AN: Thank you so much for the really kind reviews. Thanks for letting me know which point of views you like, I'll keep that in mind for future chapters.
Warning: As usual, language.
We arrive at the De Luca residence and all take a moment to take in our surroundings. The house itself is large but it doesn't seem well kept with paint peeling and a tear in the screen door. The mailbox is missing its door, and the grass is peeping through the already three inches of snow. The expensive cars in the driveway seem to clash with the house, but in some odd way it works and looks homely.
We all get out and I knock on the door. A blonde teenager answers it. It's about ten degrees outside but she is dressed in a mini jean skirt, a skimpy shirt and boots that I believe are called Uggs.
"Can I help you", she asks snottily. Her hand is on her hip, and the other with fake nails is playing with a blonde curl.
Abby takes a picture. God help me.
"We are here for Tony", Ziva states.
"Which one", she asks rubbing her eyes from the flash.
Elena appears at the door suddenly and hits this blonde creature.
"Bianca", she says angrily, "Let these people in." Then to us, "I am so sorry, please excuse my daughter, she's a bit hungry. Please, please come in."
It's quite loud inside: laughing, screaming, and the song "That's Amore" is playing lightly in the background. The interior of the house is nothing like the outside, it's actually quite stunning. And it smells delicious.
"Thank you for holding dinner", I say, "Thank you very much"
"For you", Elena responds, "Not a problem, we're so pleased to have you."
I force myself to smile at her and stay polite tonight despite how much I want to wring her neck for dragging DiNozzo into this.
"Your house is beautiful", Ziva says.
"Oh this is Beatrice's", Elena responds, "I live two blocks down. Let me go get Tony and I'll tell Bee that she should throw the mac's."
"Mac's", McGee questions.
"Pasta", responds Elena.
"You throw pasta", McGee asks.
"You know", she says looking at him like he's half retarded, "Like put them into the water?"
"Oh", McGee says.
"From macaroni McGee", Ziva says laughing, "Mac's."
In a second I hear feet pounding, and see DiNozzo holding a wine glass.
"Hey", he screams, "You guys all made it!"
He comes over and hugs and kisses all of us, including myself.
"DiNozzo", I say, "I just saw you."
He doesn't let go. Aw kid, didn't anyone in your life ever do anything for you? Ever pay you any kind of attention? Didn't anyone ever tell you that you worth the time? He holds my neck and doesn't release me for a good three seconds over what is considered customary.
"It's alright DiNozzo", I tell him softly.
He pats me on the back and leads us in keeping his arm wrapped around my shoulders. I have noticed this once or twice before; anytime I am angry with him immediately after he becomes clingy. It's an odd word to use to describe DiNozzo but that internal need for approval forces him to keep himself near the source of the problem and just test it until he knows for certain where he stands. Usually he isn't this touchy-feely, but I have a feeling it's a result of the alcohol.
"DiNozzo", I say quietly so hopefully the others won't hear, "We're good."
He doesn't let go, or show any outward signs of reception, but I can tell he's listening.
A crying woman greets us in the kitchen and hugs and kisses each one of us as well.
"Thank you so much", she says crying, "I'm Carmine, Jamie, and Christian's mom, and well, thank you all so much for clearing my boys!"
DiNozzo's arm slips from my shoulders becoming nervous.
"Ma'am", I say, "Really it was all Tony, we're just here to help settle this once and for all."
"Yeah God forbid I get any kind of credit", yells Simona sitting at the table.
She stands up and greets us offering her hand.
"It's nice to meet you under better circumstances Agent Gibbs".
I grab her hand.
"It was something the two of you pulled off in there", I say.
"We try", she says with the same glitter in her eyes that I often find in Tony.
"Would you all like anything to drink", Beatrice asks.
We all politely decline, but the woman is insistent until finally I give in and let my team drink. If I intend to get answers from these people I might as well not start off by upsetting them. She orders Tony to pour the drinks, which he does quite sloppily spilling the wine every which way.
"Anthony", she chides, "Watch that, it's expensive."
"I'm doing it", he says gruffly, "I got it."
McGee, Ziva, and Abby's heads all shoot up to DiNozzo.
"What", DiNozzo asks after noticing.
"You are speaking differently", Ziva states.
"I'm drunk", he says back honestly, "Sorry boss."
