Enjoy!

Juilliard- Year 1

I remember the second time I saw Juilliard, it seemed so much bigger than what I recalled. I mean I remembered it being big from my first visit during senior year, but somehow it seemed even larger. The difference was this time I was looking at it through the eyes of a Juilliard student. This was my school, the place that was going to represent home to me for the next four years of my life. My time here was going to reveal the first steps of my future.

My mom and I weaved through the halls carrying as many suitcases as our arms could carry comfortably. I looked over at my mom to gauge her reaction, even she looked overwhelmed. (I wondered if it was too late to go back…Albuquerque was sounding unbelievably good right now.) I was just about to fall victim to one doozey of a panic attack when my mom found my dorm room. As we walked through the door, the first thing I noticed was the window. I slowly dropped my bags and walked over to it. Bracing my hands on the small window ledge I looked out onto my new city. All of the sudden, my breathing became normal and my heart slowed to a more normal beat. A feeling of comfort took over and this inner knowledge that it was all going to be okay.

I focused my gaze on my mom and smiled. "Are you ready for round two of luggage?"

My mom's face broke out into a grin, "Baby, I was born ready!"

I stifled my groan as I rolled my eyes. "Let's go then."

It was later in the evening by the time my mom and I got everything unloaded. My mom had headed back to her hotel room. She offered to let me stay with her, but I figured I needed to rough it out in my dorm room. Besides, I hadn't even met my roommate yet. I propped myself up on my pillows, set my laptop in my lap and contemplated which Wildcat I was going to e-mail first. As I sat there zoning out my thoughts drifted to the person they always seemed to drift towards…ah, Ryan. (Surprise, surprise right?) I wondered what he was doing, if his move was successful, if he was thinking of me at all…and then I stopped myself. If he was thinking of me, it was in a strictly "friendly" fashion. Remember, while it is true that by this time in our story there had been some elongated looks, nothing else had happened that would lead me to believe we were anything more than friends. (With a capital F-R-I-E-N-D-S…wow, funny how the angsty feelings come back a bit while I write this part in my story.) I felt the butterflies fluttering wildly in my stomach as my hand reached towards my cell phone to call him. (God, I am so weak!) Suddenly the door opened…and Marissa entered my life.

The tallest, tannest, blondest girl I had ever seen danced into my room. (Which is saying a lot, since Sharpay was the previous owner of that title…well, except for the "tall" part.) Her hair was a beautiful shade of gold and hung down to her waist. And honestly, to me the girl looked to be 10 feet tall. (She was actually 6'1…which she still taunts me with every time I see her.) And then in the most lyrical voice possible she introduced herself.

"Hi, I'm Marissa. You must be Kelsi. It is so nice to meet you in person, since I guess we have already been formally introduced via e-mail. Sorry I am late; I'm a bit of a procrastinator. You are studying music and composition right? I'm a voice major, singing really. Did I already tell you that in my e-mail? God…it is heavenly to finally be here."

Marissa paused for a breath and gracefully plopped down onto her bed. (I didn't know there was a graceful way to "plop" before Marissa.) She looked over to where I was sitting. Later she revealed to me that she had never seen someone looking at her with such an overwhelmed expression.

I took a deep breath and tried to remember the first comment she had made. You see, along with talking A LOT, Marissa also has a tendency to speak super fast. Marissa finally took pity on my loss for words.

"Sorry, sometimes when I get nervous I talk a million miles per minute."

I looked at her with surprise in my eyes, "You were nervous…to meet ME?"

She laughed that lyrical laugh again, "Well of course, weren't you nervous?"

I started laughing with her, "Of course" I uttered.

Before I knew it we were both laughing together.

"We are going to be alright," I told her.

Marissa looked at me with the friendliest brown eyes, eyes that reminded me a lot of my best friend back home…"Darling," she said in a faux English accent "We already are."

I was sleeping soundly when my telephone rang. I heard Marissa grunt as she threw a pillow over her head. I reached blindly for my phone; I figured it was more important to find that than my glasses.

"Hello." I yawned.

"Kelsi?"

My eyes popped open, all traces of sleep left my body and the butterflies went into overdrive while I fumbled around looking for my glasses.

"Ryan?" I whispered. I didn't want to wake Marissa.

I grabbed my room keys while I made my way into the hallway. My small body slid down the wall and settled onto the cold floor. While the floor was cool, everything else about my body was steaming. I tried to control my swirling thoughts as I listened to Ryan.

"Hey Kels, sorry to call so late."

Ohmigosh, he called me "Kels" that was… like… a nickname. Ryan gave me a nickname. I wondered if it would be appropriate to scream out "Hallelujah" about now. Probably not; so I refrained…barely.

I ordered my voice to sound normal, "Oh, it's no problem…I was pretty much awake." (Lightening please don't strike me down for lying.)

Ryan cleared his throat, "Um, Kels…I was wondering, could I come over there? Maybe we could meet outside to just hang out for a while? I don't know about you, but I am feeling a little overwhelmed right now."

I literally pinched myself. (Ow, that hurt.)

"Sure," I managed to squeak out, "I will meet you downstairs. My dorm is-"

Ryan interrupted me, "I'll be right over Kels, I already know where your dorm is. Meet you outside?"

Of course he knew where my dorm was, I made sure I told him during the summer. "Okay, I'll be right down."

Looking back, I probably should have checked out my wardrobe choice before sneaking out of my dorm. But I mean, come on, this is Ryan…my mind wasn't really focused on fashion at the moment. So there I was sneaking out of my dorm room in my extremely short red East High gym shorts, an oversized t-shirt with my tangled mass of curls resembling a lion's mane more than a human head of hair. The minute I stepped outside the doors, I searched for Ryan. I took me less than a minute to find him. He was sitting on a bench, wearing plaid shorts and a polo. He was concentrating quite hard on folding the hat that was presently in his hands.

"Ryan," I said.

He quickly lifted his blonde head up, "Kels." There was relief in his voice.

I quietly walked over and sat next to him on the bench. "Ryan, are you alright?"

He looked at me with the bluest eyes, "I miss them. I miss my family so much."

Understanding dawned in my features. "Well, aren't they still here? I mean, my mom is staying at a hotel in town?"

Sadness entered his eyes, "My parents couldn't stay, with work and all. And Sharpay, well, she is already at U of A."

And then I did something completely out of character for me. I leaned over and hugged Ryan Evans. And as I did, a feeling so right took over my entire body.

"Then I guess it's good we have each other." I whispered.

You are now all allowed to squeal, as I will with you…eeeeeeee!