Hot Damn Chapter 19: We've Done Good, a d.gray-man fanfic

Hot Damn 17

Sorry guys! Shit how long has it been? I was a bit busy after my previous update. Some shit happened like writers block for a while and we all hate that. And then I got dragged into the world of Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles and I'm still fangirling over it. But seriously go read it. And I'm still slightly pissed off at Shounen Jump for putting their works on hiatus for this week, and seriously miffed for them sticking D. Gray Man on hiatus for the second week in a row. But they deserve some down time. School starts in a week for me so if I don't finish this by then I hope you guys understand my absence. ANYWAYS, I FEEL SO AWFUL FOR MAKING YOU GUYS SUFFER WITHOUT AN UPDATE! But I'm back now and thanks so much to all of you for the wonderful reviews! I mean it, they're seriously hardcore. I made this chapter longer as compensation. Enjoy the chapter!

WARNING: Kanda being a prick and his foul mouth, Lavi being a nosy bastard, Lenalee being a smart aleck and Allen being bitchy about Cross. SLIGHT FLUFF. DD LONG CHAPTERS ARE LONG.

DISCLAIMER: Hoshina Katsura

Seventeen: We've done good.

Wednesday, 4:30pm. Lenalee's house.

Whining. Kanda never liked it and never will. And now he has another reason to never like it. That reason was the one and only Allen Walker. Lavi had oh-so-kindly told the moyashi to 'let it all out', and he took the chance and whined. Cross is such a bastard, he's so lazy, he womanizes and all that shit the Kanda could care less about. But he had to agree, Cross was a bastard. How dare he throw the moyashi out the door? But of course he'd never admit it out loud. Just to make him feel better he threw darts at a crudely drawn picture by Allen that had Cross breathing fire with a body of a dragon that he stole when the moyashi wasn't looking. He wouldn't miss it, his bag and probably his locker were overflowing with other variations of Cross drawn in some deformed way.

Maybe he was going crazy that he actually got pissed when Allen came to school with a bruise or a swollen cheek…maybe. Shouldn't that be considered child abuse? Cross was Allen's bloody guardian and he slapped him. Really, what the fuck is up with that? So currently Lavi, Lenalee, Allen and he were sitting in Lenalee's garage that was decorated with a couch, an arm chair and a fold up chair; listening to Allen complain.

"He's impossible! I think God is testing me sticking me with him." Allen muttered crossing his arms across his chest pouting. Lavi laughed at the white haired boy from the couch.

It wasn't the best couch in the world but it was their couch. Before Allen showed up, the three had decided to buy a couch. Of course they were broke and their petty minimum wage jobs certainly weren't going to cut it. So through much agony they went along with the idea of a car wash. Kanda literally had to restrain Komui to a chair and restrain the chair to the wall since he absolutely did not want 'predators' eyeing his Lenalee like a piece of meat. Especially when she was wet, of course he didn't care about the two boys being eyed. Finally after about six hours of Lavi almost being killed by Kanda for spraying the Japanese with a hose repeatedly and nearly 78 cars with trucks included they got the money they wanted and bought a bright baby blue couch. Kanda thought it was the ugliest couch he'd ever seen but Lavi treated it like it was his own child. Yeah, creepy.

"So guys, it's about 4 ½ weeks until prom. Allen, have you thought about who you're going to go with?" Lenalee asked innocently trying to change the subject. She was concerned with Allen but listening to his complaints over and over was kind of annoying.

"Erm…" Allen looked at the Japanese sitting on the chair and blushed the tiniest bit. "I-I don't really know…"

"Well you better land yourself one before all the good ones are gone." Lavi teased bursting into laughter once more when he saw Allen blush starting to look flustered.

"Then who're you going with Lavi?" Allen shot trying to get the attention off of him not appreciating the looks from Kanda.

"Me? Well depends, there's so many fish in the sea." The redhead waved the question off not really answering it; he shouldn't be the one worrying. "Anyways, Yu-pon, given it any thought?"

"Fuck off rabbit." Kanda growled.

"No need to be all nasty Yu." Lavi pouted childishly as he got up and sauntered over to Allen who was having a side conversation with Lenalee.

"I mean, if you don't act quickly little Brit here is going to get swept off his feet by some one else." The red head said casually as he slung his arm around Allen's shoulders and pulled him closer. "Right, Allen?"

