Caity:Alrighty-o! I'm here and ready to type up my second chapter!...so do you wanna know what I've been doing on my vacation?!? Well first I went looking for big foot in never-never land-
Kankuro: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS ISN'T A BREACH IN MY CONTRACT!!!....AS LONG AS SHE TAKES NO CREDIT FOR ME AND MAKES NO MONEY IT'S FINE!! WHAT THE HELL KINDA' AGENT ARE YOU!! I SHOULDA STUCK WITH THE SQUIRREL!!! AT LEAST HE GAVE ME FREE PENS!! PENS!! WHAT DO YOU GIVE AWAY?!? FREE BUSINESS CARDS?!? Hangs up phone and throws it away
Caity: Uhm Kankuro weren't you going to do that last chapter?
Kankuro: Well I got so caught up in giving you a 'What crack are you on' look, I forgot..
Caity: Oh...well since your here do a disclaimer! And sing it!!!
Kankuro: Y-no!
Caity: Oh come on....Puppy eyes
Kankuro:....fine
Caity: ..Sucker....works every time!
Kankuro: Sings Caity owns nothing! She is but a poor highschool student trying to make her way on their lousy salary! And for that we are glad as she would surely make the red-headed freakazoid the main character instead of someone much more deserving such as me-
Caity: Ok I think that they get it! Man you really need to work on your singing skills, that didn't have a tune and it didn't even rhyme! Gah you suck! I shoulda asked Gaara!
Kankuro: Glares
Caity:...
Tash and Terese: Enjoy the story! ^^
Nae: I is awesome!
Bold is for inners and empahasise on certain words
Italics is for thoughts
Normal writing is for....normal writing...
Nae's class
"Ok everyone..now that they're gone...." Nae trailed off as she rubbed her hands together and evil-laughed, in her head of course, it wouldn't do if everyone thought she was insane now would it? Unfortunately Larry chose this moment to appear (Yes, Nae has an inner, she swears she's not crazy but sometimes I wonder. We call him Larry...).
LET'S BURN THIS PLACE TO DOWN TO CINDERS!!
No Larry I don't think that we should..we could get in trouble..
NO! LETS BURN THESE BITCHES INTO THE GROUND!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!
Larry....
Don't you Larry me! You know that you want to....
Well....
Do it...
Ok!! Give me that match!
That's my girl.
Meanwhile all the so-called 'students' looked at their so called 'teacher' wearily, maybe she was insane and that's why they left Gaara a little red button, maybe she forgot to take her meds... Needless to say when she held up a flaming match they were scared.
"La la la la la la!" Nae sung as she skipped around the tables setting this, that and the other on fire.
"Naruto do something!" Sakura screamed as she jumped up onto her desk.
"I'm trying but this book doesn't have any answers!!" Naruto cried flipping through a maths exercise book. (Yeah I stole this line from the Simpsons movie...I thought it was something Naruto would say.)
"Gaara you useless lump! Push the red button!" Kankuro demanded as he repeatedly hit Socky against the desk trying to put out the fire on Socky's head.
"Oh right!" Gaara said as he sprung into action, in full slow motion he got up, walked the two whole steps to the red button and pressed it...... Nothing happened. Gaara's eyes widened as he repeatedly pressed the buttton.
"It's not working!!!" Fed up Gaara punched the stupid button, effectively breaking it.
"Gaara!" Temari screeched in horror, now what were they gonna do, they had no weapons or anything and the crazy teacher now had a...fire extinguisher??
In the staff room
"BEEP.........BEEP....BEEP! BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BE-"
"Um do you think they need our help?" Terese asked nervously as she looked at the little red device in Caity's hand that had been beeping.
"Nah! See the beeping stopped, they'll be fine! After all Nae doesn't have any matches.." Caity said waving her hand dismissively.
"Yeah..no matches...." Tash said as she glanced from side to side.
"See Terese? They'll be fine!"
Back in the classroom
"Shikamaru! Shikamaru! Shikamaru! What are we going to do? Shikamaru!!" Chouji whined as he shoved Shikamaru's arm in an attempt to wake him up while at the same time protecting the precious chips with his life.
"..Wha? Chouji? What's wrong?" Shikamaru mumbled as he opened his eyes.
