferb's bedroom" seemed like the lowest on the list. Anything from dominatrix to on a rollercoaster to upside down and blindfolded; I don't know, the list was so absurd, but it was exactly like something he would do.

"Oh my god!" He blushed bright red. "Nothing! Remember, you promised, you can't tell Isabella! Or anyone else!" He exclaimed. "And… give me that!" He said, snatching the bra from me. "You TELL NO ONE. Stop, stop giving me that look, Ferb!" He said angrily. "What? It's ok for you to have Isabella over here and do… stuff, but not me?"

"It's weird!" I blurted out.

"I know!" He exclaimed. "It's weird. It's weird. I don't wanna be with her. She doesn't wanna be with me. I ended up in that bed by accident. And… Baljeet is my friend, and I haven't given up on him yet. It's weird! I don't even know what I'm doing. I REALLY don't know what I'm doing." He finished, sounding totally confused. "But, I don't… I don't want… I don't want to… stop."

He blinked a few times. Clearly, Phineas was like a fish out of water right now. But a fish that had decided he wanted to learn how to breathe air and walk and fly, all in the same day.

"Isabella, the two of them are driving me mad." I said to her. "I realize now we were very inconsiderate to Phineas."

"Is she over here that much?" She asked, raising her eyebrows. "More than me?" I nodded. "What does this mean?" She asked. "Can I set them up?"

"Isabella," I said. "I don't think so. She's caused so much trouble. It's a strange couple. And they live on opposite sides of the world."

"Oh, but how can that stop true love?" She said dreamily, lying back on the couch.

"True love?" Phineas and Mishti are true love? Ha. Ok. Are any of us true love? If we were, we wouldn't keep breaking up or getting into all these love triangles. I will always love Isabella, and I will never fall out of love with Isabella. But I was still haunted by the query of whether we would last. I simply turned on the TV to an already roaring football match.

"Oh, Ferb, tonight's soccer night? Oh come on! Can't we do something more romantic?" Isabella whined.

"Darling, I'll take you to the stars and back… after this match." I said.

"Aahh! All boys are the same! Why do I even pretend you're different, Ferb?" Isabella declared.

"I thought you liked soccer."

"Well, yeah, I like soccer as much as the next girl…"

We heard a squeal and we both almost jumped out of our skins. "Oh my gosh!" Mishti came running out of Phineas' room. She was wearing a silky little nightgown, which may or may not have been more revealing than simply wearing his shirt. "There's a match on? Cool!"

"Maybe you don't like it as much as the next girl." I whispered.

"Oh my god, they, they were in there… doing it?" Isabella whispered weakly.

"Welcome to my life."

"Phineas, come on!" She jumped right on the couch next to me.

Phineas was also in pjs. Besides really bad sex hair, he seemed just as eager and innocent as ever. "Coming. Hey," He headed to the kitchen. "You guys want anything? I'm grabbing some chips."

"Yeah, that sounds good." Mishti called.

He grabbed the bag and plopped down next to her. They both looked so much like eager kids; I couldn't believe they had just been in bed with each other.

"Yeah… ok, Ferb… I'll stay." Isabella was staring at them like they were freaks. She wanted to sit on my lap, like always, so we both snuggled together.

The match was great and intense; we were practically yelling at the screen at points.

"What!" I exclaimed. "That was straight-out violence! Red card!"

"Nope." Mishti said confidently. "It'll be yellow."

"Yup." Phineas agreed. "There's no way that'll be red."

"Ugh." Isabella rolled her eyes.

"Yellow card!"

"What?" I cried.

Phineas and Mishti low-fived. "Told ya."

"Ferb," Isabella whispered to me. "What is wrong with them?"

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"They're… they're acting like… friends."

I glanced at them. Mishti was giggling. "Ow, Phineas! I told you I was ticklish!"

"Sorry! You should quit hogging the chips." He stated.

"What are they supposed to be acting like?" I asked.

"I don't know… when we were doing this, all I could think about was you! Everything just ended up being romantic."

"Isabella… I'm pretty sure we executed the 'friends-with-benefits' idea completely wrong. And I'm pretty sure Phineas and Mishti are doing it completely right. He's spent his entire life either oblivious to or avoiding love, romance, and even attraction. And it sounds like… Mishti kind of has too. They just like the sex."

"Ferb! They're sleeping together! They can't just… hang out! They have to feel… something!" Isabella sighed. "Maybe… maybe their love is different than ours."

"Bella…" I groaned quietly.

"No, really! I mean, between, you and I, we're the most romantic people in Danville, we created a big dramatic love story, we go out on big dates, we're the 'perfect couple', but Phineas and Mishti? You know, he doesn't get romance, she doesn't want romance. That right there," Isabella pointed to them. She was just offering him the bag of chips. "That is their kind of romantic moment."

"What do you think this is preempting?" Phineas asked her. "A Spanish soap opera?"

She giggled. "Oh, my mother watches the Indian soap operas all the time. They're horrendous." She took a piece of her hair and used it to make a mustache. She held up her fingers in a gun. "Ricardo, I'm sorry, but I must kill you to save my father." She said dramatically in a bad Spanish accent.

"If you kill me…" Phineas replied, matching her accent. "You WILL be killing your father. DUN DUN DUN!" They burst out laughing.

"Oh Feerrb." Isabella said cockily.

I sighed. Oh great… Mishti really was Phineas' perfect match.

Once again, the tables have turned on Ferb and Phineas just like they did with Isabella and Ginger. Who's the one with the FWB? And who's the one stuck in his brother's sex life? If you took AP English, you would definitely be able to find my themes and symbols and motifs and blah blah. Like always, please review, because this is the last chapter I had set in stone. Throw some suggestions out for our poor couples and see what happens next.