"Erm…?" The white haired boy answered unsurely as he was pulled into what seemed like a possessive hug by Lavi.

Kanda growled albeit a bit jealously to himself as he watched Lavi hug the moyashi.

"You like him! You just want to go over there and tear Allen away from that good looking friend of yours and confess your undying love to him!" The voice teased annoyingly making Kanda twitch.

"Shut the fuck up you little bastard." Kanda threatened inwardly still watching as Lavi talked with the moyashi.

Thursday, 12:02pm – lunch.

"Lavi, you do have the notes right?" Lenalee inquired trying to ignore the queasy unsure felling that was bubbling in the pit of her stomach.

"Of course! Why would I come unprepared on a possible suicide mission?" Lavi replied almost happily as he crept closer to Kanda's locker. Lenalee cringed at 'suicide' but brushed it off.

"I kind of feel bad for lying to Allen like that…" The Chinese girl sighed as she followed her friend.

They'd told Kanda and Allen that she'd forgotten something and took Lavi with her to go get it which is a complete lie. The two had actually gone off to plant a note in Kanda and Allen's lockers to keep their plan up. Hopefully in the few minutes they'd been gone Kanda hadn't torn Allen to bits, vise versa.

"Well think of it this way, when this plan works you'll feel a whole lot better." Lavi explained as he slipped a note marked for Kanda into said person's locker.

"You mean 'if' our plan works, right?" Lenalee corrected as she turned a corner into another hall that held the white haired boys locker.

"No, I mean 'when'." The redhead stated firmly as he handed the note for Allen to his friend.

Lenalee sighed and rolled her eyes at Lavi's sureness. Slipping the note in the two took off down the hall back to the lunch room before certain doom occurred. If they were lucky, it hadn't started…yet.

Kanda was still slightly annoyed at the fact that all through lunch the Moyashi kept complaining. Sure that Cross guy was a bastard but he really didn't need to hear about it 24/7. Kanda had snapped 3 lunch trays in half, nearly ripped some guy's throat wishing it was Allen's, and bent 2 metal spoons. No he wasn't a physic; he was just really ticked off.

He absentmindly turned the dial on his lock and pulled it open so he could grab his books for his next class. The Japanese reached for his bio textbook when he saw an envelope addressed to him. He contemplated on just throwing it out but it seemed safe considering the fact that it wasn't pink and frilly and shit nor did it smell like overpriced perfume that smelt like the bad side of a dumpster. Still eyeing the note, Kanda shrugged and

stuffed the note into his pocket before he gathered the rest of his books. He'd read it later.

Allen blinked at the envelope he'd found in his locker after lunch. It wasn't like he hadn't received something in an envelope before (usually it was more debts inside or death threats he'd been getting lately kindly from BaKanda's fan club) but he deemed it safe since it was addressed to him not to Cross, that meant it wasn't debts. The threats usually were addressed to him as 'lowly filth' or 'undeserving trash' or somewhere along those lines so it was just a normal note of some sort. It didn't bother him since we all know Allen was the overflowing fountain of never ending optimism. Allen slipped the envelope into his notebook and closed his locker, darting down the halls before he was late for class. He'd read it some other time, maybe during class.

Kanda,

Lavi and I planned a treat for you. We noticed that you seemed a little more stressed out than usual so we decided to do something nice. Don't scoff at me mister. I know you're sitting there quirking your brow in that same way you do when you're doubting something. Anyways, of course I came up with the entire thing since Lavi would probably drag you around trying to make you enjoy yourself. I would've told you myself but it's a surprise. I hope you're not making that 'yeah, right, that's a load of bull shit' face. Now before you crumple this up and throw it away, I know you hate surprises but I think you'll like this one. So meet us at the park Friday after school.

Lenalee.

PS. Don't worry, I made sure that there's absolutely no talk about Cross.

Kanda rolled his eyes at the note. Of course, Lenalee, she'd be the only girl in school to send him a NORMAL looking note. He sighed irritably but decided to go anyways. Not because he feared Lenalee's view of 'surprise', no sir Yu Kanda was not afraid, he was just mildly disturbed at what the girl had been thinking when she was writing this. He absently twitched at the parts in which Lenalee had described him doing something when he was or was planning to. Even if it meant risking the rest of his entire day for a surprise that could maybe kill him. Maybe.