"...." Chouji said nothing he just pointed to behind Shikamaru, where the insane teacher was squirting Neji with a fire extinguisher and giggling uncontrollably, whilst Tenten was dying with laughter. Eventually the fire extinguisher emptied so she threw it out the window and dusted her hands off before going back to her desk and falling asleep.
"That's what's wrong....Shikamaru? Shikamaru?" Chouji looked back at his, once again asleep, teammate and sighed. Sasuke, because he's so 'cool', watched the scene with interest, he particularly liked the part where Neji was attacked by the fire extinguisher, Sakura was still on her desk, Naruto was looking for answers in every book he could find, at the moment he was looking through an atlas, Tenten was still laughing, Neji had attempted to wipe away all the white stuff so that he could see and had only succeeded in making it worse, resulting in Tenten's laughter tripling. Gaara was glaring at the stupid red button, Kankuro was bandaging Socky's wounds, Temari was glaring at Gaara glaring at the button, Ino was trying to save her hair, as Nae had set it on fire too so it was quite singed, Hinata just sat there eyes wide staring at the blackboard, ignoring the chaos around her, Kiba was running around in circles like chicken without a head whilst Shino was sipping tea and eating muffins.
"WHOO!! THIS LESSON IS SO YOUTHFUL!! OUR TEACHER IS ABLE TO LIGHT THE FIRE OF YOUTH!! JUST LIKE GAI-SENSEI!!!" Lee shouted enthusiastically doing his signature sparkly grin with a thumbs up.
"Hey! Bushy-brow! Keep it down will ya' I'm close to finding a solution!" Naruto scolded as he threw the atlas over his shoulder and picked up a dictionary.
"Well I believe that fate has decided our destinies....we are destined to-" Neji was cut off by Tenten's laughter, glaring at her he continued.
"We are destined to die!! Nuiiooooo!!! I never got to see Jamaica..."
"Look nobody's gonna die..I propose we offer the red-head loser to the psyco red-headed demon!" Kankuro cried as he pointed to Gaara, who switched his glare from the broken button to his traitor of a brother.
"We are not sacrificing anyone-" Kiba was cut off by Nae yawning and moving her head to the other side "AH! It's waking up! Sacrifice the freak!" he screamed as he shoved Gaara in front of him as a shield.
"We are not sacrificing me! I am the Kazekage!"
"All the more reason to sacrifice you!"
"What?!!? I'm important!!"
"Exactly!"
"You guys suck..."
"Woo-hoo! No more Gaara! I shall be the favourite sand sibling! HA!" Kankuro cheered as he performed a victory dance that looked suspiciously like the Macarena....
Gaara glared at his older brother....what an idiot, couldn't he make Gaara's final moments at least half sane?? Why was Gaara destined-no that sounded like Neji...hmm...Why was Gaara stuck with the idiots all the time??!!? Why did they only have cheese at home?? Were zebras white with black stripes or black with white stripes?? Gaara was so caught up in trying to answer the questions that haunt him so, he didn't even notice when Kiba and Kankuro tied a rope around his arms and torso and suspended him from the rafters on the ceiling.
"Oh mighty demon! We give you this important sacrifice-"
"Important and red-headed..." Kiba whispered to Kankuro.
"Oh right, We give you this important and red-headed sacrifice! In exchange, please do not kill us!!" Kankuro finished before getting down on his hands and knees and bowing to Nae, gesturing for everyone else to do the same.
"This piece of literature failed to have the answer to my dilemma as well!!" Naruto growled in frustration, throwing the dictionary over his shoulder, hitting Kankuro and knocking him out cold.
"Ah! The demon can control dictionaries!! She is pure evil!!" Kiba screamed as he dived under his desk.
"On the contrary my dear friends and acquaintances, she is merely deep in slumber. At least that is the conclusion I have drawn," Naruto said pushing his imaginary glasses further up his nose.
'Um Naruto? Whats up with you?" Sakura said peering at him curiously.
"Oh noes! That evil book made me smart!!"
"The dictionary?"
"Yes! Make it stop!!!!"
"It has stopped.."
"Oh jolly good-AHH!!!!"
"Hey try drinking a glass of water upside down..." Shino offered, he decided to be helpful for once because he felt that he didn't have enough lines in this weird fanfic.
"Alright, many thanks to you!" Naruto smiled and gave Shino a good old pat on the back as he set of on an epic journey full of danger and romance to find...a glass of water and a way to drink it whist standing on his head.