"It's alright DiNozzo", I say back, "It's off time." Well for him it is anyway. And after our little work out session, hell today in general, I would want a drink too.
"No that is not it", says McGee excitedly, "You have a New York accent!"
"Sorry", Tony says indignantly, "I'm drunk. It's slipping."
"That explains it", Abby says, "I never could pin it before!"
"Pin what", DiNozzo says moving onto the last glass.
"Whenever you're tired, you always sound different."
"This is so cool", McGee says happily.
"No", says Beatrice, "Tony doesn't have an accent."
"Yes ma'am", I respond. I guess compared to her he wouldn't have an accent.
Tony serves the wine glasses and we all try to hold them where there isn't wine spilling down the side. DiNozzo is about to sit with us but out of nowhere three huge men come in from the backdoor and tackle him. Each are dressed in dark wash jeans, with gold rings and chains, and leather jackets. I recognize one as Dom, another as Carmine, and the third I think I know from the funeral but I don't have a name for him.
"Hey", Beatrice starts yelling, "Knock it off! Take it outside, you are in my house, the hell's the matter with you! Oh, take your shoes off, you're tracking in dirt!"
The three don't seem to care about anything other than getting DiNozzo.
"Hold him", cries Dom, "I got something real sweet for you baby."
"Hey", Tony screams while breaking a smile finally, "Aunt Beatrice, help me! Dom, I swear it wasn't me! It was Nicky!"
"Like hell it was me", the third assailant yells while holding Tony down.
Abby stands up and takes a picture.
"Aunt Louisa", Tony screams for some woman who I presume is in the next room, "Your stupid ass son is going to fart on me, come on!"
Beatrice looks mortified and immediately goes to get Dominic as far away from Tony.
She starts beating Dominic, Carmine, and Nicholas (or so I'm presuming) with a wooden spoon and runs them out of the room.
"You flying fuck", Dominic screams, "I'll get you back! You just wait and see!"
"Oh what language", Beatrice screams, "We have company damn it! The hell's the matter with you? Curse like that in my house, who does he think he is? Louisa spoiled that one."
"Oh my God", McGee whispers, "This is so cool, they are like real authentic movie Italians!"
I slap him, and I don't give a reason. I don't especially feel that I need to. Tony jumps up and finds a seat next to all of us. Jamie comes walking in, eyes us, especially Abby, (and over my dead dead dead body will that ever happen) but abandons us in pursuit for food.
"Ma", he says, "I'm starving here."
"Almost ready", she says as if she's said a hundred times.
An older man comes in who looks like an older version of Dominic.
"Bea", he says, "When are we eating here? It's friggin nine o'clock now."
It's eight fifteen.
"Oh Raymond", "I want you to meet our guests. They are helping us on this case. They work with Tony on very important things."
"Oh so you are the ones helping out Beatrice's idiot children", he says gruffly, "We really do appreciate all of your help."
He pulls up a seat.
"Raymond Leone", he says while pulling up a seat, "So you guys all work together huh?"
"Uncle Ray", Tony says drunkenly while taking another sip, "I work with these people. This is Gibbs, he does shit. This is McGee, he's really good at computers, he hacks into shit, and that's Ziva, she kills people, and that's Abby, she's a princess."
Said princess is delighted and takes another picture. Seriously Abs?
"Hey chief", Raymond says while taking the glass away from Tony, "Why don't you give me this until dinner."
There is a crash in the living room followed by screaming.
"Go see what that is", Raymond says gently to DiNozzo, "They all miss you."
Tony looks at me for approval.
"Hey", I say gently, "Go enjoy the time you have."
Tony nods and runs off.
"Excuse my nephew" he says, "He's just real excited to be home, and he never could hold his liquor. Like I said, we really do appreciate your help. If there is anything you need, let us know."
"Actually", I say thankful that we happen to be in the only quiet room in the house, "I would like to ask some questions after dinner, or now if there's time."
"Well you can ask me anything now", Raymond responds, "But I'm not so sure how much help I can be to you. You really want to talk to the women, they are the ones that know things."
"Mr. Leone", Ziva starts, "What can you tell us about Donna Brunelli? We have evidence that she is alive. Can you tell us about that night she was supposingly killed?"
"Ah", he says scratching his head, "Look, you really want to talk to the women. Elena would know better, or my Louisa, I'm not really so sure. I mean we all took it at face value, a cop came to the door during dinner and told us she was dead, we had no reason not to credit it."