Allen,

You know ever since you got here we haven't had any you-me time at all! It's always going around with Lenalee and Yu-pon (not that there's anything wrong with that) and never any 'us' time. (No I'm not talking about 'bondage', sheesh Brit.) Well maybe except for that time when you were sick but you were sleeping most of the time. Anyways, I heard Lenalee is taking Yu-pon off our hands so he can wind down because lately he's been a lot more nasty than usual. Not that we don't already know that the guy has a pole so far up his ass that we may never find it. We think its stress. So that means we have a day to ourselves! Meet me at the park Friday after school!

Lavi your super sexy best friend.

PS. And this is also for a chance for you to relax. That means to talk about Cross or I'll have to smack you!

Allen laughed a bit after reading the note. But it did seem like a good idea to spend some quality time with Lavi. I mean what's the worst that could happen? Wait, don't answer that. He felt the edge of his mouth quirk up at the part with the pole up BaKanda's ass. Yup, Allen was pretty sure that fact was true. He shrugged slipping the note into his pocket before the teacher realized, he'd go, I mean, a day without BaKanda or Cross? He'd take that deal up any day.

Friday, 3:43pm. Park.

Damned fucking fangirls and their shitty 'gifts'. Kanda irritably ripped the last of the notes that he'd found practically bursting out of his locker after school. Not just notes but chocolates, roses and all that shitty romantic junk. It was like the Valentines Day that would've been if he'd gone to school. No, he didn't run away and hide. Kanda had a reason why he hadn't gone to school on Valentines Day. His 'father' Tiedoll had 'graciously' decided to spend the only time he had with his dear 'son' before he had to leave again for his backpacking trip through Europe. Not that he'd enjoyed it. It was either that or the Valentine from hell. That day was just a promotional day for Hershey's and Hallmark to make a few extra thousands or so and to brainwash customers into buying pointless shit they don't need.

Anyways there was just as much pink and awful smelling perfume. He'd have to disinfect and fumigate his locker later. But no, it didn't stop there. The 'fangirls' had made a truce amongst them and bombarded him with themselves. They clawed at him trying to get their manicured little hands on as much of him as they could. After ramming his way out of the mass of limbs he'd taken a straight sprint to the park. He cursed under his breath noticing he was missing a button on his shirt. Damned crazy girls. So now here he was sitting on a bench radiating a mass of irritate anger waiting for the only 'normal' girl he knew, Lenalee.

Fuck no, he didn't think of her that way. Hell, if he did Komui would hunt him down and shoot him on the spot only to revive him and do it again. She was like the little sister he never had or asked for. Seriously, he'd never asked for it. It just came up to him one day when he was eight and slapped him in the fucking face, literally…ouch.

Allen hummed to himself as he enjoyed his stroll to the park. Despite the nasty glares he'd received from what looked like disappointed fangirls he felt relatively happy. Sure Lavi was strange and maybe a bit crazy but he meant well. Even though he didn't see how he meant well with the flyer incident. Allen twitched at that but didn't let it get the better of him. He was going to have fun. Even if it killed him…which it might since this is Lavi we're talking about.

Snapping out of his thoughts when he neared the spot where he was supposed to meet Lavi he came to a screeching halt when instead of Lavi waiting for him it was Kanda in all his bitchy glory.

Fuck.

Maybe he could run. Yeah, that might work. But then again he wasn't a coward…scratch that. He just had a lot of determination…or a death wish. Really, what did he have to lose? (Except his head.) It could just be a coincidence that the guy who hates his guts is sitting there where Lavi should be but isn't…right? Allen breathed in and ever so slowly approached Kanda not wanting to make any unnecessary movement. He couldn't help but laugh to himself. He was like the hunter creeping towards his prey. But then again, it was more like the hunter becoming the hunted when it came to Kanda. He'd probably try to gut him and throw his body into a river.

Allen stopped in place. Okay, he really wasn't looking forward to an early death. Heck, he wasn't looking forward to death at all. But he did always wonder what it felt like to die. No, he's not trying to sound emo. Allen oh-so slowly turned around and started to go off with all his organs in tact. But what happened next was what happened in almost every movie. He stepped on a stupid twig that appeared out of nowhere. Seriously, it wasn't there before. So SNAP. Allen cringed and froze in place. He would not make any movement until it was safe. It felt like hell froze over when he

felt a pair of eyes trying to burn through his back. He turned around once more to sheepishly smile at Yu Kanda in all his pissed off scariness.