"Uhhhh your welcome?" Shino said uncertainly but Naruto was long gone.
"Has anybody else noticed that Sasuke's missing?" Sakura said extremely worried, if Sasuke was missing who was going to be team 7's token emo?-I mean who was she going to love with all her heart...heh heh.....yeah.
"OH NO!!!!!! SAS-what's his name again?" Ino asked her forehead furrowed in confusion.
"Um Sasuke?" Chouji offered.
"Thats it! OH NO!!!! SASUKE MY ONLY LOVE!!!" Ino cried in anguish, her hair temporarily forgotten.
Meanwhile with Sasuke
Those idiots! We could just jump out the window instead of staying in there with all those crazies! Sheesh...
Sasuke gave himself a pat on the back for his brilliance, before the ground gave way underneath him and he fell into a giant pit.
Curses! How could I have been defeated! And by a hole! How will I ever kill Itachi now? Hmmm maybe if I make the hole my ally...No that's a dumb idea!....I shall make it my minion!! Muahahah!! his name shall be Robert! It's ingenius!!!
"Alright giant pit! Your name is now Robert! You are my minion! And together we shall kill my butt-face-weasel of an older brother! Do you understand?"
"........."
"Alright! I've got an evil minion, I've got an evil minion! Oh yeah, yeah, yeah!" Sasuke chanted as he did an edited version of Kankuro's victory dance, there was no way he was putting his hands on his hips and shaking them...a guy has to draw the line somewhere!
Back in the classroom
"Oh Sasuke....." Ino cried as Sakura tried to console her as she too cried her eyes out. Suddenly the door burst open and they saw four figures standing there, one being dragged along the ground by his collar. The loud noise caused Nae and Shikamaru to wake up abruptly.
"Hey Nae! You lost something!" Caity said cheerfully as she dragged Sasuke into the room by his shirt collar, Sasuke was scowling with his arms and legs crossed. Gah! Now my minion and I will never kill my butt-face-weasel of a brother!.
Caity threw him roughly near his seat and bounced back to the front of the classroom.
"See guys! Everthings fine, you were worrying for nothing!" She said in her very well practiced 'duh' voice. Terese and Tash looked around the classroom, Gaara was suspended from the ceiling, Sakura and Ino were still hugging, Shino's tea party was in full swing, Naruto was in the corner of the classroom, standing on his head attempting to drink a glass of water, Sasuke was in his seat sulking and covered in dirt, Kiba was fanning a knocked out Kankuro, Temari was rocking backwards and forwards hugging her knees, Neji was nearly unidentifiable underneath all the white stuff on his face, Tenten was snickering beside him her face beet red, Lee was running laps of the classroom yelling about the 'fire of youth' etc etc, Hinata just kept staring blankly ahead, unblinking, Shikamaru was looking around with a WTH look, Chouji was munching on chips, unaffected and the entire room had burn marks everywhere. They rolled their eyes, yeah everything was peachy alright!
"Oh Sasuke where are you!" Sakura cried dramatically.
"I'm right here?"
"Oh your Sasuke?"
"Yes!"
"Oh...um.....Yay! Sasuke's back!"
"Sasuke's back?? Where?!!?" Ino cried looking all around her.
"He's right there!" Sakura said pointing to the sulking, raven-haired boy.
"That's Sasuke?"
"Yeah I know.."
"Oh well! YAY SASUKE'S ALIVE!!" Ino cried as she and Sakura jumped for joy, the token emo-I mean their one true love wasn't eaten by a vicious giant armadillo as they had previously thought.
"Ok well you survived your first hour, lets see how you go under Tash's strict rule!! Tata!!" Caity called as she dragged Nae and Terese out of the room, slamming the door causing the rope holding Gaara up to break. He fell to the floor, threw the ropes off and returned to his seat quite pleased with himself, he had come to the conclusion that zebras were black with white stripes!! Tash strode to the front of the room, hands on her hips, she glared at each one in turn, the evil glint her eyes even eviler than the red-headed demon spawn's aka Nae's. They gulped, suddenly they wished the insane demon would come back and save them..
Well that's my second chapter...I am making our personalities a little bit more extreme, In real life Nae loves fire and does actually have a little voice in her head or so she claims. She is not actually this insane in reality, although she does always sleep in maths hence her falling asleep half way through the chapter. Hope you liked it and as always review!! Pleaseles!!! ^^