Chapter Twenty-Two: Harry and Ginny

Diagon Alley was awash in noise and color. Neville stayed close to Harry's side, letting the smaller boy fist a hand in the back of his jumper when people knocked into them from all sides. The potions that Healer Fabing had sent with Neville had helped Harry tremendously; the shakes, while not vanished, had subsided to the point where Harry did not have to worry about keeping his hands hidden at all times. The weakness in his legs was fading bit by bit, something that the Blacks took all credit for.

Harry let them.

The days with Neville in the Black Manor when much smoother than when Harry was alone. The ex-Gryffindor was good at finding ways of directing attention away from subjects that Harry did not want the family to dwell on – a talent, Neville had confided to Harry, that he'd learned when his family would pester him about his magical abilities.

It was less than a week until Hogwarts started. There was a dearth of students flooding the alley. Sirius had an arm around Ginny's shoulders, beaming at any and all who would look in their direction. His pride seemed to radiate from his skin.

The night before was Neville's first introduction to Healer Fondorn. The Healer had barely looked at the other boy, spending most of his glare on Harry instead. His improvement was credited to the Healer's fortitude and correct assessment of Harry's 'condition'. He was warned to stay away from the Malfoys and all things gloomy in the coming months, to make sure he did not return to his previous ways of thinking. Ginny's knee had been examined as well, but to Harry's inexperienced eye, it seemed like the man poked at the joint a few times and spent most of his attention on how Sirius was taking the news.

The pronouncement of Ginny's healing ligaments was met with joy and celebration. Harry and Neville had hung back from the tearful affair. Bill had been fire-called and told the news. Sirius had swept Ginny off her feet and off to the stables, where he declared she could have a pick of all the new horses they were to get in the coming year. Harry had watched them go in silence.

A burst of music from one of the shops jarred Harry from his thoughts. His hand, buried in the back of Neville's jumper, tightened. The other boy leaned into his space, bumping their shoulders together. When they were back at school, Harry promised himself to find something nice to do for Neville and Blaise as soon as he could. He didn't deserve such friends.

"All right, kiddos and not-so kiddos," Sirius flashed Remus a grin. "What's first? Ice cream? The Quidditch shop? Clothes?" He nudged Ginny's elbow.

"Books," Harry spoke up. Sirius wrinkled his nose.

"Come now, Harry! That's the last thing James would have done! I know," the animagus stopped in the middle of the street. "Let's eat!"

"But we've just had breakfast…" Harry could see the sign for the bookstore just past his godfather's shoulders.

"No! Absolutely not!" Sirius grabbed Harry's arm and hauled him forward in a half hug, half drag. "We're going to go eat, because everyone knows that young wizards need to eat almost every other hour! It's practically law!"

Harry gritted his teeth together and let the older man lead them away. The dream from the night before still lingered in his mind, the sharp colors of the sign almost bleeding out onto the sidewalk. There was something he needed from that store. Something important that had to happen, but he did not know what.

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It had been a long day. Remus and Sirius' pockets were fairly bulging from the purchases they had made. Ginny had gotten a whole new wardrobe for the school year. Harry had tried to get out of the exhaustive fitting, but had been over ruled. He didn't like most of the choices, and when he did try to speak up for something, he was shot down by Ginny's girlish exasperation. No, he was told. Brown is not in this season. Try the sepia. It's all the rage!

Harry thought sepia looked a lot like brown.

Their last stop was the bookstore. The sign loomed large in his field of vision. Shivers worked their way down his back and goose flesh stood out on his arms. Something was going to happen.

They entered into controlled chaos. Students Harry recognized bustled around the store – some of them even recognized him and stopped to say hello. He could not remember most of their names. The cheerful exchanges did nothing to quell the rising feeling of intent that was hovering in his mind. He wondered when…

"Harry!"

He turned, heart jumping into his throat. Seamus stood behind him, a shop apron on and a load of dusty books in his hand. Neville turned with Harry, a smile spreading across his face.

"Hello there, Seamus," Neville reached out and clapped the other boy on the shoulder.

"Hold these!" Seamus thrust the books at Neville and all but tackled Harry. "It's good to see you, mate! We were so worried!"

Harry let out an embarrassing squeak. Seamus laughed and let him go. "Seamus," he said after catching his breath. The feeling of intent had gathered close and was buzzing in his head. "What are you doing here?"

"Me? I work here." The boy struck a pose. "Been working here the whole summer, I have. Put away quite a nice penny too," he winked. The jovial smile faded at the edges as he leaned in close. "Look, I know it's been mad this summer. I've been here in the center of it. Sasha's rented a room here too. We've been reading up on some stuff."