"Do you remember the police officer's name", I ask.
He scratches his head again, "Something Italian. Yeah, Russo I think it was."
"Sir", McGee says, "Could it be an Andrew Rossi?"
"Yeah", Raymond responds, "That sounds about right."
"Boss", McGee whispers, "That was the name of the officer that has gone missing."
"When was he reported missing", I say quietly back.
"Prior to the accident", he responds.
"Check into everything regarding Rossi after dinner."
"You think he's a dirty cop", Raymond asks.
"Right now sir, we're just looking for information."
"About Elena", I say, "Her last name is Brunelli, but she has a child, divorced?"
"Never married", he responds.
"Mr. Leone", McGee says, "Police have found records of your family communicating with another family that is suspected of mafia connections, do you-"
Shit McGee.
"We are not mafia", he stands up screaming. "You little shit, you come into our house and accuse us of something like that? You're just like those damn cops at the station. You listen here, my father came over to this country with nothing but the clothes on his back. He had no shoes until he was-"
"Raymond", Beatrice yells, "These people work with Anthony."
He sits back down angrily.
"We are not mafia", he says again.
"I apologize for our insensitivity", Ziva says coolly, "You have to forgive my associate, he does not realize how heavily charged that word is within the Italian community."
Raymond eyes her.
"You Italian", he asks, "Sicilian maybe?"
"No signore", she responds her eyes laughing.
"Well nobody's perfect", Raymond responds to Ziva and then to McGee, "Sorry kid, didn't mean to jump down your throat, it's been a long day."
"Still sir", Ziva continues, "Can you explain why someone in the DiNozzo office was taking calls from this other family?"
Raymond is quiet. His eye gaze looks away. Well he sure as hell knows something.
"You have to talk to Elena", he finally says.
"I'm talking to you", I respond.
There is another crash and more screaming only this time someone sounds like they are in pain. We all immediately rush in to see what is happening.
A largely obese man is rolling around on the floor, and surrounding him is a broken chair. DiNozzo, Carmine, Dominic, Nicholas, and Monica are howling with laughter.
"Paul you fat fuck", Dominic says with tears coming out of his eyes.
"It's broken", Paul says, "Oh it's actually broken! Call an ambulance! Call an ambulance, I'm dying, I'm dying! Ma! Ma!"
"Shottie not it", screams Nicholas. "Not bringing him."
A woman comes rushing down the stairs and falls onto her knees hysterically crying.
"Oh my God, my son, my son! Somebody do something!"
Abby takes a picture.
Simona comes into the picture, rolls her eyes and grabs car keys.
"Dominic", she says, "Carry him out, I'll bring him to the ER. Ma, stop crying he's fine."
"Mom, mom" he cries, "Are you there mom?"
"I'm here baby", she says, "I'm here."
"It's getting dark mom."
"No", she shrieks, "Stay away from the light!"
"Ma", Simona cries, "Give me a break, Paul, shut up."
Mrs. Parsano smacks Simona and upbraids her daughter, "Don't you talk like that to Paulie, can't you see he's dying!"
"He's not dying mom", Simona sighs.
"Mom, mom", he says crying as Dominic helps upright him, "I want a Jew doctor. You make sure they give me a Jew."
"Yes baby", she says, "Yes."
"Dominic", Simona cries, "Get him in the car. Come on mom."
"Oh God", Tony cries, "I think I ripped something laughing. He is so fucking fat!"
"That was my mother's good chair too", Carmine says, "Hey Simona, can we sue your fat ass brother for breaking my mother's seat?"
Simona flips them off and disappears.
"We're still eating on time right", screams Jamie to his mother in the next room, "Ma, right? I'm starving!"
Well I'm real glad that I came running in here and blew my interview with Raymond Leone. We were so damn close. I try to rearrange everyone back to the kitchen, when another visitor comes in.
Peter DiNozzo.
Tony is lying on the ground laughing, tears pouring out of eyes until he realizes that everyone else isn't laughing anymore. He looks and sees his father. He gets up.
"What are you doing here", Peter DiNozzo shouts, "You're not supposed to be here."
"Yeah huh", Tony says back maturely, "I was invited!"
"Get out!"
"No!"
"You left, you aren't welcome here anymore!"
"I was here first! You leave!"
"I'm older!"
"Aunt Beatrice made my favorite!"
