The front door slammed as my dad left, echoing through the still house. I sighed, and flopped on my bed. So… I had five hours to myself. What to do now?

With no better plan, I decided I should probably put some pants on before I scared the neighbors. I struggled to pull them over my knees whilst lying down. Failing miserably at that, I stood up, and hopped around my room, continuing to wage a battle against the dreaded skinny jeans. Just as I succeeded in yanking them over my waist, an abrupt howling filled the house. I shrieked and fell over.

"Toby." I sighed, the name muffled by the sock that had somehow lodged itself in my mouth. I spat it out. Yuck. When was the last time I had washed that thing? The howling increased in volume.

"Alright, Toby, love. I'm coming already!" I cried over the shrill wails. I clambered over a particularly large pile of clothing, and tumbled out into the hallway. Making my way gracefully down the hallway to the nursery, I ran into a doorframe. I swore, and staggered into the room. Toby, red in the face from crying, stared mournfully at me from his crib. I sighed.

"Okay, Toby, what do you want?" I put my hands on my hips. Toby stared at me. And stared. And stared. And stared. And…

"Oookay, then." I rubbed my hands together. "How about a story?" Toby blinked.

"I'll take that as a yes."

I walked over to the crib and picked him up.

"Once upon a time, there was a beautiful young girl whose stepmother always made her stay home with the baby." I paused. Toby blinked expectantly at me. "The baby was a spoiled child." Toby looked rather hurt by that. I hastened on. "He wanted everything for himself, and the girl was practically a slave. But what no one knew was that the Goblin King had fallen in love with her and had given her certain powers." I paused for dramatic effect. "One night," I continued in a hushed voice, "when the baby had been particularly cruel to her, she asked the goblins for help. '"Say the right words," the goblins said, '"and we'll take the baby to the goblin city, and you will be free.'" I smiled evilly. Toby looked a little worried. I winked at him. "But the girl knew the King of the Goblins would keep the baby in his castle forever and ever, and turn it into a goblin. So, she suffered in silence until one night, when she was tired from doing housework, and hurt by the harsh words of her stepmother, and she could no longer stand it."

Toby started crying.

"Toby, you know I didn't mean any of it." I sighed. I leaned down and looked him in the eye.

"How would you like to see a goblin?" I asked. Toby's crying lessened. He sniffled.

"I wished the goblins would come take you away right now!" I cried theatrically. Toby looked around expectantly at the goblin-less room. No one appeared out of thin air. No goblins popped out from behind a cupboard. Toby screwed up his face for another crying fit. I groaned.

"Sometimes I wish that the goblins really would come take you away."

And then the lights went out.

Good Lawrence. I can't believe I spent a whole paragraph on how Sarah was trying to pull her pants on. Ugh. Anyways, terribly sorry it took so long. I can't say what happened. I blame Pan, though... Pan shifts nervously. And for those of you who don't know it... Pan is my imaginary friend. Uh, one of my only friends, actually... Say 'hi' to the nice people, Pan! Pan waves. Well, that's all for now... except Larry the Zucchini would really like to go to a nice home, and I'll give her (free!!!) to the first person who reviews! I know who've all always wanted a pet zucchini... so, review!!!!!!!