When You're Gone
Chapter 17: Everything You Want

"BITCH!" I heaved, "You can have him! Anyone who chooses to be with you instead of me isn't worthy of me! Go on. TRY to satisfy him!"

Reeve jumped back. I smiled sickly, and tears poured down my face. Reeve picked up the now-broken phone. I stood up and stared at him. Tears and a sick smile decorated my face. I held the counter to try to make the room stop spinning.

"Yuffie, take a deep breath... Calm down."

What if I don't want to? What if I want to stop breathing? What if don't want to be calm? Why should I be calm?

I fell onto my knees from hyperventilating. I must have screamed because my voice ached. I fell onto the floor and curled up.

"I loved him," I sobbed, "Why doesn't he see that?"

Reeve stood, watching me.

"Nero did so much for me, and I can't do anything for him!" I wailed.

"You didn't tell about him," Reeve said.

"Not enough! Not enough for Vincent!" I wailed, "But he...I HATE HIM!"

I realized I did. Maybe not hate (that should be reserved only for Shelke) but I sure as hell didn't love him.

"Yuffie," Reeve knelt down so he was facing me. "There are many kinds of people in this world. Vincent's the kind who doesn't know what he has until it's too late."

"It's far too late."

"It's too late for Vincent," Reeve said, "But there's a chance for you and Nero."

I stared at him in shock.

"One chance. Hit or miss."

Ok, story time. Feel free to skip if you don't want to hear how true parts of this story are.

I used to have this friend. (For the sake of this, I'll call him Ren.) I adored Ren, and there was no way that Ren didn't see that I thought of him as more than a friend. He'd stay late when I stayed late so we could ride the late bus together. When my life started to fold in on itself (that was why there were so many delays in my writing) I told him and talked to Ren.

Then, Ren started talking to the girl of his dreams. (For the sake of anonymity I'll call her Lola). He sat with her, and talked with her only. It didn't help that they are both a year younger than me in the same grade. I was pushed to the side, and I tried so hard to talk to Ren and make things work. Lola was a bitch, horrible, but he liked her, so I tried to ignore that.

Later, my mom asked me why I didn't ask for help. If I wanted help with my problems, I need to ask. I looked at her and explained that I had told Ren, and Ren had been there for me for so long, and told me that it was ok, and there was NO WAY he didn't love me, at least as a sister or friend, but then he just pushed me away for Lola.

My mom's face was horrified. She couldn't believe she'd just asked that. We were in the kitchen, and I fell down onto my knees because I was crying so hard, and then I just lay there and sobbed how much I loved him and how he had to have loved me.

Of course, I went to school the next day, and for the next four months I walked past his locker just so I could see him. Half the time he ignored me, or just said, "Wassup?"

Once Ren and Lola broke up so they could be 'just friends' he started talking to me more. I was thrilled.

Last weekend I realized that, while I still don't hate Ren, Ren was only friends when it was convenient for him. He didn't give a shit how inconvenient my entire life was being for me.

I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP.

(Although I wish I was...)

XXX

Eh-hem. Sorry about that. I just had to announce to the world. (Actually, I hope that Ren is there and reads this.) Originally this story was just ShelkexVincent--Yuffie-Nero story, but I realized that I've been pouring a bit too much of my life into it.

The saddest part is that Ren was the second of my friends who looked me up as No one specific. (First was already here...) Now he knows me as no one specific...

So anyway, the title is the song is 'Everything You Want' by Vertical Horizon. If you listen to the song, tell me who it might be reffering to. I realized that it could refer to a lot of people (mainly two) in the story as I was writing this chapter.

XXX

Tonight I graduate from middle school. I'm wearing the dress I wore over Christmas. It's beautiful and green and shiny...

This note was longer than the story...

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