My left hand was either resting on my lips or my chest whilst my right was busy searching the name Tom Hiddleston on the internet. There were so many hits on the name with news about his current whereabouts, his love life, his career and quotes. There were so many rumours too. I was constantly gasping and cursing under my breath as my wide eyes grasp information after information from the laptop screen. I was writing down notes on a blank page so I would be able to remember every piece of information and there was a lot. Some contradicted each other and some did not make sense because Tom did not seem like what the rumours would suggest even though I have not known him for a long time.

Despite all this, there was one photograph I found of Tom and myself. It seemed like we were at a party of some sort and we were seated in a corner across from each other. We didn't seem to acknowledge our photograph being taken because of the deep look that our eyes held in the photograph. Tom was in an extravagant suit leaning towards me with his elbows leaning on his knees and his hands holding mine. He held a deep and sincere look in his eyes as he stared at me as if he was in a dreamy state. I however looked like I was in the middle of saying something to him with my mouth half open with a hint of a smile but my eyes head the same deep and sincere look like he had. Anyone who observed this photograph could quite possibly say that we were in love. Absolutely nobody and nothing was distracting us from each other and for a second I felt my heart flutter. Is this what I had with him? Just by looking at this photograph I could see that I was a lucky woman.

I sighed and minimised the photograph and glanced at my notes. According to the information I retrieved; he is currently dating me, he is currently working on a new movie that will be in cinemas early next year, he has a lot of female fans, his popularity grew after his role in Thor as Loki… Loki? I stared at the blank wall of my lounge room where I was comfortably seated on soft cushions on the floor with the laptop on my lap. "That explains…" I jumped up and ran into my room and stood in front of my comic book collections. "Everything." I stared at all the Thor collectables I had. Of course I knew I was not a Loki fan! I was only a Loki fan because of Tom! I remember clearly being a Thor fan back in my childhood when the cartoons were popular obviously because they portrayed Loki as the villain (obviously) and he stood as the ugliest god ever.

I threw myself on my bed and shut my eyes. This was all too surreal. How was I supposed to deal with not having any memory of the last three years, being in a foreign country and a foreign job and having a boyfriend that is a famous actor? It was too much!

My eyes cracked open when the sound of the front door was heard. It was obviously Tom from his trip to his house and buying dinner. I spent a few seconds breathing in and out while thinking of how to act calm and cool about this new discovery. Should I just be relaxed and walk out of my room and lean on the door frame and say 'So you're an actor. Cool.' I could be happy and excited and pounced on him with a hug and kiss on the cheek, 'Tom why did you not tell me you're a famous actor? Now that I know this, I feel like I am getting closer to you!' I shook my head at that last projection of my thoughts. No way am I acting like that. I settled on the former thought, to act cool and relaxed.

"There you are," Tom was already in my room. He lifted a bag of Chinese food, "Let's dig in while it's hot."

My mind went blank and I forgot how to act. I just stared at him trying to buy time while brain was in the process of rebooting.

"Don't tell me you have already eaten, I know I was gone for awhile but I hadn't realised that I had mail and -,"

"That's fine!" I forced myself to grin. "Let's start eating, I'm starving!" I wasn't really. My stomach was doing all kinds of somersaults making me feel uneasy all over.

He chuckled and mentioned something about getting a drink from the fridge before he paused and looked at me. It wasn't just any casual look yet it was more like he was studying me. He lifted his head slightly while his piercing eyes stayed on me and when I thought I could not handle his intimidating, studious glare, he finally turned and left the room.

I assumed that my actions were not genuine and he took note of that. I did not know how to ignore the fact that there is a very well-known actor in my apartment. I paced quickly behind him and couldn't help to absorb his appearance just to confirm that he was indeed the man I saw on the television and on the internet. I bit my bottom lip to stop a frustrated sigh.

I hadn't realised that my eyes were glued on the man sitting across me hungrily eating his dinner without wasting a breath. I absently twirled my chopstick in my Chinese food whilst taking in his features as I have been constantly doing since he stepped foot into my apartment. My mind kept questioning why I have not recognised that he was a famous actor. That he might just be new to his career which might explain why I do not know him. However it does not explain why his popularity status is so high at this time. Was his celebrity status just like other well-known actors such as Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp? Although, his role as Loki was so unrecognisable, I would not have known that it was him. There might be a probability that his roles require him to look completely different to how he looks naturally.

I pressed my lips together and rested my chin in the palm of my hand and watched him eat. He did not act like he was a super famous celebrity at all. His head was not in the clouds; actually, he was conveniently down to earth and very realistic. On the other hand, how did he even begin to date me? Let alone, how did he meet me in the first place? Why is he even dating me? Why is he dating me now when I cannot remember? Do his fans despise me? Do the media know about me, or did I just have what they call a '15 minute fame'? Why am I dating a famous person? How did I handle his fame? Why am I dating an actor, they can lie very easily…

I started to scowl at all the jumbled thoughts that were tangling the many wires of my brain's nerve cells.

"Lara."

"Hmm?" at this point I was staring into space.

"Are you okay?" Tom stopped eating. His elbows leaned on the table and leaned in toward me.

I sighed and masked my face with my hands, "I'm not sure."

"You're not sure?" he lifted an eyebrow and leaned in closer. "What's wrong?"

I sighed again and cupped my left cheek and looked at him dolefully. "Why didn't you tell me? Was it because you thought I couldn't handle your celebrity status?"

Tom looked speechless. His eyebrows were raised in a surprised expression and his eyes held so much concern and uneasiness. "Lara, I'm sorry…" he was obviously lost for words. "I did not tell you because of that, of course not, I just," he leaned back in his chair. "You told me when we first met that you don't feel comfortable around celebrities and it took awhile for you to warm up to me, so, I was afraid that you will keep your distance from me because of this."

"You were afraid of-," I scoffed. "Why do you act like I'm the most significant thing to you?"

"What do you mean 'why'? Of course you're significant to me! You're my girlfriend even though it might not seem like it right now because I have been giving you space but believe me before all this happened, we were deeply in love. Look Lara, I know how you might feel with having no memory but please, I'm begging you, don't let this come in between us. Being a celebrity does not mean much to me Lara, I just love my job as an actor… the fame just sort of came with it. I don't want you to push me away because of this," his pleading eyes were stained in my memories.

I nodded slowly, "I just need a moment to get my head around it," I pulled a cynical face. "Or maybe the night... I don't know."

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