Chapter Three

Sachie

It turned out that I didn't really have a choice. Chiko flatly refused to talk to me regardless of what I did about the whole Fuji thing.

Not wanting any more trouble, I steered clear of him if I could, hoping that I could cool Chiko down that way. I wasn't going to give up my best friend since third grade for some guy. Even if that was exactly what she was doing. I waited till the last minute to go to Math or English classes, saw which seat Fuji was in, and chose a spot as far away as possible. I went out of my way to avoid him in the cafeteria and hallways, all but running in the opposite direction when I saw him coming. Unfortunately, Chiko was doing the same to me.

I had tried everything, but sadly, nothing seemed to work. By the end of the first two weeks after our fight, I was thoroughly sick of not talking to her. That was the one thing I hadn't tried. Partly because, being the naturally social person she was, Chiko had made dozens of new friends who always surrounded her. And partly because I knew she wouldn't listen.

Only, I had to try, hadn't I? I missed her and knew it. Not being able to take it anymore, I approached her during lunch break, a little before the bell.

Miraculously, she was alone. "Chiko...uh...how're you doing?" It was very disturbing, not knowing what to say to her when I'd known her for more than half our lives.

"Oh look, it's the boyfriend stealer," she sneered.

Whoa, that was harsh. "Chiko," I sighed, praying for patience, "Chiko, two things. One, I really never meant to come between the two of you, honestly, and two, he's not exactly your boyfriend. Yet."

"Of course he isn't," she hissed. "Because you want him to be yours."

"Chiko," I exclaimed, beginning to lose my cool. "How many times do I have to tell you? I like him, yeah, I admit it. But I'm your friend. I always was. I'd never go for him if you wanted him. And honestly, why would he ever choose me over you?"

"Yeah, whatever you say, boyfriend stealer. You call me your friend? What kind of friend goes around snatching away people's future boyfriends from them? When your 'friend' has liked that guy for a whole year? Huh? What kind of friend is that?"

She just didn't get the point, did she?

"Fine," I snarled angrily. "You call me a boyfriend stealer? I'll be a boyfriend stealer. Only the person I'm stealing was never your boyfriend." Once I had finished rubbing it in, I marched off to my next class, which both I and Chiko shared with Fuji.

She's gone too far this time, I thought heatedly. I was going to confess to him, once and for all. I had yearned for this unconsciously for three years, I had wanted to do it, and now I had the lousy excuse to back me up.

Still, I didn't proclaim my undying love for someone every day; so I couldn't help but falter as I entered the classroom and saw him sitting there. My resolution started to melt, and I nearly backed down, but my still smoldering pride forced my legs to carry me towards him.

Gulping, I stepped up to him. I had never felt so nervous; never. I was so used to Chiko being right behind me in everything that doing stuff alone bothered me. Ironically, I was doing this exactly because she wasn't there by my side.

"Um, Fuji? I—I've got to tell you something," I choked out.

"Saa, good afternoon, uh...excuse me, I can't seem to recall..."

There I was, about to tell him the biggest secret of my life, and he couldn't even remember my name.

"It's Tezumi," I told him numbly.

"Ah yes, I remember. What do you want to tell me?"

"Um," I cast my mind around, trying to think up some excuse to tell him. Glancing at his desk, I blurted out, "You did questions 13, 16 and 21 wrong and your proofs for the others are horrible."

I didn't even wait for his expression to change--not that it would've--but turned on my heels after this outburst and charged out of the room.

So that was that. I was just another nameless, unimportant fan girl in his life. What else could I have done, besides thank my stars that I hadn't told him what I really felt?

Don't get me wrong, it still hurt. Oh yes, it definitely hurt. I'd just been rejected in the most cruel way possible, how could it not? But much to my amazement, my world didn't instantly fall apart. No, I felt nothing of the sort. There was pain, but that pain was weak, like how I normally felt when I got disappointed because I had failed a test. I felt terrible, but I would live.

Plus, a part of me actually felt happy that all the mystery had been cleared up. Now things were simpler. I sought out Chiko.

"Chiko," I went up to her with a teasing smirk.

"What?" she spat, though only half-heartedly. She knew that smirk.

"Guess what?"

"I couldn't care less," she declared. But I could tell she was curious. Once you're known a person for over six years, you know how to pull the strings.

"You couldn't care less that at this moment, Fuji's alone in a classroom with some horribly done Math homework? You don't care that you could go and bond with him over common puzzlement of algebra?"

"Really?!" Chiko was so predictable. "Why didn't you tell me—wait. Why are you telling me? Why aren't you there? You like him," she asked suspiciously.

"I liked him, Chiko, I liked him."

She rushed off without another word.

I did feed kind of bad, because I really was lying to her this time, instead of just withholding information that she wouldn't have wanted. Sure, Fuji could still speed up my pulse, but I was long past the stage of wanting him with every fiber of my body. True, the guy was hot, and would probably stay that way for some time, but the truth was I didn't know him very well. Too bad it had taken me three years to find out.

And the calculator, lunch and book thing? All accidents. By pure dumb luck he had ended up sitting with me two lessons straight. He had never felt anything for me at all, if forgetting my name was any indication. It had just been my wishful thinking making a fool of me.

I went off to class and found Chiko nearly jumping up and down with joy. I just let her. She could think whatever she liked about Fuji and I wouldn't mind. At least we were friends again, and could return to our giggling, whispering, note passing days.

I no longer had to hide when I saw Fuji coming my way. Almost every day, I would see his seemingly warm smile, which still looked like it was just for me, but I knew it would never be mine. For a split second I would stare into the eyes that had held my heart captive, and I saw absolutely nothing. And I would let him pass me by without a word.

We were people from two different worlds, and as much as I wanted to, I couldn't get into his.

Walking past me, he never glanced back.

He had gone his way. I would go mine.