"What? No, you don't get to pick what we eat!"
"She offered, because she loves me!"
"Get out!"
"This isn't your house, you can't do that."
"Get out!"
"No!"
It comes down to a staring contest, until Tony starts laughing hysterically.
"Are you drunk?"
"Really drunk."
"You're fucking drunk? In front of your fucking boss? And hello to you to Mr. Gibbs and company I'm so glad you all could make it to this as well. This is a family event."
"This is a family event", Tony mimics his father.
"Beatrice", Peter screams storming into the kitchen.
We hear more screaming between the two, but apparently Beatrice wins out because within seconds she calls and invites everyone to the table for dinner.
(Tony)
I'm actually wasted. I don't know how this happened. I had one glass of wine, and then I had another. I needed one more, but Dominic offered to get it for me, and ah shit, he fucking spiked this. Fucking asshole. Well maybe dinner might be better if I am drunk.
Let's recap shall we?
My boss, coworkers, and my family, and said family includes my estranged father, are sitting at the same table. You know what? Drunk might actually be the best way to approach this. Aunt Beatrice has tried to separate my boss from the more problem people in the family, yeah likes that's going to work. Yelling has never been a problem in this family. I with my coworkers have inhabited one end side of the table the liaisons sitting next to us from Little Italy are Dominic who is seated next to me followed by Nicky, and then on the other side next to McGee is Bianca and then Mary. Everyone else in my working family is surrounded by each other.
Shit, where is my drink? Who took it? I swear I had it at one point. Damn it Dom, what the hell did you give me?
I punch Dominic.
"Ow the fuck", he cries.
"Hey", my uncle Raymond yells, "We're fucking saying grace here, have some fucking respect!"
"Sir yes sir", I yell automatically.
Everyone at the table is looking at me now, and Gibbs looks amused. Well fuck me.
"He spiked my drink", I scream.
"Anthony", my father yells from the other end of the table, (I guess my aunt thought we would be a problem together), "For once in your life can you please not embarrass me?"
I can't hear exactly what is being said but I see my grandfather yelling at my father in Italian.
"Ha", I yell. "Doesn't feel too great, now does it pops?"
"Anthony", my aunt Luisa starts, "Basta!"
"It's not my fault", I yell, "He spiked my fucking drink!"
"Do not make me come over there", someone yells and before I know it someone is hitting me repeatedly. But then my drink reappears so I'm going to let it go. I guess grace is over because everyone is eating. I look down to see what is being served and before I can start in, I look at my coworkers. Oh shit. They're looking at the food like it's going to strike them. Well, Ziva doesn't seem to have a problem with it.
"S'wrong", I ask, and shit when did the slurring occur? I did not authorize that.
"Something is wrong with the food", my aunt asks nervously, "What's wrong with it?!"
"What is it", McGee asks.
"Salad", I say hurt.
"It has tentacles", McGee says, "Ow!"
I look to see why McGee is in pain, but I can't seem to find the source.
"It's fine Tony", Gibbs says.
"It's fucking delicious" I hear someone say angrily, "The hell's the matter with it?"
I look back, and oh shit now everyone is looking at my coworkers like they are naked or something. Wait, are they? I check, and nope. Still clothed. Someone from the Italian end of the table is saying something about hicks and southern hillbilly's but I'm afraid that if I look too vigorously for them, I'll puke.
"Stop looking at them", I say to the family.
"What's wrong Mr. Gibbs", I hear my father say snottily, I can always recognize my father's disgusted voice, "Don't like seafood?"
"It's delicious", my boss replies diplomatically.
"You haven't eaten anything", my aunt Beatrice says.
Well what the hell is wrong with it? I do not see the controversy. Before I take another sip, I look down at the salad. I'm not seeing the problem here, except, oh.
Its' a seafood salad. I forgot that was an Italian thing. Inside it has octopus legs chopped up, squid, snail, shrimp and other delicious critters from the deep sea. The salad in and of itself must have been incredibly expensive to produce and now my work peeps want nothing to do with it. Ah feelings are going to be hurt all around. Where the hell is my drink again?
"Hey guys", I say, "There's more food, don't worry about it."
The rest of the family is glaring at them and no one is speaking until they eat it. This is what fish in a fishbowl must feel like.
"Ziva's eating it", I cry indignantly.
"I thought you said you weren't Italian", someone says.