The intent bloomed and vanished, leaving Harry shaken. His knees went out from under him. It was Neville's quick catch that saved him from falling into an embarrassed bundle on the floor.

"Harry?" Neville's voice was pitched low.

"It's – I had a dream, Neville," Harry ran a hand over his face. "I had to come here. It might have something to do with Seamus, but I don't…"

"Harry? Hey there, kiddo, you okay?" Sirius' booming voice broke in. Harry resisted the urge to swear and stomp his foot like a child.

"I've got it, Harry." Neville passed his hold to Seamus and turned to the approaching animagus. "Harry? He's fine – caught me, actually. We almost went down like a stack of bowling pins." Neville's blush was a fine touch. "Mr. Black –,"

"Come now, Neville. It's Sirius."

"Ah, yes, Sirius, I was wondering about – well, you know." Neville leaned forward. "Your ability," he gave the man wide eyes.

Sirius lit up with excitement. "Really? How wonderful. Come this way, my lad and we'll have a nice discussion, yes we will." Sirius had a hand around Neville's wrist as he led the younger wizard deeper into the store.

Harry let out a long breath. "I don't know how I'm going to repay him."

"Neville?"

"Yes."

"He's been helping you?"

"You have no idea." Harry shook the crowding thoughts away and turned back to Seamus. "You've been reading up on something with Sasha?"

"Yeah." The other boy was eyeing Harry. "Mate…you're shaking."

Harry stuffed his hands in his pockets. "It happens."

"A lot?"

"It's because…of the thing."

"…I thought that was taken care of."

"…How did you know about it?"

"Tabloids are full of information about you being misdiagnosed with all kinds of stuff and some bloke called Healer Fondorn reports have been leaked and that you might be unstable, until that was rebuffed and now you're fine and just a susceptible young man under the thump of tyrannical Slytherins," Seamus shrugged with a roll of his eyes. "You know how it goes."

Harry's nails cut into his palms. "I'm going to –," he snapped his mouth shut with an audible click. "There are…problems, but we can't talk about them here."

"What about Black?"

"He's part of the problem." Harry shook his head. "You got a place where we can talk?"

"Yeah, let me tell the manager I'm taking my break. Come on." Seamus led them away towards the cash register. Neither of them saw Ginny emerge from around a stack of books with a strange, worried frown on her face.

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Harry looked up at the soft knock. It was late; most of the household had gone to bed. Harry had stayed up, writing everything he could remember down in his notebook. The legends that Seamus and Sasha had come across were fascinating, but he had no way of knowing if any of it fit until he got back to school.

The knock came again. Harry stuffed the book under his pillow and hid the ink and well in the bedside table. "Come in?" It was rare anyone waited for his approval to enter in the Black Manor.

Ginny's face appeared around the edge of the door. "May I come in, Harry?"

"Sure."

She slid into the room. Her cane was nowhere to be seen. She closed the door behind her with a soft click of the latch. They stared at each other.

"What's wrong?"

She leaned back against the door and licked her lips. She would not meet his eyes. "You've been lying to us again, haven't you?"

Harry felt the muscles in his shoulders grow taut with tension. "Ginny?"

"All this time, when we thought you were getting better, you were lying, weren't you?" Ginny stayed near the door. "You still think you're sick."

Harry set his jaw and reminded himself about his promise to be nicer to the girl. "Ginny…look at me. Remember how I was at the end of the school year?"

"I remember."

"Do you remember what Madam Pomfrey said?"

"But Healer Fondorn…"

"Healer Fondorn is a fool," he snarled. "He's been leaking reports about what goes on at the house for everyone to read in the tabloids!"

"Harry," Ginny's scandalized yelp tried to silence him. "He would never do that! He's good, he's really good – he even knew that my knee was going to get better and –"

"And I bet you can barely walk on it right now."

Her face darkened with a violent blush. "I'm working on it."

"You're going to damage the ligaments even more."

"You can't think that way, Harry!"

"I can think any damn way I want!"

"You still think something's wrong with you!"

"I don't have to think it, I know it!" Harry's palm slapped down on his comforter. "I dream it, every night Ginny! I see things that will happen, that can happen, that might happen, and I have to remember them because it might have something to do with what's going on with all the murders!"

"But they have nothing to do with you!"

"Yes, Ginny. They do."

"Sirius was right," Ginny whispered. "You are going mad."

The silence was immediate and thick.