Oh shit.

Lavi grinned evilly as he watched Allen step on the 'planted' twig. Oh yes, he'd been behind that. How else would he get dear Yu-pon to notice the Brit?

"This is going well." Lenalee chirped from her perch behind Lavi. She was currently preparing to blackmail two certain people flipping her trusty phone open.

"Well duh! Hand me my bag would you?" Lavi replied happily as he kept and eye on Allen and see what was going to happen.

"Erm." Lenalee looked over at the horrifying sack that Lavi called a bag. Yes sir the one and only backpack from hell that devours squirrels. "No thanks…I'd rather not touch it. I might provoke it."

"Pfft. It doesn't bite!" The redhead scoffed as he turned around to grab his bag himself.

"Oh right, it eats things." The Chinese girl stated quietly to herself.

Just as Lavi placed his bag on the ground after retrieving a pair of binoculars the bag swallowed a poor unsuspecting sparrow.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Kanda questioned venom lacing his tone.

"Um…exercise?" Allen replied scolding himself inwardly for the bad excuse.

"Yeah, right. That's not a load of bull shit." The Japanese replied sarcastically.

"Well then what are you doing here?" The white haired boy retorted turning around completely.

"I'm meeting some one; you have a fucking problem with that?" Kanda growled annoyed. He was not in the mood but picking on the moyashi was a must do.

"What? You finally gave into some girl?" Allen mocked noticing the trash can full of pink. It looked like Valentines Day in a can.

"Fuck no. What does it matter to you, moyashi? Jealous?" Kanda smirked as he watched Allen try to retort something back at him but kept tripping over his own words while trying to control the blush on his face.

The Japanese dug into his pocket trying to find his phone so he could turn off that insanely annoying ring tone that belonged to Lenalee.

"What?" He growled into the phone. Lenalee should've been here about 20 minutes ago.

"Kanda? Hey, it's me. Anyways sorry but something came up and I can't leave the house. Lavi got caught by Bookman and he's stuck on reviewing the Spanish Inquisition."

"Great, so I can go the fuck home?"

"Silly, course not. Is Allen there?"

"Sadly."

"Don't be like that. Well, you're just going to have to hang around with him. Go to a movie or go to the mall."

"What? Fuck no. Why the hell should I hang out with that idiot?"

"Because of you don't there's a certain picture I got my hands on of you and Allen when he was sick."

"You wouldn't." Kanda hissed.

"Oh I would. And I'd let Lavi get his devious little mind in on it too."

"Don't you dare."

"Dare me. Anyways, have fun! And remember, I have my eyes on you. If you ditch little Allen then the picture goes to Lavi."

"This is blasphemy." Kanda growled unhappily.

"That's nice. Have fun!" And with a click the line went dead.

"Damn. This is fucked up." The Japanese stood up and looked over where the moyashi had finally calmed down. He didn't even want to know why or how she had a that picture but knowing Lenalee she did have it somewhere and he'd find it and every possible copy and destroy them.

"Oi, moyashi."

"My name is Allen!" The white haired boy corrected with a huff.

"Whatever. You're coming with me." Kanda started walking in the opposite direction from where Allen was standing.

"How come? I'm supposed to meet Lavi here!" Allen answered as he begrudgingly trudged along behind the taller male. Sure Kanda was older than Allen but still, he was a giant.

"Well we're being blackmailed by those two fucks and like any other day I have to be around you, I just want to get it over with so I can go the fuck home." The Japanese hissed annoyed and ticked off. He knew they were being watched. He swore he was going to seriously stab Lavi repeatedly, have him hospitalized and when he got out he was going to stab him some more. As for Lenalee, fuck Komui and his fucking giant drill, he was going to push her out of a plane and hope she lands on her skinny little neck.

"…What is it this time?" Allen asked keeping his head down.

"…I'm not even going to mention it to you of all people." Kanda gritted out grinding his teeth together.

Allen groaned, suddenly wanting to go die in a hole. If Kanda wasn't going to talk about it then it was probably bad. Why did the bad stuff always happen to him?

"Why me? What did I ever do? I believe in God but now I think he just hates me." The white haired by muttered, trying to keep up with Kanda's long strides.