Right, because only Italians eat seafood. You know I have voices in my head, multiple voices that told me that this would be a bad idea, but did I listen to any of them? No. Not one of them. Shit, they are still looking at them. Gibbs and Abby seem to be stomaching it, but McGee looks like he's going to pass out. I have to create a diversion, quickly.
I take my fork and jab it into Dom's leg.
"Ah shit", he screams startled jumping up, "Oh holy fuck, what the fuck is wrong with you?!"
Everyone is looking at Dom. Success! Attention diverted!
"Oh no", I say, "Look at that fork in your leg. How ever did it get there?"
Hmm, perhaps I forced it in too deeply. It looks quite embedded. Dom is grabbing his leg a little too forcefully, it almost looks like he's in real pain. But thank God for small favors, my uncle Raymond looks pissed at Dom. And as it should be. This is his fault anyway, it's always his fault.
"Dominic", my uncle screams, "Look we're eating here, you think it can wait?"
Dominic screams in response. My aunt Louisa is trying to make it over to us but there are too many chairs in her way and not enough room for her to move around. She's kind of hefty.
"Dominic", my uncle yells again, "Knock it off!"
"Shottie not it", Nicky says. "You are bore with dugs man."
"Holy shit", Carmine adds, "I know, remember that one time we gave him that Ec-"
This is not better! So I decide to keep drinking until I can't hear anymore of this, unless, genius strikes! I get up and grab the wine and bring it over and start filling up my coworkers drinks. I'm brilliant sometimes.
Was that a flash? The hell was that?
"Dominic", my uncle Ray yells again, "I'm not going to say it again, knock it off!"
"There's a fucking fork in my fucking leg", he screams.
"You think that's bad", my uncle retorts, "When I was in the army I was shot three times and-"
Not enough alcohol. It apparently can never be enough. Everyone is screaming now, and I give up. Dominic goes somewhere followed by someone else, and the dinner resumes.
"Don't you think you've had enough", some blonde creature asks me. Holy shit that's Bianca. The last time I saw her she was in diapers, and didn't have breasts displayed for the whole world to see.
"If you were me", I say, "Would you have had enough yet?"
"You are going to need rehab or something."
"Rehab's for quitters!" I tell her.
"You stabbed your cousin?"
Where is that voice coming from. Ah ha, Gibbs! I found you!
"Your welcome", I say.
Hmm, I never noticed it before, but Gibbs has this vein pulsating. Interesting.
"Tony", Abby says to my right.
I look over to her, and when she stops spinning, I answer her.
"This is awesome."
That's because Abs is non-judgmental and wonderful.
"You are a kind soul", I tell her back.
"Hey baby what's your name?"
I look over and see my cousin Jamie looking my way. Hmm why? Is Jamie hitting on me? Ew. I'm sorry if I were gay, I could do so much better.
"Abigail", Abs answers.
"That's not my name", I tell her.
Wow, Gibbs looks angry. I stand up.
"Where are you going", someone asks me.
"Find Dom", I say.
"He's going to the emergency room", another voice tells me.
"No he's not", another one says, "He's not a pansy like Paul. That's the problem with these kids today, they don't' know pain."
I snort. I'm sorry, but I know pain. This is painful. This is actually agonizing.
"You find something funny Anthony", my father says. "Please do tell what has been so hard in your over lavished life."
And now they are all looking at me.
"I need a drink."
"You see, there it is" my father continues, "What the hell do they know about-"
Oh shove it.
"I was shot" I say without emotion, and suddenly this is just tiring, "I've been shot, stabbed, infected with the plague, kidnapped, starved-"
"Well that's nothing", someone says, I locate the source, it is again my father. Certo.
"You want to know what real pain is Anthony", my father says, "Real pain is being tortured so that-"
"I have been tortured", I say looking at him. The entire room is silent.
Shit this discussion is sobering me fast, and that is not ideal considering these circumstances. But I can't seem to stop myself.
"One time", I say, "I was tied up to a chair so the guy could just keep wailing on me, another time I-"
Ah, my drink! I grab it and leave. I decide that I am done with this conversation. No one likes a one upper. I finally find my cousin in a bathroom bandaging his wound.
"I knew you wouldn't go the emergency room" I say.
"You have two fucking seconds to explain this", he says.
"I love you Dom."
"One!"
"Okay, okay, I had to save my coworkers. Everyone was looking at them. And also? You spiked my drink, so it had to be you. Are you coming back to dinner?"