"…What?" Harry asked.

Ginny pushed away from the door, taking a few hesitant steps into the room. "When Healer Fondorn arrived, I told him about your muggle relatives," she said.

Harry's jaw ached. "You what?"

"They said – they said that the kind of negative behavior you showed was reinforced by negative rewards…or something like that," she waved a hand away. "Healer Fondorn said you probably had no choice as to whether or not you'd go barmy one day, but if we caught it soon enough we'd be able to stave it off for a while."

"I'm not mad, Ginny."

"But Harry…" Her eyes were bright with tears. "All of this, all of it, Healer Fondorn expected. The lying and the protests, he said – he said you would even believe it since it would make everything in your mind okay. That because of what those muggles did to you, that you would never be completely sane and that if we could give you a stable home life, with structure and discipline – and maybe I should have told Sirius sooner about all this…"

"Ginny. Ginny, wait." Harry felt panic swell in his throat. "Just…stop, all right? I'm not mad. I'm not lying." The girl's rising hysteria hovered right before tears. If she started sobbing it would alert Sirius and then he'd be in a world of trouble. "Look…just give me some time. Seamus…he's a good guy, okay? He – we're just talking about some work we started last year. Remember about our research with the gods?"

"…Research?"

"Yes, you remember that? When we did the rituals and everything?"

"…Yes."

"Well, there was a bunch of old legends that we were meaning to look up and check out, just to make sure we weren't doing anything bad. That's what we were talking about, that's all."

"But you just said…about the murders…"

"Well, some of the old legends are pretty bloody. We just want to make sure we know who's who."

"But you said it had something to do with you."

"Well, since we – all of us, freed the gods, I guess you're right. It's not just my fault, it's your fault too." He hated the sudden stricken look on her face.

"What…what a horrible thing to say."

"Look, it's something we're looking into." Harry tried to bury the guilt that burned the back of his throat. "If Seamus' research is right, then we did nothing wrong. There's been no bloody mass murders in the name of a god on English soil that we can find. So it's probably the work of crazy wizards or a cult of muggles or something."

"But…your dreams…"

"You're probably right about them," he waved it off. "Dreams just help me put information together. Random bits of things we learn coming together in crazy ways. Maybe they'll help with something, maybe they won't. But if I keep a record of them, then maybe I can learn something."

"…But…"

"I'm fine, Ginny. Really. Haven't I been doing better?"

"But you don't like Healer Fondorn."

"I hate him," he said it without spite. "I don't like him, he makes me nervous and now I know why."

"But…he's just worried for you, Harry. Everything that's been done has been done for your well being."

"And you've been left out, is that it?"

She recoiled a step. "What?"

"I didn't ask Sirius to worry over me like a mother hen."

"Harry, that's an awful thing to say about Father."

"You're calling him that, now?"

"…I try. I can't settle on Father, Dad or Da. None of them seem…right."

Harry shrugged and looked away. "It's up to you."

"You could call him dad too, you know."

"He's not my father."

"It's the thought that counts."

"Sirius knows who my father is."

"Well, he just doesn't want you to forget James."

Harry turned back to her. "I never knew him, Ginny." He held up a hand to stall her protest. "Look…do you believe me or not? I'm not mad, I'm not going mad and I'm not lying. All of this just has to do with research from last year. And the OWLs we forgot to take, which I haven't been able to study for at all."

Ginny was quiet for a long, long moment. "I should tell Sirius what's happened," she finally said. "Healer Fondorn is not wrong. There is something wrong with you, Harry, up here." She touched her temple. "I kept quiet last year when Pansy and Millicent wanted me to tell them about it. Well, mostly quiet. I should have spoken up then."

"Maybe you should have," Harry nodded. "Then I wouldn't have had to go back to the Dursleys. That would have helped a lot."

Ginny spread her hands out in front of her. "The Dursleys – you always said they never harmed you. But they did and now it's affecting you."

"No, I don't think it is anymore."

"It is." Ginny chewed on her lower lip. "I…I'm not going to tell Sirius. Not now. If – If what you're staying is true, then fine. It's just research. But…I'll be watching, Harry." She said it with a heavy sigh. "I – I want to believe you're okay. I want to believe that you're not mad. So I'll stay quiet. For now."

"Thanks, Ginny." Harry felt his throat close at the words. She shook her head and stayed quiet, limping from the room with obvious pain. As the door closed behind her, Harry thought he heard the shattering of something that might have been friendship. Might have been family.

Might have been nothing at all.

End Chapter Twenty-Two