"Let's see, you were fucking born." Kanda stated still walking. Maybe he could lose the midget in the mall. But he really hated the mall. It was loud, unsanitary, smelt of fast food, crowded and the shops were pretty much all shitty or overflowing with preppy school girls gushing over the newest CD from some overrated boy band.

"Please tell me we're not going to the mall." Allen stated grudgingly as he saw the oversized building coming into view.

"Well we are so deal with it. It's not like I want to fucking go either." Kanda growled stuffing his hands in his pockets.

Those two were going to hell just so Kanda could bring them back and send them back again. It was going to be a long day.

"Um, just to clarify, you don't have the picture…right?" Lavi asked as he calmed down from his fit of laughter when he saw Allen's urge to dump his smoothie on Kanda. But that would be such a girl thing to do so he just whacked Kanda over the head.

"Course not. But I wish I did." Lenalee sighed brushing back a few stray strands of hair behind her ear.

"So…you lied." The redhead drawled slowly.

"Yup."

"But I thought you felt bad when you lied." Lavi stated scratching the back of his head idly.

"Not if it's for their own good." Lenalee pointed out waving a finger with a triumphant smile.

"…Nice."

"Yup."

Oh dear.

"Fucking bat shit." Kanda cursed as he grabbed Allen's wrist and dragged him away from the approaching fangirls holding up a giant 'WE LOVE KANDA' banner.

"Wh-what? Where are we going?" Allen asked snapping out of his small shock of being dragged.

"Away from them." Kanda growled ducking into a small music store.

Allen looked out from behind a shelf stacked with CD's to see a mob of girls looking dumbfounded wondering where their object of desire went. The white haired boy snickered a bit at the taller male's 'misfortune'. For any other guy they'd love being chased by girls nonstop. But Kanda wasn't much like other guys. He hated pretty much everything in the world. But we all know that already.

"Gee Kanda, I thought you'd love a girlfriend seeing as how you're so grumpy all the time." Allen teased resisting the urge to jab a finger at him.

"Shut the fuck up moyashi, you'd hate it too." Kanda hissed slipping out from behind the shelf after the mob had left thinking he went to the food court. The white haired boy rolled his eyes following the older male.

Bastard.

"Well…that went…relatively well." Lavi muttered slightly numb from what he'd seen but otherwise gushing with happiness.

"…Yeah…" Lenalee drawled carefully a smile forming on her face.

"We're not dreaming right? We just saw what we did right?" Lavi asked for reassurance.

Lenalee nodded dumbly.

"So…we just witnessed Kanda…and Allen…kissing."

"Yup."

"And Allen kissed back."

"Apparently."

Quiet settled. The two looked at each other with wide smiles on their faces.

"Well Captain, I think we're nearing our finale." Lenalee stated with a squeal.

"Right you are my dear Commodore." Lavi agreed with a goofy grin spread across his face.

"We're genius."

Okay. I'm really sure this is happening but I do not really believe it. Allen thought to himself blushing madly. Why didn't our dear Brit believe it? A: He was currently locking lips with the guy who he's had what he thought the displeasure of ever meeting. B: The guy who he's locking lips with hates his guts. And C: He was locking lips with Yuu Kanda. Yup, no wonder he didn't believe it. And to add on to the list of 'not believing' he was apparently kissing back.

Okay, really didn't see this coming. The white haired boy said to himself ducking his head down after trying to hide his blush.

He muttered a few 'Yes' and 'No's' as Kanda interrogated him a bit as if nothing happened but that bastard knew full well what happened. And Allen could feel that smug smirk of his boring into him.

"Well I'm going the fuck home." He heard the older male say. Allen just nodded still not looking up mumbling a quick 'bye'. He sat there for awhile even after Kanda was gone.

Great, now I'm going to be up all night.

Friday, 8:23pm.

"Ugh…" Allen threw his pencil down in exasperation. He was trying to study for final exams since he certainly wasn't going to sleep soundly. Not just because of what happened with Kanda earlier but because he could hear Cross' drunken laugh all the way down the hall as he flirted with some girls he picked up from a bar God-knows-where.

"Stupid Kanda…" He muttered softly laying his head on his desk and closing his eyes.

"You know, even though we got somewhere today with those two, I can't help but feel like I invaded their privacy." Lenalee sighed over the phone gently.

"Yeah but you have to admit, we've done good." Lavi said with a forlorn expression on his face. He plopped down onto his bed with a soft thud and breathed satisfied with their days work. It was finally feeling worth it.