Chapter 8

"Do not protect yourself with a fence, but rather by your friends" Czech proverb

It had been a long a time ago since Luna set foot on Hogwarts grounds and it didn't quite feel the same like in her school years, she thought while walking down the hallways to the dungeons. It used to feel safe, almost like a second home. Luna remembered how secure she felt, even though there were people bullying her. Hogwarts used to make her feel safe and now it felt like there was something missing. Perhaps I'm the one who changed most, she thought. After all most of her days now were filled with visiting Harry and keeping herself occupied from hearing the voices that were trying to lure her to places she knew she didn't want to go to. Even at Hogwarts she could see shadows following the students who were running through the hallways, probably hoping that they wouldn't be detected by Filch or one of the teachers. But today she was here to meet Hermione Granger and Severus Snape. To be honest she was quite surprised when she received an owl from the both of them requesting to meet them to talk about something important. After the Final Battle she didn't hear much about the both of them, besides what she had read in the Quibbler or the Prophet, even less after she stopped reading both of the papers. Hermione had tried to contact her in the beginning and even went along to visit Harry in St. Mungo's , but in the end Luna had wanted to go alone and stopped answering the invitations to come along and eventually Hermione stopped owling her. Perhaps it was some kind of intervention after seeing Hermione a few weeks ago, some idle attempt to get her on the right path again, but Luna couldn't imagine the Severus Snape cooperating to something like that, so it must have been something else. She had discussed the possibilities of why they might have invited her with Harry, as she had discussed almost everything she did nowadays with him, but the only reply she got was a brightly colored ball rolling towards her like it did with everything she discussed with him. Even now while she was walking towards the door of the Potions lab, her mind was working overtime to figure out an answer. When she looked up again, she noticed she already arrived at the Potions lab and knocked on the door.

It didn't take very long before she was installed at the office next to the Potions lab with a steaming hot cup of tea sitting across from a smiling Hermione and a surprisingly serene looking Professor Snape. It confused Luna, it almost looked like something was going on here she didn't know about and it wasn't just the reason why she was here. It wasn't until Hermione started to talk that it hit her. Before Hermione started talking Luna saw her smiling at Snape in a way she used to look at Harry. Smiling into her cup of tea, Luna tried to focus on what Hermione actually was trying to tell her.

"… Studying the effects of certain potions and Transfiguration spells and see what kind of effect they have and how they might help in finding the cure to people who have suffered from Cruciatus. We think that we are very near to an answer, but quite frankly we seem to be stuck."

A cure? Something that would help Harry recover? For some reason it angered Luna in a way she couldn't completely understand. "So, in a way you both are now at the point where many scientists like yourself stranded in finding a cure? What has that got to do with me? Are you trying to make me understand that Harry will never be the same again and I should get on with my life?" So it was some kind of intervention and Professor Snape probably agreed to it because he had the hots for the bushy haired witch, Luna thought to herself. It made her even angrier. Why couldn't they leave her alone?

"What Miss Granger was actually trying to tell you, is that we need some help. And seeing as you are sitting here now, I'm inclined to think that you can figure out for yourself, that we need your help. " Snape drawled.

"In my opinion, it would be best if you stopped pitying yourself and start thinking about the future, instead of clinging on to the past and pretending that you are the only one in pain, when in fact thousands of people have lost loved ones to Cruciatus or even worse. I would have imagined that one such as yourself would have put your brain to work for a change and figured that out on your own. Apparently I was wrong. " He continued.

Luna felt foolish and confused at the same time. Foolish for thinking they were trying to help her get over Harry, especially because Hermione lost Harry as well. And confused about why she was here. Why they needed her help. Snape had just caller her self-pitying and even selfish. She could see truth in his words, but that made her wonder even more why they would need her help. Was it her connection to Harry? Or did they feel sorry for her after all? It couldn't be just because of the fact that she was a Ravenclaw. There were more of them out there, some of them even esteemed scientists knowing more about Cruciatus than life itself. Luna had known about that, because she had tried to read every book, thesis and theory that there was to find about the subject.