He pulls his pants back up over the wound.
"Yeah, you know I am."
Upon our return the second meal is already in place, and thank God it's just normal pasta with sauce. My coworkers seem much more excited about this course and dig in with more zeal. Everyone likes pasta. The conversation could be better however. It goes back from "those fucking pigs" regarding them raiding to the church to me and Simona getting the immunity statement. Right because it was Simona's idea. Hmm interesting. No one is talking about Aunt Donna's body not being in the coffin. Which is suspicious. So that means that they are all in on it. If no one is going to question why my aunt's dead body was not in her coffin, or even say something about her life, then that means they know something I don't. It also means they are working me. Wonderful. I have a senator demanding my badge and they can't even let me in on the big family secret. See now this is why I'm drinking.
"So", I say trying to make conversation on the other end, "How was the ride up?"
"It would have gone better if a certain someone was not complaining the entire time", Ziva says.
"I had bladder distress", McGee cries.
"I've been there man", I tell him.
"For three hours", he says.
"That's cruel", I say, "You guys should have pulled over for him."
"Hey", someone says, ah, it is Dom.
"What", I say.
"You alright", he asks me.
I nod. Shit, dizzy now. Note to self, do not do that again.
"I'm fine", I say. He ruffles my hair.
"You let me know, okay kid?"
"Jamie was hitting on me", I tell him.
He's looking at me oddly again.
"It's cause you're my Italian Stallion."
"I am your Italian Stallion", I repeat back faithfully.
And ow! Someone kicked me from under the table. Well what the hell warranted that?
And someone else is snorting. Well thanks a lot Ziva. She's just jealous that Israeli doesn't rhyme with stallion.
"Mary", Bianca says, "I have to show this new purse I got, its coach, and its pink! I bought it just for you."
"How", I ask, "Elena just gives you money to buy gifts for Mary?"
"It's my money", Bianca retorts.
"Where'd you get that much money", I ask.
"I have a business."
I look at her.
"She's a serial bride", Dom offers. "Don't tell her mom, she'll kill her."
"What do you mean she's a serial bride", Gibbs asks.
"It was stupid Simona's idea" Dominic sighs, "And she never meant for you to listen to her or anything. Simona was just saying hypothetically that she should have married her cheating fiancé and then taken half. So genius over here decided that she could do that, so she keeps marrying and divorcing people while taking some money."
"How old are you", Abby asks.
"Twenty", Bianca retorts, "I'm legal."
I can't find my drink so I take Dom's, and I proceed to spit it out.
"Oh it burns", I scream, "What is that?"
"A man's drink", he responds.
"I'm a man", I say back.
"You're a child", he responds back.
"I shoot people" I tell him.
I stop talking and realize that Gibbs is talking to Bianca. Now why? Why does he have to communicate with the other half? It's much easier to protect them if they don't openly initiate conversation. Italians see it as a challenge, and this bottle blonde could very well be exactly like my Aunt Luisa in disguise with a fit teenage body. Someone somewhere however distracts me from this, and has the brilliant idea to say, "Hey I have an idea! Let's tell Anthony stories to our guests!"
I have an idea too. Let's take another drink. I guess I should be grateful that they are trying to include my guests into the conversation but, really? They couldn't have found a better way to do it?
"Oh", Ziva says, "I would love that. Do you have anything especially wonderful?"
I'll give you something especially wonderful.
"I have stories", my father says.
Well of course you do. You weren't home for the majority of my childhood but somehow you have stories.
"I have better ones", my aunt Louisa cries.
"Oh", Abby squeals, "This is going to be great. Do you have any baby Tony pictures?"
Some other female squeals and assures her that after dinner she will show us. And there goes the rest of my drink. Now where is the jug?
"Here's my favorite Anthony story", my father says.
Maybe he's forgetting that we're estranged.
"My son the genius broke his ankle playing something or other, and instead of telling anyone he didn't say anything for a week!"
"How is that my fault", I ask, at this point I'm just curious. If the sun fell out of the sky I'm sure that would be my fault too
"Anthony", he says in his most condescending, "No one is going to know what is wrong if you don't learn to speak up."
"I called you" I said, "Like seven times!"
"I didn't have time for that", he says disgustedly, "That's why you had all those people in the house to take care of you."
"They didn't!"
