Seph's POV

Breathe. Just breathe. I can't understand what happened. He kissed me. I kissed him back. I don't know how I make it back to my apartment. I'm happy Matt isn't here. Thinking of Matt made me feel sick. We had a huge fight. Not even sure we are still together. If I even want to be together. He promised to be more diligent about sedatives. Yet my patient was unconscious the whole day. He could have died. Matt has been privileged his whole life, has never been told no. He doesn't understand his actions can hurt others and I told him all of this. He got pissed. Said I was afraid of commitment and just looking for excuses to not be with him. It went on and on. He stormed out with a bag of his things. Then I got the call saying my patient was having a meltdown and demanding me. Joker. These past few days have filled my head with him. I need space. I have 2 more days. Only 8 more total hours with him. Then I can put some distance, work with other patients, and move on.

My body didn't want to move on. It wanted more of him. His lips, his warm body against mine. Then that soft laugh. It was so sweet with almost a youthful hilt to it. It gave me butterflies. I was playing a dangerous game. I went to bed knowing that I'd dream of the things I wish he could do to me but I could never allow.

…..

I woke up and gave myself a pep talk. I could do this. It helped my brother called on the way to work. He could tell I was distracted but rambled on. It was good hearing from him. He seemed happy but I worried about him though. His borderline personality disorder made it hard for the happiness to be long lasting. He always said it was like he was constantly sabotaging everything good in his life. My heart went out to him and I made promises that I'd visit soon.

My heart was racing harder and harder the closer it got to our session. Finally it was time and I felt like I was having a heart attack. He was already there and he just smiled at me. Not menacing, not theatrically. A real "I'm so happy to see you" smile. It caught me and him both off guard. My stomach filled with butterflies and he shook his head and looked down.

I sat down in my seat not knowing what to do. Even dating typically I was quiet but at least confident. Right now I feel like a teenage girl on her first date. Oh my God, I'm comparing a therapy session to a date. I blush wilting from embarrassment.

He looks up at me with these vulnerable ice blue eyes of his and it's like the green hair, tattoos, and pale skin are gone and I catch my breath. As soon as I blink it's gone. All I can say is "Hi"

He laughs. A genuine and beautiful laugh. It would make any girl swoon. "Well hello." He seems more comfortable with himself and I'm just a wreck. I don't even know what to do. I don't know how to start this session.

"What is Seph short for?" He asks me. It takes me off guard. I don't tell a lot of people. Mostly because they laugh. So I don't know what in my right mind possessed me to tell the Joker of all people.

"Persephone." I whisper. He does chuckle a bit causing me to go red with embarrassment. I should have kept my mouth shut but instead I just say more. "My mother loved old mythology stories. Plus she had a sick sense of humor. Let's name my children after Greek mythology." I roll my eyes but smile. "She hated her name was Marie, wanted something interesting. I paid the price." I chuckle a bit.

"She sounds like my kind of gal. A torture that will last forever. But I find your name beautiful. I always liked the story of Persephone." He looks honest and sincere but I'm skeptical. "You have siblings?" He asks surprised.

"Just one. An older brother. His name is Hector." a part of me thinks I shouldn't tell a psychopath about my brother or my family in general. But moments like this make it hard to remember he's murdered people and hurts people for fun.

"What about you?" I don't even think before I ask but I see his eyes go dark and he's back to the old joker.

"I see what you are trying to do." He stands up and throws his hands on the desk hard. Ignoring his hurt hand. "Is this your game? Reveal shit about yourself, stuff that's probably not even true? Just to coax information out of me?"

He's violent and I know I'm about to get hurt. Not even the grabbing me and slamming me, like the lucky to get out alive kind. I'm not sure what comes over me and I'm convinced I have zero self preservation. My mind says cower and beg but next thing I know my arms wrap around his neck at the same time my lips meet his. He growls against my lips, his body is tense. His hands rest on my rib cage grabbing me tight. I can tell he's warring with himself; hurt me or kiss me?

I pull back for a breath and he's still tense and look at him with apology written in my eyes. His hands slide to my hips and pull me to a passionate kiss. It grows deeper and he picks me up with my legs wrapped around his hips. My back is pushed against a wall but not roughly, more passionately. His hands un tuck my blouse from my dress pants. His hand touching my skin right above my pants line. The contact makes me moan. It's like electricity flowing. I get goose bumps and he deepens the kiss, one hand on my hip sliding to underneath my belly button and then back. The other hand at the base of my neck and collarbone. My hand are on his face, through his hair, on his chest, anywhere I can touch.

It's not enough. I want more. He can sense it and I can feel how much he wants it to. He growls and he pulls away and I'm left from the sudden broken contact, cold and shocked.

"I can't do this. I can't do this." He says. I'm confused. He keeps going. "Yes you can, she means nothing. Nothing." He hits his head. The voices. Like a bucket of cold water poured over me, I realize he's my patient. I took advantage of my sick and vulnerable patient. I feel sick to my stomach. Everyone looks at him as this master villain, a manipulator, a con artist, but I was his doctor. I should have known better.

I'm fighting tears when I look at him, afraid to touch him and make it worse. "I'm so sorry." I say, my voice breaking before I run out of there.