Hermione must have spotted her confusion or at least tried to break through the uncomfortable silence that was hanging in the room, when speaking up.

"I wouldn't have put it quite that eloquently as the old bat here." She said while glaring at said bat, who just smirked.

"But last time I saw you, I did notice a change in your demeanor. You're more jumpy and have bags under your eyes. Even now I noticed you get angry about the mere notion of mentioning of a cure for Cruciatus. I won't lie to you, I was worried seeing you like that. I was used to seeing a dreamy looking young woman that annoyed me till no end with her random outbursts about Hobglobbering Bobdingers or however you called them, but you always inspired me with your positive look on everything in life."

"War changes people, Hermione. Time changes people. I can also remember the time when you didn't stare that affectionately at Professor Snape as when I came into this office, but that changed as well." At that point Hermione had the decency to blush and Luna noticed that even her former Potion's professor pale face sported a blush. "Perhaps I've been selfish and perhaps all I do is pity myself for the fact I lost the love of my life before I could even tell him. It confuses me. I don't know what to do. When my mother passed away, I missed her dearly, but somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew I would see her again one day. That we would be reunited and tell each other what has been going on in our life or afterlife. But with Harry it's different. I can see him every day, but he isn't there. I can meet whenever I want and I can tell him everything I need to tell him, but he isn't there. It's driving me so far from who I am to the point I start seeing things, even hearing voices calling out to me." Tears were rolling over her cheeks. Luna never imagined telling this to anyone. Let alone Hermione or Snape, but there was a time where she considered Hermione to be one of her closest friends, together with Harry, Ron, Neville and Ginny.

Looking up she saw Hermione was crying as well. Snape was holding Hermione's hand and looked up to Luna. "Perhaps now it's the time to take action, instead of watching yourself sink away in the abyss you have created for yourself. Harry would not have wanted you to pine away, doing nothing." he said.

Luna sighed and nodded quietly. She then felt a hand taking her own hand and squeezing it gently. It was Hermione who was still slightly sniffling and looked puffy. "Perhaps we can help you out and at the same time you can help us out. " She said. "Both of us and Ginny Weasley are asking you to join our research team. And before you say no, I just want to explain to you, why we wanted to ask you."

Luna stayed quiet and nodded again, so Hermione continued. "The first time we started thinking about adding another member to our research team has been quite a while ago, but everyone we could think off as remotely compatible with the rest of our team, didn't meet our requirements. We actually started to give up on ever finding anyone. That was until I saw you again a couple of weeks ago. It occurred to me that you looked different. It almost seemed to me like you were turning into a ghost of yourself. I wanted to help you on the spot, but I reckoned that you were too much of a free spirit for that. It wasn't until I told Severus later about how you were in the past, that I had come up with the perfect addition to our team." She gave a apologetic smile towards Luna.

"When we first met I thought we could be the best of friends, you were a Ravenclaw and I was arrogant to think that every Ravenclaw was supposed to be a snooty bookworm just like me, even though I was a Gryffindor. But you were completely different from me. Even though you were brainy just like me, you had qualities I lacked a little in some way. You displayed an unwavering faith in the world around you and it seemed like you trusted more on your intuition than most of us did. It used to drive me insane, probably because it scared me in a way I can't quite explain myself. But when I befriended you, I learned that despite everything that was making you so unique. And that's exactly why we want you on our team, because of the different insights you might have on the subject."

"But what if I can't meet up to that expectation anymore?" Luna said. She wasn't the same person anymore. Not the one Hermione was talking about. What if she couldn't bring anything useful into the research?

"Then it would still be nice working with a dear old friend." Hermione said while she smiled, hoping her friend would accept their invitation. Hoping that the memories clouding her nowadays would dissipate if only a little.

"And if that's not reason enough for you, we can always use someone to clean after Miss Granger has blown up one of her beloved experiments." Snape smirked at Luna, who started crying again. Luckily this time he could see that they weren't tears of sadness. "I take that as a yes to our proposal?" He was glad to see her nodding her head.