"Anthony", he says, "People get tired when they have to work long hours, I'm sure you know nothing about it, but sometimes workers just don't want to deal with anything extra. That is why I have such loyal employees because I would never ask someone to go out of their way like that."
Everyone looks like they are waiting for the good part of the story. Well I have news, it's not coming.
"The end", my dad offers.
"Wow dad", I say, "That was a great story. I'm really glad you told it. That wasn't a painful memory or anything."
"What about the time he left you", Nicky adds, "In Hawaii or something, and then that guy tried to kidnap you and make you his sex slave."
"Yeah", I say, "You know what it's very difficult to keep things suppressed when you keep reminding me."
"So I get this call", Nicky says, "Now mind you I'm like thirteen, and Tony's like what, ten or something?"
"Eight", I reply.
"Okay eight", he continues on, "And I get this call and he's like, 'Nicky! I'm all alone in paradise! I'm going to live here for the rest of my life on the beaches!' Twenty minutes later he calls again and he's like, 'Nicky, this guy keeps following me and says he wants to take pictures of me because I'm so cute, but he wants me to take my pants off-'"
"That's not funny", Mary shouts out unexpectedly. The laughing immediately stops.
"Thank you", I cry, "Thank you Mary!"
And the awkward silence has returned. Excellent.
"I have a good story", Uncle Ray says, "I get a call from their school that Anthony is threatening to kill himself-"
Okay so if there isn't anymore wine, there has to be beer here somewhere. I get up and go to the fridge.
"Anyway", my Uncle continues as I return, "The school officials don't know what to do so they let him out of detention, just because he wanted to off himself!"
Ziva, Abby and McGee are openly laughing, so I guess that's kind of good.
"It worked", I say, "Not my fault that other people are sensitive."
"Oh well what about the time", my aunt Louisa gets in, "the social worker came to the door and says that Tony's been a victim of rape! Turns out he was having sex with at teacher in the faculty room."
"Oh shit", Nicky says, "That was with Ms. Preston!"
"Wait", my father says, "Ms. Preston, your math teacher?"
That he remembers? Of course that he remembers.
"I knew you couldn't pass that class", he screams, "I knew it! You little shit! I should have put you in military school for that summer! I knew you couldn't pass it on your own!"
"Hey", I yelled, "You put me in a calculus class just so I would fail! I wasn't going to fucking military school during my summer break, and Ms. Preston had a tongue ring so really, it was a win win."
I'm not even going to look at Gibbs. I'm not going to look at anyone to my right actually. I can hear Ziva laughing hysterically, and Abby giggling but I hear nothing from Gibbs. Wonderful. It's almost like I'm in hell.
"Alright you amateurs", Dom says, "I have the real Tony stories."
"No" I involuntary yelp.
"You stabbed with me a fork", he reminds me.
Huh, my beer is already gone. Well that's just magical.
"Dom", I say, "I'm begging you here."
"Relax", he tells me while patting my head, and dude, watch the hair, "This is a good one."
"In high school", he says, "Tony had more detentions accumulated than anyone else I have ever known, but despite that most of the teachers really liked him because was just so gosh darn cute."
He pinches my face and I swat away at him.
"What did he get in trouble for", Abby asks.
Why?
"Everything under the sun", my father says. "Sex in school, fighting, smoking, drinking, you name it, he did it. One time he even brought a cow into the school."
I think back. Oh yes, that was actually spectacular.
"Anyway", Dom says angry that the floor has been taken from him, "Everyone knew that Tony was good at dancing. I don't know if you guys know this, but Tony is a really good dancer."
Well, that's true.
"He used to dance everywhere", Dom continues, "Dancing under the desk, dancing on the lunch tables, dancing with the lunch aids, if you had a pulse, Tony would have danced with you before he graduated high school."
"Tony", Abs tells me, "I didn't know this! We should go sometime! I love dancing too!"
"Abs", I say, "That would actually be awesome."
"So", Dom starts in again, "This competition came to the school, there was always a competition for something, but the winning school would receive a bunch of new free computers which the school desperately needed. And since there were so many budget cuts it was a real problem. The school had promised that they would get new computers by the end of the year so they had to buy them, but in order for them to do that they would have had to let go a bunch of janitors. So the principal made this bet with Tony that if he won the competition she would personally forgive all previous and future transgressions. He would have to dance one Latin dance, and one traditional ballroom dance. So Tony agrees and everyday after school a Spanish teacher would teach Tony the steps to the Salsa, and some gym teacher who apparently know ballroom taught him the Waltz."
"Oh yeah", I say, "Mr. Petretelli. That was so odd, cause I had to dance with him the whole time before they could find me a girl partner."
I ignore my father's sound of disgust.
"Oh shit", Nicky says, "I remember that girl they gave you, what the hell was her name?"
"Colette Kwolaski", I say dreamily, "Now she could dance." I look at Gibbs, "She used to dance ballet, so she had those long legs. She really was amazing."
"Tony", McGee says, "Did you ever take dancing lessons as a kid?"
"Over my dead body", my father yells, "That was for fags."
Thanks dad.
"It was for fags", I tell McGee deadpan.
"You know Peter", my Aunt Louisa says, "You really should have done things different with him."
"Don't tell me how to raise my kid!"
Okay drinkie, it's time we meet again. I take another sip, a slow sip, of Dom's drink.
"I would have loved to have done tap or jazz", I say, "They really can move."
"Hey", Dom yells at my dad and aunt, "I am speaking here!"
"Do not yell at your mother", my aunt yells right back.
"Ma", Dom whines, "Please."
She huffs but let its go.
"Anyway", Dom says, "The day of the competition, all these janitors come to the show to cheer on Tony and Colette. It was such a big deal that it made the news."
"The local news", my father states, "It was like a two minute segment."
"I still have that paper Anthony", my aunt says, "I can show everyone after."
"Anyway" Dom says, "These two come in second out of seventy schools."
"Yeah", I say remembering the competition, "It was awesome though because we were the only public school. Everyone else had dancing in their schools as part of their gym, we never really had a chance."
"But" Dom says, "The coach of the first place team was so impressed that Colette and Tony were competing and competing so well considering their backgrounds, you know they were the only non Wasp couple. Our school was the only school to produce an Italian and Polish couple. All the other schools were from the city too, ours was the only one from the Island."
"But Tony is from money", McGee says before he can stop himself.
"Thank you", my father puffs out, "At least someone recognizes that!"
I'm ignoring that.
"Bad school area", I say, "My dad wanted to be around family, and this area isn't exactly known for its education. And it wasn't that they were that much better, it was just that they knew more steps and techniques because their instructors were professionals. We had a gym coach and a Bolivian immigrant, and google. They only got more points because they had more variety."
"You know I could have just purchased the computers for the entire school", he continues, "You didn't have be a fairy and then further humiliate yourself by loosing."
"It wasn't humiliating" I say and I look square in the eyes, "If you had come, you would know better."
"Would you let him finish the damn story please", my Uncle Leone yells.
"Yeah", Dom yells back, "Let me finish! So there's Tony and Colette in second devastated because they didn't win the computers and the janitor's are going to loose their jobs. So the janitors rush up onto the stage and hug them and are thanking them anyway. Colette and twinkle toes over here are crying so much too that it grabs everyone's attention. Finally someone informs the first place team why everyone is so upset, and why there are janitors on the stage. The first place team was so impressed that they relinquished their right to the prize and gave it our school."
"Yeah I remember that" Carmine says, "It was crazy. Everyone was screaming. It was really cool."
"Tony", Ziva says, "You must show me your moves."
"Hell I'm drunk enough now not to care", I say getting up, "You got music?"
"You sit down", my father barks, "Fairy for a son."
God, sometimes I wish I was gay just to piss him off. I really wish I liked cock, because oh how delicious could this be right now if he hated me for that too. I should have become a kindergarten teacher, or a nurse. Just to shove it in his fucking face.
"Tony", Abby says, "You promised me first."
Gibbs is laughing, "Tony", he says, "You show us later okay?"
"Okay", I say cheerfully, "I'm really good Gibbs."
"I have no doubt that you are", he says back.
I wish Gibbs was my father. The next course is served which is a meat dish and then we break a while for dessert. Everything seems to be running a bit more smoothly and my alcohol dependence is slowly declining. I come back from the bathroom and see Gibbs speaking with Bianca, ha I knew he would corner her eventually. She's supposed to be cleaning up with the rest of the women, but I guess Gibbs being such a rockstar gets her out of that. They are talking on the stairs quietly with Ziva lurking on the banister. I don't know where the other two went, but for now I'm just going to listen in and see what we get.